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AICN COMICS REVIEWS ULTIMATES 2! DETECTIVE COMICS! THE BLADE TRINITY MOVIE!

I like comic books with pictures. by Stallion_Cornell	Dec 8th, 2004 06:17:59 PM
'Nuff said? Perhaps.
I like comic books with boobs by Super Person	Dec 8th, 2004 06:43:09 PM
And lots of 'em, size HHH or bigger.
Schleppy is BACK! by speed	Dec 8th, 2004 06:46:45 PM
Everyone loves monkeys. Monkeys make me laugh.
Purple Man explained easily enough by jinX	Dec 8th, 2004 07:05:42 PM
The events in New Thunderbolts take place after the prison break in New Avengers.
purple man by AshFett	Dec 8th, 2004 07:19:43 PM
yeah, this bitching about the purple man is silly. Why not complain about the fact that he was in Thunderbolts with no eplanation of how he got out of jail? Oh wait a second... New Avengers gave an explanation! So it was fixing a plot hole, not creating a new one.
What would I give for christmas? by sideshowbob	Dec 8th, 2004 07:22:51 PM
Probably BLANKETS, for comics-readers and non-comics-readers alike, though if the WE3 trade was out now I know some people who'd go for that. I plan on getting my wife Adrianne Tomine's SUMMER BLONDE (shhhhhh). For Ambush Bug, though, I'm thinking the complete set of Bendis/Maleev Daredevil trades and a bottle of ridalin so he can finally enjoy it. I had to say it, (I also have to admit, though, he was right about NEW AVENGERS. And did anyone else find it funny that Foggy was a TOTALLY different character in New Avengers than in Daredevil, despite having the SAME writer? Sheesh...is it any surprise they can't keep up continuity with different writers?)
DETECTIVE #801 was like the realization of my fears when Darren by Dave_F	Dec 8th, 2004 07:33:56 PM
Geez, just when I thought Gotham couldn't get more morose in the wake of WAR GAMES, Lapham comes along to prove me wrong. Sleazy, I saw the craftsmanship you were talking about, but Jesus! Lapham's arc looks to be about as spirited as Azzarello's corpse of a SUPERMAN outing. And I don't care what frickin' interpretation of the Bat-universe we're seeing - Bruce Wayne would never...EVER...let some 14-year-old party girl debutante cross his path without trying to help her in some way. But no, Lapham makes out that Bruce shut her down with some harsh words, told her to grow up or some such, and now we're in for 12 issues of him angsting over the inability of his writer to portray him as a hero. From the omniscient narrator when Batman finds the girl dead: "She broke. And he broke her." Ugh. If that's to be the emotional underpinning of this year-long mystery, consider me out.
So was Blade the first fictional dhampir? by FrankDrebin	Dec 8th, 2004 08:06:01 PM
I know the term is from old gypsy folklore (paging Maria Ouspenskaya!), but I can't think of any books or movies to use one before Marv's Blade comic.
carl barks uncle scrooge adventures by speed	Dec 8th, 2004 11:03:47 PM
is a good idea. i have em all, but i really want to discover them again, so when i go home this year i'm going to bring some of em back with me. great chrimbo present to myself.
Rageahol by Ribbons	Dec 9th, 2004 12:40:03 AM
I think that rage being treated as a cancer instead of as something cathartic (although I'd be willing to bet some people still get off on the experience of Hulk's murderous romps through NYC) is probably a reaction to stuff like Columbine. While I'd argue that there's more going on there than frustration there are an awful lot of parallels, and I think not only are people trying to be more consciously responsible but are also afraid to recognize those feelings of rage within themselves. And so, The Hulk is unequivocally wrong. I always thought the Hulk was meant to be a cautionary tale, but there's probably room for more flexible interpretations of rage.
