There_will_be_Dickblood

As far as homage handles go, it's pretty funny.

I wonder who it is that stole that log in from me.

And fuck Turdmen the directors cut. I bet it's still dull as ditchwater.

Who on earth would want to watch MORE of that shit?

I have no idea who the mysterious GIANT PIG is either. I don't think it's someone in the CoC.

On the plus side, this is a fucking superb idea:

"An aged RoboCop/Murphy cast out to police the crime-ridden outskirts of Old Detroit that ring the shining beacon of Delta City, facing obsoletion/possible termination. This would naturally ignore the events of RoboCop 2 and 3 and the emotional aspects might be right up Aronofsky's alley. I also don't think this should be an attempt at a new franchise, but the final resolution to Peter Weller's character. And don't bring in his son/wife like the cheesey series and Prime Directives tried to do. I want a movie about a antique cyborg completely alone in the world, facing the end of his life, and one last great battle."

It seems kind of obvious.

if they want to make a sequel, fine. but if they are going to take the core concept of frankenstein / americanised religion, I'd love to see a robot that discovers that it was human, and died, and then remembers something else he can't explain, a tree of life, being torn from a resting place...

either would be cool.

http://is.gd/1cXgr

http://is.gd/1cXhw

http://tinyurl.com/5cnak7

http://tinyurl.com/n3dfqm

Fuckers!

And it is the IT monkey shithead drippy fucking whores that prevent my wasting away the work day here.

Muthafuckers.

Julianne Moore ... Hilary Clinton, Maybe.

I say Dennis Quaid needs to kick some fucking ass in Jurassic Park 4.

Wife and I did the counseling thing and decided to split up. So that's a bitch of a time.

Burnt myself out building the AIBN site so now I have to find the desire to start contributing again. I'm tired all the f'n time.

Surprisingly I haven't turned to booze. Yet.

A laugh out loud disaster flick? Sign me up!

If I do the double I reckon I'll have a 50/50 chance of living, but there's only a 5% chance of that.

Fuck Hawaiian, sorry to hear that dude. Fuck!

Seriously, though, I'm sorry to hear things haven't been going well for you HOD. Things will look up soon, I hope.

I'm sick as shit about hearing her whine and complain about how no one wants to work with her and no one returns her calls, and "oh man, tv work is soooo hard," while also going out and partying every night and ruining her life. Fuck off, you've squandered everything good you had going for you.

Linds needs to go on Celebrity Rehab.

Also wouldn't he know that The Hurt Locker is only coming out in like two cities, would he really even give a shit about that movie, worrying that it would take away from any transformers money?

He's also a pussy vegetarian marmalade eating bear so didn't kill anyone.

What he does do, is crawl into bed with ironic and then gently spoon him. Ironic strokes his fur afterwards.

And 300? Really? Is that really necessary? NO!

And just shit he says doesn't add up. He thinks Transformers are the first fully CG title characters in a live action film? King Kong? Garfield? There are others...he would know that.

and saying, "only naughty robots hump legs, and some of the robots in this movie are very very naughty"

Then showing up in the Hurt Locker TB telling people "SEE BOTH!" No fucking way. I don't buy it.

Travel is. Get yourself on a plane somewhere and have a fucking blast. One of the people I work with is going through the same shit.

Lacey is my pretty flower, and she and I will *mumbles to himself*

Though I do think that Nodiggity guy pushing Drag Me To Hell all last week probably worked for the studio that made it.

Twat.

And I know he's impotent because you're father told me. Hur-de-fucking-hur.

Sooty is another little bitch, but sweep is a demented motherfucker, and you know for a fact that he savagely cornholed that panda using matthew corbett as a contraceptive.

its like a romantic comedy.

He's a "writer". What else does he have to do besides think up convoluted stories and dick around on the internet?

The second half was to Ironic and his shit bear fixation- they're all rubbish british kids tv shit.

you let us down, bruno.

Also, I'd like to sleep with her.

" I want to apologize to good friends. Tom Davis came over to the house. He drove up from Beaufort. And he has been an incredibly dear friend for a very long time."

"And so I, in a very profound way, have let down the Tom Davises of the world."

"I hurt you all. I hurt my wife. I hurt my boys. I hurt friends like Tom Davis."

"You know, I'm committed to that process of walking through with Jenny, the boys, with the Tom Davises of the world, with the people of South Carolina, in -- in saying where do we go from here."

"I suspect if I'd really put this other person first, I wouldn't have jeopardized her life, as I have. I certainly wouldn't have done it to my wife. I wouldn't have done it to my boys. I wouldn't have done it to the Tom Davises of the world."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

this isn't wanking in bangkok. now on to that other joke, which is less cruel...

The correct term would be either rectal or Colon, although Colon isn't actually anal.

This is strange.

http://tinyurl.com/l9getd

A itching, searing sensation in the ringpiece that eventually results in brain death.

Lohan on the other hand is spoiled shit, and then some. She's nearing Amy Winehouse territory with every passing day.

But Lacey Chabert......... mmmmmmmm hmmmmmm!!! What a fine specimen of former jailbait! She is fucking stunning in every way, and totally outclasses her former Party costars Neve And Hewitt.

And Melyssa Ford is one of those girls who's only famous for her ass being displayed in hip hop magazines, just like Buffy the Body, Melissa Reign and the lovely Bria Myles.

Plus the dramatic midget is back.

I did not care for the first one at all.

Well actually that isn't entirely accurate...you see..I think this film.....may....have....conver ted me. Like others here I never thought Megan Fox was hot and always said she looked manish, also she has those gross tattoos, but this film has me convinced she is fucking hot. Maybe its the way they shot her/him but fuck....there is no way you won't want to do any number of awful things with her once you see the film and that includes Mike and Danny.. She/he runs in slow motion half the movie and her tits immediately grab your attention. So anyway skip this movie for your own good. You'll leave with a headache and questioning your sexuality.

Dammit! I have to agree with Danny on Death at a Funeral.

THE BALES OF MADISON COUNTY;

She sat at the end of the bed, the sheet barely clinging to her naked body. She looked up at him, her eyes pleading with him to stay.

“Why?” she finally asked, her voice filled with hurt and pain.

DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD didn’t reply. He stood at the open window, looking out at the lights of Paris at night. He took another long drag from his cigarette before finally turning to face her.

