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A more positive, yet far more damning, review of INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL comes in...

I hope it's the "Real Love" of Indiana Jones movies... by tonagan	May 8th, 2008 03:02:24 PM
That was the better "Threetles" song, I thought.
Will severely underperform; sad but true by Laserhead	May 8th, 2008 03:02:48 PM

Is John Williams score butchered by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:04:56 PM
like it was in the prequel films? Does it sound like another Lucas/Burt cut and paste job?
That's the sword of Damocles coming down on us gentlemen by IndustryKiller!	May 8th, 2008 03:05:31 PM
SO start the denial machine. I can't wait to see how you people justify this.
THIS GOES WRONG WHEN HE SAYS... by moto	May 8th, 2008 03:05:43 PM
... that he read Shogun's review first. I admit, I was ready to write a positive review of the film and claim that I had seen it at the same "screening" as Shogun did... just to prove a point that AICN will post almost ANYTHING. I didn't, but apparently someone had the same idea. OKAY, WHO WAS IT!? Come on... you know you're dying to admit it... it'd be AWESOME.
Raiders=Ticket to Ride by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:06:33 PM
Temple of Doom=I am the Eggman....Last Crusade=Polythane Pam
Indiana Jones is not quite the phenomena that SW was by Laserhead	May 8th, 2008 03:06:39 PM
and it doesn't matter... people simply aren't going to come out for this in droves. A borderline-respectable opening weekend, followed by a 70% drop. Just going on the record with my prediction.
HARRY, QUINT, MERRICK... by moto	May 8th, 2008 03:07:40 PM
... how about, instead of posting reviews that are unconfirmed, you use your contacts and call Lucasfilm, Paramount marketing, etc. and get a confirmation on this alleged screening that took place? Get an official word... even if it is a full denial.
yup. by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:08:32 PM
a) of course Lucas over explained the crystal scull idea. he tried to explain The Force to a planet full of Star Wars fans. b) Ford is older than Connery was when Connery played Ford's dad. There is a reason he didn't see and spin-off Indy's Dad movies. c) i'm sure there is a C here somewhere, but i don't really expect great things from this movie.
I seriously think everyone is over hyping this movie..... by ampersand110	May 8th, 2008 03:09:02 PM
just go in with low expectations, thats what i do now. Ever since last year when both spidey 3 and pirates 3 both did that to me. I thought those movies would be great and i went in with high expectations. DON'T BUY INTO THE HYPE PEOPLE OR YOUR MOVIE WILL SUCK. Unless it's just a shitty movie that is...
gotham_night by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:10:44 PM
are you saying the new Indy movie will be just as great as the prequels? wowza. i think it will suck, but i wan't going to bring out that big a diss.
George Lucas, STOP MAKING MOVIES! by beetlegeuse	May 8th, 2008 03:11:34 PM
At least stop fucking up the mythology of the old ones. No more Star Wars, no more Indy. You are not talented, you got lucky. Prove me wrong, make something original and awesome, otherwise please retire, enjoy your money, and STOP MAKING MOVIES!
I'm not surprised by how talky it might be by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:11:35 PM
Did anyone see the prequels. Each film was about 1 hr. 45 mins of people talking about what they were going to do, and about 25 actual minutes of anything happening. Kind of like a Kevin Smith film, but with even worse dialogue.
Let'ss top talking about box office right now by IndustryKiller!	May 8th, 2008 03:11:36 PM
Because as fans that shouldn't mean a god damn thing to us, and it doesn't say anything at all about the quality of the film. Whot eh fuck cares how much money a corporation makes off this film? It's going to make its money back in spades and then some, that's just inevitable. It doesn't mean the film is good and if it doesn't meet financial expectations it doesn't mean the film is bad. All that matters to us is the content. Priorities people.
wasn't by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:11:37 PM
is what that should have read.
When critiqued... by Embeedeuce	May 8th, 2008 03:11:59 PM
You want to be loved or hated. The worse fate is to receive ambivalence. I'm not a hater. I'm just afraid this movie is going to be totally... nothing.
and also, gotham_night... by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:13:30 PM
and perhaps why this site is only running bad reviews for the movie is because the movie rally does suck.
Iron Man was overhyped by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:13:35 PM
and I liked it, so I don't buy this "Oh my expectations were too high crap." You either like it or you don't, your expectations got nothing to do with it. If everyone tells me Jingle all the Way is a bad movie, I'm not going to watch it and like it because my expectations were too low. If it's good it's good. If it sucks it sucks. End of story.
Will this be better than Hollywood Homicide by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:14:31 PM
That's the real question.
the beard rules by Alec.Eiffel	May 8th, 2008 03:14:51 PM
Spielberg very rarely lets me down. He must have had some kind of quality control in place. I'm going to retain high hopes for this.
Just as disappointing, but much better review. by beastie	May 8th, 2008 03:14:54 PM
This guy seems to be a bit more objective. That said, it doesn't seem as if his negative points are going to bring the movie down for me. I am not expecting a masterpiece. I think that Indy flicks have gotten slightly worse with each installment. So, I'm expecting this to be slightly worse than Last Crusade, but fun nonetheless. I know that it won't be Raiders and I have come to terms with that. I just hope for fun.
spell check? by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:16:04 PM
you know what i meant.
So you can either... by knowthyself	May 8th, 2008 03:16:36 PM
...reinvent the wheel like Phantom Menace and get shit on OR stay the same like Indy 4 and get shit on. Great.
Alec.Eiffel: the beard sometimes smells of wank by badboymason	May 8th, 2008 03:16:51 PM
Indy 4 is Spielberg's spiritual successor to Jurassic Park:The Lost World, another unnecessary rehash.
There is no such thing as a 2nd 1st time. by YakMalla	May 8th, 2008 03:17:02 PM
IJATKOTCS may be a great movie or a shitty one, but no matter what, it's not gonna give you that same cherry high you got the first time you saw Raiders. It can't. Don't hate it for not delivering something impossible.
That's what I thought.... by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 03:17:08 PM
Now we have 2 reviews that say basically the same thing. Apparently the movie doesn't totally suck but is really weak. Honestly, it's what we all expected.
Speil and Lucas are OLD MEN now - please take their by joeelliott	May 8th, 2008 03:17:26 PM
cameras away. They've lost what they once had 3 prequels and one Dreamworks ago.
Okay, better written review, but did he see this...? by HarryBlackPotter	May 8th, 2008 03:17:41 PM
Seriously, if there were no screenings for Indy 4 and these 2 review are fakes, then AICN will be so very, very fucked. Which might not be a bad thing.
Another fake review......written my Merrick, Harry, or Quint... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:19:13 PM
......now they are trying to justify the first one so we don't continue to go ape-shit. I dont believe this shit. This whole site has an agenda to bring down Indy IV for whatever reason.
Samuel Fulmer by YakMalla	May 8th, 2008 03:19:31 PM
No offense, but boy are you dead wrong. Expectations are EVERYTHING!
IndyIV better make me Fill My Jeans With Frankenberries! by finky089	May 8th, 2008 03:19:59 PM
But, I'd be okay if it was just count choculas, too.
Anything but fuckin Boo-Berries by finky089	May 8th, 2008 03:20:17 PM

I love movie reviewers who tell us what they wanted to see by Coughlins Laws	May 8th, 2008 03:20:21 PM
in explaining that something isn't good. How do you know everyone else will think the skull mythology is anymore boring than what they had to say about the ark or the holy grail. Also, why does this movie work 15 years ago but doesn't work now? Sounds like your problem, not their's...
The kids don't care about this one by ZoeFan	May 8th, 2008 03:20:21 PM
And if the movie winds up being as mediocre as these reviews, this could be a financial disaster.
DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 03:20:27 PM
Paranoia will destroy ya.
badboymason by Alec.Eiffel	May 8th, 2008 03:20:52 PM
the Lost World was by no means great, but at least it was fun to watch, and I'd bet that was his intention going into it. It's Citizen Kane next to JP3.
...sigh... by Rando Calrisian	May 8th, 2008 03:21:00 PM

