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AICN COMICS! @$$Hole Reviews A-Plenty!!

God-dammit by Dog Of Mystery	Nov 20th, 2003 06:56:12 AM
Not only do I need to run out and buy more comics...I need to get off my ass and read the comics I bought last week. I suck.
What is it with the hulk, have they run out of damn green ink!!! by TheAquabatman	Nov 20th, 2003 07:41:32 AM
I've had it with the hulk, I'll wait for the new animated series or write and draw my own damn comics. I concur... geesh.
Guess Bug didn't read Meltzer's GA arc by Devlyn16	Nov 20th, 2003 07:42:46 AM
where we see Green arrow holding an old picture of himself [pre-costume] holding his infant son Connor.
Green Arrow/Titans by dougmac	Nov 20th, 2003 08:22:19 AM
First off, Ollie knew about Conner as witnessed by the photo, but Conner never met Ollie until he was a young adult. Secondly, as good as Smith's run was and as great as Meltzer's run was, Conner Hawke was a great character that has been unfortunately marginalized by bringing back Ollie. I love Ollie, but it is a shame that Conner couldn't find a new place to shine in the JLA or JSA (he would fit in well with the family/legacy theme there) or even as a Titan or an Outsider. About the Titans, Cassie is a regualr girl? She may not have been born an amazon, but she has been granted flight and super-strength; so it's hard to call her regular. And I agree with the review, Tim Drake is being established as a great character far earlier than they did with Dick Grayson.
Teen Titans are a poor man's X-Men by Rupee88	Nov 20th, 2003 08:53:04 AM
Sure the Teen Titans were around long ago, but the present incarnation (and the 80s version) is just a cheap copy of the X-Men...a bunch of super-powered teenagers with their soap opera problems and disagreements. I can't beleve so many people buy this trash. Go read some Alan Moore if you can understand it...
I don't think you can even get Robert E. Howard's original Conan by rev_skarekroe	Nov 20th, 2003 09:49:25 AM
The versions available now are heavily edited by the likes of L. Sprague deCamp and Lin Carter, who changed them to fit their own, later Conan stories. Unless they've changed something recently... sk
Hulk, I Agree by AlgertMopper	Nov 20th, 2003 09:51:46 AM
Hulk is soooooooooo slooooooow, it stupid, i mean, hulk got attacked by some stupid raptor-rats and he looses it. UH, NO! HULK SMASH!
The Walking Dead by Gustav Niemann	Nov 20th, 2003 10:08:17 AM
Has anyone else bothered to check out The Walking Dead yet? I've read the first two issues so far and I've got to say it's a damn fine read. If you're a fan of Zombie stuff you've really got to give it a shot. Already it's far more gripping than the Zombie World books Dark Horse put out a few years back. I'm not familiar with the creative team but the writing's solid and Tony Moore's art makes me think of Steve Dillon. It's not a crummy gore comic where images of decaying zombies (although the zombies do look great in it) take precedence over story and character. Nope, it's very much in line with the tone of the Romero zombie films where you really get into the human struggle to survive in a post-apocalyptic world.
The Walking Dead by Xandr37	Nov 20th, 2003 10:29:37 AM
I think I recall the first issue being reviewed here. After the second issue it still has my interest. The fact that they didn't stretch out his search for his family into like 20 issues makes me hopeful for the future of this comic. I guess writers actually get to the point when they're not writing with a future trade in mind. It's a nice change. By the way did you know when a girl has sex with five guys it's called a Lelko. Happy reading.
Preach on about Titans, Brother Sleazy! by hulkdog	Nov 20th, 2003 10:52:03 AM
It's good. Although I think Outsiders is good too, although you seem to have a different opinion on that one.
Speaking of Dinosaur comics- by RenoNevada2000	Nov 20th, 2003 10:56:46 AM
Whatever happened to TYRANT? That book was pretty darn engrossing.
