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‘The Enemy Always Wins!!’
Sunday Brings 2017’s Almost-

I am – Hercules!!

HBO says of “Beyond The Wall”:

“Jon's mission continues north of the wall, but the odds against his ragged band of misfits may be greater than he imagined.”

Gigantic spoilers for this weekend’s “Beyond The Wall” lurk in invisotext.  Seriously, don't read them.

Sansa and Arya will plot against each other over Sansa’s teen note begging Robb to swear fealty to King Joffrey.

The white walkers will reveal they sport ice javelins among their arsenal.

One of the javelins kills the dragon Viserion, who becomes the Night King’s largest slave.

Thoros of Myr, who kept resurrecting Beric Dondarrion, will die himself thanks to a zombie bear.

Jon will be rescued by his Uncle Benjen, who dies in the effort to put Jon on a fleeing horse.

A Daenerys-driven Drogon will save most of Team Jon.

Previously. On “Game Of Thrones.”

* Samwell’s father and brother refuse to bend the knee and end up extra-crispy Tarlys. An unwitting Sam instantly becomes Lord Tarly and many non-Tarly knees are subsequently bent before Drogon.

* “I just saw the Dothraki fight. They’ll beat any mercenary army,” Jaime tells Cersei. “This is no war we can win.” Jaime also tells Cersei that the late Olenna Tyrell confessed to engineering Joffrey’s death and that Tyrion was not involved.

* The mammoth Drogon gives Dany’s nephew, King Jon, a good sniff.  Will Jon be riding Rhaegal, named for Jon's biological father, next week, or will we have to wait for 2019?

Jorah Mormont, no longer covered in greyscale, finally gets a hug from Dany.

* Sam suggests the archmaesters throw their support behind King Jon’s war against the undead.

* Over drinks, Varys confesses to Tyrion he is having uneasy flashbacks to the Mad King, who also burned his enemies alive.

* Jon learns that Arya and Bran have reunited with Sansa at Winterfell. Jorah and Jon agree to go north to kidnap a zombie to convince Cersei the army of the dead is real.  Tyrion, meanwhile, heads south to propose a truce with Cersei, via Jaime.

* Davos collects King Robert’s bastard Gendry, who has grown weary of arming the family who killed his father. Gendry adeptly and literally hammers to death a pair of goldcloaks who recognize Tyrion.

* Jaime takes Dany’s offer of a truce to Cersei. “If we want to beat her we have to be clever. We have to fight her like father would have,” says Cersei, who also reveals she’s pregnant and intends to make no secret of Jaime being the father.

* Robert Baratheon’s bastard meets Ned Stark’s "bastard" and volunteers to help Jon kidnap a zombie.

* Gilly reveals to Sam that High Septon Maynard secretly married Prince Raegar Targaryen (Dany’s brother and Jon Snow’s secret father) to Lyanna Stark (Ned’s sister and Jon Snow’s secret mother) in Dorne. This makes Jon the Targaryen with the best claim to the Iron Throne.

* Lord Samwell Tarly gathers some White Walker lit and flees Oldtown with Gilly and Little Sam.

* Arya spies on Petyr Baelish and discovers Sansa’s note instructing brother Robb Stark to swear fealty to King Joffrey.

* Sandor Clegane, Beric Dondarrion, Thoros of Myr and Tormund Giantsbane join Jon, Jorah and Gendry in their quest to kidnap a white walker.

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