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THE BLACK DAHLIA turned on Harry!!!

Fuckin funny review by 7Cal	Sep 16th, 2006 02:33:10 AM
Gotta say Harry, I think that was your actual funniest review yet. Not ham-fisted shocking like the Blade II review, just fricking funny. Good job.
Also forgot to add by 7Cal	Sep 16th, 2006 02:35:22 AM
"Laura" is my favorite noir film of all time. Damn that film is awesome. Gotta love the cop who also can't leave his 1940's-era Gameboy alone even when questioning murder suspects. If they ever remade it (and yes it would suck, but I don't get all huffy about it), they'd have to have the cop playing a PSP baseball game all the time as homage.
Well, that opening title / paragraph was creepy as hell by TallBoy66	Sep 16th, 2006 02:45:54 AM
G'nite folks, no reason to read the rest of that!
wow Harry by axemurder	Sep 16th, 2006 03:06:05 AM
you fucking dissed something!!!! way ta go big guy!! Just give me the Body Double special edition! no need to see this!
Femme Fatale by Bungion Boy	Sep 16th, 2006 04:28:20 AM
Come now. It had some moments. But that is the very definition of a watchable mess. What is it doing in Harry's "love" category?
The film sucks in part due to Hartnett being cast by Doc_Strange	Sep 16th, 2006 04:30:22 AM
Seriously, why does this guy keep getting movie roles? He is a terrible actor, plus he manages to have that bowl hairdo in every movie he's in. Get a fuckin' hair stylist. I can't watch any movie that he's in because I know he'll screw it up just by being there. It sucks because the female cast is top drawer.
Miscast and poorly written by vhsiv	Sep 16th, 2006 04:39:25 AM
It needs to be remadem because DePalma and screeenwriter Josh Friedman screwed the pooch on this one – not only with the script but the casting. &nbs p; &nbs p; &nbs p; Honestly, it needs to be reshot with Russell Crowe, Guy Pearce and a better script.
Harry, you write like a 15 year old hillbilly... by Bob Cryptonight	Sep 16th, 2006 04:48:39 AM
You use halfwit grammar, and you constantly refer to sex because you think it makes you "cool" to Cletus, Jed and all the other victims of inbreeding down at the water hole. I mean, come on...this review is just silly. I understand your point but, Christ, getting there is torture!
SPOILER WARNING, ASSCLOWN! by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 16th, 2006 04:53:04 AM
Now I know how Psycho ends.
I agree with Harry. by I am a machineee	Sep 16th, 2006 04:53:22 AM
This movie could've been a hell of alot better, it had the ingredients. It's not that it was TOO confusing, it just started to have no reason at all. I got to the point where I didn't even care to listen to names and story afterawhile. LAME. Hollywoodland > Black Dahlia
P.S. Stop the presses! by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 16th, 2006 04:55:41 AM
Get me a new run of one-sheets with "A clumsy shoddy clusterfuck! - Ain't It Cool News.com" across the top.
In the end... by just_hamish	Sep 16th, 2006 05:18:43 AM
...it was just a clumsy shoddy clusterfuck. Haha brilliant description. Good to see some sense of reason in Harry's geeking out, not everything is perfect.
Mia Kirshner is the Sex by DOGSOUP	Sep 16th, 2006 06:20:22 AM
Thas all.
I stopped reading by deanamatronix	Sep 16th, 2006 06:32:00 AM
after the first couple of sentences. What a fucking retarded way to start a review. Neither clever nor funny. Idiot.
Wait for it... Wait for it... by MonkeyBytes	Sep 16th, 2006 06:44:12 AM
There it is! Pointless and over-the-top scatalogical simile, ahoy! Harry, you never fail to disappoint. I thought you were going to let it be with giving us visions of your twitching penis, but, alas, the poop must be mentioned in a true Harry review. Bravo.
Harry by NudeandAroused	Sep 16th, 2006 06:59:38 AM
Writes very well. One of things that makes De Palma movies all the more appealing is his way of enhancing the beauty of women. His (De Palma's) emphasis on their eyes and lips does indeed "speak to the penis." De Palma cleary had women of the 1940s in mind when the actresses were "made up." The movie is indeed a waste, but the way they play up the women is not. Harry writes with wisdom.