Rupee88 your over-inflated ego is calling by Psynapse	Nov 20th, 2003 11:32:12 AM
Dude, I've read Alan Moore RELIGIOUSLY throughout the last 20 years, understand perfectly what Promethea is really all about AND I like the new TiTans book plenty BECAUSE IT'S GOOD you arrogant elitist asshole. When you've stopped being such a ratfuck snob fanboy then maybe someone will value your opinion over dogshit. Understand THIS (comics is a visual mediun you see, so while I'm visualizing my boot hitting the quantum singularity that is your sphincter how's aboot you visualize my middle finger salute because it's here strictly for YOUR viewing pleasure) ya buttmunch. >:(
Yep, Buzz Maverik reviewed the first issue of WALKING DEAD. He h by Dave_F	Nov 20th, 2003 11:57:18 AM
Madness? Well, I'm a bit of a zombie-fan, having been scarred by DAWN OF THE DEAD at a young age, so I gave it a look too. My take was more along the lines of "solid," but I think I've been spoiled on the creepyness of some of the recent horror manga I've read - stuff like GYO and UZUMAKI. So I wasn't planning to stick with WALKING DEAD, but I keep hearing good things about it, so I'm gonna give it a re-read and take in the second issue too. Also been hearing much praise for Kirkman's superhero book for Image, INCINCIBLE, so that's on the table as well. Coverage to follow soon... ********* Aside: did anyone here catch the ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE that came out in October? Pretty cool stuff. It's a prose book that made its way to my comic store, and it's literally an instructional book on zombies, their physiology and eating habits, and how best to protect yourself from 'em. The beauty is that it's played 100% completely straight. It'd probably be a nice little companion piece to THE WALKING DEAD for those who've got zombie-fever. Hey, look, I even found its official link at Random House: http://www.randomhouse.com/cro wn/zombiesurvivalguide/
Reno, it like to've killed me when TYRANT dried up... by Dave_F	Nov 20th, 2003 12:16:02 PM
Man, there was a comic that was really pushing the boundaries of what the medium was capable of, and the research behind it was in-fucking-sane. Remember the footnotes to rival FROM HELL? But it died of a terminally weak market when the industry went bust in the early 90's, glutted on the excesses of Image, gimmick covers, and the mongrel speculators who saw comics as little more than a way to make a buck. Bit of a pisser, that. That same industry collapse killed off NEXT MEN, too, which I think was the last really vibrant series that John Byrne worked on. Anyway, you can read Steve Bissette's brief post-mortem on TYRANT in this FAQ: http://www.comicon.com/bissett e/faq.htm#one It's now several years out of date, but the salient facts are all there. Incidentally, Bissette wrote the introduction for the first PALEO trade paperback.
First! by Spaz_Monkey	Nov 20th, 2003 12:32:21 PM
sorry. I had to. i love the ijits who are halfway down the list and honestly think they're first............. Back to the point, I think the reason Johns' work has been slipping as of late is that he's spreading himself too thin. Simply put, he's writing too many books. He needs to drop Marvel books, and stick with DC, where we won't have to worry about The Atom shrinking down and sexually pleasing Power Girl............ The TV has been re-airing parts of the Michael Jackson interview where he discusses sleeping with the kids in his bed. He says the word 'sexual' a few times, and every time, he says it like 'ssssssexual'. It's really creept the way he emphasizes the first part of the word.
hate to say this by AlgertMopper	Nov 20th, 2003 12:48:52 PM
but TeenTitan was made to counter X-Men, now does this mean that Teen Titans sucked, absolutly not, Titans is just great, those old school issues with Death Stroke kick all your asses
Corm- thanks by RenoNevada2000	Nov 20th, 2003 02:53:37 PM
Thanks for the link there sir. I hope that Bisette can get the rest of the stuff he's working on out some day.
ultimate six by oat soda	Nov 20th, 2003 03:05:35 PM
So, we're on the fourth issue of this series and we get like 2 pages of the start of a fight. and no sixth member yet. plus, i still say the way they're drawing peter parker makes him look like some sort of buck-toothed mongoloid.
Rev, they're going to release a collection of Howards Conan stuf by superninja	Nov 20th, 2003 05:09:57 PM
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obi dos/tg/detail/-/0345461517/qid =1069366039/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/ 104-9089879-4123924?v=glance&s =books
Great reviews guys by superninja	Nov 20th, 2003 05:12:36 PM
That Conan issue was indeedy killer. Dug the framing device with the spoiled Persian prince. This is going to be a great series!
Uh, the sixth member is Spider-Man. by rev_skarekroe	Nov 20th, 2003 05:14:32 PM
At least that's what Norman Osborne's shooting for. Thought it was obvious from #2. sk
Corm, Some Say I'm In A Mexican Prison. Others Say I Was Killed by Buzz Maverik	Nov 20th, 2003 06:27:53 PM
...that I mistakenly freed Hong Kong Triad boss Timmy Chang and that upon discovering my error, attempted to ransom him back to his mob. As the story goes, the Triads apparently sent an army of hired killers against me, and in the process of defending myself, became the most feared Asian crime lord to ever live. To which several members of the Yakuza have been heard to reply: "Asian? He looks Jewish to me." Those wacky Yakuza. I would have thought they'd have put up more of a fight. Well, off to my finger cutting ceremony.
