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Hell, Thy Name Be SPACE CHIMPS!!

First by Series7	Apr 7th, 2008 10:41:57 AM
Andy samdumb
CHIMP'S GOTTA EAT by Se7en	Apr 7th, 2008 10:43:14 AM
YEZ THEY DO
I see by Series7	Apr 7th, 2008 10:44:15 AM
They already have the video game lined up for this.
Can this be worse then by Series7	Apr 7th, 2008 10:50:17 AM
Fly Me to the Moon? Seriously, how is it now that when it comes to computer animated movies they like always come in two? Starting with Antz and A Bugs Life, The Wild and Madagasgar. Finding Nemo and A sharks tale. Happyfeet and Surfs Up. Like these all can just be coincidence.
Finally. by YakMalla	Apr 7th, 2008 10:52:50 AM
Bergman was supposed to do this back in 1965, but opted for "Persona" instead.
AND WHAT THE CHIMP PULLED FROM HIS ASS.... by Greigy Just Wanted To Say	Apr 7th, 2008 10:57:50 AM
Is still a million times better than anything McG is gonna come up with.
Wash that image from your brain... by Kentucky Colonel	Apr 7th, 2008 10:58:03 AM
Go download the tune "Space Monkey" by John Prine. That will help ease the pain. Much props to Laika...the Soviet Space dog who was the first Earther to be blast into space. Sadly she did not come back alive. There's a great story (I forget the name, but it's listed on Wikipedia) about an alien race that saves her from her fate. Way to go Aliens!
this by freydis	Apr 7th, 2008 11:02:23 AM
is one of the best headlines ever
Never work with animals, children or Michael Bay by photoboy	Apr 7th, 2008 11:04:11 AM
This film doesn't have any Michael Bay so it's not totally irredeemable.
The 21st century's Baby Geniuses.... by Pennsy	Apr 7th, 2008 11:05:36 AM
I'd rather watch the My Bloody Valentine 3D reboot.
NOT EVEN GIANT ROBOTS WHO LOOK LIKE KRISTEN BELL by Pennsy	Apr 7th, 2008 11:06:27 AM
Could save this one. Razzie finalist, yes?
From... by tomdolan04	Apr 7th, 2008 11:07:18 AM
"One of the primates who brought you Shrek" And everything becomes clear. Pop culture references, unfunny gags dragged out beaten to death resuscitated then murdered again and franchised to infinity and beyond as well as characters that have no charm or depth.
Worst film site ever by God's Brother	Apr 7th, 2008 11:08:35 AM
or my computer is a helluva lot slower than it was 2 minutes ago. Anyboy else not even get to the trailer? Jesus... don't I have anything better to do?
It's be funny if this was re-edited to Michael Jacksons 'Beat It by ingloriousjedi	Apr 7th, 2008 11:09:14 AM
..or if Eddy Murphy did a voice over of what the monkey was thinking. Or both.
No Comment by Underoos Hero	Apr 7th, 2008 11:15:31 AM

