I am – Hercules!!

“Kitchen Nightmares” is very much akin to reality shows like “Supernanny” and “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition,” if one overlooks the fact that its central character is an almost relentlessly angry, profanity-spewing Cowell-esque Englishman.

The grimly fascinating Gordon Ramsay throws around advice and production cash in an effort to help family restaurants correct perceived missteps. Ramsay seems to overcome the laziness of a bullying eatery co-owner and mobster wannabe in tonight’s installment, an arrogant chef and beaten-down mama’s boy in the next.

Tonight’s episode left me very curious about what was being left on the cutting-room floor. Insidiously, this only made me crave a second installment, then a third.

But what matters Herc’s opinion?

Entertainment Weekly gives it a “B-plus” and says:

… Mary Poppins it ain’t – which is fine because the snotty broad couldn’t begin to handle this.

The New York Times says:

… The thrill of watching Mr. Ramsay is in witnessing someone so at peace with his own arrogance. … The subtext of “Kitchen Nightmares” is that ordinary middle-class business owners need brash and brilliant moguls to save them from a sad reliance on their own mediocrity. It is an ugly message that Mr. Ramsay makes undeniably hypnotic.

The Los Angeles Times says:

… It is loud and manipulative and ugly to behold, but it isn't dull.…

The Chicago Tribune says:

… Never mind the cooking; this edition of the show appears to more interested in playing up the family dramas at the restaurants Ramsay visits. Will the spoiled brother in Episode 1 change his ways and start helping out more? Will the harried, spineless manager in Episode 2 start standing up to his mom and his staff? Magically, all these problems are solved by the end of each episode, which makes you wonder just how superficial these makeovers are. (The second restaurant was said to have a terrible stink – what happened to that?) …

The Miami Herald says:

… The show's boorishness is exceeded only by its dissimulation; not one frame of this thing -- from the diners who seem not to notice that their table is surrounded by camera crews to the melodramatically villainous managers -- is remotely believable. Kitchen Nightmares has achieved a rare distinction: It's the least credible reality show on television.

The Hollywood Reporter says:

… formulaic effort replete with all of the genre trappings that we have come to know and endure: the tearing down process, the building-up process, the on-cue clashing, the momentous music that builds to a driving crescendo -- and of course, the editing-for-maximum-sensationalistic-effect.…

Variety says:

… shockingly good storytelling and hilarious. This may be the most compelling show of the new season. …

9 p.m. Wednesday. Fox.

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