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So Is King Leonidas A Snake? Will Gerard Butler ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK?!

Come on Mori... by Boba Fat	Mar 13th, 2007 04:44:34 AM
You know what to think of it. "Another crappy remake" of a much cherished film.
Those are some BIG shoes to fill by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 04:45:55 AM
Very few people own a role like Kurt Russell owns Snake Plissken, so taking over that one will be hard. I don't have a problem with a remake, because I think it's a solid concept that can stand reinterpretation, but I feel for the guy playing Snake. That's like trying to step in as Indiana Jones or something.
Also on the downside by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 04:48:59 AM
I suppose this means there's no chance of the mooted Escape From Earth, which I always hoped Russell and Carpenter would pull off before they got too old.
"I! AM! SNAKE! PLISSKEEEENNN!!!" by DocPazuzu	Mar 13th, 2007 04:51:03 AM
Doesn't really work, does it? All kidding aside, I do like Butler but I cannot possibly convey how much I loathe the idea of an EFNY remake. This TB is going to be brutal...
Cue... by DocPazuzu	Mar 13th, 2007 04:54:46 AM
...a host of previously unheard of talkbackers saying: "No, srsly dudes, let's give this a shot -- it sounds really cool!"
Why bother with a remake... by kingrobot	Mar 13th, 2007 04:55:40 AM
Does Escape From New York actually need a remake? The action was decent, the effects were decent and the performances memorable. It still stands up as a rip-roaring action movie today.
No, No, No, No, No. by Azazyel	Mar 13th, 2007 04:57:16 AM
Gerard Butler is a great actor, but a remake just isn't needed. New stories maybe, but with Metal Gear Solid in the works, would it be enough anyway?
Kingrobot by Boba Fat	Mar 13th, 2007 04:57:38 AM
And Carpenters score was one of his best. They'll get Rob Zombie to do the new one
At least they are remaking a crappy movie this time by Rupee88	Mar 13th, 2007 04:57:55 AM
The original was too campy and rather worthless. So maybe they can take the same basic premise and make something entertaining with it.
I HEARD HE WAS DEAD! by marathonman2	Mar 13th, 2007 05:00:07 AM
Assault on Presinct 13? The Fog? Halloween? The Thing?... Now Escape? These films were perfect to start with! Why noy try remaking some of Carpenters lesser classics and leave these masterpieces unsoilled?
Could go either way by Gwai Lo	Mar 13th, 2007 05:02:54 AM
I don't think the original is perfect (still love it) and don't think Gerard Butler is at Kurt Russell levels of badassery yet (he was still great as Leonidas). This could go either way. I am a little bit tired of all these films being remade, and agree with the poster that said they'd rather see Escape From Earth. Even though chances are that movie doesn't have a great chance of success what with Carpenter's recent track record and Russell's age.
Escape from Remakes by Captain RawBeard	Mar 13th, 2007 05:12:39 AM
Why dont they just make the 3rd Film - I know Kurt Russell is getting on a bit but he still would be good as an aging grey haired Snake Plisskin. Instead of remaking The Thing they do a sequel instead of tarnishing the original.
Oh come on... by fanboy71	Mar 13th, 2007 05:13:22 AM
Russel was flabby and exceptionally un-soldier-like in the original. I'd like to see EFNY remade. Maybe this time Snake can be the bad ass he was talked up to be the first time around.
Moritz is a worry by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 05:21:12 AM
As I said before, I am cautiously optimistic about a remake. That said, this Moritz guy churns out garbage like nobodies business. SWAT, XXX, Stealth, 2 Fast 2 Furious, Torque, The Skulls, etc. The best this guy's ever done is enjoyable garbage, which doesn't seem like a good fit for an Escape remake. Still, I suppose we should be grateful he hasn't cast Paul Walker as Snake Plissken.
One the one hand, FUCK NO!!! On the other... by SherlockMonk	Mar 13th, 2007 05:21:21 AM
I can see some great possibilities.
"Socko bow"!!! What the fuck is a socko bow???? by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 05:26:44 AM
Seriously, Variety needs to get a new thesaurus. It's like a teen girls club, coming up with secret words like 'skein'! As for another bloody remake, all of the Carpenter inspired ones are awful (with the possible exception of AoP13). And with Neal Moritz involved.....oh......lord..... .no!
Kurt could still play it - new film, not remake by filmcoyote	Mar 13th, 2007 05:33:18 AM
No, no, no. Butler is okay, nothing special but for one thing Kurt is Snake, plain and simple. You want to remake EFNY then have a new central character. Secondly why remake it? It still stands up today, along with Halloween and The Thing. Now I love The Fog, They Live, Big Trouble in Little China and Assault On Precinct 13 but they haven't dated as well. They are still great but i can see how a different, interesting approach could be made. But they should learn from what's already happened. Assault remake played with the premise, made crucial changes, it wasn't just a straight remake and it worked okay. It wasn't great like the original but it was an okay film. The Fog they went for a straighter remake and it was one of the most painful cinema experiences in recent years. If they want to revisit Snake they should bring back Kurt and JC otherwise leave it alone. Oh, and while it looked awesome on screen 300 was tedious, where was the tension? where was the sense of peril? Wasted opportunity was really looking forward to that.
you gotta be fuckin´ kidding by CuervoJones	Mar 13th, 2007 05:33:27 AM
Producers of Hollywood: Stop remaking Carpenter´s movies and let him direct a western.
Aybody see the French Film District 13? by Boba Fat	Mar 13th, 2007 05:38:19 AM
They did a pretty good version of EFNY though the english dub is laughable. Watch it with subtitles. I've got an idea, why not set the remake in L.A? Think of the possibilities ;)
No no no no no no no... by Sledge Hammer	Mar 13th, 2007 05:42:01 AM
And NO. This is a bad idea any way you cut it. Besides which, we already had a slicked up studio big budget remake, it was called Escape From L.A. No Carpenter, no Russell, no real Snake, and no real point. Give us one final sequel with an aged Russell under the eye patch, or else just leave it be. Crazy idea here, but how about instead of making fucking remakes of all of Carpenter's films before the man is even in the grave, we give him an actual budget and a chance to make an all new film before we've lost the man forever? I'd hate for those Masters Of Horror episodes to be the last things he left us with, that would just be all kinds of wrong.
kurt is not that old by BadMrWonka	Mar 13th, 2007 05:42:43 AM
he's in a new tarantino action film for fuck's sake...at least wait 10 years before you remake it...or how about wait til the film is 40-50 years old, that's the golden number. hell you might make a better film if you're in that area (read: ocean's 11, thomas crown affair).
THIS IS INSANITY! by BannedOnTheRun	Mar 13th, 2007 05:43:50 AM
THIS...IS...HOLLYWOOD!
remakes better than the original? by BadMrWonka	Mar 13th, 2007 05:48:09 AM
it's a good question...how many remakes were actually better than the original? criteria: title does not have to be the same if the film is obviously a remake, but simply having a big connection does not count (la jette and 12 monkeys, would not count, for example...fistfull of dollars and yojimbo, would count). I'll start off with Oceans 11 and Thomas Crown Affair. ocean's, well, because the original is not very good. and thomas crown, because, as much as I love steve mcqueen, the original is SO long and drawn out, the remake has a GREAT soundtrack, fairly interesting heists, and just great nuances. so come on guys...any remakes better than the original?
Worst idea in the history of bad ideas by NachoNegro	Mar 13th, 2007 05:52:35 AM
One question leaps to mind. Why? Kurt Russell is Snake. Snake is Kurt Russell. This is going to be an utter abortion. The fact that Butler is even touching this proves to me he's a buttfaced hack.
By The Way... by TheRealMoriarty	Mar 13th, 2007 05:53:05 AM
I'm not endorsing this idea. I'm just throwing it up there. Frankly, I'm still in shock over (A) not realizing how inevitable this remake was and (B) the fact that it's really happening.
Enough of this bullshit. by Ulysses31	Mar 13th, 2007 05:53:50 AM
Enough of this bullshit. Even the suggestion of a remake turns my stomach. Granted, Carpenter's more recent efforts in film haven't been the best but, in my opinion, without Carpenter and Russell there shouldn't be another Snake Plissken movie. Looking at the stills from Grindhouse, all Kurt needs is an eye-patch and the offer to get back in the saddle.
If they must remake it, then please... by jollysleeve	Mar 13th, 2007 06:05:16 AM
....just have the guy play a different character. Keep the same concept and overall storyline, but just have him play a different character, one who serves the same function that Russell did in the original.
NO MORE FUCKING REMAKES!! SERIOUSLY, ENOUGH!!! by Blarney-Man	Mar 13th, 2007 06:09:15 AM
Jesus Christ, I am so fucking tired of going to see films where I know the story, characters, ending already. I am sick of adaptations, sequels and fucking remakes.