Keep In Mind... by Mako	May 8th, 2008 03:21:07 PM
These reviews were written by people who were in their diapers when RAIDERS came out. They are disgruntled because they want to be in the directors chair and currently are a part of catering or janitorial. If KOTCS feels exactly like the other 3 films... then mission accomplished.
Atleast this guy sounds honest. by bigbaldpapa	May 8th, 2008 03:21:26 PM
Bad reviews happen. Atleast this one wasn't dripping with hate like the turd in the other review.
DICKBLOOD by finky089	May 8th, 2008 03:21:32 PM
I think it's high time you sent Merrick or Mori YOUR OWN REVIEW as long as they're posting this shit. I'd lay money on the fact that while you're wouldn't be any more 'truthful" than the ones we've gotten so far, yours would easily be the MOST ENTERTAINING.
Bull by Sithdan	May 8th, 2008 03:22:26 PM
I don't believe ANY review is legit until the Cannes premiere.
Either AICN wrote this themselves or some TB'er did.... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:22:53 PM
...after seeing how many of us bitched and complained about Merrick's first bullshit review, and just wanted to fuck with everyone. I could write a review myself right now and send it to Harry based on the information I now know......bullshit. Its all around bullshit.
And what's that about a Belloq toy? by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 03:23:07 PM
He was the French archaeologist in Raiders right?
Samuel Fulmer II by YakMalla	May 8th, 2008 03:23:08 PM
If you think a movie will suck and it doesn't quite, you'll think it's great (e.g.: Jerry McGuire). If you have sky-high expectations for a movie that is so-so, you'll say it raped your childhood (e.g.: Phantom Menace). See, Jerry McGuire and TPM were both about as good as the other - actually kinda meh - but everybody loved JMcG and everybody hated TPM b/c of their relative expectations.
How high the expectation meter goes by UnknownUser	May 8th, 2008 03:23:20 PM
When the previous films have secured a legacy that very few ever see. I mean your going to slam set pieces for being too big! Have you seen the other films? It's supposed to be a sojurn into fantastic locals, and they should be big fucking huge unbelievable places that instantly spark your inner imagination into overdrive. I honestly believe that most people are out to kick this film in the balls before it was in production. Is it all winks to the Indiana past, or do the characters come in get re-established and centralized into an evolving plot that doesn't feel pushed in. Maybe this seems daunting for hardcore fans who know the entire Indiana legacy- front to back, but for newcomers you have to re install these characters. You have to cover a little backstory- so the new fans learn who they are. Then you push the plot forward. This one looks like someone comes to Indiana for help and somehow the others are also involved. I really don't think this film is as bad as you guys are making it out to be. So many people just get off on hating Lucas and now even Spielberg. Seriously the film so far looks fine to me. I'm not expecting Raiders or better, just one last Adventure.
Ya know what's sad? by BackwardGalaxy	May 8th, 2008 03:23:50 PM
You know what's most sad? I have to watch this movie. Every single review that comes out, from AICN posters to professional, could be completely negative and hate on it... but I have to see it anyway. And it sounds like this movie could suck. I don't want it to suck. I don't want it to suck. Please don't suck.
I'M WORKING ON MY REVIEW FOR INDY.... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:24:10 PM
It will be the best one yet. I'm really gonna go into the chemistry between Shia and Harrison once Indy realizes he is Mutt's father.
He absorbs more punishment than in the previous 3 movies combine by TheMcflyFarm	May 8th, 2008 03:24:12 PM
GOOD! If you have a problem with that because of his age, then you have a problem I do not share. You knew his age coming into it, and clearly belong in the camp of people who never thought the movie should be made long before they started shooting.
finky089... by ZoeFan	May 8th, 2008 03:24:35 PM
I second that!
Last Crusade and Return of the Jedi by tapehead1	May 8th, 2008 03:25:30 PM
Whether these reviews are true or not it seems clear to me that if you were someone who liked The Last Crusade and Return of the Jedi you will prolly like this one too. If those installments were too light and fun then you prolly wont like this. Personally, May 22nd at the Ziegfeld in NYC cant come faster...
yeah, but by mrbong	May 8th, 2008 03:25:38 PM
he will still do that "whip swing" shit over some sort of gap or crevice, right? you don't go and see The Stones or McCartney for something new they've done, you go for their classics. that's all the makers of this are doing, try seeing it in that context.
I dunno.... by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 03:26:14 PM
he took a lot of punishment in the past ...
Alec.Eiffel by codymr	May 8th, 2008 03:26:31 PM
I have to agree with you... SS almost always gives a us a strong show... even with his weaker outings. Spielberg rarely brings an unwatchable film to the screen. This review sounds more balanced and I think this guy has some prospective on the material. ShogunMaster's review seemed dodgy on details and some of his arguments were tepid at best.
Why Couldn't Lucas Have Broken a Leg at the Derby? by Read and Shut Up	May 8th, 2008 03:27:22 PM
...then he could've been humanely destroyed. George - STOP. You milk your cash cows 'till they're as dry as beef jerky. What happened to all that "once I finish the new trilogy I'll shoot some small, art house movie" stuff? Unless, of course, you consider the Clone War BS "small" and "art house." Seriously - how much money does one guy need to buy a real chin?
why would AICN want this to tank? by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:27:25 PM
they are all giant nerds who love this stuff. the idea that this site has launched an anti-Indy propaganda campaign is absurd. is it that hard to believe this won't be good? based on the last several "artistic endeavors" of these guys, why would fans even want this movie to be made?
YakMalla by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:27:34 PM
Wait a minute...you think Jerry McGuire is about as good as The Phantom Menace? No two ways of lookin' at it, you love the cock.
Highly skeptical... by busterkurosawa	May 8th, 2008 03:28:17 PM
... of these "reviews." The Indiana Jones movies all feature stand-out action set pieces. The truck chase, the mine car ride, the tank scene, etc. These are the scenes that Spielberg excels at and that always stand out, even if the rest of the movie is so-so. No mention of any such scenes in the reviews. Which tells me they didn't see the film.
This is seriously awesome.. by Jonah Echo	May 8th, 2008 03:28:32 PM
Someone read the last talkback and literally combined sentences from one of the reviews from IMDB and Shogunmaster's review. Again, they say so little. Is someone out to systematically destroy AICN's credibility?
ooops... by codymr	May 8th, 2008 03:28:38 PM
That should read "perspective" not "prospective." Damn auto spell check!
AICN doesnt want it to tank, and that is impossible..... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:30:07 PM
...no matter what Indy will make butt-loads of money. They just wanna bust everyones balls and get the TB's all electric and crazy like for the hype and traffic of the site. Its better for them that way. Harry doesn't want it to tank. But Merrick does. Lucas fingered his mom in the 80's or something....he has something against The Bearded One.
it'sjustamovieit'sjustamovieit's justamovie by AllieJamison	May 8th, 2008 03:30:07 PM
Argh. Oh God. Reading this is making me sad. The whole age thing was one of my major concerns before Shia/Mutt showed up. I always hoped they would make it part of the story and not obligatory insert it via some dialogue snippets. I always thought that the age-thing was what could legitimate the film's existence. Argh. Damn you Koepp. Yet again. THis is just one more opinion. I remember one year ago I was thinking I would skip reviews for this all together until the second time that I would have seen the film myself..because it's going to be one of the more personal experiences at the movies. The first time I see an Indy-film at the theater. The time I will revisit the franchise that initiated my love of film in the first place. What I find a bit strange about those comments/"reviews" is the complete absence of how intense it was to see Indy back on the screen accompanied by Williams' score. Maybe that's just a side effect of the "unnecessary"-quality the film bears.
TheMcflyfarm by IndustryKiller!	May 8th, 2008 03:30:19 PM
I don't think he's saying a lot of action is bad, I think he's saying that it's an example of this film reaching, disingenuously, to resurrect old feelings by just going "bigger! faster! more more more" which I think years of Hollywood sequels prove is a terrible policy.
What about the duck scenes... by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 03:30:23 PM
that may or may not make it into the water?
busterkurosawa by codymr	May 8th, 2008 03:30:45 PM
VERY good point.
now, the LEGO games and toys... by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 8th, 2008 03:30:53 PM
are a whole different story. those are great.
Do it, DannyDickBlood, Do it!! by finky089	May 8th, 2008 03:31:09 PM
At least post it here so we can all enjoy it. be sure to include your thoughts on the Crystal fisting scene between Blanchett and Indy when she "tries to make him talk."
Expectations are EVERYTHING by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:31:34 PM
So then why watch anything, because nothing is ever going to be as good or as bad as you think it is. This is the problem with many morons that watch movies, they spend more time studying trailers than the actual films the trailers were made from. Maybe our society has gotten so intellectually retarded that every movie should be a trailer, or possibly just a review from some nameless person on the internet. Then we will discuss how our expectations of how the trailer would be, or how the review would be written have either let us down, or raised us up.
Last Crusade will probably look like... by poeticwarriorII	May 8th, 2008 03:31:38 PM
The Godfather next to this insipid shit. One more nail in the coffin. The summer that could've been is now a has been. Fuck Lucas and Spielberg. What a couple of cunts. Someone please let them know VHS died 10 years ago and there's something out there now called Blu-Ray would you?
DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD by YakMalla	May 8th, 2008 03:32:47 PM
That's what I'm sayin', dude. It only sounds like heresy b/c it's real hard to be objective about Star Wars.
AllieJamison by finky089	May 8th, 2008 03:33:28 PM
DOn't bother reading the reviews. Real or not, they won't help our anticipation for the movie. Instead, I recommend we stick to ONLY reading the Talkbacks for these reviews. At least we know THEY'LL be entertaining.
Ok? That was a review? by sleeptones	May 8th, 2008 03:33:33 PM
i just read rambling about Rocky and one liners.. nothin about the movie, just opinions upon opinions about really nothing
How can a crystal skull be made of solid gold? by FILMFUNK	May 8th, 2008 03:34:56 PM
i think i must not spoil this any more for myself!
Mistake in Review? by Mission Code Z	May 8th, 2008 03:34:57 PM
"Ironically, the problem is that Lucas, Spielberg, and Ford are trying far too hard to give everyone what they think that they want. Look! It’s the Ark! Look! It’s Marion! Look! It’s not the mileage, it’s the years!" The "mileage" line has been confirmed by Spielberg as NOT being in KOTCS. He even made a point of it in the EW interview. Hmmmmmm.....
OK. AllieJamison, said something that made sense. by beastie	May 8th, 2008 03:35:33 PM
Being Indiana Jones and something that we grew up with, it's a very personal experience. I am, now, exiting the TB and reading no more reviews. If I see the words, "Indiana, Jones, Kingdom, Crystal or Skull" in a headline, I will do my best to not even read the rest of the headline. I hope that all reviews written on this site and others, both negative and positive are fake. Goodbye Indy hype, I will see you when Lucas announces the animated TV series.
And what's that about a Belloq toy? by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 03:35:40 PM
He was the French archaeologist in Raiders right? Did anyone catch that or know what I'm talking about?
There are really POSITIVE reviews elsewhere...why the bad here? by HarryBlackPotter	May 8th, 2008 03:36:37 PM
