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Hey, Let’s Make A Sequel To An Artistic & Commercial Failure!! A Boll-O-Riffic BLOODRAYNE 2 Is Coming!!

Boll is better then Sex by georges garvaren	Nov 7th, 2006 11:55:27 AM
Or is it: Boll is wrose than The Clap? I never can remember.
First by decfx	Nov 7th, 2006 11:55:31 AM
Wow, 3.5 million worldwide boxoffice. 25 million production. Let's make a sequel!
Boll STAYS..!!! by havocSchultz	Nov 7th, 2006 11:56:23 AM
and I also remember him saying that he's fan of good films...but none of that has ever come through in his work either...and I'm a big fan of bowel movements - and that - would still be a better film...
Ugh. by Ellipsian	Nov 7th, 2006 11:57:04 AM
Just...ugh.
What the fuck? by PwnedByStallone	Nov 7th, 2006 12:00:03 PM
If Hollywood suits are so concerned about budgets why do they funnel money into fucking tripe like this? This money could be going to fund smaller independent films like Little Miss sunshine or Reservoir Dogs and potentially go on to make BANK. This is a sure failure. Why don't they just go to Compton and burn the money in a big bonfire on someone's lawn? CHRIST!
Damn you Michael Bay by tompiltoff	Nov 7th, 2006 12:00:56 PM
Damn!
It's those bloody Germans by georges garvaren	Nov 7th, 2006 12:02:15 PM
Why wont they learn? How many times do we have to bitch slap them till they remember to just piss right off? Possibly three times. Hmm, good idea that.
Bloodrayne was awful, but very watchable. by Some Dude	Nov 7th, 2006 12:02:53 PM
I look forward to the birth of its retarded sequel.
the plague that is the Boll... by darth sars	Nov 7th, 2006 12:04:21 PM
...CANNOT be stopped!! this man's unstoppable reign of disease and dread continues to ruin movies and career's alike. when will it end? when will someone in hollywood realize just what a complete sack of worthless fucking dung droppings this guy really is. the saying 'fool me once...' comes to mind for you 'players' in hollywood: WAKE THE FUCK UP!
Where is the money for this coming from? by jimmy_009	Nov 7th, 2006 12:09:29 PM
And how can I contact these people?
"Read More!!!"?? by Gorrister	Nov 7th, 2006 12:09:35 PM
I've read too much already!
Boll is.... by Lost Prophet	Nov 7th, 2006 12:09:51 PM
A complete and utter cunt. He really is a waste of the time his parents spent conceiving him. This is the worst idea since Mrs. Blair said "it's a boy! let's call him Anthony". There are some ideas that are simply awful on every level- vampires in the old west. What a horrid concept. Pity no-onetooktheir chance to pannel the little german wanker- "PR stunt" or not.
I look forward to seeing the same article heading ... by chrth	Nov 7th, 2006 12:10:44 PM
for Superman Returns. I kid, I kid.
i'll watch it. by The Ghost of Marcus Brody	Nov 7th, 2006 12:11:35 PM
.
We're all fans by Boba Fat	Nov 7th, 2006 12:12:05 PM
of great film makers Uwe, that's why another Boll movement from you makes our hearts sink.
something to do with tax breaks ? by ScaryJim	Nov 7th, 2006 12:14:42 PM
There must be some reason they still let him make films...
stupid foreign investors by triplefive	Nov 7th, 2006 12:15:31 PM
Boll gets all his moolah from european crime families...soon enough he's gonna default on his loans for his epic adaptation of Super Puzzle Fighter, and his mutilated body will show up in a dumpster outside of Dusseldorf aeroport
I'm just impressed... by tile_mcgillus	Nov 7th, 2006 12:15:41 PM
At a certain point you kind of just have to sit back in awe of this guy's ability to make movies. How on fucking Earth do you make a sequel to a movie that cost 25mill and only made 3mill. Seriously, how? I've heard shit about the horrible law structure over where he shoots somehow makes money for him on box office failure. It just doesn't add up. It doesn't help that he the biggest asshole on the planet (are you going to challenge me to a boxing match now that I ridiculed you Uwe?). The sooner this walking cinematic abortion dies (hopefully from something painful) the better off the world will be.
The second game was shit, as well!!! by James_O'Nasty	Nov 7th, 2006 12:15:56 PM
Total shit...graphics were cleaner but it still sucked!!!!
So money is poured into a sequel to a flop by Johnno	Nov 7th, 2006 12:17:00 PM
One that's sure to do badly... but no Halo??? I'm no Halo fan, but c'mon...
what?!? WHAT?!? HOWWWWWW?!?! by godzillasushi	Nov 7th, 2006 12:19:26 PM
Seriously, the other one made what, 3 dollars? WTF?!? How stupid do these people have to be to give this guy more money to make more movies. Oh but, shoot, LOOK OUT FOR THE WILD WEST. Like that is some sort of awesome idea. YARRRRR
WELL by THE KNIGHT	Nov 7th, 2006 12:22:52 PM
Looks like i'm late to the party.... I luckily haven't seen the movie but jeez "I'M TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT!"
EPIPHANY! I figured it out!!! by Nodwick	Nov 7th, 2006 12:25:02 PM
It's the video game industry behind this. Hear me out: Video games compete for your entertainment dollar. As part of that campaign, they take their most popular properties and make INTENTIONALLY crappy movies in an effort to drive more people away from theaters and into their living rooms, controllers in hand. It's BRILLIANT!
Oh, come on... by Porcoddena	Nov 7th, 2006 12:25:28 PM
Fuck you all guys, you must be fucking kiddin' me, BloodRayne wasn't THAT bad! Is a sequel to BR a bad idea? What about the House of the Dead sequel, then?
