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Cohen & Diesel Rev Up xXx: THE RETURN OF XANDER CAGE!!

testing 1 2 3 by xega	Oct 29th, 2008 11:30:56 AM
test
First......... by TheTaf	Oct 29th, 2008 11:33:59 AM
..to say this movie will suck ASS!!
FIRST???? by CloneWars	Oct 29th, 2008 11:34:05 AM
Didn't the writers kill off Xander Cage in the sequel???
Bitches, leave then Bitches, come... by Brendon	Oct 29th, 2008 11:34:50 AM
...Bitches, hang around is next? Bitches, in, out and shake it all about?
Bitches Come by ragermac	Oct 29th, 2008 11:34:56 AM
I am not first.
Vin is desperate and COHEN is the new RATNER! by ABking	Oct 29th, 2008 11:36:39 AM
This smells like shit...
FINALLY! by Zeegloo	Oct 29th, 2008 11:40:04 AM
:-\|
So Vin is comi by versatol	Oct 29th, 2008 11:41:11 AM

So Vin is comi by versatol	Oct 29th, 2008 11:41:11 AM

Is it (xx)x^3 or is it x(x(x^3)) or (xxx)^3 ? by Baron Karza	Oct 29th, 2008 11:41:17 AM
This transitive property of movie titles is confounding and shit.
So Vin is coming back for sequels that... by versatol	Oct 29th, 2008 11:42:19 AM
... he originally thought he was too big for... but then sadly realized that he is not...
That's One Pathetic Title by Crow3711	Oct 29th, 2008 11:45:05 AM
The Return of Xander Cage? Yikes. Like he was such an interesting character to begin with? Here's a real question, two parter. What is the worse movie; XxX:SotU or Transporter 2? Followed by what will be worse; XxX: RoXG or Transporter 3?
I need 4 Fast 4 Furious now! by Spandau Belly	Oct 29th, 2008 11:47:28 AM
Why are they making me wait until summer? It's clearly finished. I had this dream of seeing it and Transporter 3 in the cinema in one day and then morhping into a car and now that dream is gone. Oh well, summer will be fine too.
Crow3711... by MCVamp	Oct 29th, 2008 11:51:15 AM
Transporter 2. But just barely.
Baron Karza by Holodigm	Oct 29th, 2008 11:52:03 AM
xXxxXxxXx
That's awesome by Thick McRunFast	Oct 29th, 2008 11:55:59 AM
Me and my brother-in-law were the only ones who LOL'd at that line in the theater; nice to see someone else got a kick out of it.
The things he's going to do for his country by Darth Busey	Oct 29th, 2008 12:02:04 PM
apparently include disappearing from all movie theaters for a 5 year period. Welcome back, Vin.
That was stolen from Robocop except it was by Grammaton Cleric Binks	Oct 29th, 2008 12:07:18 PM
Bitches leave. Someone needs to loop these two together. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =-W6cT3Tvu9g&feature=related
Wait...I thought he was dead?! by AgentArchangel	Oct 29th, 2008 12:11:40 PM
How are they going to deal with this? They should have him face Jack Bauer in this one, so he'll stay dead. In all seriousness, who's bright idea was it for this to happen? Last I checked, xXx State of the Union was a disaster, and xXx didn't exactly heat up anyone's leftovers. Does this mean I can hold out for a Rocketeer sequel after all?
xXx: The Return of Xander Cage?????? by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 29th, 2008 12:13:23 PM
Possibly the shittest name in history. Even worse than Ballistic: Ecks Vs Sever! I'm sure in the sequel they said the first xxx died. Or maybe that was Diesels career. I thought he was in trouble when he went back to fast n furious. This is the last nail in Diesels career coffin.
Robert Crais by stvnhthr	Oct 29th, 2008 12:14:17 PM
Would someone stick a Robert Crais novel featuring Joe Pike and Elvis Cole into Vin's hands. Vin Diesel is such a perfect match for the Pike character I can't read one of the Cole novels without picturing Vin and hearing his voice. Plus the novels are smart and are great character pieces. Done correctly this is a series which could outshine the Bourne movies. Plus it is about 10xxx better than the tripe which was xXx.
This will only be salvaged if... by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 29th, 2008 12:17:33 PM
Diesel shakes with rage while looking through x-ray specs again...