Why is AICN only printing the shitty ones? Take a look at other sites and they have far more positive reviews. AICN is obviously a site for haters.
Samuel Fulmer, again by YakMalla	May 8th, 2008 03:37:33 PM
I agree with you. We're all waaaay too into what the trailer looks like, or what some yahoo says in a review 3 weeks out. It's totally setting us up to love or hate before we go in.
If there were real people who have seen this movie....... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:38:22 PM
......wouldn't they be dropping a shitload of serious spoilers going into major details and lines spoken in order to wave it in the rest of our faces? Seriously. Nobody would get a chance to see Indy IV before the rest of the world and write this vague shit. Thats like if someone saw Episode I weeks before the rest of the world and wrote: Its a little disapointing, the character Jar-Jar has a lot of screen time and a lot of jokes that aren't very funny. There's a really good fight at the end between two jedi's and a character with black and red make-up. All in all its not as good as the original trilogy, but its okay.
or when he annouces the Abner Ravenwood prequels by beastie	May 8th, 2008 03:38:35 PM
or the Mutt Williams sequels. You have to read my previous post to get this one.
I hope you guys don't mind... by Hawaiian Organ Donor	May 8th, 2008 03:38:37 PM
But I'm going to sit this one out. I've got nothing left in the tank to discuss Lucas or Robocop or the President anymore.
Michael Bay raped my childhood... by DrEdwardMorbius	May 8th, 2008 03:39:44 PM
...and George Lucas supplied him with the roofies...
Not Reading Anything About This Film: Day 715 by Hikaru Ichijo	May 8th, 2008 03:39:46 PM
Seriously, Lucas will defy your expectations, as always, especially if you think you're somehow sophisticated now. As with most movies, you already know if you'll like it or not.
I posted a link to a very positive review on the other TB... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 03:39:50 PM
...for Indy.
Looks like it's Suck time then folks! by alucardvsdracula	May 8th, 2008 03:40:01 PM
Oh well, so it's gonna blow after all, sigh, but come on you lot be strong we've been here before when a certain Menace brought our collective hopes and dreams shattering around us. Also lets just look at the shit Lucas has thrown at us in the past anyway. Caravan of Courage, Droids Cartoon, Battle for Endor, Captin Eo, Howard the Duck, Willow, Radioland Murders, The Phantom Menace, Greedo shooting first! Sure there were redemptive qualities in some of EP2 and most of EP3 but on the whole this beardy cunt has shat what remaining talent he had out a long time ago, in a galaxy not fucking far enough away. Sob. Where's the razor blades?
Do the math people.... by Quake II	May 8th, 2008 03:40:27 PM
Raiders was a masterpiece, Temple Of Doom was decent and Last Crusade was almost a spoof of the previous films. Like a comedy version. Last Crusade had some cool moments but it never took itself seriously. I expect Crystal Skull to be the worst of the series. Why wouldn't it be?
Decade+ wait for a sequel? BAD idea. by Samuel Vimes	May 8th, 2008 03:42:03 PM
Sounds like that IJatKotCS will join GODFATHER 3 and THE PHANTOM MENACE as ill-conceived attempts to return to the cinematic well... From GODFATHER II ('74) to GODFATHER III ('90), RETURN OF THE JEDI ('83) to EPISODE 1 ('99), and now from LAST CRUSADE ('89) to CRYSTAL SKULL ('08)---there's just something bound to go wrong when you go back to make a sequel all those many years later... At least Coppola and Lucas "only" waited 16 years to return to their reputation-making properties--- Spielberg (AND Lucas) have nearly TWO DECADES worth of waiting before bringing back Indy. I suppose it's just Spielberg's turn to suffer the critical backlash that his pals Francis and George went through with THOSE attempts of revisiting the cinematic successes of their youth?
So many of you sound so hysterical and desperate by Laserhead	May 8th, 2008 03:43:08 PM
to defend a movie you haven't seen from two people who HAVE seen it. There was a screening. This is not news.
YakMalla by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:44:22 PM
I agree, and maybe this is also where you're coming from, but my issues isn't with the films (good or bad), but with this pre-release media blitz conditioning that a lot of people buy into. When it comes down to it, it's got to be about the actual films, not all the other crap that comes with it. I do understand thought that's a hard thing for many people to do.
Herb West...Raiders toys by Quake II	May 8th, 2008 03:47:51 PM
are all over the place. Go to Wal Mart or Target. They released Crystal Skull stuff as welll as a ton of Raiders toys. 12" Indy, Cairo Swordsman, 12" Nazi Officer, 3 3/4 Belloque, German motorcyclist, Cairo Nazi truck set etc...LOTS of Raiders toys now on shelves.
a bad indy movie is still a great adventure movie by zom-bot.com	May 8th, 2008 03:48:05 PM
so what if it doesn't live up to snuff? you can't top the freshness and perfection of raiders. i expect a good movie for the summer, and it still sounds like that. i have no money or soul invested in the indy franchise.
:-( by Ashok0	May 8th, 2008 03:49:07 PM
:-(
I don't know, this sounds reasonable by bravogolfhotel	May 8th, 2008 03:51:58 PM
Proper spelling and grammar and an evenhanded tone make it more plausible than the first review. There's a lack of new details that aren't already floating around, but it can't be immediately dismissed.
I MAY SEE THIS AT THE DRIVE IN by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 03:52:07 PM
Cause I hate people and their bullshit. I don't want to sit next to a dribblin' tard with butter covered fingers going "uuhhhhh" sniff "uuhhhhhh" Yea it's happened.
No love for Curtis Armstrong? by gridbug	May 8th, 2008 03:52:25 PM
What the fuck is a royal frush?!
AND NO IT WASN'T A FAMILY MEMBER by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 03:52:57 PM
hafgdfad
Time for Willow 2 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:52:58 PM
With Shia La Beef as Madmartigan Jr.
AMERICAN GRAFFITI PREQUAL by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 03:54:28 PM
Right Now. And follow that up with an Amercan Graffiti CGI Animated Movied that bridges the gap between the two.
I don't understand the movie geek community anymore by Agent Johnson	May 8th, 2008 03:54:45 PM
I remember when we were all excited about ANY Indiana Jones movie. Now, what I seem to read all over the place is "Did we expect it to be any good?" I do. This movie is fairly critic proof to me. I trust Spielberg, Lucas, and Ford to give me an entertainiing addition to the Indy franchise. And the idea that critics on AICN have that this is more of the same and not enough new: Isn't it a sequel? Isn't it SUPPOSED to feel like an Indy movie with more of the same?
Expectations have no bearing on the quality of a movie by The Funketeer	May 8th, 2008 03:55:17 PM
It's not the filmmaker's fault that you've built something up in your head. A movie stands on its own I can't wait to see this and I'm not expecting it to be like the first three movies. I'm not even hoping it will be like the first three movies. Everyone is older and it takes place in a different time period. Why would we expect it to be Raiders part 2?
Away with Alien Skull. Bring me Atlantis. by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 03:55:38 PM
Bring me NUR-AB-SAL. Bring me Dr. Ubermann. Now that's Indy 4. Seriously, the trailer disappointed me a lot. They say something about the Amazon Forest then show Foz do Iguaçu. Damn! At least Petra is near the area of the Crusades. Also, I don't get people seeing Temple of Doom was better than Last Crusade. How's that? I really wanted to love ToD, but I watched the whole trilogy over the weekend as a preparation for the movie and the 2nd movie really struck me as the worst in the series. Unless you watch it as a parody/comedy. Anyway, I'm still going to see this movie (maybe at theater), but I'm waiting for at least some redeeming reviews. From what I saw in the trailers, Indy looks tired, Marion is way too happy and Shia I just want him killed off. Bring me more reviews!!
AMERICAN GRAFFITI PREQUAL by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 03:55:56 PM
Yea, and have Shia Lashit as a 50's greaser named "Mutt". Do it George Lucas do it !!! Right in the asshole...oh yea...right there...Oh yea...here's my action figure money to daddy!
Hook 2 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:57:35 PM
Still Hookin'
George Lucas wouldn't know a good script by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOODS_DUI	May 8th, 2008 03:57:45 PM
if one sucked his shrimpy cock. Someone stop this jackass from strip-mining his own half-assed creative past.
All the bad buzz is making me wonder if... by Norman Bates	May 8th, 2008 03:57:57 PM
they accidentally shot the M. Night script. All kidding aside, the last trailer was boring!! The theater I was in didn't even seem to care. They liked The Incredible Hulk trailer more, and that was terrible too. Of course the trailer is no way to judge a movie, but damn, I should be wetting my pants at the very thought of this movie, now I feel like shitting in them. ^what?
really, what do detractors want? by zom-bot.com	May 8th, 2008 03:58:09 PM
i keep hearing people's complaints being that it's more of the same, or reliant on the others,or it just doesn't 'feel' right, or something is missing but nobody has said WHAT is lacking- just that something is. No one is knocking any absurdities of the story, so i assume it's still an interesting adventure....so what is it you folks want? IT WILL NEVER BE THE FAN FICTION YOU HAVE BUILT UP IN YOUR HEAD. and if it was there would be no surprises. and you'd be pissed that they read your mind.
GIVE ME THX 1159 by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 03:58:37 PM
Then Lucas, You can give me THX 1155, 1156, 1157.
Always 2 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:58:59 PM
Still boring, still Dreyfus.
Laserhead by Agent Johnson	May 8th, 2008 03:59:04 PM
The internet seems to have spawned this type of person that hails or reviles a movie based on marketing. People love "Dark Knight" already and no one has seen even a screening, as far as I know. But people are saying how GREAT Heath Ledger is. Shouldn't we see the movie first before hating or loving? I admit I am EXCITED for Indy, but I'll reserve judgment till it is actually released.
FILMFUNK - you're mistaken by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 03:59:05 PM
the skull isn't made of gold, it's the city in which it was kept. Listen to the narration again. I didn't see no "gold" city in the trailer, but I know he wasn't actually talking about the skull.
these filmmakers have too much at their disposal by LarryTheCableGuy	May 8th, 2008 03:59:34 PM
these days. they need to go back to he crafting of a film where your cleverness and craftiness comes into play. then they won't write the stories to be so soulless, fantastical and unbeleivable.
LUCAS NEEDS TO MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT.. by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 03:59:42 PM
He needs to do a documentary on his neck fat.
Amistad 2 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 03:59:51 PM
The Fog
One Crazy Summer 2: Cassandra becomes GI JANE? by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:00:06 PM
And goes lezzy for Hoops' new crush, Anne Ramsey.
1942:2000 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 04:00:55 PM
With Dan Ackroyd, and John Goodman.
ANOTHER Another Stakeout by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:01:10 PM
this time Rosie O'Doofus just whines about not actually having any STEAK to eat
gotham_night by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:01:44 PM
Wouldn't that be the greatest?!! I'd beat off so hard my dick would fall off and I'd end up loosing it.
The Color Purple 2 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 04:01:49 PM
Danny Glover's back and he's pissed!
Empire of the Sun 2 by Samuel Fulmer	May 8th, 2008 04:02:43 PM
Also known as another excuse for Christian Bale to drop 100 lbs again
Neckroll: A story about Lucas' neck fat by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:02:51 PM
starring Kathy Bates as the "neckroll" and Merrick as the guy who wants to rub his dick in it.
Should have made stand alone Shia movie first. by Diagnostic	May 8th, 2008 04:02:57 PM
Then the world could have seen how truly great the character is. Shame.
Howard the Duck 2 by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:03:20 PM