“You wouldn’t understand, baby. I don’t know if I understand it myself. But we just wouldn’t work out.”

“Why?” she repeated, tears building up in her eyes. “I love you. Don’t you love-“

DICKBLOOD cut her off in mid-sentence. “Don’t ask questions to things you don’t really want to know the answer to.”

“Why don’t you love me? Aren’t I beautiful?”

DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD sighed, sat down on the bed next to her. “Let me put it in words you can understand, baby. My lights were trashed. Ok? I walked into someone’s eyeline and they just trashed my lights. And nothing is going to put them up again.”

She studied him for a moment, than said, “This is because of Bale, isn’t it.”

“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING??” BGDB screamed. “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THEENK YOU ARE DOING? WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? DO YOU KNOW HOW DISTRACTING YOU ARE?”

She started to cry then, tears flowing down her cheeks. DGBD shook his head, and then pulled her towards him.

“I’m sorry baby. You’re right. Bale is involved. But I am not doing this because of him.”

“Then why?” she asked through her tears.

“Because you are an amateur, and I am a PROFESSIONAL. You’re just ah-da-da-dah, like this in the background. You're a nice guy. You're a nice guy, but that don't fuckin’ cut it when you're fuckin’ around like this on set.”

His words cut into her like knives and she lowered her head. He could hear sobbing escape her. “I’m sorry, but I am done with you professionally.”

She looked up and him, her eyes wet and her lips moist with desire. “Please, just kiss me one last time, “ she begged him, as she dropped the sheet to reveal her beautiful body. “Just kiss me like before.”

DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD leaned over, closed his eyes kissed her. She felt her head growing light with ecstasy.

Little did she know that he was thinking of Bale the entire time.

That said, I enjoyed the first one for what it was, but this one is pretty fucking shitty.

95% of it is sound and fury. It just doesn't bother to stop for more than 1 minute. Like we've got ADHD or something. There is WAY too many fight scenes and WAY too many Decepticons that look exactly then same. And some of the effects looked worse than in the first one. The twins especially sometimes looked like they moved with that shuddery stop motion effect.

And *SPOILER* what's with the decepticon that can transform into human form? WTF?

The story makes so little sense and is so fucking meaningless it's embarrassing.

There were moments that I quite enjoyed. Mainly from Shia's mum. And Turturro was amusing. I'm not sure why Ebert singled him out as having an embarrasing role. He was fine. Both those characters provided some chuckles. It's hackneyed humour, but in this flick it's welcomed in between the unrelenting bashing and crashing. Megan Fox looks pretty hot. Why the fuck she'd stay with Shia is beyond me.

I like Bay. I enjoy most of his flicks in one way or another. Sometimes it's because he just doesn't give a fuck what you think about them. He has the balls to make every female on the college campus smoking hot, have a frat party look like it's a Vegas nightclub and lavish the camera's attention on women running and jiggling in slow motion. But fuck me. I wish he'd tone it down just a bit. And he makes horrendous choices, such as stopping cold in the middle of an action scene to attempt unfunny humour. It just breaks the scene and takes you out of it.

So in all it was not the disaster everyone is saying it is. It's not the nail in the coffin of the blockbuster like Ebert is saying it is. But if you have no love for the first one, steer well fucking clear of this one.

..almost.

I was more upset with Bruce about repeatedly lying about shit....like not knowing what it would be rated. And he became such a pussy, saying McClane didn't smoke because he quit smoking and he thinks its a filthy habit?!! FUCK YOU.

It just left me a little underwhelmed is all.

In this version, Simon has double-crossed most of his accomplices, gotten the loot to a safe hiding place (Nova Scotia), and has the gold turned into statuettes of a famous landmark (in this case the Empire State Building) in order to smuggle it out of the country; but he is still tracked down to his foreign hideaway. This is very similar to Alec Guinness's situation in the British heist movie The Lavender Hill Mob made some 45 years earlier in which the stolen gold is turned into Eiffel Tower paperweights.

McClane is keen to take his problems out on Simon whom he invites to play a game called "McClane Says". This involves a form of Russian Roulette with a small Chinese rocket launcher with the sights removed, meaning it cannot be determined which end is which. McClane then asks Simon some riddles similar to the ones he played in New York. When Simon gets a riddle wrong, McClane forces him at gunpoint to fire the launcher, which fires the rocket through Simon, killing him. Of course, McClane had been wearing a flak jacket (which was the answer to the final riddle "what could he have brought to the meeting to save his life?"), so even if Simon had pointed the launcher the right way, it's likely that the relatively low-velocity rocket wouldn't have caused McClane enough injury to prevent him from shooting Simon.

In the DVD audio commentary, screenwriter Jonathan Hensleigh claims that this version was dropped because the studio thought it showed a more cruel and menacing side to McClane, a man who killed for revenge rather than in self-defense. Hensleigh's intention was to show that the events in New York and the subsequent repercussions had tilted him psychologically. This alternative ending, set some time after the main events of the movie, would have marked a serious break from the Die Hard formula, in which the plot unfolds over a period of roughly 12 hours.

But I think Liotta is a great B-actor at times, like a modern day Richard Conti or even more like Richard WIdmark. He is at his best when he plays characters that are just barely staying afloat. He was really good in this small neo-noir called Phoenix. Not the greatest movie, but he plays a great character.

And I could NEVER figure out the water in the bottle thing. One day after like 7th viewing or something, I *finally* had it solved.

Then, the next time I saw the movie, I had promptly forgotten it too.

Liotta's great at playing characters that are right on the tipping point. Just completely desperate and raw. Like in Copland.

I said "King of Pedophiles?"

And right now, it looks like that 3rd death might be Michael Jackson.

It is has been quite a while since Fred has seen you 'live'. How is the rabittses chasing coming along?

BBC reports him going to hospital but not dead - though they do mention TMZ's information.

Get yourself on Skype, if you haven't already. Maybe we can work out a video conference with Mavra!

Ciao.

Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, AND Michael Jackson? These are the pillars upon which present-day America was built!

http://tinyurl.com/ndrjkx

Just click the screen!

Although that being an AICN obit TB and with the pure grade A idjits that post on AICN I guess you don't really need any specific reason to be a used jock sniffing douche bag, right?

Course, they still had to have "Sway" pop up between each video (prerecorded) and explain that Michael Jackson is dead. You know, for all the idiot teenagers that change the channel to MTV and wonder "Why the fuck is MTV playing music videos?!?"