Harry, put down that fork... by Bubba Gillman	Sep 16th, 2006 07:32:10 AM
...and write a coherent review.
This movie is TERRIBLE! by Darth Sticky	Sep 16th, 2006 07:38:34 AM
I am a HUGE Ellroy fan! I met him at a book signing about a year ago and I asked him how the progress was going with DePalma's take on "Dahlia." I think Hartnett was just cast as Bucky and I don't think Mr. Ellroy was too pleased about it. I've been excited about this movie ever since I heard David Fincher was going to do it after "Fight Club." Oh HOW I wish Fincher did this instead of DePalma. DePalma sucks. He hasn't released a good movie in FOREVER! He needs to hang it up. DePalma and his actors TOTALLY FUCKED UP "DAHLIA!" Dahlia is by far one of Ellroy's best novels EVER - and they fucked it up. The acting is cardboard, stale and pure crapulence. The editing is SHIT! DePalma just can't put a decent movie together to save his ASS! (Funny thing: When I bought my tickets, I asked to see "Dahlia" and they accidentally printed out tix for "Little Miss Sunshine." I should have taken that as a sign and gone to see that, I think.)
Well, it's unanimous then... by DanielKurland	Sep 16th, 2006 08:34:39 AM
EVERYONE can agree that the weakness of the final half hour takes focus away from the great rest of the film. Did ANYONE enjoy the ending?
Harry didn't love a movie!!!??? by Jonesey1111	Sep 16th, 2006 10:05:13 AM
Wow, it's been a while since we have seen a negative review from Harry! Good on ya, big man.
These opening sentences reminded me of Owen's EW review by KennyKilo	Sep 16th, 2006 10:15:27 AM
When "Snake Eye's" was released Glieberman called DePalma "not the master of suspense, but the masterbator of suspense." When Herry writes a line like "Brian De Palma makes movies that speak to my penis" it all makes sense now.
Not everything can be a Texas Chainsaw Massacre rehash. by Nate Champion	Sep 16th, 2006 10:59:06 AM
Harry's "girlfriend" must be on the rag because it sounds like he spent the movie thinking about jerking off instead of what was on the screen. Happens to the best of us.
i have the retard tingles by occula	Sep 16th, 2006 12:15:06 PM
must harry mention his dick or his girlfriend in every review he writes? expand your horizons...
This review is terrible. by Wololo	Sep 16th, 2006 02:55:26 PM
I'm even ashamed of myself for having read it.
Sometimes the Talkback works... by ScarranHalfBreed	Sep 16th, 2006 03:25:20 PM
...and sometimes it doesn't AT ALL. Is it just me? Anyway... the idea of Harry's ginger, balloon-like penis getting concrete makes me want to bash one out right now. And what exactly IS a clusterfuck? And this movie looks almost as bad as the computer game with the same title starring "Hollywood legend" Dennis Hopper.
I saw it by Roy Neary	Sep 16th, 2006 04:18:56 PM
last night with my girlfriend and some friends, none of whom care who directed what or who wrote who and it was pretty much agreed that although there were way too many charecters, it was actually pretty good......until the last 20 minutes, Then it was WTF?! THATS IT?. To me, there were scenes that were classic Depalma, beautifully rendered and executed. Halfway through I thought what the hell is wrong with the reviewers, This is good. This doesn't suck and then all of a sudden it just...started...to... suck. Too bad.
It's a trainwreck by John Dalmas	Sep 16th, 2006 04:36:11 PM
An unmitigated disaster. Character and motivation are tossed out the window. Incomprehensible nonsense that makes a garbled mess of Ellroy's best, most personal novel. People laughed throughout the screening I just attended. I'm so fucking pissed they fucked this up so bad. The script is the worst adaptation of a book I've ever seen.
It's not just the last half hour either... by John Dalmas	Sep 16th, 2006 04:43:21 PM
... the whole thing is fucked throughout. People saying that the last thirty minutes diminished it must not have been watching the previous hour and a half of this garbled shit-stain of a film.
