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A Couple Of TRANSFORMERS Reviews For You!

first by supercowbell 4 cant stop the cowbell	Jun 16th, 2007 02:59:53 AM
f42 sucks
Screw this by Otto Parts	Jun 16th, 2007 03:03:14 AM
Where's my frickin' Care Bears movie?
Hey, third positive review! by Playkins	Jun 16th, 2007 03:04:38 AM
Haters will have a hard time justifying themselves.
I CANT FUCKING WAIT FOR THIS by supercowbell 4 cant stop the cowbell	Jun 16th, 2007 03:10:43 AM
pirates 3 was good(dragged in the middle though) and im looking to add another summer movie to the list.
Oh yeah bro? by Darth__Moa	Jun 16th, 2007 03:10:48 AM
Mean Maori Mean. Sounds like it'll be mint. Should get on the chop and go watch it while ya maggot then it'll never fail to please.
best stupid film of the summer by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 03:10:53 AM
Hooray!!! I think I'll just watch Rataouille and wait for Bourne Ultimatum.
A BIG FUCK YOU TO ALL THE HATERS!! by bongo123	Jun 16th, 2007 03:14:11 AM
ive yet to see one shit review for the movie you wankers have done nothing but diss from day 1.... i laugh in your face you cretins HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! your most hated director has hit this one outa the ballpark and your flames on optimus/tino bullshit G1 crybaby fucking antics have all been for nothing... DONT YOU ALL LOOK FUCKING STUPID NOW YOU WANKERS! flame on dickheads!
best stupid movie of the year > popcorn movie by jingle_balls	Jun 16th, 2007 03:15:33 AM
so giant robots from outer space is stupid, yet we can believe a spider biting someone makes him shoot web from his wrists, pirates that cant die, bruce willis can drill a hole in an asteroid o save the world. im beginning to think people are finding strange reasons to compare movie. MOST MOVIES ARE STUPID!
Now that they've jumpstarted the franchise... by CaptainGilgore	Jun 16th, 2007 03:17:28 AM
they can pick a REAL director for Transformers 2. Let's face it, Bay was about as safe a choice as you could make. You knew he could handle a big set and special effects. You knew it would be loud. And maybe he'd do some stupid shit, but the Transformers name would override that. So who's your pick for the next director? I say give it to David Fincher or one of those Mexican directors. ---- I think it's funny that Bay admitted to knowing nothing about the Transformers when he took the job. But then once he got it he went to, da da daaaaa, "Transformers School". Oooh, he must've done a lot of research for that! With that moron's ultra-advanced form of A.D.D., he probably watched one and a half episodes of the cartoons and then had one of his assitants play with the toys for an hour and write a report for him. What a joke.
Trailer was just too good... by forgot_old_username	Jun 16th, 2007 03:23:04 AM
These reviews have provided a reality check. It is just a big dumb Michael Bay film based on a toy after all. The sheer beauty of the footage in the trailer lead me hope that there was something special about this film. It's kind of reassuring to be reminded that this films is basically just Pearl Harbour with giant toys.
Sequel= Zombie Optimus vs Starscream's Ghost by PacmanFever	Jun 16th, 2007 03:24:17 AM
Did you know they actually made a toy of Starscream's Ghost?
Reeks of compost by darrenspool	Jun 16th, 2007 03:24:58 AM
I'm sick of these fake reviews. You can tell so easily. They never mention anything new. Nothing about the action sequences or how monstrous the transformers are. Their vocals. I hate this crap! They're freakin PLANTS!
Obviously... by Redfive!	Jun 16th, 2007 03:29:01 AM
Neither review is an original Transformers fan,both didnt seem to know what The Energon Cube was there opinion means ZERO. Im sure this film looks great,actually I know it does but is it true to the Transformers,doesnt seem like it,I guarantee this film gets looked apon like I,Robot or ID4 in years to come.
Here's hoping Transformers--Potter--Die Hard... by Big Dumb Ape	Jun 16th, 2007 03:31:49 AM
...Make for alot more fun at the multiplex than Spiderman, Pirates, and Shrek did. Which wouldn't be too hard since all three of the "threes" were overblown let downs (least to me). I'm actually far more jazzed about the movies to come then what's been tossed at us so far. And I don't care what the purists say about flames or continuity changes and so on -- TRANSFORMERS looks like the perfect summer geek film that the little kid in us has been jonesing for all year long.
jeez....i hope this does not start the old tf tb hatin by Motoko Kusanagi	Jun 16th, 2007 03:38:58 AM
again, 'cause I'm fed up with it. We know it sucks 'cause of Bay, flames, busy designs and whatnot. Now, move along and let us enjoy TRANSFORMERS.
MUCH assembly required by Howling_Fantods	Jun 16th, 2007 03:42:14 AM
... ...because the movie sucks. It's a sad state when CG robots are more believable than human characters. Seriously, it was a mess. And I really set the bar low before going into this screening. A few good robot battles here & there, that's if you could process what was happening on screen. The design of the robots wasn't substantial enough. Many times you couldn't make out who was fighting who, what was going on, why do I even give a shit at this point? And this humor the reviewers are talking about...awful. not funny. didn't laugh once. Strike that, when Megatron says "disgusting" as he flicks an injured bystander...apart from that, lame.
Megan Fox by kwisatzhaderach	Jun 16th, 2007 03:46:07 AM
is hot.
nerds arguing = heroin for Wonka by BadMrWonka	Jun 16th, 2007 03:47:18 AM
and I'm back off the wagon...
Hate this film all you want BUT..! by CeejayNightwing	Jun 16th, 2007 04:00:11 AM
It's going to be the biggest film of the year either way and you'll only wnd up being part of the tail-enders who "eventually" get around to watching it in its dying weeks in a less spectacular cinema screen with less spectacualr sound system. All you so called Transformers fans who are still holding some misguided loyalty to a 80's cartoon show as if its some holy grail are kidding yourself if you think you can go the whole summer without watching this film. The cartoon is ridiculous but we let all the silly stuff pass us by becasue we were young, the story in this film makes ten times more sense and the effects are stunning. GO SEE IT!
WTF IS TINO? by boogy110	Jun 16th, 2007 04:31:55 AM
SOME EXPLAIN THAT TO ME PLEASE. OH, IT'S A FUCKING MOVIE ABOUT A TOY!!!!! JUST ENJOY THE FUCKING THING AND STOP THINKING OF IT AS A WORK OF ART. STOP BITCHING ABOUT BAY!!! WHO THE FUCK DO YOU WANT DIRECTING, FORD COPPOLA???? GET A LIFE!
TINO MEANS TRANSFORMERS IN by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 04:49:42 AM
TINO MEANS TRANSFORMERS IN NAME ONLY!! I find the Transformer fans to be psychos, but these reviews just confirm what I already assumed...the reason no reviewer has talked about the plot is because there isn't one. Its just CGI and I feel that ILM should be congratualted on that not Bay. Why can't we have great action with a good storyline?!?! It's like they are incompatible now. And no excuses like 'its a summer popcorn flick' I bought into that excuse and had to watch the painstakingly rubbish Pirates 3 and Spiderman 3.
Fuck you Paramount by watashi-wa	Jun 16th, 2007 04:53:50 AM
The UK doesn't get this movie until July 27th, which means I'm going to have to work really hard to avoid any spoilers for three weeks or so in order to actually enjoy the fucking movie. Seriously - why in fuck's name is there such a delay between the US and UK releases? Is there any logical, sensible or even STATED reason for this? So, again, FUCK YOU PARAMOUNT!
yeah the UK release is so delayed by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 04:59:53 AM
Most will have already downloaded it on bittorrent or something. Plus its released on the same weekend as The Simpsons Movie so it wont make nearly as much as it would have if released around July 4th.
phoenixmagi by watashi-wa	Jun 16th, 2007 05:00:48 AM
Yeah, it was made in America, that's all well and good, but if that's the reason, then why do, say Austria, Holland and Russia all get it on the same day as the USA? Fuck Paramount.
Bunch of wankers by jfp2007	Jun 16th, 2007 05:02:36 AM
Bay made this exactly like anyone else would have. Ever watched a TF cartoon. This movie is what those were. Lots of action, effects, and minimal plot.
Remember the good ole days... by TinSpider	Jun 16th, 2007 05:04:37 AM
When plot, storytelling and FX could all exist in a film. So far I've read quite a few 'no plot, but great FX' reviews for this film.. Not that everyone getting cashback from this will give a fuck what with almost every product available in the world having a fucking transformers logo plastered on it. I know the original was basicly a huge advert for toys, but for fucks sake. Talk about overkill.
Transformers went beyond.. by TinSpider	Jun 16th, 2007 05:07:49 AM
the shitty cartoon and the toys. The comics established a more darker serious tone with some good writing. So fuck off with your 'what do you want from a cartoon' There's far more source material available than a kids show.
