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Moriarty examines THE MUMMY

Yeah! I'm ALWAYS right! by Damien667	Apr 29th, 1999 12:04:50 PM
I've been telling people to go see this ever since I read about the first test screening some months back on this sight. But the only negative word I have ever heard has been the fact that this is a "typical summer crap fest" (and that comment came from the more intelligent and eloquently spoken crowd). Now I can equate it to the Indiana Jones franchise in a sense that people can understand and appreciate. I'm happy that my former employer has finally written and released something that they carefully tested and re-did until perfection (unlike, say, "Kull: The Conqueror"). Go see this film. Go see "Idle Hands". Have a fun summer and don't wait ever moment standing in line for Episode 1, because you know that someone had already bought your seat out and is willing to scalp it to you for $100 anyway. One last thing: I live here in L.A. and feel WAY out of the loop on advance screenings. If Moriarty, LaneMeyers or any of you other people trapped in entertainment hell will me could just send me a little info. on press screenings and the what-not, I'd appreciate it. (Try "mulder@mediaone.net-- usually works better.)
Badass by -Z-	Apr 29th, 1999 12:12:33 PM
If this movie is as good as he toots it up, this will probably be the best year for movies in a LONG time. Aside from a new Star Wars, Kubrick's swan song this year is shaping up well. Kudos to M. for his detailed and interesting review.
bladerunner? by bombay	Apr 29th, 1999 12:17:17 PM
Moriarty if you don't know why BLADERUNNER was a critical flop,i'll tell you,it's BORING!.It's so slow,weird and there's too much irrelevant talking.If there had been 2 flying car chases,one in the middle and one at the end,then it would have been a worldwide hit.The MUMMY is better than the 2 INDY sequels,cos they're both crap!.And since when is JURASSIC PARK good,it's one of the most dissappointing movies i've seen.Mind you,it's better than a 4 hour SCORSESE MOVIE,Full of nonstop voiceovers.BRING ON DEAD is gonna be crap.DINO is gonna be 6hours of voiceovers,the same applies to GANGS OF NEW YORK,talk about repeating yourself.SCORSESE must be forced to RETIRE!!!!!!.
Great non-spoiler review! by The Tree	Apr 29th, 1999 12:23:38 PM
Thanks, M, for not giving away the film with your review. It's seems that of late, the vast majority of "reviews" that I've seen are actually "book reports." "Here's my review: This happens in the film, then that happens in the film, and, surprise, at the end everybody dies!" That's not a fuckin' review. That's a "Cliff's Notes" cheat sheet. So thanks to Moriarty for painting an abstract representation of the film, conveying the tone, mood, and over-all quality of the movie, without painting a detailed portrait, enumerating characters, plot twists, and dialogue. Keep 'em coming, M!
1982 by The Spleen	Apr 29th, 1999 12:37:57 PM
The evil genius is soooo right about 1982, and especially about Blade Runner, The Thing and Poltergeist. I had so much fun that summer I'm still dizzy.
Thank you... by Rocqueja	Apr 29th, 1999 12:41:40 PM
...to M. for a great review and bombay for a 16 year olds perspective on movies!
Moriarty, when will you test screen END OF DAYS? by ABking	Apr 29th, 1999 12:48:05 PM
Moriarty, do you know when you are going to test screen END OF DAYS? And please, try not to rip that film apart until you've seen it. EOD could surprise you, just like THE MUMMY. Also, do you know if Universal will play the END OF DAYS teaser trailer over THE MUMMY next week Friday?
WHO WOULD WIN IN A FIGHT BETWEEN ROCKY AND THE MUMMY? MY GUESS.. by JaneDoe33	Apr 29th, 1999 12:58:40 PM
