the scream said it nicely at 09:02:13 PM

Messi like Jesu too. more tightness

Believe it or not, I actually do have a life and other stuff to do but when something like this comes around you expect more and somehow get less.

How hard is it to update an iconic design but to still maintain the elements that made said design iconic? How hard is it to give the design the character that helped to make it iconic? Why not cast the person who breathed life into the character and as such took it over the top to make it an iconic character? I've been wondering this for months, especially when I see other old stuff being updated and yet retaining that which people liked.

None of that is here in Transformers. The one thing all these reviews share is that the FX are great. They fuckin' better be. ILM set the standard for Christ sake so there's no debating how good the FX are, hell I would think you could cut out the rest of the film and just have the FX and no one would miss it. But for me that's just not enough.

I expect good plot, character development, and action, as well as great FX to make a movie like this totally successful. So far there has only been FX work that stands out but everything else is sorely lacking. I'm sorry, I'm just not the kind of guy to waste an hours pay on something that doesn't give back to me in the way put out. I don't just want to see total fucking destruction or robots kicking each other's ass. I want to see what motivates the robots to be how they are and why they fight. I want to see each robot's unique personality played out on screen as opposed to mute filler to make FX geeks go OOH and AHH. Yeah people think someone like me will see this the first day, but in actuality I'm gonna miss the theatrical run as well as the release on DVD. I expect more from my movies and so far the films released this summer have not been anything to write home about. Lame.

DIE, AUTOBOTS!!!

Why throw away your life so recklessly?

Decepticons, ATTACK!!!

Alas, none of that is heard here......

I will be the new leader of the Decepticons

PATHETIC FOOLS!!! THERE'S NO ESCAPE!!!!

I can understand why they couldn't cast the voice actor on account he died years ago, but still, there were MANY missed opportunities to bring Starscream's character to this film. That's just fucked up screenwriting and filmmaking.

My buddy Yack would never sign off the way he did with his name in parentheses. He's a virtual staple of AICN Talkbacks. Please cross-check the originating e-mail address from that reviewer and confirm it with the address under Yack's login name. I'll bet they're not the same. And if you trace the IP address I'll bet it leads you to Shia LeBeouf's parents' house.

Indignant? Sure. I get indigent when assholes assume they know me or when assholes disrespect a property that deserves better realization. That’s why i responded to you since you found it in your interests to take a proverbial stab at me when I was merely responding to messi and YackBacker. Perfectly fine. I just loathe those you say “see you in line” or “you’ll be the first one in line at the midnight showing” or someother such nonsense. What the fuck is that? Well, you baited and I stupidly took it. Nice.

I don’t consider posting here and sharing opinions a waste of time. I mentioned it was one of my many hobbies. Matter of fact, my slow response time was due to me spending time with my daughter and thusly putting her down to sleep. I have moved on for the most part (concerning this film as I have with other poor comic adaptations). I just wanted to thank messi and Yack for their reviews.

Odd to you? Ok, it’s odd to you. I have enjoyed The Transformers for over two decades now (and I saw a lot more potential with the property than what was realized) and film for even longer. I like to talk/type about it. That’s the point of this site.

Now look at you...tearing down your fellow Talkbackers for enjoying the film. You've even begun to call your former hater-buddies PLANTS!!! Talk about your basic irony. (and everything comedic that entails). Unbelievable.

I've seen some pathetic stuff said in Talkback regarding this film. But you guys take the fucking cake. Congratulations!

Mr. Nice Gauis
You have stuck to your guns through this whole thing and that shows guts. Your condescending attitude has always been off putting but it worked.

BadMrWonka
I think your review was well rounded and interesting. Seemed very real and even-handed.

I think I am going to wait to see this movie for free somehow. Stick to my original sentiment about Don murphy's attitude and Bay's disregard for the fans.

Yeah, definitely more Transformers reviews than I could handle. Overkill much? Nah.

I will eventually see it but definately not on opening day like you said. Should I be expecting a check or money order for $1000.00 soon...

Through your words I was worried you were having an aneurysm. I hope you're okay!

