I am – Hercules!!

A 13-hour international production adapting the seminal and acclaimed 1719 Daniel Defoe novel "The Life and Strange Surprising Adventures of Robinson Crusoe (of York, Mariner: Who lived Eight and Twenty Years all alone in an un-inhabited Island on the Coast of America, near the Mouth of the Great River of Oroonoque; Having been cast on Shore by Shipwreck, where in all the Men perished but Himself. With An Account how he was at last as strangely deliver'd by Pyrates)," NBC’s “Crusoe” comes from veteran TV writer Stephen Gallagher, who wrote on the 20th century version of “Doctor Who” and created the original British version of “Eleventh Hour.”

“Crusoe” is a very silly show, poorly plotted, inconsistent in tone and packed with lame quips, underwritten characters and dull flashbacks starring the show’s most recognizable actors, Sean Bean and Sam Neill. One senses it was pitched as “Pirates of the Caribbean” meets “Lost,” but it’s far more evocative of “Xena” or the old “Beastmaster” series. Steer yourself far from it, or find your attention span scuttled.

USA Today says:

This season, it's viewers who have been left stranded. Nowhere is that more true than at NBC, which, pound for pound, has produced the worst new fall slate since those heady days of Manimal and Mr. Smith. Only in a year in which the network has already given us Knight Rider, Kath & Kim and My Own Worst Enemy could Crusoe be said to exceed expectations. It's bad, but it's not that bad. … considering the talent involved and the money spent, it's best to ratchet back your comparison points to syndicated fantasies like Hercules. … you may find yourself tiring of plot holes you can steer a galleon through and the second-rate nature of much of the cast, and wondering how you make a series out of two people trapped on a deserted island. Which is why the big question isn't how Crusoe gets off this island, but whether you'll come back. …

The New York Times says:

… Crusoe jovially makes Friday promise he’ll stay away from that silly cannibalism. The two are Crockett and Tubbs. There would be no crime in any of this if “Crusoe” didn’t feel like such a drag. “Lost” requires a vague familiarity with names that turn up on the syllabus for an introductory political theory class, but “Crusoe” just demands caffeine. It sedates, and its fabricated sentimentality does not save it. …

The Los Angeles Times says:

… Some of what happens happens just to make things colorful or keep them moving. … demanding absolute sense or ironclad consistency from a show like this is like wanting a butterfly to fly a straighter line, not only pointless but somehow unnatural. … The plot is . . . just a plot. …

The Chicago Tribune says:

… Anyone older than 10 will likely cringe at the way "Crusoe" liberally borrows from both "Lost" and "Gilligan's Island," and wonder why, exactly, it is necessary for Robinson Crusoe to remove his shirt for long periods of time. As Crusoe, Philip Winchester manages to hold on to a couple of shreds of dignity despite the script's creakier aspects. …

The Washington Post says:

… For all its shortcomings and flat flourishes, "Crusoe" has one very significant thing going for it, a virtue that can be summarized in four reassuring words: At Least It's Different. …

The San Francisco Chronicle says:

… The real trouble with "Crusoe," which is less an adaptation than a way to use elements of "Pirates of the Caribbean" and "Lost," is that it's so clumsy. Hokey and poorly paced with unfathomably lame flashbacks, it's like a relentlessly mediocre movie of the week that still has 11 more hours to go. …

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette says:

… a bit of a wreck itself. … bloated … The tone varies wildly from action-adventure to serious costume drama. …

The Fort Worth Star-Telegram says:

… it accomplishes a pretty astonishing feat: It manages to water down Defoe’s novel and the things it directly or indirectly inspired — Cast Away, Survivor, Lost — all at once, and the two-hour premiere manages to dilute Pirates of the Caribbean as well. …

Variety says:

… really a throwback to the cheerfully silly first-run syndicated hours ("Sinbad!" "Sheena!" "Conan!") … a respectable effort -- handsomely shot and offering old-fashioned end-of-the-week escapism … In a larger sense, "Crusoe" reflects the inconsistency in NBC's development approach this season, inasmuch as the show wants to be light, frothy family fun, while garnishing that with a nasty streak doubtless deemed necessary to satisfy today's jaded youth. …

The Hollywood Reporter says:

… champions swashbuckling and scenery without grasping the significance of credibility and character development. … Frequent flashbacks piece together the story of how Crusoe got into this mess. Presumably, all the dots won't be connected until the 13th and final part of the series. Meanwhile, they are mostly speed bumps in this story of a brave but terribly bland marooned mariner.

8 p.m. Friday. NBC.

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