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Moriarty Pulls A Knife On Rob Zombie’s HALLOWEEN And Talks About HATCHET And POUGHKEEPSIE And S&MAN And More!

FIST by Edmundo	Aug 31st, 2007 06:48:17 AM
I AM FIST
FIST by Edmundo	Aug 31st, 2007 06:48:18 AM
I AM FIST
First! by Yeti	Aug 31st, 2007 06:48:40 AM
heh
I double fisted you all! by Edmundo	Aug 31st, 2007 06:49:13 AM
YEAH!!! HOW DOES IT FEEL, YOU SLAGS!!!
Edmundo it doesn't count if you leave out the "r" by Yeti	Aug 31st, 2007 06:50:09 AM
Spell much?
I DOUBLE FISTED YOU, YETI... by Edmundo	Aug 31st, 2007 06:50:52 AM
YEAH!! TAKE THAT, SASQUATCH!!!!
I DOUBLE FISTED YOU, YETI... by Edmundo	Aug 31st, 2007 06:50:53 AM
YEAH!! TAKE THAT, SASQUATCH!!!!
I question the reasoning behind remaking this film by Yeti	Aug 31st, 2007 06:51:59 AM
When the original still holds up quite nicely.
Well fine then, Edmundo but at least buy me breakfast by Yeti	Aug 31st, 2007 06:54:30 AM
and promise you'll call (bats eyelashes)
Halloween III is a great horror movie by CuervoJones	Aug 31st, 2007 06:54:43 AM
I say that.
Really, Yeti? I think the reasoning's obvious. by Edmundo	Aug 31st, 2007 06:55:21 AM
MONEY. Now, join me. Lemme teach you the way of the fist.
I love Halloween III! by Trazadone	Aug 31st, 2007 06:56:39 AM
It's the classic "mad scientist" movie. He wants to destroy the world for no particular reason. I love the bleak ending. I'd just move to an island.
3,257 words, did Harry write this? by Trazadone	Aug 31st, 2007 07:04:13 AM
Jesus, Moriarty, I generally love your reviews but, dude, trim the fat!
Reason behind remaking this film by JackRabbitSlim	Aug 31st, 2007 07:07:16 AM
Because TCM remake made 80 mil on a 12 mil budget. And yeah - its all about the green.
I agree Jackrabbitslim by Trazadone	Aug 31st, 2007 07:11:05 AM
Halloween will make all its money back this weekend, guaranteed. then, when it comes out on DVD in 3 months it will make a ton more dough.
Well if you had Jessica Biel's rack in HALLOWEEN... by spud mcspud	Aug 31st, 2007 07:12:01 AM
...maybe even I would go and see it! As it is, I think Rob Zombie's HILLBILLYWE'EN may be a bargain matinee movie on a wet Sunday for me, or possibly a wait-for-the-DVD. It'll be out on DVD by - hey! - Hallowe'en anyway. Fuck HILLBILLYWE'EN. Another footnote in the long, long line of shit remakes. Though it CANNOT possibly be as bad as the remade FOG. Can it?
Rob Zombie+Artist=Bwah Ha Ha Ha. by C.K. Lamoo	Aug 31st, 2007 07:14:39 AM
Oh come down off the mountain, Moriarty. It's another schlock horror movie by another schlock director. You act as if this is a review of "Cries and Whispers" and Rob Zombie is Bergman. Here's what it's about. Killing as many teenagers as possible in as gory as manner as possible, especially girls, who represent the cute girls that won't go out with you but who will have sex with other guys. Yes, kill them all, using obvious phallic symbols just so they get the message. Really, Moriarty, the more you take this stuff seriously the bigger a poser you become. Grab some popcorn, sit back and stop trying to be the Judith Christ of Slasher Films.
I agree C.K. Lamoo by Trazadone	Aug 31st, 2007 07:24:22 AM
I love this stuff but I know not to take it too seriously. This review is overkill. It's akin to disecting the nuances of a Smurf cartoon.
Can't Zombie just get... by Kid Z	Aug 31st, 2007 07:30:53 AM
...White Zombie back together and play some f***in' music again? Who the hell decided he was a film director anyway?
"a generation of re-tellings" by eppdude	Aug 31st, 2007 07:34:16 AM
Mori, I really think we are already there. Sad to say. But I have to ask, though: if you are going to make a Halloween 9, isn't it better to TRY to do something different, rather than another photo-copied sequel? Even if it DOES NOT work, I have to at least give Rob Zombie credit for ATTEMPTING to do something different. Enjoyed the review.
Thanks Mori.. by Cysquatch	Aug 31st, 2007 07:35:38 AM
You just saved me $9.25!! Too bad because I love Devils Rejects and I actually held out some hope for this.
Thanks for the review... by Midnightxpress	Aug 31st, 2007 07:36:10 AM
Personally I like long reviews which let off stream and go after the reasons a film didn't work...will certainly ensure I don't ever pay to see this POS...
Typicial, AICN hypes this sick puppy for months. by C.K. Lamoo	Aug 31st, 2007 07:36:50 AM
And the takes a big dump on it when it comes out. Don't you realize you are 50 percent responsible for anyone who sees this turd?
sigh . . . more prequel bashing in an unrelated story by darthflagg	Aug 31st, 2007 07:39:02 AM
I don't think complaining about seeing Vader and Boba as kids, and the Death Star being built are good criticisms of the prequels at all. If you didn't want to see the history of those things, then why would you fucking watch the films to begin with? What did people expect? I know, they wanted sequels with an ageing Han, Luke and Leia. I bet if Lucas had made them instead people would have loved them no matter how bad they were.
Americans do something RIGHT !! by barnaby jones	Aug 31st, 2007 07:48:44 AM
Don't pay to see Rob Zombie take a shit in your local cinemas this weekend. Make a stand, you can put an end to this remake madness. All it takes is a flop of massive proportions and Halloween 07 could be it !! You can do it Americans, i have faith.
DarthFlagg... by TheRealMoriarty	Aug 31st, 2007 07:48:44 AM
... it's not "bashing." It's an explanation of why some people simply don't like the prequels. It's a very real reason. It's a good reason. If you don't share that reason, that's fine. But dial the anger down a little, man. No one's attacking you personally if they feel that way, and I see a larger issue in that statement which directly relates to HALLOWEEN. It's not "unrelated," it's part of the point I'm making.
I will NOT be seeing this by WesReviews	Aug 31st, 2007 07:48:48 AM
And I urge others to avoid. Hollywood has GOT to stop this. NO MORE REMAKES!
Zombie Note To Self : Wife cannot act... by quantize	Aug 31st, 2007 07:52:11 AM
remember that
Lessons un-learned. by Gorrister	Aug 31st, 2007 07:56:11 AM
It's kinda odd that Lucas took Yoda's advise "You must unlearn what you have learned" and applied it to his storytelling. Worse is that other writers adopted it as well. There is definately such a thing as too much information in storytelling. You have to give the audience what they need in order to love/hate the characters, but you can easily flood them with so much useless information that it ruins the story. Using the original Star Wars, for example, we didn't reallly NEED to know anything more about how Vader became the evil bastard he was other than the info Obi-Wan gave us. After learning he was a whiny little bitch who got passed over for a promotion before becoming the terror of the galaxy kinda ruins the image. Same goes for Boba Fett. Sometimes mystery is what makes characters so appealing. Making the Star Wars prequels was tantamount to JK Rowling deciding to writer the story about Harry Potter's years living in the Cupboard Under the Stairs.
Really? A "good" reason? by durkin	Aug 31st, 2007 08:00:58 AM
"I don’t give a shit where the stuff I love comes from! I just love the stuff I love!" Wow. What a narrow-minded approach to art and storytelling. I'm sure glad Patton wasn't doing standup when Godfather II came out. "Do you like Don Corleone?" "Oh, yeah. What a great character. Such a badass..." "Because in the second one, you get to see him as a little kid!" "ARRGGHH!!"
Sigh! by supersize	Aug 31st, 2007 08:01:48 AM
I love the halloween film's !I like all of them except 8 I had hopes for this not high hopes but hopes that myers possibly might be made actually scary once again .Instead it's a horrid piece of shit. To top it off hugely boring
I think Mori's got Zombie pegged. by rev_skarekroe	Aug 31st, 2007 08:02:34 AM
Maybe if he directed a film written by someone else he could help get the "monster kid" stuff out of his system.
Damn you by supersize	Aug 31st, 2007 08:03:50 AM
Rob Zombie !Hopefully Bacon kicking some ass will make me forget about this http://rogerebert.suntimes.com /apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20 070830/REVIEWS/70817018
The reason why Moriarty's reviews are so good... by brokentusk	Aug 31st, 2007 08:10:45 AM
... for me, at least, is because he genuinely seems to want every film to work, and when they don't, he dissects them piece by piece, explaining in detail exactly why he felt they didn't. Really good read, and very well-written.
Hated all of Zombie's movies thus far by Gorrister	Aug 31st, 2007 08:13:08 AM
They always sound great on the surface, but they turn out to be tripe. Never really thought of it too much before, but Moriarty seems to have a point about Zombie not really giving a damn about the characters who are struggling against his 'monsters'. I have to admit though, being a BIG Marx Brothers fan, that I was very put-off by his naming most of the characters in his other movies after Groucho Marx characters (Rufus T. Firefly from "Duck Soup", Captain Spalding from "Animal Crackers", Otis Driftwood from "A Night at the Opera"). A tip-of-the-hat to older movies is one thing, but this is practically an ass raping.
Most importantly Mori... by billyhitchcock	Aug 31st, 2007 08:15:45 AM
...what does Carpenter think of this? have you talked to him about it? has he seen it?! is it even on his radar?
mori by The Real MiraJeff	Aug 31st, 2007 08:16:40 AM
1. hell of a review... 2. can't wait to see Poughkeepsie, heard nothing but good things about it... 3. glad you spoke up about not being the biggest fan of Hatchet. It's not a very good film, but at least it's not ashamed of its B-movie status. i think in 5 years time, hatchet will have developed a cult following (which I won't be a part of) and i agree, halloween will be forgotten and left to idle on the DVD shelves and in bargain bins... we deserved better... would love to get a look at the work print-- how does a rape fit into the film in the place of that laughable prison transfer scene?
