Cool News
Kevin Smith Is Heading Back To The Quick Stop One More Time!!
The Kidd here...
We really shouldn't be surprised by today's announcement from Kevin Smith that he'll be doing one more CLERKS film. I was discussing Smith's claims of pending retirement with someone earlier this week, and, based on his idea of revisiting the characters of Dante and Randal for CLERKS II at a point when he had something to say about life in his 30s, it didn't seem out of the realm of possibility to me that he might do something similar as he got deeper into his 40s.
Once Jeff Anderson signs on, things should start progressing forward in some respect, but how soon is really reliant on Smith's plans for HIT SOMEBODY. Just this week, the scope of that film changed yet again, shifting once more from a two-picture story to now a miniseries (AMC is presumed to be the home for such a project, considering their successful dealings with Smith on COMIC BOOK MEN). By Smith's own admission, he hopes to get that one shooting sometime in 2013, but is it possible that CLERKS III might take priority and delay HIT SOMEBODY even further? And if so, how are we going to get another CLERKS - as the traveling roadshow Smith's been peddling the past few years with premium ticket prices (paying $100+ to see RED STATE, even if it came with a Kevin Smith Q&A seemed a bit ridiculous), or as the traditional theatrical release? VOD perhaps even?
There are plenty of questions to be answered about this project that seemingly came out of nowhere, but, if Smith can whip up yet another Jersey tale with the quickness like this, how legit is any of his talk of retirement?
-Billy Donnelly
"The Infamous Billy The Kidd"
Follow me on Twitter.

Readers Talkback
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:18 p.m. CST
It's called CLERKS 3, and once you see it you'll know the name and what it stands for
by keyserSOZE
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:18 p.m. CST
Clerks 3? Lame. I've seen that idea for about a month now.
by Stereotypical Evil Archer
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I'm pretty sure I'll be able to sleep at night without wondering how things turned out for Dante.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:20 p.m. CST
Headgeek has chosen Clerks 3... Here's Why...
by Stereotypical Evil Archer
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It's where he's most comfortable. now Clerks2 wasn't as good as the original, but it was far superior to Cop Out.
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Since The Goon beat it to the punch, though one thing The Goon was sorely missing was the Zevon song Smith has basically claimed dibs on.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:21 p.m. CST
Remember when he closed the book on the Askewniverse in DOGMA?
by CRISPIN_GLOVERS_ACID_FLASHBACK
One more trip to the well.
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No IDs, no tracking ... you get the idea. Trouble finds them. Actually, that works remarkably well here.
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How many music-montages were in that piece of shit? 3? 4? Then it ends with Randall declaring his love for Dante and they buy the Quickstop. The only think I liked in that cinematic turd was Randall ragging on LOTR.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:24 p.m. CST
I would rather Clerks 3 be his last film than Hit Somebody.
by kindofabigdeal
I really enjoyed the first two no matter what you guys say. This should be his swan song if he really is going to retire from making movies. I think even a crappy Smith movie is better than some of the shit Hollywood if forcing down our throats. It should end with one of them dying in the arms of the other. Then their can be a scene like at the end of Big Fish where they are running back to the Quick Stop and come across every character that has appeared in Smith movie. Maybe I'm just nostalgic for the movies that I grew up with during my stoner years. But I do feel that he is a smart film maker who always seems like he has something to say whether or not he thinks he does or not.
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Casually-profane, not nearly as intelligent or funny as he thinks he is, and his movies are terrible. I want the characters in Clerks to die horrible, violent deaths.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:26 p.m. CST
Fuck yeah I love this porno grade shit he does. Fuckitall filmmaking at it's finest. Red State was a flawless epic though. Perfect movie.
by UltraTron
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Clerks 2 wasn't a masterpiece but I do love watching Dante and Randall. Count me in.
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Why The Avengers is better than The Dark Knight Returns...............
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:27 p.m. CST
Kevin Smith is alright. Just needs to order less saturated fat from pink dot. Like about 300 pounds less.
by UltraTron
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I can't wait. I need to be in this movie.
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Fuck the sequel ... what a piece of shit.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:29 p.m. CST
And needs to make more great movies like Red State with amazing John Goodman and the other guy from kill bill, dusk, planet, etc
by UltraTron
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And I've seen him for about a month now. Now Josey Wales syndrome there.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:31 p.m. CST
Smith knows what he is. I wish he'd just admit he's a shit filmmaker
by daggor
People enjoy listening to him bullshit about stuff, and watching cheap crap movies where people bullshit about stuff. He can't direct a proper movie to save his life, but the money is in the fans hanging on his every word. He is 25% charisma and 75% confidence. Zero talent.
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C'mon, Kev, aint your secret stash big enough already? Oh well, I guess more power to him if he's able to bilk white trash scum and juvenile stoner filth into paying $100 a ticket to watch his fat ass talk about Batman and fist-fucking.
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...and then I saw DOGMA. MAN that was an awful movie. He managed to, somehow, get a bad performance out of Alan Rickman. ALAN FUCKING RICKMAN! How do you DO that? I saw JAY AND SILENT BOB STRIKE BACK...I saw CLERKS (rented them both) and just didn't find them in the least bit appealing. I think I grew up. I'd say Smith needs to do so as well but he knows his audience. He knows what brings the money in. If it ain't broke etc. etc.