Wasn't Xander Cage on Buffy? by Darth Macchio	Oct 29th, 2008 12:23:27 PM
I hear Vin's doing the "Breakin'" remake..had to dust off his old 'too fresh' moves from his youth. Balls on windmills and the like.
Vin's Nobody-Gives-a-Fuck Trifecta by Liberty Valance	Oct 29th, 2008 12:25:31 PM
C'mon Vin, sign on for that 3rd Riddick movie like 6 people in world still want and completely rape you early-career successes. And if you're truly upset about lack of continuity in the XXX series, your life is now officially worthless.
This "franchise" should be renamed to "x_x" by JackPumpkinhead	Oct 29th, 2008 12:37:00 PM
For the "x" in each eye of Diesel's current career.
xXx: The Return Of Zombie Xander Cage by skimn	Oct 29th, 2008 12:39:55 PM
Yes it was referred in the 2nd that he had died, but since Ice Cube didn't set the franchise on fire (gee, really? He's such a charismatic actor), bring Vin back as Zombie Xander...BRAIIINNSS!!
sign vin to a 10 pic deal by mygirleatsbannanas	Oct 29th, 2008 01:00:03 PM
and then make none of them.
Xander Cruise in... Frisy Dingo the Movie XXX by Squashua	Oct 29th, 2008 01:08:38 PM
That I'd see.
The Chronicles of XXX by Spamgelus	Oct 29th, 2008 01:08:39 PM
Screw XXX, let's get another Riddick movie.
Needs to do the Iron Giant Sequel Movie by Squashua	Oct 29th, 2008 01:09:59 PM
Iron Giant XXX. Anniston was a hot mom in that.
stvnhthr, I like the way you think by bravogolfhotel	Oct 29th, 2008 01:10:20 PM
Who would be Elvis, though? The part needs somebody who's conventionally masculine but not hypermasculine, and sardonic without overdoing it.
Cohen is shockingly inept by kwisatzhaderach	Oct 29th, 2008 01:17:02 PM

COHEN's DAYLIGHT starring SYLVESTER STALLONE... by ABking	Oct 29th, 2008 01:34:57 PM
...wasn't bad...but he's a hack. DRAGON: THE BRUCE LEE STORY was his only solid movie.
stvnhthr... by akiraclass	Oct 29th, 2008 01:42:00 PM
From Wikipedia: 'Crais refuses to sell the rights to Cole, Pike, and his other recurring characters, preferring to allow his readers to keep their own personal conceptions of the characters.' I would love to see those guys up on the big screen-for some reason I always pictured Richard Tyson circa his 'Three o' Clock High' days as Pike--go figure...
Seriously, Vid Diesel could have been up there with Arnold.. by dr sauch	Oct 29th, 2008 01:51:18 PM

dr sauch by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 29th, 2008 02:05:27 PM
He's certainly modelled his career after him... He's had a raw deal type revenge flick, some sci-fi, a kindergarten cop type one, a true lies spy one and apparently some conan type one called Hannibal the Conqueror thats yet to be made... But all these are pale imitations... there can be only one Arnie...
XXX...One of three movies I've ever walked out of a theater on by Corterville	Oct 29th, 2008 02:06:43 PM
What a piece of shit that movie was.
Vin is headed in the way of... by El Gooche	Oct 29th, 2008 02:07:57 PM
Andrew "Lattimer/Leatherface" Bryniarski. Too bad too, I thought "Multi Facial" showed a lot of promise. Gotta rein in that ego, Vin.
BUT... by El Gooche	Oct 29th, 2008 02:09:31 PM
You were the BOMB in Pitch Black, yo!
Yeah Vin Could have been great by Charlie_Allnut	Oct 29th, 2008 02:09:51 PM
In the tradition of Arnold and Bruce, but he has made some really really bad decisions. Now he 40 something without a hit in years. Its too bad really.
