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G.I. JOE clip goes online...

steven sommers by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 04:29:50 PM
is shit. that is all
Never trust a director.... by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 04:31:21 PM
That prefers shitty cgi to actual story
FIRST by lockesbrokenleg	May 29th, 2009 04:31:29 PM
to say those suits suck?
Harry by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 04:33:38 PM
Please, what is your opinion on Sommers? I really think the man is a poor director, but somehow keeps getting a shit load of money thrown at him to make overrated plotless films
gawd by simondark	May 29th, 2009 04:33:48 PM
gi joe huh
Fourth!!!! by eule	May 29th, 2009 04:33:57 PM

not a hater, just a realist by sambafreak13	May 29th, 2009 04:34:06 PM
this is going to be very awful
My inner child weeps by Destroyer	May 29th, 2009 04:36:40 PM
Really? This is GI Joe? I made better GI Joe movies with my action figures when I was six. Steven Sommers can lick my bikini zone.
no cobra commander... by simondark	May 29th, 2009 04:37:14 PM
this is really starting to get stupid for me.
Looks Cool by MysteroidSeijin	May 29th, 2009 04:37:17 PM
I'm looking forward to seeing this. Those suits remind me of HALO though.
no cobra commander... by simondark	May 29th, 2009 04:37:21 PM
this is really starting to get stupid for me.
I'll still see it... by NemesisOfZod	May 29th, 2009 04:38:07 PM
But it's no Resolute
It's looks worse and worse with each new clip... by jersey_d	May 29th, 2009 04:38:10 PM
...though I'll still probably catch a matinee out of sheer morbid curiosity
bwahahahahahaha by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 04:38:28 PM
bwahahahahahaha
god those suits look so fucking stupid! by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 04:38:36 PM
i cant really be bothered to give a shit about this movie at all except to laugh at those god awful power suits. what were they thinking? They look even worse in action.
that's a shame by poopoohumor	May 29th, 2009 04:39:07 PM
i think the cobra characters are campy but true to the source material in a fun way. it's those fucking stupid shitty halo suits that are going to ruin this movie.
its...... by BacardiRocky	May 29th, 2009 04:39:30 PM
"YO! JOE!" not "Go Joe." I hate when people get that wrong.
GIJINO by Uncle Pooky	May 29th, 2009 04:39:56 PM
I hate to be that guy, but this really does seem to be "GI Joe in name only."
dumb-ass suits by silentjay	May 29th, 2009 04:40:33 PM
How retarded. So, if those suits can't help them defeat Cobra, what's the point? Or wait, if they need the suits to defeat Cobra, then why do they need to be the "best team of operatives?" If they're so good, why the accelerator suits? They could be in any movie. It's like, some writer or FX guys comes up with a cool idea and those involved just find some movie in which to insert it. I mean, it's ridiculous. Joe had super tight weapons per each character's specialty. Isn't that the technical edge they had above standard soldiers. WHEN-WILL-THE-STUDIOS-GET-THE- IDEA! Treat the source material correctly and success follows. That Nolan guy knows a little about that concept.
storm shadow by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 04:40:56 PM
is carrying a super soaker
Oh yeah..... by BacardiRocky	May 29th, 2009 04:41:37 PM
fuck this film.
Sommers is a manager, not a director by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 04:41:57 PM
he's paid to make a product, thats about it.
baroness.. by simondark	May 29th, 2009 04:44:12 PM
oh sweet baroness whos ass i would gladly clean with my tounge
i like how they made all the Joes EXACTLY THE SAME by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 04:45:20 PM
fucking brilliant choice. Nothing sells toys and merchandise like having a bunch of characters with the same abilities and costumes!
Nice use of the over-used "crowd goes awe!" sound bite. by Mike_D	May 29th, 2009 04:47:54 PM
Its like, 20 years old.
Gi Joe Suits by xspringvictoryx	May 29th, 2009 04:49:00 PM
I dont know if most of you know this but the suits they are wearing is what our future military is gonna be wearing on the battlefield a few years down the line. Future Force soldiers To better equip its soldiers, the U.S. Army is developing an advanced infantry uniform that will provide superhuman strength and greater ballistic protection than any uniform to date. Also, using wide-area networking and onboard computers, soldiers will be more aware of the action around them and of their own bodies. http://science.howstuffworks.c om/ffw4.htm In this article, we will leap onto the battlefield of the future, see how its technology compares with today's and learn how the Future Force Warrior will turn a soldier into an "F-16 on legs."
costumes by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 04:50:40 PM
apparently they took those out of the X-Men playbook Wolverine, Terminator, Tranformers and GI Joe. Fuck me.
Why are all the Joes... by Lucasblows	May 29th, 2009 04:50:43 PM
... dressed like Master Chief from Halo?
What happened to The Barroness' Accent? by offroadcamry	May 29th, 2009 04:52:59 PM
Does this bother anyone else? She's supposed to be RUSSIAN!!! I mean, they have her speaking with an American accent! Sienna's English accent would've been better. This is going to suck worse than Van Helsing.
c'mon, the best thing about the comics and tv show were the kick by NutritiousLove	May 29th, 2009 04:53:03 PM
wait, what?
xspringvictoryx - yeah and they will all be ninjas by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 04:54:04 PM
that flip up walls. btw, they've been saying that shit for decades, and its still dudes with guns, helmets. We can barely afford the military crap we are developing now.
Amazing! Extraordinary! Revolutionary! by Booster Gold Lives	May 29th, 2009 04:55:16 PM
The technology now exists to digitize shit and re-constitute it directly on our computer screens. We as a people should be so proud.
kick-ass suits by NutritiousLove	May 29th, 2009 04:55:26 PM
the sarcasm in my earlier post was cut off. apologies.
Those suits look EXACTLY like the armor from that retarded HALO by Ironhelix	May 29th, 2009 04:55:47 PM

game by Ironhelix	May 29th, 2009 04:56:04 PM

Cobra Commander here: by slone13	May 29th, 2009 04:58:15 PM
http://tinyurl.com/246bab
NO JOKE - THIS LOOKS BAD by BillyMayesHere	May 29th, 2009 04:59:14 PM
Is it me or does she look like a STONER?
If it was Action Man... by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 04:59:48 PM
the British version of G.I Joe, three peple would have to share one suit and then it would be fucked in 10 minutes after the designers didn't realise that the all terrain suits would have to withstand rain or some such shit
xspringvictoryx by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 05:01:38 PM
Yes, the DOD Future Warrior Project is designing exo-skeletons and such for our military, but I think all the excitement is a little premature. All of these advance ideas were BEFORE we realized that hi-tech stuff is great, but it doesn't replace old fashion boots in the mud. The Joes always had the best equipment, and even some stuff that was borderline sci-fi, but they were never a bunch of escapees from Halo.
whats funny is that when the Halo movie gets made... by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 05:01:44 PM
people will say its a ripoff of this.
This is a nice trailer for the new Robocop movie by lordoftheschwing	May 29th, 2009 05:01:55 PM
Hey Steven Sommers, watch GI Joe: Resolute and see how a real GI Joe movie should be made
Actually, I think it looks pretty good. by Playkins	May 29th, 2009 05:02:03 PM
The power suits don't scream G.I. Joe, but everything else looks alright.
Terrible. by MetalMickey	May 29th, 2009 05:02:54 PM
GI Joe?! This shit looks like a Cannon produced Captain Power film. How does Hasbro expect to sell toys when every Joe character looks IDENTICAL. Idiots.
Oh, and G.I. Joe Resolute: by Playkins	May 29th, 2009 05:04:22 PM
That barely resembled the G.I Joe I remember, too. TOTALLY overrated.
nice shoes, wtf. bad bad bad, I'm speechless by Moviegimp	May 29th, 2009 05:04:45 PM

Those power suits are complete.... by IAmLegolas	May 29th, 2009 05:05:44 PM
bullshit. There's no excuse for having those in the movie. And Storm Shadow with no mask on? Just casually rolling in like he's from The Matrix? Who makes these ridiculous decisions? This movie was made for the Slurpee drinking XBOX crowd for sure. God awful, it makes Transformers look more faithful.
Playkins what about it did you like? by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 05:06:15 PM
besides Miller's fine ass, of course. I'm genuinely curious.
I'll be better than AVATAR by codereduk	May 29th, 2009 05:06:41 PM

The Baroness wasn't Russian by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 05:10:10 PM
She was German, wasn't she? I always thought she was kind of a Baader-Meinhof/Red Army Faction kind of gal.
My condolences, GI Joe geeks... by ebonic_plague	May 29th, 2009 05:11:23 PM
...your childhoods are about to be bukkake'd.
Playkins - Resolute by Logan-X	May 29th, 2009 05:12:48 PM
I totally agree with you. It was highly overrated. If they had made it an actual 90-120 minute movie, it might have been better, but for me, it was just too much stuffed into too little a running time. I will say that the Snake-Eyes/Storm Shadow fight was great, but when are producers going to figure out that the Marvel Comics were the best GI Joe will ever be and just work in that vein?
Fuck you MTV! by AtomicRoboticZombieWearwolf	May 29th, 2009 05:12:56 PM
Why can't I watch this shit? 'Cause I live in Canada? I can watch the bullshit fucking ad for sunglass models, but when it comes time for the actual clip to play... nada. Thatnk god I can watch as you sell me some fucking product... that's ok to air in my area, but a clip from a fucking movie? No way! No sir! Eat my frosty Canadian shit you fucking hipster shills! Burn MTV to the fucking ground! I'm so sick of this shit! AGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHRGGGGGG!!!!!!
the baroness in the movie by simondark	May 29th, 2009 05:13:20 PM
can sit on my face and wiggle.
This looks terrible! by Mr_Incredible	May 29th, 2009 05:14:57 PM
What the hell was Joseph Gordon-Levitt thinking when he agreed to do this movie? "Where do I cash my paycheck?" probably. This makes Transformers look like a fucking masterpiece.
Worst bit of all ... by DennisMM	May 29th, 2009 05:14:57 PM
Storm Shadow's shoes.
well said destroyer by killertv	May 29th, 2009 05:15:06 PM
my action figures never had suits. i don't care if the military may have something down the line. i'm sure as shit positive that al qaeda ain't working on a fucking rust weapon. god damn it. each clip of this gets worse. agree with the baroness' lack of accent, but with dialogue like "nice shoes" i'd rather her be mute anyways. joes were badass at one point. now they're lameass shit. kids these days just won't get the same effect. and an elite international military force stopping a "terrorist organization bent on ruling the world" could be as cool - and realistic - as it sounds.
Let me get this straight... by Brewtix	May 29th, 2009 05:19:43 PM
In order to shoot the Eiffel Tower with a long-range missile, you need to break into a building, kill its inhabitants and shoot off of its roof? BTW... I actually like the power suits, I think they'd be awesome in a GOOD movie.
The Cobra Commander on Twitter deserves more praise by YackBacker	May 29th, 2009 05:23:06 PM
Actually, he's a pretty funny fucker. Definitely recommend you follow his exploits.
VS: Who would win? by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 05:23:23 PM
G.I Joe in suit or Jackie Chan in the Tuxedo?
The Super-Suits are fucking awful by Laserhead	May 29th, 2009 05:24:07 PM
Why bother even calling this G.I.Joe? So the only thing it has to do with G.I. Joe are the villains?
So is the purpose of the suits to negate physics? by Stryder	May 29th, 2009 05:24:54 PM
I don't want to be the "this CGI sucks!" guy, but man... the shot of the 'Joe climbing the wall then flipping onto the roof just did not look right. I'm sure FX shots are going to be polished right up to the moment they need to get this into theatres, but that was awkward. Like, Blade 2/Spider-man alley fight awkward. I'm not even going to touch on the baroness without an accent/Stormshadow without a ninja costume stuff because the internet doesn't need anymore nerdrage about it.
AtomicRoboticZombieWerewolf... by Stryder	May 29th, 2009 05:27:34 PM
Trust me when I say YOU are the luckiest person in this Talkback. You're not missing much.
I'm not even sure what to say... by MonkeyLord	May 29th, 2009 05:28:04 PM
"Nice Shoes"? No Accent? Fucking Powersuits? POWERSUITS?? What is it, exactly, that makes this a G.I. Joe movie, again? This clip has pretty much single handedly turned my cautious optimism into complete disappointment. :( Oh well. Count me out. I'm sure this movie will make millions from the semi-retarded. I, for one, will find something a little less insulting to watch.
rachel nichols by Dradis Contact	May 29th, 2009 05:28:12 PM
I hope they don't put Rachel Nichols in one of those suits.
Lisa, Tera, Jody, and Emily hate America by Falafalguy	May 29th, 2009 05:29:07 PM
Can you get an Accelerator Suit at Target?
Cobra Commander by Adelai Niska	May 29th, 2009 05:30:10 PM
is a kid with long hair and a mask that covers his mouth and nose (like an air force pilot). If they're going to make him look retarded why not just use the full-face helmet/sack? And he had better be building a weather dominator.
2nd flop of the summer... by Keeper Of Chimps	May 29th, 2009 05:30:17 PM
What a stupid idea this movie was anyways!
GI Joe was always the toy for stupider children anyways by Keeper Of Chimps	May 29th, 2009 05:33:03 PM
The smart kids were into Star Wars figures. GI Joe was for the trashy kid down the street.
I won't be surprised when this bombs. by Roketopunch	May 29th, 2009 05:33:09 PM
This is wrong on soooo many levels. It's not even GIJoe.:'(
enough already by BroNamath	May 29th, 2009 05:33:37 PM
for fucks sake, it's not "go joe", you mutt, it's "yo joe".
Were those MICRONAUTS??????? by Anal Inflictor	May 29th, 2009 05:33:44 PM
I didn't know this was a crossover movie. But love that Baroness - meow!!!
Stryder is right, AtomicRoboticZombieWearwolf by MonkeyLord	May 29th, 2009 05:34:27 PM
If you give even half a shit about G.I. Joe, you are soooo much better off for having missed this. Just back out now, and pretend you've never heard of this movie.
Simondark - wait a few days before you do by Anal Inflictor	May 29th, 2009 05:38:18 PM
that because I'm going to rape the Baroness' ass back to Cobra-La. And xspringvictoryx aren't the DARPA battlesuit designs a lot less clunky? I remember seeing a black suit (it was only a model) but it was going to have woven armor and small circuitry to accomplish its purpose. I could be wrong.
RE:ebonic_plague by AnarchyWorldsEnd	May 29th, 2009 05:38:27 PM
"...your childhoods are about to be bukkake'd."__________________F unniest thing I've read on the nets in a few days :-)
An Important Memo to Steven Sommers by Just_Another_Fat_Geek	May 29th, 2009 05:39:52 PM
Just because my childhood dresses provocatively, doesn't mean that it's "just asking for it."
YackBacker, you follow him on Twitter, too? by Mr Slippy Fist	May 29th, 2009 05:40:16 PM
The guy is fucking hysterical. A gem thusfar, "One man's trash is another man's treasure. Setting up meeting to buy Gitmo."
i couldnt care less about how close it is to the toyline... by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 05:40:43 PM
i dont care whether the hot piece of ass has an accent or not, or the fact that this in no way resembles 80s toys. i just care how good it is as a movie. and this... thing i just watched was hilariously awful.
Holy Moly! by MegaBeth	May 29th, 2009 05:41:50 PM
That might have been the worse thing I've ever seen.
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh by Sal_Bando	May 29th, 2009 05:42:04 PM
----Not so sure about this--bodyarmour, basically take the Big Robots from Transformers, make them people-and you have this movie. Hmmmm----
GI Joe = Fantastic Four 1 by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 05:43:13 PM
The kids will probably love this shit though. Good for them.
FUCK SAKE, someone YOUTUBE IT PLZ by Dhaemon	May 29th, 2009 05:43:36 PM

