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Early Test Screening of the Theatrical Remake of THUNDERBIRDS is lame lame lame sounding!

So Fuckwit here has never watched the show on which the film was by taxman2001	May 23rd, 2004 12:26:31 PM
Sweet Baby Jesus! I mean, he had to rely on his girlfriend for authenticity and clearly doesn't like Frakes, so that hasn't pre-judged his opinion. Oh wait it has. And for Fuckwits info the five brothers are all named after 1960's American astronauts SCOTT Carpenter, VIRGIL Grissom, ALAN Shepard, GORDON Cooper and JOHN Glenn.
Apologies by taxman2001	May 23rd, 2004 12:40:15 PM
But I don't think he understands that the film would always be made for kids since they are who films are aimed at nowadays.
Uh, Frakes didn't direct Nemesis by ItAintRight	May 23rd, 2004 12:41:45 PM
That was Stuart Baird. Still stunk, though...
I can't respect any reviewer who uses the letter "u" for the wor by Rolling_Stone	May 23rd, 2004 12:45:16 PM
He probably writes hearts all over his school binder with his and his girlfriend's name spelt out in cutie-pie ways too. Also I agree with the talk-backer who correctly pointed out that this is and always was supposed to be a kids movie.
i'm not a fuckwit for not liking a film u haven't seen... by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 12:50:02 PM
First off, i'm not against Frakes he just wasn't right for the film. I woulda known they were based on 60's astronauts if the film made u care enough about the characters to register their names. I'm not that stupid. The girl i was with didn't care much for it either. Surely the film should be made for people other than the built-in fan base, to help new people get into it. None of the children even came out of the cinema smiling. And yes, the show may have been a kids show, but that'e no reason for the film to be so dumb. I'm only 17, off to take Film Studies at Uni in sept, but it was still childish. I'm not against kids films, as long as they have some heart to them. Frakes obv didn't care about the material that much, especially not enough to please the fans of the show who grew up with it. So think b4 u call someone a fuckwit. Is there anyone else? lol
also... by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 12:52:49 PM
it's a sad state of affairs nowadays that films have to be aimed at kids to make more money. The film will do well over here in the UK, but will bomb in the states. And i'm only writing in shorthand because i'm at work,and have to hurry things along! I forgot why i don't post on here that often.... no-one is open to opinion...
All I'm saying Brad is that you need to understand the source ma by taxman2001	May 23rd, 2004 12:55:45 PM
.. and apologies again for calling you a fw. It's just that you're not the target audience for this film. If I have to take my nephew to a kids movie then I go in understanding it's a kids movie not a Quentin Tarantino movie. Though you are totally cirrect about VAN HELSING. Absolitely shite.
nah it's cool by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 01:03:34 PM
lol, i understand where you're coming from. I normally like all films if they're done well though. This one just was bit like an empty balloon, actually a gd comaprison would have been a more expensive Power Rangers episode! Anyway, at least u agree Van Helsing was balls. I went to a Critic's Screening and i swear i haven't heard so many people laugh AT a film in my life. That Face in the clouds? Like something out of the tellytubbies lol.
Frakes directed INSURRECTION, not Nemesis... by TheSumOfGod	May 23rd, 2004 01:09:13 PM
But I guess it doesn't really matter since Insurrection was almost as bad as Nemesis. I never saw Clockstoppers and I never intend to. It seems Riker exhausted all of his creative talent as a potential director with First Contact, but since First Contact kicked impressive quantities of ass, I'm prepared to forgive him practically anything. And we all know that he would do a better job at directing the upcoming SUPERMAN movie than that fucktard McGee.
SHREK 2 by AlwaysThere	May 23rd, 2004 01:09:57 PM
God damn, that opening weekend.