Society is eating itself by IndustryKiller!	Jun 16th, 2007 05:20:03 AM
Nothing more can be said about this debacle.
And Mori you should be ashamed of yourself by IndustryKiller!	Jun 16th, 2007 05:27:08 AM
After your brilliant idea with the write ups of memories from '82 in an effort to spark the imagination of the old days you simultaneously justify and make excuses for Michael bays crusade for dumbing down cinema as we know it. Sad my friend.
IndustryKiller! by TinSpider	Jun 16th, 2007 05:29:57 AM
word.
Triffid! by CuervoJones	Jun 16th, 2007 05:34:46 AM
Plant!
Australia No. 1 by Maclovin	Jun 16th, 2007 05:48:02 AM
It was made in the US... but Australia gets it on June 28th, mwahaha...
Aint it suck. by Thylacine	Jun 16th, 2007 05:49:00 AM
Sure the movie is a baaaaaaad movie with insulting female stereotypes, lame plot devices, zero character development, and a lazy director- but teh 'splosion make my cock bigger. These reviews suck Megatron's ice-packed vagina dentata. Quit making excuses for crap films. This could have been cool- but by the news, it’s not.
Mori, that first review was bursting with Chlorophyll: by newc0253	Jun 16th, 2007 05:52:41 AM
but i'm still gonna see this thing in theatres regardless.
Oh, and Ratatouille will make more money. by Thylacine	Jun 16th, 2007 05:59:32 AM
Notice how they mixed CG and story- and somehow got a good movie? Pixar gonna kick TINO's ass.
How the HELL are you people swallowing this?! by Horseflesh	Jun 16th, 2007 06:01:48 AM
Must be practice. Christ I haven't seen a review yet that didn't mention flaw after flaw followed by "BUT I FUCKIN LOVED IT!". Harry has taught you all to love the smell of dog farts.
Industry Killer... by TheRealMoriarty	Jun 16th, 2007 06:10:54 AM
... I'm not making excuses for Bay's film. I haven't seen Bay's film. But the people I know who have seen it seem to be digging it. Of course, Harry loved FANTASTIC FOUR 2, and I thought it was rancid cheese. Who knows what I'll say when I see the movie? I'm just reporting what I'm hearing so far. Relax. If I don't like it, I'll be perfectly happy saying so. And if I do, it won't be because I think it's "acceptably stupid." Have you ever heard me be a Bay apologist in the past ten years? The man won't even speak to me when we are in the same room because he's so sure I hate his work.
Moriarty by watashi-wa	Jun 16th, 2007 06:20:21 AM
fancy asking them why the UK doesn't get it til July 27th? ;) (In all seriousness, I would love to know if there's any excuse for this sort of thing nowadays. It surely can't be to do with rating or anything like that.)
Come on. This will be fun!!! by Col. Tigh-Fighter	Jun 16th, 2007 06:27:39 AM
You know some movies are meant to be fun to watch. Independance Day, Swordfish, and now Transformers. Fun, fun, fun.
Is he right Mori? by IndustryKiller!	Jun 16th, 2007 06:31:47 AM
Because I cannot think of a single reason after The Rock why you shouldn't hate his work. The mother fucker absolutely delights in promoting the absolute worst that overblown American culture has to offer. Standing as a hero to the douche bags who would rather eat lead than sit through something "pretentious". All too willing to cater to the "Average filmgoer" who is already so fat on terrible cinema that every day it seems more and more likely they have lost any barometer for telling the difference. Single handedly shirking criticism by turning the fact that his product is garbage into an asset with the non-argument "he does what he does very well". The irony of that statement is that it's dead wrong. His films look expensive sure, but his overreliance on quick cut editing is a tell tale sign of a hack action director. Character? Fuck character. Even know it's the ingredient EVERY SINGLE good action film has. It's not even arguable that Michael Bay is bad for anyone who truly enjoys movies. There is literally nothing to like about the man, but he seems to have launched an almost teflon Bushesque image in which everything that he does so deadly wrong only cements his status further to the squirming masses underneath him. It's pathetic and scary that people just love to be so willingly gullible.
funny by slkboxrman	Jun 16th, 2007 06:37:08 AM
...how phoenixmagi mumbles and rambles on in one sentence posts just like that stupid ninja giy does.....do i smell a 2nd name ? get banned or something...also funny how any positive reviewer instantly gets branded a "PLANT" ..god forbid the movie is actually good..all the haters would simultaneouly have coronaries and die from shock...the movie WILL rock and WILL be great...you want a good story, read a book, a real book...transformers, cartoon, comic or otherwise never had a good story....the comics were the worst....and NO NO NO NO i dont want no mexican directing the sequel....if this one breaks records , bay deserves the sequel or sequels....funny how no one mentioned how the first reviewer said most of the transformer, good and bad survive...but the haters prob just ignored it and called him a plant because it contradicts the "leaked" sript they all read last year ...this movie will rock, break records , and kick spiderman and pirates ass....no one will touch it....guarantee
Holy shit, IndustryKiller! nailed it! by Horseflesh	Jun 16th, 2007 06:42:24 AM
Bay is the George Bush of Hollywood directors!! It doesn't matter how bad he fucks up or pisses all over what is right and good, some people are gonna wave that flag anyways and scream "But we're winning!" All while the man hates them in silence.
industry killer by slkboxrman	Jun 16th, 2007 06:44:07 AM
if u want to "truly enjoy movies"....watch lifetime, they have tons of character and story driven movies and TV shows for your very obvious sensitive side... real men and real transfans want to see explosions and giant robots kickin ass..... armageddon was very character driven and was a great story...wasnt all special effects, so beyond "the rock" he did have several movies that were great...as much as it may kill u, box office receipts determine a movie or a directors success...and as far as i know all of his movies, including pearl harbor made major green....who cares if he aint touchy feely enuf with your childhood...get a hanky and cry.....im surprised u dont recommend woody allen direct the sequel...
tigh-fighter by slkboxrman	Jun 16th, 2007 06:51:48 AM
of course it wil be fun... these haters dont want fun....they want to be touched deep in their childhood souls.....they want to cry and hold a candle in the air as their daddy optimus prime talks...waaa waaa.....also of note for all u frank welker fans that say he was the only one that should be megatron...i think all the haters would be surprised to know he only voiced megatron for 23 episodes while someone else did the majority of the eps...dont believe me ? check IMDB......but you are right , movies are supposed to be fun, and a transformers movie should be fun..and most of these serious fans in here are first to say how they beat off to megan fox whenever they get the chance....so eye candy is ok as long as its wankable, i guess..
Megan Fox = "younger, hotter Sheryl Crow?" by tylerzero	Jun 16th, 2007 06:52:27 AM
What the hell kind of beer goggles is that reviewer looking at Sheryl Crow through? Apples and oranges, apples and oranges.
IndustryKiller! sour milk, table for 1 by Mr_X	Jun 16th, 2007 07:07:32 AM
really you are such a fucking whiny bitch. fuck off and let other who want to watch the movie do so without your constant fucking bullshit.
slkboxrman by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 07:13:43 AM
what a load of crap, although I do agree industrykiller is getting far to emotional over a film which had nothing to go by but a stupid cartoon. I dont think anyone asking for stories or character should be ridiculed...matter of fact I think the opposite while losers who can enjoy a film for explosions and big robots should be made sterile.
I call plant. Nothing about the PUSSY ON OPTIMUS? by PUSSY ON OPTIMUS	Jun 16th, 2007 07:14:04 AM
Oh, how convenient that the most highly rendered, least blocky, and most realistic set of a female genitals ever on a CG robot that isn't designed to sell toys like its 80's predecessor goes unmentioned in this and all other reviews posted on this site so far. Seriously, there's a lot people lining up to take off their pants, turn off their brains, eat some popcorn, and watch stuff blowup, but the most relevant CG rendering of our era has been masked in shadow by Bay, Murphy, and the studios (probably Harry too). What's the big secret? All everyone wants to know is if the PUSSY ON OPTIMUS is really deserving of all the hype. If it underperforms in this film, don't make excuses for it, just be up front about it.
craaaaaaaaaaaaaaap by foree forehead	Jun 16th, 2007 07:16:50 AM
even these "good" reviews basically call the movie a plotless pile of shit.
Both of these reviewers can fuck off. by LordEnigma	Jun 16th, 2007 07:19:59 AM
Seriously, if I want to read people trying to review above their pay grade. I will go read Slate. Seriously brahs...Seriously. Yep, feel that reference, but it's not a MACGUFFIN. It's what this entire TRILOGY OR SAGA will be based off of in the future. They believe they are at an end. When really...this is just the beginning.
