I was looking forward to this as I actually liked the first one. but you cursed it with your negative/positive good/rubbish reverse reviewing style!

Oh well never mind.

I am seeing this film tonight and am a giant heap of stinking excitement right now. It's stupid, I know, but what's a guy going to do? Fantastic Four! Bloke who surfs in space and is silver! Alba! Ludicrosity!!!

Let's talk about Fantastic Four instead! Wasn't it great?

Three of the Fantastic Four persuade Jessica Alba to strip naked and become invisible so they can make their way through a crowd of people. How this transparent nudity will help is never made clear. Alba shoves her way through the crowd in much the same way she would have if she were visible, and she arrives at the front to discover - the other three are already there! Nobody laughs like it was a practical joke or anything, they just get on with the next story beat. Brilliant! The cherry perked atop this scene is that it is obviously a blatant attempt to show Alba in her undies, and yet the brief shot of the required scantiness has been captured in such a way that you can't really see the goodies!

That is some genius film making right there, and I refuse to believe it happened by accident. Something that dumb can only come about through meticulous, deliberate planning by a group of very clever people, and I salute them.

Now, let's go save some lives!

Seriously, though, this is a Harry review, which doesn't mean all that much outside of Harry's own head, so I'm taking it with a pinch of salt. Nice to see him give it a fair shake, though.

JOBLO Covers it:
http://www.joblo.com/gone-too- far

Do tell.

WHICH ISN'T A GOOD THING.

After 6 months of hearing how painfully lame it was and completely lowering my expectations, I finally said 'sure, I'll see it.' And I thought it was fine cuz it wasn't as bad as I thought. There were some horribly wrong filmmaking choices that were made, but instead of feeling indignant at the lack of competency, I just laughed. I had "Fun," or turned a blind-eye, if you will.

I don't want to have to lower my expectations for a movie that I really want to see. Why can't the right people make these movies?

Harry, often contradicting himself, will separate book from film. It shows the movie GRACE when viewers should not have to be gracious in the first place. It is a testament to the film's weakness and failures, if a viewer is going to first have to have a forgiving mindset before entering the theater.

IT'S A BUNCH OF CRAP.

Make a good movie!

All hail the Fantastic Four, finally available in film form!

If you love FF so much, your standards should be higher.

So I'm sorry Harry...but you're wrong and Galactus is in the film but he's seriously fucked up.

ANd for the record...Harry I'm sure you'll agree...the cartoon version from the 90's was awesome...THAT's the best adaptation of the Galactus story that's been done...so forget the movie guys and go watch the cartoon.

Let me know.

Anyways...any response to me posting my own outline? It's not finished, have to work out some of the personal relationships and character development, but the basic story is there.

And there are a few things taken from the movie, for conveniences sake more than anything.

Fantastic Four: The Coming of Galactus.

It starts with a voice over from the Watcher...a prologue that tells the story of the Silver Surfer, how Galactus came to his planet (only his enormous shadow is shown) and how Norrin Rad (sp?) made a deal to save his world, by agreeing to serve Galactus. We then move forward, watching as world after world is destroyed, witnessing the Surfer fly through space, before finally reaching Earth.

Like the movie, the Surfer's presence causes disturbances around the world, the power cosmic releasing Doom from is metal prison, prompting the military to intervene and attack the Surfer. Their efforts prove pointless however and the Surfer defeats them easily.

Meanwhile, Reed Richards is monitoring deep space telescopes, noting that a strange force with an cosmic energy reading that's off the scale is headed towards Earth, while Doom is tracking the Surfer.

Ben is planning to propose to Alicia, while Johnny is dating a former colleague at NASA, called Frankie Raye.

When the Surfer arrives in New York, he ends up in a battle with the Four and during the battle, the Surfer notices a strange figure on a rooftop, watching the battle (later revealed as the Watcher - in human form). Of course the Four are beaten badly and the Surfer goes into space, sending out an energy pulse from his board to signal Galactus.