This premise is cheesy in todays world by BurgerKing	Oct 29th, 2008 02:15:28 PM
Sorry but a hardcore secret agent named xXx with it tattooed on him and he like skateboards on metal sheets was cool to me when I was just entering high school, today I don't think anyone would care for such a cheesy premise.
finally... someone gives the "BITCHES COME!" line it's shine by turketron	Oct 29th, 2008 02:28:25 PM
My friends and I fucking LOL'd at that when we saw the movie in theaters. That was seriously the best part of the whole movie. BITCHES COME!!! and then bitches appear from a fucking hole in the wall. EPIC GANGSTERDOM
XXX: XENU'S XYLOPHONE XZIBIT by turketron	Oct 29th, 2008 02:29:51 PM
PIMP MY THETANS
BITCHES COME! by El Gooche	Oct 29th, 2008 02:34:19 PM
My cousin and I still use that line when we are leaving somewhere with our wives.
The Return of Xander Cage? by Ribbons	Oct 29th, 2008 02:36:08 PM
Um, I ain't no fancy studio executive Mr. Cohen, but I can tell you right now that you'll be doing your movie a favor if you lose that subtitle. Nobody cares about Xander Cage, or even knows who he is, for that matter.
When no one goes to see this... by Bass Bastardson	Oct 29th, 2008 02:36:38 PM
That will be the end of Vin.
XxX2 one of the worst/Spy's gotta eat by Larry Sellers	Oct 29th, 2008 02:43:40 PM
A friend forced me to watch XxX when it first came out and I was really surprised at how much I didn't hate it. I hate extreme sports (especially movies that essentially advertise them), and most "spy" flicks. But it worked for me. It wasn't boring, didn't resort to MOST cliches used by these types of films, and I've got nothing against Vin Diesel. I did, however, catch XxX2 on cinemax a while ago and it was really awful. Bad FX, bad story, bad Ice Cube.
you've failed the test. by tvs_frank	Oct 29th, 2008 02:46:07 PM
the Gibbons' test. we all know Diesel's gotta eat,but seriously?
Who the fuck is Xander Cage? by kungfuhustler84	Oct 29th, 2008 02:52:20 PM
I wish I had remembered that line for back when I lived with my girlfriend and her three roommates in their house. BITCHES COME!
xXx: State of the Union was AWESOME! by s0nicdeathmonkey	Oct 29th, 2008 02:57:55 PM
totally idiotic on an epic scale but no one in the movie seemed willing to admit it and wink at the camera. That film is a classic of camp cinema. Bring on part 3, but only if it continues the downward trajectory of this series. The first was bottom of the barrel. The second one was some type of acid that dug through to the ground. This one...I'm hoping it can hit a sewer system.
I'm all for this sequel. by rsanta74	Oct 29th, 2008 03:08:39 PM
I was shit disappointed by XxX:SotU and that they fucking killed Xander. While the original XxX was nothing more than "extreme" James Bond, it did rock the shit. Which is why I was so pissed off to see Vin replaced with Ice Cube. A potential upside to this, for all you haters, is that there's always the potential for Sam Jackson's "scarface" boss character to return. More Sam Jackson == More badassery. Yeah. It does seem like Vin's desperately trying to make up for shit like "Babylon AD" or "The Pacifier", but can you blame him? One minute, he's packing in theaters. The next, he's packing groceries at Pathmark. =) I'm looking forward to XxX 3. This is what they really should have done in the first place - instead of SotU. As far as Xander Cage being "dead".... Did you see a body? I didn't see a body. In the movies, if you don't see the body he just ain't dead. OR... As the movie Soapdish suggested.... Decapitated? Just sew the damn thing back on. =P
xXx: The Return of the Shittiest Actor Alive by beatleMatt	Oct 29th, 2008 03:12:39 PM
This is going to SERIOUSLY suck ass, and appeal only to those who've had lobotomies, or the mentally retarded.