Now "Billie Jean" and "Man in the Mirror" were much better videos IMO. Maybe not as flashy, but much more powerful and poignant (especially "Man in the Mirror").

Just my two cents.

And the other thing everybody takes the fact you don't like the same movie as them as some sort of personal attack. I said I thought The Transformers was stupid, I didn't say you were. But your comments make me think otherwise.

Plus its got Vincent Price.

You've got a 5 litre bottle and a 3 litre bottle (or gallons, whatever).

You need 4 litres exactly in the five litre bottle.

Fill the 3 litre bottle and pour into the 5 litre. This gives 3 litres exactly.

Fill again and pour into the five litre bottle. This gives 5 litres in the 5 litre and 1 litre in the 3 litres.

Pour out 5 litre bottle.

Pour contents of 3 litre bottle into 5 litre- leaving 1 litre in the 5 litre bottle

Fill 3 litre bottle and pour into 5 litre bottle- giving 4 litres exactly.

It isn't this precise, and is frankly bullshit- you can estimate it near enough.

Thriller is an amazing video, for it's time. Fuck, I have no idea what music videos are like these days, but I bet they're shithouse.

Is anyone going to give a fuck when Jonathan King or Gary Glitter kick it? There certainly won't be this revolting wailing and gnashing of teeth.

Fuck him "King of Pop" if pop= popping pubescent boys' anal virginity.

hehehehehehe

Don't blame me for societies failings!

The only female sport I enjoy watching is beach volleyball.

And it isn't my fault that the men are shit while the women are world champions in every version of the sport. I bet the women's side could beat the men.

The only real difference may be in fast bowling, but seeing as England will persist with low 80mph shit you may as well play the bird.

Women's rugby is the worst. Beasts, all of them.

Did you enjoy turd trek?

Bastard.

Too bad about Whacky Jax. He apparently liked his Xanax and painkillers too much.

Droid isn't a limey- he's a dirty kangaroo-shagging convict bastard.

That's pretty wrong that one.

Ferguson will still be playing Giggs in August.

I want to see all these hypocritical douchebags in Polanski's obit. Bull-fucking shit.

I don't get this, because he could dance and did some good music OVER 20 FUCKING YEARS AGO he couldn't have possibly been abusing kids.

*poke*

hehe

Or FLAMING LEG KICKS! Or unleash THE GIANT PIG on them.

Fearsome.

And fuck right off with that "innocent until proven guilty" shit. He's the kiddie-fiddling equivalent of OJ.

Guilty. As. Fuck.

*poke*

hehe

Thanks for all the well wishes guys. But life is actually sort of good right now. Maybe not for long if lawyers become involved but I'm spending insane amounts of time with my dad and brother drinking home brew and watching soccer and it's awesome. Also spending time with the girl who brings me lattes. Her heart it turns out is as big as her breasts. Terrific gal. And most importantly, spending more time than ever with my daughter. So I'm in a good place at the moment.

DH3 is a pretty great movie save for the end. But they were headed to Nova Scotia so I forgive it. I saw that in a theater in Halifax and when they mention Nova Scotia the audience erupted. Much as they did at the beginning of Hunt For Red October when the map/text scroll thingy shows the sub off the coast of Nova Scotia.

I'd love to get out to see a movie this weekend but it's nothing but crap out there right now.

Maybe there's something on the tubes. Watched Knowing last weekend and it was a terrific movie for 2/3s and then it got ridonculous for me and fell apart. So I'm hoping to see something big and loud that delivers all the way through.

Almost noon and I could use a beer.

Which was an AWESOME little town. I love the Shoe Shop restaurant/bar. That place was great. I'd love to visit it again.

http://www.youtube.com/watc h?v=cXRhmtSU7_c

Vader, I spent 17 years in Halifax so half of my life. The other half here in North Carolina.

And yes, the Economy Shoe Shop on Argyle Street is a great place. They have live jazz there during the summer and it's my favorite place to be.

Trailer Park Boys is shot across the harbor in Dartmouth. A stone's throw away from where I went to school. There's a episode where they're stealing shopping carts from a mall parking lot right in front of a men's suit store. That store was my first job in high school.

Latte Girl is awesome. She now brings me beer and expensive port. And I bring her lunch everyday. And she wants to go to Panther games with me so that's a huge bonus.

This isn't quite the same thing as Polanski, who pretty much admitted his guilt and fled. This is a case of people latching on to media reports and speculation based on accusations and a payoff. Its not quite the same thing as admitted guilt or a conviction.

After dinner we went downstairs, had a few post-dinner drinks, and watched an underground hip hop group made of mostly white guys perform. We had a great time.

Latte girl sounds great. You bring her lunch now? Sounds like something could be blossoming...

Go Panthers! I had a dream last night about buying season tickets, thinking they were cheap and I had the money. I'm glad it was a dream bc something tells me its a stupid idea and I'd never be able to afford it.

I'm not a big fan of jumping to conclusions based on assumptions. I mean, does anyone here ever remember the McMartin preschool trail? People who worked in a preschool were all charged with molesting kids and it turned out to be the biggest witch hunt ever. People's lives were ruined because of the accusation of being child molesters. So I am always a little cautious about saying that someone is a molester - you just don't really know.

HOWEVER, with Michael I do hold several things against him. One of which is that here is a man who has no kids but builds a amusement part in his yard AND ADMITS to sharing a bed with children. Maybe he didn't molest kids but he did have an unhealthy relationship with them. A relationship that makes it quite a logical jump to wonder if this guy is maybe doing more than just playing patty cake with them. I think there is nothing wrong with people suspicious of him and saying "Hey, sorry, but we don't consider this to be appropriate behavior of an adult male in our society, and by acting this way you make us think that maybe something is wrong with you."

So in conclusion, I think it is strong to say for certain he was a child-molester of pedophile but I don't think it is wrong to say "Great musician, but he always rubbed me wrong - especially when I was at Neverland as a kid."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wik i/Little_Rascals_Day_Care_Cent er

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/D ay_care_sex_abuse_hysteria

We were afraid many residents would think we were somehow capitalizing on their incident, especially with lines like "Just what do you think he's doing with those two boys? That's what I wanna know..." even though the relationship was completely harmless. He just gave them an old camera and they took pictures of him. Daiii mean, FOR him.