Doctor Doom, in his castle at Latveria, uses a device, similar to the cosmic storm generator of the first film, to draw the Surfer to him (the Surfer senses the cosmic energy, which is similar to his own power) and manages to steal the board from the Surfer, gaining his powers.

The Fantastic Four, having followed the Surfer, encounter Doom, who is practically invincible, thanks to the power cosmic. After a hectic battle with doom, again they lose and Doom begins a rampage across the planet, trying to force the world's leaders to hand power over to him.

The Fantastic Four meanwhile, rescue the Surfer from the Dungeon in Dooms castle and the Surfer explains his presence on Earth, much to the horror of the Four. (it should be noted that the Watcher is present at many of the events going on in the movie, watching from afar).

The Surfer agrees to help fight Doom but says he cannot stop Galactus and that they should treasure the little time they have left, and so, with the Surfer, the Fantastic Four travel back to New York to try to find a way to stop Doom, who just happens to be going to the UN to declare himself absolute ruler of the planet.

It is then that the Surfer sees the Watcher, thinking that the stranger is familiar. The Watcher, who makes himself known explains that he was present when the Surfer made his deal with Galactus, but the Surfer has no memory of his past. The Watcher then places his hand on the Surfers forehead, restoring his memories, and we see flashes of Norrin Rad's life.

But even after getting his memories back, the Surfer says he can't defy his master and that it's pointless to even try and the Watcher says he cannot interfere with the events that are transpiring.

So, the Watcher and Surfer can only stand and watch as the Four try to take on Doom one more. They last a little longer this time but it's obvious that Doom is far stronger. He begins to build up energy, intent on destroying the Four, and New York along with them but as he is about to do so, a great shadow falls across the city, storm clouds begin to appear...Galactus has arrived. Remember the ships from Independence Day? Well Galactus' ship is bigger, and Galactus himself stands on a platform...and yes he's a giant. His booming voice calls for his herald as tentacle like machines from the ship plough into the ground, preparing to absorb the planets energy.

Doom of course is having none of it, and attacks Galactus...bad move. Galactus defeats him easily, taking the power cosmic from him and giving it back to the Surfer.

Initially, the Surfer defends Galactus, but he hears a conversation between Alicia and the Watcher, as she tries to convince him that the human race is worth saving and for proof, he just needs to look at the Four, who fight, despite having no chance of winning.

The Watcher explains that allowing Galactus to die was not a risk he could take even if he wanted to as it could cause the universe to collapse. The Surfer then stops his fight against the Four and suggests that there is one way Galactus may be defeated, deciding to defy his master.

It is decided that the Human Torch would follow the Watcher to the centre of the universe, where all things began and the source of the Power Cosmic. The Torch has to go because he is the only one who can survive within the fires of the universal centre.

The Watcher and Torch then disappear, leaving Reed, Ben and Sue to fight Galactus, joined by the Surfer who turns against his master. But rather than attack him directly, they go for his world-eating machines, trying to slow down their progress and buy time for Johnny.

Meanwhile, Johnny arrives at his destination, surrounded by flame, his body filled with the Power Cosmic.

Tired of his heralds defiance, Galactus attacks the Surfer and the Four, meaning to wipe them from existence, but Johnny returns just in time, and battles Galactus, each strike draining some of Galactus' energy.

Eventually, Galactus falls from his platform, into the river, his body weakened and in need of energy. Just as Johhny is about to deliver the final blow however, The Watcher steps in and stops him, before speaking to Galactus, who recognises him and is surprised that he interfered.

Weakened and dying, Galactus agrees to leave the Earth and never return if they help him. Johnny doesn't trust him, but the Watcher explains that Galactus isn't good or evil...he has no malice, he simply must survive, but when he gives his word, he does not break it and reluctantly, Johnny gives up his newfound power, giving it to Galactus who rises from the river and back to his platform.