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These are how I get my weekly dose of Smith these days and the idea of Hit Somebody as a mini-series very much appeals to me. But if he wants to close out his cinematic career with one last stop off at the QuickStop, then I can't really complain. It won't be anything amazing or groundbreaking, but it will more than likely be enjoyable and funny, as Clerks II was.
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...I thought ZACK AND MIRI was really funny. I know that goes against what I just said but I did enjoy it.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:36 p.m. CST
keysersoze I think it does qualify as a new language altogether. At least a new regional dialect. He speaks in knome? Knomian?
by UltraTron
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I'm not even supposed to be here today Brother!!
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:40 p.m. CST
UPDATE: Kevin Smith going back to the QuickStop ONE MORE time!
by CRISPIN_GLOVERS_ACID_FLASHBACK
He forgot to buy cheetos.
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If he makes a Clerks 3, put Ralph Garman in it. The dude is funny.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:44 p.m. CST
Kevin should keep directing but continue experimenting. I liked Red State a lot.
by Quake II
Kevin is a better director than he gives himself credit for. He's also a really nice guy and loyal to his fans. Who cares what he makes next? If you hate Kevin then don't see it. I never saw Cop Out and didn't bitch about it or wonder why he directed it. Like any director's films, I pick and choose the ones I want to see. I'll watch Clerk III. Why not.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 1:45 p.m. CST
I didn't like the idea of Clerks 3, but was surprised. Who knows?
by Deceased Fan
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...it takes every negative stereotype of comic book fans (accurate or not, they're negative) and amplifies them a thousandfold.
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Jay and Silent Bob's Groovy Cartoon Movie?
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I was shocked at how entertained I was by Red State. Smith always seemed like a douche to me--the fat kid getting back at he world for being picked on as a kid by a few schoolyard bullies. He has had some good moments, but his best days are probably behind him. If he can make another movie where Star Wars is not mentioned or part of some plot device, I will maybe give him another shot. Not sure Clerks 3 will be that flick, though.
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in my top 5 worst films ever
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I disagree that his best days are behind him. Listening to his weekly podcasts, the guy has a real passion for life and for entertaining people. Okay, so his humour/style is not to everyone's tastes and that's understandable. But I would urge anyone who thinks he's "washed up" to listen to something like Fat Man On Batman and see that Smith really does deliver quality entertainment (and for free, I might add).
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In a row? He has a lifetime pass in my book. (Fuck Cop Out!)
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Free podcast sounds good. I will definitely give a listen over the weekend. I might be more inclined to hear riffing on popular culture this way instead of it bogging down some of his flicks.Just my opinion. Thanks.
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Much more then a hockey flick.
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He can go out with one more crime film.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:02 p.m. CST
I'm a huge fan of Clerks and the scorching hotness of Rosario Dawson, but Clerks 2 is one of the worst movies I have ever freaking seen. It is absolutely dreadful.
by The Krypton Kid
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I guess i got a bargain with Netflix streaming eh!
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Maybe I need to see a doctor.
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All the podcasts on Smith's network are free and they update every week. I don't listen to all of them, mind; gave each one a go and found the ones I enjoyed, which are Fat Man On Batman, SModcast and Hollywood Babble-On. Give them a go, mate.
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Hell, Kevin Smith is a huge fan.
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I was really surprised how much I enjoyed Red State. I was never quite sure where the story was going. That is a good thing. Great film.
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Loved Clerks, Clerks II, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back... And REALLY loved Dogma, which I think is his best film. I like the Comic Book Men show but do find it annoying at same time... probably because I like the whole "Pawn Stars for Comic and Comic related stuff" idea but hate two of the people in it... Whoever the main guy is annoys me.. and Brian, oh man Brian PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH. It's like dude you don't even work there, why are you there ALL THE TIME. And his constant reminders that he doesn't know nothing about the comics, etc, and doesnt' care and is proud of that, but wants everyone to know he doesn't know... Dude just shut the F up.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:14 p.m. CST
I remember when Alanis closed it at the end of Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back
by Mark
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Cop Out was borderline incompetent film making. Just awful. Smith likes to paint it all as Willis not taking direction, and disrupted his thought process by being a bully on set. Willis follows up that Smith is stoned all the time and doesn't have some basic director skills and knowledge. But at the same time Red State was a total surprise and really good. Almost like a completely different person was behind the camera. Goodman and Parkes were fantastic, and showed that Smith can work with actors that are not in his circle of friends. Almost like Smith smartened up and became much more professional on set. The ending to me was shockingly un-Hollywood and ballsy. This from the guy who have the much too trite ending to Clerks II. Interested to see where Hit Somebody is going. Goon beat him to the punch, but was really much more of a tragic drama than a comedy. I just felt sorry all the time for Seann William Scott's character. He needs to come up with a decent plot for Clerks III. The second one was aimless and just a very loose sketch for Smith to make his monologues through his characters.