How is this happening? by DanielKurland	Nov 7th, 2006 12:29:31 PM
This makes no sense, when Lynch and Allen need to fucking struggle for funding, and he is off making sequels to films no one saw to begin with. Furthermore, how did he get Liotta?
Hasn't Harry... by Boba Fat	Nov 7th, 2006 12:33:00 PM
got a Vampire Western in developement? If I'm right, he might as well wipe his ass on that script, 90 pages should do it. How can he hope to match the Boll?
Uwe Boll's Tetris: The Movie by Spandau Belly	Nov 7th, 2006 12:33:19 PM
Square block - Michael Clarke Duncan Long skinny block - Mischa Barton T block - Jason Statham Z block - Sophie Howard L block - Sean Penn President Putin - Daniel Craig
Gah by Chilli815	Nov 7th, 2006 12:35:38 PM
Everyone bitches about Boll, but I bet at least 25% of y'all here who bitch about him have either paid for, or sat through without cost, one of his films, and then give the guy fodder. Me, I avoid the guy because his films sound crap, and concentrate on writing my own stuff instead of whining about the opportunities that people like Boll get. God, wannabe creative people piss me off!
The money comes from Europe... and probably terrorism by modlight	Nov 7th, 2006 12:36:11 PM
Because aren't his movies a form of terrorism in themselves? But seriously. Anyone who gets (or steals from the office) Variety or the Hollywood Reporter knows that a couple times a year they do a Foreign Market issue in which there are about 50 pages of movies that you have never nor will ever hear of. Full page ads taken out for movies starring Michael Dudikof and Richard Greico with horribly photoshopped covers splattered all over. My guess is that in foreign markets they say "Hallo Blickosh, this is big in America, you'll love it". I think this because Americans fall for it too. I was in London this past spring and started talking movies with this guy and we realized that America gets a lot of those movies from them. Kinky Boots came to mind. When I asked him about that he had only marginally heard of it. Apparently after Billy Elliot and the Full Monty they just shuffle off a quirky British "prestige" picture on the states and never release it there. Anyways... long post for a TB on a frickin Boll Movie. Sorry.
ASSASINATION...ITS THE ONLY WAY TO BE SURE by 1GAZZA	Nov 7th, 2006 12:39:40 PM
Boll challenged all-comers in the boxing ring (and won!). My suggestion is someone takes out a contract on order to sort him out once and for all. A High velocity rifle with laser sighting and dum dum bullets at 100 metres should do the trick! Jesus! Knowing that several millions of dollars is going to be wasted on his next attempt- doesn't it make ya sick that there are people going hungry in the World?! Lets get Sir Bob Geldof to campaign for a new Band Aid concert using the proposed financing for this Satanic enterprise!
I've never seen any Boll movie. by Gilkuliehe	Nov 7th, 2006 12:41:40 PM
But I'm jumping on this wagon. DAMN THOSE IDIOT MONEY PEOPLE!!! Hey that was fun.
I'm no fan of Boll but.. by The Funketeer	Nov 7th, 2006 12:43:15 PM
You guys are too quick to dismiss a movie as a flop because you don't like it. Just because a movie doesn't make money at the U.S. box office doesn't mean that it doesn't turn a profit. Overseas ticket sales for movies like this and DVD and video sales can often make a nice chunk of change for a crappy little action movie. Also consider that smaller studios don't feel the need to make hundreds of millions of dollars on every picture. A 10 million dollar profit is still 10 million dollars in the bank.
How he does it... by idahomer	Nov 7th, 2006 12:43:50 PM
Boll continues to secure investors for the rights to future video-game-to-movie adaptations. His investors are mostly German. He carefully secures the rights for potential future adaptations, afterwards doing all of the actual production himself, and finishes the product. Movies directed by Boll have not achieved the kind of box office returns one expects from a typical Hollywood film.[citation needed] The House of the Dead (budget: $12 million[1] ) broke $5.73 million on opening weekend, Alone in the Dark made over $5.1 million (budget: $20 million[2] ), and BloodRayne (budget: $25 million[3] ) topped $2.42 million. In the DVD commentary of Alone in the Dark, Boll explains how he funds his films: "Maybe you know it but it's not so easy to finance movies in total. And the reason I am able to do these kind of movies is I have a tax shelter fund in Germany, and if you invest in a movie in Germany you get basically fifty percent back from the Government." Boll is able to acquire funding thanks to German tax laws that reward investments in film. The law allows investors in German-owned films to write off 100% of their investment as a tax deduction; it also allows them to invest borrowed money and write off any fees associated with the loan. The investor is then only required to pay taxes on the profits made by the movie; if the movie loses money, the investor gets a tax writeoff. http://tinyurl.com/qodzr
Why is he avoiding the Nazis? by Dannychico	Nov 7th, 2006 12:49:15 PM
I don't get it.
Ze Germans by jeah	Nov 7th, 2006 12:49:45 PM
A few asked a very valid question as to how in Gods green earth does he aquire the money to make these million dollar turds year after year. Here is our “how to screw the economy” lesson for the day boys and girls. He resides in Germany and is therefore able to gain funding according to German tax laws that reward investments in film. Since his films are German-owned they are allowed a write off of 100% of their investment as a tax deduction. They can also borrow money and write off any fees associated with the loan. At this point the investor is only supposed to pay taxes on the profits made by the movie, but if the movie loses money, which is the case of every film he makes, he is allowed a complete tax writeoff. Conclusion: He will continue to degrade any project that crosses that psychotic ridiculous disgrace of a mind of his and be backed up by foreign laws and regulations. Moral: If you have no idea what you're doing in the world of film making but know you can create a first class piece of Scheiße, go move to Germany, there lies opportunity. Man, I wish one of those critics would have pulverized that lunatic in that ridiculous boxing match a few months back. God bless America!