We Need this movie to leak online!! by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 05:47:01 PM
I agree!! That way I can secretly watch and despise it at home. Then I can act cool like I've never seen it and I'm too good for it, but I'll tell people it probably sucks. yea, that's what I'll do
So...... by drewlicious	May 29th, 2009 05:48:55 PM
The bad guys are so badass in this universe they don't even need suits? And all the good guys look the same? Who am I supposed to root for again? It kind of reminds me of Transformers. In that case the bad guys had the cooler names (With a name like Starscream you have to be badass, right? Certainly preferable to Bumblebee.)
Okay by MegaBeth	May 29th, 2009 05:49:03 PM
It's not the worse thing I've ever seen. One time in Cancun I drank the water and I was on my period and well.. you do the math. So this GI Joe clip was the second worse thing I've ever seen.
Was the bright neon green RPG missile... by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 05:49:34 PM
....was that a nod to the toys? hehe
The G.I. Joe movies I made in my head by The Fear	May 29th, 2009 05:50:02 PM
as a kid are better than this shit. I want a few million dollars to make my Mercer centric movie.
MegaBeth by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 05:50:53 PM
God damn... That just scared the shit out of me
what a waste of G.I Joe...this could have been great. by FleshMachine	May 29th, 2009 05:52:43 PM
at least we have the marvels
GI Joe? by chuffsterUK	May 29th, 2009 05:52:45 PM
We in the UK had Action Man;)
Makes Bayformers look like Ben-Hur. by HoboCode	May 29th, 2009 05:53:38 PM
Jesus. Pitiful.
Super suits?!? by HapaPapa72	May 29th, 2009 05:55:32 PM
It looks like two super-fast robocops running around... I have a bad feeling about this. At least the Wayans Bros don't have to spoof this as "Action Movie" since Marlon is already in it. And I've never really dug Sienna Miller but DAAAAMMMMNNNN. Lack of accent aside, she IS the freaking Baroness. She's the only one who looks like she's right outta the pages of the comic.
Action Man.. by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 05:55:46 PM
The greatest hero of them all!! I can't remember who the main bad guy was though. Was it doctor x or something? I was more of a M.A.S.K fan anyway
Man that looks horrible by hamo455	May 29th, 2009 05:56:47 PM
There go any hopes I had for this. :(
same problem as Transformers then... by TinSpider	May 29th, 2009 05:59:07 PM
Iconic characters and designs shitted on for the sake of realism. When watching films of this type I don't want realism, especially in the case of Transformers. Cunts.
..... by samuraiwahoo	May 29th, 2009 05:59:45 PM
.... um... what the fuck is going on?!?! I'm scared Honestly, I MIGHT have watched this movie if it was not G.I. Joe. No.... there is no fucking way I could watch this.
Actually the REALLy stupid kids were into Stinkor from He-Man by Keeper Of Chimps	May 29th, 2009 05:59:51 PM
But the next level of dumb were kids that thought Destro was cool.
Looks Like A**... by KISSman24	May 29th, 2009 06:00:32 PM
I was excited about a G.I. Joe movie on paper, but there isn't anything I've seen of this movie thus far makes me the least bit interested. Nothing in this preview (or any other preview) resembles the cartoons I grew up with in the 80s. If you had shown anyone this footage to people without telling them the movie title, I bet you would be hard pressed to find many people who could identify this footage as being from a G.I. Joe movie. I started out as someone who was fairly sure they would see this movie and now I'd say that it's likely that I wouldn't waste my time/money on this crap.
M.A.S.K. by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 06:01:26 PM
Fuck yeah!
M.A.S.K by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 06:02:53 PM
You can still watch the intro on youtube
It looks like what's supposed to be by IndyCollector	May 29th, 2009 06:03:23 PM
A military/fantasy/sci-fi action adventure movie.
M.A.S.K is great by IndyCollector	May 29th, 2009 06:04:41 PM
It combines the best elements of Transformers and G.I. Joe.
I thought is was SPY KIDS 8 by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 06:04:42 PM

toy question by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 06:05:06 PM
i had this toy robot thing that was called Max i think. part of some series of toys. all i can remember was the stretchy accordion arms it had. What were those called?
is = it by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 06:05:52 PM
typing too fast. 103 wpm ain't slowchin'.
BMacSmith by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 06:06:34 PM
aren't you on the internet?
damned-dirty-ape by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 06:08:30 PM
just the intros alone to M.A.S.K., Thundercats, Silverhawks, GI Joe, He-Man, Transformers etc....are better than the shit cartoons kids are being fed nowadays. Fuck the 80s were awesome.
WTF by xsi kal	May 29th, 2009 06:09:13 PM
Sienna Miller actually bugs me less than I expected, though I don't get much of a Baroness vibe at all from her. But that rpg... those power suits... the effects... WTF?
FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS by Underoos Hero	May 29th, 2009 06:10:50 PM
Don't forget Voltron and Robotech. Even though you said "etc"
BMac - Maxx Steele by RipleysPubisMound	May 29th, 2009 06:10:51 PM
Maxx Steele. They also had suction cups on the bottom which made for a different type of toy, but then they also had suction cups in the comics that came with the toy and iirc the cartoon, which made absolutely no sense. Who designs a robot with suction cups on the bottom in the real world? Treads or wheels or legs are so much more pragmatic
BMacSmith by Keeper Of Chimps	May 29th, 2009 06:10:51 PM
You aren't thinking of Stretch Monster are you?
The suits by Omar B	May 29th, 2009 06:11:20 PM
teh gehy.
FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 06:13:24 PM
Couldn't agree with you more. I still remember getting really excited when the thundercats intro came on and seeing Mumra change into that scary badass, screaming like a banshee
no it was Max Steele by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 06:13:54 PM
yeah thats it. i thought he was a bad guy but i guess not. and the suction cups. what were those even for?! What a stupid toy. Cant wait for the movie!
Michael Bay by enderandrew	May 29th, 2009 06:15:51 PM
For all the Michael Bay hate, Bay is twice the director that Sommers is. Sommers really wants to be Bay, but fails at it miserably. Secondly, while I loved GI Joe as a kid, and I'm interested in Eccleston, Parks, etc. I just have ZERO faith in a Sommers film. Honestly, I have considerably more faith in McG than I do in Sommers.
SOMMERS I WILL FUCKING FIGHT YOU. by the Green Gargantua	May 29th, 2009 06:15:57 PM
Piss ant hack, that is what u are bitch, whos fucking nephew are you? I have not wanted combat like this since the Godzilla blasphemy. Watch Predator, watch Resolute. Than read every Larry Hama written file on the back of every Joe toy, than read the comics and than go fuck yourself Steven Sommers! I wish this was an Alan Moore story so that he could hex the shit out of you.
I don't give a fuck about GI Joe the toys or the cartoon by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 06:16:22 PM
I give a shit about GI Joe: the comic by Marvel comics. For all the guys here laughing about how dumb the Joes were, I wonder if you knew they were originally created to appear as a Marvel comic called either Fury Force or the New Howling Commandos and were intended to take on Hydra. When Hasbro approached Marvel about making a comic using the name GI Joe and Hasbro in turn would make toys based on the characters, Marvel had the writers dust-off the Fury Force idea and transform it into GI Joe. And who created most of the characters and wrote the majority of the comic book? Larry Hama, a Japanese-American ex-Viet Nam vet who made sure that the Joes stayed within the realm of believability when it came how they operated militarily. So people can make fun of GI Joe all they want, but name me one other toy in which the fucking character profiles would accurately list their rank, pay rate, MOS, secondary MOS and have them usually armed with actual NATO issued weapons. My Korean War vet dad didn't know what the fuck Eternia or a Sith was, but he sure as fuck knew that a Master Sergeant's enlisted rank was E-8.
It was called Robo Force by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 06:17:10 PM