Horror needs a Judd Apatow to reset the genre. by Spikey	Aug 31st, 2007 08:21:46 AM
To humanise it with real characters and some good old fashioned dialogue. People used to talk and communicate in horror films. It wasnt always just 30 second spooky camera pans to set up mood.
Eat it zombie! by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 08:22:15 AM
You fucking hillbilly hack. Your movies suck ass. Take your remake abortion and shove it. Good review, Mori.
Carpenter by Gorrister	Aug 31st, 2007 08:22:33 AM
After "Escape from LA", I think Carpenter has forfit his rights to insult sequels/remakes of his earlier works (seeing as 'Escape from LA' was both remake AND sequel rolled into one).
Is this really a surprise? by Lou Stools	Aug 31st, 2007 08:23:08 AM
Coming from a guy named Rob Zombie!? Oooooo…scaaaary! What, was Frank Werewolf and Stan Mummy already taken?
Lou Stools by Boba Fat	Aug 31st, 2007 08:26:35 AM
That's Mr Zombie to you. Rob to his friends or just plain old Ro Zo to his close family.
Forget "Hatchet." What about "Cleaver?" by eppdude	Aug 31st, 2007 08:29:38 AM
Danny Baldwin is supposed to be amazing. heh.
Saw it the other night by Knightsong	Aug 31st, 2007 08:30:33 AM
The first half of this movie is pure Rob Zombie, which isn't a good thing in my opinion. Why does anyone who wants to make something gritty and real, feel the need to drop the F-Bomb constantly? The first 10 minutes of this movie shocks and awes us with the word Fuck like it was the law to use it every other word. He uses it so much it's comical. But his version of Mikey's origins are so stereo-typical that it's laughable, Stripper Mom, Mom's abusive boyfriend/thing, sisters is an uncaring slut, and let's not forget Michael's innocent baby sister. Everything in the movie during the first half is unbelievably predictable. The second half of the movie changes pace and becomes an homage to the original Halloween, for the most part. The movie slows down considerably and while he could not have made Michael any more powerful and impressive looking in everything he does, the movie just lacks on every other level. It entertains, but does not compel. It does not draw you in, so you become a bored voyeur that travels with him from murder-to-murder. I liked this film better than his other movies, but that's not saying much in my opinion.
remakes by pierrotlefou	Aug 31st, 2007 08:41:58 AM
suck, at least just be "inspired" by the original material, like this "last house on the left-ish" short http://tinyurl.com/yno7wf
MiraJeff by RenoNevada2000	Aug 31st, 2007 08:53:22 AM
In the rape scene, the younger asshole guard and a buddy of his bring a teen girl who is a new inmate into Michael Myers' cell and rape her while he sits at his desk making another mask. It's only once they start fiddling with his masks that he snaps and kills the two before escaping.
Memories of murder by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 09:00:59 AM
Just give it up. This movie has been shat upon and rightfully shat upon. Why are you bothering to defend this?
JESUS, MEMORIES! by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 09:12:48 AM
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
I love this system by theceure	Aug 31st, 2007 09:15:50 AM
You guys keep bashing great movies. It kind of lets me know what to go see. One thing you people forget to remember is that these filmakers are not making movies for MOVIE GEEKS, they are making them for people. You guys can go on nitpicking every little detail you did not like or you can learn to accept it for what it is and enjoy. The original Halloween was a classic and a great movie for fans of the slasher genre but most people will say it is boring. But yet we love it because it is a classic. Oh and yes rednecks going crazy and killing people is good fun. Hence why I have seen Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 so many times. Some of you may disagree which is my point exactly.
AWESOME by bc1970	Aug 31st, 2007 09:17:09 AM
I've felt the same way about RZ for so long now. Zombie's been posing for a looong time. Mori's description of Zombie's cinematic malaise can be applied to his musical career as well. It's the same shtick over and over, chugga chugga chugga. Mori's been holding back on this movie (and the hollywood system), as have a lot of people, hoping for better. Again, though, we get what's expected. Way to unload!
This sucks. Why? by buffywrestling	Aug 31st, 2007 09:20:06 AM
Because I will never have an opinion of this film in the theater. And it's not even that I want to hate it - I just know I will. The one and only thing that made Halloween such a treasure was that it was SCARY. The blood and gore was minimal compared to other outings. But it had sound and tone and being alone. The Face came out of nowhere - you didn't expect him, you didn't know where he would show up next. He was DEATH. DEATH doesn't have a childhood and DEATH doesn't need a reason. That is what makes it so fucking SCARY..
No, Memories. by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 09:24:46 AM
"I though the idea beyind a remake was to REINVENT the rule,s and not follow the same rules of the old franchise" There's no fucking reason to remake this movie. /talkback
Can't wait to see "S and Man" by CarmillaVonDoom	Aug 31st, 2007 09:33:54 AM
Right after Des2ent....ugh
THANK YOU MORIARTY. by Mr. Nice Gaius	Aug 31st, 2007 09:35:04 AM
Not only do I appreciate the review, but I'm glad to see you take the filmmakers and their execs to task. It's good to see you back in razor form. In my opinion, this is a movie Zombie (or anyone else for that matter) should not have made. And I can't imagine any true fan of the genre was clamoring for this...there's just no need. It's right up there with the TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE remake and other braindead "reimaginings". They seem to serve no other purpose than as a training ground for up and coming directors and apparent excuses to use modern filmstock and better practical gore effects. Like I've said before in Talkback: WHERE HAS THE HORROR GONE?!
This review should be emailed to every studio exec. by Nate Champion	Aug 31st, 2007 09:37:01 AM
That's right, fuckers... THIS is what we think of your fucking shit-ass remakes, sequels, and mindless drudge week after week after week. Grow a pair and see if you can't find someone with something to say instead of a poseur like Zombie who thinks being a fan of horror movies makes him a filmmaker.
Whats wrong with you people... by theceure	Aug 31st, 2007 09:47:23 AM
.....is this the way movie buffs are? I remember when 1000 corpses came out. I was so hyped I couldnt wait to see it, had to travel 2 hour to find a theatre that was showing it. Loved the movie, my friends loved the movie, heck eveyone I know loves the movie and we watch it every halloween for fun. But then I come home and look at this site and there is a review bashing it call it the worst movie ever made. I almost boycoted this site forever. I use to come here to read reviews and see if I want to see a particular movie but now I come here just to watch a bunch of fanboys bitch about this and that about movies. Most horror movies are bad thats why we love them some of the greatest horror movies ever made are also the worst movies ever made. Usually the ones you bash the most are the best(uhum TRANSFORMERS). They should change the site to yaintitcoolasme.com
Memories by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 09:47:38 AM
the directors for those remakes are good directors. Compare them to Rob Zombie? BWHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Seriously man, Zombie can't even direct his own fucking movies well and you expect him to pull off a remake?
Memories by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 09:49:20 AM
all i get from your posts is just whining and crying. "Waah, you can't bash this movie, you don't understand it, waah!" shut up.
Amen by bluebottle	Aug 31st, 2007 10:07:22 AM
Bang on Mori. Summed up everything I was feeling, right down to the growing of the balls on the executives. God I hope this movie tanks at the BO, otherwise we're all doomed.
The movie sucks, memories by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 10:28:59 AM
Live with it, bitch! No amount of whining can change that fact
Holy crap! MORI hated Zombie's HALLOWEEN?!! by Mike_D	Aug 31st, 2007 10:34:17 AM
No fucking way! I didnt see that coming!!! ends sarcasm
You hit it right on the head, Mori... by 24200124	Aug 31st, 2007 10:35:06 AM
What's happening in the movie industry is exactly what happened in the music industry. We're getting prepackaged "art" devoid of any and all originality. Executives are more worried about making stuff that'll have kitsch value or that America will feel safe knowing about, and so we are left with an absolute overload of banality. Unless something can be (to quote "The X-Files" movie) programmed, categorized, or easily referenced, it's overlooked and shoved under the mat. To a large scale, the music and movie industries are saying, "Would you rather do something that the average American knows and loves, or would you rather take a chance at showing them something they just might not be comfortable with?" And sadly, we're traveling down that road that Mike Judge has predicted that we'd travel down in his film "Idiocracy". There's another example of good humor completely wasted by people who didn't want someone pointing out the shortcomings of this country. All these remakes, all these reimaginings aren't going to mean SHIT in a few years. When are people going to realize that classics are CLASSICS FOR A FUCKING GOOD REASON? The voices were original, they were groundbreaking, they were incredible. Instead, we're douched with rehash after rehash, and it's about time that someone kicked some ass "28 Days Later"-style. That movie, at least to me, revolutionized the way that horror films should be made - I know, it's a story as old as "I Am Legend" by Richard Matheson, about the survivors of some catastrophe locking themselves away from the terrors that abound beyond their walls, but at least there was something new and fresh about it. "Grindhouse" failed because America wasn't comfortable with the notion that two "Hollywood" directors could actually have fun and be themselves. American media has gotten so stale that we're just relying on what is known to make a quick buck. There's a song by Juniper Lane (local DC band) that talks about "prepackaged art defeating the artisan" - it could not be closer to the truth. I really wish someone would step up and knock one out of the park with some fucking balls!
Yup, i agree memories by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 10:36:21 AM
I won't be the judge of how the movie is, you will. Until you see it, STFU and stop defending this obvious POS!
I find it ironic... by Sledge Hammer	Aug 31st, 2007 10:45:14 AM
...that a site that blindly praises the uberhack that is Eli Roth can then turn around and bash Zombie for doing pretty much the same thing (only usually doing so to far better effect), something that they've been doing all the way along this one. just seems odd to me.