HAHHA idahomer... so basically, its The Producers by modlight	Nov 7th, 2006 12:50:54 PM
He is setting out to make a flop. Wow.
The trailers to a Boll movie tells everything... by tile_mcgillus	Nov 7th, 2006 12:52:20 PM
I don't to sit through a Sandra Bullock vehicle to know I'm going to hate it. After seeing the trailer for every movie Boll has made I know that there is no way I could ever make it through a movie. We should talk about what could be done in this world to better it with that money: Build schools for children to learn in. Give aid to starving people. Donate that money to disease research. Build an abused woman's shelter. The list goes on and on. Thanks Uwe Boll for letting those little children die.
Come on admit it... by Lucasblows	Nov 7th, 2006 01:12:43 PM
...we all love Uwe Boll! Killing a shitty movie is more fun than praising a good one! And who gives us more fodder than Dr. Boll? I hope then make Bloodrayne 3 in outer space fighting Vampire Alien Lesbians from Venus!
When was the last time a niche film got mentioned on by emeraldboy	Nov 7th, 2006 01:25:21 PM
this site. Uwe Boll makes niche film for a niche market. There are or at least there must people who like his films. This Boll person is probably rolling in it and at the same time laughing at the people who have never made a movie in thier lives. The press can be quite elite-ist as can the online press be some times. At least boll knows his limits as a filmmaker and he probably knows that he will never win and oscar. He probably has nice car and nice house with swimming pool. When was the last time you heard a filmmaker challenge anyone to a boxing match. I am quite frankly amazed by the stuff on this site. On the one hand here is guy making film out of videos. and your rain on his parade all the time. on the other there people like singer or ratner who cant get a break either. every film they make or if it is announced they are going to make it is same thing all over again. "signer must be gay" or "ratner is a hack" or damn you...... or attacking movie execs like avi arad or rothman. or wheedon. I dont remember the last I was on this and the talkback was unanimously if favour of a film. All this site has become is a giant whine. Or an excuse for Harry tell us about why he likes the cheerleader in heroes, which was the most disgusting that I have read. I usually skim down through harry's articles cause they are BS anyways.
He's a big fan of Ford alright... by FilmCritic3000	Nov 7th, 2006 01:32:10 PM
He thinks his company makes fine cars. Can someone please let this guy only make shitty TV movies in his homeland and stop foisting his non-existent talent on us?!
Can't believe none of you understand... by TBelich	Nov 7th, 2006 01:35:53 PM
...what Boll is trying to do for us! Think about it. He make these movies that get us to the point where staying home and staring at our water damaged walls for two hours is more fun right? So we SAVE money and have MORE FUN! He wants us to get out there and appreciate the little things...like the wall thing.
a brush with Boll by Spandau Belly	Nov 7th, 2006 01:38:50 PM
When I was a teenager I took a job working at a local arcade. The money wasn't shit, but hell, it was about being around the games. One day Uwe Boll came in and climbed up on the Revolution X machine and started adapting it into a movie. Everybody loved it! I got up on the machine and did a little adaptation of Dig Dug with him and he said one word: 'vunderbar'. Vunderbar meant good, as in Alone in the Dark, not great, as in House of Dead. Vunderbar meant call me when you are... But then I found a bottle of Schlitz and some Run DMC albums in the dumpster out back and that dream just faded away...
Careful fella's... by beefywhore	Nov 7th, 2006 01:42:24 PM
Uwe Will fight each and every one of us if we don't watch our P's and Q's...
Chilli815 by godzillasushi	Nov 7th, 2006 01:45:23 PM
Were you taking shots at the TBers or Boll? You confused me. If it was the TBers, then ill tell you what I think.
Heh...Boll wins again. by Childe Roland	Nov 7th, 2006 01:52:05 PM
Part of me is convinced that he no longer makes these movies to see them made or to fulfill some creative itch of his. He does it because he can and to see the reaction (like the guys from Jackass). I'm sure of it. And he revels in our disgust. We're feeding the monster we helped to make (by being such avid video gamers and typing about how much we'd love to see certain movies as films). He hates us and he loves to see us suffer. That beautiful Nazi bastard.
BOTCHED JOKE!! by JimmyLoneWolf	Nov 7th, 2006 02:13:02 PM
The next "too soon"!!
I can't believe people didn't jump down my throat by chrth	Nov 7th, 2006 02:25:51 PM
for the Superman Returns comment. I'm sorely disappointed in you lot.
godzillasushi/Chirt by Chilli815	Nov 7th, 2006 02:37:13 PM
I'm taking shots at TB'ers who bitch about Boll, but in turn give him more publicity. Truth be told, I have no problem if he's making films, it merely reinforces that anyone can do it, and makes the criticism of him pointless. Want to make something better, go ahead - it's possible! I dug Superman Returns.
Ruining the Games by dundundles	Nov 7th, 2006 02:40:18 PM
I think the sadder thing is not that he can keep making movies, but that he is killing potentially great horror franchises. I loved playing the Bloodrayne games. When I heard a film was going to be made, and with Kristanna Loken, I fucking flipped out. The first game was so cool with the nazis, swamp zombies, and flying backbone worm guys (Fuck you guys, I liked it!!). So it depresses me that I will now probably never see a decent movie about this story.
Well I disagree with your first comment by godzillasushi	Nov 7th, 2006 02:48:56 PM
but in order to avoid a TB battle, ill just crawl away and let this one go. ;)
I'm sorry, but... by rbatty024	Nov 7th, 2006 03:02:13 PM
Alone in the Dark was fucking hilarious. His movies are awful, but they're damn funny. Has anyone seen the preview for that Dungeon Siege movie? Now that's comedy.