Looks a bit like by Cat333	May 29th, 2009 06:17:24 PM
Looks a bit like Mighty Morphin Power Rangers crossed with some old Godzilla movie. Ouch. I'm too old for this movie but I remember my son who is almost thirty playing with the figures. I'm not sure what I expected but so far this is not it. The trailer was peculiar too.
Just watched the clip by enderandrew	May 29th, 2009 06:17:49 PM
...and the Iron Man suits REALLY kill this. Who the hell signed off on them? Individual characters will look the same in the suits, and they just look stupid.
Underoos Hero by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 06:18:24 PM
Right you are sir
suits by drizzt2003	May 29th, 2009 06:19:09 PM
The Joe suits look like something from Bubblegum Crisis
What is that, a rocket-propelled jarate?! by Frisco	May 29th, 2009 06:19:27 PM
The sniper would be proud.
by Tabmorevan	May 29th, 2009 06:20:02 PM
So Iam sitting at my computer when I hear a knock at my door and who do I find standing there but Mr.Sommers and the whole cast from G.I. Joe. He smiles as they start making pile on the floor of all my G.I. Joe toys and comics that I have from when I was a kid. I try asking why they are doing this and all he does is smile, that's when he turns around and drops his pants and shits all over my stuff...... wow thanks Sommers for shitting on my childhood it means alot
Continentalop, Its real surprising that you were a GI Joe fan by Keeper Of Chimps	May 29th, 2009 06:20:11 PM
Did they make you put your helmet on before you played with them?
I'm not surprised you weren't by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 06:22:54 PM
4F no doubt.
enderandrew by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 06:23:58 PM
You're bang on there. Sommers is a director that has managed to get some decent acting talent in the past (jackman, beckinsale, weiss, hannah etc) and made them give pathetic, laughable, c-rate performances playing second fiddle to shitty scripts and massive amounts of overused cgi. The man is a waste of space and i cnnot figure out for the life of me how he manages to keep getting these big budgets.
I AM DEAD SERIOUS, BARE KNUCKLE by the Green Gargantua	May 29th, 2009 06:26:13 PM
OR NUMBNUTCHUCKS.
AAAAAND it sucks by kafka07	May 29th, 2009 06:29:29 PM
Why is she a baroness if she doesn't have a German accent? And why doesn't Storm Shadow have his ninja suit on? How could he be incognito when he's with a woman wearing a sinister black suit? At least the Joes are donning those Iron Man-like suits just like in the...comics? Er, wait..
LOOK AT THIS SHIT by the Green Gargantua	May 29th, 2009 06:29:57 PM
http://bit.ly/106RT4 http://www.theterrordrome.com /wp-content/uploads/2009/02/ri se-of-cobra-zartan-01.jpg hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha ha. ok back to work.
Van Helsing by damned-dirty-ape	May 29th, 2009 06:30:31 PM
I still think that film, under a different director, could have been unbelievable. He had some of the greatest literary monsters of all time and could really have done something special. Instead he did what he always does, made a lowest common denominator action film.
HO-O-O-O JOE! by BurnHollywood	May 29th, 2009 06:36:53 PM
"Pull over, me want some HoJo Cola!"
Stephen Sommers by the zapper	May 29th, 2009 06:38:13 PM
Worse than Bay, prbly about on par with Emmerich (and anal leakage)
USA USA USA! by Dhaemon	May 29th, 2009 06:39:25 PM
Now with that out of the way, YOUTUBE this so I can laugh with my American brothers from another mother!
I was afraid this summer was going to be awful. by CreasyBear	May 29th, 2009 06:40:29 PM
I hate being so very right. Aside from Star Trek, I doubt there will be any other movie worthy of buying on DVD (much less worthy of splurging for the cost of a Blu-Ray). This coming from the kind of geek who grew up with Transformers and G.I. Joe. I mean, seriously, how hard is it to get the main idea for G.I. Joe? How do you mess it up with Iron Man uniforms? And to make things worse, The Brothers Bloom, which I'm actually excited to see, isn't coming anywhere near my town. Sigh.
I want to drink Sienna Miller's cunt juice! by Fareal	May 29th, 2009 06:47:49 PM
Holy fuck she is hot! What was Jude Law thinking? Why would he cheat on her with some fat baby sitter? I guess if you have access to thousands of women just as hot as Sienna, then you start to look for something "different".
So... that office building was the only place to target the Eiff by odysseus	May 29th, 2009 06:53:27 PM
WTF? And those suits look like ass.
What's the NINJA doing with the Big Fucking Gun? by Clavius	May 29th, 2009 06:59:06 PM
Real stealthy.
Yuck by dancetothebeatofthelivingdead	May 29th, 2009 07:05:48 PM
What thew fuck went through the minds of TPTB? Who thought this looked inviting in any way shape or form? I mean, this really looks fucking horrible, just awful. I hate the way that the fanboys just rip on shit to be ripping on shit. I hate the way that the fanboys pretend forevermore to hate movies that they really liked. That being said, I don;t know if I can avoid this movie; I might just have to see it in order to see if the it can deliver on the monumental awfulness that all the trialers and clips are promising. If this were just some shitty low budget bad CGI direct to video junker, I would still go out of my way to talk about how terrible and sterile and cheesy it looks. The fact that it is G.I. Joe, now I'm 32, prime G.I. Joe age, I grew up with this imaginary badass war machine in my imagination. I know that nothing could live up to the wars and battles I saw in my head when I was eight, but could they at least try? The fact that it is G.I. Joe just really depresses me for some reason. Joe was dirty, they were grunts, the ultimate badass grunts, but still grunts. Think of the bad guys and not just Cobra but the Dreadnoughts, this movie just had so many different cool directions it could have taken. I just keep on rambling and yet i'm speechless to pin the tail on the disgust. It's mot like they just put out a bad product, they totally revamped Joe to pander to who? Video game players? Matrix fans? What? What was the motive here? It's just so fucking awful looking.
I'm at work so I had to watch this on mute. by AzulTool	May 29th, 2009 07:10:47 PM
I can't imagine it possibly making a difference.
I hope the A-Team characters wear all black suits by cylon_conspiracy	May 29th, 2009 07:11:22 PM
So they can look like GI Joe, The X-Men, The Matrix, Underworld, and a few I'm probably leaving out. I think all action adventure and sci-fi characters should always wear only black so you can't tell the characters apart. Especially if they had unique costumes in their original form, we don't want any individuality here. I watched a cartoon called G.I. Joe back in the 80s, and collected the action figures. They should make a movie of that, maybe they just licensed the name for this one. I don't think it's any of the same characters from the 80s version.
Ah, shit, I'll probably see it by lockesbrokenleg	May 29th, 2009 07:19:41 PM
Hopefully there'll be a lot of free advance screenings.
THIS IS THE GOOD CLIP. by the Green Gargantua	May 29th, 2009 07:20:01 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =PYelFySexWo
THE SOMMERS VERSION by the Green Gargantua	May 29th, 2009 07:21:56 PM
is more gay,
i wish we had a bad ass inspector gadget movie by MrHyde	May 29th, 2009 07:25:32 PM
sigh
JEM better be more faithful to the original by cylon_conspiracy	May 29th, 2009 07:28:07 PM
otherwise, it will be truly outrageous.
What scares the fuck out of me is... by holy____batman	May 29th, 2009 07:39:36 PM
They thought this was good enough to make a clip...what the fuck is the rest of the movie like...FUCK ME, and right on contentilop my dad was the same way respect to the VETS
Fucking terrible... by jabman	May 29th, 2009 07:42:06 PM
I have lurked on this site since 1997, and have always been content to lurk. but this movie looks so godawful, I had to actually register just to point out how godawful it is. What the fuck were they thinking? Stephen fucking Summers? My spankerchief has more potential to spontaneously generate a good movie than that tampon dropping. who the fuck thought it was a good idea to put that worthless hack in charge of this? motherfucker hasn't directed a flick since Van Helsing tanked and deservedly so. then i see on IMDB this smegma-filled asshole is directing Tarzan next?!? FUCK!!! This movie will tank SO hard.
its G.I. JOE by Semen Stains	May 29th, 2009 07:42:08 PM
C'mon those anyone reallllllly give a shit,honestly.Always gonna have the bad ass cartoon movie,cobra la la la la la l a etc
That's the worst part, Batman... by jabman	May 29th, 2009 07:46:39 PM
That probably IS the best the've got... They're actually proud of this boiling cauldron of diarrhea they're foisting upon us...
Continentalop by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 07:51:59 PM
GI JOE trade paperbacks are coming out. i got a more than a couple of back issies but they're in shit condition and scatterred about. i liked them best cause they didnt pull any punches. YO FUCKIN JOE!
oooooooooooo by maitlanr	May 29th, 2009 07:53:14 PM
god this really looks fucking awesome. nice shoes-------------ass-cracking writing and reading. man man o man. i'm going to squeak all the way to the theater!
anybody trying to show us clips has me worried... by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 07:54:47 PM
McG anyone?
WoW by sokitome	May 29th, 2009 07:56:13 PM
just wow...how does this like this get funding?..really..how?
WoW by sokitome	May 29th, 2009 07:56:24 PM
just wow...how does shit this like this get funding?..really..how?
Since when does GI Joe need fucking Power Armor by The_Ed_Carden	May 29th, 2009 07:58:37 PM
This is absolutely what bugs me the most about this potential (and probable) debacle. It looks like the director really wanted to make an Iron Man movie but got stuck with GI Joe. I'm likely going to pass on this one.
genius..no by theKip	May 29th, 2009 07:59:50 PM
You never saw storm shadow or snake eyes. They were always in their costumes. I could the "faceless" cobras having some generic power armor suit, because they were just cannon fodder. But the Joes were all unique. They were kinda like the village people. You had you're fire man guy, and scuba guy, green beret guy, etc. They were unique that was the cool thing. That power armor stuff just looks like somebody looked at halo or crysis and said "neat, I think I'd like to insert this into a movie". Fail.
BMacSmith: I'll tell you: by Playkins	May 29th, 2009 07:59:55 PM
Exotic villians? Check. Exotic locations? Check. Guys fighting them? Check. Looks like G.I. Joe to me. With the exception of the comics, there has NEVER been a particularly refined or sophisticated version of the 80s Joes. This movie is right in line, and if you are telling yourselves otherwise, you are kidding yourself.
theKip: BULLSHIT by Playkins	May 29th, 2009 08:00:39 PM
Read the comics.
crashing through the sky by maitlanr	May 29th, 2009 08:01:30 PM
comes a fearful cry COBRA!!!!!(cobra!!!!)
playkins by maitlanr	May 29th, 2009 08:03:47 PM
the movie with Don Johnson and Burgess Fucking Meredith.... ...ps...i saw some dude on the subway today with the golden boxing gloves necklace a la rocké.
Playkins: watch the tv cartoon by theKip	May 29th, 2009 08:03:57 PM
Never read the comic. Referring more to the feel of the cartoon. Wouldn't suprise me if the comic had a different aesthetic and maybe even tone than the cartoon. The transformer comic had a much darker tone than the movie.
Awesome news Six Demon by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 08:08:35 PM
I have been waiting for the Marvel GI Joe trades forever. I used to own a bunch of the comics, but alas, I sold most of them during a garage sale right before I went to college.
maitlanr, what about the animated movie? by Playkins	May 29th, 2009 08:08:52 PM
I hope you aren't saying it's good, because go watch it again.... bbblllleeeeccchhhhh.
wow...i grew up with gijoe, had many of the by southafricanguy	May 29th, 2009 08:13:05 PM
toys, read and collected the old Marvel comics etc...And this does not look like gijoe. Those suits really do look reatarded. Oh well...at least now i know not to waste my time and money on this piece of shit....and knowing is half the battle....
Hmmm, not really feeling the suits. However by ganymede3010	May 29th, 2009 08:13:08 PM
The Military is investing millions into battle ready exo-skeletons. Lockheed-Martin already has a working prototype called the HULC. This is going to appeal to little kids like the Fantastic Four did, this isn't for adults.
Painful by BackwardGalaxy	May 29th, 2009 08:19:03 PM
Simply painful.
Yo! That looks like shit! by lockesbrokenleg	May 29th, 2009 08:25:04 PM