BadMrWonka by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 06:09:56 AM
I'll go with Cronenberg's The Fly, Carpenter's own The Thing, The Departed, possibly Philip Kaufman's version of Invasion Of The Body Snatchers. I would also like to piss off my fellow Englishmen by suggesting The Italian Job, which was really a piece of crap to start with.
BadMrWonka by NachoNegro	Mar 13th, 2007 06:10:42 AM
There are very few films in that list. The only example I can think of, of a remake that was demonstratably better than the original in every way, was 'The Thing', by none other than Carpenter himself. Carpenter made another good remake - Assault On Precinct 13. Great film - but whether it was better than Rio Bravo is arguable. However The Thing is a slam dunk.
Fuck! Kurt Russell would still be bad ass! by Dr_Zoidberg	Mar 13th, 2007 06:14:42 AM
So why bother recasting? Sucks the shit all these remakes of films I saw as a kid growing up, makes me feel old. Fucking no originality.
Also, don't forget Heat by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 06:15:06 AM
Michael Mann remaking himself. No remakes means no Heat, which would be a very bad thing.
Hey, Scarface! by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 06:17:55 AM
Okay, I'll stop now.
Better remakes... by Sledge Hammer	Mar 13th, 2007 06:25:52 AM
The Thing. The Fly. Scarface. Heat. Casino Royale. Ben-Hur. The Bourne Identity. Yep, that's about it methinks. I mean there are quite a few films that I would consider quite worthy remakes, without being necessarily out and out "better" than the originals - War Of The Worlds, Cape Fear, Dawn Of The Dead, Assault On Precinct 13, The Magnificent 7, A Fistful Of Dollars, The Thomas Crown Affair, The Departed, The Manchurian Candidate, Invasion Of The Body Snatchers, 1984, The Quiet American, Sorcerer, (the Vincent Price) House Of Wax, Insomnia, Payback, Vanilla Sky, Man On Fire, Solaris, Lolita, Nosferatu, True Lies, The Vanishing, Willard, etc. - but the actual list of remakes that truly and clearly outshone their origins is pretty damn thin really, at least from where I'm sitting.
Damn you Michael Bay by MCMLXXVI	Mar 13th, 2007 06:29:17 AM
Damn you Michael Bay
MCMLXXV is a tosser forever by Seph_J	Mar 13th, 2007 06:30:15 AM
You can quote me on that.
Oh people liked film X... lets remake it... by Uridium	Mar 13th, 2007 06:32:30 AM
For Jebus sake grow some an imagination hollywood and make something new. Stop remaking films that dont need it. God I am pissed off now!
MAXIM READERS SUCK by schmoove	Mar 13th, 2007 06:35:23 AM
On the subject of Carpenters' work, the readers of MAXIM magazine have voted Big Trouble in Little China the worst movie of all time! Travesty! I can only assume these are the sort of people who would tell you their favourite movie is The seventh Seal, when it's really Caddyshack
Take it easy, Uridium by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 06:38:05 AM
Hollywood makes new stuff all the time, much of which is available from your local Blockbuster. Seen The Prestige? That's a good one. How about Little Miss Sunshine? It's cute, and it has Alan Arkin out of Catch 22 in it. I hear that Pan's Labyrinth is pretty good, but I haven't seen it yet.
I know quite a few Maxim readers by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 06:39:58 AM
And you're right, schmoove, they do suck. Their favourite film tends to be The Fast And The Furious, though.
Dear Franklin by schmoove	Mar 13th, 2007 06:42:44 AM
Thanks for the insight into Maxim readers choices, but you have left me with cold, cold comfort.
Sledge Hammer said it best when he said NO NO NO NO NO by Seph_J	Mar 13th, 2007 06:45:05 AM
I'm sorry, but keep Butler away from 'Escape from New York'. Infact, keep the cameras away from Escape from New York. Yes, maybe Daniel Craig can do Bond, yes Christian Bale did Batman, MAYBE even Brandon Routh can pull of Superman (or was he playing Christopher Reeve?)..... but NOBODY can do Snake Pliskin but Kurt Russell. NOBODY. EVER. Back up, and keep the fuck away from this film. Release the soundtrack to the original film though because it's awesome. John Carpenter just wants a nice fat pension (hence the remakes of 'The Fog' and this new 'Halloween' shit i've been reading about). Any recent info on Argentos third 'mother' film? That film is certainly a miracle I thought would never happen. Carpenter take note.
sorry but The Departed is NOT better than Infernal by CuervoJones	Mar 13th, 2007 06:46:38 AM
Affairs
No, srsly dudes, let's give this a shot -- by just pillow talk	Mar 13th, 2007 06:49:41 AM
it sounds really cool! That's for you Doc!
Fuck those writers nowadays! by joergn	Mar 13th, 2007 06:52:11 AM
Just a bunch of lousy, sad, brainless fanboys, having nothing else in their mind then remaking the movies they watched friday night during childhood. Please tell me there are some talented writers out there or some intelligent producers out there to sign them, to prove me wrong!
this of course sucks the biggest pair by just pillow talk	Mar 13th, 2007 06:53:11 AM
of baboon nuts. Nothing can approach the campiness of that movie and the cleavage of Adrienne Barbeau. All hail Adrienne!
I'm not a fool, Plissken! by CutAndPaste	Mar 13th, 2007 06:54:21 AM
CALL...ME...SNAKE!!!
Oh yeah by CutAndPaste	Mar 13th, 2007 07:01:12 AM
And it's a bad idea.
Earth to Hollywood...STOP WITH THE REMAKES. by onemanarmy	Mar 13th, 2007 07:08:53 AM
Movies are that are considered to be "a classic," arefor very good reasons. God....zilla. Is there no creativity left?
Earth to Hollywood...STOP WITH THE REMAKES. by onemanarmy	Mar 13th, 2007 07:08:56 AM
Movies are that are considered to be "a classic," are for very good reasons. God....zilla. Is there no creativity left?
Whoa... by onemanarmy	Mar 13th, 2007 07:10:23 AM
Tried to fix the lack of a space and somehow double posted two totally different posts...taking that space into account of course.
Ouch by THE KNIGHT	Mar 13th, 2007 07:10:42 AM
What a blow to Kurt Russel's ole ego ehh.. no pun intended I agree onemanarmy... Come up with some original ideas for goodness sake!
Excuse me? by Crabman32	Mar 13th, 2007 07:10:43 AM
Well, well, well. what a fucking surprise. If I'm not quite getting over a Zombie Halloween and a CGI Thing I have to wake up to this news. Thanks a lot. Another one of my cherished Carpenter films about to go through the remake ringer and no doubt will come out the other end a big pile of shit. You can do snake without Russell and that is fact, just in the same way it was a bit retarded putting Tom Welling in the Fog. JESUS HELP ME. And another thing, Gerard Butler, although a fine actor, is just a bit, well you know, how do I say. TOO FUCKING VENOMY!
Italian job remake better than the original????? by MrJJonz	Mar 13th, 2007 07:10:53 AM
No . . . no . . . just no. That remake is up there with other classic remakes like Get Carter and Alfie. . .which also lacked any form of enjoyment.
Oh FFS by Judge Dredds Dirty Undies	Mar 13th, 2007 07:14:25 AM
Seriously this has to stop. You know they arent going to stop remaking John Carpenters good films until they finally ass fuck the thing.
You have got to be f*cking kidding me! by RighteousBrother	Mar 13th, 2007 07:15:45 AM
Snaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake Plisken, I've heard of you!
And in other news I see Stallone has now by MrJJonz	Mar 13th, 2007 07:16:49 AM
been charged with importing drugs . . .apparently it was a growth hormone - perhaps he is Tom Cruise's dealer
The fact that Adrian Lyne improved upon Kubricks Lolita by Seph_J	Mar 13th, 2007 07:17:01 AM
(even though Kubrick had a ton of shit on that film) proves that remakes can work.... but im sorry that something as stylishly individual as ESCAPE FROM NY is even being suggested for a remake. Assault on Precinct 13 was remade fairly well - still well below the originals quality, but passable. I dont know where this argument is going actually. Basicaly, let Tarantino direct 'ESCAPE FROM HONG KONG', set in 2020 with Kurt Russell once again being drafted in to save a democrat-endorsing Chinese official (played by a craggy Chow Yun-Fat) from being killed by the inhabitants of the ludicrously over-populated labour-camp-cum-prison of Hong Kong island, where anyone who is against communism is taken and brainwashed into zombies. Cue scary asian girls, kick-ass hong kong fighting, awesome Tarantino dialogue, quotable Pliskin one-liners, and even a political message. Now, isnt that better than a fucking remake. And I made it up as I typed. Think about it.