by UnknownUser	May 8th, 2008 04:03:45 PM
Why do we support a review system that's perverted itself into a dictorial agenda against creatives is beyond my understanding. I understand the critic, but I hate how the newer ones feel a need too police those who work in the industry now. A filmmakers is 1 part of the process of film making. You can't place the failure of that film solely on his/her shoulders, nor can you place the success of that film upon them. But thats exactly what we do today. We seem to have as much interest in the film maker as we do the films they make. So many more hands are involved, but this site loves to come down on the directors 9 times out of 10. They don't review bad films anymore, they make personal vendettas against filmmakers and actors and studios. If they were slighted or previously offended personally by that person. That persons career is forever in their bad judgement. You ever hear the saying "Eat the food, ignore the Cook" We let the reviewers get to close. It made their heads swell, seeing the process, they grew envious. They thought that getting hands on gave them insight. A person who paints vs a person who watches a person who paints. Two thumbs up was a great system. If it was a total bomb it got two thumbs down. If it was something you could live with seeing, it was one thumb up one thumb down. I don't need a review with more words in it. Then the sentences spoken in the film. I don't need to know my critics superior pallet or what qualifies his judgements on the film. I don't care how many times this reviewer previously watched another film that the new film is based on or sequeling off of. At the end of the day all that matters to me is how I felt when I watched the movie. and if I didn't like it I say so but I don't police on the guys who were involved. I hate how bad films are now grounds for war against the filmmakers future in the business. I say all Greats fail, and it's ok, you can't hit every pitched ball. But as a spectator- If you see a strong, well timed swing and it misses, respect it... It's when those at bat don't try, and they let the ball come in expecting an easy walk, that you should get pissy. I know they tried with this film. I know they tried so fucking hard to make it the best they could, and anyone who want's to tear it down. Is an asshole. Plain and simple.
Three Times Upon A Time by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:03:49 PM