Seriously the more and more I read about how people were born into movies, the more I realize that it just wasn't meant to be.

Action is the only TRUTH. if you did it once you've done it at least a dozen times. So in conclusion for the last time FUCK HIM HE'S A CHILD RAPIST.

HOWEVER, I do know he acted inappropriately again and again. As you said he has a PATTERN of documented BEHAVIOR. And while I am not going to go to the length of saying I know for certain that he is an actual molester I will say he did enough things wrong to make me suspicious and hold it against him.

Maybe Strom Thurmond was never a member of the Klan, and I would never make a statement that "Strom was a Klansman", but there is enough evidence for me to say "Man, I wouldn't doubt that Strom was a Klansman."

Subtle difference maybe, but to me an important distinction.

Nor would I lump his supporters into the same category for simply not believing the accusations.

Though I am glad I hear less and less about people just going to hollywood and making it. I just read that how J Deep did it.

Now I am not holding it again them, but I always think they should recognize how lucky they were to have access to information and equipment that the rest of us could only dream off. Not to play the "poor me" card, but I had to learn how to edit by reading the manual and staying late a Concorde/New Horizon so I could get a chance to tinker around, while sleeping in my car because I was working as an unpaid intern/PA.

But I'm not bitter or anything.

"As someone who served as Michael Jackson's publicist during the 1st child molestation incident, I must confess I am not surprised by today's tragic news.

Michael has been on an impossibly difficult and often self-destructive journey for years. His talent was unquestionable but so too was his discomfort with the norms of the world.

A human simply can not withstand this level of prolonged stress.”

You can still be a fan and mourn him etc for all I care, it's a free world. Even Billy Martin got a decent obit, and he was nothing if not a nasty abusive drunk and then some, you know? But a great manager nonetheless.

Never been over to Halifax, though grew up just a few minutes from the New Brunswick line. It just wasn't on my radar screen to be honest. We always headed for Bangor or S of there you know?

Now THAT is how you write a review! Take some fucking notes Harry!

The only Ultraviolet worth mentioning is the Milla Jovovich movie!

Yes I'm only saying this to piss you all off, so dont bother with the insults. But it was a great movie.

I saw her on some talk show yesterday; I think it was live with Regis and William Shatner, and they showed a clip from the movie. When it came back, Regis was talking about the clip, the audience was cheering, and Fox said something like "oh look, I got some screentime finally," or something to that effect.

Its not out and out dissing the films that gave her fame, like that Katherine Heigl biatch did with "Knocked Up", but it still strikes me as weird. Its like she's trying to distance herself from these films to prove she *can* act, hoping she'll get some more roles in the future, but I feel like the best way you can do that is to.... well, act better and go to more auditions to prove you're capable.

You could easily argue that cinema, as an artform, has all been leading up to this. It will destabilize your limbic system, probably forever, and make you doubt the solidity of your surroundings. Generations of auteurs have struggled, in vain, to create a cinematic experience as overwhelming, and as liberating, as ROTF."

She's done two movies and she's everywhere like she's the greatest actress on Earth.

http://tinyurl.com/mua7hw

Hell, I want to see Bay fight her.

Yeah, I am sick but the image of her just pounding on Megan Fox brings me joy. And not joy in my man parts ether, just a kind of euphoria at knowing that this would prove there is karma in the universe.

http://tinyurl.com/kkkgjn

"so i wnet to a barfirst off all and the bar is got lots of collage kids in there and one girl is real hot but wehn she speeks she say " its my tuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurn " like that becase she is is playing pool and her voise is so annyoing and i thinkshe is is not hot anymore .aslo she is with guyswith big hairstlyes who were idoits!"

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Read this fucking review. I'm not kidding, it's a slice of solid gold.

Going to watch Twitch trailers now - in a huff...

Unfortunately, YouTube won't play the fucking video, something to do with me being in the UK. Piss off then, YouTube.

Will look out for Meds.

I' m guessing Transformers and Twilight are thier realms.

What I was trying to say is that Placebo's Meds is a great album. I also like the new one, Battle for the Sun. I have to download their previous ones, or at least their greatest hits one.

That was back when I actually followed and care about music. Music sucks now, thank god MJ is all over the radio, finally something worth listening to.

Yea, that made sense.

Love me some Pixies. They're one of my favorite bands.

You know what's a great song and no one would ever know/think of it? "Pray For the Girls" by Frank Black from the Powerpuff Girls soundtrack. Its FUCKING AWESOME and highly recommended.

She's 17.

I don't think she ever looked better.

I think so.

We may be in the midst of the dreaded Nine-Dead-Celebrity-Wave. This can only get worse from here. No one is safe.

Whoooooooooo!!!!!!!

2) If petergrifin is just a fraud, someone who is pretending he doesn't know how to spell, well good for him. Of course, I doubt pity was this person's desired result and after awhile he will get bored and stop posting as petergrifin.

3) Now, if petergrifin is sincere, and that is his normal level of thought and spelling and grammar ability, than I really believe that he is mentally handicapped to a certain degree. And if that is the case, I see nothing wrong with making someone who is obviously less fortunate than the rest of us feel better about himself.

I have no problem ripping into Script Girl or Bob Orci or some TBer who is being a douchebag, but I draw the line at making fun or ridiculing someone who might very well suffer from a mental disorder or who has a developmental disability. Plus, when how often on a TB can you do a "good deed" and make someone less fortunate than you feel good?

Warning to the rest of the world - a country that calls the sport "soccer" instead of "football" might soon be a force to reckon with.

It's a Mikey Bay movie, AKA Big Robots Hitting Each Other One More Time.

Don't go see it if you didn't the like the first one, but---it's about the same in quality, seems to me. I liked it.

He's got that right.

Good effort though - and a superb win against Spain in the semi.

Fuck I was hoping the drive in was showing Drag me to Heck tonight again, but they are not. Damnit.

But I liked it. It's certainly NOT the worst of the big summer movies-Angels and Demons, for example, and Terminator IV, I thought this was better, and as for Trek-that I enjoyed more than TF II, sure. Ditto Up.

Stuff like Land of the Lost, Year One and GI Jose there look like shitfests even I will avoid.

And Eli Roth will steal the idea.

I am almost 100% certain he isn't Frankenheimer's kid but Don Simpson's.

FUCK THAT SHIT!!!

