Home Cool News Coaxial Reviews Zone Chat Contact Us Sign in

Capone Has A Threesome With BEOWULF AND GRENDEL!!


Hey, everyone. Capone in Chicago here.

First off, let me just thank everyone who made Chicago's first AICN event such a ridiculous success. MONSTER HOUSE in 3-D is the only way to see it, and you should go waaaay out of your way to hit a theatre showing it in 3-D once it arrives. We had a near-capacity crowd that was excited to see the movie and just damn happy to have an AICN that Chicagoans can get to. And everybody seemed to love the movie. Hope we can do it again sometime soon. And now, on to a weird little bastard of a film that I found strangely interesting...

One of the strangest films you're likely to see this year is this bizarre offering based on the 9th century epic poem. Set in Denmark (but filmed entirely in director Sturla Gunnarsson's home nation of Iceland), Beowulf & Grendel [OFFICIAL SITE HERE] begins with the first of dozens of bloody murders of a man looking after young troll-boy Grendel. Years later, the freakishly large and violent Grendel (Ingvar Sigurdsson) lays siege on King Hrothgar (Stellan Skarsgard) and his troops, picking off several at a time whenever they least expect an attack. This results in the king becoming paranoid and feeling slightly emasculated. Fiercely loyal to his king, Beowulf (Phantom of the Opera's Gerard Butler) and his men arrive in Denmark to protect the kingdom and track down this marauding creature.

Director Gunnarsson takes his visual cues from horror films, draping many outdoor scenes in fog and staging Grendel's flesh-ripping attacks as you'd expect to see in a slasher film. The film also moderately successful as a historical adventure featuring more manly warriors than you can shake a sword at.

And let's not forget the mystical element to this story, including a pagan witch named Selma, played with an unusually dirty passion by Sarah Polley. I also liked that the film puts the era's conflicting religious beliefs in context. A Christian priest travels with these Danish warriors (who still believe in multiple gods), and as times get tough and the attacks from Grendel become more savage, they start to line up to be baptized, thinking it will save them from having their head or limbs torn off.

I'm fairly certain that the objective of Beowulf and Grendel is to show us this legendary tale as it might have actually unfolded if it had really occurred. The film is well-shot, even if the entire production looks considerably cheap and under-funded.

Skarsgard is the king of hamming things up, and on that level he doesn't let us down. I'm still not convinced Gerard Butler is even an actor, but he does what is probably his best work here. The entire production just struck me as odd, and you may find yourself wondering, "Why did they even make this movie?"

Still, I was always curious where the story was going and what strange place would the filmmaker take me next. If you're looking for a high-action alternative to superheroes, pirates, animated characters, and Owen Wilson, consider this little ditty.



Capone







AddThis Social Bookmark Button
Click for previous story Talk Back More on this story Click for next story

User login

Reader Talkback

Still not excited
by Superneal
Jul 12th, 2006
04:53:38 PM
FIRST
by maximusdecimus
Jul 12th, 2006
04:54:38 PM
FIRST
by maximusdecimus
Jul 12th, 2006
04:55:00 PM
I hate Grendel
by Engineer_at_peac
Jul 12th, 2006
04:55:10 PM
very good film
by Jarek
Jul 12th, 2006
04:57:12 PM
SHIT and SHIT
by maximusdecimus
Jul 12th, 2006
04:57:49 PM
They turned a monster into a wrestler
by Alkohal
Jul 12th, 2006
05:10:17 PM
i confused this with the Zemekis-Crispin production
by tripp5
Jul 12th, 2006
05:11:00 PM
this came out like a year ago
by IceySpoons
Jul 12th, 2006
05:21:36 PM
This has been out on DVD for a while...
by Alonzo Mosely
Jul 12th, 2006
05:22:56 PM
Sympathetic Grendel
by malcolm_mccallum
Jul 12th, 2006
05:27:06 PM
It's out on dvd?
by maximusdecimus
Jul 12th, 2006
05:28:14 PM
I liked this movie...
by GreatWhiteNoise
Jul 12th, 2006
05:40:33 PM
So does this qualify as a remake for The 13th Warrior?
by wolack22
Jul 12th, 2006
06:00:23 PM
Fuck off Capone......
by godhatesyou
Jul 12th, 2006
06:07:49 PM
Your a mean one Mr. Grendel, you really are a heel...
by Big Bad Clone
Jul 12th, 2006
06:09:45 PM
Yackbacker, learning languages is actually like that...
by wolack22
Jul 12th, 2006
06:14:25 PM
Pictures!!
by quadrupletree
Jul 12th, 2006
06:19:48 PM
13th Warrior and languages
by Caerdwyn
Jul 12th, 2006
06:23:40 PM
THIS MOVIE SUCKED!!
by jackinitraw
Jul 12th, 2006
06:44:49 PM
Wasn't this reviewed in The Zone 2-3 weeks ago?
by antonphd
Jul 12th, 2006
06:45:24 PM
Why does every movie
by Yautja
Jul 12th, 2006
06:47:38 PM
DVD
by misterWINKIE
Jul 12th, 2006
06:47:44 PM
'Twas brilling, and the slithy tb'ers...
by Det. John Kimble
Jul 12th, 2006
06:51:01 PM
HWAET!
by ripper t. jones
Jul 12th, 2006
06:57:14 PM
Actually that slow language transition was done before
by modlight
Jul 12th, 2006
07:06:11 PM
This looks like Vikings vs. Smoothed out pale Klingons
by modlight
Jul 12th, 2006
07:08:53 PM
wolack22
by Alonzo Mosely
Jul 12th, 2006
07:12:49 PM

