Hey, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab.

Haven’t heard a word about this one until now. Let’s see what this guy thought of Dimension’s upcoming horror film THEY...

Metrojoe here with a review of Dimension's latest attempt at jump starting the horror genre, the awkwardly titled THEY. The last Dimension film I saw was "Halloween: Resurrection" (originally titled "Homecoming") and we all know what a piece of crap that film is.

The film starts off promising with rather creative opening credits (a fuzzy image of a little girl sleeping with creepy sounds and things) and a stellar opening sequence. Unfortunately, it seems that after "Scream" reintroduced the opening sequence as fifteen minutes worth focusing on, these filmmakers have completely thrown themselves into making them so good that the rest of the film lacks any creativity or energy. This is sadly the case with THEY.

Julia Lund (Laura Regan, from "Unbreakable") is a psychology student whose life is disrupted by the suicide of a childhood friend (played Jon Abrahams of "Scary Movie") who is convinced that creatures from their youth are coming back for them. Julia of course tries to attribute his suicide with instability, but when she meets two of his college friends at his funeral, she changes her tune. It seems that these friends have been suffering severe relapses of their childhood night terrors, the same ones that drove Julia's friend to suicide, the same ones that Julia herself is beginning to experience again. Throw in some strange flesh wounds that appear on all three of them (Ethan Embry and Dagmara Dominczyk play Abrahams' friends), Julia's idiot, macho boyfriend (Marc Blucas) and some screeching monsters we never get a good look at and you have THEY.

The acting is pretty crummy, but that could be the fault of a weak script. Director Robert Harmon does a good job when it comes to the jumps and jolts (there are plenty) and the film does produce some genuine scares. However, the film's conclusion, which could have been pretty cool, is reduced to an ambiguous blob of nonsense. I don't want to give away much, but I will say that there are two possible explanations for the movie's conclusion. Instead of choosing one and going somewhere with it, the filmmakers chose to go with both and left a whole gaggle of loose ends. There's no real character development and the few attempts at humor fall flat.

If the film is reworked a bit, there's a possibility of it being saved from being complete garbage. As it stands now, however, it's basically a shoddy cross between "A Nightmare on Elm Street" and "Tremors." Yeah, that's right. "Tremors." I know, I know...

A cross between A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and TREMORS?

I can’t even figure out how that would work. I guess we’ll have to see if this is going to get a release soon, or if it’s going to go the IMPOSTER route with reshoots and delays. Neither would surprise me from the House of Bob.

"Moriarty" out.