Hey folks, I had just signed offline. It was 0619 (AICN TIME) and I was turning off the light in my room and letting the tunes of BRAZIL send me to that big set of lines in the sky, when... the telly rings.

Only psychos and Moriarty call this late/early in the morning. So I pick it up... And listen as this fella calling himself Blake Dalario fills me in on a project he seems to have some sort of psychotic fixation on.

It's called PICKING UP THE PIECES, and is a film directed by the man that brought us the fantastic film, LIKE WATER FOR CHOCOLATE... Alfonso Arau. Apparently the movie stars Woody Allen as a franticly unhinged man that kills his wife, played by Sharon Stone, and cuts her up into little pieces. It seems, that Woody then must go on a quest to retrieve her severed hand which somehow or another ends up in a small burg in Mexico. Turns out that some church has deemed it as a holy relic possessing miraculous powers by a nympho parish priest, played by Hector Elizondo, who seems to have a thing with Fran Drescher, an angry prostitute.

At this point the guy seemed to think someone was overhearing him and hung up. That frustrated me, so I went over to IMDB and found out that Cheech Marin was in the film... So I called up a friend who sleeps with his phone in his hand, to tell him about this insane flick, and he tells me Cheech plays Mayor Machado. The film began shooting around the first of May, and also has Kiefer Sutherland as a fat cop who used to have a thing in High School with Sharon Stone's hand...

I don't know... I've been up too late to rationally think, but I thought (if you could call it that) that this sounded cool. And the cast is just a killer, eh? Has anyone heard anymore?