i'm not only saying by maitlanr	May 29th, 2009 08:27:03 PM
that the animated movie is good i'm saying it's "city lights" good. it's fucking "bande á part" good i have cancer.
WOw that clipped killed it by Series 7	May 29th, 2009 08:35:15 PM
Why put a Wayans brother in any movie that isn't made by a Wayans brother? Also hopefully this will end Chatum whatever his name run in films and he'll go back to working at the local 7-11.
Fuck this silly shit... by sfgeek	May 29th, 2009 08:38:33 PM
This is an embarrassment to GI Joe. I know that a lot of people think that GI Joe was a cartoon and couldn't be taken seriously, but this is just a mockery of what GI Joe was and is. I would have much rather seen something that sort of, kind of represented GI Joe, in some respect. This just sort of took the whole concept and shat on it. Storm Shadow unmasked? Realistically I get that a ninja can't always be in ninja garb, but fuck, Storm Shadow was never unmasked. Seeing that has me thinking we see Snake Eyes unmasked as well. That will seriously suck ass. Asinine rant over.
southafricanguy by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 08:38:48 PM
another dumb summer film for the masses!!!
ARRGGG! by jediknight1701	May 29th, 2009 08:39:22 PM
Baroness barely has an accent! Stormshadow unmasked!?, those suits are horible!! Why can't movie creators stick to what the source material is. If they don't want to then make another movie and don't call it G.I. Joe. Maybe use an original idea for a change and leave the cartoon movies to someone who appreciates the source!
You know how I know it sucks? by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 08:45:20 PM
I finally was able to get through the whole trailer finally. First time I had to hit stop on the line "nice shoes." Second time I had to hit stop once i sow the Power Suits. Third time I had to hit stop when they said "You get the missile and I'll get the kill switch." I FINALLY got all the way through now, and now I wish I just walked away after I hear "nice shoes."
I also know it sucks by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 08:46:54 PM
Because my grammar and spelling in the last post was so fucking horrible. A mere minute of this thing will knock you senseless.
Owww...my eyes! and ears. by RogueWarrior65	May 29th, 2009 08:47:03 PM
Dear God that was dreadful. However, what I found amusing was the ad for Target picnic crap and the phrase "Melamine plates"...wait, what?!?
Continentalop--why call it GI JOE? by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 08:47:08 PM
to get us in the seats. sick of this shit. to think Transformers looks good compared to this. This will be the GODZILLA this summer. dumb fun, no nevermind just dumb.
G.I. No-Go by Kehrageous	May 29th, 2009 08:55:18 PM
a.k.a. G.I. Blow
I'm looking forward to the MOON KNIGHT movie. by Fareal	May 29th, 2009 08:57:15 PM
I really am. They will put him in an all black costume, because the Hollywood producers will think that an all white costume, with a hood, will make people think he is part of the KKK.
sad really by FUCK_YOU_GEORGE_LUCAS	May 29th, 2009 08:59:20 PM
i abandoned hope for this film long ago when that pic of marlon wayans surfaced. talk about a red flag
Six Demon Bag by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 09:07:32 PM
What I don't get is not only why do they call it GI JOE, but why did they think that this is what people want to see. I'm sure some executive said "GI Joe was just some dumb cartoon and toys from the 80s. Its for kids, so lets make it stupid." First off, it wasn't just a toy or a cartoon, it also was a damn good comic book (which is the depiction many of us here prefer). Secondly, it isn't FOR kids. It once WAS for kids, but guess what? All those kids in the 1980s have grown up and now are in there 30s (or at least late 20's and early 40s). Kids nowadays have no clue who the fuck GI Joe is, but damn Gen-Xers sure as hell know who they are, and they should be your target audience. And they don't want to see a dumb, cartoonish GI JOE; they want to see a kick-ass, adult GI JOE - the shit the cartoons, toys and comics could never show but we have all thought about. It is the same thing as Batman Begins, TDK and even Battlestar Galatica, updating them for a new generation. Hell, even the Harry Potter books have grown more mature as the readers have gotten older; so should the damn GI JOE universe (look at the current comics now to see what direction the fans want). So, know we don’t want GI JOE to be like THE POWER RANGERS meets IRON MAN and MEGA FORCE; we want it to be a combination of DELTA FORCE, JAMES BOND, WHO DARES WINS, THE DIRTY DOZEN, GUNS OF NAVARONE, and a little bit of THE OCTAGON thrown in for good Ninja measure.
THANK GOD this is getting villified by IndustryKiller!	May 29th, 2009 09:11:26 PM
If you think that all it needs to be is random villains and good guys they it's YOU who doesn't get it. Oh and fuck you. Harry was right about how important the aesthetic designs were to the original. The fact htat they can't even get a reasonable facsimile thereof is goddamn ridiculous. Next is the characters, they weren't terribly deep, but they were rich nonetheless, with cool Larry Hama backstories and THAT is why they are making a GI Joe movie and not a M.A.S.K. movie.
With that said Resolute was a HUGE disappointment by IndustryKiller!	May 29th, 2009 09:13:55 PM
Doing nothing at all in service of the characters (especially that horrible and random Snake Eyes sub-plot) and had a plot that was probably less exciting then 90% of the ones from the cartoon. And Cobra Commander was homogenized, which is a cardinal sin as he's easily the coolest Joe character. Just objectively speaking.
FUCK by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 09:14:15 PM
This is probably the only movie out there that I truly, truly hate because it is so fucking insulting to movie-goers. Lowest common denomination doesn't even describe this, this is thinking everyone out there is a full-blown retard that will see anything you give them. Normally I could care less that Hollywood made a piece of shit film, but this is like they fucking baked a loaf of shit and than have the nerve to try serving it to us WHILE claiming that it is cake. Fuck this shit. I'm going to the gym.
FUCK!!!! by Continentalop	May 29th, 2009 09:16:26 PM

just proves how incredibly stupid movie execs really are by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 09:20:58 PM
i know! lets make an 80s NOSTALGIA movie, but lets aim it at kids that no fuck all about it. Then lets destroy all merchandising opportunites by making all the characters clones of each other! Who are the fucking geniuses in charge around here? They are obviously only in it to make money, yet they are too fucking stupid to do it in an intelligent way! its kinda funny when you think about it.
*know by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 09:22:43 PM

fuck that by redkamel	May 29th, 2009 09:23:10 PM
that looks laughably bad. Resolute kicked so much ass. I might just stay home and watch that again. Industry killer, I thought the Snake eyes sub plot was all right. Besides, they have plenty of time to for more..(I just saw the pilot). Cobra Commander was kinda homogenized though, but still, the "bumbling leader" thing got kind of old. And the plot was actually pretty similiar to any of the ones from the cartoon that I remember. At any rate, even for whatever faults it has, it sure looks a HELL of a lot better than the movie.
Because G.I. Joe was always SO REALISITIC... by Zardozap2005	May 29th, 2009 09:27:42 PM
Right. Give me a fucking break. Nerds are never happy, I swear. You will go see it. You know you will.
Cannot see it, is there a link? by Dhaemon	May 29th, 2009 09:32:03 PM
From somewhere else?
Oh my God!!! It looks so lame... by Russman	May 29th, 2009 09:36:31 PM
Please please let us hope this bombs. I hate to say it but this is just so stupid any corny. Power suits!?!?! I shouldn't be complaining because I'm not going to see it, but you'd think they would at least, I don't know... TRY to make something that wasn't shitty on purpose.
Wanna buy some TIDE? by daggor	May 29th, 2009 09:45:51 PM
Here's a blonde. And a brunette. And a black lady. And a vaguely Latino chick. And... uh... an Asian woman. And a Middle Eastern Lady... who are we missing...? How about a fat chick? There. We love everyone. Buy some goddamn TIDE.
Why do they need super suits? by lockesbrokenleg	May 29th, 2009 09:49:06 PM
Cobra should be the one with Super Suits since Cobra always had the latest tech.
I know it's been said already, but... by sfgeek	May 29th, 2009 09:50:13 PM
This actually makes Transformers 2 look tolerable (solely based on trailers, and clips, nothing else).
fuck that lame bentley, and fuck those lame plastic suits by HaterofCrap	May 29th, 2009 09:55:31 PM
that car has no edge to it...its just pretty in a bad pop culture sort of way. and who could fuck up supersuits? i mean really...you gotta be a complete tool to blow that one.
Out of the woodwork, I've come... by VoiceOfSaruman	May 29th, 2009 09:55:37 PM
...like many others who haven't posted for years, or never posted before....just to say how fucking horrible this movie looks. Christ. Please, no one go see this movie. Don't encourage them. And let it be heard throughout the land, that the movie won't fail because there's not a market for a G.I.JOE movie. There is. There's just no market for this excrement. I can understand not putting Wolverine in the yellow spandex, maybe. But this is so far removed to be unrecognizable. And, on top of that, it sucks. The people behind this movie, from the hack director to whoever did the terrible CGI, should be run out of the business permanently, they shouldn't even be making home videos. And please stop saying "uh but yeah dude, that chick is hot." Go to a porn site and wack off already. Scary that the show 24 is closer to G.I.JOE than this stupid movie.
What the hell was that crap? by AHGrayLensman	May 29th, 2009 09:57:31 PM
That does not look like a movie for seeing; it looks like a movie for lying down and avoiding...
This film is a remake of "Megaforce"… by blakindigo	May 29th, 2009 09:57:33 PM
I'm now 100% convinced.
Suck by My friends call me Killjoy	May 29th, 2009 10:04:50 PM
suck suck suck suck suck suck!!!
hahahaha by wash	May 29th, 2009 10:05:51 PM
Pure Scheiße!
This movie looks like it was made of FAIL. by uberfreak	May 29th, 2009 10:06:09 PM

Watched it again (god knows why) by sfgeek	May 29th, 2009 10:06:09 PM
and, holy shit, that is some bad acting to boot. It would appear that even in a suit of incredible power there are no acting skills. I also have a sneaking suspicion that if someone were run into by a person wearing one of those suits at what would seem to be full speed, they would be hurting pretty bad, ninja or not. Shitty.
This movie looks like it was made of FAIL. by uberfreak	May 29th, 2009 10:06:23 PM