What does this mean? by Mgmax	Sep 16th, 2006 04:58:32 PM
"With the second most badass Mary Philbin film ever." After Phantom of the Opera? Or The Man Who Laughs? What do these have to do with The Black Dahlia?
One day Harry will write a review free of spoilers... by FilmCritic3000	Sep 16th, 2006 05:45:36 PM
And on that day it'll rain money from the sky. Until then I sincerely hope someone will teach him that movie reviews don't need to contain spoilers.
new sonic warriors episode by doctoremittbrown	Sep 16th, 2006 05:49:04 PM
the fifth episode of Sonic Warriors "Judger Be Judged" is ready to rock your face nuggets...WATCH IT!!! myspace video: http://vids.myspace.com/index. cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual &videoid=1174962415 youtube: Part 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =h0EJleR6Oo4 Part 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v =cHJoESRpuvw
what the fuck by Holodigm	Sep 17th, 2006 12:23:59 AM
am i the only person on the planet who liked snake eyes? i thought that movie was terrific, and it's the only de palma film sans pacino that i own. then again, i haven't seen sisters, body double, or dressed to kill either...
saw it earlier tonight by movieman742	Sep 17th, 2006 12:49:45 AM
I was really looking forward to this one. I have to give credit to Josh Harnet. With acting that stiff I don't know how he gets work. The only actor/actress that was good was Aaron Eckhart. I wanted to like it so much. It flirted with awesome camera shots and a first 40-60 minutes that had so much potential. The one thing I really didn't like in the film was Hartnet. Now I didn't read the book but for those who did, who would you have had as Bucky? I though Eckhart was pretty good as Lee though.
Someone actually LIKED FEMME FATALE? by Frgl_Rockatansky	Sep 17th, 2006 05:13:10 AM
Harry, gotta say brother, my respect for you has dropped a few hundred points. I was first surprised by your declaration that you love Brian De Palma. First off, that was shocking. I can't see how someone who has seen as many films as you have can have any love whatsoever for someone who basically remakes the same film over and over again. From BLOW OUT to BODY DOUBLE (one of the worst pieces of dogshit ever, thanks largely to the tremendously untalented Craig Wasson and Melanie Griffith) to FEMME FATALE and the just plain embarrassing DRESSED TO KILL. CARLITO'S WAY? Shite. RAISING CAIN? MAJOR shite. I honestly don't know what is worse... the fact that you love most of these films or the fact that I have SEEN most of them? I guess I keep hoping for another UNTOUCHABLES. Now, SCARFACE... a film totally watchable and brilliant if only to be seen as a comedy. As a action/drama, it's more shite. But if you view it as a comedy, it totally works. MISSION IMPOSSIBLE... watchable. I like it. At least he tried to DO something with it. CARRIE is embarrassing most of the time, but it does have one of the single greatest jump-scare moments in film history. THE UNTOUCHABLES is the only real FILM that De Palma ever made. Jam-packed with great performaces and tremendous set pieces and the single greatest demise of any villain in movie history... "DID HE SOUND ANYTHING LIKE THAT?!?!" That's just fucking brilliant. And of course, there's the David Fucking Mamet script which just melts in your mind and isn't totally fucked by the actors. Because if you get a script by Mamet where the actors don't understand his rhythms, you might as well forget it. Anyway... I guess I'm just disappointed in ya, Harry. No one who claims to be such a great lover of film should love De Palma so much.
Oh, and one other thing... by Frgl_Rockatansky	Sep 17th, 2006 05:17:57 AM
James Ellroy blows. Reading L.A. CONFIDENTIAL and seeing the film... the film trims away the bloated crap that Ellroy apparently thinks is cool and actually makes a better film than a book. How often does THAT happen? Although, I always felt that with De Palma at the helm of this film, the film would be on par with his writing style. According to every review I've read, apparently I'm right.
No, it really doesn't. by auraboy	Sep 17th, 2006 08:47:09 AM
Wait Harry should be nice to this piece of shit? Something this disappointing deserves more attentive words? Fuck it.