Before leaving though, he banishes the Surfer, confining him to this galaxy, stating that he can never explore beyond it, and thus never return home to his own world. Galactus is now in need of a new herald and Frankie steps forward, agreeing to serve Galactus and travel the stars on two conditions. One, that she would only search for worlds without life, and two, that she be allowed to retain her memories.

Galactus agrees and despite Johnny's protests, Galactus gives her the power cosmic and she becomes Nova. Reed tells her that there is a world rich in energy but without life a few lightyears away. but Nova explains that she can already sense the planet, and many beyond it.

As Galactus and Nova depart, Johnny follows, allowing Nova to say goodbye before flying out of the atmosphere, forcing Johnny to stop as his own fire begins to go out in the thin air.

The Surfer departs to explore the galaxy and the Watcher disappears, leaving the Fantastic Four alone on a rooftop with Alicia and Ben planning a double wedding with Reed and Sue. Maybe it sucks...but that's how I think it should have been done. Thee's more too it, but I didn't want to bore you even further.

Most of the stuff I left out has to do with Frankie and Johnny, as well as some Ben and Sue stuff.

As I said, it's not finished, but it's a basic idea of what I think the Galactus FF movie should have been.

Thoughts? Comments? Flames?

Well you may want to change your position on this Harry, because as I mentioned before, Galactus is named in the film...and by the Surfer no less.

The Surfer says, while speaking with Sue in the military base, that the people of his world called the being "GALACTUS", so yes, it is Galactus who appears in the movie.

So, I suggest you redo your review Harry, you may still like the same things, but Galactus is officially named in the film by his herald, so the reason for you not being pissed off is non-existent.

I'm sure you just made a mistake and didn't hear the line, but even if the line didn't exist...were you really prepared to say that the Surfer was a herald to a planet-eating being who actually isn't Galactus?

In any case, Galactus was named in the film...are you mad now?

I do think Galactus would be difficult to pull off but it is possible, in fact I have an idea of how to do it.

Istead of using either the cloud or the physical giant, you do both. Galactus descends over New York as the cloud, but whenever he is going to interact with the Four or the Surfer, the particles come together into the shape of the Galactus we all know and then return to full cloud form when he leaves the planet at the end....something like that could have worked.

Well, because nobody ever refers to it as Galactus"

This is from your review...are you suggesting that the Surfer was talking about a different destroyer of worlds?

Because it's made clear that the Surfer serves that cloud thing...and the Surfer says that cloud thing is Galactus.

Seriously Harry...surely you're not saying that the Surfer has two masters who both happen to eat planets and both use him as a herald...one of them being Galactus and the other being "Random Cloud Monster #2".

I'm sorry, but Galactus is referred to, and it is made clear that Cloudicus is supposed to be a version of Galactus. What more do you want? A bumber sticker on Galactus' cloudy head saying "I AM GALACTUS" ???

But while there is evidence to suggest that he may be a studio stooge (and evidence to the contrary as well...not trying to get banned here)but honestly, I don't think that's the case.

I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt...yes, AICN has become more mainstream and a tool for studios to promote their films through talkbacks (what we like to call PLANTS) but I don't think that influence stretches to the staff. Yes, they do remove spy pics when asked, but so do all of the mainstream movie sites.

I don't rate Harry as a reviewer (sorry Harry, your style just doesn't sit well with me) but I don't think he's a movie stooge or a sell-out. I just think that for the most part, his own tastes don't align with everyone elses...in fact apart from X-Men 3, I can't remember a bad review from him in the last few years, but that's not because he's a sellout, I just think he's a geek who loves movies no matter how good are bad they are.

That's not a bad thing in itself, but as a movie reviewer, it doesn't help...I think Harry should take a back seat, run the site but don't review...it's not about credibility, it's about personal taste, and whereas harry tends to love every movie he sees, other reviewers on the site seem more capable of providing more balanced and objective reviews.