WAR OF THE WORLDS Trailer Tomorrow! by Boxclocke	Dec 9th, 2004 01:14:52 AM
Friday morning, the War of the Worlds teaser premieres exclusively online on the official website! http://www.waroftheworlds.com/
GreatOne, there are huge problems with the script's logic. by SleazyG.	Dec 9th, 2004 01:20:25 AM
Blade kills a human. Whistler says "you're getting sloppy. Killing humans is way too messy. Leaves a trail. You need to be more careful." Five minutes later Whistler shotguns around ten humans--cops, no less--before blowing up the remaining ones who are still in the warehouse. Ten minutes later we're in an interrogation where Blade admits to killing (and I could be off by a dozen or so) roughly 1,184 humans--and justifies it by saying "they were familiars". Okay, fine--but then why did they ever make a big deal about him killing the one lousy familiar at the beginning of the movie? Clearly, Blade wouldn't give a fuck and Whistler's had nearly 1200 of their deaths to get used to it. Beyond that, how logical is it that a highly trained killer would pump Max Graham through her iPod IN BATTLE? How, exactly, would she hear anyone approaching her from behind, above or the sides? Beyond that, how is this "virus" supposed to spread through the vampires when they die to quickly to travel as carriers and spread it to other vampires? Beyond that, why would the Numero Uno Vamp kill the useless lackeys like Patton Oswalt while keeping a threat like Hannibal King alive long enough for him to come back and kick a bunch of vamp ass? That's not counting the way the action scenes were shot, making them choppy and confusing instead of kickass. Sorry, it's a deeply flawed film. I shoulda saved it for the Brew'n'View, just like I did with the first two. As for Snipes, truth is Reynolds stole the movie because he's charismatic. You can't even tell when Snipes is glaring at anybody or read any of his emotions because he's always wearing shades. There's no depth to his character. Snipes standing around not talking to anybody and acting like a dick isn't acting--it's Snipes. He was brutally dull through the whole movie. Bad script, mediocre directing, weak lead performance. It was passable, I guess--it wasn't as painful as THE PUNISHER--but it wasn't anything special.
Buzz Maverick said he liked "Ultimates" and "Marvel Knights Spid by rev_skarekroe	Dec 9th, 2004 10:16:32 AM
Careful Buzz, or your not going to get invited to the @$$hole Christmas party.
Newsflash: "Blade the Vampire slayer" is a no-go as of 8 years a by Fantomex	Dec 9th, 2004 11:06:28 AM
I couldn't believe you were reviewing a Buffy the Vampire Slayer TPB (or even that such a thing existed). Turns out you were talking about that lesser known "vampire slayer". Yeah, someone cc marvel on that. More later...
Fallen Angel by rengaw	Dec 9th, 2004 11:14:07 AM
Why no review for Peter David's "Fallen Angel" #18? This is a great series that has earned continuation, although with a two month "vacation" before #19 comes out.
Marvel Zombie by psipher	Dec 9th, 2004 11:47:05 AM
I know exactly what you mean by being having a Marvel comfort zone. I read my first batch of comics back in 1976. My best friend had a hefty allowance and bought every title that came out each month from both Marvel and DC. Of course, back then, the cover price was a quarter and there were maybe 20 titles or so that comprised both companies offerings. He loaned me two stacks of books - one of Marvel and one of DC. I had heard of Superman and Batman and so I read those books first. At that point DC must have been going through a low point in its creativity and artistry because after a half dozen issues I could take no more. The art was crap and the stories were total shit. For some reason, the only storyline that sticks out all these years later had something to do with an alien kid who made Superman too stupid to put together a jigsaw puzzle. After growing bored with the DC stuff, I went to the massive stack of Marvel comics and the first thing I read was Fantastic Four #166 (I'm pretty sure that was the number). That was the issue in which the team went after The Hulk. The Invisible Girl placed a force bubble around his head and nearly suffocated him. This particular arc lead to the Thing losing his powers because prolonged exposure to the gamma radiation emitted by The Hulk cancelled out the cosmic rays that turned him into a monster. Great story and art by George Perez. I was hooked. Then I discovered the X-Men buried further in the stack and my first encounter with them was Neal Adams' art and the Living Pharaoh story that introduced Havok and Lorna Dane. Ever since I've been drawn more to the Marvel Universe. I know I've missed some great stories from DC, but other than Marv Wolfman and Gene Perez' version of Teen Titans, I've never really warmed to any DC offerings to bother collecting them. http://nextxcomics.com
We still rikee FALLEN ANGEL, Rengaw... by Dave_F	Dec 9th, 2004 11:48:24 AM
Well I do, anyway, and I think some other 'Holes continue to dig it as well. And I did in fact do a small write-up for #18, but we bumped the Cheap Shots section in favor of Christmas goodies this week, so it'll probably run next column.