Hulk Hogan as the Baddie by Bob_Loblaw_Jr	Nov 7th, 2006 03:10:57 PM
I'm Uwe Boll's bitch brotha!
Take off and NUKE THE STUDIO from orbit ... by Corwin_X2	Nov 7th, 2006 03:16:02 PM
... THAT's the only way to be sure. With apologies to 1GAZZA above ;-)
He`s using cursed Rhinegold by Wyrdy the Gerbil	Nov 7th, 2006 03:19:47 PM
Thats why everything made with it is fucking shit
I don't understand it. by Chief Redcock	Nov 7th, 2006 03:21:21 PM
Boll's movies are fun to laugh at... but we don't need any more of them than we've got. He also missed a prime opportunity to put Nazis in the movie.
With the kind of returns the first one made ... by Corwin_X2	Nov 7th, 2006 03:26:42 PM
... Boll must have some bitchin' photos of someone high up doing something either highly illegal or obscenely immoral! Don't those figures usually result in security accidentally falling you down some stairs if you set foot on studio property again?
OH JESUS CHRIST by scrivener	Nov 7th, 2006 03:32:20 PM
KILL ME NOW
What about... by ArtemisClydefrog	Nov 7th, 2006 03:41:12 PM
giving some other shit director money for a sequel? I'd actually dig Pitof redeeming Catwoman with a sequel to Vidoq.
Uhghh, just, ughhh by JunoFallon	Nov 7th, 2006 03:54:22 PM
When is someone going to stop letting this cinematicaly challenged goon waste their money. Every time someone announces another of his films it pisses me off to no end. This clown is the Ed Wood of our time, though I think Ed Woods movies were better...
BOLL by derekfarquhar	Nov 7th, 2006 04:04:28 PM
lets try something different, why don't we not talk about his new movie at all and see how well it does, ignore him and all his stunts and focus on something with a bit more quality that deserves our conversation
YAAAAAY---A UWE BOLL TB!!!!! by No Talent Ass Clown	Nov 7th, 2006 04:07:32 PM
It's about time. Shit was getting boring around here. Flame on!!! (and fuck u uwe)
Fuck Boll! I win! by Childe Roland	Nov 7th, 2006 04:09:58 PM
As it happens, Brit and K-Fed got married on the same day my wife and I did (she also delivered her first kid within a week of ours, meaning we got preggers art roughly the same time) and a friend of mine jokingly bet that their marriage would last longer than ours. I am now $50 richer and would like to invest my winnings in the next Uwe Boll project. Call me, Uwe.
hello by derekfarquhar	Nov 7th, 2006 04:16:42 PM
Hi what you guys consider a good movie compared to a uwe Boll movie and don not say anything !!
BUT seriously by cockrockinbeatz	Nov 7th, 2006 04:18:37 PM
Does anyone know how this got bankrolled? I am honestly curious. Did it just absolutely rock cocks on DVD? I remember seeing it was packaged with the PC version of the game...maybe that got a shitload of tards to buy it.
bankrolled by derekfarquhar	Nov 7th, 2006 04:21:51 PM
it must have been off Uwes last fight,or the German goverment are trying to conquer Americas film industry
"... A Sequel To An Artistic & Commercial Failure!" by Mockingbird Girl	Nov 7th, 2006 04:22:17 PM
A comment that could equally apply to today's announcement of a sequel to Ang Lee's HULK. I mean, WTF?
Coming Soon: Plan 9 from Outer Space - "re-imagined" by Corwin_X2	Nov 7th, 2006 04:35:56 PM
.
Will this site ever work properly? by 3 Bag Enema	Nov 7th, 2006 04:39:24 PM
Can someone please fix the front page so I don't have to scroll up and down a thousand times just to read the magically disappearing headlines? It's absurd.
There are fimmakers with more talent in their taint by CTU Mole	Nov 7th, 2006 04:42:56 PM
than Uwe Boll has in his entire braut fed body who will never get to have their stuff seen and yet he still walks the earth. I mean how the fuck can you make a sex scene with a vampire terminatrix UNsexy?
Check out Rue Morgue by micbenxyy	Nov 7th, 2006 04:56:36 PM
Check out the current issue of Rue Morgue for an explanation of why Uwe Bolle continues to make films. It seems that he returns a profit to his German investors before filming even starts for each film. He happens to be a bad director, but a good business man.
honestly... by fannypacoderus	Nov 7th, 2006 05:01:37 PM
id rather be raped by a unicorn than watch this piece
Bloodrayne wasn't too bad! by CyberBeavis1326	Nov 7th, 2006 05:02:26 PM
It was a good little B-movie. Although not resembling the game, but it wasn't as awful as this site made it to be. It was basically the equivalent of the best Sci-fi channel original movie. However a sequel in a western setting, sounds truly odd. Almost like making a Terminator 4, but setting it in 12th century Asia.
Ze Germans... by -=7=-	Nov 7th, 2006 05:09:50 PM
...are not entirely sure if Boll isn't Austrian. Therefore we (Ze Germans) plan on banning him to the Netherlands for being guilty of reheally bad fucking public relations!
the only reason Boll is even allowed to make films.... by W3bzpinn3r	Nov 7th, 2006 05:10:19 PM
Is coz of German tax shelters. German tax shelters allow crap like this to be made, and the financiers can write it off risk-free, as long as the movie DOESN'T make money, and the movie is made by german crews and with german companies. If the movie makes a profit, the financiers actually lose money.