..... by The Ender	Sep 17th, 2006 01:17:36 PM
...tompbeast summed my sentiments up nicely
Harry + DePalma + Viagra... by Colonel Kane	Sep 17th, 2006 06:08:22 PM
would, at best, achieve semi-flaccidity. At best. Harry, please don't force me to think about your penis ever again. I am dry heaving with visions of a shrunken albino-white mushroom cap, buried by a grueseome shock of bright orange bush hair resembling the "comedian" carrot top's coif. I mean it, Harry. Never again!!!!
I WOULD agree with Harry by The Funketeer	Sep 17th, 2006 08:07:25 PM
except that he never really says what he didn't like about it. Instead we get an overview of DePalma's career and Hitch's as well. Lazy review. Go read Mori's instead.
how 'bout a heads up on the TB delay by thebearovingian	Sep 17th, 2006 08:33:27 PM
We, the TBers, would really like to know.
Too Soon! by Bob of the Shire	Sep 17th, 2006 09:44:24 PM
Elizabeth Short is the sexiest tomboy beanpole on the planet.
you mention McGowan and not Jemima Rooper? by lynxpro	Sep 17th, 2006 10:39:02 PM
Your credibility is shot, Harry. Its not like McGowan commanded that dildo in the flick, or sucked on it with that cream on its head. That solely belongs to Jemima Rooper, baby. The hottest thing in the flick. And it certainly was not Hillary Swank. Remember these two words, Jemima Rooper, biotches.
It's like a Rated R Law and Order in the 30s by antonphd	Sep 17th, 2006 10:41:36 PM
I enjoyed it a lot. I don't go into detective movies expecting masterpiece dramatic film making. I go in wanting to enjoy being along for the ride with the characters as they solve some mystery. I think the movie was fun and when I say fun... I mean... it was fun. I do worry for Harry Potter in the summers now though.
DOGSOUP, no, Rooper was THE SEX... by lynxpro	Sep 17th, 2006 10:46:29 PM
I'd like to order another round of that too.
as for Snake Eyes... by lynxpro	Sep 17th, 2006 10:50:31 PM
It would have been a decent film had they not cut out the scene with Nicolas Cage in the water pipe that the finale of the film references but it had in fact been excised from the film. That and the totally obvious point that Gary Sinese was a villain from his intro into the film.
The Ending by antonphd	Sep 17th, 2006 10:52:18 PM
Honestly... the ending was pretty weak... but it was fun... because I really enjoyed Harry Pottor's aunt's perfomance. As for the very very ending... it's very much the kind of ending from the detective books back then. The more I think about the film, the more I like it. I may even go watch it again. The important thing to remember about this movie is... it's a trashy detective story.
Josh Harnett by antonphd	Sep 17th, 2006 11:00:02 PM
By the way, he nailed this role. If he plays his cards right he can be the next big leading man when he gets a little older. Personally, I hope he does another detective movie. I'd like to see him take on a hard boiled detective series. He does need to work being a bit more charismatic though. He needs some of Denzel Washington's sparkle in his eyes. If he has any spark, it would be good to see it. I remember wathing the 30 days/nights movie and it was pretty fun. He just needs to step out of the James Dean thing some and have some fun. Harrison Ford's serious/fun ratio would work well with him. I hope he figures it out, it would be nice to have a solid leading man from the US.
What were all these otherwise talented people thinking by JacksParasites	Sep 17th, 2006 11:18:32 PM
when they got involved in this film? They couldn't possibly have finished the script. I liked the film early on. I was a little bothered by the fact that some actors were playing it straight while other actors were trying to sound like old-school noir actors, but that wasn't a big deal. Then after god knows how long (since the film really felt like it was 3 hours long) it stopped making sense. I had no clue who was connected to who and for what reason. And when you have to replay soundbytes that came before, it means it wasn't clear the first time. And it's really bad if they don't clear anything up the second time either. And when characters started to randomly spout out what "really happened" for no reason at all, I was completely done with this garbage. It's a real shame because I was into it early on. And as Harry pointed out, the women in the film were damned easy on the eyes. What the hell were they thinking??
Easy on the eyes by Colonel Kane	Sep 17th, 2006 11:27:31 PM
Harry's semi-erect penis would have settled for nothing less.