One of the MANY MANY things that was crap with VAN HELSING was . by taxman2001	May 23rd, 2004 01:11:40 PM
... that bloody Flamenco guitar music. I mean, they cross the sea and all we hear is a Flamenco guitar. They ride across snow covered mountains and the music that accompanies this scene is of a Flamenco guitar. They fight, Flamenco guitar. They do this, Flamenco guitar. All that could be heard was the Flamenco guitar. They should have let the Flamenco guitar star as Van Helsing, I'm sure ut would have been a better actor than Jackman.
Uh...Jeff Tracey didn't pilot Thunderbird One by RobinP	May 23rd, 2004 01:39:12 PM
...Scott did.
good reviews by u.k. star	May 23rd, 2004 01:43:58 PM
sorry to disappoint all those who love to bash films they've never seen but the official reviews are for this are pretty good, and it's expected to do very well. yes they do tend to point out that the film differs from the show and expect that to hurt the core fan audience seeing the film more than once, but they all point out that Jonathan frakes has obviously been briefed to make a kids film on a low budget, that will make a few hundred mil worldwide, bearing in mind how popular thunderbirds is in Japan those in the know (check screen international) seem pretty certain he's succeeded. personally I would have loved a more grown up film but I
what do u wanna know? by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 01:45:02 PM

what do u wanna know? by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 01:49:27 PM
i can tell u that my dad, a video cameraman, has a friend, who receives tickets for media screenings of UIP film (United International Pictures) but she doesn't like films, therefore gives the tickets to me. We saw Hulk last July, Van helsing on May 4th and Thunderbirds today. Off to see the Shrek 2 on june 6th which comes out here in the UK on July 2nd. If i wanted to plant a review i woulda gone to the imdb first to get all the facts and then i would have put all the fucking names. This was from memory, not trying to con u. i read this site as much as the next person, and don't care much for fake reviews, why would i do one myself? Ure just pissed cos u didn't get to see the film early. You can check around, there were 2 preview screenings in the West End today. one at 9 am and one at 12pm. Anyone here vouch for me? at the UCI Empire cinema Leicster Square! Don;t be so narrow minded just because u don't agree with the review. Anything else u want to know? ask me ureself.
director not writer by u.k. star	May 23rd, 2004 01:51:48 PM
I'll say it again he directed, and pretty well by most accounts,, he didn't write it! If you wanna blame someone for aiming the movie at kids and not "old" fans blame the studio for being seduced by spy kids. like i said before this movie will make at least $250m worldwide, it'll hit the spykids market staateside and thunderbirds is very big outside of the us
shrek 2 $125M $105m 3day! by u.k. star	May 23rd, 2004 01:54:30 PM
damn! "are we there yet"...."far far away!!!!"
Why is anyone surprised? by Mosquito March	May 23rd, 2004 01:55:43 PM
The only reason to watch THUNDERBIRDS was because it had the creepy puppets. All this movie has is Bill Paxton, who's even more wooden and dull than they are.
Thanx :) by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 01:57:54 PM
you knw what stoopid? Thanx, u've stood up for me, nice to know someone isn't an opinionated ass! You in the UK? cos if u do get a ticket for farenheit 9/11 i'll be sure to send one if i do. Kindness deserves it's reward! Can't wait for it myself. Yeah i know it's been a bummer they all suck, but they're free! lol. Hopefully Shrek 2 can't be that bad! Should be geting riddick ones as well!
indeed by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:04:46 PM
I'll keep u in mind. And Jeremy? stop whining...
LOL by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:12:04 PM
obv, the many darths a) don't have a sense of humor, and b) don't understand an act of kindness... maybe cos they think they're masters of the sith or something. It's just a movie guys...
what don;t i know? by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:28:36 PM
come on guys? tell me? let me guess u guys are married? And u sure Erik isn't short for Erika? and then again, u sure she isn't ure sister? Cos that wouldn't surprise me one bit....