On an unrelated note, a commercial for the "Street Fighter" DVD just played on tv, and I swear I heard Ryu's old "Hadoken!" sound bite from the video game. WTF was that doing there? IS that how they're going to try and sell the film? By reminding Street Fighter fans that their favorite character isn't in this movie?

Oh yeah watched Phobe In Wonderland, don't bother it sucked, though I don't think this was on anyone's list of movies to see.

Glengary Glen Ross, save for the Alec Baldwin part the whole thing just felt so PLAY to me, yeah I know its a play but its was so obvious a play. It was ok and all, reminded me of In the Company of Men (which I guess steals from it seeing as that it came second) but I liked Company better. I just was expected something more.

The Cars That Ate Paris, what a weird fucking movie. Not weird crazy, just weird odd, also weird that they main guy from Mad Max (which is on this week! Get to see it again since like forever) has had such a long ass career, he was the Trainman in Matrix 2: Die Harder.

Tom Cruise Nazi movie, it was well done and all. There was just nothing there. They try to kill Hitler, think they do, realize they didn't the end. Maybe they should have just made up their own story, would have been a lot more fun. But it was good stuff, like a more traditional War Film in the sense. I think everyone did a great job, the story just wasn't there.

Phobe In Wonderland, Girl has weird form of turrets, and that is a spoiler. That's all the fucking movie was. Me and my lady friend were trying to remember what we saw that made her want to see it.

"We beat Spain and Brazil".

Woops! No you didn't. But 1 out of 2 ain't bad. Good effort.

PS- this is the worst Brazil side, ever. Mrs. Jarv's brother periodically sends me emails that I'm pretty certain constitute little more than death threats against Dunga for playing 2 holding midfield players.

Bullshit, says I.

I would say it feels more like the zion scenes in Matrix. Thankfully without the drum n bass dance scene.

Ended up getting a taxi at Euston fucking Road.

That sort of shit ruins a night.

Even if only 25% of the US has any interest or background playing the game, that still gives us a pool of 75 million to get players from. And the UK only has a pool of 61 million.

Not bragging, but just stating a simple fact. Someday the US will become a serious contender for the World Cup and other football titles. Population and demographics alone says it will happen.

All varying degrees of genius. Damn impressive streak that one.

Unspeakably awful

Conti- No point comparing us to the US in football. We suck and are probably worse than the US.

I would point out though, that the sporting culture outside of the US is totally different- by the time your players get drafted our lot have already been professional for as much as 5 years and got invaluable experience way before their American counterparts.

It probably will happen at some stage, but there will be some fucking big nations in the way.

but the uk arn't any good at soccer. even australia beat them last time we played. and we have no respect for the game whatsoever.

We're getting a lot better, and are now regarded as one of the top 10 sides in the world. Which is about right- but we'll always lose when it matters.

England have been worryingly good recently. It's most unlike them, and the Under 21's look really good.

That's literally what happened in the last world cup when I England lost to Portugal. I was in a pub watching it, the final whistle went and about three fights immediately broke out.

Hilarious.

*sigh*

But trust me its easier to get around the British chube and the german rail system (and I don't even speak German) then it is to get around the New York train system.

Also its a pain in the ass to get around Holland as well, they don't even mark the damn underground train stations.

GIANT PIG!!!

He did write Blues Brothers 2000 and direct that, though. Maybe that's where I got confused.

Heh, and he directed the Beverly Hills Cop movie with the random as hell George Lucas cameo.

Though I suppose it would be okay as a sci-fi original movie.

Other than that, wasted my time watching the Mets get Destroyed by the Yanks. Fucking pathetic.

This is shit I don't need to hear about.

Nobody's getting pissy, they're just trying to tell him it's short for "sawbones", another word for doctor, or surgeon.

Yeh, it's very clever what O&K came up with to explain the 'Bones' nickname. But is it really because they didn't expect anyone nowadays would know what the term "sawbones" pertains to?

The same was probably true for Droid.

I'm going to the park in lunch.

Bones has so many different medical connotations, was it really needed to fix on one and then explain it?

Anyone think it would have been a good idea to keep the fact that Kainan was from space from the audience until he tells the story about what they did to the Moorwen? Up until that point they could have easily concealed it and made it look as if he was just some foreigner and then just leave some clues. Then when he tells the story we finally see where he's from in flashback form. Think it would have been neat.

I love moments like this,

Harry is a dick for undersupporting it.

Work is atrocious at the moment. Hence the disappearing act yesterday.

And it fucking sucks getting here on the tube. Sweating like a rapist on trial all the way to work.

Just some silly cunt had taught them to walk on 2 legs.

BTW Hauritz is the worst fucking player I've seen in a baggy green in a long time.

Bad News= they won't play them.

This is very irritating.

And let Mitchell Johnson do the rest! hehe

Monty= meh, Swann= Good, Rashid= Potentially fucking brilliant.

I agree though, they won't play Hauritz.

And his bowling ain't that fucking good anymore either.

Work is a right bastard today.

That's bad.

Shouldn't there be a DVD column today? God Harry is such a slacker.

It's about 9 hours long as well or at least it feels like it.

Awful shit. Pig ugly women and when Samantha said that she was going to fuck the neighbour because she wanted to, and that she was only staying with the guy that nursed her through chemo because he nursed her through chemo I nearly puked. What made it worse was that the other women were fucking telling her to dump him because she'd put on a bit of weight.

I was fast-forwarding it every time Mrs. Jarv left the room, and it is, without a shadow of a doubt the most wank film I've seen this year.

I would rather watch a super elongated directors cut with PIRATE nonsense version of Turdmen than sit through that heinous crap again.

Best I've seen this year previously never seen....

Hard Rock Zombies - near perfection in hilarity...seriously, Hitler, midget who eats himself...Red Cliff pt 1 - loved it and the character interaction....Space Mutiny - another classically bad movie, with the "chase" scene a particular standout in my mind....Death Sentence - holds a warm spot in my heart, thanks Kevin!...Mongol - thought this was a pretty solid film.

If The Bates could not withstand my lord, what chance does a GIANT PIG have?

The greatest actor of our lives, Chris Klein was WAS! going to star in the upcoming Oscar bait movie Town Creek directed by stated above director. It could have been a cinema match made in heaven.

Now it stars the dumb brother from Prison Break. But it is still directed by the man behind the Wiz, so it'll be genius.