You can't compare Godzilla or the GINO aspect because Godzilla isn't as important to me as Transformers and to many other people. Even with the problems it was a great experience and I am taking my nephews to see it because I think they should, I strayed them away from FF2 and another has never been to a movie theatre and Transformers is worthy of being the first movie you ever see in a theatre.

there is one transformer who changes his alt mode to suit the situation. Obviously for story reasons but there is no need for any of them to be anything but what they are and just picking whatever was next to them. Optimus, Megatron, ratchet, jazz all pick the first cars they see. I mean seriously, let's not overanalyze this.

http://www.buzznet.com/groups/ stopsectorseven/video/12271761 /

so read the reviews, and mine in particular, and ask me some questions...I'm here for you nerds...

I won't spoil the movie, but god damn, I will tell it like it is!

I don't think just 2 sequels but an evangelion movie and a Voltron movie will be fast tracked soon. No I am not satisfied with that, but it doesn't take away from the movie, it isn't however fucked up to the point where they can't correct this in the future(venom is fucked, good luck getting a good symbiote story or venom in the future), which is lucky but they really should have gone with it and this will be the biggest criticism it will face, when something bad story wise happens then it really shows.

If Frenzy looked better I would welcome him, because what he does in the film is cool but he doesn't look cool, he looks like shit. If he looked like more like the real Frenzy and said something to Shia when he has him "first we crack the shell, then we crack the nuts inside". Would have been god. Skorponock has a great scene but I'd prefer they bring in thundercracker and skywarp as starscream's muscle.

Makes PERFECT SENSE! Towards the end when the Allspark is turning all the earth items alive, it is because all the items are based on reversed engineered Megatron technology that they are able to be brought to life by the Allspark.

Did I like it? Was my fear misplaced? Do I agree with Yackbacker as usual? Will I eat crow? Do you even care?

The answer to all of these questions is an emphatic NO!

I've been debating whether or not to write a review of this... film?... clusterf*ck? I'm not sure what you would call this other than a tremendously missed opportunity.

TINO, as this should officially be called, is for all intents and purposes this years US version of Godzilla.

I'm not going to go into it since I'm really getting sick of AICN and their bullshit, but for me everything I feared is there. Even with expectations that this film would be utter ASS, I still cringed when everything that could have been handled wrong was handled wrong.

I even knew going in that Bay and his team have done nothing but lie to fans about production choices because he and his team don't give two shits about the fans and that is so very evident in each moment of this series of explosions.

I just don't know what to say other than I'm glad it wasn't my money that was spent on this flaming turd and I'm even more happy that the press passes my friend was given were free so that he didn't have to waste his money on this pile either.

To put it simply there were times that this was so busy and so hard to watch that I personally gave up trying to figure out what the hell was happening in that last twenty minutes.

As he puts it, and will likely state in his review. What the fuck was that? 'Cuz it sure as shit wasn't the Transformers.

I could go on and give a more in depth review, but I honestly don't care. For me this was crap. I have another friend who wants me to go with him to see this, but I'm trying to figure out how to get out of it.

Unfortunately I don't know if I can and who knows, maybe I was just in a bad mood. Maybe the film is better upon a second viewing, but I really doubt it.

Moving on...

but it sounded great...

These TRANSFORMERS TBs have been amongst the most contentious ever seen on AICN. Considering how the lines were drawn on this one, your reactions to the film are unexpected and a tad ironic. I find the idea that you guys are somehow "turncoats" or "plants" to be a bit silly...especially when you consider the fact that you are here, defending your thoughts and opinions.

I probably won't be able to see the film until Monday or Tuesday. I hope to find it worthwhile and entertaining. Until then...cheers!

For those interested.

I still haven't seen this yet, but after your reviews and the majority of good reviews above, I am even more excited!

I kind of knew that Yack would be at LEAST a little bit level-headed going into the film, but I was expecting venom from Messi! Way to prove me wrong, and good on you for being men enough to be truthful.

Would now be the time to admit to Memories of Murder that i AM Michale Bay?!