I Liked The Original Title Better by Mike-El	Apr 7th, 2008 11:18:01 AM
"CGI Kiddie Movie"
Wow I didn't laugh once. by kungfuhustler84	Apr 7th, 2008 11:19:58 AM
Not at a single thing on this entire page. Ugh. That movie looks absolutely atrocious and that clip was stupid and unneccessary. Hearing all those people laugh like total morons at the stupid chimp wasn't helping either. How embarassing.
I have only four words : by TheCap	Apr 7th, 2008 11:23:53 AM
Lancelot Link : Secret Chimp. That is all.
Ah, For fuck sakes. by TJ Donkey Show	Apr 7th, 2008 11:29:25 AM
Jack In The Box, any one?
Wanted this to be good. by beastie	Apr 7th, 2008 11:52:50 AM
Too bad it doesn't look that way. Anyway, I rented Surf's Up this weekend with my son and was shocked at how good that was.
closest Hardee's has been... by they call it the dip	Apr 7th, 2008 11:54:03 AM
... to the movies since Marge Gunderson has breakfast there in Fargo.
Amtrak is sponsoring that site? by Shut the Fuck up Donny	Apr 7th, 2008 12:02:59 PM
Makes sense since Amtrak is always involved with TRAIN WRECKS!
Nothing remotely amusing or creative... by Sledge Hammer	Apr 7th, 2008 12:05:43 PM
...so basically it's like a film version of Merrick then?
Patrick Warburton is a cartoon whore by Shut the Fuck up Donny	Apr 7th, 2008 12:07:10 PM
but he's still Brock "Fuckin'" Samson, so he still gets my love.
Slightly better than Buffy. by ZeroCorpse	Apr 7th, 2008 12:15:18 PM
But that's not hard to do. The clip above is about on par with Whedon's writing. Space Chimps does still seem to suck, though.
I used to work for Amtrak and you're so right! by Uncapie	Apr 7th, 2008 12:21:32 PM
Great job! Bartender on the Southwest Chief! We had a tight crew, but management are a bunch of fucking civil servant losers that don't know shit on how to run a business. That's why Amtrak needs bailing out every year by your tax dollars. The union is shit and they need to get rid of the slackers to make a profit. Some asshole put an upright refrigerator on the tracks out of Albuerque and we slammed into it around the bend doing sixty. Everyone was out there, Alby PD, Feds, Amtrak PD. We were waiting for the Chicken Delight man next. Scary shit though. They change engineers every six hours and your six on twelve off, then you go back for six, yet you don't know when that six will be so it fucks with your sleep pattern. We hit either a person or a deer out of Scottsdale, AZ, and we had to stop the train to see if we could find the body. Being the Number 4 guy in charge guess who had to help look for it? I saw the blood and some of the meat, but we never found the body. Creepy shit, to say the least. Amtrak needs to spend money on getting their shit together instead of advertising space chimp movies. Maybe their looking for new employees. That's be about right. And if you can avoid it; don't take the Coast Starlight or Sunset Limited. Starlight is always 12 hours late, Sunset is always a day late.
They finally use CGI Chimps by JoeSixPack	Apr 7th, 2008 12:27:10 PM
I am so sick of studios using live chimps unnecessarily.
Uncapie, I sense the job was less than satisfactory by Shut the Fuck up Donny	Apr 7th, 2008 12:27:27 PM
I was having a conversation with my wife on why we haven't modernized the rail system like the Japanese (considering the state of the airlines), and then you went along and answered me! Also, I have to ask what your job description looked like if they had you pouring drinks and searching for mutilated carcasses.
LASER CATS! by AdrianVeidt	Apr 7th, 2008 12:28:09 PM
Seriously.
"AND WHAT THE CHIMP PULLED FROM HIS ASS....Is still a million ti by Aethyrr	Apr 7th, 2008 12:29:58 PM
Hahaha totally agreed!
monkey movies are still bankable to studios? by Datascream	Apr 7th, 2008 12:41:41 PM
well...they let Eww Boll direct movies still...I guess it makes sense.
Couldn't even get it to load. Fuck Flash movies by jimmy_009	Apr 7th, 2008 12:45:03 PM
When will idiot studios and web designers learn? Just put the thing on Quicktime (not flash embedded) so people can actually watch it. I tried for ten minutes to load this crap and never did. YOU'RE ALL IDIOTS for choosing realplayer, flash, or any other crappy delivery method other than quicktime.
Damn Dirty Apes!! by ezdz	Apr 7th, 2008 12:48:18 PM