Oh-la-la!!! I saw the trailer for this big fat movie. When that Mummy is coming right at Brendan Frasier and he's shooting at it, and yet the Mummy doesn't stop walking....oh man, did that scare the kaka outta me! Look out Brendan! Look out for that damn Mummy! One thing that might detract from the film's integrity: throughout the second half of the movie the Mummy is wearing a "I Love Doritos" T-shirt. Come on! That's just blatant product placement! Doritos didn't even exist when the film takes place! Come on!
Smokin too much crack by stryker	Apr 29th, 1999 01:31:16 PM
PLEASE tell me that you did not compare any of the Indiana Jones movies with The Mummy. That statement alone should get you fired. A bunch of cheesy digital effects does not make a movie. You have the fucking balls to mention Brendan Frasier in the same sentence with Harrison Ford? After tellling people to see IDLE HANDS and now talking out of your ass about a movie with an actor that resembles a cardboard cutout, I'm starting to think you guys are losing your touch. Please stop smoking crack or whatever has altered your train of thought.
JaneDoe33 by big deal	Apr 29th, 1999 02:22:31 PM
JaneDoe33 cracks me up EVERY TIME! Hey, are you my friend Ryan, JaneDoe? Ryan is REALLY FUNNY too. Go Mummy!
IT'S MUMMY-RIFFIC!!! HI, MY NAME IS...WHAT? MY NAME IS..HUH? MY by JaneDoe33	Apr 29th, 1999 02:38:36 PM
This is in response to the post above. No, I am not Ryan. I'm much sexier than Ryan is. Plus, I love pro wrestling. My favorite character was The Iron Shiek but he has long since retired.
DAMN IT! by paragonian	Apr 29th, 1999 03:17:39 PM
The Thing is the greatest horror film ever made. It's the only movie that I have ever seen that has scared me and it still continues to scare me, and I've seen em all. The only ones that come close are The Shining, The Exorcist and Hellraiser 2. I was only two years old when it came out so how could the moronic public and critics not support it.DAMN YOU ALL! I was anticipating The Mummy until I heard that Stephen ( Deep Rising )Somers is writing and directing, he strikes me as an audience pandering hack, at least Spielberg and Lucas are good at it. The only films which interest me this summer are Eyes Wide Shut,The Haunting (maybe), and The Fight Club. Oh ya, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre was pretty damn scary too, especially that part where that geeky guys looking around and without any warning that meat locker door slides open and What's its name smacks him on the head with a hammer and slams the door closed again. What ever happened to surprises at the movies, besides the "I'm surprised people are stupid enough to make this and think it's actually worth making" surprise.
i need to praise moriarty like i should by tommy five-tone	Apr 29th, 1999 03:24:27 PM
when i see that the evil genius is reviewing something, well, i revert to a ten year old high on red food additives and pixie stix. the man KNOWS that some movies are made for serious exploration and that some are made to just be slurped down like a margarita. as a devotee of the summer of 1982 (a lasting happy memory is seeing a double bill of 'the thing' and 'prophecy' with a gang of like-minded thrillseekers), i say moriarty for president!
IT'S MUMMY-TASTIC!!! by JaneDoe33	Apr 29th, 1999 03:54:11 PM
OK,OK...let's all calm down. We all have our differences, whether it be film, pro wrestling, Tom Cruise, etc. I think we can ease the discourse with a good healthy dose of baby talk: GA-GA-GOOO! I GA-GA for THE MUMMY! GOO-GOO! GA-GA!
Moriarty will always be my whore, cause he by Tall_Boy	Apr 29th, 1999 05:21:07 PM