This isn't an 'I told you so', but do you see why I said I don't like to read scripts before I see a film?

I wonder what Superninja will make of all this?

I think most of the people that are digging this movie, really have low expectations for that kind of thing. why the hell did they even have so many little supporting characters if they were going to disappear for the last 3rd of the film. there was NO END to any of their arcs. None.

and having the big fight all in one intersection, more or less...did we not LEARN from Godzilla? and how many ways can you rip off the final fight scene with Neo and Agent Smith in the Matrix?

yes, megan fox is hot. yes, the robots fight. but it's too fast, and the robots are WAY too complicated looking, and you can't SEE SHIT during the fights. the camera is panning wildly, the robots are flying all over the fucking place, it's a mess. it's Micheal Bay.

more power to you if you like this shit, but if you have seen other Bay movies, and think their piles of turd, I can't see how you won't feel the same about this one. if it's brown and stinky and steaming, it's a pile of shit. bog robots fighting does not a quality film make.

BOG ROBOTS!!

if you had seen the film, you might have been unable to resist going up to Bay and telling him he was ruining cinema, lol.

*unless youo Iggy Pop.

I believe the script goes on to say something like "So this guy is responsible for my toaster?", UGH

http://tinyurl.com/ysezfu

it still makes me cringe whenever standards are lowered. after the first 20 minutes, Spielberg's presence was nowhere to be found. the movie had gaping plot holes, zero character development, cliches, ethnic stereotypes, horrible obvious product placement, illogical plot points, bad acting, bad writing, and the special effects that are supposedly so great speed back and forth all over the screen so quickly you can barely see them. add in the laughably bad dialogue form the Transformers which, although sounding goofily appropriate in the original series, sounds ridiculous coming from such complex looking creations in this film.

trust me, it's horrible. people are forgiving, because it's Transformers, and there are big robots fighting. well, great. but it would have been possible to actually make this a decent film as well. as it is, it's a terrible one. Pearl Harbor was better. don't drink the Kool-Aid. Micheal Bay is to cinema what Intelligent Design is to science...a hard slap in the fucking face, followed by a wink.

I'm just supposing, that's all. Don't worry. I'll be seeing the film within a week of it's release, and I will express my feelings then. Sorry it was such a bad experience for you. Go see "Once" as an antidote. It's a lovely little film with good music. It's the Anti-Bay.

1. Pwned

2. Owned

3. Noob

I'm used to white people taking black slang and running it into the ground Hell am I hater of weak cenima "popcorn movies"? Hell yes. I prefer actual Substance which according to Yack and messi this has, and don't worry BMWB I'll see this but I'm not paying.

Oh well. That might be fine criticism of it as a film, but as a HP film, I don't really think so. As HP moves further along, it might wear thin on people who do not follow the books.

bottom line, no one expected this to be great. Bay is simple incapable. people were just hoping it might be decent. and it looks like a lot of other reviews, including regulars whose opinions I respect, are more forgiving with Bay than I am, and enjoyed it.

but by ANY traditional measure, this movie is terrible. if you can somehow block out the logical and reasonable part of your brain that should wince at that crap, I suppose you could have a fun "roller coast thrill ride"!! I can't do it. and so the movie sucked for me.

little kids and guys that can't spell "banana", are particularly going to enjoy it.

http://filmfreakcentral.net/sc reenreviews/livefreeortransfor m.htm

also, Michael Bay thinks all black men yell and flail their arms, and scream and swear at their moms and grandmothers.

Anthony Anderson is the WORST part of this movie, bar none. his character is useless and not needed, his acting is atrocious, the lines written for him are horrendous, and he's in 2 of the 3 scenes that are so useless and slow, I cannot believe the producers left them in.