NONE OF YOU BITCHES JUDGE ME! by spud mcspud	Oct 29th, 2008 03:17:06 PM
I am looking forward to XXX3. I'm looking forward to RIDDICK 3. I think I can live without PACIFIER 2, but then I never got my KINDERGARTEN COP 2, so, like, whatever. I like what the Vin brings to his movies: a muscular, almost-mute force of nature, the likes of what Arnie brought to movies like the first TERMINATOR back in the day. And I don't hear you bitches calling popcorn cheesefests like COMMANDO, PREDATOR, RAW DEAL, RUNNING MAN etc down - and why? Because dumb shit has a place in cinema. There is NOTHING wrong in having action movies that give us nothing but gratuitous gore, explosions and nearly-titties - not a goddamn thing. And I'm NOT gonna apologise for wanting some dumb shit to go with my pizza and beer at the weekend. So - I'm not ashamed to say - welcome back, Vin. Take your place alongside Jason Statham and give us some more of this action greatness. xXx had some shit lines ("Welcome to the Xander Zone"? WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?) but it was a lot of fun, and God knows we need that next to all this po-faced Jason-Bourne-wannabe post-Brosnan JAMES BLAND we're getting lately (can Daniel Craig take this pulp shit any more seriously? Dude, you're James Bond! And don't get me started on Christian "Batman is like soooo deep" Bale, FFS...). Bottom line: in the same way I liked DEATH RACE - a mindless auto-wrecking Saturday night violencefest - I can't wait to see XXX£. About motherfuckin' time. Forget about the Cube (Slower. Fatter. Less able to act) and BRING ON THE VIN! Maybe one day Vin'll finally get to do OTHELLO - come on, you know that'd at least be intriguing enough for a big-screen viewing - but for now, big guy, give us what we want. More Xander Cage, more Riddick, a little more Dominic Toretto. Then go do the actorly stuff...
Will he get to awkwardly kiss a super-hot chick in this one too? by MaxTheSilent	Oct 29th, 2008 03:24:14 PM
That's the funniest on-screen kiss ever.
The Pacifier: The Return of Shane Wolfe by p0llk4t	Oct 29th, 2008 03:39:11 PM
Here's hoping it gets the greenlight...got my fingers crossed
THE RETURN OF RIDDICK! by UMAGA	Oct 29th, 2008 03:40:52 PM
GET THE FUCK ON IT ALREADY GODDAMNIT.
Hey Sony sell this Idea to Fox by Phategod2	Oct 29th, 2008 03:45:47 PM
Then they'll be ripe for a take over.
Ha! Hey Mcspud! by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 29th, 2008 03:56:02 PM
You inadvertantly came up with what this piece of shit should be called... xxx£!!! Better yet... xxx£: The Return of the Cash Hungry Whores! Genius!
Asia Argento better be in this or No Sale by Stuntcock Mike	Oct 29th, 2008 04:03:17 PM
Man, I'd lick that from Stem to Stern.
The sequel to a sequel that nobody asked for is being made by Pissed Off And Bitter	Oct 29th, 2008 04:31:51 PM
Damn, Vin, I bet it sucks knowing you passed on King Conan and are now relegated to doing this again. Way to go dude!!
i like rob cohen... by Archive	Oct 29th, 2008 04:36:09 PM
I had to avoid caps there - my very words are ducking in anticipation. Now, hear me out. He was the wrong choice to direct Brendan Fraser. Brendan is one of the most talented movement actors working today, and Rob is someone who stops time and stops the movie to deliver a catchphrase or a visual punchline. Sommers and Fraser were funny together because they got the kinetics of the Mummy - everything Brendan said was in contrast to something he was DOING. That said, Stealth, xXx, and The Fast and the Furious were all good projects for Rob Cohen, where stopping things every now and again let the audience catch up and enjoy the movie more. Vin Diesel clearly enjoys this kind of filmmaking as well, and in that sense is kind of the opposite of Dwayne Johnson. Like Arnold, Vin Diesel doesn't mind stopping the action to wink at the audience, and no film is as self-aware, while simultaneously being as in-the-moment, as xXx. Clearly, Vin's attempts to diversify his career haven't panned out the way he wanted, and I think he's probably been miscast more than once and is suited for some much stronger roles than he has access to at the moment, but for right now, I could use another xXx movie from Rob Cohen and Vin Diesel.
DerLanghaarige by Archive	Oct 29th, 2008 04:40:07 PM
No, sir. First off, nobody is saying that Colin Farrell or Jude LAw are megatalents. That said, everything I just said about Brendan Fraser applies doubly to Jude Law, and even his canniest performances reveal a mastery of his body in space. As far as Colin Farrell, I never doubt the man's honesty. That's a hell of a thing about an actor's work, my friend.
Rob Cohen could have been a great filmmaker by Pissed Off And Bitter	Oct 29th, 2008 04:44:41 PM
But then he decided to do movies that only appeal to the lowest common denominator. Cmon, Dragon was a kick ass movie, one of my all time favorites. Then he goes on to make Daylight. One of the most boring, shitty movies I've ever seen. It's been downhill ever since. I think if he had a more discriminating mind about scripts, he could have been a great action director, yes, I think his potential is still there and is a better director than Michael Bay. But then again, my grandma is better director than Michael Bay.