BUTLER IS NICK FURY! by stlfilmwire	Mar 13th, 2007 07:19:58 AM
MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT S.H.I.E.L.D.
BUTLER IS NICK FURY! by stlfilmwire	Mar 13th, 2007 07:20:00 AM
MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT S.H.I.E.L.D.
Maybe not such a bad idea, especially since... by HarryBlackPotter	Mar 13th, 2007 07:23:10 AM
...the original was a bit short on decent action sequences, and the low budget meant the original concept wasn't fully realised. Be interesting to see a new Snake on the block.
MrJJonz - that was in the news last week by just pillow talk	Mar 13th, 2007 07:26:27 AM
Didn't see that coming....
HarryBlackPotter = "No, srsly dudes, let's give this a by Seph_J	Mar 13th, 2007 07:27:26 AM
shot. It sounds really cool!"
MOTHER FLIPPING HOLLOWAY by Shermdawg	Mar 13th, 2007 07:32:52 AM
To hell with Mr.Yellsalot! Whether it's Plissken or Solid/Naked Snake JOSH HOLLOWAY is your guy. Seriously, you know I'm right about this one. JOSH HOLLOWAY WILL OWN YOUR ASSES!
Maybe the new gag on the remake will be... by Sledge Hammer	Mar 13th, 2007 07:33:32 AM
..."Snake Plissken, I heard of you...I heard you were Kurt Russell".
You have my vote, Seph_J by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 07:36:21 AM
You're suggested Escape From Hong Kong is genius. I would love to see that one. I trust your people are contacting John Carpenter's people as we speak? You can do lunch and whatnot.
You're - what the hell? by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 07:39:07 AM
Sorry about that. All this talk of Escape From New York has made me regress to my teenage years, back when I knew more about the A-Team than grammar and spelling and suchlike. P.S. No, srsly dudes, let's give this a shot -- it sounds really cool!
Well, They'll Need a CGI-Borgnine by Aquatarkusman	Mar 13th, 2007 07:45:38 AM
Or it isn't getting my hard-earned $12.50.
Jesus Tapdancing Christ by grendel69	Mar 13th, 2007 07:52:28 AM
Are they gonna remake every fucking cult movie from the 70s and 80s!?!? Remaking Escape From NY? WTF??? Enough already!
Bad career move. by CoursinLarry	Mar 13th, 2007 07:52:45 AM
Seriously, Gerard. This is NOT the movie to make now that you got some heat.
Hopefully by Redfive!	Mar 13th, 2007 07:53:13 AM
GB just does Watchmen instead of some shity EFNY remake,all of carpenters remakes have been shit,why will this be any good,plus sorry man KURT RUSSELL IS SNAKE NOBODY ELSE.
This... is... stupid! by JackPumpkinhead	Mar 13th, 2007 07:53:25 AM
Tonight, we remake all!
Franklin.... by Seph_J	Mar 13th, 2007 07:58:32 AM
if only.
Tapdancing Jesus gotta eat!!! by boba_rob	Mar 13th, 2007 08:13:42 AM
I was never a huge fan of the movie so I don't care.
God, now Hollywood's raping my adolescence by Laserbrain	Mar 13th, 2007 08:20:23 AM
Keep your dirty, coke-frosted knobs out of the asses/mouths of my favourite movies, you bastards.
They already made a remake by Samuel Fulmer	Mar 13th, 2007 08:24:11 AM
It was called Escape From L.A. You can pick it up from most Wal-Marts for 5 bucks.
butler's by monkeybrow	Mar 13th, 2007 08:29:26 AM
acting sucks major ass
WHY? WHY? WHY? by Right Bastard	Mar 13th, 2007 08:29:47 AM
Leave Carpenter the FUCK alone!!!!! Stop the remakes! Doesn't anyone have an original fucking idea?
The Thing is not a remake. by JackPumpkinhead	Mar 13th, 2007 08:32:59 AM
The Thing and The Fly are not remakes. They are radically different adaptations of source stories. NOT of the films that first adapted those stories. They're either very faithful where the original wasn't (Carpenter) - or not faithful at all where the original was (Cronenberg.) Oh, and for heaven's sake, have Carpenter work on a real film once again before something bad happens to him (for example, before Eric Red runs him over.) Because if something did happen right now, then the man's last work would be THAT WORTHLESS TV SERIES "MASTERS OF HORROR"! Do you realize that? What kind of swan song would that be for Carpenter? Argh!
Famous 70s/80s movie that hasn't been remade: CALIGULA! by JackPumpkinhead	Mar 13th, 2007 08:36:50 AM
(I just gave someone in Hollywood a watercooler idea, didn't I?)
This is terrible!!!!!!!!! by cekma	Mar 13th, 2007 08:38:02 AM
Cause he yelled words? All of a sudden he's the next action star!? He was entertaining and all but the movie was not amazing and he was not really the reason why the movie did well, he was part of the reason sure but not the reason. No one bran out to see a movie called 300 because of Gerald Butler (the cheap man's Clive Owen) Did anyone see the f'n phantom!? I'm happy for the guy and everything, and hope continues to have a career, but talk about stroking ones ego, this is absurd! Between this and Rob Zombie's Shit-o-ween! How many years are we away from a Jaws or Jurassic Park remake, seriously? I don't even care if you like Escape from NY or not (I love it, great film for it's time) you could agree that the remake plague is becoming an issue. Not only that but now the sequels of remakes, etc. When is The Birds going to get remade? Oh wait we don't have to wait that long, oh joy!
Escape from Earth needs to happen by Boondock Devil	Mar 13th, 2007 08:39:53 AM
Get Russell and Carpenter and finish off the Escape trilogy.
Plus you just know Big Trouble in Little China's next by Boondock Devil	Mar 13th, 2007 08:40:36 AM
Starring Ashton Kutcher. And then the whole world shuddered.
"Maxim Readers." by Zarles	Mar 13th, 2007 08:41:38 AM
Now there's an oxymoron if I've ever heard one.
The remake insanity has gotta stop! by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 08:43:23 AM
But if they wanted to remake THE OPENING OF MISTY BEETHOVEN, I wouldn't complain.
"Emerging action star" by Redfoot the Fence	Mar 13th, 2007 08:43:28 AM
Yes, because everybody was transfixed by the magnificent performance turned in by Gerard Butler in a movie full of eye candy.
I just bought some bacon by The Awfulism	Mar 13th, 2007 08:49:19 AM
I think they should cast a real life snake in the role - and call him MAN Plissken.
Boondock Devil - that was not funny! by just pillow talk	Mar 13th, 2007 08:55:35 AM
feeling sort of invincible.
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO REMAKES NO REMAKES NO! by coen_fan	Mar 13th, 2007 08:55:57 AM
Seriously. You're all a bunch of rabid monkey-eating burritos.
I COULD SEE THIS by the beef	Mar 13th, 2007 09:07:25 AM
Being written by the guy who did BLACK HAWK DOWN? Already that's similar material. I'm more curious as to who is going to direct. In fact, I'd be happier had they said Snyder was directing instead of Butler is acting in it. The way Snyder did the DOTD remake makes me think he'd handle the material very well. But that won't happen. And neither will Danny Boyle. I don't know about Butler for Snake. I haven't seen anything from him to make me think he can play Russell's Snake, but he may be written different from the original, so I don't know.
Franklin: Remake of Italian Job better than original!!! by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 09:08:02 AM
I......I.......errr......i'm.. ....just speechless with rage!..anger rising.....you....you....ahh.. .arghh.....I need to sit down for a moment. I'll deal with you later you cur you!
Hey! by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 09:11:00 AM
I may be a burrito-eating monkey, but I am no monkey-eating burrito! Shame on you, coen_fan. The Big Lebowski, mind, that's a good one, isn't it?
another major flaw.... by kingrobot	Mar 13th, 2007 09:14:53 AM
The last time I checked, New York has a serious lack of very tall, flat roofed landmark buildings to make a stealth glider landing / take off possible. Damn you terrorists all to hell.
I can feel your anger, Big_Bubbaloola by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 09:15:31 AM
Sorry, mate. I just never liked that film - a cute mini car chase and the rest of it is crap. Also, it has Benny fucking Hill in it, Benny fucking Hill brought shame on Englishmen the world over. Shame! Mind you, I'm not saying the remake's a classic, either. It's just not as bad as the original.
The Hollywood Remake Machines Sucks by Grammaton Cleric Binks	Mar 13th, 2007 09:17:38 AM
This is blasphemy. Everyone once in a while a classic movie erupts onto the scene to create a new genre, and is followed by a bunch of B-grade copycats. Mad Max, First Blood, and Escape from New York are prime examples of these. Until something new comes along we need to put up with this garbage. Oh yeah, and bring back Ox Baker.