Vanguard Animation is the bottom of the barrell by erikharrison	Apr 7th, 2008 12:56:42 PM
I'm sure some bright, talented people work there, but their animation quality is poorer than Dreamworks, and their story weaker than Blue Sky animation. If Pixar is Disney, and Dreamworks and Blue Sky are Don Bluth and Ralph Bakshi, then Vangaurd is the team who make "ALADDIN AND HIS MAGICAL LAMP" right before Disney makes "Aladdin".
"Hail to the Chimp" by LitCrit621	Apr 7th, 2008 01:07:05 PM
may be a better title
Get your stinking camera off me.. by nolan bautista	Apr 7th, 2008 01:07:24 PM
..you damn video taping humans!!
BATTLE FOR THE CONCORDE AIRPORT 79 APES by uss cygnus	Apr 7th, 2008 02:01:13 PM
Now with 50% more Charro!
What's wrong with you people? by Sailor Rip	Apr 7th, 2008 02:01:51 PM
People on this site go batshit crazy over some dud called Wall-E and here we have a movie called Space Chimps, probably the greatest title I've ever heard, and all you can do is bash it.
Must be awful by Pariah74	Apr 7th, 2008 02:03:00 PM
if AICN didn't think it was great. Wait, what does Harry think?
PIGS.....IN.....SPAAAAAAAAACE!!! by BetaRayBill07	Apr 7th, 2008 02:04:04 PM
You knew it was coming.
SPCHIMPNO ! SPCHIMPNO ! by Se7en	Apr 7th, 2008 02:05:11 PM
they rape my childhood ! Bwuaaaaaaaa !!!! SPACE CHIMP IN NAME ONLY !!! DAMN YOU MICHAEL BAY !!!!
SPACE CHIMPS II: THE SEARCH FOR GODZOOKY by uss cygnus	Apr 7th, 2008 02:09:56 PM
"Ham! I Saw It!"
Nice to meet Hillary's speech writer by thegreatwhatzit	Apr 7th, 2008 02:24:34 PM

Didn't Bobby Brown do that for Whitney Houston? by James Westfall	Apr 7th, 2008 02:42:08 PM
And that monkey has bigger schnutz than all of the guys laughin' at him combined. He could kill a man with his sac.
Where's the by Embeedeuce	Apr 7th, 2008 02:43:14 PM
monolith?
SORRY THIS TRAILER IS TEMPORARILY UNAVAILABLE by jesuschrist	Apr 7th, 2008 03:01:32 PM

"Get ready for fun! Hang on!" by Jackie Boy	Apr 7th, 2008 03:11:49 PM
"Ha ha, the Indian guy's singing an old song I never heard before in his funny accent, get it? Now quick, buy me a Happy meal, McDonald's has the Space Chimps toys!"
On a related note... by Jackie Boy	Apr 7th, 2008 03:12:49 PM
I went to the site, and "Chimped myself." I feel unclean.
-whacks Merrick in the head with a baseball bat- by Anna Valerious	Apr 7th, 2008 03:20:04 PM

LOOKS LIKE THE MONOLITH CAME OUT OF THE CHIMP'S ASS by BurgerTime	Apr 7th, 2008 03:58:32 PM
A leaner for sure.
Hang On! More Fun to Come! by Rex Carsalot	Apr 7th, 2008 04:22:03 PM
No combination of words had given me the chills in quite the same way. Death to the monkey site.
Sequel in the works by Kankennon	Apr 7th, 2008 04:31:18 PM
Meet the Spartans II: Electric Space Chimpaloo
And........this website has hit a new low. by otm shank	Apr 7th, 2008 04:51:12 PM
Homer Simpson got his wish. Commander in Chimp, Hail to the Chimp, Editor in Chimp, and now Space Chimps. Also, the youtube video reminds me too much of an ex-boss. Frightening.
Is the Chimp In The Video Here... by Batman Begins Sucks Ass	Apr 7th, 2008 05:35:37 PM
...shitting out The Dark Knight or is that a behind the scenes look at where Nolan got the script?
Trailer Wouldn't Play For Me... by buster00	Apr 7th, 2008 05:39:46 PM
...but the "Hammertime" bullshit at the site's intro didn't exactly inspire me. How is it possible to fuck up a movie called SPACE CHIMPS? This thing should have written itself!
That Monkey Just Ate McG!!! by Frodo T. Baggins	Apr 7th, 2008 06:31:36 PM
I was wondering where hes been lately. Oh well. Hell taste better the next round.
You can see the Trailer here by jesuschrist	Apr 7th, 2008 06:40:17 PM
http://www.trailerspy.com/movi e-trailers/view/517/space-chim ps-trailer/
Yeah, Captain Simian was decent by ballyhoo	Apr 7th, 2008 07:09:33 PM
Just weird stuff, but fun.
I WANT THESE MUTHAFUCKIN' CHIMPS OFF THIS.... by uss cygnus	Apr 7th, 2008 07:16:55 PM
MUTHAFUCKIN' ROCKET RIGHT...FUCKING...NOW!!
Hmmm... bet it's better than Transformers by br1947	Apr 7th, 2008 07:22:29 PM
Yep, Captain Simian was the first thing I thought of too.
W by Puddleglum	Apr 7th, 2008 07:57:02 PM