Nonetheless I'm looking forward to GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS bringing TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION.

and I hate to burst your bubble, but as I said before, anyone who is enjoying this movie is not doing so because it's a good movie. they're enjoying it because they're able to ignore all the crappy elements of it and just watch the big robots crash into each other. well fine, more power to them. I reviewed it as a film, form my perspective. if other people are able to revert back to their 7 year old selves and get lost in it, ignoring gaping plot holes, horrendous writing, terrible music, ethnic stereotypes, frantic editing, etc., that's fine. enjoy it! but I have to have faith that there are at least SOME people out there that expect more from a movie. and so I reviewed it thusly.

negativity for negativity's sake may be useless. but if a movie stinks, I'm gonna hold my nose and tell people to avoid it.

"The only thoughful reviews i have read above was from the negative reviews " - I mean listen to yourself; you're basically suggesting that the only worthwhile reviews of this film are negative ones. Wow, how fucking balanced and objective is that.

Is it so difficult for you to understand that people are enjoying this film and are being entertained by it?

You keep trotting out Batman Begins as some kind of Holy grail or yardstick; yes it was a fucking good Batman film, but as big a Batman fan as I am, I have to say, at no point during that film did I get any kind of adrenaline rush, or feel like I was witnessing some sort of spectacle.

It's balls to the wall action that gets that out of me; the Matrix Lobby fight, the first neo/Smith fight, the Maul/Qui-Gon/Obi-Wan fight, the T-Rex attack in Jurassic Park - big, flashy hi-impact scenes. As good as it was, Batman Begins had nothing like that.

Give it up - you're just sounding like a snobby tit now, and losing credibility fast. If you don't want to watch TF's fine; just stop pretending it makes you so much more intelligent and 'better' than the rest of us.

Sometimes people want high-octane, relatively low-brow entertainment - doesn't make them neanderthals; why is that so hard for YOU to understand?

The positive bits of the movie are really positive, I mean even the early scenes which have bumblebee as a car are really enjoyable.

Can't believe you gave in
To Michael Bay
Never thought I'd see
That sad, dreadful day

Remember TINO
Or have you forgotten?
The battles with Phartegodd
The man with two chins

Oh woe is me,
Oh woe is us
Bay put a pussy
On Optimus

Flames on Prime Batman has nipples Hollywood will continue To rape our childhoods.

"if you can't enjoy a film simply for entertainment's sake without ensuring it meets a checklist of high-brow criteria, then that's your fucking problem."

so the following things are "high brow criteria?":

a plot that makes sense
pacing that doesn't make you throw things at the screen
effects that you can actually see, not just a huge blur crashing back and forth
writing that doesn't sound like a 12 year old high on Mountain Dew wrote it?
any type of resolution to ANY characters besides one?
camera shots on important people and events, rather than whichever product paid the most money for screen time?

yeah, I guess I'm an elitist snob for wanting things like that in a film...you jackass.

I'm sure you will love Transformers. just make sure you buy your Mountain Dew before you turn your tiny brain off. that is the ONLY way to enjoy this film. anyone over the age of 12 that cna sit through it without rolling their eyes athow illogical and badly written it is, has that ability. *click*! ok, brain's off. bring on the robots. I don't have the ability.

but I'm sure you do, and I wish you a good time lining Bay's pimp pockets. hopefully he'll make Bad Boys III for you, before he does the Crapformers sequel...then you can have a real jizzfest HIGH OCTANE THRILL RIDE!!! DERRRRRRRRR

"I'm the master of low expectations." - George W. Bush

I mean, as long as were deluding ourselves...

Michael Moore for President

if you enjoyed the movie, fine. but that doesn't mean it's a good film. NO ONE had the stones, or the decreased mental acuity to claim it was good. yes, it will make bank, but it could have done a lot more business if they had put the effort into making it a decent flick, not full of plot holes and horrible writing.

but if that's your thing, and you can turn your brain off and enjoy it, more power to you...I bet you like Mountain Dew, huh?

but that doesn't make it a good film. I'm sorry people can't seem to wrap their brains around that.

and the worst part is, if they had had a different director, one that could have kept in all the fun fighting stuff (but shot it better) and who actually cared about a decent story, they could have had a really great film, and a true blockbuster.

as it is, only kids are going to want to see this movie more than once, and it ain't going to do the business it COULD HAVE, if they had a real director doing it.