Soooommmmmmmmmeeeeerrrrrrrrrssss s! by My friends call me Killjoy	May 29th, 2009 10:06:27 PM
3 strikes and you're out!
SPOILERS: Revenge of the Fallen novel by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 10:12:54 PM
Judge for yourself if Transformers is better than G.I. Joe: Jetfire WAS a Decepticon that shifted allegiance to the Autobots. Before dying, he gives Optimus Prime his wings to get to the Giza Pyramid, so that the latter could defeat The Fallen. The blonde that Sam meets in college is a Decepticon disguised as a girl. "Alice" is her name, since it was a copy of a human-like Honda robot. Optimus Prime goes into stasis after being stabbed by Megatron (Optimus goes mano-o-mano with both Starscream and Megatron in that forest in the trailer). Sam actually dies, and while he was being revived, he sees a vision of the original 13 Primes,killed by the Fallen, telling him that they choose him to be the keeper of the Matrix of Leadership (the dagger-like thingy that Sam picks from the ground in the trailer, produced by the AllSpark thousands of years ago as a key to a machine atop the Pyramid of Giza that produces Energon, a secondary energy source taken from any star, in this case, our sun). Simmons has a major role in the film and becomes a hero of sorts. After being fired from Sector 7, he spent his time in his mother's deli, and he keeps a secret attic above him mom's restaurant, blogging with the name "Robo Warrior" who happens to be discovered by Sam's geek dorm mate.Simmons is responsible for helping out a carrier with coordinates to destroy Devastator by sneaking under the biggest Decepticon ever. And Mikaela gives Simmons a kiss (well, a flying kiss that is, for helping her and Sam). Yes, it has a happy ending.
Optimus Prime revived by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 10:14:48 PM
Sam uses the Matrix of Leadership to revive Optimus by "stabbing" it in Optimus' heart.
but who is the stereotypical slang throwing black guy? by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 10:23:36 PM
i call bullshit on your novel spoiler until i find that out. and i know every Bay movie has one.
Zardozap2005 - who said anything about realism? by BMacSmith	May 29th, 2009 10:27:12 PM
its just stupid.
axeemall....thanks dude, so what happens to by southafricanguy	May 29th, 2009 10:42:04 PM
Megatron? Does he die again? What about the Fallen? Are there any setups for something like Unicron? Is the end battle really big in scale? Come on dude, give up some more spoilers. Enquiring minds want and need to know...
3rd transformers film to be on Cybertron??? by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 10:47:54 PM
just do it so the whole film will be CGI and END IT!!!
Works as a comedy spoof, not as an action movie. by Nerd Rage	May 29th, 2009 10:57:43 PM
The shit is pretty funny when you laugh at how bad it is but as an action movie it fails on every level.Put this in the Snakes on the Plane/laughably bad category not the cool action flick with quality nostalgia category.
SPOILERS: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen Novel by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 11:01:40 PM
Judge for yourself if Transformers is one of the best films this summer: Jetfire WAS a Decepticon that shifted allegiance to the Autobots. He was one of the original Seekers of the Allspark that reached earth thousands of years ago, like B.C. times. When his “batteries run out,” it must be that he is automatically programmed to retain the ability to copy any machine from a cart to whatever technology that existed throughout history while he lay dormant (not sure if this would be explained in the movie, which could be a source of a plot hole). The blonde that Sam meets in college is a Decepticon disguised as a girl. "Alice" is her name, since it was a copy of a human-like Honda robot (This blonde seduces Sam, and as a probe (its “tongue” ) is being inserted into his mouth to "hack" his brain, Mikaela enters his room and sees the girl on top of her boyfriend, and that pisses her off. Optimus Prime goes into stasis (he's not really dead, but it would take like hundreds or thousands of years for his body to repair itself) after being stabbed by Megatron (Optimus goes mano-o-mano with both Starscream and Megatron in that forest in the trailer). Sam ACTUALLY DIES, and while he is being revived, he sees a “heaven” vision of the original 13 Primes murdered by the Fallen, and further telling him that they choose him to own the Matrix of Leadership (the dagger-like thingy that Sam picks from the ground in the trailer, produced by the AllSpark thousands of years ago as a key to a machine atop the Pyramid of Giza that destroys a star (our sun in this case) to produce Energon, a secondary energy source if the AllSpark gets destroyed). He hears Mikaela tell him “I love you.” And when he finally wakes up, his first words are “I love you.” It sounds cheesy but it isn’t. A minor plot involves the fact that they haven’t said “I love you” to each other and each were challenging the other as to who should say it first, which complicates matters since Mikaela witnessed first-hand Sam’s propensity to be disloyal to him when he is far away from her. Sam uses the Matrix of Leadership crystal to revive Optimus' Spark. Before dying, Jetfire gives Optimus Prime his wings so that the latter could get to the Giza Pyramid fast, to stop the Fallen from activating a machine that could destroy the sun. Simmons has a major role in the film and becomes a hero of sorts. After being fired from Sector 7, he spends his time in his mother's deli, and he keeps a secret attic above his mom's restaurant, blogging with the name "Robo Warrior" who happens to be discovered by Sam's geek dorm mate. Simmons is responsible for helping out a U.S. Carrier with coordinates to destroy Devastator by sneaking under the biggest Decepticon ever. And Mikaela gives Simmons a kiss (well, a flying kiss that is, for helping her and Sam). Yes, it has a happy ending. I'm not sure how they would explain why Arcee is a girl, or the concept of trans-dimensional travel. Two Decepticons defect to the Autobots: Jetfire and Wheels, that small Decepticon who ends up enamored by Mikaela. Like he hugs her and burrows his head into her cleavage, but she didn't mind since she senses that the robot isn't really aware of what sex is.
Epilogue of Transformers 2 by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 11:04:45 PM
Southafricanguy: Megatron and Starscream enters what it seems like a black hole (trans-dimensional travel, and enter a ship called the Nemesis. The Fallen came from this place... Megatron ends up waking up the other robots in sarcophagi in this ship. Megatron wanted to be a Prime,which is why he woke up the Fallen but Primes are born, not made, according to Optimus. Optimus Prime is the last of the Primes. He was an orphan and his "Prime" ancestors were murdered by the Fallen. There's no clue about Unicron, however.
if i want action comedy i watch TRUE LIES!! by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 11:05:19 PM
PROFESSIONAL!!! though considered a throwaway by some, its waaay more serious than this shit and doesnt dumb it down for the audience. christ what a difference a decade makes!
The end battle is awesome in Revenge of the Fallen by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 11:07:41 PM
Simmons sneaking under Devastator...Mikaela and Sam avoiding missile fire from about 11 Decepticons...Sam dying...Sam reviving Optimus...
I JUST SAW LASERPANTS SUCKING CAMERON'S COCK!!! by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 11:09:03 PM
during the abyss of all films!!! how's that for irony?
Optimus flies! by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 11:10:09 PM
He kicks the butt of The Fallen, Starscream and Megatron in the final battle.
CGI vs CGI=BORING!!!! by Six Demon Bag	May 29th, 2009 11:11:36 PM
i want emotion and characters i care about..
Stephen Sommers should... by DarkZoneGraphics	May 29th, 2009 11:22:25 PM
not only have his Director's Guild card revoked (I think him and Uwe Boll are the same person) but his Man Card should be revoked as well. Why? Because he's taken my inner child out back, pulled down his pants and raped him with this pile of shit!
Support this: Spectacular Spiderman by future help	May 29th, 2009 11:23:03 PM
i just saw 2 episodes of this by accident tonight...i love it. My new favorite action adventure cartoon. Not since Samurai Jack has tv animation entralled me in such adventure. It feels like the best of Raimis Spidey mixed with some James Cameron action mixed with Batman old school. Below is a review i found online to help convey my feelings: (seek em out and download em so we can watch more together in the upcoming weeks...eh?) Review: Spectacular Spider-Man isn't just a great cartoon. It's a great show, period, that is deserving of a better time slot. Seriously, if it were shown during prime-time, it would fare better than most would think. For one, the action scenes are all fluidly animated. Spiderman moves the way he should. He jumps, flips, swings, and dodges with the greatest of ease. After watching the first season, I don't think I've seen him make the same move in the same way twice—amazing. Not only are the action scenes visually arresting, they're well thought out as well. Yes, Spidey is superhumanly strong, fast, and agile. However, most of his victories come from him using his brain. He defeated Electro by dropping him in a swimming pool. The Shocker gets an abandoned theater brought down around his head. Spidey took out the Sandman by drenching him with wet cement. The Rhino was defeated by being lured into a steam tunnel where he quickly overheated. Then there is the humor that, so far, has been absent from any version of Spiderman outside of the comics. This show has some vicious one liners that sound like they were written by professional stand up comedian. Case in point, Spidey is fighting the Shocker and just ripping on him. (Shocker—Don't you mock me). (Spidey—Hey, it's what I do. I mock. I'm a mocker). The Green Goblin tells Parker that they should join forces to take over New York City. The hero's response: Are we just talking Manhattan or all five. The snappy writing doesn't end with the tights though. Peter Parker's more normal life is covered full and well, providing this show with less fantastic and more dramatic character interactions. Pete's relationship with his aunt is more fleshed out and shown to be extremely close, with him having a curfew and suffering restrictions. And it makes sense. After all, they're all that they've got. At school, Pete is the perennial outcast and has to deal with being picked on relentlessly. However, the bullies and valley girls are never cast in a one dimensional light and, as the season progresses, are allowed to grow as characters. Eventually, they even start warming up to him. This is especially evident in the Flash Thompson and Liz Allen characters. The real meat of the slower paced scenes, however, all take place at the Daily Bugle. J.J.J. is faithfully depicted as the perennial boss from Hell and to hilarious effect. The first time Parker approaches him about taking photos of Spiderman, the guy has him kicked out of the bullpen before he can say anything. Then there is Betty Brant. She is an adult. Parker is sixteen. Yet, there is still an attraction between the two that is resolved in a way that feels right, not forced, and never becomes creepy. I fell out over Aunt May going all the way into Manhattan to tell Brant to back off her teenage nephew, all while dodging a rampaging Rhino. When Parker trounces the bad guy, only to end up losing out with a babe, the show is working on overtime and firing on all cylinders. The Spectacular Spider-Man has amazing animation, sensational action, side splitting humor, absolutely relatable drama, snappy dialogue, and, lastly, spectacular writing.
CGI Joe! by AragornElfstone	May 29th, 2009 11:29:53 PM
I'm surprised nobody else has thought of that! Or at least they haven't posted it. This looks pretty terrible.
FUCK OFF HOLLYWOOD. FUCK OFF MTV. by --- Emperor ---	May 29th, 2009 11:37:39 PM
WORTHLESS UNINSPIRED BY-THE-NUMBERS CRETINS: FUCK OFF AND BURN IN HELL YOU TOXIC, TALENTLESS TITS.
BY THE WAY: by --- Emperor ---	May 29th, 2009 11:38:35 PM
FUCK OFF STEPHEN SUMMERS. I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOUR DUMB ASS FOR VAN HELSING. FUCKING PRICK.
Edited-- SPOILER ALERT: Revenge of the Fallen novel by AxeEmAll	May 29th, 2009 11:42:49 PM
Judge for yourself if Revenge of the Fallen is one of the best films this summer: Jetfire WAS a Decepticon that shifted allegiance to the Autobots. He was one of the original Seekers of the Allspark that reached earth thousands of years ago, like B.C. times. When his “batteries run out,” it must be that he is automatically programmed to retain the ability to copy any machine from a cart to whatever technology that existed throughout history while he lay dormant (not sure if this would be explained in the movie, which could be a source of a plot hole). The blonde that Sam meets in college is a Decepticon disguised as a girl. "Alice" is her name, since it was a copy of a human-like Honda robot (This blonde seduces Sam, and as a probe (its “tongue” ) is being inserted into his mouth to "hack" his brain, Mikaela enters his room and sees the girl on top of her boyfriend, and that pisses her off. Optimus Prime goes into stasis after being stabbed by Megatron (Optimus goes mano-o-mano with both Starscream and Megatron in that forest in the trailer. Optimus is not really dead, but it would take like hundreds or thousands of years for his body to repair itself). Sam ACTUALLY DIES, and while he is being revived, he sees a “heaven” vision of the original 13 Primes murdered by the Fallen, and further telling him that they choose him to own the Matrix of Leadership (the dagger-like thingy that Sam picks from the ground in the trailer, produced by the AllSpark thousands of years ago as a key to a machine atop the Pyramid of Giza that destroys a star -our sun in this case- to produce Energon, a secondary energy source if the AllSpark gets destroyed). He hears Mikaela tell him “I love you.” And when he finally wakes up, his first words are “I love you.” It sounds cheesy but it isn’t. A minor plot involves the fact that they haven’t said “I love you” to each other and each were challenging the other as to who should say it first, which complicates matters since Mikaela witnessed first-hand Sam’s propensity to be disloyal to him when he is far away from her. Sam uses the Matrix of Leadership crystal to revive Optimus' Spark. Before dying, Jetfire gives Optimus Prime his wings so that the latter could get to the Giza Pyramid fast, to stop the Fallen from activating a machine that could destroy the sun. Simmons has a major role in the film and becomes a hero of sorts. After being fired from Sector 7, he spends his time in his mother's deli, and he keeps a secret attic above his mom's restaurant, blogging with the name "Robo Warrior" who happens to be discovered by Sam's geek dorm mate. Simmons is responsible for helping out a U.S. Carrier with coordinates to destroy Devastator by sneaking under the biggest Decepticon ever. And Mikaela gives Simmons a kiss a flying kiss that is, for helping her and Sam. I'm not sure how they would explain why Arcee is a girl, or the concept of trans-dimensional travel. The other Decepticon that changes allegiances is Wheels, that small Decepticon who ends up enamored by Mikaela. Like he hugs her and burrows his head into her cleavage, but she doesn't mind since she perceives the robot more like a pet. At the end of the movie, one Optimus defeats the Fallen, Megatron and Starscream escape through a portal, a continuum (a.k.a. trans-dimensional travel, and enter another dimension where the ship called the Nemesis is located. Megatron summoned the Fallen from this place. His last words are "Arise!" as he wakes up the other robots in sarcophagi in this ship. Megatron wanted to be a Prime, which is why he promised to work for his Master, the Fallen. Optimus, however, tells Megatron that he was deceived by the Fallen, since Primes are born--not made. The Fallen is a Prime that murdered Optimus’ ancestors, which is why Optimus is an orphan and the last of the Primes.
popcorn by aboriginal	May 30th, 2009 01:20:51 AM
pure popcorn
Fuck off MTV. Why make us watch an ad then tell us no?! by wowsah156	May 30th, 2009 01:21:28 AM
Good mess up of adverising for GI Joe marketing twats!! GI Joe will suck ass hats!!
I have zero attachment to GI Joe by natecore	May 30th, 2009 01:21:49 AM
so this doesn't see too bad....I'm on board w/ bashing the costume design choices, but the pacing of this little 40 seconds is great. Not to mention Lee looks bad ass (once again), so I'm curious to see what his character is like.
NEW ROTF TV SPOT! by Trannyformers_Apologist	May 30th, 2009 01:24:46 AM
http://tinyurl.com/39gc bz
NEW ROTF TV SPOT! by Trannyformers_Apologist	May 30th, 2009 01:26:55 AM
... http://tinyurl.com/39gc bz
This is NOT G.I. Joe! by squarebird	May 30th, 2009 01:31:27 AM
U.S. Army General Infantrymen would NOT be acting as Robocops in Paris. I really thought this was a commercial on the way to the actual clip. After replaying it twice it finally dawned on me that this was the movie. Pathetic. A G.I. Joe movie would ideally be set in WWII, when soldiers were actually called G.I. Joes.
lockesbrokenleg by Frodo T. Baggins	May 30th, 2009 01:45:41 AM
Your a fag
eule by Frodo T. Baggins	May 30th, 2009 01:46:15 AM
Fag wannabe
This is more like Halo Joe by ganymede3010	May 30th, 2009 01:46:20 AM
Staring Master Chief Himself the robosapien General Duke!
now i might not see it by shogunshin	May 30th, 2009 01:48:21 AM
the first trailer was not so bad. but these iron-man rip off costumes what the fuck? they could have just had the characters have super hero type strength WITHOUT the stupid armor. this trailer looks SAD.
Michael Bay would of never dropped the ball like Sommers did. by ganymede3010	May 30th, 2009 02:02:10 AM
That's why you bay-haters should cut the man some slack. You can't name another director that can shoot action sequences better then Bayformer.
God Damn It. by bonecrushersmith	May 30th, 2009 02:08:02 AM
How did they fuck this up? How the fuck hard is to make a great movie out of a great concept, with ready-built/awesome characters. Sure, tell me that I couldn't do better, but what the fuck ever. Michael Bay could have done this better. My taint could have done this better. The "speed-up" or what the fuck ever suits are extremely fucking stupid. Seriously. God Damn It. I don't normally get this mad about movies, but Jesus tap-dancing Christ how the fuck did they fuck this up so handily?
Good fucking God... by Force_McCockin	May 30th, 2009 02:16:25 AM
This turdfest has epic suck and fail written all over it. From the dialogue alone, it's something a third grader would snort at.
I didnt know... by The Fear	May 30th, 2009 02:20:11 AM
Office walls were only sheetrock. Knowing this movie exists is half the battle with my sanity.
MTV are cunts - will not watch this fucker! by Charlie & Tex	May 30th, 2009 02:21:36 AM
GI Joe will probably die a death in the UK anyway...
This one is clearly by Magnum Opus	May 30th, 2009 02:27:58 AM
for fans of the first Transformers movie. Exact same shiny, shallow look to it.
Unforgivable. by Pompoulus	May 30th, 2009 02:29:44 AM
The one thing that was essential to making this pile watchable was unique visuals. They made every goddamn Joe look identical in their identical bullshit power armor. Useless.
CAPTAIN POWER AND THE SOLDIERS OF THE FUTURE!!! by NivekJ	May 30th, 2009 02:34:24 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =M678PVOf5F0 I think these guys remade the wrong 80's property.
How can Snowjob by The Fear	May 30th, 2009 02:41:07 AM
fit his parka over that super suit?
There's a HUMAN shaped Decepticon in TINO2? by IndustryKiller!	May 30th, 2009 02:49:30 AM
The Decepticons are trying to destroy the sun?? Hahaha, THAT'S fucking priceless. That's fundamentally worse than anything in the cartoon. What a fucking joke. I can't believe anyone would want to watch ANY of these films.
VWantsRevenge do tell about Cobra Commander by IndustryKiller!	May 30th, 2009 03:01:38 AM
I know he's DUkes friends who gets injured or some shit and hten is a mad scientist. How does Levitt play him? Does he have any sort of voice? Give a synopsis of how he's involved.
Insult to injury (or bukkake): Scarlett is by Dingbatty	May 30th, 2009 03:18:29 AM
Ripcord's love interest in the movie, not Snake Eye's girlfriend (a la the Hama comic), nor Duke (the 80's toon).
One good thing -- not as many apologists by Dingbatty	May 30th, 2009 03:20:16 AM
as there were/are for Transformers (which is disappointing, as a Gen Xer who loves both properties). What a missed opportunity, given their universes often crossed over.
Baroness "nice shoes" .............. by peopleintrees	May 30th, 2009 03:28:40 AM
Are you fucking kidding me? Storm Shadow wearing a white fucking suit looking like a gay Korean pop star?!?!?!
It was massively arrogant of this production by Dingbatty	May 30th, 2009 03:36:40 AM
to disregard the design elements of the original for their sorry attempt at "updating." Most of the originals still hold up. Like the Nazis, Cobra purposely has a sharp, dramatic sense of fashion (the Nazis had their uniforms designed by Hugo Boss), which is an effective recruitment/propaganda technique. The Joes looked like real soldiers, but with a slight super-heroic quality to them, given their unique looks to complement their distinct personalities, abilities, and back stories. They also wrongly assumed their reinterpretation of the characters was better than Hama's vision, experience, and voice. Oddly enough, out of most genre properties, apart from LOTR, G.I. JOE ARAH has the most female fans, given how capable, intelligent, and cool Hama made the female characters (which is ironic, considering women barely figure into the Tolkien mythos, though I assume LOTR's recent surge in female fandom is due to the bolstering of female roles in the story by Peter Jackson for the movies, and the presence of hunky actors playing sensitive action heroes).
Though the original Baroness did have a by Dingbatty	May 30th, 2009 03:39:40 AM
high priced dominatrix's sartorial sense, so I could see her praising a woman's shoes, though she'd probably cap her for daring to show her up in her presence.
I have a question... by SunTzu77	May 30th, 2009 03:54:44 AM
How in the hell does Channing Tatum keep getting gigs?
Trey Parker and Matt Stone must be weeping by drturing	May 30th, 2009 04:10:41 AM
Team America is actually funnier in live action rather than puppets. All that hard work for nothing! If Matt Damon has a cameo in this it would be the greatest movie ever.
Was that... by yesiamaplant	May 30th, 2009 04:17:19 AM
...an American accent on The Baroness? Look goddammit, it's one thing to take the hottest piece of sexy librarian euro-trash ever created and cast a Brit in the role, but it's something else entirely to force said Brit into an AMERICAN ACCENT! AT LEAST LET HER USE HER NATURALLY, GOD-GIVEN SEXY BRITISH ACCENTEDNESS IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO FORCE HER TO GO TOTALLY PSUEDO-GERMAN!!!
What is “…1965 suck…?” by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 04:24:24 AM
'Cause 'Doctor Zhivago' and 'Thunderball' came out that year. That is a fun descriptive though…
Did anybody like the Warren Ellis penned 'GI Joe'? by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 04:25:28 AM
I thought that was top of the pops.
I'm hoping this tanks when it comes out by alienindisguise	May 30th, 2009 05:06:24 AM
There isn't one original thing in any of the clips/trailers that we've seen. This would have been so easy to get right but noooooo, all the design elements that made the characters cool in the first place have been tossed in favor of "safe" costumes. It's a bunch of fucking bullshit.
At least, JJ didn't think the past suits were dumb. Stuck with i by Se7en	May 30th, 2009 05:25:53 AM
Thus, it becomes Trek TOS. (although some may disagree). But at least he passed first base. Superman Returns didn't even pass first base because of the tweaking ( read : Plastic s-shield and muscle pads). If they thought the GI JOES suits were 'unrealistic' then why go with THE NINJA WITH THE BIG MACHINE GUN WITH THE YELLOW TIP RAY on that clip ? Dumbass suits. As, someone said above, my condolences, GI Joe geeks.
As horrible as that shit looks I might still see this.. by odo19	May 30th, 2009 05:43:39 AM
just to see how Joseph Gordon Levitt plays Cobra Commander. Here's hoping someone releases all of his footage on youtube and saves me 10.
I want to give the Baroness a BODY MASSAGE by The Amazing G	May 30th, 2009 05:56:39 AM
if you know what I mean
Wow! This Mans-formers looks great! by Meta	May 30th, 2009 06:19:31 AM
When are we going to see a trailer for G.I Joe?
The only thing that could redeem this film... by Meta	May 30th, 2009 06:23:07 AM
is if one the Joes runs in yelling "Pork Chop Sandwiches"! Or possibly if the evil Cobra super-weapon gets broken into 3 pieces and scattered around the globe. Because that's what happens to all Cobra super-weapons.
Shittiest casting ever!! by Stalkeye	May 30th, 2009 06:30:37 AM
Marlon Wayans?!? and that other no talented fucker gordon levit as Cobra commander? If Sommers took this project more seriously, he wouls have used half of the cast from tears of the sun.I rather have Cole Hauser as Duke anyday than this idiot Chad Tatum . Not to mention Monica (Belluci) as the Baroness.This movie seems marketed to sell not only toys but fucking happy meals.Workprint please.
You know a movie is gonna suck when.. by Stalkeye	May 30th, 2009 06:34:08 AM
it's scheduled for release in August.Resolute will crush this POS!And it's a 70 minute cartoon. Fuck you Sommers, you dumb ass Brit.
I gotta agree with ganymede3010 on this one by Stalkeye	May 30th, 2009 06:42:36 AM
Mikey Bay, the overrated prick that he is would never haved fucked over GIJ like sommers will.and why didnt Hama have more creative control? The same goes for hasbro?This will finish Stevie's career once and for all (if we're lucky.)
What Resolute got right, by Dingbatty	May 30th, 2009 07:06:35 AM
and what people are responding positively toward, was the serious, adult tone. Where Ellis went wrong was trying to amalgamate aspects of the cartoon with the superior comic book, with an unnecessary dash of fantastical martial arts (as opposed to grounded in real physics) and his personal obsession with tech. Nevertheless, it was miles above and beyond this Rise of Cobra dreck. The images at the links that the Green Gargantua posted above for the tie-in toys for Rise of Cobra are all you need to see to realize this movie is a huge misfire.
I think it looks by Holy Hell	May 30th, 2009 07:49:15 AM
pretty fun. I'll watch it some afternoon with reasonably low expectations and it'll meet 'em. I'm not looking for smart or some resurrection of my childhood here.
And the property by Holy Hell	May 30th, 2009 07:50:09 AM
doesn't really have "awesome" potential for a summer movie anyway.
This'll by Holy Hell	May 30th, 2009 07:53:18 AM
be like Fantastic Four. Perfectly pleasant and forgettable. Although the Silver Surfer one was memorably awful.
The 70's GI Joe was what I remember best. by Sal_Bando	May 30th, 2009 08:00:51 AM
You had a foot tall US Soldier, pretty much. Later on in the decade they gave us 'GI Joe w/ Kung Fu Grip' and one w/ a bionic eye if you can imagine it(Eagle Eye Joe?? I forget)---and there was this neato copter you could have Joe 'fly' in. But nothing about a cartoon, no cobra commander, no jets getting hit/100% of pilots ejecting safely out, 'knowing is half the bottle' etc. I associate the 80's GI Joe w/ the A-Team, Transformers, He-Man, etc. just because it was for the next group down from us. This movie could be fun, but any and all resmemblences to your Cobra Commander 80's toon or the '70's Joe (I remember my brother had one and we somehow lost his left foot....)-is purely coincidental. Sommers DID make a really fun, good B movie-the first Mummy 10 years ago. What has happened to this guy since-I donno. Bring back the '99 Sommers, and you'd have a decent flick. This guy is the Van Helsinki Sommers-no thanks.
Was there a GI Joe named Crackhead? by kafka07	May 30th, 2009 08:10:29 AM
I ask because Marlon Wayans is in this shit heap they call a movie.
Weird sentence by rfid	May 30th, 2009 08:25:37 AM
Harry wrote: "As far as I know - I don't know anyone that's seen the entire film" Harry, do you read this stuff before posting it?
LOOKS LIKE A DUMB FUN POPCORN MOVIE by BringingSexyBack	May 30th, 2009 08:33:32 AM
My brain is spending a lot of time at the door this summer.
ONLY BAD THING IS MARLON WAYANS by BringingSexyBack	May 30th, 2009 08:34:21 AM
The Wayans clan needs to go extinct. America will never be great as long as they're around.
WOW!!! by Judge Briggs	May 30th, 2009 08:55:48 AM
That looked liked SHIIIIITTTTTTTEEEEE!!!
Watch GI Resolute by shutupfanboy	May 30th, 2009 09:04:21 AM
Unbelievable ow good that was and how bad this is.
Kind Of Blah! by Darth_Kaos	May 30th, 2009 09:19:26 AM
Very underwhelming, and my I say mediocre. Why wouldn't they release a kick ass sequence? I was behind this movie since it was announced. But the more I see, the more I'm worried. No wonder Paramount isn't pushing this movie like Transformers 2. It seems, kind of. . . off. I can't explain it. I still plan to see it, but my expectations are getting lower by the day.
The things I would do to Sienna Miller... by YackBacker	May 30th, 2009 10:04:28 AM
Would last a total of 45 seconds.
power suits? by nametaken	May 30th, 2009 10:13:34 AM
adding my voice to mob of people feeling let down, power suits? why?
just looks like... by dj_bollocks	May 30th, 2009 10:49:11 AM
Mortal Kombat or Street Fighter or any other kiddie franchise bollocks
Well by Arteska	May 30th, 2009 11:26:48 AM
I realize that most people are simply spoiling to demolish this movie on principle (this site included it seems, right down to the underwhelming ... instead of !!! announcing the clip being online), but this clip is even introduced in a way that says virtually no one has seen a lick of this movie yet but its fate here is already 100% consigned. I really don't care about a GIJOE movie but I do know what shape a movie based on a toy line and the old cartoon might turn out like - and it's not the stupid "adult" approach advocated above. Adult? Really? Are you one of those that didn't like the prequels and hates Lucas forever because he didn't delve into Jedi erotica? The cartoon was fun when age appropriate and the Hama comics were entertaining soap operas for boys but stop assigning things that never existed to this stuff and wondering why it doesn't manifest itself now in a movie translation. Yeah they probably could do a solid action movie with the premise, and maybe they have, but no one really cares to find out because it's more fun to bitch and count on disappointment. You can always play-act with your action figures if this doesn't deliver whatever version of Joe you want that no two people here would agree to want to seeing. It is kind of lame that they apparently ripped off the suit (almost wholesale) from Crytek's Crysis PC game though. Not that it was a novel idea to begin with. Sgt. Slaughter and Refrigerator Perry action figures are in this toyline - stop acting like it was ever a mature endeavor.
This looks terrible... by ballsmcretard	May 30th, 2009 11:50:07 AM
of all the turds they try to force feed us this one looks particularly runny and full of corn
for once I agree with the haters by Datascream	May 30th, 2009 12:19:56 PM
This looks ludicrous! Why are there power suits? They've never used or needed anything like them in the show. Also...what the hell with that fucking dialogue? "Get OUT!! Nice shoes..." Ugh!! It seriously sounds like they hired writers from those terrible disney shows.
Needs more GIANT PIG by GIANT_PIG	May 30th, 2009 12:23:26 PM
GIANT PIG!!!
Jesus, the rifle with the glowing end looked dumb by Tacom	May 30th, 2009 12:23:41 PM
I loved the 80s cartoon and I don't mind that the Baroness doesn't have an accent but those suits! Come on!
BSB by Six Demon Bag	May 30th, 2009 12:25:23 PM
wayans was good in REQUIEM FOR A DREAM. i guess it depends on the director. everyone brought their game to that film. geez thats a rough one.
Can't view it at work... by WickedJester	May 30th, 2009 12:25:28 PM
But something tells me that might be a good thing. Someone said no Cobra Commander? I thought this was called Rise of the Cobra?
Giant Pig? by WickedJester	May 30th, 2009 12:26:33 PM
A new TB staple I missed?
You're JUST disliking a movie now datascream? by IndustryKiller!	May 30th, 2009 12:27:23 PM
You must not be a hard sell in the world of Transformers and Wolverine. This might be worse than those, but not MUCH worse.
Wayan's? Really? All that idiotic business onscreen— by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 12:28:33 PM
but, the black guy is the problem? Maybe you've been watching too much Michael Bay BringingSexyBack.
Wayans the jive talkin wise crackin soldier by Six Demon Bag	May 30th, 2009 12:31:32 PM
to bring in the urban crowd on opening weekend. you know it to be true.
The annoying token Black dude, who is always — by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 12:42:06 PM
clueless; is always barking wild, inappropriate exhortations to the rest of the cast; is always determined to exclaim their 'blackness.' Can't we retire this stereotype in the 21st Century?
Holy Shit! There is a GIANT PIG on the loose. by Continentalop	May 30th, 2009 12:55:15 PM
But I agree, everything is better with a GIANT PIG! Hence RAZORBACK is the greatest movie ever!
Arteska, Zardazap, well for something so unrealistic and childis by Continentalop	May 30th, 2009 01:06:26 PM
It is amazing that they listed their enlisted rank, MOS and secondary MOS on their profiles. I mean how many kids are gonna know that Snake-Eyes and Stalker's E-5 means they are Sergeants, or that Dukes E-8 means that he is a First Sergeant? Like I said, I could care less about the toys or comics, I care about the characters who were pretty much all created by the comic book writer Larry Hama. He wasn't trying to design toys or cartoon characters, he was trying to make interesting comic book characters that stayed true to his experiences in the Army.
Somebody, please check out Warren Ellis' "GI Joe"— by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 01:14:37 PM
Seriously, it's good.
by BeornsRevenge	May 30th, 2009 01:19:15 PM
With any luck this will bomb and not yield a franchise
But I do realize why they are going this route by Continentalop	May 30th, 2009 01:24:18 PM
HASBRO. Think about it. Do you think they wanna stay true to what Larry Hama did and make a movie that can only be appreciated by 30-somethings, or do you think they would rather make a movie that will help them move toys? HASBRO doesn't give a shit if the movie is good or there is actually a good concept amongst the GI JOE: Real Americans toy-line, they just want to make a 90 minute toy commercial. Like I said earlier, Larry Hama wasn't designing toys, he was making characters; Sommers and HASBRO are just designing toys.
Larry Hama is brilliant— by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 01:30:29 PM
and intimately involved with 'The 'Nam' from the 80's. I believe he was the editor. Michael Golden came into his own on that book. So, I think Hama's military focus was indulged by Marvel by playing to his strengths as a writer and editor. I think he was writing 'GI Joe' while editing 'The 'Nam'.
Old Larry Hama interview— by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 01:36:44 PM
http://tinyurl.com/mrxjb5
oh THE NAM!!!! i forgot about that! by Six Demon Bag	May 30th, 2009 01:37:24 PM