spies like us 2: by zom-bot.com	May 8th, 2008 04:03:55 PM
spies like spies like us
gotham_knight by Agent Johnson	May 8th, 2008 04:03:59 PM
I'm almost with you, dude. I want to like "Dark Knight" and I hope it's good. But on here it is the second coming. Meanwhile, those same defenders of Dark Knight can't WAIT to shit on Indy. Man, this site has changed. I remember when a new Indy movie would have been the ONLY conversation on here.
Hudson Hawk 2: Still better than this GI Joe movie by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:04:26 PM
fuckin bullshit pics and stuff
The best part of the trailer by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:04:50 PM
is when Indy shoots a rocket from a rocket launcher into some crazy Devastator tank in the jungle.
Labyrinth 2: Where's Waldo by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:05:37 PM

Oh well, I will wait for the DVD. by MontyPigeon	May 8th, 2008 04:05:55 PM
From that review it sounds as if it's completely mediocre. Had some hope that it would be one of the best of the summer but at this rate, it doesn't look good. Shame really.
Fletch 3: Kevin Smith Lost by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:05:57 PM

Duel 2 by jackalcack	May 8th, 2008 04:06:17 PM
Actually, I'd watch that
"I'm gettin to old for this shit." by Shepard Wong	May 8th, 2008 04:06:39 PM
I hear that and I'm walking the fuck out. That said, o review, no matter how bad, will keep me from seeing this opening night.
Dark Crystal 2: Gelfling Porn by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:06:41 PM

Beverly Hills Cop VIIIIIII by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:06:43 PM

launches I mean by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:07:14 PM

BMX 2: Rad Razor Scooters! by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:07:37 PM

PCU 2: Not Another College Movie escapes from White Castle by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:08:17 PM

Jurassic Park: The Begining by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:08:18 PM

official word re: moto by Quint	May 8th, 2008 04:08:23 PM
I can ask the publicity guys at Paramount, but that's not necessary. We have long time spies that are indeed in a position to know that have confirmed the film screened the night these reviews are claiming. No, we don't have a George Lucas certified review, so, as always with early word, take these reviews with a grain of salt. We tend to believe them, which is why we've posted them. If they smelled off to us or we didn't know the film was finally screening we wouldn't have run them. There have been reviews earlier that we never ran precisely because we couldn't get confirmation on screenings and the reviews smelled fishy. The movie is screening now. There have been studio screenings, distributor screenings and 10 days from now it'll play Cannes and screen to critics all over the country. From here on out, we're probably going to see a lot of word about the flick.
Idustrial Light and Magic 2 by Norman Bates	May 8th, 2008 04:08:29 PM
Old people do cool stuff too.
NOrth Shore Part 2: I'm Rad! by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:08:52 PM

Big Man On Campus 2: OOGA MALOOGA! Kathy ! Kathy! by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:09:10 PM
1 Malooga, 4 Loogas
Cocoon 3: Old Fuckers Never Say Die by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:09:44 PM

Rad 2: Isn't this Rad by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:10:07 PM

Big diff between the Prequels and Indy 4.... by EagleDelta1	May 8th, 2008 04:10:15 PM
Indy 4 has been in the works since the early 90s - it just took this long for Ford, Speildberg and Lucas to agree on a story - the prequels pretty much came outta nowhere. Also, Lucas came up w/ the story, but he did NOT wirte the script or direct - he delegated that role to other players - another difference from the prequels. Finally, you can't always take what a reviewer says at face value - most of Lucas' movies(even the good ones) have always been bashed by reviewers - even the original SW and TESB, but they were pretty good movies
Indiana Jones and Who The Fuck Cares by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:10:59 PM
get off my lawn, you kids!
Starfighter 2: The Trailer Park Wars by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:11:44 PM

Down with Shia! by fiester	May 8th, 2008 04:11:50 PM
Can't you see, Hollywood, no one wants this simpering little snot in movies outside of a few studio execs--people go to the movies despite him, not because of him! Arrrgh. Someday soon he will vanish Corey Haim style and the long nightmare will be over.
Prequels deserved their bashings by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:12:07 PM
And I quote: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooo!
Starfighter 3: Back to The Future by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:12:57 PM

Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Lucas Cut by Norman Bates	May 8th, 2008 04:13:15 PM
More kid friendly then ever! Indy's whip has now been replaced with a CGI fairy feather.
Teen Wolf 3: Harem Scarem by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:13:48 PM

I can't wait to see .... by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 04:13:55 PM
little Suburb Shia in action. (snicker)
Would the "Fake review!" screamers like salt with that crow? by IndustryKiller!	May 8th, 2008 04:14:09 PM
Seriously get a fucking grip. These are real reviews.
3 Amigos 2 : lil amigo by LarryTheCableGuy	May 8th, 2008 04:14:59 PM

The Reluctant Astronaut Meets Darth Vader by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:15:14 PM

People who make box office predictions suck cock by choice by Guy Who Got A Headache And Accidentally Saves The World	May 8th, 2008 04:15:38 PM
What is with that anyway? Who gives a shithow much money a movie makes, and double who gives a shit what your arm chair analyst basement dwelling prediction is? I can't stand it when a real dude whose job it is to do that opens his mouth to spew that shit at me, like it means jack shit.
Is anyone surprised? Does anyone care? by ScottinDC	May 8th, 2008 04:15:46 PM
I sure as hell don't...of all the sequels this summer (and blockbusters), this one excites me the least. I loved the first Raiders...I even dug the Temple of Doom. I was amused by Last Crusade until they reached the 'ancient knight' at which point, I wanted to kill myself...it was the equivalent of watching Spielberg and Lucas rape Indy to death then canibalize his corpse looking for spare change. So, when I saw the trailer for the Crystal Skull, I wasn't intrigued - I was bored. It looks silly and not in a Saturday serial sort of way. It's not a throwback; and the movie is truly unnecessary. That's the best word for it.
by AllieJamison	May 8th, 2008 04:16:10 PM
Right on, Finky. I don't remember the "movie geek community" being all excited about IndyIV, Agent Johnson. What I remember is that IndyIV has mostly been talked and thought about with a lot of (very legitimate)caution among film geeks until that first photo of Harrison Ford sitting on that chair hit the web (first occasion of collective jerk-off). I've got the feeling, though, that after some more use of sexual metaphors caution grew bigger again.
Alien Skulls by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:16:35 PM
Why did it have to be alien skulls? It seems archeology couldn't offer any interesting plot. It's back to being a boring science. Indyana Jones now in ......... SPACE!!!
yea i agree who the fuck cares by awesomeo3000	May 8th, 2008 04:16:38 PM
if ur a fan of indy ur gonna see it im excited about this film so im def gonna see it regardless of wat this guy or anyone else says
Nice review, Languatron’s Bane by jobytack	May 8th, 2008 04:17:07 PM
Just thought I'd mention that I thought it was fairly well-written and structured...
Labyrinth 3: David Bowie Returns by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:17:22 PM