For Those Of You Who Are Wondering, I Kept The Gangster Boss... by Buzz Maverik	Nov 20th, 2003 07:15:59 PM
...in my garage, two boxes down from Saddam Hussein (that gold will be mine!). I eventually had to move him to a Store-Yer-Crap unit in L.A. because Hussein kept taking the wrong kind of interest in him, if you know what I mean! So it's sort of a protective custody thing! That reminds me, I gotta get one of the @$$holes to run down and feed him. Poor bastard must be half starved by now.
Thanks Buzz for the tip on Walking Dead by Gustav Niemann	Nov 20th, 2003 09:03:39 PM
Yes indeed, now that my memory has been jogged I do have Buzz to thank for turning me onto The Walking Dead. In this age of $5 comics (I'm in Canada) it's harder to blindly try stuff out and I really do trust you @$$holes to turn me onto decent books. I believe it was because of your review that I also picked up Sword of Dracula and enjoyed it as well. Cheers.
Good stuff by Fuzzyjefe	Nov 20th, 2003 09:19:17 PM
Right on about Conan. It rocked the mfh. My older brother had about seven volumes of the old school Howard Conan stories, and I devoured them all when I was 12 or 13. I cannot wait to see some of them in comic form. There's a great one where he spends almost the entire story running from a giant slug in a dead city. Can you ever get enough treasure-stealing, head-splitting, and beautiful exotic women? I say thee nay!....Man, there is just so much good stuff out there right now. Teen Titans. Fallen Angel. Supreme Power. Ultimate Marvel (or the Bendis-verse). Fables. Y. The list goes on. It's a great time to read comics.
Wolves of the Calla by Fuzzyjefe	Nov 20th, 2003 09:23:58 PM
Has anyone else out there read this book? There's a nice little nod to comics in King's latest installment of his opus. Maybe when he's done with novels, he'll do a little dabbling in the comic sand box.
You couldn't be more right about GCPD by Fantomex	Nov 20th, 2003 11:19:41 PM
Half a dozen characters that look alike dosen't make for a great book, especially with that kind of art.
TT & X-Men by Lukecash	Nov 21st, 2003 03:45:53 AM
Okay, the fact of the matter is that Teen Titans were around a little before x-men ****** Created by writer Bob Haney and editor George Kashdan for The Brave and the Bold #54 (July, 1964), Xmen were launched September 1964****The Teen Titans were created to be a Junior Justice Leuge. X men was created as a mirror to the civil rights movement.****Both books floundered in the early 70's. Mid 70's Clarmont revived x-men, WolfmanPerez-following Marvels and Clarmonts lead revived Titans in the 80's.******The thing was that Titans was co-written by Perez...and suffered when he left the book.**** I hated Young Justice because it did not take the character seriously, and it was far too jokey (First issue-women villian is stopped because her breast were to large for her to stand up.)***I love the new Teen Titans, becasue it has respect for what came before...the characters are acting like their own book counterpart. I love the fact that Robin is acting far different than Grayson...and being his own man, which is what Batman wants. I love the fact that Impulse is growing up....its a bout time! There are explinations for peoples behavoir (especially Deathstroke the Terminator) Its really great!
You're right, Hulkdog. by SleazyG.	Nov 21st, 2003 05:50:27 AM
I'm not into OUTSIDERS. This is gonna sound weird, but the problem is that I like Judd as a person but not as a comic book writer. See, I read GRADUATION DAY, and it makes OUR WORLDS AT WAR look like THE WATCHMEN. It's easily the worst thing from DC I've spent money on in a decade or more. So when I read that first issue of OUTSIDERS I really tried to give it a chance, but the previous miniseries blew it. As did the spotty characterization. As did borrowing the whole Metamoropho "who am I?" plotline from the recent DOOM PATROL run, among countless others. Fact is, the new characters bored me to coma and the old ones did nothing to wake me up. Still, that's just me, and if the new OUTSIDERS issues convince you to keep buying comics, well alright then.