I give up! by tile_mcgillus	Jun 16th, 2007 07:32:56 AM
Those reviews say the same fucking thing as all the rest. Bad script, cool special effects! I could have written that same review on day fucking two of the transformers overhype machine. Fine, whatever I get it now. I get it. Apaarently I WAS asking for too much when I said there should be a good script. Well, shame on me. SHAME! There is something wrong here. I don't know what it is. It might be the stench of lowered expectations...or the sweet refreshing scent of take what you can get. Those things are the things that bother me. It is like the TBers at AICN have just given up. We the "rabid ferrets in a sack" are letting a movie pass on some flimsy shit. You think Bay can make a cut where he just cuts out the 80% of the movie that sucks (All the positive reviews say so) and features the cool robots killing each other? Doubt it. I could be out of the theatre in a half hour...
This movie smells of Wensleydale cheese!! by football	Jun 16th, 2007 08:01:52 AM
Greats effects: TICK. No plot: TICK. Terrible actors: TICK. Terrible director: TICK. Movie game tie-ins: TICK. Unfunny cheesey dialogue: TICK. Avoid this shit at all costs: TICK
Boy, they sure are afraid of getting fired by Kragmose	Jun 16th, 2007 08:09:31 AM
Yup
What is a good Transformers script? by theyreflockingthisway	Jun 16th, 2007 08:10:15 AM
To be honest I'd say the best you can do is the relationship between Sam (Spike) and Bumblebee as his first car like in the film. I've read every Transformers comic, seen the TV series and the animated movie and I honestly can't think of a single story that'd make a decent movie script. The story for the original movie was awful - Unicron attacks Cybertron then he's defeated. It then goes on to claim this marks a new era of peace with no possible basis for why that would occur. Some of the comic stories were good, especially the likes of Target 2006, but none of them would make a decent movie (maybe as a sequel, but not an origin story). Oh and to address the issues this should have been set on Cybertron with no (or minimal) humans like the original movie - no one would get that except hardcore fans. The appeal is they turn into Earth vehicles so they need to be on Earth to do that. I think people should stop complaining about the story - it's Transformers and I think the story I've heard this movie is about is about one of the best they can do. I mean look at ET - all the script is about is a boy who befriends and alien that wants to "phone home". The movie itself is a completely different experience and you know there's a lot more to it than the basic plot.
AICN won't post a negative review by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 08:12:22 AM
But even the most positive reviews say the plot is stupid and illogical. Let's look at this movie's assets: 1. Special FX 2. Megan Fox's tits and ass. Boy, I'm glad they went out of their way to finally make a TF movie. Imagine what I'd be missing out on if they hadn't???
All this ANGER makes me laugh! by Captain RawBeard	Jun 16th, 2007 08:13:12 AM
Seriously guys, you are all going to burst a blood vessel if you dont chill out, Take a Deep Breath and say to yourself its only a Movie. If I don't like the look of it I wont go see it. Theres no point in getting myself worked up for it. Personally I am looking forward to it, No I am no a Bay apologist but quite frankly I cant think of another director who could handle the explosive action that this film requires. Dont know why the first Reviewer said the Ang Lee Hulk was a debacle. Seeing as it is one of best Comic Book adaptations. But then again I am not going to stress myself out over it.
I LOVE MICHAEL BAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by lost.rules	Jun 16th, 2007 08:16:27 AM
He's like the AntiChrist. He inspires so much hate.
MICHAEL BAY IS THE MOTHERFUCKIN ANTICHRIST!!!! by lost.rules	Jun 16th, 2007 08:19:07 AM
Him, or Harry Potter. Can't decide who?
erm by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 08:39:45 AM
I dont think its the fact that the plot is illogical or stupid but the fact that with a talented director it could still be executed well. We have seen about 10 reviews for Transformers on AICN and none of them had anything to do with the plot or characters...every single one of them have said that the plot is badly executed or just plain sucks and the acting is terrible but there is alot of explosions and fighting robots so all is forgiven. So I expect Transformers to open HUGE and than drop out of sight within a week.
I still have a question by BL Chick	Jun 16th, 2007 08:49:20 AM
Does Starscream still sound like a pissy drag queen or not? As a G1 fan, I want to know.
Interesting distinction, lionbiu by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 08:52:19 AM
But that makes me think-- what examples do you know of where a director succeeded at elevating a poor plot? I know there are movies like that out there, but I'm drawing a blank this AM.
When does this movie come out? by lost.rules	Jun 16th, 2007 08:52:35 AM
6/26/07?
HA! by Mr. Nice Gaius	Jun 16th, 2007 08:57:31 AM
Well, that first review reads like a plant going through a goddamn checklist. The second review (or "reaction") reads like the guy was too lazy to put any effort into it = probably not a franchise fan. These types of reviews are meaningless, IMHO.
Keep paying to see stupid movies... by KillDozer	Jun 16th, 2007 09:05:24 AM
and that's all you're going to get. Enjoy your PG-13 CGI demo reel, real men. If you feel a little empty afterwards, try renting Robocop. You get to see robots fighting and explosions, plus there's an actual good plot. Oh, and they can say "fuck" and even show blood and breasts.
Sigh by DrPeterVenkman	Jun 16th, 2007 09:06:05 AM
All these "glowing" reviews are just further cementing my disappointment. I have no problem with going to see a movie about giant fucking robots. I just wish they didn't have to destroy the Transformers property to do it. I wish they would get a hold of something the TF apologists love (Rainbow Brite, My Little Pony) and make a crappy movie out of it, so they could feel my pain. So enjoy your generic mindless, indecipherable ass kicking robot, retarded joke-making, no plot summer popcorn flick. DVD Release date: estimated November 12th. On Piratebay: November 1st. On my home theater: November 1st.
The Memflix Effect by Neck Boy	Jun 16th, 2007 09:15:46 AM
From Fox Searchlight Pictures comes a new thriller directed by Sidney Lumet...Tim Robbins plays a mild-mannered film projectionist who mistakenly stumbles upon a secret cabal of shadowy men in dark rooms...what dangers lie ahead for this man who claims his innocence? See it. THE MEMFLIX EFFECT. Rated PG13 for strong langage and confusing Talkback logic.
my examples by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 09:29:42 AM
I would consider The Matrix (which looked awful on paper...especially the first draft) a well execution. Pitch Black, Cube, Jurassic Park (the book was terrible in my opinion and so was the script), Escape for New York and Spiderman..all these films on paper don't look great and their plot is highly illogical and even paper thin but with excellent execution they all became far more than the sums of thier parts.
oops by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 09:33:22 AM
that supposed to be Escape from New York...also add OldBoy to that list, a great example of brilliant execution to enhance a weak plot
May cause diarrhea or nosebleeds by Vern	Jun 16th, 2007 09:34:49 AM
So far all the reviews I've read start out with a list of disclaimers longer than a prescription drug commercial. If this movie really is so fun I hope somebody eventually has the balls to praise it without apologizing first.
Good examples, lionblu by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 09:36:30 AM
Its funny that after several years, those movies lose a lot of their original charm (save for ESCAPE FROM NY, which is always watchable). I can't sit through PITCH BLACK or JURASSIC PARK anymore. I get antsy and bored. And FINALLY, someone says something bad about OLD BOY. Dude, I thought I was the only one that wasn't feelin' that movie. Thank you!
yikes by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 09:41:54 AM
"some of the action here (and in other scenes) is so fast that it's hard to distinguish who is who, who is good, who is bad and what's happening. I think that's why I missed Megatron's arm cannon." Why can't any of these reviewers follow the plot? No one knows what's going on, but they all love how loud and pretty it is..... Lowest. Common. Denominator.
Vern by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 09:43:36 AM
exactly
Movie sounds awful by Don_Knotts	Jun 16th, 2007 09:45:46 AM
I feel like peoples standards are dropping at an alarming rate. Why is it ok for this movie to have no plot and bad jokes? Shouldn't that make it, you know, bad?
Good reviews? Really? by Magpye	Jun 16th, 2007 09:49:54 AM
Geez, they sound more like half-assed apologies and excuses rather than 'glowing' reviews. "Uh, there's bad acting, stupid plot, cheesy camera work, elements of Jar Jar (the iPod robot), but it's got GREAT CG AND GIANT FUCKING ROBOTS!" I think everyone already agrees that the action sequences will be edge-of-your-seat fair, but what most of you don't seem to get is that the so-called 'haters' only want this 'good' movie to be something 'great'. It has all the potential in the world to be a fantastic movie, so why do you want to accept such a half-assed effort? Think of the 'haters' like high-school football coaches who yell and push the players, because they know they're capable of so much more. I don't think anyone wants this movie to suck, we just want it to be good and not insulting to our intelligence. To bring up the Ang Lee/Hulk thing was dumb move really, because there are plenty of action-oriented films out there with intelligent plots. I think someone like Doug Liman would have been more than up to the task of directing this.
Magpye by DrPeterVenkman	Jun 16th, 2007 09:53:18 AM
I put "glowing" in quotes because it was meant to be a little sarcastic...but I think your football coach analogy is right on! Well put!