I'm not flaming you Harry, I don't think your a sell-out or anything like that, I just think your uber-love for pretty much every movie ever made isn't what people expect or want from a critic.

The easy thing to do would be to slag this film off like everybody else; but Harry goes the other way and endorses it. I'm a bit surprised, but it sounds like Harry is, too.

Summer movies are supposed to be spetacle. Fun. Excitement. Thrills. All that stuff. Whatever you want to call them, you're supposed judge 'em by your gut reaction. Thinking too much can sometimes ruin the experience. Seriously, when's the last time you had an orgasm; and broke it down second by second to decipher exactly how much you enjoyed it? Even if it's a duller one... damn, you were *still* having sex (hopefully with a big-breasted partner)...

Anyway... summer movies are about adrenaline. If FF2 provides the boost for you, so be it. If one of the three-quels gives you the rush so be it. Heck, some people are even enjoying Hostel 2... so be it.

Within the span of a week, two reviews from Harry have reminded me what summer movie season... no, make that Summer Movie Season, is all about. It's meant to be like a really good backyard party... or beach party... or whatever kind of party. Everybody's welcome. Come on in and have a good time, pick your favorite poison and drink your fill. You have whatever you like, we'll have whatever we like, and everybody have a good time. Yeah, not everybody is drinking the same thing; but most people are just really glad to be having a little bit of fun.

The Surfer rocks (until the end), Ben and Johnny are awesome yet again, Reed is passable. My son is speechless. That's all the "good" stuff I can stomach saying as my rant pendeth.

Onto the bad, much of it comes down to bad casting. Julian McMahon makes a great plastic surgeon but a horrible Doom, Alicia blows, and Jessica Alba is absolutely ridiculous as invisible white woman with poster paint blue eyeballs. All of the above is forgiveable if not for the resolution of this sorry tale. **SPOILERS BEYOND**

See the solution to stopping Galactus is for the Silver Surfer to fly up into the cloud and suck all of his energy and then turn it back on him, and the Surfer doesn't even get killed. SWEET right? Wrong! So the Surfer kills Galactus after he lets Galactus murder (at least) 8 other life bearing planets? You have had the power to kill Galactus since you received the Power Cosmic, but instead you participated in the holocaust of (at least) 8 entire worlds? WTF kind of writing is that? I knew we weren't going to get a long backstory on the Ultimate Nullifier, but this resolution is retarded beyond belief. So lazy, totally lacking in imagination. LAME LAME LAME!

On not showing the big, purple guy (who they did NAME in the movie for fuck's sake). I can understand there being difficulty in having Galactus drop out of the sky and land on Earth and making it look convincing, I totally get that. But at the very end, within an enitirely CGI created scene with dust and debris floating about and no reference to reality (such as buildings and such) and no reference for scale, there is absolutely no reason Galactus could not have been shown in bodily form. Hell, how about just his fucking face with the Surfer floating in front of it? Just an absolutely stupid, idiotic choice.

Moriar... uh Inquiring Minds want to know.

**cue vomit noises**

Oh NOez!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE HARRY!?!

I hope I'm wrong.

Watched it, liked the first one, i liked this one better. IT certainly wasn't the shitfest that doomsayer where predicting and yes imho it was better then spidey 3

i agree on the most part with harrys review ( even though i didnt on his spidey 3 review.)