Movies that are only good compared to a Boll movie... by Childe Roland	Nov 7th, 2006 05:12:42 PM
...include, but are certainly not limited to: Alien vs. Predator Amityville Horror, the (original or remake) Brown Bunny, The Bug Busters Chaos Death Machine Feast Fog, The (remake) Godfather III Highlander II House II, The Second Story Mansquito Neverending Story II, The Nothing But Trouble Sleepaway Camp Star Wars, Episodes I-III & VI Trapped in Paradise I could go on, but I fear I'd sink into a deep depression upon realizing just how much of my life I've wasted on shit films.
"Wasn't too bad" by Phategod2	Nov 7th, 2006 05:13:30 PM
one word desribes Bloodrayne CLUSTERFUCK.
German Money by Bruce_the_Shark	Nov 7th, 2006 05:18:46 PM
German law no longer allows people to write off investment in films through so-called private film funds, which is how Boll used to raise money up until last year. And it wasn't just scheiss films that were made using private fund money. In fact, most of that coin went to finance Hollywood movies like Lord of the Rings, I Robot, Terminator 3, Mission: Impossible II, The Bourne Supremacy, Alexander and The Lord of War, just to name a few. Having said that, Boll is a wily and clever fellow and no doubt has plenty of financial trickery up his sleeve. He recently went public in order to raise money for further company growth. All hail Boll.
content sigh by UweBollocks	Nov 7th, 2006 05:41:31 PM
I live for Boll talkbacks
Uwe Boll fondled my ball sac... by TheUglyBaby	Nov 7th, 2006 05:48:45 PM
Now that I have your attention.... WHO THE FUCK ARE THE INBRED STUDIO HEADS WHO ARE GREENLIGHTING ANY FUCKING PROJECT WITH BOLL ATTACHED TO THEM? I WOULD RATHER SEE CHARLTON HESTON GET A COFFEE ENEMA THAN SEE BLOODTAYNE 2... ....UNLESS THERE WILL BE SHAVED POONANNY IN IT.
I really like Boll's movies by Ralije	Nov 7th, 2006 05:51:15 PM
Boll's movies are balls to the wall hilarious. They even have some pretty decent action and actual blood on the screen. Fuck Underworld and shit like AvP that give us PG13 action. I want some motherfucker to be bleeding. I want some titties. I want some lowbrow humor. Uwe Boll makes movies that are fucking hilarious to watch. I'd rather take a Boll film that is fun and doesn't give a shit about what anyone thinks than some overproduced piece of shit borefest like the Covenant or shit like that. You are all the same fucking nerds that havn't touched a woman and think Tarentino's dialogue is funny and smart. You're the same losers that thought Revenge of the Sith was a good movie. You all jump on Boll because he's an internet meme and it makes you all feel special. Go ahead and do that while watching your anime, fucking losers.
Let's face it... by CallMeX	Nov 7th, 2006 06:04:28 PM
There is no cure for the UweBoll-a virus. You watch it, get sick, and die.
FUCK! by alienindisguise	Nov 7th, 2006 06:09:28 PM
As a struggling filmmaker, it's shit like this that makes we want to hunt down that sorry ass bastard and stomp his skull in...let him do another "boxing challenge" but have it open to the public...I'll be first in line!
The Phantom Menace Rules Bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by Orionsangels	Nov 7th, 2006 06:21:46 PM
Deal with it! Star Wars owns you!!!!!!! Oh shit...what thu, Ugh, I just woke up from a bad hang over. I thought it was 7 years ago.
The Good Doctor Boll by Mechasheeva	Nov 7th, 2006 06:25:50 PM
has given me hours of entertainment. When I'm stoned out of my mind with my friends, few things are more entertaining than giggling hysterically at his "movies." By the way, anyone see the pictures of Postal? It features Osama Bin Laden as a character, apparently played some guy with a very, very fake-looking beard. Awesome.
NooooooooooooOOOOOOOO!!!!! by HailDaHypnoToad	Nov 7th, 2006 06:28:29 PM
The Horror, THE HORROR!!! Although it pains me to make any reference to an incredible actor like Brando while discussing Uwe( A 20 year old Blind dog with shingles and 3 legs could make a better movie than me) Boll. Or is that BOWL as in TOILET?
NooooooooooooOOOOOOOO!!!!! by HailDaHypnoToad	Nov 7th, 2006 06:29:05 PM
The Horror, THE HORROR!!! Although it pains me to make any reference to an incredible actor like Brando while discussing Uwe( A 20 year old Blind dog with shingles and 3 legs could make a better movie than me) Boll. Or is that BOWL as in TOILET?
The real reason... by TheDudeinLA	Nov 7th, 2006 06:46:25 PM
I asked Boll's distributor...whom is the same as a director I work for...the answer...his movies make money! I don't see how...but they do....it really is that simple. And it SUCKS!
Looks left by the_shogun_gunslinger	Nov 7th, 2006 06:47:04 PM
looks right AH! heres my gun! SWEET DEATH, RELEASE MEEEE!!!!!" why...why after 3 million WORLDWIDE is this man allowed anywhere near a film set?! he must give great head...and anyone who says his movies are enjoyable...just go hang yourself, plz
Nooooooooooooo by Archduke_Chocula	Nov 7th, 2006 06:48:13 PM
......ooooooooooooooooooo!