Alternative directors to Mike Bay (a short list) by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 09:56:23 AM
Brad Bird, Alex Proyas, Ridley Scott (cue soft lens shot of Prime petting a Unicorn), James Cameron (pay him with 25% of opening weekend gross, he'll come to work, trust me), Guillermo Del Toro, heck, even STEVEN FUCKING SPIELBERG. Anyone with the slightest sign of brain activity that "Blow'd Up!" Bay so obviously lacks.
This film had tremedous potential by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 09:56:35 AM
It could have been so much more than a painfully stupid SFX reel. Evidently that what the majority want though. It's stupid, but that's ok since the action is incomprehensible and loud.
An anti-intellectual director by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 09:58:52 AM
for the anti-intellectual masses
If you wanna praise a film without apologizing first... by DerLanghaarige	Jun 16th, 2007 10:03:08 AM
...then get into your time machine and travel back to the days where talkbacks and the "everything sucks and if you like it, you are an idiot or a plant"-attitude didn't exist!
yeah that bothered me too by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 10:05:12 AM
The action is great, but supposedly the reviewer can't even see most of it because Bay uses his typical ADD camera angles/moves. That's what really has killed the movie for me...it what almost killed Batman Begins. This need to have the camera constantly moving and jittering for no other reason but to add 'excitement' for the teen crowd. What happen to the steady cam and stationary shots?!?
My bad. by blackmantis	Jun 16th, 2007 10:06:07 AM
Having non-black characters using black slang has never, and will never be funny. What's next, white actors wearing shoe polish and calling each other mammy? This must stop.
DerLanghaarige, you have a point but by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 10:07:32 AM
These reviewers are telling us "Ignore the fact that the acting and plot stink!" Sorry, but that sounds like hedging to me. Whatever, this movie will make a shitload of money and those people that consistently eat this sort of thing up will declare it the greatest thing ever. If it's good, I'll say as much. But the only opinion that really matters to me is my own. My name is YackBacker and I'm a person!
agreed by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 10:12:56 AM
there is a differnce between a review which lists some negatives (weaker performences by certain cast members, a plothole or two, etc..)But these reviews have been asking us to ignore story, acting, character devlopment, basic direction etc...all for big explosions and fighting robots. That's just idiotic...those are the fundamentals for filmaking, its like asking us to watch a basketball match but just ignore the errors, fouls, travelling and the fact that all the players are blind albino orangutans and just focus on the scoreboard which looks great.
steady cam and stationary shots by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 10:14:00 AM
Oh they're still done, just never by asshats who "shoot for the edit" like Michael (I wish my daddy was John Frankenheimer so I could be cut some artistic slack and taken more seriously based soley on the namesake of a director I will never come close to emulating) Bay.
Morons by The Decider	Jun 16th, 2007 10:14:08 AM
Have any of you watched the original transformers animated movie lately? I have. It is TERRIBLE. Don't act like the transformers was a great license to begin with. It sounds like this movie is roughly eleventy billion times better than it deserves to be.
Special effects apparently justify having no plot by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 10:14:49 AM
or characterization.
The animated movie was absolute shit by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 10:18:58 AM
IMHO, and yet it's storyline is superlative to this SFX ridden debacle. If you think the Transformers is not a great license with an immense amount of potential and possibilities (all of which have been sidesteped by the filmmakers involved with TINO) then you lack more scope and vision than I do.
typing fury equates to poor grammar by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 10:21:49 AM
^
DrPeterVenkman by Magpye	Jun 16th, 2007 10:28:22 AM
Haha, I hadn't actually read through the talkback at the point when I posted so I wasn't really quoting anyone in particular when I used the word 'glowing'. :)
Energon Cubes not in this movie!! by CeejayNightwing	Jun 16th, 2007 10:45:31 AM
The Cube they refer to in both reviews are not the stupid energon cubes from the cartoon that so much of you haters wanting to use it as white flag to label the review a plant! The cube in the movie is more like the Matrix of leadership in the animated movie, it's the device that first brought life to the Transformers. Quite simply the die-hards can stay put in 1980 with their toy designs and stupid tit-for-tat style epsiodic brawling between the handful of Autobots with their only two human buddies and the other bunch of brawling Decepticons. The cartoon was fun but STUPID AS HELL! This film is less stupid and makes ten times more sense in every department. STEP INTO THE A.M!! Why the hell would a 25 foot leader of an alien race disguise himself as a World War II German handgun? How can a VW Beetle make a good disguise amongst the bevy of new and fashionable cars of today? And what's the point fighting over Earth's limited resources to convert into Energon Cubes if you can choose any of the other larger, more resourceful and less inhabited planets in the Solar System to choose from not to mention solar-energy from the blasted sun? You die-Hards need to shelve that ridiculous love for your 80's childish things and simply give the film-makers credit for doing something more credible with the general concept of Transformers because in reality that's all their is left to make a decent movie from that cartoon.. a concept!
VW New Beetle by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 10:53:17 AM
Not new and fashionable? My wife would strongly disagree. She loves hers. http://tinyurl.com/2ymdrh
HAISAN YOU ARE A F**NG ASSHOLE!!! by ludmir88	Jun 16th, 2007 10:56:24 AM
and maybe you are right too, but i don't care.
Here's your chance to stand up by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 10:59:37 AM
It's kind of difficult to make a movie of this nature people. You have to please Hasbro, Dreamworks, all of the third party people like GM, the hardcore fans, and the kids of today..Theres a big difference between the cartoons we watched and what the kids watch now. Like it or not this is essentialy a kids of today movie. They want to build a franchise not just cater to the group of 30 somethings who still remember the cartoon, and have enough free time to give a shit about this movie. They're far more concerned with making the movie "accessible "to everyone whether they're familiar with the transformers "mythos" or not. If they had started with the crash land of the ark it would have been a big origin movie, this way they jump right in and have fights the whole way through the movie. Truth is if they had stuck to the designs and stories we remember perhaps it wouldn't do as well as it's going to. I was a huuuge transformers fan growing up Optimus Prime was the first thing I ever drew and the first thing I ever modeled in 3d. When I saw the flames on Optimus, read the script,saw the direction they were going yeah I had some issues..but they got enough right for us Cullen especially..and they exceeded my expectations with the scope, agility, aggresivness, and speed of these Transformers. Go back and look at the cartoon again and if you can truly sit through 3 episodes (that arent the original more than meets the eye or unltimate doom storylines) hats off to you. I compare this movie to Jurassic Park another fun exciting movie everyone can see and enjoy which will strech our ideas of what is visually possible. Jurassic park didn't have the most ingenious plot or incredible acting but it took us somewhere else with its scope and action. Oh and people prasing ILM for the look and feel and trashing Bay is kind of asinine. ILM once again broke new ground and is amazing but that's all at the direction of Bay. He spent years with designers storyboard artists, and previz artists to come up with how they look, move and feel. he also buils some incredible action sequences. ILM does they're thing and makes it real makes us buy it god thier amazing...but the action is his. Like him or not, like the movie or not, what's on the screen is due more to him than anyone else. If the guys eats and sleeps this movie and invests three years of his life to making it and wants to put flames on Optimus so be it. So if you want to sit here and say it could have been this and that until your fingers bleed go ahead. I'm sure I loved transformers more or as much as any of you (had all of the comics too for christ's sake) and I cant wait to see them in reality on the big screen. It was a massive undertaking to make this happen and it looks like a rousing success. It's the first movie and it's like nothing we've ever seen before so just enjoy it you can go hating Bay again if you want after you see it.
I agree, there should be a CARE BEARS MOVIE, DAMMIT!!! by wackybantha	Jun 16th, 2007 11:02:13 AM
GRUMPY BEAR, BABY!!!! OH, YEAH!!!!
Yeah because when people think of Transformers by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:03:56 AM
they think "Gee, I hope this has a love story between two humans in it." This movie has nothing you haven't seen somewhere else. Just shinier effects.
haha by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:04:08 AM
I realize the title had nothing to do with what I was writing I sort of went off on a tangent.
Yes Vern I know you do not like "check your brain" by AllPowerfulWizardOfOz	Jun 16th, 2007 11:05:47 AM
at the door. We established that many TBs ago. It sounds to me from all the reviews so far that this movie is going to be exactly that and give those of us who are excited about it exactly what we want in terms of awesome robot vs robot on the big screen. I am perfectly fine with that I know you are not. It's a shame to because sometimes it feels good to let go and just be that kid again Vern. I am not going to apologize for Bay. Fuck Bay. Fuck all his movies but if there was one movie the guy was born to make it is Transformers because he does do one thing well which is action. I know that you hate his take on that area of film making as well because you said before the action looks to busy and you can't follow what is going on. You want "man in suit" don't you Vern? If I want that I watch old school Godzilla. I won't apologize for it at all. I am stoked. I can't wait. And maybe the reason people are putting up "disclaimers" first before posting on the TBs is because of all the hate that has been spewed out on these TBs in the last year about the movie from a small group of people who can't grasp the reality that this movie and the TV show were based on a toyline. So before they make their review they are sub consciously defensive because they don't want to be attacked for having a good time from watching the movie. You know what Vern I promise you I won't apologize. I am going into this amped and ready to blown away by the action on the scene.