And on the subject of Rob Zombie: by 24200124	Aug 31st, 2007 10:57:12 AM
Here's what we've got so far, and all of this is just one man's opinion. "House of 1000 Corpses" - Rob Zombie's first movie. It was a good horror film - felt a little like a student horror film from someone who wanted to be Oliver Stone, but the resulting imagery is some stuff that is not easily forgotten. The quick cuts between the film continuity and video footage to show what the Firefly family really was were put to good use, but at the same time, it's a family of hillbillies who cussed up a storm and did crazy shit. Someone mentioned above that they watch this movie every year on Halloween, and I while I don't get that, I think Wash from "Firefly" said it best: "Hey, some people juggle baby geese." I watched this movie opening day in the theaters and then once again on our then-new high definition television on HBO, and I found that while the effort was good, it just wasn't my thing. Not bashing it, just didn't like it. "The Devil's Rejects" - A more straightforward entry for Rob Zombie, showing great promise and great execution. For someone expecting another sort-of "student film", I was very surprised by the maturity that Zombie put forth as a filmmaker. Still, it was a movie about crazy hillbillies who cussed too much. Great use of music, though. I appreciated this movie quite a bit, although I don't think I'd watch it every year for on Halloween, which brings us to our next subject... "Halloween" - again, with the hillbillies who cuss too much. Can we say that Zombie's crazy-hillbilly routine is wearing a little thin? You can't explain three movies (one of them completely unrelated to the first two) the same way. It's like he's a one-trick pony who feels the need to shower the audiences in blood, gore, and relentless use of the word "fuck". This new "Halloween" should never have been made in the first place, because it basically tried all of the things that were great about the original and dropped gargantuan piles of shit all over it. The trouble is that this film is going to ruin the legacy that the original created for itself by dumbing down an iconic horror movie character, thus making it easier for audiences to process. I'm sorry, but it was GREAT not really knowing what drove Michael Myers to kill - he was every bit the "boogeyman" that lurked under your bed, waiting to jump out at you. But with this new version, we see that, whoa, kids who come from fucked-up families are going to turn out more fucked up than their parents are! Ooooh! It's time to sack up and make something that audiences are going to appreciate again. It's like this movie was shat into existence and will probably wind up being a festering turd that will hopefully change the way we're supposed to do things, like... have a distinct voice with which to tell stories? Then again, I'm just armchair quarterbacking.
This Doesn't Surprise Me by ChiTownsBest	Aug 31st, 2007 10:58:17 AM
I watched the workprint and wasn't really impressed at all. I had a feeling the finished version would be worse and not better. It's too bad that Rob seemed to feel that Laurie Strode meant nothing to the story. Personally, I could care less about how Michael became a killer. He was pure evil in the the was Dr. Loomis. The fact that he had no real reason for killing except that he was a psycho was what made him scary. Not anymore though. This movie will be a hit regardless because of name recognition and maybe we'll get more of Laurie's story in the next one and less of who Michael is.
NO! Hell no,ChiTown. by GurzEon	Aug 31st, 2007 11:03:43 AM
I hope there's no next one for this.
Wow, Mori, extremely well written. by Daddylonghead	Aug 31st, 2007 11:05:27 AM
Talk about eloquence man, I think you hit a new level here. Sorry it had to be such a depressing subject, but at least your writing itself is a pleasure to read.
Bravo Mori... by BGDAWES	Aug 31st, 2007 11:07:01 AM
That was a hell of an article. The thing I can't get over, after reading Halloween reviews, is that Zombie turned Michael's parents into child abusers. I know Mike's parents were only seen briefly in the original but weren't they normal suburban parents? I always thought that was the cool part about these films. Michael was a normal kid, with normal parents, in a normal neighborhood, with a normal (albeit slutty) sister - and he just snapped with no explaination. That's what made him scary.
Star Wars song? by Darth Thoth	Aug 31st, 2007 11:18:50 AM
What's the name of it? Thanks.
RZ wants insignificant. by bc1970	Aug 31st, 2007 11:20:33 AM
That was the whole push behind Grindhouse. "These are movies nobody appreciated. blah-blah." All this is complementing him I'm sure.
Halloween III is lots of fun. by El Scorcho	Aug 31st, 2007 11:21:41 AM
Thank you for agreeing Mori. It's just so silly and bizarre that I love it.
THE POUGHKEEPSIE TAPES overrated by TheMachinist	Aug 31st, 2007 11:45:15 AM
Saw it a few weeks ago during a dub session. What a self indulgent piece of crap. The constant use of harsh static as a transition tool was annoying and sloppy. I did not buy into most of the "real life" interviews. I felt the actors were trying too hard to convince the audience of the horror on the tapes. And they are pretty gruesome and disturbing for the most part. some cool sequences. On the whole i think that movie feels its too smart for its genre. And i feel that it is one of the first horror movies that deserves the label of torture porn cause there is little else to the movie. Another thing that annoys me is the killer seems like a collage of a bunch of stories I read about in criminal psych textbooks.
I don’t give a shit where the stuff I love comes from!" by President Evil	Aug 31st, 2007 12:17:10 PM
"I just love the stuff I love!” ...and yet you all jizzed your shorts over BATMAN BEGINS.
The point of the Patton Oswalt joke by zooch	Aug 31st, 2007 12:28:43 PM
Is that the he wanted to see Darth Vader and didn't get to see Darth Vader. If this didn't have grown up Mike with the mask and knife killing people in it, you'd have a point. I'm so sick of this site trashing this film. They finally hire a director who respects the genre and character of Michael Myers(Zombie even spoke in the Halloween documentary). They hire him to give us a proper remake, which if you're going to do a remake it's the proper way to go. I'm not saying Rob Zombie can do no wrong, I'm just saying if you were trashing it because it was bad would be one thing. I have to agree with Massa on this one.
Cool by floydtheater07	Aug 31st, 2007 12:48:36 PM
I've lived near Poughkeepsie all my life and now attend college across the river from it, so although the movie is not true, it'll be fun to catch that one when it comes out in the actual city.
theceure and Transformers being the best movie ever. by deadshot07	Aug 31st, 2007 01:20:28 PM
uhum somebody shoot that kid.
Memories of Murder by TVguy4566	Aug 31st, 2007 01:22:29 PM
A couple of things: First, comparing David Lynch to what Mori is describing is way off. Lynch's style is to take an idealist setting and characters and show that behind closed doors there is a lot more seedier and evil going on. Buy doing so, he makes the familiar very unfamiliar. It would be like showing Ward and June Cleaver as SM swingers when the sun goes down. As for the mask, it was explained in the original. It was just happened to be the mask that was there in the hardware store Michael broke into. Carpenter had no significance to the mask except to hide Michael's face. The only other movie Carpenter was involved in at all was Halloween II and that took place several hours after the original was set. Carpenter had nothing to do with the fact that all the other sequels decided to use the same masks.
The workprint is already.... by Mr. Profit	Aug 31st, 2007 01:24:32 PM
All over the streets of NYC for 5 bucks. This movie is totally fucked because I have already heard from 4 people that the DVD is crystal clear and the sound is of good quality.
Also Memories by TVguy4566	Aug 31st, 2007 01:28:49 PM
First you bash people who trash this film who haven't seen it. Then you trash Mori for watching the movie and trashing it by using faulty logic. Then you claim you haven't even seen the movie. So how can you attack Mori for not liking the movie that he has actually seen because he is wrong based on your opinion without even see the movie? Hypocrite, thy name is Memories-of-Murder.
The remake Zombie SHOULD have directed was.... by Mr. Profit	Aug 31st, 2007 01:35:32 PM
The Last House on the Left. That type of shit is more his speed. If the upcoming Platinum Dunes produced "F13th" remake is better than this, it will just prove what a shame and wasted opportunity this was. Sure all the sequels were weak. And techinically "Halloween" was already remade with Part 4. But the reason this film was even made was to re-start a dead franchise and make more money. The film Zombie made is all over the place and lacks any sort of real mainstream appeal. It may not bomb completely this weekend. But the bitch has no legs. The thought of it making any sort of "Saw" like money is practically impossible at this point. And that's a fucking shame. Because the character of Michael Myers is better than Jigsaw and any bullshit torture porn Hostel movie. While I am at it Fuck Eli Roth. He gets too much love on this site. Back to Halloween, I'm just shocked at the downturn Zombie made from Rejects to Halloween. He needs to stick to directing. No more writing. Just direct. That's where the majority of his talents lie.
Best review i've read on here in ages by PotSmokinAlien	Aug 31st, 2007 01:52:05 PM
seriously excellent reading. mori, you are the reigning champ of regular writers on this site. (neill cumpston aside, of course)
Hmmm, fisting on AICN... by Stalin vs Predator	Aug 31st, 2007 01:52:55 PM
That could become the new Talkback Fad of the Month. The Snakes on Everything, if you will. Oh, God, what have I just suggested?
Nice find Yobo by SpencerTrilby	Aug 31st, 2007 01:54:27 PM
Nice find... I lol'd... but that's because I haven't seen RHINO yet. Once my wallet is thinner, my laugh will be sadder too. Sneaking seems to be the only way, as far as I'm concerned.
Do we really need 5+ reviews of this movie on AICN? by IAmLegolas	Aug 31st, 2007 01:57:39 PM
Just wondering.
MORIARTY: HOW IS IT INSIGNIFICANT? by TheDohDoh	Aug 31st, 2007 01:59:48 PM
MORIARTY: Look at all of the people on here talking about this fucking movie. It means something to them whether they liked it or not. It's the best freaking horror movie in a while, and definitely the best in the Freddy/Jason/Myers catalogue of recent years. It's one thing to ask studio execs to bring the original (i'm guessing you're finding hollywood a tough business right now as you get into its depths. and good luck to you!), BUT MICHAEL MYERS IS AN ETERNAL CHARACTER. WHAT YOU DON'T REALIZE IS THIS CHARACTER CAN'T DIE. THEY'LL BE MAKING MICHAEL MYERS MOVIES FOR AS LONG AS AMERICAN IS AROUND. So it's great that Zombie brought back the horror and brought it back anew. There's no reason to rip the guy like you just did. Bullshit man.