Indiana Malooga by spud mcspud	May 8th, 2008 04:17:26 PM
It not the years, it the loogas. One malooga, four loogas ;D
GOONIES: THE LATER YEARS by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:18:09 PM

Need I remind People that by EagleDelta1	May 8th, 2008 04:18:27 PM
Lucas already TOLD everyone in interviews that this one wasn't going to be what everyone expected/wanted - it was a movie that he, Speildberg and ford WANTED to do - the ideas for how they wanted to do it and the themes for the movie have been around in their minds for a decade - even if they are using a different story now. Anyway, point is - you were told, you should expect it.
Thank Kali... by IronSkillet	May 8th, 2008 04:18:42 PM
...they didn't make Chris Columbus's script. Wow.
And if the big secret ending is ... by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 04:18:55 PM
Indy getting into a spaceship, I swear I'll puke.
"Mileage" line is not in the movie by MattmanReturns	May 8th, 2008 04:18:57 PM
Confirmed by Harrison Ford, as another talkbacker pointed out. Why is AICN ignoring that fact?
JACK BURTON AND THE KINGDOM OF THE ARK CRUSADE by spud mcspud	May 8th, 2008 04:18:58 PM
BELLOQ: Mister Burton. Again we see that there is nothing you can possess that I cannot take away. And you thought I'd given up. You could warn them. If only you spoke Hovitos! JACK: Son of a bitch must pay!
Indiana not Indyana by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:19:14 PM

Don't jump on Lucas yet... by solobear	May 8th, 2008 04:19:19 PM
C'mon, people. We have two early reviews pop up, and now everyone's ready to damn George Lucas' soul to hell once again. Why not give this film a chance. Wait to make a decision until you've seen it for yourselves. I learned a long time ago not to let "critics" make up my mind for me about what films I should or shouldn't see. It's interesting to hear what they have to say, but it has never been a factor in my movie-watching habits. I'm more interested in looking at what they say AFTER I've seen a film to see if their opinions come close to mine.
Battle Beyond The Stars 4 by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:19:24 PM

Escaper From L.A.: Again by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:20:49 PM

That's "Escape" not Escaper by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:21:20 PM