Bay did not spend "years" working on this film. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:06:23 AM
He wasn't even interested in the property until Spielberg approached him.
superninja by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:09:16 AM
yeah really you've seen realistic robots fighting in the real world whth that sort of voracity.Where I would like to see that movie. Is everyone going to enjoy the inner struggle of leadership between Starscream and Megatron if they werent fans of the transformers to begin with. I think my girlfirend my mom and my nephew will have a ball watching this movie and if anyone of us on this site had written it they wouldnt have.
That's called characterization, generally included by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:13:30 AM
in most screenplays. So, of course they could've made an audience interested in the internal politics of the Decepticons. How do you think the property has lasted so long to begin with? People care about the robot characters. I'm not saying the first frame or two of the animation won't be great - undoubtably it will, ILM is awesome, no disputing it. But great effects do not a movie make if you don't care about what is happening.
For example, when you see the first dinosaur scene by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:15:50 AM
in Jurassic Park, you're blown away. By the time you get to the Velocaraptors, you're interested in the characters and Spielberg builds the suspense but your mind has accepted the dinosaur imagery so while it is still cool, it's not the same as the that first scene. Jurassic Park 2 and 3 sucked and no one cares how cool the dinos looked.
supe by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:15:55 AM
Really because its 2007 and they were writing and boarding in 2005...did I say 3 years 2, 2 years. Regardless its a long time and a LOT of work.
He put the same amount of time they do into by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:17:35 AM
any other movie like this during pre-production. You made it sound like he's Stanley Kubrick or something.
Ahhh by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:18:21 AM
yes but first you have to get a large audience to buy the transformers from a human point of view...then the next couple of movies they can reallly get into the characterization of the robots themselves.
Bay came on in 2005, movie started shooting by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:18:28 AM
in 2006. One year, big deal.
Can't help but notice the immediate chilling effect by CreasyBear	Jun 16th, 2007 11:18:37 AM
Memflixgate has on reviewers. As long as they can remain anonymous, they can still offer reviews without fear of reprisal. Then again, neither of these dropped Cleveland Steamers on the movie like Memflix's FF2 review.
Transformers ARE human characters. They just by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:20:57 AM
happen to look like giant robots. For the most part, the G1 designs are structured to look like humans if they were giant robots. That is part of what made them accessible. Bumblebee was the size of a human so that Spike most closely related to him. It was a neat little way to do it, they should've stuck with it and made a real fantasy movie instead of more faux-realism. Bumblebee has a CAR engine - ha ha.
really by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:21:07 AM
oh you dont think shooting editing and post work is done by him as well. Do you think he hands the plates to ILM and says go at it..no any director is involved in every aspect from start 2005 to finish///the last effecs shot and sound.
Yes, that's his job. It's obvious that Bay is not by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:22:38 AM
breaking from his usual stylistic choices and Bay has his team, so again, no big deal.
We would have related to bumblebee in that by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:23:19 AM
way but the masses may not have.
I don't really have anything against Bay. He does by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:24:28 AM
what he does but his work is totally vaccuous and I question anyone who claims they love TF bringing him on to begin with. TF has a rich mythology. It would be like bringing Bay on to do LOTR or something.
Monty, that is just poor reasoning. It was the by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:26:35 AM
masses, or rather a certain % of them that popularized Bumbleebee to begin with, and that was based on his original design. That design was charming and people love it to this day. So now they've completely redesigned him and have turned off some of that original fanbase and are hoping to attract more people that weren't even interested in the concept to begin with.
Its a risk investing this much in the by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:26:59 AM
first movie you have to make sure more people than us are going to see it. If you think making a cop buddy movie and taking on transformers are the same thing in terms of work load then youre nuts.
I don't buy this "wait till the sequels" argument by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 11:28:02 AM
90 minutes is plenty of time to get across all that is needed in terms of plot, characterization and action. Inventive filmmakers with something to say do this all the time. All you need to do is look at movies like DIE HARD, PREDATOR, ALIEN, HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER, RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK, STAR WARS, etc. for perfect examples of this sort of thing. So, wait till the sequels to see if Starscream is anything more than an ape-looking robot that turns into a jet? Wait till the sequels to see the ages-long rivalry betweeen Megatron and Optimus Prime? Shit, the 30 minute long cartoon got more plot and characterization across than it appears this movie gets done. Blech. Filmmakers that stretch out their story length unnecessarily show that they are lazy. Case in point- Spiderman 3 was waaaay too long. And if that story was tightened up better, the missteps that took place would have been resolved. It's one thing for a movie to be part of a larger series (such as Harry Potter or LOTR) but why oh why must everything under the sun be made for an eventual sequel or trilogy???
Of course they're not. Where did you get that idea? by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:29:13 AM
Should they have completely redesigned Spider-Man and changed his origin so that a new audience would like him?
This is the only Hollywood movie... by kafka07	Jun 16th, 2007 11:29:19 AM
...that I am seeing this summer. I don't count Spiderman 3 because it was a turd, not a movie. At least there's next summer.
Lotr by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:30:07 AM
Transformers is not the same thing as LOTR . Its a literary property..much more people have read lord of the rings then who know what transformers are. Not to mention Lotr was based around humanoid character which the mainstream can relate to a lot more. sorry about the nuts comment
I don't have a problem with tent-pole franchises by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:31:45 AM
but you're right Yack it seems it's gotten to the point where you are expected to not evaluate each installment on its own merits as a film.
Spiderman lotr batman by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:31:52 AM
were all around for generations...Transformers was a 6 year window in the eightees for the most part.
No, TF has been going from the 80s until now. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:32:28 AM
It has an enormous fan following.
Monty, you're an anti-bot-ite by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 11:33:26 AM
Robots have rights too!
TF is not the same thing as LOTR. Yes, I know. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:33:35 AM
What I am saying is that they are the same type of story, the war epic. Bay's last brilliant war epic was the underrated Pearl Harbor, no?
Redesigned, yes, but I never recall them by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:36:14 AM
looking like reverse-engineered walking junkpiles. Why would alien beings look like reverse-engineered vehicles built by humans? The easiest way to cheat this is to make them look humanoid and have the tranformations look cool and just don't explain it. They're aliens, this is not a biology class. Instead you have Meghan Fox commenting on what a powerful engine Bumblebee has so Bay can make a cheap sex joke.
Will become totally forgettable by UMAGA	Jun 16th, 2007 11:36:38 AM
Sure, it'll probably do good in the theaters and on DVD. But after all the hype, people are quickly going to realize that there's nothing more to this then a bunch of special effects.
Monty 16.... hate to break it to you, TF been around... by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 11:37:39 AM
for 20+ years non-stop on television. The original cartoon lasted for 4 years, then they re-edited the cartoon for two years, then Beast Wars came out, followed by Robots In Disguise, Armada, Energon, Cybertron, and soon: Transformer: Heroes in the fall... complete with merchandise. Transformers crosses the generational gap just as easily as a guy dressed in webbed spandex.
The following they have now by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:37:40 AM
is a lot smaller than it was during its hay day most kids don't know what they are. .. Yack I have my Optimus anniversay edition in a small cage, I deny hiom sunlight and dont let him play with the other toys.
Mike Bay lays waste to good concepts by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 11:39:50 AM
That's his way of showing us that he's more powerful. THE ISLAND, ARMAGEDDON, PEARL HARBOR and TRANSFORMERS are great concepts- there are lots of interesting ways to go about those stories. And each time out, he goes and drags the material down to its most silly and annoying levels. He is the worst kind of filmmker around.
spidey TF by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:41:10 AM
when we were kids transformers/gI joe werre the biggest things..for the last 15 years transformers has been around but its hasnt hel the prominence it one did..I know we live in our world ..but as a whole even before the first spiderman movie if you asked 100 people on the street to describe spiderman I think they all could...how many would know the transformers...
"Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" by YackBacker	Jun 16th, 2007 11:41:29 AM
Don't you forget that, Monty. Optimus shall break free from the chains of his oppressor (that being you!).
Just about everyone I know is aware of who by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:43:09 AM
the TF are, even if they don't know the details. Prior to this movie's release.
go ask your dad by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:44:24 AM
,your boss, your kid sister and your aunt about Beast Wars Armada, Energon, Cybertron, The Headmasters, TF:Victory, Super God MasterForce, Beast Machines...then ask him about spiderman
Transformers following today is bigger than 1984. by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 11:45:25 AM
Back in 1984, you had only kids wanting a few dozen toys, reading a hugely successful comicbook, and watching a poorly animated cartoon. Now adults are collecting them too. Today, you have entire conventions based solely on Transformers. You have Generation 1 purists, Beast Wars fans, and general fans that enjoy the nostalgia, but are not militant in defining Prime as only a cab-over-engine. Add to that the modern generation of kids, and you have a huge fanbase that knows every intimate detail of each incarnation of the characters.