S P O I L E R S

what sucks? 1)reed dancing, the cgi is awful, no reason for that scene whatsoever 2) dr doom, i've had eeough of him already, no more. get another villian 3) jessica albas hiar and contacts, they really are distracting. her hair colourist should be shot. is her blone hair really that iconic? don't women change thier hair colour and colour thier hair differently? ( i forget i'm asking geeks)really a short bob as a brunette would have worked. her contacts are terrible, really should have digitally enhanced them instead.

stupid things. 1) they leave the surfer alone in a room, so sue can speka to him 2) doom doesnt care that galatcus is upon them because of the board, really? galactus destroys the earth, where's he gonna go?

i wnats bothered about seeing galatus, really its impossible to see hi mon the big screen, think about it, his face would be massive and a human to sclae on that would seem ilke an ant. its a totally stupid thing, so yeah he's a cloud, but it doenst distract from the movie.

a lot of money shots were in the trailers. the surfer does a great job. Its a great movie throughly enjoyable as long a s you're not an anal whiny bitch of a fanboy ( and i'm glad i didnt listen to those. do yourself a favour, watch it and enjoy it

roll on transformers

Anyway, the hell if the Dodge thing did make sense. If you recall, the rest of the team didn't want to wear endorsement deals. Besides, the first joke was funny, the overblown Dodge joke was mega-overkill.

However, if you hated the first one, you will probably hate this one, too. It's got much the same sense of humour, the same product placement, and many of the same flaws. I don't know anything about the comics, but I imagine you comic types will be pissed. But then, you comic types get pissed about anything.

at the wedding i was waiting for the line from johnny " but i just hired this tux" instead it was chneged to " but it's dolce ( or something)

I saw this film early yesterday, and actually totally forgot about it later in the day, and now I'm pissed at what the FF Franchise has become the more I think about it. The CGI on Reed looked like it was from 1995. Fox must have provided Harry an in house fluffer for the screener for him to like this drivel. Even my 11 year old, who's read the comics and watched the 1960's cartoons, hated it, and laughed thru most of it.

I guess you liked Battlefield Earth and Wing Commander too.

Anybody who liked this must think Howard the Duck was the greatest Comic adaptation ever filmed.

are fucking crap. Really i've had enough of doom. Klaw, Mole Man or what ever? Come on. Thats the problem here for FF3 lack of a great villian / nemesis

a skrull invasion force would cost huge bucks, but lets face it the only cgi they are paying for now is the torch.

and versatol VISUALLY THE BEST MARVEL MOVIE EVER was spidey 2

Anyway who cares? Fantastic Four sucked in the comics. The only thing Reed Richards ever did that was a dime was helping Peter Parker get rid of the black costume. Oh and the Invisible Girl figure was worth alot of cash back in the early 90s when it first came out. I traded it along with other Toy Biz crap for a sealed Droids A-Wing. Best thing the craptastic four could have ever done for me.

Its the ULTIMATE Nullifier.

Not the universal Nullifier.

Get your Geekism's straight buddy!

Next time therell be a fine...

As for the movie, I thought it was better than the first...it is a solid superhero movie for younger kids, while adults would probably be put off by it. The first third is almost painfully juvenile, but then it settles down. Compared to the first, I think the actors were more comfortable in their parts, so that helps alot.

That said, there's just no way to spin doctor the one true core fact about these films: they're still a HUGE disappointment overall when you simply think about how fucking GREAT a Fantastic Four movie should be, given the sheer wealth of ideas and classic plots and truly iconic imagery that the Lee/Kirby comics put forth.So to that end, I'd love to be under the sheets with Alba for sure...but that still doesn't make up for the fact that now we've gotten TWO FF movies that could have been soooo much more with simply alot more effort put into them.

But, hey, did I mention Jessica Alba is hot? Yessiree!!!

As Warpspasm accurately notes, this is far, far from a SUPERMAN RETURNS type failure. Then again the problem with SUPERMAN RETURNS wasn't that its box office was even bad (in terms of people who went to see it). What sunk SR is they simply spent too damn much making it. Case in point: spending $10 million on a Krypton sequence that wasn't used in the film AND which Singer didn't even want on the DVD as a "deleted scenes" selling point. That was just plain stupid cash burning on Singer's part, and if I was the Warner's brass I'd want to string his balls up just for that alone.

Alas, I did not.