Van Helsing by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:31:04 PM
Van helsing had a worldwide release of May 7th Erika... and as i said i saw the critics screening anyway, so it wouldn't have had anything to do with the release date. Bit like the Thunderbirds one today! check the dates on imdb! Thing Jeremy and Erika have been taking the Luke/Leia Dynamic one step too far...
excuse me? by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:32:04 PM
and i'm not a virgin, so there's nothing to cure there! lol
well... by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:42:06 PM
Van helsing ruined a gr8 premise. The wolf man had no purpose, Dracula came off as Frank N Furter and Frankenstein just babbled. It was a case of a director disappearing up his own ass. I loved the mummy films, cos at least they had characters which made u laugh. This was just CGI overload and some terrible acting. On another note, i'm not single, i'm a long term relationship with a GIRL in the UK. I wasn't being sexist, just adding fuel to Steve's fire. He may be stupid, and i may be arrogant, but everyone has their weaknesses. From the sounds of it, ure not open to other people's beliefs/political views/movie views. You prob think Episode 1 is the greatest film ever. That's ure view, i ain't gonna argue it. Each to their own. Sorry if i offended u, i thought u were addressing me as well. I'll leave u to steve then... And my name is short for Bradley, perfectly acceptable guy's name. Ask a Mr. Pitt. You don't see him getting criticised for it.
homophobic? by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:44:56 PM
i'm not homophobic. I work with many people of the gay persuasion, and they're gr8 guys. Men just happen to be they're type, like brunette women are mine. I was just stating that u 2 have a lot in common. And by u suggestion me and steve should get together aren't u being a bit of a hypocrit?
now that u mention it... by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:48:50 PM
it coulda done with a few more homeless people living in sewers? Maybe a few guys getting mugged? how about Van Helsing fighting the viruses in his office computer? much more realistic... What's ure fave film of the yr then? and ure worst while ure at it?
i thought i had a gd attitude... by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:49:53 PM
trying to tell u my views on this film... u don't have to listen to them, wait till u see a positive review u can side with. Free speech is anything but it seems
k then by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 02:57:49 PM
and i was trying to be sarcastic.. obviously i failed. lol. Hellboy is awesome, and in my opinion so are Kill Bill 1&2 but i can see why people didn't like them... one question? if u didn;t like the first, why see the 2nd?
ok then by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 03:17:17 PM
Good on DarthChainsaw for speaking his mind, and being a bit mroe reasonable. And Stoopid obviously has bailed, up to him. Darthanus, lighten up.
Don'tcha just luv Sundays...? by Basil Fawlty	May 23rd, 2004 03:29:22 PM
Funniest. Talkback. Ever! You guys crack me up. Nice review by the way bradzp, had the same fears that it was gonna go south, though I think Frakes is a fine director who just needs a good script. You mentioned you were heading to Uni to study Film, just finished mine, whereabouts you heading? Oh and stoopid - that show with Zelda - Terrahawks man! Loved that, way better than Thunderbirds...
Jesus Christ bradzp, by Fortinbras	May 23rd, 2004 05:39:06 PM
never have I seen a finer example of the illiterate cretins being sacrificed by Nu-Labor to send 50% of the British population to "Uni". Here's a couple of tips for you sonny: 1. No one at an actual university (as opposed to a former polytechnic) ever refers to it as "uni", unless by chance they have dreadful, socially ascendent parents trying to outdo each other at Bank Holiday barbecues. 2. You might want to consider remedial English instead of Film Studies as in all likelihood you'll end up in a call-centre.
Uni! by bradzp	May 23rd, 2004 05:52:19 PM
I'm heading to Bristol UWE Basil, and to you Fortinbrass, i'm currently on an A in A-level english language, and was typing in shorthand because i was at work and didn't want to get caught. I honestly didn't think that talkback was a place for garammatical accuracy, If you're so smart, why are you sitting there taking the piss out of someone who bothered to write a review for you to read? And for you're information down here in Surrey, University is constantly refered to as Uni, because it's a hell of a lot easier to say in passing conversation that 'University' every single time. Next time i have a conversation i'll remember not to use any abbreviations, and i'll remember to pronounce every syllable. F-U!
THUNDERTURDS. nuff said. by logansden	May 23rd, 2004 06:02:06 PM

damn.... by Darlef	May 23rd, 2004 06:38:44 PM
...shrek 2 opened big....