Give Michael Bay the Smurfs or the Care Bears. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:46:14 AM
That way his filmmaking style will both be appropriate but laced with irony. Then he can make a family film but only "edgier than usual".
Hefty Smurf can have tribal tattoos and have his by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:47:44 AM
own Aerosmith song.
is supergod masterforce real? by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:48:05 AM
yeah the people we know..were here on the internet its a beautiful saturday..which I am going to force myself to go outside and enjoy riight now...of course the people we know know transformers...but what about everyone else. there are people who dont go on the net, who dont have cell phones..who dont own microwaves, people who dont have i pods or fax machines or electricity what about them.
If you go read the Wiki article about early production by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:48:28 AM
on this some of the comments by the filmmakers show just how much they don't get the concept.
Monty... ask your boss what happened... by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 11:52:00 AM
in Amazing Spider-Man #300. He won't know. Ask your significant other what impact the Amazing Spider-Man Annual #1 has had on the Spider-Man creative teams over the years. They won't know. But they will recognize Spidey if shown a pic. Same thing with Transformers. Ask them details on the cartoons, they'll look at you oddly. Show them a pic of Optimus Prime, and 99% will beam a smile and say "that's the leader from that cartoon I used to watch as a kid!" The nostalgia is there. The fanbase is there. Question is: is Michael Bay there?
oh... and and I don't consider the Japanese cartoons. by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 11:55:16 AM
Headmasters, Victory, Masterforce, etc were Japanese cartoons that will never see the light of day in the US, therefore I didn't see the point in mentioning them in my cartoon continuity, since most westerners don't know about them. Beast Machines I didn't mention exactly because I consider it an extention of Beast Wars.
wow it is real...how would this have fared by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 11:55:21 AM
19 year-old truck driver from Nagano, Japan who moved to America. When the truck's cab is combined with its trailer, he becomes Super Ginrai. A drone named Godbomber is later built, and transforms into a tandem trailer. When Super Ginrai combines with Godbomber, the end result is God Ginrai. He commands the power of fire, exemplified through his assorted "Fire Guts" attacks. Although the mold is that of Powermaster Optimus Prime, released in the U.S, Ginrai is portrayed as an entirely new character. Peace...enjoy the movie all.... I know you will see it........
Bay can't ruin your childhood treasure. All of by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 11:56:49 AM
that stuff still exists. He can only ruin TF going forward and for another generation.
Thylacine by Howling_Fantods	Jun 16th, 2007 11:58:24 AM
There weren't enough women in this movie to say it was loaded w/ female stereotypes, but I'm not absolving Bay. He did, however, load his movie with horrible african american stereotypes. There's a point where the FBI raids Anthony Anderson's house, he squeals, the family scatters, and suddenly it becomes like an episode of cops. His brother actually jumps through a sliding glass window & this is all supposed to be for comic effect. And it isn't funny. They may as well have said, "Oh lawdy, feets don' fail me now."
GurzEon... Some involved saw more than just money... by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 11:58:42 AM
The script writers, and many of the artists and CG designers are genuine TF fans and helped keep some of the core ideas in the movie. Bay and Don Murphy just had no clue what they held in their hands.
web by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:00:13 PM
spiderman was around since the 50s ..everyone knows him...show a 15 year old a pic of optimus before the movie. The only people who really knew optimus when they were growing up is us...and they killed him..damn that sucked GurzEon ...a lot of people who worked on this film love the transformers..
As much as I am enjoying this back and forth by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 12:00:57 PM
The simple fact is they wrote a film aimed solely at ten year old boys based solely on a toy. They looked no further than those two simple concepts. There is so much more they could have taken into account and cultivated a script from. Instead we get the lowest common denominator movie of the year. Loud, Flashy, Stupid and Incomprehensible (evidently proven by every review we have read). Potential is there for some great, smart, topical, allegorical, accessible by all ages Sci-Fi. Hey, at least it got made, right? I cannot believe how low the expectations of the masses are. What the fuck happened to cinema? And I get called a pretentious, elitist, snob because I prefer films made outside the U.S. I like to be entertained, not pandered to and insulted. Wake up and stop supporting mediocre cinema. Speak with your wallets. I would rather go outside and enjoy the day with my kid, which I will after she finishes lunch, than spend 140 minutes watching TINO.
The screenwriters are not genuine TF fans they by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:01:08 PM
are opportunists. Kurtzman polled the fans at Murphy's blog for story ideas. That is not the exactly the height of creativity.
Howling, that was one of the more embrassing by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:02:14 PM
things about the TF draft script. I am by no means PC, but it was just glaringly awful.
GurzEon, you don't have to watch japanese cartoons by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 12:03:05 PM
I've seen 1... ONE... episode of Headmasters... and yet I was and still am a huge TF fan. I have a wall... yes... WALL of Optimus Prime merchandise including all the Prime toys from Gen 1 up to movie Leader Class Prime. I've read the comics, watched american TV, and my wife rolls her eyes at me as I try to pass the torch to my two year old son by buying him the Softimus Prime plushie and Optimash Prime Potato Head.
And as pretty as Meghan Fox is, the scene with by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:04:17 PM
her being oogled by Shia while looking under the hood as they exchanged lame sexual innuendos disappointed me. I know it's a Mike Bay film, but she looks slutty, and this is supposed to be his family film.
HeWhoCannotBeNamed by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:07:39 PM
Hey I'm a student of film as well I love to have my life changed by a movie and my perceptions altered and awakend. That was never and will never be transformers..there are too many people to please its just the way it is...
All of the people that love this film are way more by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:07:43 PM
defensive than the people who don't like it. I suspect because they know it's $hit and still want to like it. Kind of desperate.
Why should TF be more than a toy commerical? by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 12:10:55 PM
That's all the cartoons & comics were. That's all modern cinema been since Star Wars. Commercials to sell toys, merchandise, or the latest car or othe gadget. Matrix sold Nokia phones and sunglasses. James Bond sold BMWs, watches, and suits. Produce placement is huge. That's what Hollywood does because they don't get much $ from the movie in the long run, but from the merchandise. I worked at Best Buy when Jurassic Park: Lost World came out. Tons of people were coming in asking for the pocket-sized JVC camcorder used in the movie, even tho it was only seen in one shot.
desparate by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:11:09 PM
Hah. Im just trying to rely to you how hard it was to try and please everyone to make this movie. Its already going to be a huge success.I honestly dont think you seeing it or not is going to make a dent.
Gurz by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:12:47 PM
wait I forget...is transformers church on sunday or saturday...Im not missing it am I ..I have much to thank alpha trion for,
Also, Spidey debut was 1963... not the '50s. by W3bzpinn3r	Jun 16th, 2007 12:12:50 PM
Sorry, just had to correct ya.
bay is ruining childhoods? by Bouncy X	Jun 16th, 2007 12:12:58 PM
wow, did he go back in time and ruins yours? because mine is still intact in my memories. people should stop with the melodrama already. but its funny for all these people claiming the movie will suck and is insulting etc... they sure do keep on reading and posting in these talkbacks. color me crazy but if i was this against the movie, i would have stopped reading or caring about it over a year ago. its funny to see the hypocrites here. and the whole "true fan" arguement is so old. why's it so hard to understand the concept of opinion? your opinion isnt a fact, it doesn't reflect anyone but yourself, stop trying to act like what you say is facts shared by the world. i mean really, you hardcore movie/comic geeks lead such small internal lives. and this whole "transformers has a rich mythology" argument is pointless. however far removed this movie is, its based on the G1 cartoon and nothing else. i dont care how "deep" the comics were or how rich the other series were in your heads. this is loosely based on G1 and nothing else. i mean why else do you think every autobot is and 4 of the 8 decepticons are G1 characters? so before whining again about the rich mythology, stop and realize its based on the 1980s cartoon which was nothing but ur typical 80s cartoon with good guys fighting bad guys. and i issue a challenger for the ones not happy, when you see the movie, if it ends up sucking for you, i dare you to NOT come here bragging "i was right blah blah blah" i dare you to just smile and realize ur opinion is right to you and live your life. nobody will actually do this, because the week this opens, people will come here and do it anyway but yeah.
its ok I get caught exaggerating by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:14:10 PM
a lot.
I wan't talking about whether or not it will make by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:14:42 PM
money. Could care less, really. It probably will make a lot of money.