Everyone should go over to Empireonline or Total Film websites, they are real critics, they too had fun and said it was better than the 1st one.

Will I like this film?

Probably not, but I will probably have a bit of fun as I did with the first one.

I just think they should invest a FF film with some of the same emotion and depth they managed to invest into the Incredibles.

But i'm not gona slag Harry just because he didn't say it was the worst film he has ever seen.

A lot of you will do that knowing that you have sat through a lot worse (Batman & Robin?).

A good critic is someone who leaves their ego and bitchiness at the door and tries to see the best in everything he watches.

You people only seem to attack a reviewer if they like a film and NEVER if they are over critical.

Thats just childish.

Like I said (and Harry said) FF should be a million times better but it could be a trillion times worse.

As for the review on the back of the AVP dvd, it's not actually Paul WS Anderson, just Paul Anderson, it's just a coincedence.

Although I did laugh my ass of when I first saw it on my copy. Yes i did buy it, it was cheap, and it is in my list of best movies to fall asleep to. You know them movies which are so dull and predictable but slighty enjoyable, the ultimate cure for insomniacs.

You're also right in that Harry takes his slagging very well, i'm sure he has had many upset times over all the people here but he gets plenty of respect of fellow critics and people in the industry so I'm sure he rises above it all.

Like I have said before, there are a lot of people who cannot look at a film objectively. A film is either 'COMPLEATLY GAY/CRAP/SHIT!' or 'THE BEST FILM EVER!'

There is no accounting for the fact that no film really fits into either of these catagories. You look at user reviews on web sites and people either give 1-2 stars or 9-10 stars for every review they post, it's just lazy critisim and far to easy to dissmiss a film right off.

I say " as a whole," because, yes, the Surfer looked great and there were a few other miniscule elements that were fleetingly interesting. Fishburne's voice was a great choice. The Thing looked decent and is perfectly cast, as is the Torch. And that's about where any praise ends.

The abominable portrayal of "Dr. Doom" alone should render anyone who cares about the subject matter unable to "have a good time" with this movie. One of my favorite comic villains of all-time, reduced to a preening meterosexual pussy with a voice that wouldn't inspire fear in a gagged Gary Coleman. I think Massawyrm said it, and he said it best: "A complete disrespect for these characters and this franchise."

In fact, the movie basically succeeded in making me HATE pretty much every member of the F4. They are TOTALLY unlikeable. I was praying the Surfer would wipe out every one of them early, and we'd get a compassionate cut to black, roll credits. Reed is a complete buffoon, Johnny's narcissism becomes overplayed very quickly to the point of him seeming to be WAYYY too much of a douchebag, Alba looks like one of the Wayans Bros. in "White Chicks" ...just horrible.

The action scenes are the worst I've seen in years. NOTHING stands out here besides the admitteldy well done chase between Surfer and Torch. Other than that, totally uninspired and unimaginative.

Why does the freaking head army dude keep treating the F4 like they are totally useless? What the hell did the Surfer DO at the end to stop Galactus? Who the fuck knows. And GaLACKtus was really one of the biggest movie letdowns ever.

Once again, Hollywood takes incredible source material and turns it into utter helgramite spittle.

I hope this thing tanks and there is not another one made with this cast and this "braintrust." Shit filmmaking at its absolute, unequivocal best. And anyone who can't see that wears his ass for a hat.

http://tinyurl.com/yt5zys

Almost all the things Behemoth wrote in his review are true. But I went into the theater not expecting very much, save for a mindless superhero movie geared for kids. Kinda like the first one. And that's what we got, only this moved faster than the first one. Was it memorable? Hell no. This isn't a thinking person's superhero movie, just popcorn fare

Either way, there is NO WAY in John Goodman's butt cleavage that any artistic portrayal of Galactus could've been worse than this film's vasectomization (yes, I just made that up) of a legendary bad guy.