Michael Bay thinks every one that sees his film is a moron, and he treats you thusly. so if you drink the kool-aid (mountain dew, in this case), and you love it, what does that say about you? not necessarily that you're an idiot, but that you have the ablility to sit in a theater seat, and turn into one for 2 hours.

and PLEASE don't give me the elitist line again...it's not elitist to want a plot that makes sense, and screenwriting that is not completely inept and idiotic. I'm not asking for Citizen Kane, for fuck sake. I just want some semblance of logic and rationality, and SOME sort of pacing that makes sense.

face it, we could have had a steak, but we get Michael Bay's overcooked table scraps instead...and you're sucking it dry because that's all you got. well fine, but until people refuse this kind of garbage, it's going to keep getting made.

and if you have seen it, I cannot believe you think it stands up to criticism in the same way Indiana Jones does...

trust me, when you see it, you'll understand.

it didn't, and I said so. there are moments in this movie where I swear half the people in the theater looked at the person next to them, mouthing, "what?"

but the other half were gleefully cheering. as I said, it will depend on your ability to turn your brain off.

LOL!!!

Almost all of the reviews that aren't plants are apologetic. Confirming what we already know, but adding a few extra words in ALL CAPS and a few extra exclaimation points doesn't really change my mind. (Also funny how you have to read through about 5 or 6 reviews before AICN throws in a negative one...just to be show how impartial they really are...)

I will still not pay to see this in theaters, regardless of how big of a fan I am. It's the principal of the thing. There's principalities involved. As soon as AXXO throws a good copy out there, I'll check this flick out. Anyone else who is sick of Hollywood ripping off things we care about just to make a quick buck, I advise you to do the same.

That said, bring on Harry Potter! A franchise that sticks to it's source material and respects it's fans!

You know, the only review I really cared about for this film was the Empire review http://tinyurl.com/27x22t

Th a is a proper review by a proper critic.

Four out of five they gave it. And that is what most people seem to agree with.

I am slightly confused by what Yack and Messi said, I haven't seen it but I can't see how any of what they said was not what they expected.

Surely they expected more action than they had ever seen and obvious but funny Bay stlye humour.

To me everything they described is what I thought we all expected, just what i wanted to see but what many of you didn't want to see.

I still doubt Superninja would like it, i think she is immune from Bay's charms but Yackbacker and Messi clearly let their inner 15 yr old boy rip free and had a whale of a time.

People saying 'told you so' are idiots, no-one said this was not going to be the ultimate Bay film, they just said they couldn't stand the idea of an ultimate Bay film.

and it's still a steaming turd.

haven't movies like PotC, Spiderman, X-men, etc. taught us that we CAN and SHOULD expect more from these types of films? why should we have to turn a blind eye to all of the fuck-ups and plot holes and lack of characterization? we CAN HAVE BOTH! until people stop going, "yeah a lot of it sucked, but it was a ", we are going to get less and less real movies, and more Bay shitstorms!

why isn't it OK to want more?

and this guy's idea of direction is, "go ahead Pontius, drink the horse jizz!"

I was looking forward to going to the movies and watching FF knowing it would be rubbish but looking forward to turning off the old brain and being enertained by big action, stupid humour and prdictable (but somehow comforting) plot mechanics.

And then I was looking forward to getting home and having the same experiance with Ghost Rider.

A perfect night of low expectations and fun.

But the problem was that neither was particuarly fun. None of the action in either was that impressive and they hardly even made me laugh. Even the first FF made me laugh.

That is why i can't wait for TF, we have had a summer where movies couldn't even manage to be big fun popcorn flicks. They where either too stupid (FF) or tried to be intelligent and just ended up convoluted (Pirates).

At the start of summer i wasn't as half as excited about TF because I assumed I would be satisfied by intelligent action (Spidey), stupid action (FF) and somewhere in the middle (Pirates) but none delivered.

So now all I have in terms of summer movies is TF.

But i n the real world we know that a lot of films are still going to be dumb. The studios need to feel like they have some controll so we will always have a varying ratio of xmen's to xmen 3's.