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For the most part I've always liked Kevin Smith the director, no matter how "amateurish" his films seem at certain times. What I think is sad is that he is a talented director who with a little work could've really goten over his technical hurdles. Unfortunately Kevin Smith the director has been overshadowed by Kevin Smith the internet pseudo-celebrity, and that seems to be where most of his effort goes into, and I think in some instances with some of the comments he makes why many people do not like him.
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that he can later complain about. dont love his films, but love to hear him talk and that makes for good content.
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Is there a need for another Clerks movie? Based on where Smith is at in his life and how Clerks 2 ended I would be very surprised if this wasn't a film about the characters starting families. Clerks was a great movie thanks in most part to the strength of the script in my opinion. I agree with krypton kid, Clerks 2 was ass-tastic, and personally I don't think i could make it through another movie with Brian O'Halloran as Dante, he's just a whiny bitch and in the gallery of movie characters, I dislike his character as much as Jar-Jar Binks.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:20 p.m. CST
Is every single thing Kevin Smith has done gold? No. Does the guy have talent? YES
by irishraidersfan
Quit with the fucking jealousy, you begrudging morons. Kevin Smith is 'one of us' who actually made it. Didn't like Clerks 2? Fair enough. How about you actually wait and see what 3 might be about, FFS...
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Smith will not retire until he smashes any remaining good will and or sway he has left into the ground.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:26 p.m. CST
Will they be cleaning out the shop from hurricane Sandy?
by Margot Tenenbaum
Will this be Sandysploitation?
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:26 p.m. CST
Smith should end it with a giant spider invasion movie
by Domi'sInnerChild
Or Jersey Girl 2.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:28 p.m. CST
Smith seems like a complete and total jerkoff with a penchant for writing good conversations.
by joel007
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Since it was basically a podcast in the time before podcasts. Not to mention how heavily the internet now covers retail servitude.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:41 p.m. CST
how embarrassing - why not just put a tent sized hockey shirt on that says, "My career is fucking over and now I'm just a big obese irrelevant POS"
by HoLottaMo
3 movies on a couple of retarded stoners? I guess if you can milk the system why not - if he can get enough brain-dead losers to fork over 10 bucks to see another of his turds more power to him.
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Yeah, most likely a cash grab, but honestly Kevin Smith is at his best when he does the View Askew stuff. Clerks II was exceptional. I don't know why he can't do better outside these films.
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it's how theyve squandered away their success and do one more cash grab film before retiring
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:43 p.m. CST
Kevin Smith might be one of the directors I've outgrown..
by Robert Evans
like Brian Levant or Dennis Dugan
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Talk about right place, right time. His podcasts are funny, if a little redundant. Comic Book Men though are the worst collection of douchebags ever put to screen.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:50 p.m. CST
Hopefully he'll have another sequence of Rosario Dawson dancing around with her glorious rack bouncing all over the place.
by Kevin D
Seriously though, I did enjoy Clerks 2 quite a bit and feel that it might possibly be his best film this side of Red State. A 3rd film should hopefully be equally as good.
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like they do with all their childhood "idols", they find every reason possible to loathe them like a rebellious teen. Oh, fandom...
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:53 p.m. CST
I will see Clerks 3 in a hearbeat. I'll be happy revisiting these characters every 10 years for the rest of my life.
by JediRob
Clerks 2 wasn't the greatest, but it had some great moments. I mean, it was never going to be Clerks. CLERKS wasn't even "Clerks." Ya know?
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Dec. 7, 2012, 2:57 p.m. CST
So will this be the one where Dante and Randall finally blow each other for 90 minutes?
by YourMomsBox3D
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Jesus Christ, let my 3 year old try to operate a videocamera for a half hour and it would be better than that crap
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:02 p.m. CST
This has got to be a cry for help to by Smith, probably because noone mentioned him to direct Star Wars Ep. 7
by dylan alvord
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And that's why Hit Somebody has cooled off. If Kevin is going to make a final movie can be something of a comic book nature? We don't need Clerks III.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:05 p.m. CST
Zack and Miri was actually pretty good. Clerks 2 tried way too hard
by kidicarus
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And I hope someday Sherri Moon Zombie and Jennifer Schwalback Smith and Tim Burton's ex (the Mars Attacks alien girl) all do a movie together and call it "Sleeping Your Way Into Films".
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:06 p.m. CST
Kevin Smith in erratic, self-idolizing PR embarrassment shocker
by reflecto
Something's wrong with the dude. Midlife crisis, depression, whatever. Ever since he began extolling the virtues of weed at age 40 or whatever, rambling endlessly to the sycophant geek press about how he was so happy being a commercial "loser" lately while simultaneously blaming everyone else for his movies' failures he's been even more intolerable than before. Red State - crap. And he should've known no one is going to greenlight his 2-part hockey movie opus. It'll never make it to TV and we all know that. Period. Clerks 3? LOL
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its not so much hating for hating's sake or rebelling against your "idol" but rather just growing out of it. I was there when he popped on the scene with Clerks. My high school self thought it was the funniest film, the truest film at the time. in a way it was. that was my life at the time. part time job--on the threshold of college. my whole world ahead of me. over the years, i was there when each of his films came out. i was one of a half dozen people in MALLRATS opening night. I (thankfully) saw CHASING AMY at a sneak preview at UT when i was a broke college student. DOGMA and JAY & SILENT BOB came out and we were there but with that last one, he was saying sood bye to his universe and I, in a way, did too. I started choosing what i saw with a little more care. Life happened and I moved on. I wasnt really excited to see his films when they were announced. I can honestly say its not him, but me. Ive grown up. Many of us have. Tiem have changed yet he has not. Some filmmakers you just have to leave behind when they dont evolve or progress. he's been making the same dick and fart joke film for 20 years now. The same can be said with Tim Burton. I'll still hold a special place in my loins (and in Burton's case--my heart) but its best we go our separate ways.