T by Puddleglum	Apr 7th, 2008 07:57:12 PM

F by Puddleglum	Apr 7th, 2008 07:57:22 PM

? by Puddleglum	Apr 7th, 2008 07:57:33 PM

Fuck you. It's some kid's movie. by WolfmanNards	Apr 7th, 2008 08:05:51 PM
Why not report on Snow Buddies and bitch about that?
Transformers better than Cloverfield? by br1947	Apr 7th, 2008 08:24:51 PM
Then thank God I skipped Cloverfield. Garfield the Movie was better than Transformers.
Don't knock it till you try it! by kirttrik	Apr 7th, 2008 08:41:40 PM

Chimps! In! Spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace! by Yeti	Apr 7th, 2008 08:48:53 PM
Well that was just lovely. No wonder the fundamentalists have such a problem with evolution.
DAMNED DIRTY APES!!! IN SPACE!!! by br1947	Apr 7th, 2008 08:56:01 PM
Goes nicely with the space whales from Star Trek IV.
I read this script back when by 23GreatWoundsAllGotInBattle	Apr 7th, 2008 09:07:41 PM
I worked at Sony and I passed on it then. What the fuck do I know, though?
Shut the Fuck Up Donny, that's funny! by Uncapie	Apr 7th, 2008 09:16:22 PM
The ranking system on the train is like this; 1.Conductor, 2.Engineer/Brakeman(You would think they'd be #1. They're at the helm.),3.Dining Car Manager, 4.LSA(Lounge Service Attendant...FUCKING BARTENDER IS WHAT IT IS!). Pay was good. Tips were great at Christmas. Amtrak is actually a private company that's subsidised by the government as they travel through the continental U.S. Each state has to kick in and so do the taxpayers to keep it running. Trains are 35 years old too, but those electric diesels are tough machines. We share the tracks with BNSF(They offered me a job as a conductor. Should have taken it.)so if they show up, we have to give them the right-of-way. That costs time. They were supposed to put in a L.A. to Vegas run bullet train. Built the tracks and everything, but the government pulled the plug on their financing because of the oil industry. That would have been a cash cow for everyone! Amtrak needs to be taken over by the government and that union needs to be given the boot. They had a guy at Chi Station that was stealing people's luggage and using the company card to stay in hotels when he wasn't working. He did this for a year! The guy got caught finally and all he got was 90 days probation and got his job back because he had tenure with the company. Then there was this supervisor that harrased a transexual employee and wanted to see her "vagina" operation! He was a shit. Napoleon complex.He was given the option to be fired or take early retirement. Everyone hated that guy so the tranny did everyone a favor. Yeah, take the palne or drive. Fuck Amtrak and Space Chimps too!
Chimps? Space? How could this possibly go wrong? by Harry Weinstein	Apr 7th, 2008 09:53:04 PM
Oh, I see. Wow, did they ever squander a good title on some absolute bullshit here or what?
I can't even believe I'm saying this... by Jinxo	Apr 7th, 2008 10:04:22 PM
... but, truthfully, if you're going to make a movie about monkeys in space, the only way to have even the remotest chance of it being entertaining is to use REAL monkeys. I mean, that could still suck too but you gotta take the shot at the Lancelot Link styling. Again, that could still suck hard but you at least have a shot. Digitally animated chimp cartoon? No shot at all. And that ape has a Carl's Juniors in his ass. "Don't bother me, I'm eating."
i wish my balls were that big, i would put them on Michael Bay's by Ironhelix	Apr 7th, 2008 10:26:30 PM