The thing with TF is at least it gets the big stupid action bits right.

FF and Ghost rider couldn't even do that bit right.

If there is two halfs to a film like this... the action and the intelligence then at least it gets one right rather than neither.

I tried to tell a lot of people that trying to read the script for an action movie is pointless.

With a movie that is 90% action it's really pointless.

Also, next time you are watching any movie of this type try imagining what a scene would be like if you read it on paper. It will fall apart. Many of our favorite movie quotes we probably would have laughed at had we read them first before seeing them on screen.

Reading a script actually takes experiance and training if there is a big visual element to it. It takes someone who has experiance because there is such a giant leap from what it is like on paper to what it is like on screen.

The effect of how different a movie plays and how flat and off it seems if you take away the soundtrack goes a long way to proving how misleading a script can be.

They are never the same kind of flat out wooden that the actors in FF are.

Bay always has a witty script (inevitable if you have 13 people writting one scene) and top actors.

Nic Cage and Sean Connery in the Rock.

Will smith and Martin Lawrence in Bad Boys.

Ewan McGregor in the Island.

Bruce Willis, Steve Buscemi and a load of others in Armageddon.

The point is he doesn't get a load of no-name actors to bluntly deliver the lines (he does that with the supporting cast), he gets a bunch of great actors to add a great dose of life to his movies.

Davy Jones is my man! I agree photorealistic for sure. Did TF manage to be more realistic than Davy Jones?

take the worst movie you've ever seen, and I can find you someone that enjoys it. does that mean it's quality? no. it means they have a different set of criteria with which to judge the film.

and as I've said a bunch of times, by any rational set of criteria, this film is technically not good. it simply isn't. if you enjoy it, it is NOT because it's well made, well written, or well acted. it's because you are willing to ignore the things that are not well done, and focus only on big robots fighting.

and GREAT, enjoy it! but that's not my sole criteria, and not the way I approach it. and they posted my review, and I'm gonna call it as I see it.

I sitll think Spielberg directed the first 20 minutes. there's no other wa to explain how good that was, vs. how bad the rest was...

I have always said that Bay is a terrible director and has not made one film that could generally be considered 'good' but i still love them.

I'd rather watch a big crappy Bay film than a big crappy Tim Story film.

At least Bay can do it right.

In fact I often notice he moves it more when there is just someone talking.

I haven't seen it but judging by Bay's other films I'd say it is not of the same standard.

The difference is that while Melissa Mathison invested genuine heart, emotion, character and humour into ET with TF it is a case of Bay telling a room of 10 script writers to invest all these qualities into the script.

Now the result might come out the same. I cried at the end of Armageddon like a big baby, I laughed my ass off too, and felt genuine emotion for the characters.

But it was all due to a team of higly trained script writers knowing the best line for the best point of time in any given moment.

ET had genuine heart, TF like Bay's other films has a false heart, just a very well put together false heart.

Yack, you and I have been in the talkbacks long enough that we've seen movies like this come and go, but we've also seen instances where movies have really knocked it out of the park. and I respect your opinion in general, and I respect the fact that you enjoyed this film, but you have to admit, you do have to, in some sense, ignore a LOT of faults in order to enjoy it, right?

I liken it to someone saying, "I don't care about Barry Bonds using steroids, he's still the man!"

a valid opinion, but still...he ain't Teddy Williams

you know what I mean?

Speilberg kind of did this with the family argument on the freeway in WOTW, the camer went around the traffic, under the car, through the windscree, all over the place and never cut once.

Someone needs to apply this technique to a car chase.

I hate the Fast and the furious idea of shot of wheel, shot of driver, shot of exhaust etc, it just takes away all tenision and excitment.

and Shia was gold, this movie would have been LOADS worse without him salvaging a lot of the humor and dialogue. of course, he was Spielberg's choice. ;o)

one of the only good things I take away from seeing this is that I'm TOTALLY excited for Indy 4. even with greasers, Shia is going to be quality.

and as for the long tracking shot, have you not seen the car chase in children of men???