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Kevin Smith might be one of the directors I've outgrown..
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Will anybody get to see it? It seems he's burned every bridge he's had in the movie business. And I concur with the above poster; I used to be wowed by Kevin Smith, but I feel I've outgrown him, as has the rest of the world.
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The biggest mistake I ever made, in terms of ruining a film for myself, was to read the script the night before I went to see the movie. I envisioned it so much differently than what I saw on screen, primarily in terms of line delivery. I love Alan Rickman, but my god was he over the top with some of his readings in that film. The Metatron in my head was so much more deadpan and undersold lines, which I thought would have made it funnier. Rickman's line readings were only a "nyuk nyuk nyuk" away from being slapstick.
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I never saw the allure for the first film, the second was ok because it didn't look like it was made like a High School art project. I was however dissapointed that he went back on his word that the View Askew universe was done (as said above, God herself closed the book on it) and it was cheapened a bit more by the fact that he admits it was done mostly to reward Mewes for getting clean. I also think he got hosed on Jersey Girl which was a far better film than anyone dared give it credit for. Cop Out isn't oscar worthy but is just a fun film and that's ok. Red State is certainly different but once it gets going you can't turn it off. For me, the best (maybe better to say coolest) Smith films are Mallrats, Dogma, JASBSB, Jersey Girl, and Red State. Kevin's acting has got much better over the years too.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:27 p.m. CST
Maybe Clerks 3 is really the code word for Star Wars Episode 7 and he's got the job and fooled you all
by dylan alvord
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Was an ok movie, what stands out most in my mind about it was the twist towards the end. Worth seeing on Netflix just for that IMO.
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You geeks flip-flop worse than Mitt Romney. What's wrong with Comic Book Men? Too much like looking in a mirror? Smith's filmography has its ups and downs, but he's funny, clever, loyal to his fans, and Batman is his favorite comic book hero which makes him OK in my book.
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Apatow needs to stop having his wife and kids star in his movies. Funny people wasn't that bad until Sandler goes to Judd's wife's house for the last hour of the movie. Clerks 2 wasn't great, but had moments. The problem with Clerks 2 was that it tried too hard to be Clerks. I think Clerks 3 will probably be on par with Clerks 2, but it'll still be better than This is 40. Clerks 3 will probably be about Dante and Randal becoming fathers. I'm willing to give it a shot. I think weed has killed Smith's ability to write, but it could still be watchable.
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...as old, grizzled Dante.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:43 p.m. CST
While I admit to potentially missing a lot of his work...the best thing Smith has ever done...
by Darth Macchio
..is putting a naked Joey Lauren Adams in Mallrats. Thanks Mr. The Kevin Smith!
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I always thought that Kevin was a guy who had lots of ideas and he just never got to make them. But apparently he didn't. Kevin has basically given up. Clerks 3 will be a favor for Jason Mewes, to give him a job. I really would've liked to have seen Kevin do a movie like Fanboys or something about comic book fans. Like do a high school comedy about a couple of comic book nerds. Sort of Clerks in High School. He's never going to adapt a comic book movie or do Ranger Danger. He's too lazy. But a movie about comic book fans would be interesting.
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I like the Clerks movies.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:48 p.m. CST
I actually enjoyed Clerks 2, but it was mainly down to Rose's bounce boobies..
by cameron
..yes i'm that shallow (.)(.)
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It's boring, and misleading. I thought the show was going to be about Smith and his buddies talking about comics which would be pretty cool. Turns out that the comics had very little to do with the show. It was just some reality TV show about the wacky antics of comic shop employees and their friends. /yawn
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Dec. 7, 2012, 3:55 p.m. CST
I think he has changed, and maybe that change is just different. I don't have to like all of his movies. I don't have to like any. But the man makes movies(and does whatever else he wants) on his own terms. i will always be in awe of that.
by JediRob
He's created a perfect niche, and he creates and sells directly to that niche. And maybe I'm not a part of that niche anymore, but I'm happy if people have a good time with it. I totally get people not liking his stuff after 20 years, and maybe taking the piss out of him a bit. There are many Directors that I fall out with. But I never understand the specific hate hate HATRED towards Smith.