Simpsons Response To STAR WARS Prequels.... by Buzz Maverik	Aug 31st, 2007 02:02:14 PM
Homer and the kids are watching one of those endless senate scenes about tariffs and trade restrictions. Suddenly, an Imperial Walker smashes through the wall. BART:"Alright! This is what I've been waiting for!" The Walker takes a seat and joins in the debate. Like the SOUTH PARK kids, Bart and Lisa head to Skywalker ranch to straighten Lucas out. In the end, Lucas sees the error of his ways. LISA:"Where are you going, Mr. Lucas?" LUCAS:"To the video store! I'm going back to ripping off old westerns and samurai movies!"
correction... by theceure	Aug 31st, 2007 02:05:10 PM
theceure did not say transformers was the greatest movie ever. He said it was bashed the most on this site but yet it was very good movie. Just like everything else here. Damn does everybody here MISS THE POINT. deadshot07 you are an idiot and need to kill yourself for the good of all.
re- invention ,re-imagining by abner pepper	Aug 31st, 2007 02:05:52 PM
How the fuck can you re-invent something.Once it's been invented thats it.
Question for Drew by mjbok1	Aug 31st, 2007 02:07:56 PM
This is no way meant to be a bash, but I have to ask you a question. The original review was from a workprint, which obviously the reviewer shouldn't have had since he didn't know it was the final cut. Then after you saw if you asked someone to bring over a workprint so you could see the differences. Isn't this wrong? You have (rightly so) railed on people for piracy, most notably surrounding The Hulk. Really, how is this any different? Someone viewing something that they were not supposed to, because they didn't pay for it. I realize that you did go see it in a theater, but the second time you didn't. Since the reviewer didn't know it wasn't the final cut he obviously shouldn't have been watching it. And I know that you were curious about the differences between the theatrical version and the workprint, but that is no different than if I had seen it at a theater then downloaded a torrent of it to see the differences. Isn't what the reviewer (and you) did wrong? After all each viewing that you didn't pay for is money taken away from the studios.
OUCH. by oceanic86	Aug 31st, 2007 02:09:56 PM
None of this surprises me after reading the script reviews, and seeing the various clips and trailers. This movie looks like crap.
"For a Few Dollars"? by KanekoFan	Aug 31st, 2007 02:14:39 PM
There is no such movie. Leone made "Fistful of Dollars," which was a re-make of Kurosawa's "Yojimbo," and followed it with a sequel called "For a Few Dollars More." And do you really think that people were "fine with" "Yojimbo" and then "loved" "Fistful of Dollars"? I mean, I really dig "Fistful," but I don't know anybody who thinks it's better than "Yojimbo." And I certainly have never met anyone who thinks "The Magnificent Seven," as good a movie as it is, even approaches "Seven Samurai." Heck, I'm not sure I know anybody who'd rank the "Cape Fear" re-make over the original. Most of the other examples you mention are adaptations of stories that didn't begin as films, and therefore fall into a completely different category. Houston's "The Maltese Falcon" isn't a re-make of the earlier versions, it is an adaptation of a novel that happened to have been adapted twice before.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO by Midol Boy	Aug 31st, 2007 02:16:00 PM
Damn you, Rob Zombie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Painfully Sad by ChestBumpingFatKids	Aug 31st, 2007 02:16:41 PM
This reminds me of the Miss Teen USA debacle from a few days ago. You know - the one with Miss North Carolina or whoever the fuck she was? This is just like that - there's nothing more sad than seeing an imbecile (in this case, Zombie) trying so hard to be deep and meaningful.
QUESTION FOR TALKBACKERS by TheDohDoh	Aug 31st, 2007 02:30:12 PM
Anyone remember what song starts the theatrical version? In the work print it's Monster Mash, but they changed it for the theatrical. Not sure why. Obviously, if I can't remember it, it's not as good. Thanks dudes!! It's killing me trying to remember
Preach it, brutha Mori! by KCMOSHer	Aug 31st, 2007 02:45:45 PM
Man, you hit a lot of targets dead on with this piece. I haven't seen the movie, so I can't comment about the specifics (although, if true, I agree with you 100%) but your commentary on horror in general, man that's true. A movie like Behind The Mask is left to a primarily DTV release while this is on thousands of screens? For that matter, even more obscure stuff like Altered or Toolbox Murders? Something is really, really broken in the movie industry.
Not My Michael Myers by Jabber_Jaw	Aug 31st, 2007 02:48:36 PM
My Halloween was already made. It already scared the living shit out of me years ago. This new killer is not the Michael Myers who gave me nightmares, that Michael is still hiding behind trees watching, waiting to kill, giving me goosebumps as i recall seeing his shadow and that stark white mask. Why do i need a new Halloween and a new Michael Myers when the one i remember was so embedded into my childhood. He was and still is the boogieman... i wish hollywood would stop fucking with perfection.
A few false notes by Joel@eeriepa	Aug 31st, 2007 02:50:18 PM
I agree with Darthflagg that the Patton Oswalt Prequel thing doesn't fit with Halloweens issues. I have no doubt that Patton didn't like the idea of going back and seeing the beginnings of the Star Wars mythos, but the choice to tell that story has nothing to do with the quality of the prequels- it's HOW the story of the prequels was told, not the fact that Lucas chose to tell that specific story that was the problem. Honestly I don't know anyone who didn't like the idea of exploring Star Wars' past. In fact, it was a much smarter choice then doing more sequels, because the original trilogy BEGGED to have it's beginnings told. Star Wars was SUPPOSED to have a history, Halloween (more specifically- Michael Myers) was not. I also disagree that Halloween 2 was a bad film and retrofitted the Laurie/Michael relationship. Watch the Halloween DVD with the extended cut- the sister connection was there from the beginning. Halloween 2 picks up right where Halloween left off, and does a pretty damn good job of keeping the mood set in the first film. Michael wandering the neighborhood as the news travels of his exploits is fantastic, and very much in-line with the first film- paced with a feeling of uneasiness. Not to mention there are a ton of threads and little connections that really make Halloween 1 and 2 a sold whole. Loomis sacrificing himself to stop Michael makes a lot of sense.
Joel@eeriepa, that sister stuff wasn't original by KanekoFan	Aug 31st, 2007 03:11:01 PM
The cut of the original Halloween that includes scenes alluding to Laurie being Michael's sister was prepared for TV distribution when Halloween 2 was made, and those were new scenes shot specifically to be inserted into that cut. They are not deleted material from the original film.
A lot of excellent points made... by shanedugg2000	Aug 31st, 2007 03:17:39 PM
Unfortunately, for a movie to be daring and completely original is a massive financial risk anymore. Look at Grindhouse. I saw it twice at the theater - both times the entire audience loved it... and yet a box office bomb. I will grab both movies on DVD, then the theatrical cut of Grindhouse when that is released next year, to do my part. But the wheels are spinning off this runaway train. The next generation of cinema goers will be weened on youtube skateboarders getting their nuts kabonged and not Scorcese or Kubrick. So let's all get ready to enjoy Ashton Kutchner in Taxi Driver 2010 - Travis Bickle Buck Em Down Yo!
And yet, Transformers remains a steaming pile of shit. by TheMachinist	Aug 31st, 2007 03:18:27 PM
I don't see how anyone can defend that fucking disgrace of a summer blockbuster. Poorly shot action sequences where its hard to tell what's going on half the time or if you're looking at a robot's face or elbow. Metal mouth's that look like the devil's asshole. And that ridiculous GM commercial before the final confrontation. WHAT THE HELL DID THEY MOVE THE FIGHT TO DOWNTOWN LA WHEN THEY WERE RIGHT NEXT TO A FUCKING UNPOPULATED DESERT? Fuck Michael Bay.
Ah, but Memories-of-Murder... by brokentusk	Aug 31st, 2007 03:19:09 PM
... the difference between the remakes that you mentioned (the ones that actually exist, I mean), is that those were remakes of films that were not regarded as classics works of cinema. In fact, hardly anyone had seen those films until certain directors looked at them and said, "You know, I think I can tell this story in a different way than the original approached it." In other words - there was an honest REASON behind remaking those films. You cannot use that same logic for remaking a film like HALLOWEEN, which is a. not that old, b. has been seen by many, many people and c. is regarded as a CLASSIC work of American horror cinema. Your argument just does not work.
Could someone clarify for me... by Dr. Chim Richalds	Aug 31st, 2007 03:19:46 PM
this argument that Zombie did NOT try to explain Myers in the movie? If that were the case, then what's the point of the extended childhood sequence?
An addendum to my post above. by brokentusk	Aug 31st, 2007 03:32:22 PM
Sure, some remakes were made of extremely prolific films (like in the case of THE SEVEN SUMARAI and THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN), but as I said before, there was a very strong case for remaking the film - that of wanting to tell the same basic story but from a different perspective, creating a clear difference, even though the basic story is the same. I have not seen HALLOWEEN, so I really can't sit here and rip it to pieces fairly, but the reaction that most people had of being utterly revolted at the idea of remaking the film (before the film was even made) stems from the fact that there is absolutely no NEED to remake what is regarded as a classic modern film. Now, if someone in Japan decided to remake HALLOWEEN and fused the familiar story into Japanese cinematic conventions - THAT would be an example of a case for remaking the film.