Whatever the reason... by MonkeyManReturns	Nov 7th, 2006 06:54:32 PM
The idea sucks. It doesn't matter whether or not the movie gets made. The movie men just don't give a damn about entertainment, they only care about money (the two should really go hand in hand). Thats why crap like this, and Superman Returns gets made - yes, supes was utter nonsense, a complete waste of time, waste of talent, and a poor movie with no concept of what good story telling is...supes has a kid (?), Kal Penn not used, Lex Luthor - amateur local theatre villian, Luthor can grow new land (thats drama???)and kate bosworth...urgh, don't get me started on that poor poor casting...oh and Uwe Boll must be laughing his socks off...he actually has fans judging by some of the comments above...I guess there really is no accounting for taste...
sergio leone and john ford come back from the dead by Nazzim O'Bazzim	Nov 7th, 2006 07:11:08 PM
EXT. NIGHT. DESERT. The great filmmakers, now hideous zombies, shamble towards the little desert town where Uwe Boll is filming his latest. SERGIO LEONE ZOMBIE: Graaahh!!! Want start with make extreme closeup of Boll's face, slightly distorted. We watch slowly as single bead of sweat trickle down his head. He hear us howling on soundtrack. It sound like "Aiaiaiaiaaaahhh" JOHN FORD ZOMBIE: Arrrghhh, Graaah! Cut to impressive vista of Monument Valley. See us coming over top of mesa, horrible forms backlit. Waving tomahawks. Gotta have tomahawks. Me always thought Injuns were scary. SERGIO LEONE ZOMBIE: ( getting excited ) Urggh! Urhgghhh! Yes, then see quick edit shot of tomahawks hitting Boll! Fast juxtaposition take you by surprise! Hurrr.. growl. JOHN FORD ZOMBIE: Then get John Wayne zombie to punch him.
Where do Boll's movie's make money, TheDudeinLA? by CTU Mole	Nov 7th, 2006 07:42:23 PM
In Germany? Cause they don't in America. Oh and Ralije, come back when they drop, you fucking child.
How bout we all challenge Boll to a duel... by BRUTICUS	Nov 7th, 2006 07:44:19 PM
.........AT THE SAME TIME; hed love that
Deutsche tax shelters - $$$ only if the film bombs? by Corwin_X2	Nov 7th, 2006 07:46:47 PM
Was someone in the German treasury dept some manic Mel Brooks fan or something? I know our German cousins have a rep for having a somewhat off-kilter sense of humor. But taking their cue from The Producers is a bit of a stretch.
How about funding me 500 grand........ by Doc_Strange	Nov 7th, 2006 07:47:10 PM
So I can buy a fucking shack in Los Angeles? I want to know who's fucking stupid enough to put up 25 million dollars to fund this shit. And I also want to know where I can go to make 25 million dollars and be stupid as fuck as well. Damn.
First Question: Who gives a shit? by HorseApples	Nov 7th, 2006 07:56:37 PM
It's not like he said he was remaking The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly or Rio Fucking Grande, he's making a shitty sequel to a shitty movie based on a shitty video game. That's what Uwe Boll does. Did anyone have high hopes that BloodRayne 2 would be the next project for Spielberg or Scorsese (if so, then kill yourself)? Pick your fucking battles and find something good to complain about. And then answer to the "How did he get funded for this when kids are starving" question should be obvious: He sold one of Tara Reid's mangled tits to an Alone in the Dark afficionado.
what have we done to deserve this punishment by mikey mike	Nov 7th, 2006 08:24:10 PM
what pray tell
I don't understand all the hatred for Boll. by rbatty024	Nov 7th, 2006 08:35:10 PM
It's not like he's taking good projects from good directors. He's making shitty movies out of shitty videogames. I guess I could understand someone's disappointment if they were a fan of the videogame, but other than that situation the amount of hatred baffles me. Sure, there are more talented people out there, but blame Hollywood for not giving them a chance, not Uwe Boll.
The whole point of his movies is to lose money by Bazka Berzerker	Nov 7th, 2006 09:14:51 PM
The whole German tax write-off law that Boll abuses is based on the NEED to lose money with his films. His investors benefit when the films lose money, they wouldn't benefit if the films would make money. So essentially the entire point for Boll is to make sure that his movies make as little money as possible, because that's what his inventors one. It's a crazy system, but that's how it goes.
My new dream by Neo Technic	Nov 7th, 2006 09:14:58 PM
I'm going to become a renowned boxer and a German citzen. Than I'm going to make shitty video game movies so that no one will see them and I can exploit the government loop holes. Sweet baby Buddha, thats a good idea. I don't even have to be creative, just steal someones elses idea and than spit my bloody stool all over it. In the meantime, movies that would make bank like Halo, will get sidelined and the studios will point to crapfest terds like the ones I make as the reason why.
Uwe Boll Raped my Video Games! by Datascream	Nov 7th, 2006 10:05:14 PM
so when can I expect Bloodrayne: The Movie: The Videogame?
boll sucks. obviously. but... by JacksonsPole	Nov 7th, 2006 10:50:09 PM
he's got some savvy. he knows how to structure film deals. he knows how to make money on these crap films. as for bloodrayne, it flopped in theatres; but, made money through video and PPV sales. say what you want. i hate the man's films, but admire his balls and money sense. and as for all the people you complain about not getting their chances, well tough titty. boll worked his ass off to get to make these 'films'. you must create your own opportunities. you can't cry about boll. use him as an example. not in filmmaking, PLEASE! but, in financing. create your own career. don't bitch. do.
Boll is better then Sex ...is what? by half vader	Nov 8th, 2006 12:05:09 AM
Georges, are you baiting Leedrick again?
wtf, this motherfucker for real? by Garetjax	Nov 8th, 2006 12:09:53 AM
thos bitch was bragging that he got kingsly for something like 20grand, and even with all the star power he still fucks it up. a buddy of mine tole me that he is tired of folks bashing him and challenges any one to a boxing match who has a problem with his "work". does he even look at his finished product? boll and ws anderson should really go fuck each other and stay the fuck outta the movie business.