by CatoTheCensor
Jul 12th, 2006
07:22:47 PM
!3th warrior was one of the best top 100 films
by ChileanSeaBass
Jul 12th, 2006
07:23:23 PM
Not a 'real' version
by malcolm_mccallum
Jul 12th, 2006
07:26:39 PM
Alonzo Mosely
by wolack22
Jul 12th, 2006
07:31:07 PM
modlight
by mascan
Jul 12th, 2006
07:33:19 PM
Why make a Beowulf movie and leave out the dragon?
by CatoTheCensor
Jul 12th, 2006
07:33:53 PM
CAPONE, CAN YOU AT LEAST WATCH THE MOVIES YOU REVIEW
by antonphd
Jul 12th, 2006
07:35:08 PM
Historical Context, Malcom? Give me a break
by CatoTheCensor
Jul 12th, 2006
07:35:49 PM

by CatoTheCensor
Jul 12th, 2006
07:44:13 PM
Yeah, what about the cool 'Beowulf' movie being made
by Atomica
Jul 12th, 2006
07:53:22 PM
Hey, ripper t. jones...
by tucson
Jul 12th, 2006
08:31:07 PM
Any movie set in an age of fire, blood and steel
by kabong
Jul 12th, 2006
09:15:35 PM
wolack22
by Alonzo Mosely
Jul 12th, 2006
09:19:14 PM
The 13th Warrior is not based on Beowulf
by bigbadbua
Jul 12th, 2006
09:26:36 PM
Eaters of the Dead
by malcolm_mccallum
Jul 12th, 2006
09:32:09 PM
Yes
by jackinitraw
Jul 12th, 2006
09:36:36 PM
A Canadian movie that looks like shite? Bollocks!
by Flim_
Jul 12th, 2006
09:52:13 PM
Historical Arthur movies
by cyberskunk
Jul 12th, 2006
10:18:16 PM
Alonzo, you'll have to forgive wolack22.
by detinue
Jul 12th, 2006
11:09:36 PM
Is this a video review?
by chien_sale
Jul 12th, 2006
11:26:22 PM
She-Wolf And The Grundel
by The Ender
Jul 13th, 2006
12:00:05 AM
saw it at the VFS
by heavenlykid
Jul 13th, 2006
02:04:04 AM
Beowulf
by Lost Prophet
Jul 13th, 2006
05:07:44 AM
trippy dragon and bees thing at the end
by Wyrdy the Gerbil
Jul 13th, 2006
06:19:00 AM
Skarsgard is the King of Ham
by Knugen
Jul 13th, 2006
06:58:44 AM
The poem
by Lost Prophet
Jul 13th, 2006
07:52:02 AM
"unusually dirty passion"
by brycemonkey
Jul 13th, 2006
08:30:43 AM
question
by lprothro
Jul 13th, 2006
09:17:11 AM
Wasnt Angelina Jolie in this as Grendals mother?
by Teamwak
Jul 13th, 2006
09:48:15 AM
Grendel the book is excellent
by Praetor
Jul 13th, 2006
10:24:39 AM
Yeah that's the other 'Beowulf' Teamwak
by brycemonkey
Jul 13th, 2006
11:28:45 AM
wasn't Robert Picardo in this?? I loved that episode.
by Flansy
Jul 13th, 2006
11:43:49 AM
I thought Grendal...
by Redrockmullet
Jul 13th, 2006
01:14:03 PM
redrockmullet
by Jarek
Jul 13th, 2006
02:16:17 PM
BEES?!?! Beowulf Stabs the Dragon in the neck
by CatoTheCensor
Jul 13th, 2006
02:44:37 PM
Re: Tucson
by ripper t. jones
Jul 13th, 2006
04:16:39 PM
Tour de force? More like a tour de farce!
by Engineer_at_peac
Jul 13th, 2006
04:53:11 PM
Thanks Bryce.
by Teamwak
Jul 13th, 2006
07:05:26 PM
I know it and hate it
by Lost Prophet
Jul 14th, 2006
03:32:38 AM

Quick Talkback

Please login to post talkback.