Sleazy, re: Outsiders by hulkdog	Nov 21st, 2003 01:52:19 PM
To me, Outsiders isn't as good as Titans . . . yet. I just see a lot of potential with the book. The execution is off just a little bit, but when everything comes together I think it's going to be grand. Right now, the book is attempting to straddle the line between traditional super-hero action and comedy, and it's not as fine-tuned as it needs to be, but I can see it getting there. The Metamorpho storyline has been done before on multiple occasions, but I think there's a difference this time . . . he's not really Metamorpho. That's going to be interesting when it goes down. And as an aside, DC needs a team book that is not saddled with the archetypes of JLA/JSA or the youths-in-training motif of Titans. Outsiders can (or should) fill that vaccuum.
Fables (Spoilers) by Toonimator	Nov 21st, 2003 02:15:07 PM
Can't wait to see where this goes! Red Riding Hood was thought lost, the tragic love story of staying behind to fight with Boy Blue, who was under orders to leave at the last moment... with no knowledge Hood had chosen to stay behind. Now she turns up in the Mundy world! Ah... but notice the aftermath of the goblin battle? Five bodies lie on the ground: the truck-driver, his son (both Fables), and three of the four goblins that ambushed them. The truck is gone, with Hood in it, running over goblin corpses as it left. But also absent is the 4th goblin, and as Hood was new to the Mundy world, it's doubtful she'd know how to drive. The questions: was the Hood in the truck the real Red Riding Hood? Was she kidnapped by the goblin and replaced/brainwashed at the end in Fabletown? Or was she actually an agent of the Adversary all along (since arriving in the Mundy world, that is), and the ambushing goblins were there to pick her up? Hah! Love this book. Can't wait to see the reunion of Red Riding Hood and Little Boy Blue, and whether that'll shed any light on the situation. // Someone mentioned Image's INVINCIBLE. That's a fun read, just wish it was around more often. My only major beef with the latest issue is the staging of the final page: What did Atom Eve see? The same column is on her right through the whole scene, yet one of the panels has a shocked expression as if she just noticed something off to the side, yet she's still facing the same way. Did she see the body of one of her teammates? Her boyfriend? The whole team? Was the headquarters empty, and she had a nervous breakdown over the team being disbanded? Too unclear to be an effective cliffhanger. But still a fun book. Loved father & son playing catch.
Ah, Rupee 88... by SleazyG.	Nov 21st, 2003 04:21:24 PM
...I've been reading (and, shockingly, understanding) Alan Moore for at least 15 years now. What's your point? See, as anybody who's read either TOM STRONG title or TOMORROW STORIES knows, even Alan Moore respects the comics his youth was rooted in. Even Saint Alan understands comics should look cool, clearly depict action and include character development and forward momentum. He gets the goofy fun of the genre, and others should too. Just because I enjoy PROMETHEA or TOP TEN doesn't mean I can't enjoy TITANS or RUNAWAYS.
Kinda lukewarm on TEEN TITANS at the moment... by Dave_F	Nov 21st, 2003 04:43:31 PM
...but, man, what a nice looking title. That Mike McKone is dreamy, like Byrne if Byrne's art had continued to evolve. He had me sticking around on EXILES long after I should've realized I didn't have any real interest in the characters. Now TEEN TITANS is better than EXILES, but if I do end up picking up the first TITANS trade when it hits, McKone's art will be a goodly part of what motivates me. ****** Now what hasn't been brought up in all this TITANS talk, but is a big part of the appeal for Johns' stuff in my case, is that the man writes great friggin' action sequences. His FLASH stuff is my personal favorite, but the big Titans/Deathstroke/Jericho brouhaha in this latest TEEN TITANS? Fantastic. I love that Cyborg was running around for the entire issue with half his head blown apart, and the whole thing just smacked of "classic superhero action sequence." When I read superhero books, there's no way to turn off the adult part of my brain, but the kid part always takes over for a bit, and the kid part was definitely digging the issue. If I was eleven or twelve right now, TEEN TITANS would probably be my favorite book on the stands. As it stands, though, any straight-up superhero book is a bit old hat for me, but love of the genre keeps me on the lookout for story arcs of note. Hopefully, Johns will continue to come through, but even if I lose interest, this is one of those books I'm rootin' for. Now its "sister" book, OUTSIDERS, on the other hand...ugh.
Ambush Bug=Mindless drone by chien_sale	Nov 21st, 2003 05:00:38 PM
That`s the first thing i`m thinking when people say they don`t don`t like Bruce Jones`Hulk or they`re confused by it. You know the type of morons who just wants mindless shallow Geoff Johns crap.