Moriarty will always be my whore, cause he's the one that I ador by Tall_Boy	Apr 29th, 1999 05:24:25 PM
Just wanted to work in a song lyric here. can't wait to see the flick! Moriarty's reviews always rock, I trust his judgement, so good job, you evil bastard, you. PS- Does anybody know how to play the guitar solo from the above-mentioned song? PPS- GODDAMN SLIP OF THE FINGER MUTHA FUCKIN' DOUBLE POST!!!! Ahh, I feel better. Time to listen to "Duel of the Fates" for the first time...
Heh by Brimley	Apr 29th, 1999 09:57:50 PM
um...mummy, and uh, yeah. Actually, I've always thought Brendan Fraiser was a pretty good actor. However, I've had too much to drink. Does anybody else get pissed when the talk back compresses your paragraphs? Slap me silly and pass me another "Rusty Nail"! Sincerely, The Brimley
Wrath of 82 by BRAK	Apr 29th, 1999 10:17:00 PM
How could you leave out ST:The Wrath of Khan? I dragged my younger brother to see Poltergiest and ST:TWoK back to back. He still dosn't know what hit him. I'm hoping I can pull this stunt again this summer.
by Integra	Apr 30th, 1999 12:20:45 AM

Lucas by Integra	Apr 30th, 1999 12:32:25 AM
Interesting to see how ppl either want phantom to be great or horrible. He (Lucas) seems to embody the pop icon like few others. I personally dont care much for the Star wars series, always thought sci-fi was Asimov, Ellison, and Bradbury. Star wars is great pop eye candy and a good romp at the theatre. Would be cool to actually see real sci-fi made into film, or even fantasy. What could possibly be a cooler usage for cg then one of Moorcocks characters (Elric ) running about with a fleet of dragons. Need more Thing's (favorite horror movie), Dragonslayers, Excaliburs. Not another cheesy effects laden remake of Kurosawa, Lensman, and explicit outtakes of roman history. Make Foundation and Earth. or if you want buddy flicks, Caves of Steel. Dunwich Horror could be done well.
Star Trek? unemotional? by Palmer Eldritch	Apr 30th, 1999 02:52:32 AM
How could anyone think STAR TREK: Wrath Of Kahn (THE best s.f. adventure movie of the 80s BAR NONE) was unemotional? I'll take a rousing action packed story dealing with Humankind's ability to take technology intended for creation and twist it into a means of destruction, spiced up with a bit of Herman Melville Epic meets Alexandre Dumas Revenge Drama over a bunch of mystical mumbo jumbo and obsucated hippy nonsense about "trusting you feelings", any day of the week. ************ ************** "From Hell's Dark heart I stab at thee!"
Credit due by Rogue_2	May 2nd, 1999 06:39:40 PM
Blade Runner rocks! Thats all I have to say, you're right about it not being given enough credit.
Arnold Vosloo by erica	Sep 1st, 1999 10:20:50 PM
Summer may be over in the US but The Mummy is still giving surprises in the rest of the world. Despite misgivings about spending 2 hours watching a bandaged drunk staggering about town with Brendan Fraser, I left The Mummy with a few pleasant surprises. One, Fraser's not as idiotic as I thought he'd look (only seen pics of him, not even one movie!); second, no bandages, no drunk. A diehard Indy Jones fan, I found the movie vastly entertaining and every good thing that's already been said in this sites' reviews. BUT - the main surprise? Arnold Vosloo...where has this man been all my life??? So impressed I've been with Vosloo, I actually endured a van damme movie, Hard Target, and confirmed forever, my obsession with Vosloo. When I die, I want to be mummified with my DVD of The Mummy, my pics of Vosloo and my favourite wavs. files from Hard Target. Think I'm crazy? So're the hordes of Vosloo fans who hog the AV forums with postings in the thousands after seeing him The Mummy. Vosloo, though, is more elusive than a mummy. No one knows what he's up to since he was resurrected and there's a rumour going round that he's being considered to play the mature Anakin Skywalker in Episode 3. After what he can do to a 3,000 year old corpse, some people think he'll prevent Episode 3 from becoming another menace. Me, being a fan of the first trilogy and sorely disappointed with Ep.1, Vosloo would be the only reason I'd risk watching another Episode.
Note to self: Watch Lawrence of Arabia again. by Wolfpack	Jul 22nd, 2006 10:45:43 PM
Saw it when I was a kid. I remember being entertained, but I was probably too young to fully appreciate it.

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Moriarty examines THE MUMMY

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