THIS MOVIE SUCKED! WASTE OF 10 BUCKS! by Jon E Cin	Sep 18th, 2006 03:50:54 AM
Holy crap was this a stinker! At least 6 people walked out, this movie sucked ass! I was so pissed off...and I was hoping for it to get better, but it got worse! The movie has almost nothing to do with the black dahlia....she's more of a subplot to a trainwreck! BOTTOM LINE! DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE! You have been warned!
oh..out of the 6 people that walked out by Jon E Cin	Sep 18th, 2006 03:57:50 AM
only about 8 of us were left watching this shitfest! I am so mad.
chickychow, you're hired by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 18th, 2006 04:27:48 AM
That was some fine ghostwriting, sir. We just need you to add some product placement and 10,000 words about what you did on the way to the theater.
P.S. Whatever happened to Mr. Beaks? by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 18th, 2006 04:40:23 AM
He of the DePalma retrospective coverage? I'd sincerely love to hear his take on this, erm, film.
P.P.S. Nevermind by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 18th, 2006 04:44:29 AM
A quick googling found him at "another popular film website" interviewing, rather than fantasizing about being sodomized by, DePalma himself.
P.P.P.S. Really good interview by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 18th, 2006 05:00:54 AM
On that other popular film website. DePalma says, "It’s funny. When a critic defends me, they’ve got a lot on their plate." Too damned true, but only because your movies end up sucking most of the time. Apparently there's an Untouchables prequel in the works. "Memo to self: don't drop ball in final act."
The last thing I wanted... by sopranopants	Sep 18th, 2006 06:11:58 AM
was the idea in my head of harry getting hard. oh GOD the humanity dude!
What a Dick!!! by Pavster	Sep 18th, 2006 07:20:15 AM
What a stupid review, not big or clever. Has Harry even seen his dick for the last 10 years? Fuckin fat bastard!!!
Harry hated it by Lost Prophet	Sep 18th, 2006 08:22:55 AM
so therefore, judging by the fact that he has been systematically wrong for a long time, this film will be good.
I liked it by Buffalo500	Sep 18th, 2006 08:27:53 AM
I’m a big De Palma fan. I don’t think he was the best director to bring an Ellroy novel to the screen, and I still think we’re waiting on a great film based on an Ellroy book, but this film was definitely entertaining. The ending was a bit weak, it just sort of fizzled out. Apart from that I enjoyed it. De Palma even made Hillary Swank look sexy which is a miracle in itself!
I liked it by Buffalo500	Sep 18th, 2006 08:29:43 AM
I’m a big De Palma fan. I don’t think he was the best director to bring an Ellroy novel to the screen, and I still think we’re waiting on a great film based on an Ellroy book, but this film was definitely entertaining. The ending was a bit weak, it just sort of fizzled out. Apart from that I enjoyed it. De Palma even made Hillary Swank look sexy which is a miracle in itself!
CONGRATULATIONS HARRY!!!!! by Kapowski	Sep 18th, 2006 12:14:12 PM
What an excellent review! You know, I'm so impressed by this review, I think I'm going to go around and tell everyone who'll listen how Brian DePalma's films make my dick hard. Maybe then they'll take me seriously as a movie reviewer. Of course, not even Rotten Tomatoes would host my reviews as everyone in the industry will still consider me to be a fat overblown clown with raging red hair who's dating a child that'll eventually divorce me and take half of money and all my reviews from then on will be about how this film and that film remind me of the one person that I had sex with and the one time someone described to me what my penis actually looks like. Thank you, Harry. You're the best idol someone could ever have.
Harry, Harry, Harry... by YackBacker	Sep 18th, 2006 12:17:11 PM
I love this review. Vintage Knowles, right down to the opening about your penis. And honest too!