Archive... by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 29th, 2008 04:44:42 PM
Stealth, xXx, and The Fast and the Furious were good projects for Rob Cohen... and thats about it.
FUCK MICHAEL BAY!!! by Pissed Off And Bitter	Oct 29th, 2008 04:46:17 PM
Can't stress that enough.
I'd really like to find the right role by Archive	Oct 29th, 2008 04:48:23 PM
to take Vin Diesel to the next level of his career. At the same time, it's going to be something very specific. Casting directors need to stop trying to shoehorn the lad into "deep, wounded tough guy" shticks. The closest anyone's gotten is Boiler Room, but that wasn't quite it either.
Vin Diesal should have been one of the great action heroes. by hallmitchell	Oct 29th, 2008 04:48:54 PM
Yet he may have blown it. He started out making good innovative movies. I just feel he didn't ride the wave he was building after XXX and Fast and Furious. Why hasn't Vin taken on what I feel would be his bread and butter roles? E.g. Comic book or Fantasy? If you are making XXX3. Get Stallone on Board. Have him kick your ass. Get Seagal on Board. I want an eighties action hero on board.
I liked the first one. But that's one pompous title. by Mr Nicholas	Oct 29th, 2008 04:49:57 PM

Innovative? by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 29th, 2008 04:57:29 PM
WTF? XXX was a fucking meathead rip off of Bond and The Fast and the Furious was a fucking rip off of Point Break. Diesel shaking with rage as he looks through some x-ray specs has to be one of the most ridiculous things i've ever seen. Diesels been in one good film, and that was Saving Private Ryan.
Vin Diesel won't be an action hero until he has a mullet! by Snake Foreskin	Oct 29th, 2008 05:10:36 PM
Until then, he's just another pussified poser. Come to think of it, we need a president with a mullet. Do you think Barack Obama would grow one if it would get him elected? I kind of think it would be hard for him. He'd end up looking more like Rick James. That's no damn good! Think about it; we've had great action heroes as president before: George Washington, Ulysses Grant, Teddy Roosevelt, Dwight Eisenhower, and, of course, George W. Bush. The U.S. president could once again be one of the great action heroes! All he needs is a mullet. John McCain is sort of an action hero. How do you think he would look with a mullet? That should be the new criteria for how we elect a president. The mullet factor. No mullet? No vote.
By the way, BLU-RAY IS DEAD!!! by Snake Foreskin	Oct 29th, 2008 05:11:21 PM
Check it out: http://blogs.zdnet.com/storage /?p=365&tag=nl.e550
spud mcspud by mr.brownstone	Oct 29th, 2008 05:41:38 PM
Testify!
the "Return of" thing only works by I Dunno	Oct 29th, 2008 05:51:55 PM
if you know who the fuck the person returning is. "Return of Michael Myers"... Right on. "Batman/Superman Returns"... Hell yeah, I feel you. "The Invisible Man Returns"... I haven't seen that bastard in forever, what's he up to? "The Return of Xander Cage"... yeah I...wait, what?
I actually want to see another Riddick movie by I Dunno	Oct 29th, 2008 05:59:35 PM
No, the Chronicles of Riddick wasn't the greatest movie ever made but they took a stab at creating a new sci-fi universe not based on a comic book, video game or even a novel. Everyone bitches and rightfully so, that no one tries anything new in Hollywood but Vin Diesel did and it really didn't completly suck. I haven't seen the animated Riddick thing yet but I'm guessing there's a pretty good franchise in there somewhere.
THE PACIFIER 2 by alice 13	Oct 29th, 2008 06:13:48 PM
coming soon!!!!!!!
Right, someone needs dick punching. by IAmMrMonkey!	Oct 29th, 2008 06:14:55 PM
XXX was lukewarm shit. XXX2: WHATEVER THE FUCK IT WAS CALLED was a big steaming turd. I'm going to have dickpunch Vin and Cohen over this idea. That's right boys, you're getting punched in the dick. Which sounds gay but isn't and is going to hurt like hell. Hopefully. Remember: you had this coming.
Straight to Video or a SciFi Original? by A-COD	Oct 29th, 2008 06:22:38 PM
If you would have told Vin 5 years ago he'd be doing XXX and Fast and the Furious Sequels I wonder what he would have said. He should do a sitcom with Shelly Long.