BadMrWonka - you say Turturro must have been drunk when he agreed to do a Bay film.

I have always found tha a lot of very respectible actors jump to do a bay film. Look at the cast of armageddon...

Bruce Willis, Billy Bob Thornton, Ben Affleck, Liv Tyler, Owen Wilson, Will Patton, Steve Buscemi, Michael Clarke Duncan, Peter Stormare.

A lot of actors like Buscemi and Peter Stormare (who remember where only really big for Fargo at the time) only seem to do these type of movies when Bay asks them.

Nichols Cage only ever seemed to do action if Bruckheimer was involved.

and Buscemi will do anything. Big Daddy, anyone? Stormare I think has a serious alcohol problem and is not sure which movie he's in at any given point. Willis HATES Bay, so that doens't help the cause.

as soon as Cate Blanchett and Benecio del Toro act in a Bay film, I'll eat my own face.

Bay does have more explosions and unrealistic stuff but he always has a great sense of speed in his chases, something a lot of films can't pull off.

And i wouldn't be surprised to see Del Toro or Blanchet in a Bay film. He must hypnotise them or something.

michael bay BRING IT

I hate people who say every film they see that they don't like is the worst film ever, X3 was bad, especially compared to the first 2 but I could probably list hundreds of films that are worse.

And for once i'm actually looking forward to the - old guy/young guy dynamic between him and La Beouf.

Why shouldn't a 65 year old man have white hair?

Also it is bound to look whiter when he's speeding along on a bike and it's all being blown back.

I can't wait to see Indy trying to adjust to a new world and being all old-fashioned.

We have had the old guy in modern times meets young guy dynamic many times before except it is usually a contemporary movie.

This time the young guy won't be all ipod-hiphoped up on his rock-em-sock-em robots and gameboy hula hoops furbys and what ever else kids sniff these days because it is set in the 50's.

So we have the young-old dynamic (which, news flash, works when done right and that is why it is used a lot) except because it is not forced into modern day settings it will feel fresh.

What aspects of the film didn't work for you and why?

Still plenty of 50 year olds have white hair, especially back then. Hell one of my best mates is 41 and had white hair.

58!

Well I suppose that is only 6 years younger.

Do you jump up and down while typing or something?

What I don't get is if you hate this type of film and Bay's style so much why did you go and see it at all?

You must have been expecting cheese, illogical plotting and over the top editing. And from what most people say it is a lot more fun than shit like FF:ROTSS and a lot less cheesy and dumb than Bay's previous films.

I do agree with you on the 'phoned in' aspect of performances. In Bay's films he seems to concentrate on getting great turns out of some actors (La Beouf in this) and then refuses to even give direction to all the background government types etc.

I'd say it's not even fiunny...but it is funny...

The plethora of reviews Mori gave us gives you a pretty good indication how good this film is, with the majority of reviews being positive – and the only negative reviews come from diehard “Bay-hater” geeks trying to save face. Kudos to Yackbacker for a very honest review, one that I’d have to agree with (both the positive and negative points). Messi, you came close, but when you quibble over things that ultimately have no impact on the film at all (flames on Optimus, anyone?) then it seems you’re grasping at straws.

A few reviewers mentioned not being able to keep track what was going on during the fight sequences – I’m not sure where they’re coming from because I found that to be one of the strong points of the film – I never felt lost or unsure of who was fighting who, mostly due to the level of detail used for the transformers. Each face was distinctive, and if you couldn’t see the face you could at least identify parts of the vehicle they transform into to be able to work out who was who during action scenes. Usually for me, CG effects stick out like sore thumb, even in the LOTR films or ROTS, but in this movie I could barely tell the difference – they really are that good.

As for those bitching about the story – personally, I don’t really look for an incredible narrative when going to see an action film. I’ll leave that to films like Pan’s Labyrinth. Spiderman 3 and POTC3 had more plot than Transformers, yet Transformers shits all over those two films in terms of quality and entertainment value. It’s a film based on a cartoon series which were little more than glorified advertisements for a range of toys. A reviewer above (I think it was the same virgin who put a quote from the old Transformers animated film at the top of their review) referred to “the comprehensive tome of Transformer lore” - is that the 6-page booklet which tells you how to change it from a vehicle back to a robot?