I agree blakindigo. Even the ninja stuff in GI JOE by Continentalop	May 30th, 2009 01:39:31 PM
Was actually well written and all Hama's idea. Hasbro wasn't thinking about making Snake-Eyes ninja trained or adding Shadowstorm. That was Hama's idea. Hama is Japanese-American, and he studied judo, Kyüdo (archery), kendo and Iaido, The guy knew his martial arts and did research on what he didn't know. While Miller usually gets all the credit for bringing ninjas into comics, I really think it was Hama who made them so popular (well, him and the TMNT).
Hama gave Ninja a credible feel; Miller popularized — by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 01:48:27 PM
them in his 'Daredevil' and 'Wolverine' books; he discovered them by way of Samurai movies. Hama had a more 'credible' feel to his Ninja, with emphasis on their'mysterious' nature. Also, at the time 'The Ninja' by Eric Van Lustbader was going to be made into a movie and that was another point of reference.
Good Lord! by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 01:48:53 PM
Is it possible that pour own real American military could like declare War on these filmmakers? Or maybe the Joes could be could be...government enlisted...by another country... If... if... I was in the military and they gave me a retarded powersuit like that...I'd be a man about it and frag myself. sniggers Rust cannon nice posts all
http://tinyurl.com/cwygsk by blakindigo	May 30th, 2009 02:19:16 PM
Enough is enough…
zom-bot.com -----EXACTLY! by BRUTICUS	May 30th, 2009 02:32:13 PM
Now if they were to mix the two they could at least know what to keep and what NOT to keep. The crap lines and cheesiness is what they should have got rid of. They should have kept the cool shit like Destros mask. THE fact that Cobra Commander is ALWAYS MASKED!!! How do you get that wrong????? Cobras identity shouldn't be revealed throughout an entire TRILOGY. But no... In this movie we're going to see CObra Commander as a small child. SO LAME!!!!
Cunts by drompter	May 30th, 2009 02:40:19 PM
Since you all have already made up your mind that this movie is going to suck even though all you have seen from it is a couple of trailers and a 30 seconds clip, then why don't you write your review already and submit it? Who knows. Perhaps the producers could take notes and decide to do some reshoots so we can have a better final product.
the entire arlington National Cemetary is rolling over in Their by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 02:57:10 PM
:D Peace to the military people serving overseas I couldn't resist
Graves by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 02:58:17 PM
-MLB snip
Gonna make Ishtar look like... by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 02:59:36 PM
Lawrence of Arabia
This is like the Go-Bot version by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 03:01:38 PM
of transformers, except it's G.I. Joe, and it sucks more
What's next? by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 03:03:09 PM
A Viking movie were they only drink tea and discuss issues?
I'll give Sommers credit, he's good for like 10 minutes a movie. by ganymede3010	May 30th, 2009 03:22:39 PM
It's the other 200 minutes I'm worried about.
I was wrong about Star trek DGDB was right but... by Mr.LordBronco	May 30th, 2009 03:24:21 PM
I don't think I'm wrong this time... -MLB
This movie will still make a ton of money. by ganymede3010	May 30th, 2009 03:26:10 PM
Which means we'll have to endure an even crappier sequel. Oh the dread.
Watched it now.. by WickedJester	May 30th, 2009 03:27:03 PM
The awfulness. Just wow.
Glad they were able to get the suits from Armageddon cheap. by WickedJester	May 30th, 2009 03:27:23 PM