Lucas by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:21:47 PM
is over
Parallels between 2006 and 2008 by Norman Bates	May 8th, 2008 04:22:33 PM
Superman Returns == Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of For Fucks Sake Already.
Artists critiquing by UnknownUser	May 8th, 2008 04:23:08 PM
other Artists and or aspiring Artists in Public Art Forums. Where you have to judge others works while you also submit your own. There's a structure of respect that feels so good and kind. If you see something wrong with someone else work, you don't tear down, and speak ill of that person the work or their abilities. You make respectful suggestions that aim to improve that persons abilities. I like that system, because it breeds a better community. That honestly respects each other, and lessons are learned. People aren't punished for failures. They learn from them, and everything improves. Call me a silly fuck, but I wish the film reviewing business could steer itself somehow into this area of critiquing.
I can handle negative reviews. No problem. by mrfan	May 8th, 2008 04:23:26 PM
What I don't like is how vague they are. Throw us something new that you didn't care for in this movie. Be a little specific. So far those reviews have had stuff in them that can be found easily on the internet.
What was the last film by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:23:44 PM
in which both the trailers and reviews were bad and the film still fucking rocked?
Damn George Lucas' soul to hell.... by Herb West	May 8th, 2008 04:23:48 PM
Yeah, and his little bitch Suburb Shia too. Sounds good to me.
I liked RockyBalboa, but that approach would be completely WRONG by togmeister	May 8th, 2008 04:23:57 PM
....i don't want to see Indiana Jones moping around like a has-been sadsack ruminating on how he's screwed up his life. I want to seem him talking smack as before('Always glad to help', 'C'mon genius..'), i want to see Harrison Ford taking the hits and being put through the mill on a physical level. I want ugly critters, cliff edges,lost cities, jungles and booby traps. THIS is what we want from Indiana Jones, NOT a nostalgia ride. And by all accounts that's exactly what Spielberg and Lucas will deliver. They made a movie that's of a piece with the previous three and that's exactly how it should be. Remember the mistake of the Pirates of the Caribbean sequels? The first was rollicking fun. the Second and Third were dreary mythologising. They forgot the elements that made the first movie entertaining and tried to build a legend. Sounds like that's a trap that Indy 4 has avoided..
This Site Actually Has Changed... by TroutMaskReplicant	May 8th, 2008 04:24:26 PM
Go back and read old talkbacks from years ago. They're more optimistic. It looks to me as if people have become more embittered down through the years.
Thanks Quint! by moto	May 8th, 2008 04:25:34 PM
I guess we won't REALLY know until the movie debuts. But thanks for the response. Grain of salt it is. I guess the sad part is, this is proof that many TBers rely on someone ELSE'S review to dictate their own response or "back up" their preconceived viewpoints, be them good or bad. Personally, I'll decide for myself. I actually enjoyed the hell out of Last Crusade. It's no masterpiece, but it entertained. So despite the hate for Last Crusade, and despite any negative review that may come in, I'll decide for myself regarding this next installment.
The Influence Of Others... by solobear	May 8th, 2008 04:25:53 PM
Frankly, who gives a shit what anyone thinks about something like this before you've seen it yourself. If you rely on the opinions of others to make up your minds for you, then your nothing but a brain-dead chump. Think for yourself for a change, and let the rest of these pablum pukers see that their prior-to release opinions don't mean jack shit. I'll make up my mind for myself, thank you very much.
TroutMaskReplicant by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:27:04 PM
If you are looking for optimism go to Iron Man TBs
Quint by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:27:42 PM
What the fuck would lead you to believe either of these reviews are real? The first one sounded like it was written by a fucking 9 year old retard. But Merrick hand-picked that one to post so I suppose it makes sense. But seriously. You guys are just itching to post anything negative on Indy so you suck the first dick that flops out of the briefs.
Indiana Jones was never that great by The Biomind	May 8th, 2008 04:28:44 PM
RAIDERS is the only really good Indy flick.
It's an industrial light...that's magic! by Osmosis Jones	May 8th, 2008 04:28:52 PM
"Mola Ram, prepare to meet Kali...in HELL...!"
AllieJ - everything grows "bigger" when using sexual by finky089	May 8th, 2008 04:29:23 PM
metaphors. At least, that's the case here at AICN where we all posture, all day long.
TroutMaskReplicant by Underoos Hero	May 8th, 2008 04:29:33 PM
If you are looking for optimism ask Hollywood to make good movies.
the other imdb review .. by t40stunt	May 8th, 2008 04:30:09 PM
for the sake of not been biased liked this site usually does ( love of anything Apatow )heres another review i found on a different site ...shocker i know .I caught an advanced screening of the fourth Indiana Jones movie and I say I enjoyed it IMMENSELY!!! Wow, for years now I thought that after "War of The Worlds" Spielberg has lost his touch; not so here. Here he returns to the basic fundamentals of the lost arts of practicality and just plain good old fashioned genuine storytelling (something that's solely lacking in today's CGI-heavy world) helped along by the big guy himself Harrison Ford along with witty and charming Shia LaBeouf as a newcomer to the franchise with George Lucas lending some support to cinematography. Ford is simply amazing as the venerable adventurer with lots of impressive stunt work. Everything is bigger and better than before, the action is of high-caliber, the plot is thorough and exciting with intelligent writing coupled with awesome special effects. But what really surprised me was that it looked like it was filmed in the 1980's; something that's rare in this Digital Age!!! I'm sure those accustomed to digital film-making may be put off, but it actually works really well and gives the film an added dose of nostalgia and sense of wonder that Spielberg brought so successfully in his past films. Not many films can achieve that feat, but I can strongly say that Spielberg has gone out on top and brought back one the most beloved cinematic heroes around for one more time.
I wonder how many people... by Norman Bates	May 8th, 2008 04:30:24 PM
who are telling us not to judge this movie yet have talked shit about Shyamalan or Bay on these TBs? and prejudge their movies?
The Biomind by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:30:30 PM
I disagree, Crusade is great
Spielberg boasts that this movie looks and feels exactly like th by Evil Hobbit	May 8th, 2008 04:31:05 PM
That's all it needs to be. Indy needs to be a fast paced actioner. With more then 3 acts, with fast changing set pieces and objects of desire. Indy is all about a frenziedly changing adventure. I'll wont read any reviews from now on. The trailers didn't show us anything. I'll continue that trend and enter the cinemas open minded. Let it enroll on me and be surprised by a new Indy film.
I'm with DANNGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD on this one by slone13	May 8th, 2008 04:31:40 PM
I'm surprised Ain't It Cool is buying this shite. Or pretending to.
t40stunt by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:32:29 PM
"witty and charming Shia LaBeouf" whatinthenowthen?
indiana jones should go after the necronomicon by LarryTheCableGuy	May 8th, 2008 04:33:49 PM
that way you know youd have a dark indy whos really in danger of supernatural evil and the ones who would do anything to get their hands on it. that would make a good indy film.
About these supposed "reviews" by Termigoonie	May 8th, 2008 04:35:20 PM
Since when do Ain't It Cool readers suddenly get so squeamish about spoilers? Hm. How come there's nothing in these reviews that I can't glean from the trailers or from the books and merchandise that just came out on shelves? How come there's not one single description of a full scene, recitation of lines of dialogue, or very specific mention of what the reviewers don't like? It's all so ... vague. Is it possible they haven't seen the movie? Just maybe? Here's one for you: The new Indiana Jones movie SUCKS DICK. It's nothing at all like "Raiders." What were Steve and George THINKING? They begin the thing with an absolutely over-the-top, unnecessary and campy MUSICAL number that has nothing at all to do with the plot. Then, when the thing finally gets going (trying too hard to have that "at the end of the last movie" kind of serial feel), we realize Indy is saddled with two of the most inane "sidekicks" ever -- a horrifying, screeching, incredibly unfunny bimbo blonde who brings nothing to the movie like Marion did, and a pidgin-English speaking 10-year-old kid, an obvious attempt to appeal to the kid audience. C'mon, George, we know you SAY you make movies for 10-year-olds, but do you have to PROVE it? And why's Indy going after the three "Sankara stones" in this movie? Not to save them from falling into the hands of the Nazis and thereby saving the rest of humanity ... but because some village got its children kidnapped and he wants to get the kids back. Man, that's about the weakest motivation I can imagine. Then there's about 20 minutes of endless dialogue explaining what the stones are. Who gives a #^$*&? Just get to the action. Yeah, when it comes it's OK, but man it takes forever to get there and there's no sense of pacing at all -- just one set piece after another, none of which really means anything. And that kid and that screaming Willie Scott are always nearby. It's painful. Now ... I happen to LOVE "Temple of Doom." But today's Internet haters would have torn it to shreds before it even opened. Of course, it always helps to actually SEE the movie first. I am dubious that these "reviewers" actually did. You may think George and Steven have dropped a few ticks in your book, but I think Harry and Aint It Cool have dropped in mine, desperate to prove that Indy is disappointing ... even if it means running some of the most unlikely "reviews" I've ever seen on the site.
Pessimism by solobear	May 8th, 2008 04:35:27 PM
It's truly sad that so many so-called "fans" feel obligated to tear something apart before they even see it. If we listened to these numbskulls, we'd never see anything. I enjoy movies both old and new. I don't feel the need to constantly compare these films to something I saw in the past. Do I think Lucas and Spielberg can make me feel about this film the way I did about RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK in 1981. No. But I do think that they've probably made a damn good film and I'm going to have a great time watching it. And by the way, how come so many of you know so much about George Lucas' cock, anyway. Hiding out in the bathrooms at Skywalker Ranch again, huh? Get a friggin' life. This crap you spew is frankly insulting and does nothing more than make those of us who do care and have a true love of cinema look bad.
Norman Bates by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:35:47 PM
Oh come on Bay deserves all the shit he gets that fucking cocksucker.
If it's as good as Crusade, I'm in.... by moto	May 8th, 2008 04:36:12 PM
People need to go back to Raiders and see how many light moments there really were. Last Crusade took the character to another level. The young Indy sequence was excellent, Phoenix nailed it. The action was superb. Ford was great. People complain about Marcus turning into an idiot... you're missing the point/joke. He was 100% out of his element and full proof that Professor Jones is like no other archaeologist out there. That is what Spielberg was shooting for. It was a great flick. If Crystal Skull matches that at least, I'm 100% sold.
I'm Not Worried by nickdoll	May 8th, 2008 04:38:33 PM
It's all about how you go into the theater. If you go in expecting Raiders (or even Doom or Crusade) you are going to be disappointed. If you go in thinking it's going to suck, it is going to suck. I'll be going into that theater on the 22nd at 12:01 am expecting a fun movie that reminds me of why I loved the old trilogy, but doesn't live up to it. It'll be fun to see Indy and Marion and their new friends on the big screen, and Spielberg and John Williams doing what they do best. Besides, even if this film only represents a shadow of the old films, it will still be better than the crap Hollywood squirts out now a days. Hell, it could be the best film of the Millennium if it contains half the charm of old school Indiana.
gotham_night by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:39:31 PM
I know you love Indy as much as me.
We live in a cynical world... by moto	May 8th, 2008 04:39:42 PM
... and talkbacks at AICN are proof of that.
LUCAS SABOTAGED THIS FLICK by alice 13	May 8th, 2008 04:41:30 PM
search your feelings... you know this to be true.
OPINIONS IN GENERAL by solobear	May 8th, 2008 04:41:54 PM
I was taught early on that everyone is entitled to an opinion, but what does it say of those who form their opinion without knowledge? Do all of you cinematic nay-sayers want everything that comes out to fail? It sure seems like it. If everyone listened to you, no one would see anything, this site would disappear, and you'd would have to find somewhere else to vomit your inane garbage.
Scorcese to release TAXI DRIVER II by wilsonfisk89	May 8th, 2008 04:42:32 PM