Okay chien_sale , you explain that convoluted, unreadable preten by thecomedian	Nov 21st, 2003 05:43:06 PM
Seriously, wow us with your genius! Why the fuck is the Hulk still worth reading?
"Ambush Bug=Mindless drone. That`s the first thing i`m thinking by vroom socko	Nov 21st, 2003 06:25:56 PM
Since that's a double negative, are you saying that only mindless drones like Bruce Jones run on Hulk? (a valid, and accurate statement.) Or are you just a functional illiterate who thinks a complicated plot is the same as a complex one?
You know, chien sale... by SleazyG.	Nov 21st, 2003 06:26:46 PM
...just because somebody doesn't like something doesn't meant they don't understand it. Bug and I "understand" Bruce Jones' run just fine. What we DON'T "understand" is why it's being published. It's garbage. It isn't about The Hulk. It's about yet another boring, faceless MIB government conspiracy. Not only that, but it's been well over two years this storyline has been dragging on, and NOTHING'S FUCKING HAPPENED YET. Does everything need to be attuned to today's ADD youth market? No. But does a one or two issue story always need to be drawn out by Jones to five or six? No. I waited nearly TWO YEARS reading that title for even the SMALLEST hint of who Mr. Blue was. The problem isn't that we "don't get it" or we're mindless. The problem is it's shitty, boring, amateurish writing. It's not about The Hulk at all, and hasn't been for a long time. It's about resurrected government agents and it's about Jones not even knowing who The Absorbing Man is, much less what his powers are and it's about little lizard-things that want to eat The Hulk. Some of my favorite stories are ones where the character is written about or revealed from the perspective of a different character so we know how others think of the protagonist. That isn't what's going on here either. It's not about The Hulk, and it's barely about Bruce Banner, either. It's about some other story that bores me to tears because it's been done so many times before, and so much better. Bug is right in saying that the only thing you can really compare it to is the worst episodes of "X-Files". We're not stupid, mindless drones--we're just tired of garbage. Nice trolling attempt with the Johns crack, but I'm not gonna waste my time.
That`s the first thing i`m thinking when people say they don`t d by JonQuixote	Nov 21st, 2003 06:27:55 PM
BWHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA stop stop the mindless ones, they're the ones who don't like Bruce Jones? Right? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA wait wait It's 'cause the work is so "sophisticated" and "deep", right? Shakespeare, James Joyce...and now, Bruce Jones. "Avert your eyes, heathens. You look upon the greatness that is...Bruce Jones!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *whoa. Oh god that was good. Thank you, I needed that.
Mindless drone here... by Ambush Bug	Nov 22nd, 2003 01:13:37 AM
Just wanted to reiterate what Sleazy, JQ, and the rest of the holes have said. HULK is pure garbage. But I admit I am a mindless drone because I still buy the piece of garbage out of my love for the character and the fact that I own every frikkin issue of the mag. With each issue, I'm hoping to see the faintest glimmer of greatness from this so-called New York TImes best-selling author, and month after month I read about the Abomona-chick, Mr. Blue, Doc Samson (misspelled once again in the intro page as Doc Sampsom), and a bevy of faceless agents. It ain't the Hulk. We get three to four panels of the green guy if we're lucky every other month. We get one truth told then debunked by another false truth. And no one cares after red herring number 60. The only reason anyone should even pick up this rag is because of Deodato's art. But Deodato's art paired with Jones' writing is like gift wrapping a turd. It looks pretty, but is smells of ass. You see, chien, right there I was talking about the book and how I disliked it. I didn't call you a name or personally attack you for having a differing belief. I'm not even attacking the god-awful writer. I simply have an opinion about his work. It sucks. I respect your adoration for Jones (as misguided as it may be), but choose to have another opinion. That's the way real people with somethig to say about comics (or anything for that matter) deal with things in an intelligent way. You give reasons why you like or dislike something, not attack someone who doesn't agree with you. I challenge you, chien, you mindful rebel you, why don't you tell me why I am so off in my review by talking about the book and it's so-called merits? Maybe then you'll change this mindless drone's opinion. But I doubt it. Name calling is not a way to support a debate, and that's kind of what I like to do in these talkbacks (debate that is). I'm pretty sure that's what the rest of the @-holes think too. They must be mindless drones too, you see, since it's pretty much a consensus here at @-hole HQ that HULK is one of the most worthless pieces of writing we've seen from Marvel in a very long time. And most of us read SPIDER-MAN/BLACK CAT, so that's saying a lot.