Uwe should run a studio by Neo Zeed	Nov 8th, 2006 12:14:13 AM
and give new, more talented filmakers a shot with the genre stuff. He's obviously a magician with the money, so he should give put it to good use.
fuck you boll, i'll fight you RIGHT NOW by Bob C. Cock	Nov 8th, 2006 12:32:38 AM
and i won't puss around like mirajeff, i'll put you on the ground you asshole
I gaurantee Uwe Boll won't fight me. by TokyoZ	Nov 8th, 2006 12:37:59 AM
I'm well over his weight limit, the pussy fights skinny nerds. Someone please assassinate this asshole already.
now that i finished my rant....... by Garetjax	Nov 8th, 2006 12:43:14 AM
isn't there a video game about vampires in the west already, "nightwatch" or something like that? i remember playing it on ps2. any way, why dosen't boll broker the deal for a director with some real tallent, he can even charge a fee, he wins, we win, the movie world win, and all is good. by the way, before anyone beats this post down, this is bloodrayne1 was the only one of boll's flms that i have ever seen, and if you are supposed to get better with experience, i don't even want to see his other films. except dungeon seige, i am hopping it works out, hell if it turns out better than dungeons and dgragons, he did good.
now that i finished my rant....... by Garetjax	Nov 8th, 2006 12:43:31 AM
isn't there a video game about vampires in the west already, "nightwatch" or something like that? i remember playing it on ps2. any way, why dosen't boll broker the deal for a director with some real tallent, he can even charge a fee, he wins, we win, the movie world win, and all is good. by the way, before anyone beats this post down, this is bloodrayne1 was the only one of boll's flms that i have ever seen, and if you are supposed to get better with experience, i don't even want to see his other films. except dungeon seige, i am hopping it works out, hell if it turns out better than dungeons and dragons, he did good.
yeah.. id box boll too.. BUT by fannypacoderus	Nov 8th, 2006 02:03:27 AM
he
yeah.. id box boll too.. BUT by fannypacoderus	Nov 8th, 2006 02:04:33 AM
hes such a vanija he wont box anyone is his weight class... fuck this tool... waste of type space he is..
Dear Dr. Boll by Seph_J	Nov 8th, 2006 02:14:16 AM
You are a personal hero of mine.
I can honestly say by Yellowguy21	Nov 8th, 2006 02:26:04 AM
that I have not seen ONE of Mr. Boll's movies. Why? Cause I'm a gamer. Gamers don't want to watch their franchises get shat on. Well, you can shit on Bloodrayne, it's not very good anyway. I just don't want to hear that Uwe Boll is making Metal Gear Solid. I think I would cry. :(
He needs to be ignored ... by bender7	Nov 8th, 2006 02:28:28 AM
... rather than talked about. Seriously, hating this guy doesn't work. AICN shoudln't even post about him, no one should review his movies, no one mention him in any way and hopefully he will fade away
How wrong is it that when I read "box boll" I thought: by chrth	Nov 8th, 2006 05:36:54 AM
"Uwe Boll is a Cylon?!?"
It made it's money overseas by Dazzler69	Nov 8th, 2006 06:35:23 AM
Thus a sequel.
Awesome! I'm there, front row by Goatboy	Nov 8th, 2006 06:36:23 AM
Oh...I thought the story was about Boll boxing kangaroos whilst "Reign in Blood" rocked out on the soundtrack. Bugger.
Hey more nude Loken, the better by Pipple	Nov 8th, 2006 08:33:52 AM
I have no problem with this.
Only if by Purgatori	Nov 8th, 2006 09:08:01 AM
it has either A. A drunk Madsen or B. Michele Rodriguez trying to do a British accent. Also, if he'd allowed women to fight him I would have done it. Because I would have waited for the bell to ring and threat of lawsuit or jail aside, I would have kicked him square in the balls as soon as the chance presented himself. None of these guys did that, and I wonder why? Is it a guy thing that you won't kick another guys scrot? Hey, whatever happened to that piece of shit Dungeon Seige movie with crazy eyed Ray Liota and Burt Reynolds as the king of Scotland??
The real problem... by sarahtheburninator	Nov 8th, 2006 09:10:10 AM
Is that this is months-old 'news'!
NOT SOON ENOUGH!! by StarBlitzer	Nov 8th, 2006 09:32:19 AM
My wait was not in vain. ^_^
I'll be there! by Cablecasual	Nov 8th, 2006 09:45:51 AM
What can I say...having watched House of the Dead and Alone in the Dark, me and some friends are very much looking forward to Bloodrayne coming out in the UK. Say what you like but his movies but they make the perfect accompaniment to some beers and a fatty. Even better when enjoyed with recreational shroomage. So many paople out there make bad films, at least his fall into the Ed Wood bad but fun because of it category. As a fan of Horror I have sat through so many films that are far worse than anything churned out by the good doctor (Skinned Deep anyone?). I hope he continues to work and I shall continue to watch, although not in the cinema as he is more in the straight to dvd category over here.
Boll is not completely stupid! by Lang The Cat	Nov 8th, 2006 10:19:21 AM
As an artist and filmmaker, Boll is utter trash, however to give him his due, he does know how to use the existing tax laws in Germany brilliantly. This is a major reason for his being able to get investors. German Movie Companies have such a huge tax advantage Boll can easily raise the money. So if one of the posters above is correct and he is getting money from organized crime, then the tax benefits allow him to launder the money lost through the German government. That part struck me as sadly brilliant. Of Course, I still want to beat 90 minutes of my life out of him for having seen House of The Dead.
Son_of_Sam, please... by Childe Roland	Nov 8th, 2006 11:00:55 AM
...stop. Really. It's mildly amusing when the originator of that running gag repeats it, but pretty annoying when someone else does it (like whne frat boys started doing "I'm Rick James, Bitch!"). Just let it be amusing without your help. Thank you.
I'm Rick James, Bitch! by godzillasushi	Nov 8th, 2006 11:38:46 AM
I'm Rick James, Bitch!