For all the critisms of remakes and sequels by theycallmemrglass	Aug 31st, 2007 03:32:37 PM
The fact is, we get remakes, we get Re-inventions, we get sequels, we get prequels, we even get remakes of sequels And get this, we also get originals. So we are all spoilt for choice and there is no frign way I got time to see every film that comes out every week. Which means we got choice and we cant see every film we want to see. If we think film makers are wasting time remaking a classic and should be making an original, the film makers dont think so, they have a passion for what they are doing so its up to them and obviously there is a marker otherwise they wouldnt be made in the first place. Personally, I generally hate the idea of remakes but I dont condemn it unless they are remaking something scene for scene and inferiorly so (ex psycho). Where am I going with this? Fuk knows. Just want to be 43rd on the talkback
Hey Mori, about "The Poughkeepsie Tapes"... by Seany-Wan	Aug 31st, 2007 03:53:21 PM
Is it based on Kendall Francois? He was arrested back in 1998 for killing prostitutes in Poughkeespie. He buried their bodies in his house. He told his parents the "smell" was from a dead racoon......
He's kicking himself for not taking the TCM gig... by Gatack	Aug 31st, 2007 03:55:49 PM
Now Halloween has to pay the price for it. Wrong movie for him. http://tinyurl.com/ysumch
TOM ATKINS IN HALLOWEEN III by la_sith	Aug 31st, 2007 03:57:09 PM
Simply awesome. Thanks, Mori! P.S. Halloween 2007 sucks ass. The prequels are great! I'm out.
I enjoyed it by MignolaFan	Aug 31st, 2007 04:00:24 PM
I really like the movie but not as much as I did Devil's, hell I even liked house as a shitty color saturated 70's throwback that it was, stupid popcorn horror fun if you will. Anyway I thought Rob's point in the childhood of Michael was showing that there is nothing you can do, you are born a killer, I mean a loving mother and a therapist every day for 15 years, I assume an average person who got fucked up from a bad upbringing would definately improve if not cure after 15 years of treatment, yet Michael being the soulless killing shark was inpenetrable, you can even seen how hollow the kid is when he says he loves his mom, you know he doesn't mean it, he is jsut pretending to be normal. Sorry for a hige runon sentence, I don't right much anymore but I think my point kind of got across.
Love Hurts by MignolaFan	Aug 31st, 2007 04:05:49 PM
I thought that scene was supposed to be funny? Everyone I saw it with thought it was meant for a laugh. I wanna ask rob, Not sure how Mori is positive it's not.
Exactly. by therobcat	Aug 31st, 2007 04:13:51 PM
I'm glad I'm not the only one who immediately made the Patton Oswalt Star Wars prequel comparison. Jesus christ I don't care to dwell on kiddie Michael or his Natural Born Killers re-tread family. The word "abortion" is tossed out so often these days, but I think it works here... maybe more stillborn... hmmm. I had to rant in my stupid blog last night about this foolish madness... grrrrr www.myspace.com/therobcat
Re-makes and preferences by KanekoFan	Aug 31st, 2007 04:54:15 PM
I'm sure there are some people who prefer "The Magnificent Seven" over "Seven Samurai," but I have never met one in my life, which leads me to suspect that they are in the minority. And since I interpreted your post as being about movies generally regarded as superior to their earlier incarnations, I wanted to dispute that claim. I now get the impression that I'd misinterpreted your point. My mistake. I would disagree with your later claim that the re-make of "Cape Fear" has eclipsed the original in popular consciousness, though. I suspect that the average guy on the street today is equally likely to be familiar with either version, and that if there is a greater awareness of the re-make, its simply a consquence of more of the current movie-going public having been alive at the time that the re-make was released.
Oh, Get Over Yourself, Moriarty by omarthesnake	Aug 31st, 2007 05:36:36 PM
This article needs a lot more apologizing for posting a review OF THE WRONG FUCKING VERSION OF THE MOVIE and a lot less kneejerk bashing of the movie for not being the version you would have created in your geniusness. It was a solidly entertaining movie, Laurie Strode was more sympathetic here than in the first movie where she had ZERO personality, and there were enough good ideas to elevate this past any of the Halloween sequels. You're all so desperate to be hipper-than-Rob and bash his work, you're not even paying attention to the movie you're talking about. I'd rather watch this than any of that SAW shit.
Thanks Memories by Jabber_Jaw	Aug 31st, 2007 05:41:32 PM
For your kind words about my post. I agree with your assessments about most remakes... like The Thing, Magnificent seven etc... I think why so many people have gotten worked up over Halloween is simply because everyone who loves horror movies has such a connection with the original. Ask most people and they say what an impact it had on them. Myers was such a calculated mysterious bad ass. When i first heard of the remake to Carpenters "The Fog" (another one of my favorites) i was kind of excited.... until i saw it. When hearing of Halloween my first and only reaction was "how dare they!!!" NOT Halloween!! That movie accomplished everything it possibly could with me, that watching the remake would almost be like cheating on the original. Some movies you just get attached to, they become part of your growing up.
I Go to the Same Place for All My Workprint Screenings by Birdys Piano Teacher	Aug 31st, 2007 05:52:27 PM
It's called any torrent site.
I liked Transformers by barnaby jones	Aug 31st, 2007 05:56:23 PM
i also like the prequel trilogy
Did anyone else just catch Memories... by Space oddity	Aug 31st, 2007 06:09:26 PM
comparison of this to Citizen Kane? Is it possible Rob Zombie is Memorie and maybe the inordinate amount of time he's spent pre-defending this film that he's supposedly never seen is the reason this movie sucks so hard?
Halloween II? by darthbinks1220	Aug 31st, 2007 06:17:49 PM
This flick is miserable next to Resurrection. I'll take Busta Rhyme's dropkick any day over Zombie's "reimagining".
MORI MASTURBATES FURIOUSLY W/ "GOTTA SHIT" MASK by Puddleglum	Aug 31st, 2007 06:39:20 PM
someone had to say it
I dont know how this got to be about Transformers by Phategod2	Aug 31st, 2007 06:42:13 PM
BUt I just wanted to add tha movie was a Sci-fi Abortion and Ive yet to hear a actual VALID reason why people think it was a good movie.
This film was doomed when by thefutureoffilm	Aug 31st, 2007 06:44:28 PM
it said "A Film by Rob Zombie"
Danielle Harris by Super Rabbi	Aug 31st, 2007 06:56:25 PM
The movie was shitty, but I think that's pretty much conveyed here. I hope Danielle Harris gets better roles in better movies after this. She's smokin!
Memories... by neutrino	Aug 31st, 2007 06:58:10 PM
could you at least refrain from telling others why they disliked the movie and let their opinions speak for themselves. I didn't hate this film because it's supposedly cool - or 'geek dogma' - to bash Rob.I didn't hate this film simply because it's a remake. I didn't hate this film because I am such a fan of the original that I feel anyone who attempts to redo or "reimagine" it deserves an auto-da-fe in the town square. Put simply, I hated this film for one reason and one reason only: IT'S A BAD MOVIE. I don't know how much more clearly I can say it. All the elements that combine to make a good film are missing from this pile of festering dung. Writing? Terrible. Cinematography? Spastic. Characterization? Bad to nonexistent. Suspense/tension? Completely absent. Acting? Horrid. Dialogue? A fork on a blackboard would be more pleasant to the ears. As for Zombie "not playing it safe" and "taking chances" - Bullshit. This movie is as predictable and dull as they come. So please stop accusing everyone who dislikes this film to be guilty of groupthink. If you want a true example of groupthink, why don't you hop on over to Zombie's Myspace page (aka Simpering Fanboy Central.) P.S. Sorry for my longwindedness, but I had to vent a little.
sounds just as bad as by Geek Sodomizer	Aug 31st, 2007 07:12:10 PM
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning or whatever that fucking abortion of a movie was called. Same deal with that movie, Leatherface and all his pals slaughter EVERYONE in the movie. Sorry I don't see horror movies to root for evil psychopaths to win in the end.
Zombie just took this too seriously by Blue Meanie 1138	Aug 31st, 2007 07:15:39 PM
I mean, really...what next? A remake of JAWS from the shark's POV? The original HALLOWEEN was a great piece of pop filmmaking...a perfectly calculated, tight little work that didn't waste a breath on anything unnecessary. And in the end, you can see the fun everyone was having with it. But over the years, geeks have turned it into some kind of holy relic of horror, and from all evidence of early word of mouth, it seems like Zombie has fallen into that trap. Instead of a good scary time, he put MM on the couch. What good is a little scare if you can't have a few laughs, too?
Michael Myers is HUGE SCARY BAD ASS in this by zooch	Aug 31st, 2007 07:29:19 PM
Just saw it. Not since the first film, have I seen a Michael Myers as threatening as he is in Rob Zombie's Halloween. The Michael Myers in this is scary and deadlier than ever. I was first surprised by the beginning, the kid reminded me of Damien from the OMEN. And once he grows up and puts that mask on, Michael Myers was back! This film FEELS like the 1970's original at times and other times it remains very much a Rob Zombie film. The whole thing felt very realistic. Well done Rob.