Hulk Run. by Vrawson	Nov 22nd, 2003 02:15:19 AM
Let me start off saying that I don't think you or anyone else is stupid just because they don't like the Hulk. The laughing bit was childish and I'm surprised that anyone who took the time to write that would read Jones' run on the book. The Hulk was a "mistake of science" spawned out of the Cold War. Bruce Jones, whether on purpose or not, has taken the book back to the feelings of that time: paranoia and suspicion. The best description I have heard of this mood he has given the work is "a cross between The Prisoner and Frankenstein." Many people don't like it because it is a bit cerebral. When talking to them about it and why they don't like it, it is apparent that they have forgotten that the Hulk is not a superhero and has sucked whenever he has been written like one. The Hulk is neither menacing nor impressive when he is in every freaking panel slugging it out with this month's big bad guy. Whenever he shows up in Jones' run you know the crap has hit the fan and bad things are about to happen because the writer shows you the ramifications of the behemoth's rage and brawls. For the record as well, that Absorbing man was about as close to the actual Absorbing Man, that was originally written, as you can get plus some new mental powers that added a whole new level to the situation. Jones actually wrote him as powerful and as scary as he should be, unlike most authors who write him like every other bumbling half ass street criminal there has ever been in Marvel. Also, if that organization is a rip-off MIB then the Men in Black are seriouisly f'd up and you and I must have been reading different comics or seen totally different films about them. On top of all that you can't even compare this Hulk run to the X-Files. Here's why... THERE ARE NO SIMILARITIES. Comparisons are drawn from common parts and there are none. It has more in common with the spy novels written in the late sixties and seventies than with a TV show about aliens and supernatural goings on. "Conspiracies abound, so it must be just like the X-Files." In short, no one who likes Jones' Hulk is an idiot; no one who does not like Jones' Hulk is an idiot. We are all just morons for worrying so much about who likes it or dislikes it.
Teen Titans by Rupee88	Nov 22nd, 2003 07:20:00 AM
Ok, maybe I was a bit too hard on the Teen Titans and their fans, but I just hated them in the 80s and hate them now...I just despise the characters for some reason...they are just LAME and I still say they are a ripoff of the Claremont/Byrne X-Men. The 60s Teen Titans seem OK, but the Wolfman/Perez incarnation was not. But I probably read some dumb comics too, so I can't really criticize those of you who like the TT. As far Alan Moore goes, I read a couple of issues of Promethea and didn't really get it. Top 10 never did it for me either (although I only read #1). But I love Watchmen, Miracleman, V For Vendetta, Supreme, early Tom Strong, etc. I bought a couple of the Swamp Thing TPBs and plan to read those because I never checked those out in the past.
Uh, Vrawson? by SleazyG.	Nov 22nd, 2003 03:37:06 PM
I didin't mean "Men In Black" with Will Smith. I meant the term Men In Black--the near-legendary black-suited government agents who will supposedly swoop in unexpectedly and whisk away people who see or hear something they shouldn't. Whether it's alien abductions, assassinations, etc. There have been people talking about the Men In Black for decades; the movies and comics just borrowed the idea. Any time there are mysterious, tight-lipped government agents in a story that's how they're referred to. As for similiarities to "X-Files", try this: Convoluted conspiracy tale which takes attention away from the core characters we like and puts the attention on boring, faceless new characters. As for Jones' run being cerebral, just because something is overwrought, snail-paced and vaguely atmospheric doesn't make it cerebral. The Absorbing Man story, by the way, is why I finally walked. You see, that wasn't the Absorbing Man. I'll grant you it was nice to see him as a threat. His dialogue had a genuine menace to it. The problem is that there's no reason A.M. should have been able to jump bodies like that. If that's the story he wanted to tell, he should have done it with a new character he created. A.M.'s power is that if he physically touches something he can absorb its' properties. So why is it that sitting in a cell for a really long time would suddenly make him able to jump into other peoples' bodies? Well, he wouldn't. Hell, Jones never even bothered to explain it away with some of Morrison's "secondary mutation" stuff. He just put it out there, made the entire five or six issues about people other than Banner/Hulk, and then had a big slugfest at the end. Just like every other arc he's written. He decided on a formula, and he's clung to it with a deathgrip. You're right that Hulk shouldn't necessarily be a hero, but there's a lot of potential for this character that is going unexplored, mostly becuase he doesn't even appear in his own book. I tried to hang in there for almost two years, but in the end it's just not worth it.