Well, crap! HOWEVER... by Merrick	Mar 13th, 2007 09:18:33 AM
I freaking love ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK & this news has all kindsa stink on it. Although…I started thinking (usually not a good thing)…and this is COMPLETELY conjectural & not based on any inside knowledge…BUT an EFNY remake done “virtually” (a la 300) with sprawling apocalyptic New York Cityscapes underneath forboding, dirty skies…and Snake battling down an ocean of “crazies” (inmates) with futuristic (and not so futuristic) weapons might have a pretty decent cool factor, no? Mixed feelings…but curious…
Wasn't there already a remake... by Gatack	Mar 13th, 2007 09:20:05 AM
In Escape from L.A.? There really isn't much that seperates that from NY.
They Live by Grammaton Cleric Binks	Mar 13th, 2007 09:22:40 AM
Had one of the best street fight scenes of all time. Piper and David were both out of bubble gum.
Speaking of remakes... by Spikes Brain	Mar 13th, 2007 09:24:48 AM
I saw that there's a direct-to-DVD sequel out to The Rock's WALKING TALL, starring Kevin Sorbo. Which makes it a direct-to-DVD sequel to a remake of a remake. Damn...
no with all due respect to mr butler by JeanLuc Dickhard	Mar 13th, 2007 09:26:50 AM
kurt is snake plissken and he can still play plisskin just look at the trailer for grindhouse ...
I am a Maxim reader by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 09:36:17 AM
and I am stupid, and I love The Fast and The Furious! It's like you people have known me my whole life! Although, I occasionally branch out and read FHM and watch Torque.
Oh, I got it! by SPECTRE Agent	Mar 13th, 2007 09:36:31 AM
It was driving me nuts where I'd seen the actor playing Daxos in 300 and then I remembered: he was Gerard Butler's right-hand man in "Atilla". Coincindence?
Bring back Kurt Russel for... by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 09:38:29 AM
ESCAPE FROM EARTH! I may be a stupid Maxim reader but even I know that's the logical continuation of this franchise.
Actually, I'd watch this if he were in it... by Anna Valerious	Mar 13th, 2007 09:42:30 AM
Hell, he made a better Phantom...and I'm still pushing for Noel Fielding as Windslow/Glam Rock Phantom in the POTP remake... Hotter guys in remakes FTW, baby.
I for one am looking forward to the direct to dvd... by kravmaguffin	Mar 13th, 2007 09:46:43 AM
Sequel to the remake! You can have Kevin Sorbo playing Snake and Steven Seagal playing Lee Van Cleef's character! DMX will be the Duke of New York...
Merrick... by cekma	Mar 13th, 2007 09:46:52 AM
Then don't remake Escape From NY, use the technology and make a DIFFERENT film then EFNY, but one that deals with an apocalyptic city Your curiousity will be satisfied and we won't have to bastardize art at the same time. Example: Metal Gear Solid's Snake is INSPIRED by Kurt's Snake. They took that inspiration and created their own world and art. Maybe I'm picky but I'm born and raised in NY, a proud native my whole life and I'm ver picky with they do with the ciy on the silver screen
The problem I have with this... by ldm882	Mar 13th, 2007 09:49:35 AM
and I'm sure a lot of you can agree, is not that I hate remakes in and of themselves (there can be good ones), but I know too many idiots who've never seen the classic original movies and prefer, say, the remake of Assault on Precinct 13 to the original. Or Sandler's remake of The Longest Yard. Etc, etc. Many of these are the same people who love torture porn too...
LEAVE CARPENTER's EARLY STUFF ALONE by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 09:51:27 AM
ARSEHOLES. this pisses me off no end. Why can they not go and fuck up some of his later work instead of turning some of his finest work into retard movies. and as for what that fucking hack is doing to Halloween. PAH. ps, and I know this may be a bit of a yuck idea (and I don't want anyone to believe I actually think this is a good idea- or even want it considered), why are the remake arseholes not doing Dark Star? Subject matter too difficult, perhaps?
Kurt would do another Snake film by liljuniorbrown	Mar 13th, 2007 09:55:29 AM
I heard him say it the other morning while I was listening to him plug his movie on the Lex and Terry show. It was a call in interview like everyones doing now to the syndicated market shows. They are big fans of his and told him that he has played the iconic charectors every guy dreams of to which he replied " Yeah i'm so lucky i mean if your going to play a singer why not play Elvis right? A cowboy,why not Wyatt Earp?If your going to play a hockey coach why not the coach of the greatest U.S Hockey Team,and if your going to play a captain why not play Captain Ron" Which I thought was hysterical,he sounds like a great guy. He even talked about how lucky of a guy he was even when it meant he had to go home and tell Goldie Hawn(who he was banging in real life,still is) that he was going to have to prentend to bang Michelle Phiefer in Tequilla Sunrise, fucking brilliant. He said he was thrilled to be Snake Plissken because "he had no rules" and was the first "hardcore bad ass" that he ever got to play."A guy with no rules,just kick ass." You could tell he knows what his role in American cinema is and he knows he's blessed to be what most guys would love to be.
Hey Franklin, keep yer hands off my anger you dirty man by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 09:56:53 AM
And that comment about the Man who was Hill!!!! Fer shame!!! Next you'll be telling me that "Zulu" sucked tribal balls! And that would be pushing things tooo far me laddy-o.
Escape from New York has already been remade by ELGordo	Mar 13th, 2007 09:59:12 AM
It's called Escape from LA and is god fucking awful. Hopefully Grindhouse will top the charts and these executives will see that Kurt has some Bad Ass left inside him. Escape from Earth would be a better choice than a remake.
Bad Mr Wonka, by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 09:59:49 AM
I'd go with The Thing, Assault on Precinct 13 (The Carpenter one), The Fly, and I struggle beyond that. Franklin, go and lock yourself in a dark room where the only light source is the flickering TV playing the remake of Get Carter, and beat yourself repeatedly around the head with a copy of the script for zulu whilst chanting "YOU'RE ONLY SUPPOSED TO BLOW THE BLOODY DOORS OFF" until that truly horrid idea laeavs your mind.
Carpenter himself re-made a classic.... by RighteousBrother	Mar 13th, 2007 10:00:10 AM
and that was cool.
Snake Plissken Is Still Alive!?!?!?! by Mentok	Mar 13th, 2007 10:02:03 AM
I heard he was dead! Seriously though, a truly bad idea. Is it still going to be set in 1997? This is one of those cases where there is no benefit to calling it Escape From New York. The people who know the title will resent the new movie, and the kids who they want to see it will have no idea it's a remake anyway. Why not just do their own futuristic city-prison movie? I'd still go see it, and I wouldn't walk in with the baggage I'll have if it is called Escape From New York.
I knew that would annoy folks. Sorry and that. by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 10:06:39 AM
We're so starved for classics in England we've embraced that stupid mini film with Benny Hill in it, but I believe that deep down inside we are all ashamed and know better. P.S. I'm not anti-Caine. Zulu is good. P.P.S. Has anyone mentioned that Escape From LA is a remake of Escape From New York yet? That seems like a pithy and insightful comment to add. Also, the silver surfer is too silver.
THIS IS NEW YOOOOOOORK!!!!!!! by dopepope	Mar 13th, 2007 10:09:39 AM
he should just play SNAKE in the MGS movie.
BTILC by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 10:16:10 AM
Lo-Pan will fucking stab a baby in the fucking face, and lick the blood off his sword afterwords.
So they're just remaking the entire Carpenter output? by BitterMan23	Mar 13th, 2007 10:17:07 AM
a Thing remake is on deck too, no? Call me when they get to Memoirs of an Invisible Man.
EFNY=bliss, EFLA=really awful.. by Billyeveryteen	Mar 13th, 2007 10:17:40 AM
Still, I want Escape from Somewhere, but I heard Snake Pliskin was dead.
Damn Franklin you beat me to the remake gag! by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:22:08 AM
Now you an even bigger curr! Yeah I said it! Curr!!! CURRRRR!!! (I actually don't know what curr means by the way, I could be calling you a fluffy bunnykins for all I know).
Leave Snake alone, or let Russell do it. by Giant Fish	Mar 13th, 2007 10:28:19 AM
I'd love to see Snake again, but only Russell is Snake. You can't just slap an eyepatch on some other dude. Kurt rules. He kicked Elvis in the shins, how cool is that?
Lucas is remaking Star Wars by Wave Motion Gun	Mar 13th, 2007 10:28:48 AM
One scene at a time.