Moriarty is dead wrong...and so was I by WeinerPenis	Aug 31st, 2007 07:29:47 PM
I earlier said that anyone who wanted to see this movie was retarded. I was of course just talking shit, but I really did think it was absurd that this movie was being made. So I admit it. I watched the screener. (by the way, after I watched it, I considered writing a review and saying I had watched a 'screening' of it, just like the scumbag who started backpedaling when he got caught.) And you know what? None of you people got this movie. It's actually pretty good. And I've never even seen these other Zombie movies, and I certainly don't give a fuck about a guy that's as big a douche as Zombie. But this movie was actually well done and smartly decided, at least the screener version. Perfect example of y'all not getting it: the "Love Hurts" cue. Mori says it comes off funny even though it is "really, really" not supposed to. Maybe Mori's ham-fisted sensibilities were looking for more notification that it was in fact a small joke, and not either a "huge bold joke" or a "nn-joke gone horribly awry." It was just a little funny moment. It's not there to make you sniffle and go "Poor kid, that sucks!" and it's not there to make you laugh and howl, but it is one of those "That's funny...and fucked up....but more funny" moments. In fact, it is just like....every other time Love Hurts is used as a cue. And that's why it is great! It's maudlin, but absurd, and that does bring an element of humor that you have to truly have hate in your heart to believe is not intentional. SPOILERThe fucking kid is sitting there dressed like a clown in the gayest suit ever, this little angry kid who is way too old for this shit who is washing blood off his knives as his sister taunts a pre-pubescent saying he is stroking off, is now sitting there in this totally queer, totally hilarious clown outfit, just sitting there like the sad clown paintings. That overblown song comes on, and the little bastard doesn't freak out, he just decides that he can take all these pieces of shit out the same way he killed the animals and the bully at school (which, come on, was also pretty fun and creepy...who hasn't wanted to find the school asshole after school and beat him with a stick, if perhaps not to death?) I'll flat out guarantee you that if Rob Zombie were reading this right now, he would agree with me that you didn't get the humor. He would say, "You fucking nerds need to lighten up. Halloween is a great movie, but I wanted to explore the idea in a different way." And he did, and he actually made a good movie, which I was the last person to expect. I talked much shit about it on these boards, but color me surprised. I mean, how many times do you pussies say "He's not a character...he's the bogeyman..."? Well, you can't go anywhere with that. Even seeing the movie a third or fourth time, Michael isn't nearly what he was the first time. You have to rely on sense memory to make him scary again. It's just like with Jason. It's creepy one time, Mori is right about that. Same with Frankenstein. Frankenstein used to be scary, now he's "sympathetic". So what do you do to make what's old new again? You riff. And that's all this movie is. It's Zombie riffing on a classic song that is in fact SO classic that people don't still get a thrill out of it, even if they have a lot of respect and affection for it, no pun intended. Rather than trying to write his own ripoff (for instance Mori, you gotta admit that almost all of the stories of yours we know of publicly at least are essentially your take on a well-worn idea given some geek twist, which is usually just another well-worn idea from another genre), he just decides to see what he can do with an existing, limp and watered down mythology, see if he can make it fucked up again. I think he succeeded to some degree, I really do. Now where I do agree is about Laurie. What...the...fuck? She is like any other character in any other movie here. And I don't get that. That does undermine the movie in a big way and it took me out of the first hour, which I enjoyed (by the way, I don't agree with Quint that McDowell was bad at all, I thought he was fun in that overacting way that the incredibly corny and not-believable but still awesome Donald Pleasance was. He had that "Stunned, disgusted, and fascinated" look completely down.) I swear to you, I hate sitting here and being the dipshit who thinks the new shitty Halloween movie was pretty good. But seriously, it was. It actually was a kick to see Michael as an adult and picture that little cute bastard whose indifference masked a quiet mounting rage. I loved seeing young Michael waiting for the bully behind trees in the woods, and then slowly walking towards him the way a kid would do, and realizing that's just what "the bogeyman' does. Only here it makes sense and is funny. Was it better when it made no sense? Probably, everything usually is. But the way he made sense out of it also was cool in its own way. And I like the idea that, just like the first pussy you ever clumsily dammed with your finger, he got a little sampling of this incredibly visceral sensation which he could never have anticipated, and that from that point on he bored by an already thankless life and only wants to get back to that moment in the woods where he was in control, he made the rules, and he felt a thrill that was unlike anything most human beings ever experience. Maybe the film edit really is that much worse. I grant you that. But to me it seems like essentially the same film and as someone who doesn't give two balls about Rob Zombie and someone who still watches the original every Christmas eve (long story), I actually found a lot to enjoy about this movie, and the people who hate it so much all have clearly not given it a fair shake. I mean...love hurts is not supposed to be funny? That says it all to me. Watch it again, pause it until you get what is funny about that, and then resume watching, and see if the movie doesn't click with you on second viewing.
"The version we watched was dated just three weeks ago" by jfp2007	Aug 31st, 2007 07:37:47 PM
Bullshit. The leaked workprint is dated May 2007. If he had a "final cut" that was 3 weeks old, it would not have had the rape scene, the ending he described, and it would have had more deaths and other changes. Fairline is lying to save some face.
LOL by phoenixmagi	Aug 31st, 2007 07:51:44 PM
Ha ha. hey everyone ithe english film stydent is back on here to show us how woth his training this is a good movie even though he hasn't seen it yet. LOL! hey how you liking all the bad reviews from the associated press fuck head? you are like the duoche bag from good will hunting who tries to show off his knowledge in the bar to but guess what the movie sucks, how do you like them apples?
Michael's super sonar sense... by jfp2007	Aug 31st, 2007 07:53:06 PM
He didn't just find her. He found here the same way he did in the original. She came to the old Myer's home and he saw her. When she put the envelope in the mailbox, he picked it up and read the name on it and got the address. He followed her around after that you blind as hell haters.
JFP... by TheRealMoriarty	Aug 31st, 2007 08:02:11 PM
... do you understand why that makes no sense? His baby sister's name was "Boo." That's how he knew her. Why would he see an 18-year-old named Laurie Strode and read the address on the envelope and think, "Okay, then, there's my baby sister." As Dourif makes clear in dialogue, it was a secret that she was adopted. No one knew who she was, so unless Michael's mutant ability is smelling his family members or tracking them by magic, it doesn't work.
If I never saw my baby sister before in my life by zooch	Aug 31st, 2007 08:13:49 PM
I could still recognize someone that looks just like me. I know, cause I had a illegitmate sister!
John Carpenter's got jokes by Series7	Aug 31st, 2007 08:16:00 PM
I think John Carpenter is letting all of his films be remade so people can look back and buy his newly restored dvd re releases and realize how much better his versions were. I think he is purposely making sure that the remakes are bad so he looks so much better. I am waiting to find out who is going to destroy the remake of a remake with The Thing, why not just sign on Uwe Boll Movement so at least we know its a joke.
I never expected gold from this... by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 08:19:12 PM
but I certainly didn't expect to see almost the entire fuckin' Firefly family show up in some incarnation or another, spoutin' off very similar sounding shit. Once I heard about this showing the "WHY" for Michael Myers being so evil my hopes started to erode. Once the previews ended (with The Mist trailer being very, very kickass) we get what seems like almost an hour of "Young Michael"! The first time we actually see the Shat mask is on "lil Mikey" and I fuckin' almost shit myself, it was like Rob Zombie thought it would be a good idea to combine Michael Myers with an Ewok suffering from a glandular problem! I pause to collect my thoughts. I take a sip of herbal tea. I resume my rant. I hated the kid. Absolutely hated the kid. The only other child actor that has irked me more in a horror film is the frickin' little bucktoothed monstrosity they got to play Danny Torrance in The Shining remake. I think Zombie just had open casting calls and was looking for a slightly beefy kid, with weird eyes and facial features. No acting skills necessary. Note to zombie, that whole "torture porn" terminology, they're not, you know, actually talking about porn. It was so damn distracting to see everybody from Zombie's two previous films show up to spout of 5 or 6 lines and then disappear (or die suddenly). I loved House of 1,000 Corpses and I loved Devil's Rejects. They are both so over the top and contagiously insane that it made me happy to hear of a new film from Rob Zombie, yes, even if it was Halloween. I just can't shake the feelin' that this was a deal maker for Zombie. The Weinstein Bros. said "Look man, we dig your shit and QT loves it so we're willing to front you some money for future projects. You just, you know, gotta do us a favor foist (insert bad Joe Pesci impersonation here). What was that favor you ask? Well it was to make a sure thing (at least in terms of initial curiosity seekers making a sizeable opening weekend box office) by "re-imagining" a beloved Horror franchise. Rob Zombie sold out. Period. Which is fine if it gives you creative freedom in the future. Just fuckin' you know, fess the fuck up about it. This is America. In order to make it in business you sell out or you get out. I really hope we get to see some more Rob Zombie movies in the future, minus Sid Haig, Bill Moseley, and Sherri Moon Zombie. You can do it Rob. Hire a casting director just don't have a weekend BBQ with your pals and suggest an upcoming film project. Funny thing is, I wasn't this pissed off about this movie right after I saw it. I've had to think about it. Now there are some good points to this movie and I might discuss 'em later (ie. rant some more). But for right now just know this, the Halloween movie you grew up with and loved. The one made by that John Carpenter fella. Well it's bees knees compared to this version. It's classic. I would never ever consider Rob Zombie's take anywhere close to classic status. Merely watchable as a comparisson piece maybe. But I do think House of 1,000 Corpses and Devil's Rejects are both minor classics in their own rights. Different things where nothing was sacred. It's like Rob Zombie just took a massive dump on the Horror film altar, but first he had to desecrate a couple dozen small mammal carcasses to get all pumped for the big squeeze. If you liked or loved John Carpenter's flick you are going to hate this movie. Or maybe not. Ponder that ponderers.