Wa-hoo!

Carnage will ensue.

I ain't scared of no stinking pig, GIANT, MASSIVE, or otherwise.

Hmmm...GIANT PORK on the grill.

I think they still should have made it.

It's difficult typing in a sarky manner, doesn't translate sometimes...

I thought the same thing. Would've been good to see a viking POV and them trying to work out where this guy is from, along with the audience.

Good flick though...

Thank you, Constable.

He's no BringingSexyBack, that's for sure, who may be my favorite Talkbacker for all the random comments he peppers into the middle of intense debates.

LBL is an attention seeking nutcase waaaaay off it's meds. The best thing to do is ignore the idiotic pus bag because among it's many faillings LBL has zero taste and is a low fuctioning paste and dirt eating mongoloid.

The man is a taint on AICN. And I don't mean taint as in "taint on history", I mean literally the spot between your nutsack and your asshole. Just a fucking taint.

Anytime you have Walter Murch talking about editing I am enraptured.

The only films I can think of that we have left are Public Enemies, Harry Potter, and District 9.

Am I missing anything? If I had to pick between just those 3, I might go with Harry Potter. Why? Well, I don't like Mann's use of digital camera for Public Enemies, and I don't like the advertising campaign selling it as the Johnny Depp show (I want to see more of Bale and Crudup).

District 9 seems like a great idea, and the short film was very entertaining, but there's not enough promotional material to get me excited.

Harry Potter: the director pissed me off bigtime with the last one, and I've heard he's cut out/changed even more events for this film, enough to really make the bookreaders angry... but I'm so interested in the adaptation process (and very eager to hate the director based on the last film), that I really want to see how this movie pans out. It was made after/at the same time as the final book in the series was released, so it'll be interesting to see what the filmmakers decided was important enough to keep and "superficial" enough to cut out- that is, until, they read the final book and realized they'd made a huge mistake.

That's tragic.

Very lame year. Everyone tried to cram their shit into one month (May), and I feel like the only film that was given any room was Bayformers2.

And there is absolutely nothing coming out in August as far as I'm concerned.

No really, I couldn't name one film that comes out in August. Can you? Without looking it up?

I'm more worried about his did GINORMOUS MOTHERFUCKER OF A PIG.

I hear he wreaks havoc wherever his hub cap sized trotters land.

May crap typing meant that I knobbed the joke about GIANT PIG's dad ("did"- d'oh)being GINORMOUS MOTHERFUCKING PIG.

This can run and run.

And at this rate, I may never end up seeing the remake.

The queen zombie/ posessed kid is an outstanding piece of design and it's the only horror film in fucking yonks that I actually jumped in.

8/10

I have however seen 131 movies for the first time this year.

The problem is, to do 500, I've got to watch any old bollocks that is on TV- and a lot of the time I haven't seen them and they suck something fierce. Most of the Wank ones are ones I've never seen before.

In honour of that- top 10 mint/ wank for 2009 so far:

Hard Rock Zombies.

The Thing

Die Hard

Evil Dead 2

Blue Collar,

In Bruges

Red Cliff 2

Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind

Taxi Driver

I notice you put down Blue Collar and Taxi Driver, both written by Paul Schrader. Well so are the two I just mentioned (and Hardcore was also directed by Schrader and stars George C. Scott AND is about pornography!).

2)2 Days in Paris: fucking horrid ego driven attempt to recapture the magic of Before Sunset. Dismal.

3)Die You Zombie Bastards: I want everyone involved in this to die. For producing such a load of wank and wasting a great title.

4)Dr. Doolittle 3: The sequel so shit that even Eddie "cash in" Murphy turned it down.

5)Garfield: A Tale of 2 Kitties- awful tripe.

6)I Know Who Killed Me: Alternatively entitled- I don't have a fucking clue why I killed my own career.

7)Shrooms: My christ this was shit. Avoid like Michael Moore avoids honesty and objectivity

8)Basic Instinct 2- Risk Addiction: Fucking festering load of wank.

9)The Animal: Rob Schneider is a cunt

10)Watchmen.

4) Red Cliff 2

5)In Bruges

6) OUTLANDER

7)Ip Man

8)Return of the Living Dead

9)Rec

10)Persepolis

This is in no particular order.

I'm basically self-taught. I used to be a video store clerk (before the Army and after, how sad is that?) and I also used to check out every movie at the school library I could. But my big film "education" was here in LA. I used to work in the vault at Corman's as an intern for a little bit, so I basically saw every Roger Corman film he owned on 3/4. Plus I went to every festival and revival I could.

I think the second year I was here they had the Warner Brothers 75th Anniversary festival at the Mann's Chinese Theatre. 10 Warner Bros. movies a day, each day representing a different decade. I skipped work and lived on popcorn, soda and milk duds for a week.

Ichi the Killer, definitely not. The Proposition, I need another viewing of to finalize my opinion.

I've practically forgotten all the summer "blockbusters" that have come out already. Wolverine, Trek, Bayformers2... never did see Terminator or Up.

Look into your heart. You know this to be true!

"The french are very upset!"

hehe

I'd say about 80% of the wank ones I've seen this year are new and about 30% of the Mint ones. It's about half and half of the "meh" ones.

I'm pretty sure this was in 1999, after I'd gone to the NC School of the Arts for a summer session in filmmaking bc I distinctly remember it being in a post-Columbine environment where theaters here in NC wouldn't allow anyone under 18 to attend R-rated films. Which pissed off all of us 17 year olds that summer at film school, bc we'd always been brought up to believe a rated R film meant you had to be 17, NOT 18, to see it. So a lot of us missed out on seeing American Pie and Kubrick's Eyes Wide Shut that summer.

Anyhoo, a small version of WB's film fest came to Charlotte, and A Clockwork Orange was part of the lineup. I didn't know much about it, but practically made my mom take me to see it (since they wouldn't let 17 yr old me buy a ticket for myself).

And boy was I embarrassed. I knew there'd be rape and violence and nudity, but man I don't think I've ever felt as awkward and self-conscious while watching a movie with my mother than I did sitting next to her as A Clockwork Orange played.

Thankfully, she fell asleep in the midst of the movie. Good times.

The problem is if I'm just mooching around doing nothing in particular then I'll stick whatever film on and I've got a, I suppose, pull list of films I just chill to with a beer.