Review is a fake by supermansdead18	May 8th, 2008 04:43:15 PM
There was no screening by Paramount. Why would Speilberg, who has kept the movie under ironclad secrecy, all of a sudden want to preview a movie to a bunch of nobodies, risking negative reviews like the one written. It just doesn't make sense. The world premier is set for Cannes, four days before the world premier. It's obvious the two people whom reviewed the movie negatively wanted press. Every scene mentioned in their reviews are from the full trailer and the TV spots. Indiana needs no press or preview screening! Don't believe a single review until its world premier at Cannes!
you know,... i hadn't even expected that the... by mansep	May 8th, 2008 04:44:09 PM
...film would be bad. I optimistically and foolishly assumed it would be entertaining and exciting and enjoyable. I feel like i'm being pinched awake from a dream and only now beginning to see the nightmare. But i'm not upset about it.. just disappointed... there are other films to look forward to.
solobear by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:44:48 PM
Man I'm the only one on here all fucking day, defending this fucking franchise!!! I haven't gotten a God Damn thing done at work, I'm about to get fired-- all for my love for INDY FUCKING JONES!!!
Indiana Jones has screened 3 times by HEADGEEK	May 8th, 2008 04:44:54 PM
officially.
15 year old? by Termigoonie	May 8th, 2008 04:45:03 PM
I don't think it was a 15 year old who "hated" it -- those "reviews" were the work of some embittered 40 year old, more likely!
Teens today don't care for Indiana Jones (the character) by Prof. Pop-Cult	May 8th, 2008 04:46:00 PM
It surprises me that the latest chapter of this series probably won't do so well. But when you think about it, it's not too surprising. It's been 19 years since the last movie, and a whole generation of young people have been born and raised into adulthood. They can't relate to this (or Speed Racer), but they do dig the Marvel and DC superheroes.
HEADGEEK by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:46:37 PM
I still say if those reviews are real-- they would have given a helluva more detail to throw in our faces.
Headgeek by Termigoonie	May 8th, 2008 04:46:53 PM
Could you please name the times, locations and screening rooms/theaters so we have some evidence that what you're saying MIGHT be plausible?!
MOTO... by solobear	May 8th, 2008 04:47:24 PM
Boy, did you ever hit the nail on the head! But I refuse to be that way. How much effort does it take to keep an open mind about something? I can tell you from experience that it takes none at all. All you really have to do it ignore the negative crap that these people post over and over again. I find it all very irritating, but at the same time it is strangely amusing. Where do these people come up with this junk anyway. Frankly, if I enjoy this movie, that's all that's important to me in the long run. I don't give a shit whether anyone else likes it or notlikes this movie or not. I have a HUGE DVD collection, and sure I've got stuff in it that a lot of people don't like. But I like it and that's the bottom line.
NOT THE MILEAGE ITS THE YEARS IS NOT IN THE MOVIE by misnomer	May 8th, 2008 04:47:46 PM
Spielberg said so himself in an interview....he said it was the the theme of the film, but that the line wasnt in there. Someones lying.
Termigoonie by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:48:43 PM
News Flash: Temple of Doom sucks
Shia... by Dick Jones	May 8th, 2008 04:49:06 PM
...still sucks cock.
BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:49:28 PM
Hey Fanboys, here's an all important message for you: BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK BOYCOTT HANCOCK Fuck WIll Smith!
Can someone explain to me... by mrfan	May 8th, 2008 04:49:35 PM
how negative reviews never offer any real insight on why they are negative? The positive ones always have something to back themselves up. The last two reviews of Indy don't really go into detail about why it is bad. They skim the surface. Come on. If giving a negative or bad review then about telling why.
I expect... by Pariah74	May 8th, 2008 04:50:11 PM
...a complete popcorn movie. Just like the other three.
SHIA DOES SUCK COCK-- AND LET ME CLARIFY..... by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:50:14 PM
....in spending my entire day defending this franchise, I am in no way condoning the casting of Shia. I despise that little fucker almost as much as I despise income tax.
Duel 2 by Groothewarrior	May 8th, 2008 04:50:17 PM
Dennis Weaver still driving thru Arizona doesnt know his long lost son, Shia, is after him with a big old Mack truck
and so will by The Old New	May 8th, 2008 04:50:20 PM
Alien Skull
The review is legit by guidotkp96	May 8th, 2008 04:50:58 PM
As a film buyer in the midwest, there were film screenings all throughout the United States yesterday. I have seen the film, and the reviews are right on.
BLAME LUCAS by Harry Bolzonnia	May 8th, 2008 04:51:07 PM
EVERYONE LOVED DARABONTS SCRIPT BUT LUCAS REJECTED IT. HE HAS DESTROYED BOTH OF HIS FRANCHISES NOW....CAPITOL LETTERS RULL!!!
mrfan by finky089	May 8th, 2008 04:51:26 PM
the same reason they want you to boycot Hancock
Puddleglum by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:51:28 PM
I'll stand by your message.
guidotkp96 by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:52:10 PM
Write a detailed review....
INDIANA JONES WILL RULE ONCE AGAIN! by solobear	May 8th, 2008 04:52:11 PM
Negative reviews or not, sad fanboy tirades or not, Indiana Jones is coming back to theaters on May 22nd. THAT'S what's important. If you don't like that, then keep your fat ass at home at let the rest of us enjoy the kind of movie that makes being a true filmfan worthwhile. I swear to all the GOds, past and present, that if there is someone is sitting near me in the theater before this film starts and they start saying how much this movie is going to suck, I'm going the pepper the floor with their fucking teeth!!!
guidotkp96 by finky089	May 8th, 2008 04:52:56 PM
can you give us some kind of detail about it that would "prove" you've seen it? Not something reiterated on the Internet.
solobear by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:52:57 PM
Thats the attitude.
WHEN AND WHERE DID IT SCREEN? by slone13	May 8th, 2008 04:53:11 PM
I'd love to know. I work for Viacom, owner of good ol' Paramount Pictures. Something fishy's going on here...
There is no way... by Dr Fantasy	May 8th, 2008 04:53:22 PM
That this movie can meet everyone's expectations. The "Indy" name has become so iconic, it's as if everyone has already produced and cut the "perfect" movie in their heads. I myself have always been an enormous fan of all three movies. The other day I watched "Temple of Doom" again and discovered something interesting. Had that movie been released today, I think it would receive the same type of scrutiny "Kingdom" is receiving. It is FAR from a perfect movie. It has the same cheesy one liners, two dimensional characters and outrageous set pieces, but we still embrace it. Stop over analyzing. Just sit back , relax and allow yourself to be entertained.
guidotkp96 - for instance by finky089	May 8th, 2008 04:53:27 PM
can you tell us what the Paramount mountain logo fades into in the opening of the movie?
Good points solobear... by Rando Calrisian	May 8th, 2008 04:54:58 PM
I feel the same way. I've been kind of disheartened by this whole talkback (and the previous one). Yet I can't turn away...
DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD by Puddleglum	May 8th, 2008 04:55:10 PM
I drink your dickblood. I DRINK IT UP! But not like those cockpeddlers who slurp up EVERYTHING about HAN-FUCKING-COCKUPTHEIRASSES! They and that movie just piss me off.
Rando Calrisian by DANNYGLOVERS_DICKBLOOD	May 8th, 2008 04:55:42 PM
Stay positive Rando!! STAY POSITIVE!
Raiders by Termigoonie	May 8th, 2008 04:55:55 PM
Anyone actually WATCHED it lately -- the haters, I mean? The thing has dialogue coming out of its ears, is paced like a leaden snail compared with a "modern" (Avid-cut) action movie, and spends more time focused on the nuances of the Ark and the implications of finding it than imaginable. It's a "boring" movie by today's standards. And one hell of a great adventure!
Termigoonie by codymr	May 8th, 2008 04:56:06 PM
Great talkback... I chuckled all the way through your post. I tip may hat to you sir.
guidotkp96 - drop some answers on us already by finky089	May 8th, 2008 04:56:36 PM
if you are who you say you are. I'll be back in a while to see if you have "proved" yourself.
The credibility of past reviews by Jonah Echo	May 8th, 2008 04:57:54 PM
Though there is clarification on there now, obviously, this thing was up for days back in 2001 before corrected. http://aintitcool.com/node/916 7
Temple of Doom Was Vastly Underrated by Harry Bolzonnia	May 8th, 2008 04:57:56 PM
Much better than Crusade. Nice and dark. The only thing that sucked was kate capshaw.
It's days like these when I hate the Internet... by sapno_krei	May 8th, 2008 04:58:21 PM
I saw Indy III completely spoiler and review-free in 1989, and loved the heck out of that movie. Judging by you guys' opinions of that movie today, I think that if AICN had existed back then, I'm certain my spirits about the movie would have been crushed three weeks in advance. Damn you Interwebs!
I WAS RIGHT! I WAS RIGHT! by Merriman Lyon	May 8th, 2008 04:58:27 PM
Well, well, after crying out till I was blue in the face that this movie would suck - I am finally proven right. Now, I never say, "I told you so" and I don't like people who do, but......... I TOLD YOU SO!
I have seen this movie. Didn't like it. by mrfan	May 8th, 2008 04:58:45 PM
You see it started with this. And ended like this. Then all of the sudden this happens. Too bad. Because this is what I was expecting. Otherwise, maybe, this would do the trick. You see from my review I mean business.
i love the complaints by j2talk	May 8th, 2008 04:59:02 PM
i love it when i read the reviews that say "what they should have done was...... " Its Lucas and Spielbergs playground people.....If you dont like what they have done TOO BAD....it might not be what YOU wanted it to be but its their creation and they get to do what they want with it....watch the movie or dont but remeber there ideal was to make an old time saturday matinee serial style film.....its supposed to be a little cartoonish
finky089 by

Talkbacks

A more positive, yet far more damning, review of INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL comes in...