Harry Volstag by Medieval Guy	Dec 9th, 2004 12:10:02 PM
Of course, it is entirely possible that Millar wrote Knowles into the book as a figment of Thor's imagination...
Crap Design by creepyCritic	Dec 9th, 2004 12:34:47 PM
Am I the only one who thinks Deadshot looks like something out of Marvel 1995? All he needs is a mullet sticking out of the back of his mask and he'd fit right in.
There is a monster at the end of this book by BillEmic	Dec 9th, 2004 02:16:30 PM
Hey, major major props for listing "There's a Monster at the end of this book", one of my favorite reads from childhood...scary as hell but hilarious to boot. Fairly inventive as well, at least for a children's novel. Fans of the HULK shouldn't miss it!
Ok, So I read New Avengers in the store, but didn't buy it by Homer Sexual	Dec 9th, 2004 06:42:33 PM
I give those guys plenty of money, and if it had not sucked I would have paid for it. I was going to completely ignore it, but I am a huge fan of Jessica Drew (bought every issue of her Spider-Woman) and Luke Cage (bought PM/IF for years and even got into the Cage mini drawn by Richard Corben). However, as I quickly perused the book, nothing at all seemed to happen. Thus, it was easy for me to maintain my "Wolverine is an X-Man, not an Avenger" boycott of New Avengers. As an aside, I have decided not to buy Powers anymore because A. Deena is very annoying. B. I loved the story that started with infamous "Monkeys" but now I'm bored. C. Really works better as a trade.
Comics as Christmas gifts by Ribbons	Dec 9th, 2004 09:41:43 PM
I got someone who happens to be a big Oshii fan "Domu," actually. To introduce someone to comics I'd probably give them "The Coffin" or "Herobear & The Kid" (a little schizo, I guess), and if you have a kid who's into comics, definitely get him some Miller stuff, TPBs of "The Goon" and "Bone." That's my suggestion.
BLADE and VAMPIRES by SleazyG.	Dec 9th, 2004 10:21:11 PM
When you mentioned the iPod thing, you said it "looked" stupid, so I figured you were addressing the visual aspect, and I agree with you--it looked ridiculous to see a slow-mo "ain't she badass?" shot of a girl putting her earbuds in. I was addressing the scripting behind the stupid image. As for the "airborne disease" thing--sure that's what they said. If you think about it, though, you ask yourself why they could only come up with enough for one little vial ("so don't blow it, Whistler's Daughter! Stay on target! Hope your womp rat experience comes in handy!") and then you wonder how that one small dose could possibly travel the entire planet, airborne, when there's been no explanation of how it reproduces, spreads and travels. There isn't a single "airborne" disease that can travel indefinite distances over thousands and thousands of miles, through chaotic weather patterns, without a carrier. How would it get from LA to Athens? Or Indonesia? Or Iceland? That's right, it wouldn't. It can't replicate itself, it can't travel in a host, and it can't travel environmentally. I'm no scientist--I've never even played a doctor on TV--but I've seen enough episode of "ER" to know this isn't just bad science, it's bad writing. Oh, and I'd like to point out how flawed the voice-over at the end is: a virus that is essentially the Final Solution for ridding our planet of vampires is unleashed. So, ummm, when they have Hannibal King say Blade is still out there somewhere doing what he's always done, what exactly are they talking about? Being a one-dimensional prick? Cuz there aren't gonna be any vamps left for him to kill...unless he goes on a humans-only familiar-butchering rampage, of course. Oh, and another flaw: why is it they could come up with a cure for Hannibal King to turn him human when he was a vamp, but with Blade he keeps needing his inhaler to curb his cravings? Why not just turn him human like King? I mean, that's a HUGE hole in the plot. On to VAMPIRES--I thought it was okay, but not great. I know it was based on a book I never read which may have predated the movie DEMON KNIGHT, but when I saw VAMPIRES it felt like they were ripping off the whole crucifixion riff from there (and yeah, I know it's used a lot, but still...). The leads were okay, but not great. It's something that's okay to watch for free on cable, but I'm glad I didn't shell out at the theaters for it. Daniel Baldwin's not that great, James Woods is spotty depending on the material, and Thomas Ian Griffith should've stuck to B-grade chop-sockey. Still much better than the Jon Bon Jovi-starring sequel, though.