Yeesh by Magic Hands	May 23rd, 2004 06:42:00 PM
You could have stuck old Jonny Frakes in a chair, played him TB tapes til you were blue in the face, given him 200million dollars and hopefully got a half decent attempt. With FAB1 as a Ford as Rolls Royce were far too busy, a poor start could get worse really. You've gotta worry.
by Fortinbras	May 23rd, 2004 07:04:17 PM

College by Fortinbras	May 23rd, 2004 07:15:00 PM
bradzp I apologise; given that Bristol UWE is a former polytechnic granted university status to placate second class morons like you who're too thick for proper courses, AND you come from Surrey which is populated by the same socially ascendent morons I referred to earlier, feel free to carry on saying "uni". Just don't expect any respectable employer to take you seriously. And I'm usually quite content to just lurk, but your hate crime against the English language prompted me to register my disdain.
by darthsilly	May 23rd, 2004 07:59:17 PM
stoopid, Zelda was from terrahawks if you are still interested, by the way I thought the first trailer from thunderbirds was great, but I saw the second and thought "what the fuck 'Spy Kids'" so there died the dream of a good thunderbirds movie. I don't know why they didn't let Peter Hewitt do it, hes ideas sounded alot better
ShadowInc, Trey and Matt were doing 'Team America', but i think by Declan_Swartz	May 23rd, 2004 08:24:24 PM

Christ almighty. by raw_bean	May 23rd, 2004 08:34:11 PM
Just as I was enjoying the hilarity of a Talkback populated with juvenile, argumentative cretins, along comes a snobby, elitist and utterly despicable scumbag called fotrinbrass to ruin my fun. What's bothering you mate, Daddy not buy you a new Porsche this year? My 'uni', scummy place that it is, is wasting money it could be spending courting rich folks, on doing such 'working class' things as helping me get genuine, practically applicable work experience that can help me build a worthwhile career and contribute positively to my community and my country. I realise this is time I could better spend brown-nosing toffs and playing cricket in an 'old University', but what more can a working class pleb like me aspire to in life? I'm not normally an abusive or argumentative soul, but you make me feel physically sick, and I've had enough alcohol to not care about causing offence. Still, in the interests of keeping the peace, if you prefer the kind of education where the important things ar being able to 'hit a six, sing the school song very loud and take a hot crumpet from behind without blubbing', all power to you.
I meant 'are', not 'ar'. by raw_bean	May 23rd, 2004 08:40:53 PM
The effects of a night toasting a friend's birthday, or the sign of a second rate education provided by my 'trumped up poly'? I leave it up to our resident snob to decide.
Oops, and the person in question is 'fortinbrass', not 'fotrinbr by raw_bean	May 23rd, 2004 08:50:51 PM
See above.
Sorry Old Bean by Fortinbras	May 23rd, 2004 08:59:47 PM
Don't confuse educational elitism with some class driven nonsense. I'm from a shithole mining town and went to a comp, yet still managed to gain a working knowledge of the English language and more importantly get into medical school; where I can assure you that, after graduation, I'll build a worthwhile career and contribute positively to my community and my country. Hopefully by failing to save a waster like you in the operating theatre.
I am high by squidman	May 23rd, 2004 11:16:55 PM
Okay. I'm high right now. I tried calling everyone i know, and all of their cel-phones are off (is it "cell" or "cel"?). They probalby knew I'd be calling. I don' t even remember what the subject of this talk-back is about, actually. I've always loved comic books and sci-fi. I went to my first major comic book convention this weekend, and foud it to be the most depressing thing I've ever seen. That 2-year old girl did NOT want to be dressed like a stormtrooper. There was a porn-star there, though. I guess that's it. Watching FUTURAMA right now. Hope you all have a nice week.