Hey drumpter by Continentalop	May 30th, 2009 03:35:49 PM
You know why they release clips like this? So potential movie goers will get a taste of what it will be like and influence them to go see the movie. Well guess what? This time it backfired. If this is the best clips they can show, I think it is hard not to make an intelligent guess that this will be a flaming piece of shit. When people wondered if TDK was going to be good or if Nolan was going in the right direction, they released the bank robbing scene and that got rid of any fears that it wasn't going to work. When people worried that Iron Man was going to be cheesy, the released clips of RDJ building the armor, and everyone was pleased. Here, the best they can show is a rejected scene from GUYVER and you are bitching at us for thinking it will be shit?
Wholly SHIT! That was AWESOME!!! by Joker Gordon Levitt	May 30th, 2009 03:44:30 PM
for me to poop on.
TEAM: AMERICA made for a better G.I. Joe movie. by HEROES FOR SALE	May 30th, 2009 03:48:50 PM
WTF! I have no hope for this piece of shit. Those fucking suits are shitty Iron Man lite bullshit. Cobra Commander and Destro look like a couple of fags! Fuck you Sommers!
To help us rate this piece of shit better when it comes out... by Continentalop	May 30th, 2009 03:58:50 PM
...here is the Bristol stool chart: http://tinyurl.com/25wtok I'm guessing it will be a 7.
WHY DO THEY HAVE POWER SUITS?????????????????? by Warcraft	May 30th, 2009 04:02:29 PM
WHEN DID GI JOES EVER RUN AROUND IN FUCKING POWER SUITS? FUCK THIS STUPID MOVIE!!!
Global Suckage... by Keblar	May 30th, 2009 04:07:30 PM
is so much more entertaining than national suckage.
Why the fuck would they melt the Eiffel Tower? by stormschlong	May 30th, 2009 04:12:18 PM
Fucking morons, why don't they blow up the presidents office or something. I also agree that those powersuits are retarded, where the fuck is Bazooka with his big ass fucking Bazooka? He'll take care of business.
Ms. Miller in a leather jumpsuit.and... by BiggusDickus	May 30th, 2009 04:27:34 PM
...what? You thought there was something more? Silly boy. Wait for the MacFarlane toys and then you can wank yourself daft...
And while I'm at it... by BiggusDickus	May 30th, 2009 04:37:48 PM
...sorry, lads, but humour me, I'm a Brit. When did Nick Fury become a pissed off black American? Not got a problem with this, but it seems to cock up your continuity a tad. Don't get me wrong, but I now see NF as Sam J a la 'Pulp Fiction' and it spoils everything else for me because he's instantly twice as badass as he ever was before, know what I mean? Ah well, I guess it all makes sense to you folks...
Gotta admit it looked bad. Kinda Spy Kiddish by The Founder	May 30th, 2009 05:06:46 PM
Oh boy that cliped looked awful.
Baranoss fucked my eyeballs! by lockesbrokenleg	May 30th, 2009 05:11:45 PM
And then fucked them again!
Terrible marketing campaign by Charlie_Allnut	May 30th, 2009 05:17:12 PM
They are developing zero buzz for this movie.
It makes me bothers me to think by sfgeek	May 30th, 2009 05:30:57 PM
that GI Joe's need to wear accelerator suits to get the job done, and all Cobra needs to do is look cool. Does that even make sense? I need to move on from this clip. It is just pissing me off.
Did anyone actually think this stood a chance of being a good mo by JackBauer@CTU	May 30th, 2009 05:57:26 PM
'Cause you're silly if you did...
It's Not Sommers Fault... by DancingDwarf	May 30th, 2009 06:28:44 PM
He can't help making the movies that he makes. You know when seeing a Sommers movie what you are going to get. If you like that kind of crap, more power to you. I blame that twat Bonaventura and the cunts at Paramount for picking Sommers and allowing him to move so far from the source (Marvel Comics) material. Hasbro too. A property like the Mummy, sure take it for a spin. It's an old movie and the diehard fans are likely dead or too old to give a shit. G.I. Joe was Americana. It was a fucking brilliant comic book. It was something that I will always love. So will this film make money? Who knows? It Hasbro's intent was to sell a crap load of toys, I'm sure that fucking with the source material will have the same effect on toy sales for Hasbro as putting out three horrible prequels did to Star Wars toys. The fans of the original will just move on. What a fucking waste.
Just like I remember it... by Silverhour	May 30th, 2009 06:29:52 PM
A black MTV logo. Thanks for that. Guess I'll have to YouTube it if I really cared.
Power suits? Any excuse to use CG! by Orionsangels	May 30th, 2009 06:46:20 PM
Let's give the characters some kind of power armor suit?, so then we can make them entirely CG and climb and jump around like human monkeys. Will get great action shots. That tells the viewers that there was no danger involved in this over the top cartoony looking CG effects laden sequence.
Who said G.I. Joe wasn't a viable live action movie? by AnakinsDiapers	May 30th, 2009 07:13:10 PM
I just watched True Lies yesterday, and it still amazes me how fantastic the harrier sequences were. That's bleeding G.I. Joe right there. Real military tech with actual stunts performed by real people.
GI Joe Live Action by srocinema	May 30th, 2009 07:31:28 PM
For a take on GI Joe that actually is faithful to the 80s show check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =Fmy3OS2qvsU
Way to suck out everything cool about GI Joe by Nerd Rage	May 30th, 2009 07:35:55 PM
and throw the remains at the screen like monkey dung. Sommers has a unique talent for that. Everything he touches turns to shit.
G.I. Tract Joe by Joeyboy	May 30th, 2009 07:36:05 PM
Why do the Joes need suits to fight COBRA. The old Joes didn't.
AnakinsDiapers by codymr	May 30th, 2009 08:07:22 PM
Yup... what you just said is about right. What Sommer's has done is a fucking abortion.
"Get Out! Nice shoes." by joe90025	May 30th, 2009 08:15:51 PM
The only people who'll laugh at that line are kindergarteners and retards. I'd rather pay $100 to watch a MST3K version of this.
TOO SOON!! (Where's the Nth Man movie) by Pageiv	May 30th, 2009 10:37:23 PM
Hama rocked Joe as the writer, and "The Nam" But "Nth Man" would make a great movie (though without these grade school drop outs behind it)
damn... and i can remember when adding mere by jackknifed_juggernaut	May 30th, 2009 11:40:05 PM
flames (and lips) to a character was viewed as sacrilege. now we're dealing with fucking power suits and maskless k-pop reject ninjas? that's it. i'm done with 80s toon adaptations. now having said that, if they were ever to produce a Bravestar film...
Plot is overrated. by Evangelion217	May 30th, 2009 11:43:24 PM
Sommers isn't a great director, but atleast he knows how to take something simpler, and not over-complicate it. His films are feasts for the eyes, and he knows how to film an action sequence. And I like they completely changed "G.I. Joe" and make it fit with this modern age. Power suits are awesome!
Faux Joe!!! by nerosday	May 31st, 2009 12:31:03 AM
Continentalop has a really good point about these 80’s redux movies. The core audience of a film like this should be the original audience who are now in their thirties. A Joe movie taken seriously, with real deaths, real action, minimal CG, good old fashion practical stunts, no wire fighting bullshit, good writing, good acting, great direction, and just a touch of a winking sense of irony at knowing it is not only based in comics but a toy line, and a look that is true to the source materials; my God we would be there in droves. But lets be honest, my son who is now the age I was when I discovered Joe has little to no interest in the new toys or anything like them, nor do his friends. I think this is because they can now play war on X Box 360 and PS3. So I think the intent of making this kid friendly is a bit of a waste, the toys sales of the new stuff is nowhere near the 80’s levels, nor will they ever be. My son’s friend’s father and I both laughed however when we ran into eachother in Target the other day looking for the latest 25th Anniversary Joe figures. Now that is a devoted fan base.
CGI JOE! by AragornElfstone	May 31st, 2009 12:32:58 AM
CGI JOE! CGI JOE! CGI JOE! CGI JOE! CGI JOE!
Heh by nerosday	May 31st, 2009 12:35:09 AM
I would have laughed my ass off if in the midst of a serious GI Joe movie there was an explosion followed by one of the Joes groaning and screaming "I've Got a Screw in back! Pull it out, pull it out!"
nerosday by Dingbatty	May 31st, 2009 01:49:54 AM
Yeah, Hasbro has done quite well with the 25th anniversary line (why we got Resolute), though I'd rather see a toon closer to Hama's 80's version. There are exclusives this year at the Hasbro site, which you aren't going to be able to find at the stores, if I'm not mistaken.
We can blame Devil's Due, however by Dingbatty	May 31st, 2009 01:52:08 AM
for the Hallyu-esque Stormshadow (from G.I. Joe Reloaded): http://tinyurl.com/mbcrsg
So, they have a weapon that can melt the Eiffel tower... by kevred	May 31st, 2009 02:21:07 AM
...yet they have to CLIMB STAIRS and TAKE AN ELEVATOR to get to the ROOF? Did they spend their whole budget on the weapon, with nothing left for high-tech transportation? And this devious, high-tech organization's best method of delivering this mega-weapon is to shoot it through the window of a conference room in an office building? And the Joes have those stupid robot-monkey suits, but they're still required to RUN AFTER and TACKLE their opponents? Wouldn't jet packs and, oh, some kind of weapon that can be used at a DISTANCE have made this encounter easier? Why am I not impressed by any of this? Why is it so hard for Hollywood to get simple things right? Sigh.
GIJINO... by Boober	May 31st, 2009 02:25:25 AM
No, Sienna Miller is NOT the best pick for Baroness. See Famke Jannsen or Peta Wilson. And can we PLEASE have Stormshadow using a white suit in an arctic environment...you know, functionality AND exotic locales (two birds with one stone). Stop with the laughable shuriken "killshot" crap. Check history on how they were used. And you know, I wouldn't even mind the suits, if they could actually make them look MILITARY and less like a HALO lawsuit waiting to happen like others have posted. Why are we so angry? Because most of us are morons and WE could do better. Why not just give everyone in the movie NERF weapons to whore that toyline as well...at least it would keep our expectations in check.
I LIKE THOSE SUITS!!! :D by TheGhostWhoLurks	May 31st, 2009 02:48:45 AM
Reminds me of the book version of Starship Troopers! And would anyone REALLY want soldiers dressed in things like goofy attire like a football jersey, cowboy hat or Donald Duck sailor suit running around fighting terrorists??? C'mon! For a live action adaptation, this G.I. Joe looks pretty good, so far. Except The Baroness SHOULD have her accent (though I liked her shoe quip) and Destro SHOULD be wearing his steel helmet.
Theres nothing goofy about GIJOE uniforms by Rufferto	May 31st, 2009 03:18:49 AM
The classic uniforms were mostly standard military greens. O WAIT ya sure got me there. Cause Donald wears a sailor uniform it's totally stupid that a trained Us Navy man would wear a standard navy uniform, right? Dur hur hur. And no one is saying they had to make the characters a slave to their counterparts only recognizable and respected. Shipwreck hasn't warn a navy uniform since GI Joe was relaunched by Image and Devils Due anyway. Wild Bill is a Texan an could wear a fucking cowboy hat if he wants but I could give two shits if he was used and didn't. And Bazooka sucks. WOW-ee I see such spectacular defense for this. The even better one was that one guy says that plot is overrated.
Dingbatty GI JOE Reloaded by Rufferto	May 31st, 2009 03:30:30 AM
I agree that they went the matrix route with Storm Shadow. But he still looks better in that then he does in this movie. The costume designs are just awful. Even Storm Shadow's ninja one looks bad. Anyway, The Reloaded book actually seemed like a concept for a movie. It failed in some respects but would of been pretty outstanding in comparison to this actual film. I especially like how fleshed out the cobras were. CC's origin was touched upon and was very nicely done. I hate to admit it about anything but I enjoy the update in that. I like CC's meetings with high command cobras and especially with Destro. They didn't focus enough on the Joes and made Rock and Roll too young but other then that I think it was a pretty solid book.
I don't think Baroness place of birth by Rufferto	May 31st, 2009 03:40:41 AM
was ever declassified but yeah her accent did sound sort of German. She definitely European. I know that doesn't narrow it down much.
For those fans of the original "JOE" by Rufferto	May 31st, 2009 03:47:19 AM
Hama actually put him into the marvel book. Since he was a ranking general, much later he took over command of the Joes for Hawk.
TheGhostWhoLurks by Dingbatty	May 31st, 2009 06:55:22 AM
Please find your nearest Fleet Week this summer, and go mock their uniforms to their faces.
Is this a remake or a reboot? by Donkey_Lasher	May 31st, 2009 07:09:32 AM
And is it a PG13?
Of course it doesn't yell "Go Joe! by Alkeoholic77	May 31st, 2009 09:54:27 AM