I loved The Monster at the End of this Book as a kid. by Big Bad Clone	Dec 10th, 2004 09:57:11 AM
and I loved it more when I introduced it to my kids. I'll ripe up my voice reading it in a Grover voice over and over again. It's great.---- Comics as presents. Well I want to get The Walking Dead TPB for my brother but I'm having trouble finding it. I might get him some Y the Last Man trades. I found a Marvel Age trade of that romantic Mary Jane comic for my daughter. I'll get my son a Marvel age trade of a spidey comic as a stocking stuffer. I want someone to get me some subscriptions for X-Mas.
the Dracula/Blade switch by SleazyG.	Dec 10th, 2004 12:41:42 PM
Actually, that part made sense to me. Dracula says he respects Blade as a warrior, and that he'll give him one final gift. That gift is to change his appearance to look like Blade so that Blade can escape before the law shows up. It's simple and straightforward enough, and for those who still buy into a "warrior's code" type thing it would be totally in character. And yeah, I've heard the book "Vampire$" is far better than the movie--just haven't gotten around to it yet.
Don't let me get you down Ambush Bug... by tylernol	Dec 10th, 2004 04:51:02 PM
...becasue your New Avengers review is brilliant! I never saw that coming but after re-reading your review, knowing how it would end, I see how clever the idea was. And I agree totally, it sucks to have to go through an entire comic hoping something cool is going to happen, only to have it end with nothing but that sick feeling in your gut that there are so many other things that 5 bucks (in Canada) could have bought. Damn, 10 bucks a month will get you some mighty fine internet porn nowadays from those enterprising individuals who understand that just as much money can be made on volume as on higher prices. Unlimited access to beautiful streaming videos for the cost of just 2 Bendis gabfests per month?? Hours of fun, entertainment, and dare I say, no strings satisfaction?? Is there even a contest here?? But I digress, great review Bugster!
seethroughthis by Jack Ryder	Dec 11th, 2004 05:18:38 PM
"...I'm surprised this hack even bothered to read "New Avengers" as his dislike of Bendis pretty much dictated how the review was going to end. If Bendis' build-up is like your dates in high school, don't blame the guy because you kept blowing your wad on some chick's thigh because you're too impatient to wait and let something build." How could you be surprised when he explained it all? I paid to be entertained. Not for the promise of being entertained in a month or two, or six. I didn't see Matrix 3 hoping, like some people, that it would make Matrix 2 a better movie. I don't need to keep buying Avengers, I'm sorry "NEW" Avengers, in hopes that later issues will make this one better. If they want to write a graphic novel than write one. But would it be that much better to have a graphic novel where nothing happens? Marvel is selling a 2.99 product. They should make a whole product.

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AICN COMICS REVIEWS ULTIMATES 2! DETECTIVE COMICS! THE BLADE TRINITY MOVIE!

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