Actually im not Rick James, Bitch! by godzillasushi	Nov 8th, 2006 11:39:52 AM
Actually im not Rick James, Bitch!
astonished by reckni	Nov 8th, 2006 12:06:17 PM
i was half-hoping this was a cruel joke, apparently not. i finally had my first boll experience, watched house of the dead on sci-fi. safe to say it was a complete piece of shit. what was up with the video game footage randomly thrown in?
half vader by georges garvaren	Nov 8th, 2006 12:50:07 PM
Would I do something as desperate as that? Of course I would; didn't work though. The typo however, was just that - retardedness.
Uwe Boll as actor in Zombiegeddon? by Cruel_Kingdom	Nov 8th, 2006 01:45:24 PM
Has anyone seen this? Is he any good in it?
Get your facts straight guys! by ghostlight72	Nov 8th, 2006 02:06:29 PM
1) Bloodrayne's budget was 14 million not 20 2) It made money in foreign DVD sales. 3) Part of the reason the theatrical release only made 3 million was because the release was screwed up by the distribution company owned by Billy Zane who is now being sued for it. 4) Uwe does hire newbies and give opportunities - the guys who are writing Bloodrayne 2 are new to the scene. 5) Kristanna Loken isn't in it. She's off doing Painkiller Jane TV series. Natassia Malthe (Typhoid Mary "Elektra") is the new Rayne. 7) Budget for Bloodrayne 2 is around 3.5 million and its not being funded by German tax shelters but by Universal and Canadian tax credits. 8) Uwe WILL be doing Nazis and vampires and it's called Bloodrayne 3 so hold your horses and just be patient. Aintitcool guys: Try doing a little research rather than just inciting your talkbackers. It's lazy reporting. Talkbackers: It's one thing to criticise a shitty movie (AFTER you've seen it maybe????) but some of the personal attacks thrown out on here are disgusting. Shame on you.
The only redeeming quality of this movie...... by Briannicus	Nov 8th, 2006 03:49:06 PM
Will be Natassia Malthe as Rayne (she's yummylicious) To do a video game movie, all people involved int he film should be forced to play and beat each game (Bloodrayne 1 and 2 in this case) That way they "might" actually have a better feel for the source material. But this IS Uwe Boll we're talking about so.... At any rate, Bloodrayne is NOT the type of movie to be done on a shoe string budget.
In theaters soon... UWE BOLL'S TAINT! by TheUglyBaby	Nov 8th, 2006 04:06:35 PM
....And people would pay $10 a person on a Saturday night to see it
give me douche chills by Schih Thayde	Nov 8th, 2006 04:07:13 PM
"when there are so many creative people out there struggling to catch a break"? Are you fucking kidding? Most of those fabled "creative people out there struggling" suck ass too, they just haven't had Boll's fortune.
I think an apology is owed to "Van Helsing" fans by LaDracul	Nov 8th, 2006 04:30:27 PM
Quite unfair that the shitty vamp movie gets a sequel, but they kept making "Blade" movies. Again, chimps in suits.
Has any Brit on here ever said "Boll-ocks"? by 'Cholera's Ghost	Nov 8th, 2006 04:32:50 PM
Surely.
Re: Metalwater by onemanarmy	Nov 8th, 2006 05:25:22 PM
"Uwe Boll and Quentin Taranitno are clearly competing with each other in an attempt to be crown worst film maker of all time. " You have got to be fucking kidding.
The only redeeming part of Bloodrayne was...... by Doc_Strange	Nov 8th, 2006 06:20:26 PM
Michael Madsen's KING Mullet. That thing was worth the price of admission alone. Probably made rednecks the world over cry.
Bloodrayne owns Near Dark by darthbinks1220	Nov 8th, 2006 09:19:14 PM
Uwe Boll crafted a classic vampire film.
The only way I'll watch BR2... by onemanarmy	Nov 8th, 2006 11:55:43 PM
...is if Boll can top the jailcell spiderman style sex scene. And of course more tit shots. And I'm serious.
the way I look at this thread is by emeraldboy	Nov 9th, 2006 05:30:36 AM
it reminds of those arguments in the UK over traditional art and contempary modern art. There are those whoe like the works of old masters the gainboroughs, the contables and the rembrandts. these people absolutely detest and despise the modern art of the likes of Emin and Hirst. Thats Tracy Emin and Damien Hirst, both of whom went to art school but took a different route in the art work. You either like these people or you dont. Same applies to this Dr boll or ratner or bay. you either like the movies that they make or you dont. it seems to me as black and white as that. Movies are there to entertain us the people that go and see the films.
Boll is way better than sex... by StovetopStuffin'	Nov 9th, 2006 09:22:19 AM
with a BEAR TRAP, that is.
Bloodrayne 2 is a direct-to-video project. by FatPaul	Nov 9th, 2006 10:13:40 AM
That means that it's not likely to lose money. Hell, the recent Seagal movies cost about $30 million a piece, and they still make a profit. A $3.4 million dollar DTV sequel to a recent theatrical release? Easy money. The original doesn't even have to be popular. They made a sequel to Undisputed. They'll make a DTV sequel to anything.
Uwe saw The Producers at his husband's house... by choptop	Nov 9th, 2006 12:22:44 PM
...and said "Murgle shoffindorn." Then he took the cock out of his mouth and said "What a brilliant idea!"
Georges, if you're still out there by half vader	Nov 9th, 2006 11:27:18 PM
Come on, we both know you're just working Leedrick's nerves 'til he cracks. That's why you keep spelling 'George' incorrectly. You can't fool me with your cunning plan!

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Hey, Let’s Make A Sequel To An Artistic & Commercial Failure!! A Boll-O-Riffic BLOODRAYNE 2 Is Coming!!

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