The voice was just beyond belief bad. And then we also get Doom spewing one liners like, "Why don't we all go for a SPIN!" And yet there are trained chimps passing for humans amongst us who LIKE this and give it a PASS???

Hey, forget the Watcher, forget about whether the story is "faithful" to the original. How about we just START with a well-paced film, how about we just START with getting the right guy and voice to play one of the greatest comic badasses of all time, how about we try to make the audience actually LIKE the heroes. This movie was geared toward the children. Yes, the blessed children. Which is no doubt why trailers for cartoons and the "Underdog" movie prefaced this piece of Rosie dropping.

And yes, Jessica Alba = the long-lost Wayans Brother in White Chicks.

To those who mindlessly support this sloth-fest, I give you the words of the ONLY celluloid villain named Doom who actually ended up kicking ass. First name, "Thulsa." And thus he spake:

"Infidel defilers. They shall all drown in lakes of blood." This, I pray, will be Crom's judgment on all who made the final decisions on this movie, and all who have validated their tom-butchery by daring to give this shank of rump roast a good review.

CROM FROWN UPON YOU ALL!!!!

But they have done so anyway. They've taken source material that's all but guaranteed success, and instead of trying to make really special movies, they've created something that's no more than a calculated marketing investment.

All films are that to some extent, but I just wish that if they're going to be so damned cynical about it, they could leave the really cherished source material alone. They're just cashing in on the imaginations of others, and not living up to its potential.

In other words, they're taking the low road, and every single ticket buyer this weekend is voting for that practice.

What you call 'haters', we call 'people with standards'.

These corporate shills don't care about making something special, and apparently most of the sheep don't care about watching something special. "It wasn't a complete piece of garbage." "It wasn't as bad as getting your taint scraped with sandpaper." Yeah, great reasons to endorse a movie with a history, a legend and a legacy as beloved as this one.

F Youse All.

Plus, there was not one action element in FF2 that even came remotely close to the Superman Saves the Plane section of that movie.

Was Supey Returns a disappointment? Absolutely. But it was a well-intentioned failure. FF2 reeks with an absolute lack of desire to even approach anything resembling a good, let alone great, movie.

Was "old school" Doom an American businessman? Yeah, that change was REALLY necessary. Did "Old School Doom" make witty quips like, "Let's all go for a spin!" Did "Old School Doom" give off the aura of a drag queen or of someone who was about as menacing or intimidating as a Emmanuel Lewis' sack?

You and your ilk's freaking childish labeling of people who don't accept this crap as "haters" or "fanboys." I'm fine with the story veering away from the comic a little if we get a GOOD MOVIE. This was a TURD, wrapped inside a belch, wrapped inside an irritable bowel.

And I love this argument about "Well, if you go to it with no preconceptions, it's not half bad." Yeah, that's great. No preconceptions about a franchise that you loved for decades and that's one of the most well-written and enjoyable examples of comic-dom. Yeah, going to a movie about THAT with no preconceptions. That's a lot of fun.

I didn't want to hate this movie AT ALL. I wanted to like it and hopefully LOVE it. How anyone can accept this kind of garbage as "okay" is just mind-boggling. Fools and harlots, all of you. Go perform anal on yourselves with a Tim Story dildo, you fantastic freaks.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAH

I should say, the only thing this film was missing was some soundtrack music by Joe Satriani, who I feel is partly responsible for the popularity of the Silver Surfer character (wiki "Surfing With the Alien" by Joe Satriani). Everyone who knows Satch and FF knows I'm right. Hell, they should have even had Norrin say he comes from the planet Satriani. That's how much debt Marvel owes the guy.

Silver Surfer dude was fun to watch. Film was so-so, and had the "We can do stupid stuff all we want cuz this is 'only from a comic book', after all" sort of feel to it. Fun, silly little popcorn flick--nothing more.

She is distracting enough for all the RIGHT reasons--no need to mess up her eyes for god's sakes!