Screw this. Carpenter needs to make part 3. by The Atomic Worm	Mar 13th, 2007 10:30:49 AM
"Escape from Earth" or "Escape from New Orleans"
Also, I like EFLA by The Atomic Worm	Mar 13th, 2007 10:31:31 AM
It's a huge guilty pleasure
We all know it's a stupid mini film by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 10:32:12 AM
and it has got that national embarrasment Benny Hill in it. However, It's still cool as fuck, hugely quotable, and just plain amusing. Things the sequel aren't. We're also not starved of classics either. Ignoramus. this trend for remaking carpenter reminds me of the one where they remade the Caine films- Alfie, The Italian Job, Get Carter etc, and look at the fucking abominations that resulted. So far on the Carpenter remake trail we have a piss poor Precinct 13, a fucking truly awful Fog, and a retard version of Halloween coming. Anyone else see the similarities?
BitterMan: Thanks, i'd almost forgotten about Memoirs! by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:33:17 AM
You sir are a curr....ok I REALLY need to stop that now!
Hey Mori... by genro	Mar 13th, 2007 10:34:59 AM
What does Carpenter say about this? I thought he had some ownership on this one, especially after Debra Hill passed. In fact, doesn't Kurt have some type of control? I thought that was apart of his EFLA deal.
It's a remake, buddy, not a sequel by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 10:36:34 AM
And I'll take a version with Seth Green over one with Benny Hill any day. Also, quoting the 'bloody doors off' thing was officially worn out back in 1987. You're actually not allowed to do it anymore. I think they passed a law or something - even the Queen was sick of it.
Kurt's a god. Butler is making a huge mistake. by genro	Mar 13th, 2007 10:39:10 AM
Moritz is a fucking idiot to think this will work.
Right, let's set this straight. Yes EFNY was remade.... by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:39:30 AM
as ESLA, and yes KR and JC need to make the third film Escape from Earth. NOW JUST LET IT LIE!!!! Talk about repeat yourselves......currs. Ok that's it, i'm off to get thesaurus and get a new insult!
For Big_Bubbaloola by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 10:40:04 AM
cur noun 1. an inferior dog or one of mixed breed 2. a cowardly and despicable person Seems a little harsh, but Lost Prophet will probably agree with you. He thinks I am an ignoramus! That's what I get for attacking a national treasure, I suppose.
TAKING BETS NOW - The New Snake Will Be Black by genro	Mar 13th, 2007 10:40:58 AM
wait and see how "urban" and "contemporary" this film gets.
I meant remake by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 10:41:35 AM
fuck knows why I typed sequel. must be work and this horrible news combined with that horrid Italian Job suggestion melting my tiny little mind. sorry about that,
Franklin: Agreed that the 'Bloody doors' is past it. by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:42:28 AM
How about "My dear, everybody in the wooorld is bent". Noel Coward RIP.
Franklin: Sorry about the 'Cur' thing then. by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:46:30 AM
But for the love of God don't go to an England home game and say that the Italian Job was crap. It will only end in tears.
I know that quote is past it by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 10:49:13 AM
I just was suffering from an irrational fit of rage and for some reason that is the first one that popped into my head (probably because it is so abused). How about "You must learn, Keats, there are more things to life than breaking and entering." Noel Coward RIP
Christ,I wake up to THIS?!? by TORTURE PWN	Mar 13th, 2007 10:49:53 AM
When are you assholes going to stop paying money to see this shit!You KNOW they're only remaking stuff because remakes are "hip" and NOT because they actually have good ideas,don't you?When Paul W.S. Anderson,Rob Cohen,Ewe Boll,rob zombie or one of Michael Bay's video director cronies gets attatched don't say I didn't warn you when you should have fucking known better from the second you heard it would be done.Half of you shitheads are stuck supporting remakes now because of your stance on zombies SHALLOWEEN and can't backtrack now.See what you've done?We expect Hollywood to run this shit up the flagpole but do you fuckheads really need to salute it?
Maximizing my time by shellfishh	Mar 13th, 2007 10:51:46 AM
I was stuck in a car repair waiting room and read the latest Maxim. It has some great pictures of Christina Aguilera, by the way. And it DIDN'T call "Big Trouble in Little China" the worst movie of all time. It called it the 'Best Bad Movie of all Time". I love BTiLC and wasn't at all insulted by that listing. It is a GREAT bad movie.
Blackface is not cool, genro by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 10:53:32 AM
You know, sensitivity and that. I guess they could make the actor mentioned in the title of this article appear more 'urban' (to use the parlance of our times) with CGI and whatnot, but I can't see it flying with the NAACAP. Saying that, if they were going to recast, the only man for the job is Wesley Snipes. He would make a great Snake Plissken. Okay, it would basically be Blade with an eyepatch, but what the hell is wrong with that?
Its all JC's fault by Crabman32	Mar 13th, 2007 10:54:35 AM
Lest we forget that Carpenter himself will probably be exec producing like he did on the shitty remake of The Fog etc. The man has clearly lost all sense of dignity. Just imagine Coppola agreeing to exec produce a modern remake of The Godfather with Snoop Dogg as the don. Uttet wank.
ESCAPE FROM RHODE ISLAND, oh god... by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:55:16 AM
what have you started BringingSexyBack!
THE GREAT ESCAPE FROM THE GANGS OF NEW YORK STORIES by Pound Sand	Mar 13th, 2007 10:55:32 AM
Four pointless remakes in one !
That's NAACP, obviously by Franklin T Marmoset	Mar 13th, 2007 10:56:53 AM
Fucking hell, I'm going home. Cheers, Ain't It Cool types!
ESCAPE FROM THE REMAKE TEMPLE OF DOOM by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:57:14 AM
Maybe i'm not very good at this.
ESCAPE FROM BOGNOR REGIS by Big_Bubbaloola	Mar 13th, 2007 10:58:15 AM
God knows you'd want to.
ESCAPE FROM SHEFFIELD by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 10:59:26 AM
It took me 20 years to get the fuck out.
ESCAPE FROM CELINE DION by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:00:42 AM
alternatively called drowning on the titanic
ESCAPE FROM AUDIENCE INTEREST by Pound Sand	Mar 13th, 2007 11:01:13 AM

ESCAPE FROM BOX OFFICE REVENUE by Pound Sand	Mar 13th, 2007 11:01:44 AM

ESCAPE FROM NEW IDEAS by Pound Sand	Mar 13th, 2007 11:02:26 AM

ESCAPE FROM WORK by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:05:44 AM
or, as it is better known, POSTING ON AICN IN OFFICE HOURS. gotta love it.
ESCAPE FROM THE BAN HAMMER by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:07:41 AM
or: RENAMING YOURSESLF BRINGINGSEXYBACK WHEN IT SEEMS APPARANT THAT YOU ARE BROKEBACKCOWBOY. Don't be shy- there's no shame in being banned
ESCAPE FROM THE BAN HAMMER by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:07:42 AM
or: RENAMING YOURSESLF BRINGINGSEXYBACK WHEN IT SEEMS APPARANT THAT YOU ARE BROKEBACKCOWBOY. Don't be shy- there's no shame in being banned
Butler in Godfather Remake? by D_T	Mar 13th, 2007 11:08:33 AM
Yes! "Sicilians, tonight we dine in Mario's!!"
JackPumpkinhead by DirkVega	Mar 13th, 2007 11:08:43 AM
Maybe someone has posted this already, but, coincidentally, a tongue-and-cheek trailer was made for a nonextistent remake of CALIGULA, and who is in it? Gerard Butler! Along with Milla Jovovich and Helen Mirren. It might still be on youtube...
ESCAPE FROM ANGELINA JOLIE'S COLON by dekionplexis	Mar 13th, 2007 11:09:51 AM
..ah,..think I'll stay a while.. - Pliiiiiiisssskeeeeeeen!
Thought He'd Be Taller ... by doubledumbassonyou	Mar 13th, 2007 11:11:48 AM
Anyone how has listened to the EFNY & BTiLC commentaries with Carpenter & Russell know that they have a true love for these characters. I would love nothing more for Kurt to come back and play Snake once more. Sure EFLA was a shitfest but it had its moments. Gerard Butler is getting noticed, I'm happy for him ... I'm hoping Death Proof will do for Russell what Pulp Fiction did for Travolta ... make him a marketable actor again. For too long Russell has been playing drunk dads and miscreants. This will be his return to form, Carpenter will get his ass in gear and a Third Escape movie will get done (or maybe BTiLC2?)