Of course it doesn't yell "Go Joe!" by Alkeoholic77	May 31st, 2009 09:55:28 AM
Because they yell Yo Joe. No SGT. Slaughter, no sell.
WOW... by braddavery	May 31st, 2009 10:56:44 AM
...does this look like a wreaking pile of shit.
I am SO GLAD I wasn't a GI-Joe kid... by GreenRiver	May 31st, 2009 11:20:53 AM
...more of a Transformers and Masters follower. Nonetheless, as a fellow child of the 80s, I feel for those who were. Of course, this movie could still turn out decent for all I know, but everything I've seen so far FEELS wrong. I never saw the cartoon much...more into the Marvel comics. But despite all the fancy gadgetry, the Joe always seemed AUTHENTIC as a real-life fighting force. The interactions between the Joe crew, as written by Hama, convinced me they were a modern day military unit. To me, that was the key. In contrast, I'm getting an overblown, CGI-infested Thunderbirds-vibe from this.
Just noticing by browncoat_skyfan	May 31st, 2009 11:40:02 AM
Baroness looks the way I imagine ScriptGirl should look, full figure? Maybe it's the glasses! It's cheesy not doing a proper accent; if not prussian/austrian then at least a sinister eastern-bloc one...
T4 = BOMB! by Six Demon Bag	May 31st, 2009 12:23:27 PM
Box Office Chart of the top 10 movies this week Top Movies Weekend Gross* Number of Screens Per-Screen Average Weeks in Release Gross to Date* 1 Up Buena Vista $68.2 3766 $18109 1 $68.2 2 Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian Fox $25.5 4101 $6218 2 $105.3 3 Drag Me to Hell Universal $16.6 2508 $6630 1 $16.6 4 Terminator Salvation Warner Bros $16.1 3602 $4481 2 $90.7 5 Star Trek Paramount $12.8 3507 $3650 4 $209.5 6 Angels & Demons Sony $11.2 3464 $3233 3 $104.8 7 Dance Flick Paramount $4.9 2459 $1993 2 $19.2 8 X-Men Origins: Wolverine Fox $3.9 2263 $1723 5 $170.9 9 Ghosts of Girlfriends Past Warner Bros $1.9 1450 $1314 5 $50.0 10 Obsessed Screen Gems $0.7 679 $979 6 $67.5 See movie grades from critics and readers
Am I the only one... by mponte10006	May 31st, 2009 01:09:42 PM
that finds the acting in the first trailer, and the little in this one, to be terrible? When the actress I assume is Lady Jane screams "Eject" I want to throw things. and "Its only just begun"?! Come one.
Aeon Flux 2 by guerillakarma	May 31st, 2009 03:17:06 PM
This clip kinda reminds me of Aeon Flux.
Rational thoughts by Unnatural	May 31st, 2009 03:50:29 PM
Sommers had a chance to do something very cool. This country has two very decisive wars going on that many feel are unjust, while others think are absolutely necessary. Our veterans coming home are largely ignored -- at least they are not being spit on. Here is a chance to make a realistic movie about our armed forces fighting a terrorist organization. Show how they work together and the dedication they have to their country and each other. What do we get? The fucking Power Rangers. This summer is a loss for me. Star Trek was decent, but I'm not sure what else I should be looking forward to, because this shit isn't going to play. I will be keeping my $10, thankyouverymuch.
Chill by Batlash	May 31st, 2009 04:23:13 PM
I'm glad I don't suffer from GI-Joe Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. I'll be able to watch this movie and enjoy it purely for the bombastic summer popcorn trash it most certainly will be.
Gee, I can't wait to miss this one! by Citizen Sane	May 31st, 2009 04:37:45 PM

GI JOE: Scarlett vs Baronness lesbian lovefest by jgmamma0	May 31st, 2009 05:06:32 PM
That movie will make more than this crap especailly the 69ing, dildos, and tribbing involved. I expect to reserve my copy from Vivid by September this year.
G.I.R.O.N.M.A.N. by Immortal_Fish	May 31st, 2009 06:04:36 PM
What's the source material for this latest piece of drek?
It's "YO Joe!" by Hellboy	May 31st, 2009 07:48:12 PM
If yer gonna be a nerd, be accurate.
This is going to be an awful... by porterdsgn	May 31st, 2009 07:58:37 PM
...piece of shit. I had such high hopes when I saw the first publicity photos. I actually didn't mind the black suites. But the first time I heard the words "Accelerator Suits", I knew it was the end. This has NO hope!
Heh. "Nice shoes." by SpacePhil	May 31st, 2009 08:55:34 PM
That was a nice line. At least it looks like the villains are having fun.
G.I. JINO by Stereotypical Evil Archer	May 31st, 2009 10:46:42 PM

G.I. JINO by Stereotypical Evil Archer	May 31st, 2009 10:47:06 PM

Damned-Dirty-Ape by MegaBeth	Jun 1st, 2009 03:49:30 PM
Sorry sugar.. didn't mean to scare ya! :)

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