Not the piddling "Of course they are!"

Usually seen wearing a backpack. Or serving beer.

1. Knowing

LTROI

3. Tremors

4. The Hurt Locker

5. Midnight Run

6. The Thing

7. The Big Lebowski

8. The Vanishing (original)

9. To Kill A Mockingbird

10. Best In Show

11. Say Anything

Had to go to 11 because Say Anything fucking rules.

2) Let the Right One In

3) Police Python 357

4) Coup de Torchon

5) The Sicilian Clan

6) Wild Boys of the Road

7) Alias Nick Beal

8) The American Connection

9) The Hangover

10) Up

I actually haven't seen that many movies this year as I normally do. To quote Troy McCluire "I've been reading a lot of scripts. It's cheaper than going to the movies you know."

2. Trannyformers 2

3. Watchmen

4. Sex Drive

5. Fired Up (why do I watch this shit!?)

6. The Incredible Hulk

7. The Uninvited

8. Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus

9. Volcano

10. He's Just Not That Into You

11. Pink Panther 2

12. The Unborn

Concord/New Horizons wasn't like that. They had the same b-movie directors on each film, over and over again. I can understand why economically (they new what to do), but it did rob the joy out of the experience.

Still I got to cut on a Moviola and learn Avid, and learned how to edit without having any real college experience. Plus I wrote skinflicks for guys that worked with Corman. So it was a pretty learning experience in that way.

Also used, the word "NEWT!"

13. The Crow

14. Hulk

15. Stand By Me

16. Synecdoche New York

17. Bullets Over Broadway

18. Ratatouille

19. This is Spinal Tap

20. The Princess Bride

2)Dead and Buried. Brilliant.

3)Midnight Meat Train. I was totally expecting it to be wank. Vinnie Jones for the win.

4)My Name Is Bruce- I thought this was underrated. The first half in particular is hilarious. Much better than I was expecting

5)Rec. Nothing about this was appealing to me. Fast Zombies= Fail. Spanish Zombies= Fail. Jouranlist in Zombie Movie= Fail. Hand Held Camera= Fail. I was so fucking wrong. See it.

6)Persepolis. Worthy Oscar bait about Iran with black and white annoying animation should have been shit. It isn't. It's one of the best animated films I've ever seen.

7)Basket Case 2. I'd not seen this, but had seen BC1 and it's fucking superb. Hilarious, gross and just magical. I'm waiting on Basket Case 1 before I write this one, and it's sequel up

8)Some Kind of Monster. I don't like Metallica, Documentaries about music usually bore me to tears. This one is immense.

9)The Mist. I was all prepared for this one to suck ass, due to the Knowles effect married to Stephen King. I was wrong

10)Crank. Statham+Stupidity+ whatshername that bugs the shit out of me should equal wank. It doesn't.

Usually seen hanging around the duck pond in Regent's Park wearing I heart London T-Shirts and fanny packs ignoring all signs and feeding the fucking flying vermin. Thereby annoying the shit out of me when I'm walking to the pub on Baker Street.

Also spotted sitting at tables in pubs in Camden complaining about the lack of service.

I guess I'm getting jaded in my old age.

REC on the other hand I wwant to see.

2)Sharks in Venice. Should have been awesome. Ruined by stupid sub-par indiana jones plot and fat baldwin

3)Die You Zombie Bastards- Complete sophmoric wank. I'd rather watch Hostel. That's how bad it is.

4)Creepazoids. I should love this, but it's just boring. Linnea Quigly is good in it, and to be honest, I'd definately bounce up and down on her for a while if she asked nicely

5)Eraserhead. Why the fuck do people like this?

6)Mask of the ninja. I was promised Casper Van Diem training as a ninja. Far too much Casper and nowhere near enough Ninja.

7)Rumble Fish. Seminal my ass.

8)All the boys love mandy lane. Great opening, rest of film is dreadful. Too predictable by half.

9)Linhe De Passe. After the incredible Central Station I was expecting something amazing. It was OK, but not worth bothering with really. Watch either City of God or Central Station instead.

10) Lust, CAution. This is officially the last Ang Lee film I will ever watch. I've come to the conclusion that 60% of the time he just bores me, 20% irritates me to the level of killing puppies and 10% makes something I want to see. That ain't good enough.

They don't come across as douchebags, rather talented guys with serious fucking problems. I am amazed at the level of access the film-makers got to the band. It should have been a PR fiasco, instead it's an interesting way to spend a few hours. It isn't really a day with the band, it takes place over a much longer period than that.

I hate that shitty fucking film.

Worse than Godzilla.

Who I usually think is an astronomically lucky cro-magnon twat.

Bradley Cooper is a bag of cocks, but does get hit in the head with a hammer.

The kill scenes aren't groundbreaking, but they aren't torture porn so I give it credit.

The character Vinnie plays is surprisingly intelligently drawn with a focus on professionalism (in a weird OCD way). Sure the last act is a bit skewed, but it was far better than reports suggested it would be.

The Spirit is God, God awful. I make a rule of never fast forwarding or skipping around a movie - I broke it for the Spirit.

Hellride was just bad. Boring and bad.

And yes, they don't come across as douchebags. On the doco I saw they came across as good musicians that were making an album that they were very sure wouldn't work. And Hetfield and Ulrich had major problems with each other.

Anyway, thats a good doco.

All these reports of the Spirit really make me want to watch it.

Spirit was a fucking car wreck. I can't hate it to much though - it felt like it was made by a kid in a football helmet. How do you get upset at someone who is director challenged?

It's interesting.

I would say I hate Trannyformers, but I have only seen about 50% of it so I can't make up an opinion yet if I hate it or just think it sucks.

You have no idea how bad it is. It isn't a chick flick, and it isn't a gay film. It's a horrible selfish cunt film populated with loathsome unlikable twats (the only one with any redeeming features shits herself, thereby becoming minging) behaving like complete fucking twats and being inexplicably rewarded for being complete fucking twats.

It's a hideous denoument of 21st century society and if this is what single women aspire to, then expect to see homosexuality increase. It's horrid.

And yes, I will fucking hate that bag of cocks Frank Miller because although he may be direction challenged, he obviously thinks he's fucking awesome and talented.

Bag of cocks = my new description of a massive cunt.

Any bitch that thinks they're people to aspire to are to be avoided at all costs.