JackPumkinhead -> C:2 by D_T	Mar 13th, 2007 11:12:21 AM
Nice find: http://tinyurl.com/25jchy
Best remake ever? by Tinfang	Mar 13th, 2007 11:19:11 AM
That's easy, 'The Lord of the Rings'. Yeah, you have to count that Bakshi abortion. Talk about a no brainer. O the hoot! C'mon people, the original 'Escape From NY' wasn't exactly up there with Larry of Arabia now was it? It could stand to use modern SFX and Butler would be just as believable as Kurt (though Kurt ain't too old to do it either!). I'm with the "I'd rather see something original!" crowd though.
Not seeing remakes is remarkably easy... by Flip63Hole	Mar 13th, 2007 11:20:41 AM
Try it sometime... Never seen the new "The Fog", any of the new Chainsaw flicks, "Stranger Calls" nuthin'.
FAST AND FURIOUS ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK'S TRIPLE X!!! by godoffireinhell	Mar 13th, 2007 11:24:31 AM
The original could use some remaking but not with that dumbass Neal Moritz on board.
Escape from Earth is a bad idea. by Seph_J	Mar 13th, 2007 11:25:00 AM
It implies space ships and crap like that. Wrong genre, dudes. Kurt Russell on a space ship is NOT Snake Pliskin. I believe I posted a far better continuation of the series earlier in the talkback. IF you were remaking EFNY, who would have the Donald Pleasance role? Malcolm McDowell again? other ideas?
I dare ANYONE to put a positive spin on this by Doctor_Sin	Mar 13th, 2007 11:26:44 AM
Because if you do, you are fucking joking and need to die expeditiously. Even an asskissing "I don't know if this is a good or bad idea" is a piece of shit response. Remaking this is a bad fucking idea and needs to just be put away.
Don't do it, you assholes by Vern	Mar 13th, 2007 11:26:50 AM
If Gerard wants to be in it that's fine, I don't blame him. But what about these assholes that want to MAKE it? Don't give me that "I'm a huge fan of the original" bullshit because it ain't true. If you were a huge fan you'd see as clear as day that Kurt Russell is still Snake Plissken and you'd be trying to make a new Snake Plissken movie. I mean, it's already been remade as ESCAPE FROM LA anyway, we don't need that story again. Why don't you boys make up a NEW character and story for Gerard that incorporates what you like about ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK but also the drastic, ridiculous changes you were gonna make to "re-imagine" it? I'll tell you why, because what you like about ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK is the title. And maybe the eyepatch. Don't worry bud, we'll give you the eyepatch for free. Just stay the fuck away from Snake. Thanks fellas.
Verno! by BGDAWES	Mar 13th, 2007 11:30:32 AM
I was wondering when you'd chime in...
Vern Speaks the truth by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:30:53 AM
wankers. It's amazing that every time they declare their adoration for the original they then fuck it right in the arse. scum
Franklin by Boba Fat	Mar 13th, 2007 11:32:23 AM
Benny Hill is as English as Fish & Chips, shit weather and tossing it off all day on a talkback when you should be working. Leave the Hill alone. There's no shame in enjoying watching an couple of old men being chased around a field by ladies in suspenders.
Where's the GOTTA ESCAPE FROM NY MASK? by Doctor_Sin	Mar 13th, 2007 11:34:07 AM
"Let's make Snake a single dad and give him two kids who actually help him save the day - a son who is a smart aleck prankster and a daughter who is a brilliant and sassy team leader. We'll also give Snake a love interest who happens to be a tough-talking bounty hunter who happens to know security codes all over NY and is able to save Snake's ass. Just to emasculate Snake even more, let's not give him usual weaponry, but a gaggle of super-hi-tech laser guns and shit so that we can crank up the action, but not the violence and still get a PG-13 movie."
Vern, these twats in Hollywood have no creativity by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 11:35:31 AM
They're "re-imagining" Star Trek and EFNY... nobody has a fucking brain out there anymore. All they care about is "branding" and the so-called "built-in" audiences that come with that. Vern, you've seen it even with the WALKING TALL movies. And who was clamoring for that series to be re-invigorated on video?
Hey, YB by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:36:48 AM
We need ESCAPE FROM THE MAN-CATS or any original idea. Any.
Yeah... by D_T	Mar 13th, 2007 11:38:01 AM
I hate when an actor becomes "hot property" - because it becomes too simple for the machine to say "OK, what properties do we own/can we buy to toss this guy into". If I were Butler I'd shop around for a indie film, show my acting chops, THEN whore myself out (maybe the Kurt Russel character in the 3rd remake of Titanic?) [...]
Doctor_Sin, you've almost described Spielberg's WOTW by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 11:38:02 AM
The single father with the two rugrats. God, I fucking hate that movie. If I was Tom Cruise, iw ould have fed those kids to the aliens. And then I would have picked up ladies in the ONLY functioning minivan in all of New Jersey!
like i said by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 11:39:42 AM
Lo-Pan+Stabbing babies=best movie premise of all time. Yes I said premise, cause that would be the whole fucking movie
It's the Spielberg flaw by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:40:13 AM
count the amount of his films with nauseating children in them. It is a suprising amount.
LP! How goes it! by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 11:41:21 AM
Good to see you're back on the boards. My idea is to merge James Cameron's two recent projects and have MAN-CATS go back in time to meet Jesus of Nazareth. They will give Jesus superior technology to impress the locals and in exchange, Jesus will make a Man-Cat jungle gym that they can install in their spaceship. Kind of like how Harrison Ford did shelving for George Lucas' office and in return, Lucas made Ford his Han Solo. What do you think?
By the way Moriarty by Vern	Mar 13th, 2007 11:42:22 AM
In Sparta, every man is responsible for his words. We kill messengers in Sparta. Sparta this and Sparta that. SPARTAAAA!!!
What a great remake!!!! by number5withabullet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:44:23 AM
Actually, why don't we just combine ALL of Carpenter's movies and remake them into the "Memoirs of the Starman Prince" trilogy, where the films are entitled "Chapter One: They lived with Ghosts from Mars, and Escaped", "Chapter Two: Big Trouble with the Vampire Christine", and finally the rollicking last act, "In the Mouth of a Damned Thing... in The Fog."
BSB, ESCAPE FROM MONTREAL by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 11:44:23 AM
Without emptying your checking account at the tug-shops... that's a movie right there, fella.
So,Mr."give the HALLOWEEN remake a chance"Verm by TORTURE PWN	Mar 13th, 2007 11:45:57 AM
chimes in.It's like that old saying about the Nazis.1st they come for AASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 & THE FOG,then they come for HALLOWEEN,now it's ESCAPE FROM N.Y. etc.In my book anyone against this that isn't also against the HALLOWEEN rerape is an unequivical hypocrite.I don't care how much you love THE DEVIL'S RETARDS.
Escape From Earth....The Thing Returns by liljuniorbrown	Mar 13th, 2007 11:46:01 AM
Bigger Trouble in Little China, They Live Again!!!! and the list goes on of Carpenter sequels that have to be made sometime in this century. We all have to wonder what happened to the creativity of guys like Carpenter and Craven. Are there best days behind them for good? Two long post just to say what I think everyone else is thinking....WE WOULD MUCH RATHER PAY TO SEE A GOOD SEQUEL OR FOLLOW UP THAN ANOTHER DAMN REMAKE. NO KURT RUSSELL?, NO SNAKE PLISSKEN!!!
Escape from Lo-Pan by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 11:46:46 AM
it would be 2 minutes long
Escape From Witch Mountain by Boba Fat	Mar 13th, 2007 11:48:48 AM
Where Snake comes across two kids who are aliens and rides in a levitating RV. Before the kids zoom off in a UFO.
It's all Zombie's fault... by Spikes Brain	Mar 13th, 2007 11:49:20 AM
I was trying to remember who did the lousy theme song for Escape From LA. I looked it up, and it was White Zombie. Dude, we get it, you're hairy and you like old horror movies. Could you please go away now?
Escape From Perjury: The Scooter Libby Story by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 11:50:51 AM
Pardon me!
I know I spelled "unequivocal" wrong ,dammit by TORTURE PWN	Mar 13th, 2007 11:52:06 AM
zombie would have said "fucking" instead.
Tootsie 2: Return to Dustin Hoffman's ass by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 11:53:03 AM
starring Lo-Pan
As the President said on Air Force One by Doctor_Sin	Mar 13th, 2007 11:57:23 AM
"Get this MOTHERFUCKING Snake off of this MOTHERFUCKING plane!"
"Escape from Earth: Captain Ron's Revenge" by number5withabullet	Mar 13th, 2007 11:59:50 AM
I think I might be the only one who rememebers that OTHER movie where Russell donned an eyepatch.
