Hey, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab.
HERCULES THE STRONG seems to believe that ROSWELL keeps getting better. I've given it a few chances, and there's something about the tone of the show that rubs me wrong. With TV especially, you're inviting an aesthetic into your home once a week. Some shows you watch because you just like the feel of them, the look of them, the sound of them. Other shows never work for you because something just strikes you wrong right away. Here's HERC to explain why ROSWELL has, for him, really started hitting its stride in this sophomore year.
ROSWELL 2.5 FAQ
WHAT’S IT CALLED?
“The End of the World.”
Because that’s what Max Evans travels back in time to prevent in this “Terminator”-evoking epic. The show’s opening, set in 2014 (“minutes before the fall,” according to a superimposition), depicts thirtysomething versions of Liz and Max urgently preparing to use the Grenelyth to create a “tear in spacetime” to send Max back to 2000. FutureMax’s mission: to ensure Max and Liz never consummate their relationship.
Series creator Jason Katims is credited with the teleplay.
Yes, “Roswell” continues to cement its status as “most improved” series of the season with an episode that bolsters the show’s premise with a new, much more compelling reason to keep Max and Liz apart. Things should get considerably more interesting following tonight’s events.
UM, WHAT’S A GRANOLATH?
Grenelyth. It’s that thing Isabel discovered at the conclusion of 2.3. The giant, (still) mysterious cone-looking deal the alien congresswoman was so anxious to find. The Grenelyth.
WHAT ARE FUTURELIZ AND FUTUREMAX LIKE?
Pretty much like PresentLiz and PresentMax. Liz sports darker lipstick and a slightly shorter ‘do while Max has grown his hair out to approximate a late-era Michael Hutchence look. Both have taken to wearing clothing made of what appears to be shiny gray vinyl (presumably FutureDenim). There is no indication as to what they do for a living (if anything), whether they still live in Roswell, whether they drove to the Grenelyth a hovercar, or whether they now maintain their own army of robot domestics.
IF MAX AND LIZ CONSUMATE THEIR ROMANCE, THE WORLD WILL END?
Apparently. In FutureMax’s timeline, the Max-Liz romance drives Tess away from Roswell. BIG mistake. Huge. “It turned out Tess was critical to our survival,” explains FutureMax. “The four of us – Michael, Isabel, Tess and I – we made a complete unit. We all had different gifts. And with one of us missing we weren’t as strong.” When the evil aliens set about conquering the Earth, the remaining Roswell aliens find themselves ill-equipped to repel them.
DOES THE TELEPLAY ACTUALLY BOTHER TO PURSUE OTHER PLOTLINES?
It does. Michael grows suspicious of the Crashdown’s new hottie waitress, especially since she blew into town after “the signal” began leading various interested parties to town. Michael figures she’s an alien or a government spy, or both. He “pretends” to succumb to her sexual entreaties in an effort to learn more, much to Maria’s horror.
WHAT ELSE DO WE LEARN?
That Max’s love for Liz plumbs considerable depths. As Liz and FutureMax keep planting obstacles, Max keeps overcoming them, demonstrating each time a new level of adoration for his little brunette Earth girl.
It turns out Liz may sometime in the next 14 years acquire a friend named Serena.
HERC’S RATING FOR “ROSWELL” 2.5?
The Hercules T. Strong Rating System:
**** better than most motion pictures
*** actually worth your valuable time
** as horrible as most stuff on TV
* makes you quietly pray for bulletins
I will one day warn you not to defy me!