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Kevin Smith presented Bindelstiffs, which sucked Donkey Balls. He might have Clerks 3 have those kids be the new Clerks that work for Dante amd Randall. Cause I figure Smith will want to sort of have a view point of younger people to counter ballance Dante and Randall being the bosses now. I really hope he doesn't do that. Yes, I think having younger Clerks, who make the movie sort of call back to the angriness of young Randall, but those guys suck as actors and are not funny at all.
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Based solely on their writing and directing credits, Judd Apatow beats Kevin Smith.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:01 p.m. CST
Let's be honest, Smith wouldn't be "Retiring" if his films weren't tanking.
by BigTuna
He's in the direct-to-DVD world now.
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Smith says it himself, when she closed the book i you pay attention there are still quite a few pages left from the place where she was reading out of. So Smith covered his ass on that one, hea nerd just like most of us and knew people would bitch so he created himsef an out.
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Blockbuster is barely hanging on. A mom and pop video store wouldn't have a chance.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:07 p.m. CST
If all the petty insults spewed here are simply from fans outgrowing his work...
by Jay
If his films are no longer for you, than they're no longer for you. What Choppah said is completely understandable. I wish the pathetic insults on here could be excused by a such a simple explanation. But I know that's not the case. Reading a TB like this reminds me of how self-hating posters on here are. Whether they know it or not, they're not talking about Smith. They're talking about themselves. As "kingslayer" said "Too much like looking in a mirror?" While I'm not even a huge fan of his movies, I do listen to a few of his podcasts. And I can promise you that having a chat with him would be 100% more fun than having to do anything with the negative nancys who post here. What's even worse is the insults reference recent things Smith has done that could only be known if you ARE a fan who listens to his podcast. This TB is a perfect example of why everyone makes of fun of AICN. It's simply used as a punching bag for those more famous than you.
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They might as well make it a chase movie. Then, at the end they can say Jay and Silent Bob will return in Clerks Against the World Crime League.
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Kevin Smith is simply another has-been director/actor. That's what happens when DOPE becomes your best friend. And no, I am not talking about Jason Mewes.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:15 p.m. CST
Choppah, we all may have outgrown Kevin Smith, figuratively, but Smith has outgrown us all, literally.
by SergeantStedenko
Perhaps, the same can be said of Harry.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:20 p.m. CST
Maybe it works and he does Chasing Amy 2 next, doesn't everyone agree that flick is at least watchable?
by dylan alvord
And he's gotta bring all his Hollywood chums for the last hurrah, the Affleck Brothers, Damon, Chris Rock, Mark Hamill, shit maybe he could do Star Wars Episode 7, 8, 9.
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He's been a broken man since the critics savaged Cop Out and it bombed at the box office. I like the guy, and really enjoy his podcasts, but he has never mentally recovered from that disaster. It's almost like he lost the will to live and gave up on himself.
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Apatow now thinks that he's James L. Brooks, which he's not. And casting his wife and kids in everything, with major roles is just annoying. I just don't see This is 40 being good at all. At least I think Clerks 3 might have some funny parts. I think Apatow is digressing as a filmmaker too. Is his next movie going to be about a single mom with two kids, so the whole movie can be about his family?
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:24 p.m. CST
I really believe that smoking mass quantities of weed is not good for a director's career.
by SergeantStedenko
Just look at Oliver Stoned.
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That's some good context
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:34 p.m. CST
In their latest mid life crisis the guys put up a 2nd mortage on the shop and open up Dantes Disco Inferno.
by kindofabigdeal
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:34 p.m. CST
I liked Red State except for that ending. Now, that was a cop out.
by Chuck_Chuckwalla
Should have gone with your originally intended idea, Kev. It would have been brilliant. A real artist never second-guesses himself.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:35 p.m. CST
I really liked Clerks, and I was on board with Smith up until Dogma
by papabendi
After that it was apparent he had one idea and one alone. Clerks 2 was embarrassing. The musical dance scene made me cringe. Bad dialogue, everything. I think he can still make a fist of his career. |he just has to learn to direct other peoples scripts. I would have liked to have seen Fletch with Jason Lee.
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And fatty needs someway to pay for all that fucking food. Ergo, another lame Clerks. He should make a movie entitled "Exercise."
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Simply awful.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 4:52 p.m. CST
Kevin Smith, if you're reading this (and you might be), ignore these people. You're a legend, and I will go and see your movie.
by WerePlatypus
Though my wife almost puked during that donkey fucking scene, we both still love you.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5 p.m. CST
Should involve a Robbery/Hostage plot that forces old flames to union
by TheJudger
It was heading that way anyways. That or a camping trip/funeral/robbery/ hostage/ amusement park/gameshow/holiday/strange extended family type plot. With lots of jokes about assholes, pussy cocks, dikes, fags, sterotypes and geek nostalgia qoutery
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5:01 p.m. CST
Thought the first one was so bad I had to stop watching. Never saw 2... except for ONE scene. Over and over again...
by Emperor_was_a_jerk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtE6kxgV3XE
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I liked Clerks II a lot more than the original clerks. So this is good news as far as I'm concerned
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5:02 p.m. CST
and the biggest joke of all- becoming dated and old, and no longer belonging to or loving
by TheJudger
the current generation. AKA becoming the when i was young/things used to be/we never had/get off my lawn/never trust a fart gen.