THIS IS LIKE by WISEBLOOD	Mar 13th, 2007 12:00:10 PM
Remaking Citizen Cain. The worst idea fucking ever. EFNY is a nearly perfect film in tone and execution. I can see an update, with newly redone special effects, maybe a directors cut to get the beginning readded, but a remake? COME ON. Thats the dumbest idea since greedo shooting first.
Escape From AICN by Boba Fat	Mar 13th, 2007 12:02:06 PM
Chubby geek, Snake Foreskin, tries to escape from his computer screen after getting all giddy over an entertaining talkback. But he needs a toilet break. Can he do it? or will he piss himself?
Hey YB by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 12:02:12 PM
I think a square go between the MAN-CATS and the son of god would be interesting- provided it wasn't done in a South Park "Super Friends" kind of way. Don't play it for laughs, man, don't. Remake! Pah- we've just shown more originality than the carpenter raping twats.
Will they CGI in the World Trade Center buildings by ATARI	Mar 13th, 2007 12:04:16 PM
that's all I want to know
no number5withabullet some of us do remember... by TORTURE PWN	Mar 13th, 2007 12:04:43 PM
no matter how hard we try to forget.
My Pet Goat: Desert Storm 2 by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 12:04:54 PM
with cameo by Lo-Pan on drums
More ideas for remakes by Samuel Fulmer	Mar 13th, 2007 12:05:01 PM
to come from Hollywood if Carpenter ever gets the chance to direct another film. Actually, maybe this is why he's been staying away from theaters since Ghosts of Mars.
Hey, isn't it time someone remade "300"? by BenBraddock	Mar 13th, 2007 12:05:36 PM
It's been out all of 2 weeks
shwermdawg by lofe101	Mar 13th, 2007 12:07:44 PM
i agree with you a 100%. if there is going to be a new escape, Josh holloway is more than perfect. as much as i dont mind butler, holloway looks and sounds the part. if he is not this snake, then he should be the other snake in metal gear solid. or if not, kurt russel could still pull it off.
301 Spartans by Samuel Fulmer	Mar 13th, 2007 12:07:47 PM
starring Glenn Close and Jeff Daniels.
Just out of curiosity by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 12:08:12 PM
Isn't Ghosts of Mars a remake of Assault on Precinct 13, which was a remake? or am I being stupid?
Coming this Summer... by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 12:08:33 PM
Larry the Cable Guy is GOAT FUCKER. he's a retarded steel worker with a heart of gold and a dick that seeks out goats. He must go through trials and tribulations to find the spirit within. Lo-Pan
Actually, BSB I'm Escaping TO Montreal in July by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 12:11:46 PM
Got a dual bachelor party thing going on (not my party, bah!). I was up there last summer and I swear I had to go to stripper rehab afterwards. $10 (CAD) dances! And you get to touch, spank... (sigh) and twist.
Rip-Offs over Remakes by Samuel Fulmer	Mar 13th, 2007 12:12:59 PM
Because I'll take a Psycho rip-off like Dressed to Kill anyday over a shot for shot remake. Who would have thought Hollywood would have every one championing the days when directors and producers would rip-off other films instead of remaking them?
ESCAPE FROM NEW POTATOES by Crabman32	Mar 13th, 2007 12:16:47 PM
I fucking hate the things.
LP, I'm writing the MAN-CATS as being Jewish by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 12:18:35 PM
It will be revealed that they communicated The Ten Cat-manned-ments to Moses, split the Red Sea with a device similar to the Probe from Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, and they meet up with Jesus to help clean up some of the corruption in Jerusalem. Oh and baptisms are a sign of complete devotion as MAN-CATS hate water and believe that immersing oneself in it is a "significant sign of faith." Little do the MAN-CATS realize, that humans love water, but Jesus and John The Baptist play along with the misunderstanding as they want to get that wine-making machine the MAN-CATS have been promising to exchange with them.
don't do that by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 12:24:15 PM
BSB will have a coronary, can I have a wine making machine? Just to accelerate my decline into cirrosis driven stupidity, you understand. If I have a wine-making machine I might be able to consume enough so that this shitty remake seems like a good idea. Or I may die trying.
Literally could fucking weep... by SK229	Mar 13th, 2007 12:27:04 PM
Honestly, has all creativity been sucked out of Hollywood at this point? I loved this movie when I was a kid, but I don't think it's the end of the world to do a remake. I think it's the end of the world because THAT'S ALL they seem to do anymore. Wow... I just mean... wwwwwow. Cinema, our beloved form of entertainment, is in need of some serious saving right now. It needs an injection of original ideas, new talent, and a sizable audience to prove that the first two can make studios money. Even then, I don't know... it's not like that hasn't been proven. Maybe it's just been forgotten?
My only problem with remakes is... by gorydon	Mar 13th, 2007 12:28:13 PM
That the studios are not focusing on more original material. I don't care if a movie I love gets remade. The original will always be there. Plus more people will see the original because of the remake. For example, "Hey man, have you seen Dawn of the Dead?"-"Yes I have, but I like the original better."-"Oh, it's a remake? I'll have to check the old one out."...I think they should make Metal Gear Solid over an EFNY remake though. Butler would be great as that Snake.
When hell hath run out of ideas, the remakes will...... by Orcus	Mar 13th, 2007 12:28:29 PM
....walk the earth
Escape From El Este by Doctor_Sin	Mar 13th, 2007 12:28:46 PM
Starring Carlos Mencia. A new Taco Bell is under siege by rampaging hoodlums. Carlos Mencia plays an inner-city teacher who braves going in to rescue the employees.
CHILDREN OF FUCKING MEN!!! by PwnedByStallone	Mar 13th, 2007 12:33:19 PM
Pull my finger.
You misspelled Citizen Cane. by Kurzinski Valentine	Mar 13th, 2007 12:33:51 PM
You damn remaker, you.
LP, the movie will be called SCHRODINGER'S MAN-CATS by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 12:33:53 PM
The MAN-CATS will tamper with the very fabric of our universe when they bring Tupac back to Ancient Jerusalem to rule as King David.
Ummm Kurzinski Valentine... by YackBacker	Mar 13th, 2007 12:35:26 PM
It's CITIZEN KANE, not "Cane" nor is it "Cain" as you aptly pointed out. I guess its time we all resolve to lay off the cokane. :)
I did nothing for society:The Anna Nichole Smith Story by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 12:40:09 PM
cool
i'm gonna get murdered for this one by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 12:41:40 PM
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang 2: The Richard Jeni story
Journey/Escape by Spikes Brain	Mar 13th, 2007 12:41:54 PM
Snake breaks into the San Fernando Valley to rescue Steve Perry, who's been held prisoner by terrorists since 1989.
At least it's not a prequel! by Doctor_Sin	Mar 13th, 2007 12:44:39 PM
"The Young Plissken Chronicles"
or the Kaning by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 12:44:52 PM
bondage is fun
Kloipy, I thought it was funnny in a macabre way by Doctor_Sin	Mar 13th, 2007 12:45:13 PM
I approve.
well, butler could kick the sh*t outta kurt russell. by JacksonsPole	Mar 13th, 2007 12:45:39 PM
don't get me wrong. escape from new york, and hell even LA, were some of my favorite flicks of all time. but after watching 300, in IMAX, last night Butler has my vote to be the next Snake Plissken. hell, they should get Snyder to direct and make an all new cult classic. BUTLER KICKS ASSS!
Today is a remake of yesterday by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:45:46 PM
with a reimagined hangover.
My next appearance in court is a remake of my last time by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:46:27 PM
only with hipper younger judge that the kids can relate to.
I am a remake of my father by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:47:37 PM
same alcoholism but with a fresher hip-hop soundtrack.
Mark Wahlberg IS Snake Plissken by Spikes Brain	Mar 13th, 2007 12:47:43 PM
In (wait for it...) ESCAPE FROM ESCAPE FROM PLANET OF THE APES!
My life is a remake of The Getaway by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:49:02 PM
only with a copy of Maxim instead of Ali McGraw and a drinking problem instead of a cunning sense of strategy and relfex.
My vomit is a remake of my breakfast by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:49:42 PM
but with better CGI and Will Smith.
Escape From Medfield: by Wyatt Wingfoot	Mar 13th, 2007 12:51:24 PM
Dexter Riley Versus Snake Plissken. To. The. DEATH!!!! Computer Gotta Wear Tennis Shoes!
300 was a remake of my last guys night out by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:51:26 PM
only with 299 more guys and in the movie they didn't get thrown out of the strip club for barfing on the stage.
I Robot: The Al Gore Story by Kloipy	Mar 13th, 2007 12:51:31 PM
GABBO
What I did to those guys who looked at me funny by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:53:17 PM
was a remake of what I did in Vietnam, only this time I was punished by the government instead of rewarded.