They don't just appologize, they justify and insult by INWOsuxRED	Jun 16th, 2007 12:14:46 PM
for no real reason. Why are the reviews still a laundry list of complaints followed by "This had to be directed by Bay or else you'd prefer Ang Lee's Hulk" or "If you don't like this you want Megatron to shrink into a gun and that would be stupid". All the positive reviews also seem to compare it to Jurassic Park, which was also terrible in just about every way I think Transformers will be terrible. At this point we know anyone who puts out a negative review will be hunted down by the studio anyways.
This will make money by Colonel Activity	Jun 16th, 2007 12:16:13 PM
but it will also eat man-bag, alot like other Bay movies. I read the script, and it's awful. Also, Shia fucks cats.
Star Wars had plot and character. You sell more by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:16:34 PM
toys if people buy into the mythology - that's the bottom line. TF then on to the next thing, the toys so ugly. They could've made even more money if they had done this right.
there is no fact in movies, only opinons by Bouncy X	Jun 16th, 2007 12:18:15 PM
i realize its a hard concept for you kids to realize but yeah. all the movies you think are good, others will think they;'re bad and vice versa. nobody is wrong, nobody is right, its an opinion. i know i know...hurts your noggin to understand that.
no supe its a success by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:18:40 PM
I didnt say money.it brought transformers to the real world. its going to successfully introduce entire new generations to Optimus Prime..not monkey optimus..or all of the new fake optimuses but the cullen optimus..and maybe the next few films will be more of what you want..but its a success none the less.
The same people who say it's just a cartoon.. by UMAGA	Jun 16th, 2007 12:19:24 PM
Are probably the same people crying over Batman's Robocop-like look or the color of Superman's outfit. Shut the fuck up.
well agree to disagree by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:21:50 PM
but Im right..just kidding enjoy the film ..dont forget the buttered popcorn.
"haters" and "apologists" by Bouncy X	Jun 16th, 2007 12:23:32 PM
more terms from people who dont understand the concept of opinion. believe it or not, some people will like the things you hate, and some people will hate the things you like. they arent "haters" or "apologists" they just have a different opinion. i know i know, its making your ears smoke understanding this but such is life my children.
Childhoods by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 12:29:45 PM
Never understood that arguement. Mine is in the past. No one can retroactively ruin it or rape it or whatever. I believe/hope people just type that as a joke. TINO isn't even based on the cartoon. It's based solely on the toy line. Look at the credits on the poster and in the trailers. Based on the toy. They looked no further than the prospect of beginning a new toyline. Hasbro should have demanded more. Bungie demanded more regarding the Halo movie and hence it is in limbo now. Competently make it right or not at all. Could have been, should have been, blah blah blah..... Monty 16 I am one of the few not paying to see this. I will never see this just like X3, SR, SM3, GR, FF, FF2, DD, etc. etc. And it won't make a difference at all. I still love the property and still love talking about it.
Your funny Gurz by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:31:51 PM
I love your spunk
Hey, if you end up enjoying it, who am I to say? by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:33:11 PM
Just don't make a big deal out of me not agreeing. I want more out of my films in general. There is a place to have big summer movies with great special effects and great story and characters. I just think we have accepted mediocrity and its to a point that these movies feel insulting.
are you guys really not going to see it by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:34:40 PM
good for you. at least you stick to your guns gotta respect that. all jokes and back and forth aside well talk after it comes out...but if you dont see it how will you trash it
My mom likes to check her brain at the door. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:35:25 PM
She doesn't want to think about movies, she just wants to enjoy them. I don't think my mom is dumb, but I say: why not make a movie that is enjoyable AND gives you something to think about? It's not a negative, it's a positive. Of course no one wants an art house TF, but the property is rife to talk about topical things and it seems a waste to drop all of that in favor of what they've done here.
I'm not going to see it. If someone who read the by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:38:38 PM
script comes back from seeing it and say that it was able to overcome the crappiness of the script, then I might consider it. But you have to also remember that Murphy has acted like a real tool and I kind of don't want to help pay him for that.
UMAGA by Giant Ape Balls	Jun 16th, 2007 12:42:21 PM
I don't really understand this geek snobbery. A cartoon is easily dismissed as a trivial thing whilst childrens comics are apparantly revered as the holy fucking grail. The disappointment at this from my opinion is that you know it could have been so much better. I'm sure the effects and action scenes will be exceptional, but with a thoughtful script rather than a by the numbers trashy script, this could be so much better. THAT is where my disappointment lies.
I actually agree with you on that supe by Monty 16	Jun 16th, 2007 12:42:40 PM
..if you look effects films that were bashed for having no premise or story a few years ago ...they look downright complex compared to what were given today no doubt. Expectations have been lowerd..however this is the first film of its kind. The story in Star wars wasnt amazing...but it took us to a new believable word and we fell in love with the characters..will that happen here who knows..You or I havent seen the finished product.
I am getting tired of the by lionbiu	Jun 16th, 2007 12:45:57 PM
I am getting tired of the lables too 'haters' and 'apologists' is getting used far too often. The reason I dont want to see this film is because it sounds awful...every review reads like a apology rather than a endorsement.
20 foot robot is something you've never seen. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:46:19 PM
Except, there are no 20 foot robots, it's CGI and everyone knows this. As much as I hate Jar Jar, you at least could say Lucas was going for an actual character. Not sure you can say the same here. There are 11 human characters given screentime and loose development in this movie. There are 13 robots. Who do you bet is getting the short shrift here? Instead of crafting characters they overanimated them to distract you.
The story in Star Wars IS amazing. So are the by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:47:42 PM
characters. They archtypes, they're not overly complicated, but being simple is not the same as being stupid.
A brief message for the Bay-baiting haters by thegreatwhatzit	Jun 16th, 2007 12:48:50 PM
Count me in. This movie is a toy commercial (PIRATES merchandise is already discounted. TRANSFORMERS commerce has inundated regional toy stores, a trend that retailers are confident will be sustained through Christmas). My favorite robot remains Robby (FORBIDDEN PLANET); "he" had personality and was spawned from a script that invoked "The Tempest". The TRANSFORMERS script appears to have been drafted on the back of a Burger King place mat.
Raiders of the Lost Ark by Bubba Gillman	Jun 16th, 2007 12:51:54 PM
...was a summer flick. Jaws was a summer flick. The Empire Strikes Back was a summer flick. There's no reason that a "summer flick" can't have a good story.
Exactly! The Raiders script is just so good. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 12:58:23 PM
If people want to copy something, copy that script. Sheesh.
Making the movie accessible? by Magpye	Jun 16th, 2007 12:59:17 PM
I notice that one of the talkbacker's above stated that the reason for the changes is to make the movie accessible to everyone...from the sound of the reviews, no one has any idea of what's going on in the movie anyway, so how is that accessible? I totally agree that some changes for film are necessary, and if I were directing, I too would have cut out a lot of characters for practical reasons. However, one of the challenges I would have embraced would be making the robots 'real-life characters with actual personalities.' I also agree with the changes to many of the robot's vehicle modes...especially Ratchet. Even though the premise is Robots in Disguise, it's still nice to be able to visually distinguish the TF vehicles from ordinary cars during fast-paced chase scenes. However, I don't agree with the flames on Optimus or the fact that Bumblebee is a muscle car. These things go against the established personalities of the characters, especially in the fact that Bumblebee is the weakest of all the TF's. A camaro really doesn't say 'weak' to me. As for having the established fan-base of Spider-Man or Batman, well, there's almost 3 decades of material for the Transformers now, so I'd call that pretty established. It's also pointless to compare the average joe's familiarity with Spider-Man compared to TF because even Raimi encountered this problem when choosing villains for the SM movies (he wanted classic villains like Scorpion, Rhino, Electro etc) but the exec's didn't think the public would know them. It's interesting to point out however, that Batman Begins had Ras Al Ghul (sp?) and Scarecrow which were hardly household names, yet somehow, the average viewer was still able to follow that film...amazing, huh? Ok, I'm going all over the place now, but the point I'm trying to make is that, if you have a good story, interesting characters, and a fun plot, the audience will be with you all the way even if there's zero familiarity with the backstory or history of the franchise. And for the love of god, will the real haters (ie. the blind faith idiots) stop bringing up the cartoon and movie as the be all, end all of TF cannon. There's a tonne of good material out there to pick from, so stop clinging to that as some sort of validation as to why the new movie is 'cool as balls'.
Boo hoo... by Fenton Meiks	Jun 16th, 2007 01:02:01 PM
"...I'm not going to watch this because they have the cheek to try and sell merchandise on the back of the film. Bad, nasty, smelly film company people." Always amuses me when you hear people whining about merchandising. Like a film shouldn't be used to advertise other products and vice versa. These same arseholes then happily swan about the streets like a walking Gap advert, in their Nike trainers, ray-bans, and ipods. Bawbags.