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I dig Smith, he's one of the biggest success stories of my time and being and indie moviemaker, I can't help but look up to the dude. He's a nerd boy made good and a real hero to a lot of people. That said, I wish he would've expanded his horizons a little bit, I would've love to see him dabble in more big budget type stuff, more personal films, it got to the point where he was kind of doing the same thing over and over again. Would've loved to see him stretch his wings a bit.
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I enjoyed the first two films in the series.
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Love him or hate him, Kevin Smith is great at knowing how to market to his audience. Pod casts, Q&A's, merchandise, interviews, movies, comic books etc... He knows his audience, and he plays directly to them. He's not trying to win-over new fans, he has a fan base. The fans have been asking for the next chapter in the ViewAskuniverse for some time now. And unlike that bloated hack George Lucas, Smith will deliver the goods in all their "poop & fart joke" glory. Besides, I could use a good comedy. I haven't seen a good laugh-out-loud film since Bridesmaids. (Personally, I thought Red State was refreshing, as it was a different take on the horror genre and an original script that was full of unexpected surprises at every turn.)
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5:24 p.m. CST
nevermind the shit films, i can't believe people pay to see this guy
by JAMF
they actually pay to see this fat fuck in a hockey shirt parade around a stage (or sit there at least) going on about superman and shit... what a tool.
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but I must say, what he thinks passes for "content" these days is sub-Daily Mail. I also can't shake the impression that he's basically a laissez-faire liberal because it's easier than standing for something, rather than because he has genuinely come to these conclusions independently. I like the guy, I really do. I just think that the cushion of a novelty film career (and be under no illusions, it was simply "right place, right time" with Clerks) has allowed him to avoid facing real world issues for his entire adult life, like "if I get stoned every day, can I hold down a proper job?" "if my wife's convictions are strong enough, does that make up for the fact that I have none of my own?" Etc.
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What a horrible idea. I was a big Smith fan during my "late" adolescence with Clerks, Mallrats, Amy, etc. It just stopped being funny. Nothing quite as good as the shock value humor of Clerks and nothing near the pseudo-emotion of Amy. Smith screwed up when he didn't take on the Green Hornet because it scared him. I'm glad he's quitting and I highly doubt I'll even see Clerks 3 even though I tend to be a completionist with most things. Comic Book Men is atrocious....I don't find him witty and I'm shocked that Jen hasn't dumped him yet. I'll pass on this none-hit wonder.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5:47 p.m. CST
It is only fitting that the fat man die while making this movie...
by V'Shael
and actually expire on the set of the convenience store, where he once toiled in anonymity, putting on the pounds and drinking Zinfandel from a box. Die, fatty.
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MUTED!
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5:56 p.m. CST
Can't believe no one has mentioned that shitfest he did called Spoilers!
by DrMorbius
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Dec. 7, 2012, 5:59 p.m. CST
So at the end of this movie, will Metatron take off and nuke the Quick Stop from heaven?
by Bill C.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:03 p.m. CST
Kevin Smith is an artifact of the mid nineties who has been surpassed by every one of his contemporaries. you need talent and work ethic in this game and he has neither.
by dahveed1972
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:08 p.m. CST
Tarantino, Fincher, O Russel, Linklater, PTA, Aronofsky, Wes Anderson, etc.
by dahveed1972
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:09 p.m. CST
Why waste a second on someone who would have to actually learn something about filmmaking in order to be considered a hack?
by dahveed1972
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:09 p.m. CST
And hes just as bad a screenwriter. his scripts are just one extended monologue after the other. it was cute for like five minutes in 1995.
by dahveed1972
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:13 p.m. CST
He manages to give both stoners and comic geeks a bad name. that will be his lasting legacy.
by dahveed1972
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:14 p.m. CST
emperor_was_a_jerk, so you admit you don't know what you are talking about, because you haven't actually watched the films.
by Nichole
Thanks for that! So insightful.
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in some respects, we moved on as a fanbase from Kevin Smith. Post-JSBSB, the View Askew part of Smith's career should have ended on a high note with lots of laughs. Instead, due to a little turd called "Jersey Girl" it was back to the Quick Stop we went. Don't even get me started on Smith after that. I'm glad I mercifully skipped Cop Out. Given the comments here, I will give Red State a look. Still, even if we wail all over him for his failures, one should at least be glad for the fanboy contributions Smith has made in his films. Who knows, maybe his smartest decision will be to know when to quit...or maybe not. Either way, after watching his most recent Comic Con appearance, I'd say Smith still doesn't take himself too seriously and that's a good thing. In conclusion, he's a genuinely funny guy in my opinion and he should stick to that in other mediums. No harm, no foul Kevin.
