Hey, all. Capone in Chicago here.

The good news is: Eddie Murphy has made far worse films than IMAGINE THAT. There are no fat suits to be found and no Murphy playing a stereotypical old Asian man or him doing anything even remotely offensive outside of yelling at the occasional child. The bad news is: Eddie Murphy is still making the most consistently crappy films aimed at "family" audiences that the world has ever seen. I've given up trying to understand how Murphy lost his spine, or why I still get excited when he does something unexpected (like DREAMGIRLS or BOWFINGER). I got a review copy the other day of EDDIE MURPHY: DELIRIOUS, and my heart sank a little. What happened to that guy, those jokes, that edge, and the bold fashion statement that only red vinyl can make? But enough living in the past; let's give the crappy movies of today a chance!

IMAGINE THAT is about a crappy divorced dad named Evan (Murphy), whose young daughter Olivia (Yara Shahidi) appears to retreat into an imaginary world filled with kings, queens and princesses as a result of her parents' breakup. She has latched onto her blanket, which she drapes over her head to see and talk to this cast of make-believe friends, and it's beginning to take a toll on her school behavior and interactions with other children. Olivia is staying with her father for a few months (a situation that is never fully explained), although her mother (Nicole Ari Parker) is clearly in the picture, but he's a busy financial executive in line to take over his branch when his boss steps down. Not needing the distraction of his daughter at this time, Evan basically ignores her except when she disrupts his work.

However, one day he discovers that his daughter's imaginary friends somehow are able to analyze the financial stability of the companies he's doing research on for his clients and tell Olivia whether they are worth buying into or selling off. Their predictions are 100 percent correct, but in order to get the information from them, Evan must enter their world with his daughter and believe in their existence. Thankfully, director Karey Kirkpatrick (director of the vastly superior animated work OVER THE HEDGE) doesn't show us these invisible characters or their kingdom. We're not supposed to believe they exist, even though they are producing some fantastic results. He relies on Murphy and Shahidi's acting to convince us these people and places exist, and for the most part they do a pretty solid job getting excited enough about spending time together that the film's far-fetched plot doesn't annoy us.

Adding to some of the nice touches the film has to offer is Thomas Hayden Church as Whitefeather, another executive at Murphy's company vying for the same job he is. Whitefeather, as you might have guessed, is Native American, and he uses some of the teachings of his people to help him make his financial decisions. Kids are not going to get the jokes by and about Whitefeather, but he may be the only reason adults laugh during this movie. He's ridiculous, and without giving anything away, the character is playing a role of sorts so you don't have to feel bad about laughing at an Indian. Enjoy his scenes while you can, because the rest of the movie isn't nearly as fun.

Forgetting, if you can, that the premise of IMAGINE THAT is a man using his daughter to get ahead in business so he can ultimately spend less time with her, even if you're able to see this as a movie about a father finding the value in his daughter's company, it's still kind of awful. Yes, there's a big scene in which Murphy must publically embarrass himself in front of a large crowd to regain his kid's trust (it's a Hollywood comedy — of course there's a scene like that). The simple fact is that every single move this film makes is projected several scenes in advance, with the exception of some of the outrageous stuff that comes out of Whitefeather's mouth, and eventually even that character succumbs to predictability. And don't even get me going on the Martin Sheen cameo as the head of Murphy's company who must ultimately make the decision about which man to hire for the open job. I know Sheen isn't easily humiliated (look who his kids are for Christ's sake), but what the hell, man?

For me, the sure-fire test as to whether a movie aimed at youngsters is any good is whether the kids the audience I saw it with seemed interested in what was going on. The screening I went to was a frickin' zoo, with kids running around, taking, and doing pretty much anything but watch this miserable movie. Here's a hint: kids don't care about finance unless it involves their allowance or the tooth fairy. If you're foolish enough to get caught dead watch Imagine That, prepare to be in a constant state of agony for 80-some minutes. Enjoy!

-- Capone
capone@aintitcoolmail.com