Magpye by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 01:02:19 PM
right on
It's a Hasbro movie by HeWhoCannotBeNamed	Jun 16th, 2007 01:06:57 PM
Advertising is a given. How else are they going to make money? But that's just it, they are only, only, only interested in money. Not the craft. ILM clearly excels at their craft. Bay clearly does not. Clearly to me that is. How about a story that's not beyond insulting? Kids films can be enjoyable by those other than the 10 year old domographic. Too much to envision for these filmmakers obviously. Insulting on many levels.
Jesus Christ... I'm sick of Saying This.... by Pawprint	Jun 16th, 2007 01:09:38 PM
Whoever actually expected a densely plotted and richly characterised film based on a fucking 80's kid's cartoon just needs a slap. The cartoons were just cartoons; TF's stablemates were CareBears and My Little Pony. Is some frothing-at-the-mouth G1 wanker going to try and tell me that either of those cartoons was the deeply moving and involving experience they seem to think the TF's cartoon was? No, didn't fucking think so. TF's, CareBears and My Little Pony cartoons were there to sell toys. Shit bust. This film is here to make money, kick arse and entertain. Not one reviewer has come away from this film less than entertained. Now, I don't know about you, but that's all I want from a film when I hand over my money. Stop trying to kid yourselves and others that the TF's cartoon was fucking high-brow, intricately plotted, serious programming for kids, because it wasn't. It was a badly-animated, silly, derivative extended toy commericial. Now, 'haters' - fuck off, and close the door behind you. Your time is over.
BLESS YOU MICHAEL BAY!!!! by TheGhostWhoLurks	Jun 16th, 2007 01:14:08 PM
That's right... I said it. Comic book movies should be about ACTION above all else.
Fenton Meiks by TinSpider	Jun 16th, 2007 01:20:36 PM
I'm part of the anti-merchandise crowd and I can honestly say I don't own nike trainers, ray bands or a fucking ipod just out of principle. Twat.
Pawprint by Giant Ape Balls	Jun 16th, 2007 01:20:39 PM
You're right, the cartoons were distinctly average. However, the comic (which is so revered by the geeks, especially on this website) was very good. It did have a certain depth and better characterisation so it's disappointing that the script isso poor. If you're happy with bright shiny lights and effects then bully for you. Personally, I want a litle more from a film.
Pawprint by tile_mcgillus	Jun 16th, 2007 01:20:41 PM
Think about what you just said. "Whoever actually expected a densely plotted and richly characterised film based on a fucking 80's kid's cartoon just needs a slap." Seriously? Because we expect a quality movie, we are assholes. Jesus christ man. God forbid someone hope for something other than shit. If you wanna live in lowered - expectationville be my guest. If you wanna shut off and watch the boom boom, go right ahead BUT don't ridicule me for asking for a quality product.
Raiders of the Lost Ark by Magpye	Jun 16th, 2007 01:21:40 PM
It's interesting that everyone keeps bringing up Raiders as a good example of great action merged with great plot...isn't this the film that Bay believed would be a piece of shit when he was working on it? I don't know if it's irony, but I likes it! lol
Pawprint by TinSpider	Jun 16th, 2007 01:23:12 PM
you cum stain. Don't you even read the other posts??
tile_mcgillus... by thegreatwhatzit	Jun 16th, 2007 01:26:20 PM
You're right on the money, man... "The best stupid movie I have seen this summer." Who else but TRANSFORMER addicts would gauge this blurb as a "rave" review?
Tinspider by Fenton Meiks	Jun 16th, 2007 01:26:30 PM
If you genuinely don't own one single branded product, on principle, then you are one of 0.001% of the population who can say that. You also need to get over yourself, you pious wanker.
tile-mcgillus, Giant Ape balls, by Pawprint	Jun 16th, 2007 01:26:35 PM
Right..... so you're expecting something on a par with 'The Usual Suspects' from the up-coming 'Thundercats' film then, eh? If you're feeling ridiculed, then that's your look-out; my post wasn't aimed at anyone by name. If the cap fits... etc I'll be honest and say I have never read TF comics, but Bay's film was supposed to be based on the cartoon wasn't it? Did the comic have robots with beards and pink lady robots too?
TinSpider.... by Pawprint	Jun 16th, 2007 01:27:36 PM
No. Summarise them for me.
tile-mcgillus, Giant Ape balls, by Pawprint	Jun 16th, 2007 01:29:04 PM
Sorry; first comment was for tile, second for Giant Ape Balls...
Watched Transformers the movie by FILMFUNK	Jun 16th, 2007 01:33:09 PM
this afternoon with my kid and we both fell fast asleep! what the hell was Eric Idle doing a voiceover in it for!? load of inpenetrable claptrap with synth rock souncrap!
Pawprint by Giant Ape Balls	Jun 16th, 2007 01:48:31 PM
No I'm not expecting "Usual Suspects", I'm hoping for a great adventure flick. Great action flicks, Die Hard, the aformentioned Raiders Of The Lost Arc, have great scripts. This script reduces the real stars, the robots, to something akin to the toys in small soldiers. I for one can see the reason that they've changed the designs because, quite frankly, the robots would have looked ridiculous if they'd made them like the toys. That however doesn't excuse them for making Megatron look like crumpled tinfoil. And yes , the comics did have pink girlie robots (never got that ) and beardy ones too.But hey, Fantastic Four had a Galacticus, a monstorous being with a love of pink spandex and a purple helmet. The X-mens Wolverine, a luminous yellow get up. Great for sneaking up on the enemy eh?
I'll see it a few weeks into it's run... by Bones	Jun 16th, 2007 01:52:34 PM
I will not see it opening weekend. In fact, maybe I'll wait and see it in second-run at the Dollar Movie Theatre. IT can be up there with other films I waited to see like Star Trek Nemesis and the craptacular Revenge of the Sith...
Shouldn't it be an improvement on the 80s by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 01:55:36 PM
cartoon, then, and not more immature and slack-jawed?
FILMFUNK by Giant Ape Balls	Jun 16th, 2007 01:56:05 PM
The voice cast for it was unbelievable!! Leonard Nemoy as Galvatron. Eric Idle as Wreck Gar. Rather sad though that this was Orson Wells last work. He deserved better.
The only good part of TF: The Movie is the first by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 01:57:32 PM
20 minutes. The attack on Autobot City is great, Prime's death is great. The rest is only fun if you reeeeally like TF.
Superninja.. by Pawprint	Jun 16th, 2007 01:58:28 PM
All of the people that love this film are way more defensive than the people who don't like it. I suspect because they know it's $hit and still want to like it. Kind of desperate. by superninja Jun 16th, 2007 12:07:43 PM What?! Are you taking the piss?! For MONTHS now, ordinary film-geeks like myself have had to put up with fucking miserable fan-boys whining about flames on Michael Bay, lips on Megatron's vagina and all other sorts of inconsequential crap - in addition to judging the film before they have seen it, and acting like superior, sophisticated, smug intelligentsia. Wankers jumping on ANYONE who seemed even remotely optimistic about this film. Now the good reviews are coming in, and YOU'RE talking about desperation? All you sour-faced fucking 'haters' are fucking squirming and grasping at straws now that 3 people have reviewed it and no-one has come away less than entertained, and you're talking about desperation? Face it Superninja, you and your fellow 'haters' have been shown up for the miserable, pedantic and childish stick-in-the-muds you are. You've talked yourselves into corners and are unsure about how to get out without losing face. Don't watch this film if you like being entertained - stay in and watch an arty black & white, subtitled French film instead if you wish to make yourself feel intelligent and superior. Don't bandy terms like 'desperate' around in a last ditch attempt to try and remain aloof and superior, you hypocrite.
Pawprint, you're posing a false argument by Yack Backer	Jun 16th, 2007 01:58:33 PM
Nobody is saying "Give me the Academy Award-Winning TRANSFORMERS, please!" Have you ever seen an action/sci-fi movie that was just well-done? It's the difference between STAR WARS and WING COMMANDER. Get it?
Yackbacker... by Pawprint	Jun 16th, 2007 02:01:00 PM
Have you seen TF's yet? How do you know it's NOT well done? How do you know you WON'T enjoy it?
superninja by Giant Ape Balls	Jun 16th, 2007 02:01:22 PM
Oh come on, I bet there's a little bit of you that loves the end. "Arise Rodimus Prime" and all that. You know you love it.
Hey, thanks for making my point. by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 02:02:10 PM
You have had to put up with us? Too funny.
Fucking moron reviewers. by PwnedByStallone	Jun 16th, 2007 02:03:38 PM
Can we get someone with a BRAIN write a review? For the love of god! This movie sounds like utter shit.
Nah, I don't like Rodimus, the Post Modern by superninja	Jun 16th, 2007 02:03:43 PM
Optimus. Ha hah. Hot Rod is okay, but Rodimus sucks.
Pawprint, I've seen enough to be very concerned by Yack Backer	Jun 16th, 2007 02:04:34 PM<

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