A major disappointment by Dickie Greenleaf	Sep 18th, 2006 12:48:48 PM
I've heard a lot of people lament in the build-up to the release of this film how hard Brian De Palma finds it to get films made these days and how his peers from the 70s have time and again been given far greater creative freedom. Well, there's a very simple reason why Brian De Palma doesn't enjoy the freedom that Scorsese and Spielberg have - he's not as good. Not nearly as good. And its basically as simple as that. Scorsese and Spielberg are as cineliterate as anybody who's ever stepped behind a camera, but what ultimately marks them out as living legends who are afforded the latitude to essentially write their own ticket (and that's an opinion that Scorsese would probably contest) is that they understand that character and story come first. If you can't connect with an audience, you're always gonna come up short. I'm as big a supporter of 70s auteur-driven cinema as you're likely to find, but I can't blame the Hollywood brass for keeping De Palma on a tight leash - if he was given carte blanche, he'd end up wasting an awful lot of money. Don't get me wrong, I WANT to like De Palma. Like a lot of people, he's made films that I genuinely really like (though I'd be hard pushed to declare outright love for any of them the way I would for a TAXI DRIVER or a JAWS), but after almost 40 years of making movies, De Palma still strikes me as someone who's still searching for the way in which all the pieces fit together. Even his 'celebrated' aesthetic style seems overrated to me - I mean, he certainly knows how to move a camera, but I would argue that the marrying of one image to another is where the problems start. Editing is perhaps the most important element in terms on controlling the tone of a film, and for me, De Palma movies lurch wildly and erratically all over the place before invariably giving up long before reaching the finishing line - THE BLACK DAHLIA is a prime example. Right from the start, something just feels wrong. The opening scenes feel rushed and the transitions are too quick. Relationships are established in a kind of movie shorthand - a narrative convenience to get things going to the real story. Which is fine if it works...but it doesn't. The reason why THE BLACK DAHLIA is regarded as arguably Ellroy's most personal book is because the author transfers his demons between the two main characters. One one level, the case is about obsession and guilt. And on another, about Hollywood and the dark avenues the bright and beautiful can be so totally swallowed up by. Elizabeth Short's murder remains notorious not only because of the unspeakable savagery to which she was subjected, but what it said about the place in which it occurred - that unshakeable feeling that this kind of depravity could only have happened where it did, amidst the neon and the glitz. Ellroy understands this. Its where a great deal of the book's power comes from. A number of other filmmakers have understood that foreboding sense of what lurks beneath the shadows of the Hollywood sign in the telling of other great L.A. stories from Billy Wilder's SUNSET BLVD. to David Lynch's MULHOLLAND DRIVE. Curtis Hanson understood this with Ellroy's own L.A. CONFIDENTIAL, the standard to which any subsequent adaptation of the author's work shall be compared. L.A. CONFIDENTIAL is a masterpiece. Of story, character, atmosphere and style. A film truly deserving of its modern classic status. The film demonstrates how to be evocative without being nostalgic. How to pay homage to its cinematic influences without devolving into pastiche. L.A. CONFIDENTIAL was a film in which the director had complete control over the telling of his story and total confidence in his material. I'm really not sure what De Palma thinks of this material because as you watch it, it really doesn't seem like much thought went into what's up on the screen at all besides the staging of its elborate crane shots. This is a film that descends into a pantomime. It really doesn't seem worthwhile to point out the deficiencies of performance because you really can't blame the actors. They all seem to think they're in a different film - Harnett is too earnest, Eckhart is too broad, Johansson too vacant and Swank...well, maybe De Palma told her it was a comedy after having the same conversation with Fiona Shaw, who clearly thinks this was some kind of slapstick nightmare. But like I said, you really can't blame the actors - they were completely stranded here by a director who never had a grip on his film. And whilst both Scorsese and Spielberg have misfired in the past, I don't believe either have ever had that criticism levelled at them with any justification. It honestly gives me no pleasure to write any of this - I'm genuinely gutted about this film. This is probably the biggest disappointment of the year so far. I'm a big fan of James Ellroy. I was a big fan of the book. I really thought De Palma could be well suited to the material. But this film is an absolute wreck, and its all De Palma's fault. He has completely and utterly failed to transfer the nuances and substance of the book to the film, taking only Ellroy's trademark crudity which, outside of the context provided by the feeling and conviction behind the words, seems juvenile and tasteless. This would have been an infinitely better film if David Fincher had remained on board. Fincher wanted to explore all of the nuts and bolts of the case and the psychological journey the characters endured in the investigation (though if reports are true, it seems as though he has essentially made the film he would've intended here with his upcoming ZODIAC). De Palma's film is being marketed as a psycholical thriller, but is too empty to get at the psychology behind the crime and too flippant to achieve any suspense. Ellroy's books make for great thrillers, because he makes his characters work hard. The narratives are driven by hard graft. The detectives have to slog though each detail for a break, which is why almost every protagonist is brought near to breakdown. It often comes close to the perverse, but its always fascinating and compelling. The main protagonist of THE BLACK DAHLIA is Bucky Bleichert, and in the first person narrative of the book, struggles against his limitations as a detective to see beyond the lies and corruption obstructing the investigation into the Dahlia's murder and her past. The Bucky Bleichert of De Palma's film stumbles ignorantly through the story, understanding little and coming away with only superficial wounds. In the book, his life is irrevocably changed. De Palma has made a film devoid of real feeling, and it's also worth pointing out that once upon a time, there was an actual person called Elizabeth Short and she died a truly horrific death. Perhaps the final criticism of this film should be its failure to recognize the horror she endured, the fear and suspicion it spread throughout the community, instead choosing to dismiss her ordeal amidst what becomes a very convoluted and ultimately very silly explanation of events as a theory behind her demise. I hope De Palma makes more films, I really do, because right now, he has a lot of ground to make up if he is to ever truly be remembered as a talent capable of greatness.