My new bride is a remake of my ex-wife by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:54:59 PM
only with a hip new Russian mail-order spin to appeal to those video game-playing kids.
150 million for Watchmen by AlwaysThere	Mar 13th, 2007 12:55:12 PM
You're a madman, Mr. Snyder. A madman.
funnily enough by Lost Prophet	Mar 13th, 2007 12:55:41 PM
Today seems like a remake of yesterday: went to work. Spent all day tooling about on AICN- only the topic is different. They should fire me really.
The remake of my haunting childhood is being realized by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 12:57:09 PM
in the form of flashbacks produced by Steve Soderberg.
Thunderdome by Grammaton Cleric Binks	Mar 13th, 2007 12:57:19 PM
The sheer number of responses on this talkback ought to give someone the hint that this is the best idea since New Coke. What you need to do is put Russell from Soldier, and Butler from 300 in the dome. To the victor goes the spoils. Special guest referee Ox Baker.
I've been on the bridge.. by Banditmania	Mar 13th, 2007 12:59:15 PM
what a dump.
Tank Abbott by Spikes Brain	Mar 13th, 2007 01:00:20 PM
... is a remake of Ox Baker. It's all about the beard...
Michael Bay's Kane by Samuel Fulmer	Mar 13th, 2007 01:04:05 PM
would star Kane of WWE/See No Evil fame as Charles Foster Kane. The Undertaker could play rosebud.
Not snake but maybe Solid Snake by Phategod1	Mar 13th, 2007 01:06:11 PM
I think this guy would nake a better Solid Snake then Josh Holloway but not as good as Keifer Sutherland.
Prequel to the Remake of my life by Spandau Belly	Mar 13th, 2007 01:08:18 PM
starring Jordana Brewster as the personification of my drinking problem getting its start while I was still in the womb.
Escape from Oz: Dorothy Does Dallas by Mister Man	Mar 13th, 2007 01:14:48 PM
Anyway, remakes are gonna happen...always have, always will. It's not a current trend, by any means.
Fucking Hollywood wankers. by Gilkuliehe	Mar 13th, 2007 01:15:54 PM
Leave Carpenter alone you assholes. What's next? A remake of HALLOWEEN or THE THING? Oh right. ASSHOLES! Just give the guy some money and a cool script. Consider it an investment: THis way you get to remake more movies five years from now. I hate these fuckers. (And I love Vern)
Escape from Cleveland... by rbatty024	Mar 13th, 2007 01:24:35 PM
Come on everyone wants to know what happened in Cleveland. That running gag was the only good part of Escape from LA. Plus, my home city needs the publicity. You may have escaped from New York but can you survive Cleveland?
Directors that make remakes.... by BillyPilgrim	Mar 13th, 2007 01:24:48 PM
Are visionless morons.
Bad idea....just bad. Bad. by Cellar Door	Mar 13th, 2007 01:29:54 PM
I'm glad GB is gettin his due...I've liked most everything he's been in even tho most do not (ex. Reign of Fire). But a remake of EFNY conceptually sucks on many levels. Though the idea of Escape from Earth (with Russel as Snake of course) has some microscopic merit to it...anything else in that franchise is doomed to suckage unless they extract the concept alone and make something else entirely with different characters and then reference the earlier material to earn the name "Escape from ". But even then...imagine all the out of work screenwriters trying to get original stuff looked at when the only thing seemingly greenlit are freakin remakes!! No more remakes...and leave Carpenter's early work alone...it's all classic camp (Big Trouble) or kick ass sci-fi & horror (The Thing & Halloween repsec). STOP already!!! Give an out of work screenwriter a gig for chrissakes!!
Snake on a train?? by Snikkar124	Mar 13th, 2007 01:33:58 PM
Don`t fuck with the classics
Now I'm Pissed! by Snake Foreskin	Mar 13th, 2007 01:37:24 PM
First they put me in a movie with Peter Fonda, now they want me to be played by some ninny with a speech impediment! I get no respect.
CHILDREN OF MEN!! by caravaggio	Mar 13th, 2007 01:39:02 PM
so sick of remakes. get Gerald to do a futuristic movie- an OG movie. not a fucking remake. so tired.
Why remake it? Just make Metal Gear Solid the movie by Orionsangels	Mar 13th, 2007 01:42:07 PM
Oh and here I thought I was being unique by mentioning this, grrr
TASG in....Escape From The Shitter! by BillyPilgrim	Mar 13th, 2007 01:42:14 PM
I'm not a full fledged moviephile so I don't know this but... Did folks growing up in the 40's have to watch endless horrible remakes in 60's? I just want to know when this shit started.
All the Carpenter remakes by DirkD13"	Mar 13th, 2007 01:47:33 PM
Yet the guy can't seem to get his own shit together. It's such a damn shame because Sir John Carpenter is and always will be, a legend amongst legends. I pray for his directorial comeback, when the 'yoof' of today get to experience some awesome Carpenter magic. The guy used to fart cult classics for fun, he's surely got more in him!
WTF!?!?! by cahcat	Mar 13th, 2007 01:53:56 PM
Why remake Escape From New York?! Why? Oh God Why? Remake craze will drive me to an early grave!
Words to live by by Snake Foreskin	Mar 13th, 2007 02:04:40 PM
"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do." Robert A. Heinlein
No Fcuking way by brock landers baby	Mar 13th, 2007 02:10:59 PM
Why are people even thinking of doing that???? I am sooo angry now,I'm going for a long walk to cool down.
and the real problem is by Right Bastard	Mar 13th, 2007 02:14:32 PM
as with all remakes, they will completely miss the subtle political and social commentary, and present nothing but a steaming pile of stylistic crap.
The ending of ESCAPE FROM L.A. was classic. by Gilkuliehe	Mar 13th, 2007 02:19:06 PM
The whole movie wasn't as good but it was fun. It has Bruce Campbell as a crasy plastic surgeon for fuck's sake! And what an ending. I say get Carpenter and Russel to make ESCAPE FROM EARTH after Plissken shut down the planet.
Shya le Beef (whatever) will play Snake Junior. by JackPumpkinhead	Mar 13th, 2007 02:19:54 PM
"Snake! I hate Snake!"
Right Bastard... by rbatty024	Mar 13th, 2007 02:23:46 PM
you're absolutely...um, right, I guess. Look at the Dawn of the Dead remake that just didn't understand the original. Politics don't get put into big budget films. You're only going to find politics in small genre cult classics.
Several studios? by cekma	Mar 13th, 2007 02:36:45 PM
Doesn't one studio own the rights? How can several studios be trying to get the project? Shouldn't CAA package only be pitched to those that own the material, how the hell can other studios come on board besides giving some cash and getting a some back.
Gerard can do better by Demosthenes2	Mar 13th, 2007 02:41:52 PM
He's a very good action star indeed, but unlike many action stars, he can actually handle other genres as well, and I'd hate to see him pigeonholed. Of course he's probably not complaining if the action movies rake in the cashola as they tend to do. Nevertheless, I think he's a strong enough lead to establish his own iconography rather than inherit someone else's iconography in an unasked-for remake.
No. by SebastianHaff	Mar 13th, 2007 03:17:54 PM
Just... no. To all of it. Hell no.
If they are going to remake it... by ELGordo	Mar 13th, 2007 03:20:51 PM
How are they going to top the classic scene where Snake lands on the World Trade center in his glider? Have him land on the unbuild Freedom tower or some generic skyscraper midtown Manhattan?
THIS! IS! HORSESHIT!!!!! by slappy jones	Mar 13th, 2007 03:23:38 PM
terrible terrible idea....
FUCK YOU HOLLYWOOD by misnomer	Mar 13th, 2007 03:27:32 PM
ITS BARELY 25 YEARS OLD FOR CHRIST SAKES!!!!! well...it's actually a cool movie ....and it's one that would lend itself to updating....but Ill always love the original too much.
just dont touch "They Live," "Lost Boys" & "Weird by misnomer	Mar 13th, 2007 03:33:56 PM
Science" that's all I ask. please. I mean, I'm only 23 for effs sake. Is that "old" these days? well...no. But it feels like it when all the films I cherished as a kid are being pointlessly remade. If they MUST remake this movie, just use the concept...change the title and the central character.
This remake will never happen. by slone13	Mar 13th, 2007 03:43:18 PM
It just won't.
Anybody ever seen Butler's screen test forDracula 2000? by Captain Happy	Mar 13th, 2007 03:46:45 PM
fucking heee-larious! You must see. He's wearing eyeliner...
Plissken and Burton by Playhouse	Mar 13th, 2007 03:51:54 PM
Kurt Russell nailed these guys. Two characters you definitely do not remake or recast. It would be like remaking Star Trek and casting some

Talkbacks

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