7am in the morning by Wyrdy the Gerbil	May 24th, 2004 01:50:42 AM
and at least ive now had my full ration of laughter for the day :)
MEGAS XLR!!! by FNORDcinco1	May 24th, 2004 02:09:44 AM
GO S-FORCE!!!
tbirdsvscatwoman by non-existent-man	May 24th, 2004 02:16:00 AM
i wonder which is gonna suck more?
So no-ones interested in the trailer? by AtomicHyperbole	May 24th, 2004 03:50:04 AM
So, after nearly 30 years, no-ones noticed the trailer news? Did IQ's suddenly drop when I was away? Sod the review, the biggest news comes before it.
Well, that's a surprise. by raw_bean	May 24th, 2004 06:03:51 AM
fortinbrass is not a cad, but a bounder. If the attitude you've displayed is the product of you rising to the heights of an 'old university' education and not a toff's upbringing, I'm all the more glad to be going to a 'uni'. I'm most interesting in hearing how you arrived at the classification of myself as a 'waster'. ------- And they say Doctors are too arrogant, hah!
Oh, and I too managed to glean a decent grounding in English fro by raw_bean	May 24th, 2004 06:09:06 AM
but it was from my parents that I learned humility and politeness to strangers. Unfortunately, seeing the lack of those qualitites in others tends to cause me to drop them myself. I try to remain open, friendly and non-judgemental towards anyone who aspires to similar traits, but as far as I'm concerned, the arrogant and hateful attack on a stranger you made was an open invitation to receive the same.
Did anyone watch the Thunderbirds repeats on British TV (Sunday by workshed	May 24th, 2004 07:05:07 AM
Definitely the funniest thing on telly at the time. Made my sides split on a weekly basis. T'was utterly surreal.
I got 'cad' and 'bounder' the wrong way 'round, not that anyone by raw_bean	May 24th, 2004 07:14:43 AM
I did indeed see Thunderbirds dubbed into Punjabi, workshed. Piss funny, and a way I could continue enjoying the program after I was old enough to realise how cheesy and stupid it usually was. ------- I must admit, the thought of Ben Kingsley as the Hood does make my spine tingle in anticipation. Just like Phil Jupitus, I found the Hood truly terrifying as a child.
A slightly more level headed review by Lightwave7871	May 24th, 2004 07:42:19 AM
can be found here -> http://www.zetaminor.com/film_ reviews/thunderbirds_film_revi ew.htm After all I dont quite know what the hell anyone would expect from a movie of a KIDS SHOW.... oh hold on did anyone miss that last bit I said KIDS SHOW aimed at 8 TO 10 YEAR OLDS! Its not great but then I don't see how it ever could be... after all we grew up... the target market for this film didn't...
I think it was a POSITIVE Review! by Deandome	May 24th, 2004 11:53:10 AM
There are a lot more kids than there are hardcore Thunderbirds fans!! You really want/expect some retro geekfest for with smoking puppets?? I AM a hardcore fan, as is my 4 y.o. kid, and it sounds to me like this movie is spot on for us. Good acting, good effects, 'family values'. Sorry it's not all dark & sinister & targeted at 40-50 year olds who remember the old series (all 10,000 of us!). Maybe, gasp, lots of families who know squat about the series might have fun too. And speaking as a father, it's about fucking time there's been something that fairly 'boy-specific'. There are dozens of princess/pony/LibyLu/American Girl 'girl-power' entertainment options, but god forbid anyone make something where there isn't a little girl who isn't smarter than all the boys, or even with NO GIRLS, as this movie seems to be (dunno how big a role TinTin has).
Saw it -- loved it! by Mr Stonky	Jul 18th, 2004 12:52:40 PM
Just got back from watching Thunderbirds with my 4 year-old. She loved it, and I thought it was a very respectful homage to the original series, with great effects and fun performances from Ben Kingsley, Parker and Lady Penelope. Don't go expecting Shakespeare -- this is a kids' film, and an enjoyable one at that, especially considering the tight budget.

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Early Test Screening of the Theatrical Remake of THUNDERBIRDS is lame lame lame sounding!

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