Rob Cohen is way more interesting as a producer by chaplinatemyshoe	Oct 29th, 2008 06:27:40 PM
As a director, the closest thing he's come to compelling was The Rat Pack.
Droid, by Archive	Oct 29th, 2008 06:53:38 PM
I'm not suggesting that these are seminal action films, although xXx may be that, in hindsight. What I am saying is that Rob Cohen hit the right notes and made those movies fun to watch. In my opinion, Stealth is the best Stealth it can be. I liked it better than Firefox, anyhow - even though the Russian sidekick and the arctic submarine stuff with Firefox make it a tough call. I left the theater pleased, although not deeply satisfied. Believe me - I'm not one of those guys telling you to shut your brain off. At the same time, there are things Rob Cohen is very good at, and when a story comes along that puts those talents to work, it can be worth seeing. My opinion is that The Return of Xander is likely to be exactly that kind of story, and Vin will keep things on track to deliver laughs and a plot worthy of the James Bond world they're making fun of. Honestly, xXx was better than most of the Roger Moore Bonds, and as a youth, Moonraker was an object of my infatuation. Seeing something silly like that, with the intensity and focus of Rob Cohen behind it, could be just what my Friday night needs. With James Bond chasing the heels of Jason Bourne, where else are we gonna get the silly?
xXx reminded me of the Arnold movies by Archive	Oct 29th, 2008 06:56:41 PM
in that it was clear the folks on set were having unbelievable fun, and I found it infectious.
Thought the character died in film 2 by ukharry1971	Oct 29th, 2008 07:03:27 PM

why are there two !'s behind this story heading? by TooWhippy	Oct 29th, 2008 07:13:38 PM

BITCHES COME!! by Pissed Off And Bitter	Oct 29th, 2008 07:16:01 PM
The only endearing memory of a Vin Diesel movie.
Wonder if SLJ will come back... by Goldfingah	Oct 29th, 2008 07:18:25 PM
...considering he's gone from playing a Nick Fury knock-off to the actual Nick Fury. I won't join the predictable chorus of "this film will suck balls/shit/obscenity of choice" but I have no interest in this film. I AM interested, however, in the thought of "sequels that no one thought would be made" like The Rocketeer 2. They could replace Bill Campbell with some other square-jawed guy like James Marsden, and Jennifer Connelly with Scarlett Johansson, who may not have the face but who could definitely have W.C. Fields "doubly pleased." Of course, with Iron Man having done flying effects VERY well The Rocketeer 2 may seem like old hat considering that the only thing Cliff Secord CAN do is fly, but they could sell it with the whole pulpy, 30s vibe.
Vin doing a sitcom with Shelly Long? by the milf lover	Oct 29th, 2008 07:29:00 PM
I guess Long could play Vin's mom....
and when is Sky Captain 2 coming out?? by the milf lover	Oct 29th, 2008 07:32:04 PM
that was a fun, original (ie not a remake or based on a comic/novel/whatever) pulpy sci-fi movie... just replace Paltrow with a decent actress and we're good to go!
The Return of Who Gives A Fuck? by Thunderbolt Ross	Oct 29th, 2008 07:46:59 PM
Blaaaaaoooooow
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Than it will stop. by Roketopunch	Oct 29th, 2008 07:48:36 PM
Awesome, another idiotic movie for idiotic people for and idiotic star named Vin Diesel.
Vin by Thunderbolt Ross	Oct 29th, 2008 07:51:53 PM
Vin Diesel seemed like he might be a viable star until he began to think he could be a viable star, then decided he WAS a viable star ... then decided he was a fuckin' superstar. He thinks he's so cool, and that my friends is annoying.
....and no one gives a fucking rat's ass by Gungan Slayer	Oct 29th, 2008 07:58:40 PM
This project can burn in shitty movie hell, along with the first two films, as well as Cohen's other shitfests. Everyone remember when Diesel remember was too good to appear in sequels, and was aiming for high profile projects? Uh, huh, yeah. Fast and Furious...yeah...now this...Piece of shit movie.
cant be worse than Babylon AD by the milf lover	Oct 29th, 2008 09:44:06 PM
which is probably what made him rethink his "no sequels" policy
Wasn't he directing "Hannibal?" by Gozu	Oct 29th, 2008 11:02:21 PM
What happened to that? That sounded cool. What sucks is he's actually a charismatic lead who keeps getting sucked into shitty action films.