they're so SENSUAL!!! by Bob C. Cock	Sep 18th, 2006 02:09:40 PM
what the fuck?
I have only seen two depalma films by emeraldboy	Sep 18th, 2006 03:20:39 PM
Snake Eyes and Mission Impossible. I hate tom Cruise and so therefore I hated the bloated mission impossible and i dont care how many gazillions it made for Cruise. Snakes eyes was flashy fun, style over substances. I actually flicked in and out of the untouchables. look Depalma is a director I cant watch. tried wathcing carlitos way but seeing as i cant stand Sean Penn and cant bear it when AL Pacinos Overacts, the movie was a complete turnoff. Everyone hypes Depalma because of the one or great movies he made in the 70's and 80's Carrie and Blowback. Depalma Said that he didnt like star wars when he first saw the rough thrown together screening that Lucas showed to his friends and they all laughed. How much money has Lucas made out of star wars. 100s of billions. Depalma and Scorsese blamed Speilberg and Lucas for Destroying there dreams of making arthouse films. Scorsese of course has seen Star wars, when he cleaned up and he though it was great. Scorcese has said that he would like to make a sci-fi film. Scorcese and depalma dont have great careers anymore. The internet is haping the future of all things.
emeraldboy by The Funketeer	Sep 18th, 2006 10:33:38 PM
The Internet isn't shaping jack squat and only a 13 year old or a 40 year old marketing exec would think otherwise. You want to see some DePalma stop flipping through the Untouchables and watch the whole damn thing from begining to end. Then try Blow Out which is probably his best picture. Finally, go back and watch Carrie a couple times. Then come back here and pretend you know what you're talking about.
Well, sure, but does your penis talk BACK to the movie? by GreatWhiteNoise	Sep 19th, 2006 02:26:34 AM
On second thought, don't answer that...
Have you got some new ones then Brokeback by Lost Prophet	Sep 19th, 2006 03:34:11 AM
preferably that don't relate to politics. Flames on optimus gags are funnier when they relate to fat chicks etc.
Dickie Greenleaf by antonphd	Sep 19th, 2006 05:52:02 AM
Damn, i liked the movie until i read what you said. you are probably right. i admit though that i wasn't looking for a great film. i was just expecting a half decent detective film. after watching Piorot it's hard to think of other detective stories as just being 'ok'.
Dickie Greenleaf 2: Electric Boogaloo by BannedOnTheRun	Sep 19th, 2006 07:38:09 AM
That's why I like this site: even when Harry slaps up some bullshit "review" about his dick or what route he took to the theater, someone will step up and post the real review in the talkbacks. P.S. I love "Mission to Mars" -- well, the scene where Tim Robbins dies horribly, anyway. The rest is crap.
Mia Kirschner makes my penis hard too by JackDonkey	Sep 19th, 2006 12:41:42 PM
and it's wierd you can't just look at pictures of her, you have to watch her on screen talking and walking and all that kind of stuff, the voice goes with the movements and all that.