forehead. by Ironhelix	Apr 7th, 2008 10:26:48 PM

reverse?? by karl_pilkingtons_head	Apr 7th, 2008 10:37:45 PM
push the LEFT button
You cut up his BRAIN, you bloody BABOONS...! by Osmosis Jones	Apr 7th, 2008 10:46:16 PM
Monkeys are NEVER, EVER funny.
Fuck Monkeys. what about Jews in Space! by AshesOfDonnie	Apr 8th, 2008 01:06:57 AM
that movie is looong overdue. "We're jews, jews in space. zooming along, protecting the hebrew race!"
My grandparents dog by smackfu	Apr 8th, 2008 01:32:40 AM
used to eat horseshit all the time. And you could tell he knew it was so wrong, it was his guilty pleasure, you'd see him slinking over to a pile of horse shit cautiously looking around to make sure no one was watching, then he's scarf down some buscuits. Who knows, maybe it's an acquired taste, like eggrolls or curry. The first time you eat it, you're like 'fuck, this is nasty' but then at 4am you're awake in bed thinking 'you know, I could go for that again right now'.
Jews In Space by smackfu	Apr 8th, 2008 01:38:01 AM
Again with the lightspeed? Always you have to go so fast? Where are you going in such a hurry? Where could you possibly have to be that you need to go the speed of light to get there? Leave a few minutes early, that's what I say.
Where's the story about Uwe Boll??? by the podosphere	Apr 8th, 2008 01:51:39 AM
He apparently has promised to quit making movies if one million people sign a petition. Story link: http://tinyurl.com/5mhgt7 Now here's a chance for the Boll haters to let their true feelings be known: http://tinyurl.com/3h28dl You know what to do.
smackfu, that cracked me up by NomoredirtyjokespleaseweareYanks	Apr 8th, 2008 02:40:14 AM
mwah haha haa
Hail to the Chimp! by bender7	Apr 8th, 2008 03:47:49 AM
monkey attacks man "That's what you get for not Hailing to the Chimp!"
Space Chimps 2 : Ape Boogaloo by pearlanddean	Apr 8th, 2008 06:04:39 AM
I got an Ape Drape yes I do....long live the Vandals!
such a wonderfull name for a picture by ironic_name	Apr 8th, 2008 07:01:25 AM
shame its looks so awful.
LOL smackfu by Steve_Dooku	Apr 8th, 2008 07:11:09 AM
Funniest shit I've read in a long time. Well done.
There Will Be Chimps by m_prevette	Apr 8th, 2008 07:17:22 AM
...hell I'd watch this twice before subjecting myself to the overwrought tripe of PT Anderson ever again. Carry on, Space Chimps, carry on.
AshesOfDonnie, already done, see Space Balls by br1947	Apr 8th, 2008 07:19:01 AM

Clyde from Every Which Way But Loose by Grammaton Cleric Binks	Apr 8th, 2008 07:44:18 AM
could kick these chimps' collective asses. Did you see what he did to that mobster's car? Clyde, scrap the caddy. Right turn Clyde.
Hail to the Chimp by jackofhearts29	Apr 8th, 2008 08:44:55 AM
"That's what you get for not hailing to the Chimp!"
This is the greatest AICN thread EVER by Drunken Rage	Apr 8th, 2008 09:57:46 AM
And Uncapie, that was an amazing post.
Uncapie you are totally reviving my interest in rail by Shut the Fuck up Donny	Apr 8th, 2008 11:41:34 AM
simply because I have a morbid fascination at this point to see what it would actually be like to ride Amtrak this day and age! Shame about the LA/Las Vegas bullet train, but I am not surprised about big oil haltering that experiment. Anyways, enough about trains. What started as a terrible pun has clearly brought back some Post-tramumatic stress for you!
I love Space Pimps! by BigTexas42	Apr 8th, 2008 12:29:53 PM
My favorite episodes are "Space Pimps vs. the Black Ho'" and "Space Pimps and the Special Mission to Uranus". what? "chimps"? not "pimps"? well shit! who the fuck wants to watch that?
br1947 prepapre for ludicrous speed by AshesOfDonnie	Apr 8th, 2008 02:23:06 PM
I always forget to count Spaceballs as Jews in Space. I mean Spaceballs had it all, a flying Winnebago, the scwartz, a coffee maker and a three ring circus. But the one thing that was missing was a flying Star of David spaceship. that is the coolest spaceship ever. Any movie that features a giant spacehip in the shape of a star of david is cool in my book, and I ain't even jewish. I know there are people out there who wished to have seen that in a feature length film! If we can get snakes on a plane, we can get jews in space! (hey even the Leprechaun made it to space, with hilarious results!)
MXP: Most Extreme Primate by Dr Lisa Cuddy	Apr 11th, 2008 05:17:00 PM
Check and mate

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