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Elston Gunn's Weekly Recap!!

Gilliam back on track!?!! YEAH, BOYEEEE!!!! by Cash Bailey	Oct 30th, 2002 04:10:36 AM
Fuck every other piece of shit in this column, the genius is back to kick our asses. This news has made me very, very happy.
Glenn Shadix and Tim Burton by _pi_	Oct 30th, 2002 04:16:25 AM
Love them both to death. Am I first? Who cares ...
Casting News by rickyrix	Oct 30th, 2002 04:40:08 AM
The other side of simple aka Complicated, with Avril Lavigne. Shopgirl, obviously starring Winona Ryder. Renny Harlin's FULL THROTTLE soon to be renamed Charlie's Angels 3: Let's copy Speed 2. Matt Damon, no memory in The Bourne Identity, no memory in John Woo's PAYCHECK - Man, this guy has a lot to forget. "SEABISCUIT: AN AMERICAN LEGEND, starring Tobey Maguire and TOMB RAIDER 2 open on July 25 -- guess which one will sink/or get the release date changed?!? "Raw Progressive has acquired Jan Golab's book DARK SIDE OF THE FORCE aka "My so called CG life" - a kids scifi thriller starring wookies, ewoks, Jar Jar Binks, and a bunch of Platypus. Obviously directed by George "How I lost it" Lucas (who also has a cameo as God).
Geri Halliwell in a spy thriller about human organ trafficking? by Margot_Tenenbaum	Oct 30th, 2002 07:41:48 AM
You can take Geri out of the Spice Girls, but you can't take the Spice Girl out of Geri! GIRL POWER!
Why can't we get Matt Damon's memory erased permanently? by JAGUART	Oct 30th, 2002 08:38:33 AM
He's being seriously miscast as an action hero a la Mark Wahlberg. His presence in The Bourbe Identity was unnecessary. Damon as a creepy, homosexual socialite wanna-be I can buy, not this action hero stuff. Damon and Affleck will never be cool, heroic, sexy,leading men so stop this gay shit right now already. Enough. What's next, Jennifer Lopez as a nun in a Latino version of The Sound of Music? Opps, I shouldn't have said that.
Great, Jimmy Fallon is in movies now by Aquatarkusman	Oct 30th, 2002 08:49:01 AM
He may now have the opportunity to simultaneously suck in more multimedia venues than anyone else. And what paint-sniffing degenerate is giving Renny Harlin a project about speedboats? FULL THROTTLE?!? And where's Kirk Cameron when you need him?--- "Warner Bros. purchased Kelly Bowe
what was left out of the recap by durhay	Oct 30th, 2002 09:01:03 AM
Britney Spears will team up with Aerosmith to cover the Creedence Clearwater Revival song "Run Through the Jungle" for the soundtrack to THE TALISMAN.
The Talisman by Glass	Oct 30th, 2002 09:13:00 AM
This is definitely Stephen King's best work by far, superceding even the Dark Tower series in my opinion (though Wizard and Glass comes in a close second), so I have been dying to see this movie get made. It will be sensational, no doubt in my mind.
Why the hell wasn't THE PHANTOM a hit? That was simply awesome. by Lenny Nero	Oct 30th, 2002 07:31:44 PM
It was light while still rocking hard. Billy Zane is extremely underrated. It blows that Cameron turned him into such a caricature in TITANIC. Yes, I blame Cameron for that move, not Zane.
Part II:Black House, part III:? by Egon Spengler	Oct 30th, 2002 08:10:48 PM
Think about it, The Talisman trilogy! Somehow I think Straub/King have at least one more story about Jack Sawyer to come. And the Farrelly-film about conjoined twins: stupid. No, not funny-stupid, just dum.
joe ruben by AZJim	Oct 30th, 2002 09:39:39 PM
You can call him Joseph Ruben (MONEY TRAIN), but he'll always be Joseph Ruben (THE STEPFATHER) to me.
To the people making Semper Occultus... by AlwaysRight	Oct 31st, 2002 08:35:34 AM
You are flushing your money down the loo. Geri Halliwell brings all the wrong kind of name-recognition to your project. Nobody cares if she can act or not, it just isn't going to work. If you pay close attention to the Hollywood style of stunt casting, they get low-talent celebs to basically play themselves, and market it to their fans. Is this what you're trying to do? I doubt it...
Godfather IV? by rev_skarekroe	Oct 31st, 2002 10:32:24 AM
Cause pt. III was a smash. Why not just call it Godfather IV: Cashing in on the Sopranos? sk
A hole in Michelle Williams. by Christopher3	Oct 31st, 2002 11:40:21 AM
A sequel to "The Candidate"? Cool. What does "high-octane" mean anyway? Why not describe your film as "no-knock"?
P.S. by Christopher3	Oct 31st, 2002 11:41:25 AM
Jimmy Fallon acquits himself nicely of nonactor allegations in "Absolutely Fabulous," particularly the scene on the plane.
This week's recap by Alpha Zebra	Oct 31st, 2002 02:16:41 PM
Matt Damon and Greg Kinnear play small-town conjoined twins who convince a small town to make a porn movie starring them in "Stuck on the Sheets". The twist: Damon's gay, and his twin Kinnear is straight. Ben Affleck co-stars (and produces) as the affable AA counselor who falls for Kinnear.... Cillian Murphy has signed for the sequel, "Girl with a Pearl Necklace".... Gerri Haliwell's inked for "Semper Ditzus", a Forrest Gump-esque tale of a girl who achieves the pinnacle of success as an entertainer in spite of her total lack of intelligence, looks, or talent.... Jack Valenti has signed to star in "The Way of the Rat." Others circling the role included George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Geraldo Rivera.... Nicole Kidman has said "I Do" to "The Hubbard Wives". She's playing an ambitious actress who strategically marries a powerful $cientologist in the entertainment industry, only to find out she's getting less than she bargained for. The Rock is in negotiations to play her new husband's special "friend".
frank oz + stepford wives = scary by ZombieBruce	Oct 31st, 2002 07:58:20 PM
miss piggy is finally brainwashed by a p-whipped kermit into being the supportive pig face of his dreams. the end. I'm crazy trash head!!!!!!!!! GIVE ME SOME CANDY! Get me out of this fucking blue suit.

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