Don't tease me, please me by Rupee88	Sep 19th, 2006 07:34:12 PM
If I want to get turned on by a film, I'll usually just watch a good porno...I usually just find it distracting with regular films have too much erotica in them. Although it is certainly great to see mainstream Hollywood actresses in various stages of undress.
How did the same guy make Scarface AND Mission to Mars by Rupee88	Sep 19th, 2006 07:35:57 PM
I'll never understand that. I hope Mission to Mars was just a paycheck for him and he put zero effort into it..if not, he is over for sure.
Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid was a more convincing Noir... by pokadoo	Sep 20th, 2006 03:42:12 PM
...than this clunker! Hartnet & Johanson may look very beautiful in the parts, but they're both totaly wooden. Hartnet especially. The only good thing you can really say about him is "Well, at least it isn't Ashton Kutcher". Swank was the only real standout performance. And Mcgowans tiny role was good too. I love Eckhart, but he was criminaly underused. It was a real disapointment, other than the nice scenery. Although the tracking/crane shot served no real purpose other than to take you out of the movie and say "Hey Kids, this is a Brian DePalma film!!!". Not good.
It's amazing, just COMPLICATED by CdM	Sep 21st, 2006 10:30:14 AM
It's too bad that people are getting turned off by this movie because it is so very complicated. I just saw it for a second time and it was much clearer, and eve more obviously well constructed. And most of the story and emotional sense has to be reconstructed in retrospect, which is good for the movie as art, but bad for it as something one walks out of cheering. Anyway, when you're ready, I think repeat viewings will go down smoother. ---- Check out my site: Cinema de Merde http://tinyurl.com/znj5f
Is this film... by Melian	Sep 21st, 2006 04:49:55 PM
... as nauseatingly misogynist as this review makes it sound?
the movie was good, not great, but pretty good by deadlegend	Sep 21st, 2006 08:28:10 PM
I enjoy complex movies. They're fun to watch. It's fun to try to piece together a bunch of plot twists and mysteries after I walk out of the theater, even after they explain it all. That's part of the magic. It's just that feeling that the filmmakers know something that I don't and I have to figure out what it is. That's fun. I also love film noir. If someone doesn't think the Black Dahlia is film noir, then that person is clueless. This was a good film, not great, but good. When are people going to step back out of the fucking box and realize that not every movie has to be the same as its predecessor - not every noir film has to resemble every other one, not every superhero film has to be just like Spiderman or Batman Begins, not every M. Night film has to be like Sixth Sense and Signs, and not every martial arts film has to have a perfect, consistent storyline. I'm not disappointed with every movie that comes out because I want to see something different. I don't want to see the same that I did last time. Most people cling to an idea and subliminally expect every other action, superhero, mystery, martial arts, or historical film to be exactly alike. BROADEN YOUR MINDS, PEOPLE. DAMN.
THE BLACK DAHLIA by hkong42	Sep 22nd, 2006 08:23:05 PM
I love this wonderful site, but THE BLACK DAHLIA is two hours of my life I'll never get back. It stunk.
The Talented Mr. Greenleaf. by WONKABAR	Sep 24th, 2006 12:58:52 AM
Nice shootn' Tex. Too bad the movie itself derserves only one word....mess.
Harry's right, De Palma makes you horny by hippolyta	Sep 24th, 2006 04:03:22 PM
Watching Body Double on the USA network was the first time I ever masturbated. I think I was 10.
Ah, Mr DePalma's work... by StephenG	Oct 16th, 2006 09:21:37 AM
...ALWAYS resembles someone else's film! The guy's an homage engine. I still haven't stopped laughing at his Potemkin "homage" in "The Untouchables", that film that should have had anyone but Costner in it.
Worst adaptation EVER! by Spandau Belly	Dec 27th, 2006 01:50:42 PM
That's all I gotta say.
.............crickets chirping. by jarjarsdeathrattle	Feb 4th, 2007 12:42:05 AM
Umm.....why is this still up? and yes, I realize the irony of posting to bitch about old news suffering from a lack of posts.
This film wasn't altogether bad... by The_Jack_Sack	Feb 5th, 2007 12:16:22 PM
There's nothing wrong that could not have been fixed in the editing room...

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