The next one should be... by MCVamp	Oct 29th, 2008 11:58:19 PM
Cedric the Entertainer IS... XXXL
WOW - WHAT A JOKE by geraldbeans	Oct 30th, 2008 12:48:34 AM
He's fallen this far? Remember when he laughed at the idea of doing a XXX sequel. That first movie was awful. It was a bunch of B-movie stunts wrapped around a "story". I understand he wants to get back in the game (and this is why actors are advised not to do sequels right away - cause when their careers go bad they can always go back to them for the guaranteed buck) but this wreaks of patheticness.
Whats the first thing you think when you hear Vin Diesel? by tbransonlives	Oct 30th, 2008 01:06:45 AM
Me? Washed up queen.
Holy fuck XXX was stupid.... by Playkins	Oct 30th, 2008 02:55:29 AM
...and it even "tried" to make fun of 007. XXX is not even the beginning of a pimple on James Bond's ass. Fuck Xander Cage, the movie is still going to be lame. About all I could think of when I saw the original was some studio schlub saying, "OK, I got an idea... 007 meets extreme sports... and there will be all kinds of pointless X Games events tossed in so that the stupid teenagers that go gaga over this will actually think it's an original idea..."
The only XXX I want to see by deanbarry	Oct 30th, 2008 03:21:27 AM
is the porn version of In Diana Jones.
tbransonlives: by drturing	Oct 30th, 2008 03:33:31 AM
that was amazing, but you forgot to say it like this: washed up dungeons and dragons playing queen. what do you want to bet dude used to hang out on Gor IRC channels.
mr brownstone by spud mcspud	Oct 30th, 2008 04:43:44 AM
Come up in my eye lookin' extra fly. Gonna touch the sky, gonna touch the sky. Ahem. There's a lot of strong feelings on here for such a disposable franchise. And I'm glad others noticed that TFATF was basically POINT BREAK in cars - I always get so annoyed that Paul Walker doesn't say "Vaya Con Dios" to Vin as he drives off in Paul's 10-second car. Ah well...
I Dunno by spud mcspud	Oct 30th, 2008 04:49:36 AM
Well said on the RIDDICK franchise - and yes, the DARK FURY cartoon is fun. The great thing is that the RIDDICK universe is so noticeably different, yet retains an aesthetic that is still quite unique - gothic medieval with high-tech trappings - and is a million times more fun to watch than any numbers of George Lucas shitquels. I really don't get why all the hate for the RIDDICK movies - they were original, imaginative, and well constructed, and gave us the best anti-hero since Snake Plissken (not a patch on the great Jack Burton though ;D), so - quit complaining, the rest of you bitches. I Dunno and I are just glad it's not another fucking remake (the next exec to use the word "reimagining", I'm going to hijack a deep black project military satellite, aim it at his genitalsd, and burn them off in a needle-thin stream of superheated laser particles. Fuckers). XXX£ (as it will now be known) is welcome at my house, pull up a chair, grab a beer and some pizza, and laugh heartily at the next instalment of Xander Cage's adventures. BITCHES COME!!!
Playkins - XXX>BOND by spud mcspud	Oct 30th, 2008 04:53:11 AM
Mainly because Daniel Craig is so painfully fucking earnest about the "reality" of the role - you're JAMES FUCKING BOND, YOU TWAT!!! - that he's sucked all the fun out of the franchise. Sure, now it's ripping off the BOURNE franchise (which itself, like XXX, was trying to demonstrate the staleness of BOND by doing a DECENT spy movie for once) it LOOKS better, but let's face it, when BOND is ripping off superior spy franchises that themselves ripped off BOND, you know it's going under. Again. The last franchise to rip off a later franchise that was based on the former was INDIANA JONES ripping off THE MUMMY with those ridiculous man-eating ants, and we all know how well THAT turned out...
xXx was good fun by Mr Gorilla	Oct 30th, 2008 05:05:29 AM
...until after the avalanche sequence. Then all the stars and stripes etc got on everyone's nerves. SHAME! That first half hour was good fun.