My answer was Lindsey Lohan. She asked why. I said if you can not only rejuvenate Lindey Lohan's career but also have her do an incredible performance I think you would prove yourself a great director. And the thing is, I think you could get something good out of her. She has at least enough screen presence and acting chops that maybe you could do something with her (unlike say the girls from the Hills or Paris "Fucking" Hilton or even Megan Fox who has yet to demonstrate anything so far).

One of the worst things about it, is the token black PA (quite what she needs a PA for is a fucking mystery) who she bonds with over renting designer handbags on the cheap. Awful, patronising shit.

Ten I've seen this year I liked:

1: Blood and Sand-Tyrone Power bullfighting.

2: In Old Chicago-Tyrone Power and the Chicago Fire. W/ Don Ameche and Alice Faye. Neat.

3: The Sea Hawk-Errol Flynn. Avast! Ahrrr.

4: Objective Burma-Errol again. Obvious BS as far's leaving out 99% of England's role in there-but...decent flick.

5: Up. My name is Dug! That was fun.

6: Kojak season 2 on Hulu.com. Yeah it's pretty good. Fuck you too.

7: Transformers II. I had a blast. It's braindead. I enjoyed it anyways. Jarv has it right. I'm unapologetic. And D.Vader has it right-prob. forget 99% of it along w/ the rest of the summer's fare by Sept.

8: Dr. Zhivago. Never had seen it before save chopped to bits on TV. It's great.

9: Night and the City-Richard Widmark ruled.

10: Springfield Rifles--Gary Cooper. That's a good one, too.

The more I think about it, the more I REALLY disliked Watchmen. It had some GREAT parts and possibilities, but YIKES. 'But--you-you--you liked the Giant Robot Obscenity that Bay spat out--'! Yes I did. Fuck you.

*The same goes for actors, directors, politicians and well just about anybody because most people are entirely useless and boring.

So I started watching Street Fighter on the weekend to see about Chris Klein and everything you've heard is true. His entrance arriving on the crime scene and getting out of the car is one for the ages. And his line deliveries are gold plated. 24 carat. Now I just need to watch the whole thing.

Mint movies I've seen this year? I think all of them were released last year but I only got around to seeing them within the past few months.

In no particular order, my mint of 2009:

Punisher War Zone

The International

Red Cliff 2

Defiance

Valkyrie

Quan tum of Solace

Milk

Taken

Frost/ Nixon

The absolute wank:

Blindness (worst movie ever)

Appaloosa

The Women

The Day the Earth Stood Still

Jarv is right, SATC is one of the worst movies ever made. The "S" should stand for shallow. Who wants to invite any of these douchebags into their lives for 2 and a half hours?

My stomach is killing me again today so this is the best effort I can do for now.

http://tinyurl.com/n5al5e

Including Barack the Barbarian and a Kung Fu Teddy Bear.

http://tinyurl.com/kslbak

Turdmen and Trannyformers sucked. Wolvie was okay at best. What else has there been?

Public Enemies is out here now, so I might go see that tonight.

Seriously, fucking October can't come quick enough. WTWTA and The Road. Then December and Avatar.

watched Point Break, which I think I have come to love more and more. Action scenes are topnotch and the Swaze and stiff man...just love their performances.

I was also catching some of Ghostbusters and Ghostbusters 2. Bill Murray cracks me up. These hold a warm place in my heart as well.

But most of all, nutcase Busey is genius in it.

Point Break is one of the best action flicks ever made and amazingly enough it wasn't all that stupid either. To bad they won't make unstupid movies anymore. Movies suck so bad they've gone the way of music, vomit out shit and hope the fucking dumb ass kids by in.

Mind you, it's based on a fucking atrocious book.

Or that should be "Damon gets done by comedy"

Then the Swaze throws a pit bull at him, which the 2x4 proceeds to punt.

I love that part.

I'm still surprised it's labeled a comedy.

Beer may be drunk. That's not a promise, but a warning that beer may have to be consumed

Hehehehehehe

You know how much The Lost World: Jurassic Park cost? $73 million! Rush Hour 3 was almost twice that, and I didn't see one GD dinosaur in it!* Brett Ratner, yoooooooooooou suck. Or you have a debilitating coke problem.

*Unless you count an aging Jackie Chan, wokka wokka wokka!

Series brings up a good point about Sam Adams always seeming warm but that's probably because they make such heavy beers. To me heavy beers never taste ice cold. You need a Corona for that.

I personally think The Informant looks good. Don't get the Matt Damon hate.

The chase scene though Central Park in DH3 is so awesome because it's all practical. As Danny would say, "It just looks real and gritty as fuck."

I read the script for The Happening, I don't need to ever see the movie.

You want to save money, Hollywood? Don't pay Titbags like him that kind of money. Sheesh.

So who's in a position to have a beer right now?

There are others I've thought of giving that Pulp Fiction/John Travolta treatment to, but I'm having trouble remembering anyone other than DAG at the moment.

Friday/Money Talks/Rush Hour 1-2/The Fifth Element/Jackie Brown/Dead Presidents is the Resume for the highest paid actor until Johnny Deep with Pirates 4 ($50 million), but at least the Pirate movies make ass tons of money.

Oh and a role in MJ's last music video.

Plus, I got 3 hours of sleep last night bc of my damned external hard drive mucking things up.

And I disagree that Sam tastes warm...besides, it ain't in my glass long enough to get any warmer to begin with.

Alisa Beth Underwood:9.25.1987-3.27.2009; I'm sorry you felt like your life was worthless.??

What she do all the time? Post on IMDB? ZING!

And how very true that most beer isn't in front of me long enough to get warm. Anyone else here average about 7-8 minutes a beer?

I agree that Michael Rooker needs more work.

Hopefully Nelly is dead and the media just never bothered to report it.

I was also thinking Danny Devito, but he's got Sunny Right now and is funny as shit.

http://www.uncoached.com/image .php?image=http://www.uncoache d.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/ 06/luli_miller_9.jpg

http://tinyurl.com/nvf2ep

Eddie Griffin needs more work as well.

Maybe Bruce Bruce will get some work (probably won't be good). Since Dave Chapelle is probably dead somewhere, Greer Barnes needs some work (he worked on the Chapelle show). He is funny as shit without being your typical kind of humor.

Are they mentioning Billy Mays death at all? That is a really good show.