I never expected gold from this... by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 08:19:13 PM
but I certainly didn't expect to see almost the entire fuckin' Firefly family show up in some incarnation or another, spoutin' off very similar sounding shit. Once I heard about this showing the "WHY" for Michael Myers being so evil my hopes started to erode. Once the previews ended (with The Mist trailer being very, very kickass) we get what seems like almost an hour of "Young Michael"! The first time we actually see the Shat mask is on "lil Mikey" and I fuckin' almost shit myself, it was like Rob Zombie thought it would be a good idea to combine Michael Myers with an Ewok suffering from a glandular problem! I pause to collect my thoughts. I take a sip of herbal tea. I resume my rant. I hated the kid. Absolutely hated the kid. The only other child actor that has irked me more in a horror film is the frickin' little bucktoothed monstrosity they got to play Danny Torrance in The Shining remake. I think Zombie just had open casting calls and was looking for a slightly beefy kid, with weird eyes and facial features. No acting skills necessary. Note to zombie, that whole "torture porn" terminology, they're not, you know, actually talking about porn. It was so damn distracting to see everybody from Zombie's two previous films show up to spout of 5 or 6 lines and then disappear (or die suddenly). I loved House of 1,000 Corpses and I loved Devil's Rejects. They are both so over the top and contagiously insane that it made me happy to hear of a new film from Rob Zombie, yes, even if it was Halloween. I just can't shake the feelin' that this was a deal maker for Zombie. The Weinstein Bros. said "Look man, we dig your shit and QT loves it so we're willing to front you some money for future projects. You just, you know, gotta do us a favor foist (insert bad Joe Pesci impersonation here). What was that favor you ask? Well it was to make a sure thing (at least in terms of initial curiosity seekers making a sizeable opening weekend box office) by "re-imagining" a beloved Horror franchise. Rob Zombie sold out. Period. Which is fine if it gives you creative freedom in the future. Just fuckin' you know, fess the fuck up about it. This is America. In order to make it in business you sell out or you get out. I really hope we get to see some more Rob Zombie movies in the future, minus Sid Haig, Bill Moseley, and Sherri Moon Zombie. You can do it Rob. Hire a casting director just don't have a weekend BBQ with your pals and suggest an upcoming film project. Funny thing is, I wasn't this pissed off about this movie right after I saw it. I've had to think about it. Now there are some good points to this movie and I might discuss 'em later (ie. rant some more). But for right now just know this, the Halloween movie you grew up with and loved. The one made by that John Carpenter fella. Well it's bees knees compared to this version. It's classic. I would never ever consider Rob Zombie's take anywhere close to classic status. Merely watchable as a comparisson piece maybe. But I do think House of 1,000 Corpses and Devil's Rejects are both minor classics in their own rights. Different things where nothing was sacred. It's like Rob Zombie just took a massive dump on the Horror film altar, but first he had to desecrate a couple dozen small mammal carcasses to get all pumped for the big squeeze. If you liked or loved John Carpenter's flick you are going to hate this movie. Or maybe not. Ponder that ponderers.
stupid double posts by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 08:20:15 PM
stupid mouse savaged by lil' Michael Myers.
This review is 100% accurate. by El Scorcho	Aug 31st, 2007 08:39:11 PM
I couldn't agree more with Mori. What a fucking waste of film.
jfp2007 by originalskoobx	Aug 31st, 2007 08:40:40 PM
Thank you. For as smart ass as most readers here are, I was surprised no one got that. I loved this movie. I think it is one of the best horror movies I have seen in at least 5 years. Hostel? Not even close. Saw. Yeah, it was a neat idea, but it does not hold up with repeated viewings. I think Zombie nailed it here. He reimagined it. He told the same story, but from a different POV. Remember that game you played as kids in school. The one where the teacher whispers something in one kids ear, and they pass it on, and eventually the "secret" is all fucked up and different? Zombie tells a story here that has been told before. It is different than the original. Yet it stands on its own two feet. Watch the news in any city. Any big event is told over and over on each network. Essentially the story is the same, but each network has its own spin on the story. Zombie spun his story on Michael Myers, and I for one dug it.
Oh, and this film is humorless. by El Scorcho	Aug 31st, 2007 08:40:48 PM
Great horror films lean more on the side of satire. This film was unpleasant and depressing as all hell, and I'm no prude.
Saw and Hostel were better than this shit for 1 reason. by El Scorcho	Aug 31st, 2007 08:41:51 PM
They didn't take an iconic character and rape it for monetary gain.
i think this is all being taken way too seriously by slappy jones	Aug 31st, 2007 08:43:40 PM
the film is great fun. I had a great time with it and will see it again. I think some people are missing a lot of the humour because I found parts of it hilarious and I didn't think it was unintentional. I really hope this makes a killing just to shut all you fuckers up.....but it won't.
I love that him rexognizing her scent is way absurd... by WeinerPenis	Aug 31st, 2007 08:52:05 PM
...and yet you are the people bitching that the film over-explains too much. I love the idea that this guy who doesn't use his other senses all that often has a retardedly good sense of smell and that he just knows this is her. That's creepy. If you never had seen the original, that would be really creepy, like he can smell her quim on the envelope. All the stuff about masks was gone into in great detail, but I thought it worked. It was tough not to laugh because of all the take a shit mask jokes, but that is hardly his fault. I can see how, in the context of the movie, that kind of stuff might have been creepy. By the way, the whole argument that he is just the bogeyman doesn't stack up to why exactly then he would wear a william shatner mask painted white. It never made any sense. And the original is genius in that it never relieves the tension by explaining stuff like that. But once you know that stuff, you can never go the Carpenter route again. Once you have seen michael Myers through culture and know he is in the movie from the poster, the mask is going to seem as stupid as it has in the other sequels unless you give everyone something to hold on to and say "Okay, that's why he wears it." Could you accept no explanation? Sure, but it wouldn't be "better", not anymore. The mystery thing has been done, and this is more of the heeby jeevy kind of thing. Those of you defending this against the original miss the point, and I don't mean that as if you weren't ready to like this movie. Its just that you forget that this movie needs to essentially take an unscary movie villain that stucks now and find a way to make us feel creeped out by him again. Cruising around and killing with two sentences of backstory just wouldn't cut it nowaways, we know the story and the iconography too well.
Further proof that Zombie does NOT get it. by MaryTylerMorbid	Aug 31st, 2007 08:52:23 PM
While there are numerous problems with Zombie's film, the main problem is the writing: it stinks. The guy couldn't write his way out of a paper bag. That's not to say that the filmmaking was any good - the movie was horribly lit and was completely devoid of suspense. Whenever anything got violent, suddenly the movie plunged into the Blair Witch Project: shaky, jolting camera - a crystal clear sign that the director hasn't a clue what he's doing. And what's with all the gore all these reviewers who saw the early screenings were talking about? Bloodshed was nil, at best. Other than the bad Giannetto De Rossi rip-off throat-slashing, the gore was at a premium. I had very low expectations for this movie, and I think Rob Zombie is a hack, both as a "filmmaker" and a "musician," but I'm a poverty-stricken bitch who actually dropped money on this thing and I wanted it to be, at the very least, enjoyable - but the simple fact of the matter was that it sucked cold and hard. And what was up with the ending? The final 15 minutes were nothing more than Halloween: Resurrection, sans Buster Rhymes. And the finale? An almost shot-for-shot retread of "Final Exam" -- which, I guess is kind of cool - because "Final Exam" rules your ass!!!! Bottom line: I would have asked for my money back if it wasn't for Danielle Harris and her boobs. Yeah, I got a dyke crush on Danielle. And that Nazareth "Love Hurts" montage with little Mikey sitting on the front steps -- COME ON!! I'm actually happy Rob Zombie made this movie - because now his career is officially OVER! And he should go ahead and blow his brains out, too.
Also, anyone notices Biff's house was the Myters house? by WeinerPenis	Aug 31st, 2007 08:54:06 PM
Biff's grandma's house from BTTF 2, the one Marty spies on. I've watched that movie way too many times. I heard once that it's the same neighborhood as Lorraine's house which is also right up the street from the Teen Wolf house. Or something.
El Scorcho by originalskoobx	Aug 31st, 2007 09:01:57 PM
I would agree with you if this was a shot for shot remake. It is not. Not even close. If this would have been a sequel, I suppose it would have been ok to "rape" an iconic character.
shit seriously sucked. by Bulldoggie	Aug 31st, 2007 09:04:02 PM
how does shit like this get made? I took a player pass on hostel2 & Saw whatever, but saw this? The first 10 minutes were good/watchable and thats all I got to say. I'm pretty bummed on this film and Quint was right all along. I dont understand how shit like this gets made. Harry, any thoughts?
If I wanted a True Crime film by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 09:11:45 PM
I'd have re-watched Zodiac. Yeah, it's creepy as hell that there are people out there that do what Mikey Myers does in this movie. I'm freaked out by the possibility that those people are walking amongst us. But that's not what I was hoping for in a Halloween film. I don't want to know that he's just like us. I want to believe Donald Pleasance's Dr. Loomis when he gives his empassioned speech about Michael Myers as being darkness incarnate. I want to have that suspicion that Michael Myers is, to quote Rob Zombie, "More Human Than Human". Zombie's Halloween is Psycho on crack wrapped up in a crystal-meth tortilla, drenched in Wild Turkey salsa. It feels like a conglomeration of as much fucked up shit that could happen to a kid as humanly possible. In essence, when you boil it down to it's gristle, Rob Zombie has turned Michael Myers into nothing more than a reaction. The Flight or Fight response gone into overdrive. I'm having a hard time not comparing RZ's Hallowen to JC's Halloween and each time I do the RZ version just doesn't cut it. See, I know that every year, when Halloween time rolls around, that I want to watch not just John Carpenter's theatrical cut of Halloween, but the extended tv cut as well. I get excited about revisiting the movie. It makes me feel nostalgic (and even somewhat disturbed) by the thought of Jamie Lee Curtis starting to get paranoid that somebody is following her. I can still get into the movie. It somehow still affects me. I just feel almost heartbroken by RZ's version.
will def. skip this one. by TomBodet	Aug 31st, 2007 09:14:27 PM
first halloween is a classic, this one sounds like shit and prob. is.
Rob Zombie may be the bravest filmmaker of 2007. by LoneGun	Aug 31st, 2007 09:51:19 PM
The massive vitriol to which he has exposed himself, in remaking a horror classic that is so beloved as HALLOWEEN, is proof enough. It's clearly not irreverence that drove him to do it, as this new version shows ample respect for the original. However, this is definitely HIS take on HALLOWEEN, and it works wonderfully. He does not "over-explain" anything. He simply tells the story his way, and that includes a creepy, fiendishly fascinating foray into Michael Myer's childhood. I loved every minute of it. Scary as hell.