Runaways by BillEmic	Nov 22nd, 2003 11:06:29 PM
Hey, I've heard nothing but positive things about Runaways, and as I am a fan of Brian K. Vaughn, I wanted to check the book out. But I've caught on late and I only have #7 and #8 - and I don't want to read them without reading the first arc. However, the trade is nowhere to be seen. I've heard rumors that it's been delayed, due to Tsunami's new trade format. Can anyone help me out? When is the Runaways trade of #-16 scheduled to come out? Thanks!
You're Welcome, Gustav! by Buzz Maverik	Nov 24th, 2003 12:15:00 PM
Those Image horror titles are good books, well worth your comic reading money! I will be reviewing more comics like those when I return from hiatus -- I'm currently working full time to free Tommy Chong from his prison term for bong sales! Selling bongs is illegal? Who knew? Next thing ya know, somebody'll get busted for the stuff ya put in the bongs...no, not the water or beer or wine...
I Understand Bruce Jones HULK Stories Because I'm Smart.... by Buzz Maverik	Nov 24th, 2003 12:38:10 PM
I get it: it's SUPPOSED to be boring. Smart people like me enjoy boring stuff! Chiming in late here because in addition to working full time to free Tommy Chong, I'm also earning extra money as Grope Coordinator for the Schwartzeneggar Administration (TO DO LIST: Try out cool line "Hey, baby, are you a Republican?"). I'm not replying to Vrawson because he has a view on the comic that I respect: he can tell you why he likes it other than repeating stuff Axel Alonso (I don't blame Bruce "I'm Glad To Have A Job" Jones as much as I do Axel "Embarassed to Be Working In Comics" Alonso) has said in interviews. Marvel has been playing a lot on this, "If you don't like it, you don't get it thing". Everyone wants to get it. Nobody wants to appear dumb. I don't mind. The emperor is naked. Like a lot of people, I liked "the direction" at first, until I realized "the direction" was going to be "the formula" and they were all going to be the same. This edgy new direction is far more restrictive than the old Hulk-encounters-a-villain-and- smashes-everything direction. They had more room to play with the other one. But I do disagree with the statement that the Hulk is not a superhero or even any kind of hero. The Hulk is a wonderful, unappreciated character because he is perhaps the most unique of all the iconic superheros. He is certainly superhuman so in a comic universe with super characters, that would create infinite superhero situations. The Hulk is also the embodiment of a good man who has gotten angry. Anger is interesting in 2003 because we've forgotten how to use it. Sure, everyone struts around like they're a bad ass ("I just told that fuckin' checker at the supermarket, boy!") but essentially we're straightjacketed and out of touch with our feelings. When we see anger, it's usually in an extreme, violent, destructive form. It's being disgruntled. BTW, if there's a disgruntled, then is there a gruntled? Is gruntled being happy? Gruntled doesn't sound too happy. The Hulk is righteous anger. It's when we get angry and we do something about a bad situation, usually at our own expense. The Hulk is also Banner's protector. Self defense is a good thing. I'd love to see the character used as a metaphor for both righteous, purifying anger and adolescent rage and tantrums. The Hulk should fluctuate between the two. I'd love to see a creative team explore the idea that maybe the Hulk is hated not just for his appearance, his appetite for destruction, but also because he gets things done, takes action and that exposes the cowardice in those around him. Love that Hulk. I want the character and the book back.
JLA: Liberty and Justice by De Selby	Nov 25th, 2003 06:44:46 PM
Hope you a$$holes are reviewing this as we speak, as it's amazing. Muchos fanboy love. More so than JLA/Avengers, even.
TT is ok, but not all that. by Homer Sexual	Nov 26th, 2003 10:21:46 AM
I know I'm in the minority, but I'm not so hot on Teen Titans, particularly "Kid Flash." I agree with another poster that these young imitations of the big 3 is boring. At least to me. But I don't buy Justice League, either, because it is STALE as can be. Teen Titans does look good, and has replaced awful Legion as my "candy" book--fun but not satisfying. It has it's moments, but is nothing special. I do love Exiles, though. It's always fast-paced yet full of character development, and anything can happen, as opposed to the static-ness of TT, JLA, etc.

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