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Will check this out. I get that his humor isnt for everyone but fuck them cos I find it funny.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:17 p.m. CST
DON'T DO IT SMITH!!! CLERKS AND CLERKS 2 ARE MASTERPIECE'S!!! PLEASE DON'T FUCK IT UP WITH A RETURN OF THE JEDI, GODFATHER 3 OR DAY OF THE DEAD!!! LEAVE IT THE FUCK ALONE!!!FACT!!!
by CreepyThinMan
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I don't know, i've been following him for 14 years now and loved almost everything he's done. He's like a friend that i just haven't personally met and i believe many of his fans feel much the same way. The less developed me of 14 years ago would definitely be thinking, "don't stretch yourself, keep doing Clerks stuff all the time" but now it does feel like milking that last drop out while he can. I despised Cop Out (sad what Willis did to him) and still don't know what i think about Red State...it was different and ballsy though i'll give you that. Shit, i even watched Jay And Silent Bob Get Old this week and barely laughed. Normally Smith is on fire and just love to hear him talk. He is a geek that made good but getting into weed was the BIGGEST FUCKING mistake he even could have and did make. Since then, what was a perfect run of hilarity, everything post Zack And Miri has been random cross your fingers and hope for the best. I kind of want to see Smith solider on in film and try different stuff. Mewes is supposed to be producing a new animated Clerks movie (different animation crew though?) so is Clerks 3 separate to this? I'm loyal. I'll give anything he does a go...but he really should straighten himself out.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:25 p.m. CST
That guy said Clerks and Clerks 2 are masterpieces LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
by Mel
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:26 p.m. CST
I think Smith needs to rethink the distribution strategy
by quadrupletree
The irony is as Smith gets older so does his audience. Clerks was about something he had to say about his 20's, Clerks II was triggered by something he had to say about being in your 30's. So if Clerks III is about being in your 40's... What Dante has kids now? Just like Smith has a kid. You think those people want to go pay $100 to go see your roadshow? They gotta get babysitters now. Hell, I hardly go to the movies now that I have a kid. VOD is the way to go for this series. Match the medium to your audience. Get an Arrested Development kind of deal with Netflix or Amazon. Unless he thinks college kids today care about what he has to say about being 40...
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Have we really set the bar that low? Clerks 2 was dreadful. I honestly can't think of a single thing that made me laugh. Just do the world a favor smith and focus on your pod casts. The last thing we need is a 3rd film to complete a clerks trilogy. Well, that and more star wars movies.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:36 p.m. CST
creepythinmanlives, You don't like Day of The Dead????????? Fuck you then, lost all your....wait, what I mean is,
by Nichole
I'd like you to explain that one. What the fuck son?
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Only the first 10 minutes were remotely funny and the rest was just pretentious trash.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:43 p.m. CST
CHASING AMY was OK until 'Silent' Bob went into a neverending monolouge
by Logan_1973
Smith pretty much pulled a QT and had to put too much of himself in it.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 6:50 p.m. CST
People paid $100 bucks to see fucking RED STATE?!?!?!
by eveelcapitalist
Oh my God...seriously, I caught like 20 minutes of that on ShowTime and it was an enormous piece of shit. I like Kevin Smith, I really do, but what I saw of that movie was fucking awful. $100 bucks...wow...I don't care if it's the best movie ever made but anyone who pays that much is a dimwitted asshole who just got robbed.
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An Evening With Kevin Smith. Too many times to the well - he's going back on his own commitments to not beat a dead horse until everyone hates his ass.
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...Could be pretty good. I did mention I was a Smith fan, right? I only say this to point out I'm not a rabid hater. Smith's problem with his last few movies like Red State and Zak & Miri is that the guy is all out of things to say. He's a guy that spoke for my generation. Ya know, the Slacker Gen Xer. He was the quintessential Gen Xer and he spoke for us well. At the time. And he was just a fantastic indy filmmaker to boot. But now times have changed and Kevin Smith is sort of spinning his wheels. People have moved on, Gen Xers are grown up and Kevin Smith is one more voice, albeit a hilarious one, in the wilderness. What has he done in over a decade that has the vitality of Clerks or Chasing Amy? Oh, Clerks 2 and Zak & Miri were Hi-freakin'-larious, but they were just straight forward comedies. Red State? Forget it. Kevin Smith really needs to take a step back and take stock of life as it is for him...for our generation...as it is now. Not as it was, not as it ought to be...speak of the moment, dude. You're not a political commentator and trying to find appeal among retarded college dope heads is getting pretty sad. Kevin, guy, listen to me...Ben Affleck evolved. Ben. Fucking. Affleck. You are so much better than Ben Affleck, but right now he's kicking your ass, buddy. You're better than Ben and you can be better than Ben again. Find your voice again, brutha.
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and Fat man on Batman podcast is awesome! Kev sits down and talks to Kev Connroy for an hour! Fatty gets chatty about gotham like its a real place
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Good for him. We have had our battles in the past, but out of chaos, respect was born. I am just kidding, he is fucking awful.
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That's all. Would love to see these characters again. And Elias!
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But seriously, he has enough money...he should just stop. Clerks was his best film...everything else stunk.