Brilliant review by sevadro	Aug 31st, 2007 09:53:51 PM
However, you forgot to discuss Malcolm McDowell's painfully shitty performance.
Lonegun by originalskoobx	Aug 31st, 2007 09:57:36 PM
I finally see some of the non haters coming on board. I still stand by this being a great movie. In fact, as I said earlier, it is one of the best horror movies in a while. What else have we had spoon fed to us over the past decade. Lots of PG-13 bullshit. This movie was raw and brutal. It is pure entertainment, and it will be one of those great horror films that gets better with age. This film will age well. I also feel that this film will develop a cult following, and not just Zombie fanatics.
Jihadists are scarier by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 10:06:37 PM
but I admit that Tyler Mane's Michael Myers is some of the most brutal violence in a "mainstream" Horror film that I've seen in a long time. I just don't dig on this version too much. If it's somehow still in theaters around Halloween time I might give it another whirl (perhaps with alcohol in my system) to see if I can not cringe, once, during the opening 20 minutes. Cringes induced from dialogue, not violence.
zombie, you ignorant slut... by TORTURE PWN1	Aug 31st, 2007 10:07:21 PM
If you you don't want your movie to be compared to the original- don't do a fucking remake! It's that damn simple.
originalskoobx, only time will tell... by LoneGun	Aug 31st, 2007 10:08:10 PM
...but I, too, think that this film will outlive its critics. I think the cinema is a more interesting place with Rob Zombie in it. And I think there is room in the world for his version of HALLOWEEN.
Maybe Im in the minority Moriarity but... by TheRealSeveren	Aug 31st, 2007 10:12:27 PM
Rob's Halloween was pretty inspired I felt. You stated that even the Strodes dont know about Laurie's true identity so maybe you missed the quick scene where Brackett tells Loomis that Mr. Strode adopted her after Brackett sheltered her away after the original murders. if Brackett knew her identity its fair to assume Strode did. This is irrelevant though and so is Michael's uncanny ability to track down his sister. Maybe the flick needed a couple of establishing shots or setups but I personally am annoyed at those types of scenes because they hurt momentum. I can fill in the blanks as to how he got to the truck stop or if he knew about Laurie somehow. Its a horror movie! It doesnt have to make perfect logical sense! Also, what is all the complaining about lack of character development? Like the original was fucking Hamlet or something! What? Did Annie not talk on the phone as much as you would have liked? Is that what you call character development? Besides, isnt it possible that a film can still be good and of a certain quality without fleshing out ALL of the characters? Youre right, it is all about Michael in this film instead of the holy trinity that Carpenter set up. Ive seen the workprint and the theatrical and I am realizing more and more how much I enjoyed both of them. The reason there is so much negativity towards prequels and remakes is that most of them SUCK! This one doesnt and it certainly restores Myers once again to iconic status. Some of the shots of him in this flick are reason enough to see this. Im just not seeing what alot of you are complaining about. I think we can all agree that its the best one since I and II although I have a soft spot for part 4... Give Zombie some credit will ya?! By the way, I respect all of you.
No more remakes by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 10:12:49 PM
All movies should be pitched as remakes though. It's not like producers ever research that shit. Just try to sell your movie as a re-imagining of some Polish drama that won some international awards. Then make a really brutal Horror film. Then you could be like a losing political candidate and blame it on the Poles.
Chalk me up for one who liked it. by fish tacos	Aug 31st, 2007 10:14:10 PM
I understand the harsh criticism it's getting, but I can't help but be won over by it. It's harrowing and bleak, the dialogue was rough at times, but I was convinced by it. Go see it with an open mind and a willingness to go along with some of the quirks and bad dialogue.
The Fly is a fantastic remake... by DanielKurland	Aug 31st, 2007 10:15:47 PM
Cape Fear was mentioned, and I agree. There's also another really good horror remake, like The Fly, but for the life of me, I cannot remember which one I'm thinking of.
thank you mori by blonde redhead	Aug 31st, 2007 10:17:32 PM
i don't always agree with your reviews but this movie sucked desperately. enough with RZ's fascination with manson, rednecks, and his notion of what their shitty dialogue should sound like. like, man, their CRAZY FUCKING CHATTER, MOTHERFUCKERS, YOU COCKBLOCKED MY MOTHER YOU PUSSY-EATING etc. whatever yawn yawn yawn. terrible, terrible film. and i liked devil's rejects.
"cinema is a more intresting place with (Zombie) in it" by Bulldoggie	Aug 31st, 2007 10:17:46 PM
I agree lonegun. I actually liked the white trash Zombie mark on this film, I hated the second half though. I do feel Zombie has promise and look forward to his efforts outside of this genre.
"cinema is a more intresting place with (Zombie) in it" by Bulldoggie	Aug 31st, 2007 10:17:47 PM
I agree lonegun. I actually liked the white trash Zombie mark on this film, I hated the second half though. I do feel Zombie has promise and look forward to his efforts outside of this genre.
Can they make an Original and call it a Remake? by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 10:19:05 PM
Yeah, uh, we did this before. I swear. Now just sign the check.
The fuck? by CerebralAssassin	Aug 31st, 2007 10:20:10 PM
"they take all that knowledge of what leads to broken people and what they want and need and crave and they pour it into these disturbing underground videos that can only be described as art." Underground horror is art? No-budget videotape rape/torture movies? Perhaps MOMA will create a video installation for an exhibition next spring......
Spikey by Charlie Murphy	Aug 31st, 2007 10:21:50 PM
you're so absolutely fucking right. but it seems like everything that can be done with horror has been done. okay, here's some more blood and gore and people go see it. there's nothing left. comedy has been the same way. we could only hear the same PG-13 dick jokes so many times before someone finally said enough is enough. shit, it's taken like fifteen years for an R rated comedy to take off like "40 year old virgon" or "superbad" did, and now hopefully we'll see less "epic movie"s or "50 first dates" or "little man"s and more similarily themed R rated comedy powerhouses because it's being fucking proven that people want to see them. maybe we'll have to suffer through a few more years of japanese horror knock offs before writers and studio execs realize: a) PG-13 ain't scaring anybody, b) it takes a little more creativity than a couple buckets of guts to make a goddamn horror movie and c) the oldies are goodies for a fucking reason. who will be horror's judd apatow? i know joss whedon has a horror flick in the works, and this "hatchet" sounds promising, if of course, anybody goes to see it. i've lost sight of my point... what was it again...? hmmm... fuck
Memories of Murder... by pdennett316	Aug 31st, 2007 10:26:50 PM
Who are you to tell people that the reasons they dislike a film are flawed? People like what they like for the reasons they like it, you cannot come barging in proclaiming a person's OPINION to be wrong. 'Well the reasons were illogical...' What has logic got to do with it? Since when are people's likes and dislikes based on logical progression? Obviously not ALL remakes are shit, just the vast majority that are being released so far this century. That sticks with people when yet another remake is released and they say "Remakes suck". That is not meant as some sweeping blanket statement, but a reflection of the times. If we had to list the exceptions to every rule after we reference it, talkback's would be unreadable. That doesn't make a person's assertation that remakes suck wrong, it's merely a reflection of the state of cinema at the moment. Also, do you not think that if RZ had simply replaced the main character with one of his own creation, all of this shit could have been avoided? Why use the Halloween name and characters at all when the tone is going to deviate so wildly? Answer, to rake in some extra cash on the name value. It's extremely cynical, and probably why this movie has attracted so much ill-feeling. If it was his own character, Zombie may well have been praised for this flick. As it is, people have seen through the cynical bullshit exercise that it is.
i yearn for scares without gore and overkill. by future help	Aug 31st, 2007 10:29:43 PM
classic atmosphere mixed with great tension and build. LIKE: Don't Look Now or The Tenant or Rosemary's Baby or Invasion of the Body Snatchers (70's v.). IT has been a long while.
I for one liked the movie with all the bitches in the by Bulldoggie	Aug 31st, 2007 10:30:34 PM
hole fighting for their lives aganst the Golum creatures. That got zero love, that Korean mess got mad love and, IMO, sucked ass. Zombie's seriously getting shit because he shows potential and for whatever reason that pisses people off. Sort of.
and yes, THE FLY and the THING are the 2 best remakes. by future help	Aug 31st, 2007 10:31:16 PM
true.
The Blob (1988) remake was great by Osmosis Jones	Aug 31st, 2007 10:32:18 PM
.
Shawnee Smith was HOTTT in the '88 Blob by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 10:34:58 PM
and it was pretty fuckin' gory. I love that movie, Kevin Dillon mullet and all.
Scarface was the best remake, so give by Bulldoggie	Aug 31st, 2007 10:35:47 PM
Zombie something else to work with, outside of the genre. I didnt mind the white trash re-telling and thought that alot of young people do talk that way- no doubt, everything else was pretty lame. As other posters have mentioned, it's not really Zombies fault this film was made the way it was. I mean really, if it wasnt Zombie it would have been an equal or lesser hack. I'm giving him the benifit of the doubt and saying "50/50"
ADMIT IT, PEOPLE. YOU LOVE IT. MORIARTY WAS WRONG. by TheDohDoh	Aug 31st, 2007 10:40:09 PM
That is all. This ain't Transformers, it's Halloween. I don't remember any Talkbacks being this crazy for another Halloween movie. It did what it was supposed to do and more. It's resurrected Michael Myers and put him ahead of Freddy and Jason.
Ahead of Freddy and Jason? by SoylentMean	Aug 31st, 2007 10:44:15 PM
How is that possible? Rob Zombie removed the very notion of anything even remotely supernatural going on with Michael Myers. Last time I checked both Freddy and Jason were a lot closer to unstoppable than "that crazy Myers boy who went all crazy".
DohDoh just said "Freddy & Jason head" by Bulldoggie

Talkbacks

Moriarty Pulls A Knife On Rob Zombie’s HALLOWEEN And Talks About HATCHET And POUGHKEEPSIE And S&MAN And More!