How are the Bourne movies classified as spy movies? by I_am_not_the_droid_you_are_looki ng_for	Oct 30th, 2008 05:32:29 AM
Prior to losing his memory, Jason Bourne was a trained assassin. Subsequent to losing his memory, he was a guy who, with the aid of shakey-cam and nausea inducing editing, busted heads in various semi exotic locales. Does looking through binoculars and performing a little B&E classify itself as being a spy these days? Hey director, do we have a scene where Bourne throws down with another super assassin? Check. Is it set in a different part of the house, you know, so the audience won’t think we’ve just repeated ourselves? Check. Do we have a scene where Bourne drives at high speeds through peak hour traffic? Check. Is anything of interest ever explained? Che… Wait… Are you nuts? Why waste time on story when we can have Bourne perform more over-edited chop-socky? Ok, my rant is nearing an end. Although I thoroughly enjoyed The Bourne Identity, the sequels are SHIT! And at no point in Casino Royale did I think they were trying to imitate Bourne. Lastly, there is some humour in Casino Royale, just no groan inducing ‘I thought Christmas only came once a year.’ double entendres. And I’d prefer to keep that way.
he should remake Commando.... by j2talk	Oct 30th, 2008 06:26:46 AM

Respect for DRAGON though... by spud mcspud	Oct 30th, 2008 07:28:33 AM
Rob Cohen DID make DRAGON, though, for which he earns our undying respect. One of the greatest biopics EVER, and Jason Scott Lee really pulls off what, for hi8m, must surely be the role of a lifetime. Spectacular movie. I thought DRAGONHEART was quite a bit better than your average kids' movie too, back in the day. It's after that - from DAYLIGHT onwards - that I think Rob lost his way. And STEALTH was all kinds of eye-candy CGi-drenched shittles.
Robert Crais + $= :) by stvnhthr	Oct 30th, 2008 07:48:28 AM
JK Rowling said she would never do Harry Potter toys, movies, video games, or other tie ins. Then Warner Bros. unleashed their money men. I think after the disappointing Hostage movie Crais might have a bad taste in his mouth for Hollywood, but I bet for the right amount of money and creative control we could get Elvis and Pike to the screen.
I just threw up in my mouth a little. by fiester	Oct 30th, 2008 08:33:59 AM
Seriously.
XXX is still infinitely better than your average Bond film by gruntybear	Oct 30th, 2008 10:58:57 AM
Yeah, I said it. James Bond is cinematic Sominex.
maybe vin can make this work... by vaudeville villain	Oct 30th, 2008 11:58:01 AM
by incorporating a classic quote/command a la arnold. "get to 'da yamaha atv!!!" that would put him back on the action star map, right? ... right?
xXx/The Fast and the Furious/Boiler Room by p0llk4t	Oct 30th, 2008 01:59:41 PM
Can we get a crossover movie? Now that's money!
Ahh America's Bond. bless America. by Damien Chowder	Oct 30th, 2008 02:08:36 PM

Can't wait... by Smerph	Oct 30th, 2008 02:17:28 PM
...for a good film to be realised rather than this piece of shit. Xxx was a fucking abomination.
XXX was never about the movie by geraldbeans	Oct 30th, 2008 02:56:25 PM
someone up there said it best. it was a bunch of guys saying, "hey, what would 13 year old kids like?" And everyone threw in an idea (video games, youtube videos, motorcycles) and a movie was created around that. People are smarter than you think. Even 13 year olds. And they know when you're desperately trying to court them.
BRING BACK ASIA!!! by Logan_1973	Oct 30th, 2008 06:59:08 PM
You know ya'll want it...
bravogolfhotel by stvnhthr	Oct 31st, 2008 05:30:18 AM
bravogolfhotel it took me a couple days to think it over, but I think I would cast Aaron Eckhart as Elvis Cole if I could.
I have very mixed thoughts on the first by The Amazing G	Nov 10th, 2008 07:37:55 AM
on one hand it's cheesy enough that I can't COMPLETELY hate it, but the actions pretty much suck so....
whoops I meant "action sequences" by The Amazing G	Nov 10th, 2008 07:38:45 AM
and geraldbeans, youtube wasn't around when the first XXX came out
Who cares when AVATAR is fucking our eyeballs in 2009? by Motoko Kusanagi	Nov 18th, 2008 02:17:34 AM
nobody

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