As for the dialogue – yes, there is cheese and some bad jokes. But most of it works, or at least it did for me and the audience I was with, since the film doesn’t try to take itself too seriously. It’s no Armageddon, that’s for sure (and thank god). One of my friends even said to me as we were leaving the cinema: “I didn’t think it would be that funny.” As for the “my bad” stuff, it could have been worse. Considering that the Autobots learned our language from the world wide web, we’re lucky Optimus didn’t say “OMFG! My b4xor!! I’m such a noob!!! Lollerz!!!! OMGWTFBBQKK!!!!!”. In fact, we were lucky to be able to understand them at all.

I loved this movie. My younger brother, who still collects the toys and watches the old cartoons (while in his mid 20s!), loved this movie. My friends, who remembered nothing of the old Transformers except the theme tune (and that Autobots=good, Decepticons=bad), loved this movie. All of you will see it, even the ones adamant they won’t. Why? Because I said so, dumb ass - why else?

Are you saying TF DOESN'T make sense?! Did you have a hard time following it?! "pacing that doesn't make you throw things at the screen"

Well, that's YOUR opinion. If you like slow-paced films, don't watch TF's - go and see some French Arthouse.

"effects that you can actually see, not just a huge blur crashing back and forth"

I haven't had any problems seeing the effects on the many clips I have seen. Plus, the effects are one of the things this film is being praised for.

"writing that doesn't sound like a 12 year old high on Mountain Dew wrote it?"

Can't comment on that - haven't seen the film.

"any type of resolution to ANY characters besides one?"

When I read the script, everything seems pretty much resolved at the end, with the door left open for a sequel.

"camera shots on important people and events, rather than whichever product paid the most money for screen time?"

Again, I can't comment not having seen the film, but I would suggest that you're exaggerating. Besides, I never really notice product placement in films anyway.

"yeah, I guess I'm an elitist snob for wanting things like that in a film...you jackass."

No, I'd suggest you are imposing an unrealistic set of your own standards and opinions on a film which you were pre-disposed to hate... you cockarse.

"I'm sure you will love Transformers."

So am I.

"just make sure you buy your Mountain Dew before you turn your tiny brain off."

Unfortunately, Mountain Dew is not available in the UK, however I did enjoy many ice-cold cans of it on Exercise in the Omani desert back in '01. As for my tiny brain; I've probably killed more brain cells with drink than you'll ever HAVE.

"that is the ONLY way to enjoy this film. anyone over the age of 12 that cna sit through it without rolling their eyes athow illogical and badly written it is, has that ability. *click*! ok, brain's off. bring on the robots. I don't have the ability."

Well, the only person I actually accused of being a snob was MoM, but after that last paragraph you've basically just demonstrated my point for me. Cheers! And there's me thinking it WASN'T a crime to enjoy entertainment for entertainment's sake...

"but I'm sure you do,"

Yup. "and I wish you a good time lining Bay's pimp pockets."

Thank you! I hope Bay spends it on something he really enjoys, like coke, or prostitutes, or coke-covered prostitutes.

"hopefully he'll make Bad Boys III for you, before he does the Crapformers sequel"

I hope not, because I didn't like Bad Boys II - it went on FAR too long, and bored me to tears.

"...then you can have a real jizzfest HIGH OCTANE THRILL RIDE!!! DERRRRRRRRR"

No, I'll wait for the TF's sequel.

Some Iron Maiden wouldn't have gone amiss I reckon...

enjoy it...

Why, thank you. As I said before, I'm sure I will.

Then it's just a case of waiting for The Dark Knight, Watchmen and the TF's sequel.

Took balls to admit to being wrong, however, even judging by your and Yack's climbdowns it still sounds like I'll hate it.

But I might rent it now.

BTW worst product placement ever= I, Robot.

"Converse 1999 vintage", "Nice Shoes".

FUCK OFF