Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. You read that right. The White House today responded to a petition that that demanded resources and funding be secured to finance the construction of a Death Star by 2016.

You see, American citizens have a constitutional right to petition our government and with the internet it’s easier than ever. All you have to do is go to whitehouse.gov, sign up and you’re on your way to starting an official petition. The White House is obligated to respond if a petition reaches a certain amount of verified signatures, usually 25,000.

So, somebody petitioned the Obama Administration to build a Death Star and that petition got nearly 35,000 signatures, so the White Issued a response, from Paul Shawcross, chief of the White House Office of Management and Budget’s science and space branch.

I could run down how awesome and nerdy this petition is, but why don’t you read it for yourself:

I love the reference to NASA’s Commercial Crew and Cargo Program Office (aka C3PO), the constant right on references to Star Wars and the fairly common sense political responses, like “The Administration does not support blowing up planets.”

But fine, I guess we can’t spend $850,000,000,000,000,000 on a Death Star because of Obamacare. Great. Obama’s America, I’m tellin’ you.

Plus, I think it’s rigged. Can’t quite put my finger on why, but something tells me President Obama might be more of a Trekkie…

-Eric Vespe
”Quint”
quint@aintitcool.com
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