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As I said above, Jersey Girl is a good film with heart that got lost for two reasons. The biggest of course was the JLo/Ben thing that put this film in a bad spot especially after the joke of Gigli. Had this film been released first it might have helped. Second reason is because it was Smith's first foray into the non-Jay and Silent Bob universe for him, and with his name attached it didn't matter how good the film was it was going to be looked at a certain way by the media and some movie goers. Ben did a great job in his role, as did the little girl and despite George Carlin not having a big acting resume' this was his best role. My only complaint with the film isn't the film at all, it's the DVD commentary because Smith brought Mewes in to do it with him and Mosier even though Mewes has nothing to do with the film and Smith sounds like he's babysitting him ("Jason, what does a ___ on a film set do?" Very good Jason"). Don't get me wrong, I'm glad Jason got clean and all, it just annoyed me.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 7:40 p.m. CST
Clerks 2 was terrible. It is to Clerks, what Be Cool was to Get Shorty.
by la te ral us
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Dec. 7, 2012, 7:41 p.m. CST
Are you sure this is a live action film and not the Jay & Silent Bob animated movie that he just started tweeting about??
by la te ral us
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Dec. 7, 2012, 7:42 p.m. CST
Animated Clerks is the greatest thing Kevin Smith ever did.
by jimbojones123
Mallrats is a distant second.
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I can make one good film
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At least you used less commas this time, but every single one was incorrect. It was actually readible. Try not using any at all. Another tip is that the comma comes BEFORE the FANBOYS (For, And, Nor, But, Or, Yet, and So). One more tip is if the text after the comma doesn't make a complete sentence then it should not be there. Study more on your third grade grammar. You'll get there someday. With that being said I was just thinking the other day that kevin Smith would do another Clerks movie. Makes more sense as a trilogy. A beginning, middle, and end. Clerks II had me laughing so hard opening weekend that my abs hurt. I hope this one can do the same.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 7:56 p.m. CST
kevins bucking the trend of the tradition cinema system and he should be applauded for it.
by kingoflight
$100 a ticket to see the movie with the guy that made it, who's amazingly funny almost like a comedy show in himself. Add to that you'll be seeing the movie with other people who know his universe and won't it be a random guy off the street with his screaming kids in tow. $100 actually gets you a lot for your money.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 7:57 p.m. CST
People sure love to piss on films, don't they? Anyway...I'd see it.
by wcolbert
I enjoyed Clerks for what it was. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and Dogma were my favorites, but even Clerks 2, while the weakest Askew entry, had some merit to it and memorable moments (which I still hear people quote today). So yes. I'd see it. I'm not expecting an oscar award winning tour de force here. Jut a quaint little film about a couple of guys coping with the inevitability of getting older, moving to new and uknown stages in life, and trying to get the most enjoyment out of this ride as possible before they kick the bucket. Stop being such bitches and just enoy life. If you don't like a movie...don't watch it. Life's far too short to be wasting time shitting on a movie you don't like when you could be celebrating the things in life you DO like. Know what I mean? We all see movies coming out that have no right being made...so why invest so much energy in it if you didnt even like the second film or the first one? I can see if you were a huge fan and were concerned about the direction the film series might go. That's a legitimate greivance. But to bitch just for the sake of tearing something down? Why? Isn't there a toddler you could be kneeing in the face right now if that's the kind of thing you like to do?
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Why is he still around?
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Big clerks thou so pretty happy about the news
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Dec. 7, 2012, 8:40 p.m. CST
I will always support a Kevin Smith movie, his films are actually funny, fuck everyone else. Including Sandler and Carrey, those overrated unfunny hacks!!!
by notcher
And I bet there are a ton of fans of Sandler and Carrey and their poo poo jokes. Very saddened to see the hatred for Smith on this site considering the good shit he's contributed to geekdom.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 8:43 p.m. CST
Not nearly as much vitriol as I expected....maybe you stupid fat nerds are finally wising up a little bit!
by Kevin Spellman
I never understood the colossal amount of hate Kevin Smith got from web cretins, particularly talkbackers. I always thought, "shouldn't these stupid fat nerds be proud that one of their own had become so successful, especially with a DIY-ethic?" But then I remembered, "oh, that's right! They're stupid fat JEALOUS nerds." Stop being so jealous, you stupid fat nerds! Oh, and people calling him a has-been, direct-to-video director or whatever clearly aren't paying attention. The dude doesn't care what you think anymore. Hasn't since Zack and Miri underperformed at the box office. Your petty words written from your mother's basement USED to have power over him, but he finally wised up and realized that he lives in a fucking mansion and has made more money than all of you combined doing something that he loves, and that you, well....you're stupid fat jealous nerds writing bitter messages of hate on internet message boards sitting in your mothers' basements. Oh, and he's also not really that fat anymore. Take a look at any recent photo of him. You morbidly obese motherfuckers lurking around in here, take note. Bring on Clerks 3, fat man! (even though, as I just said, he doesn't read this shit anymore) I was never really all that excited about Hit Somebody anyway. I just don't share his love of hockey. But you're coming off of the best movie you've ever made, for the love of god, please don't stop!
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more movies that require less dick and fart jokes.
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Hes not a 12yo, get over it. There are some good observations and clever jokes here and there in his movies, but they are outgunned by all the childish dick and fart jokes
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How many times do we need to hear how stupid producer Jon Peters really is and for the record his Superman Lives script was mostly shitty.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 8:48 p.m. CST
Dahveed, I think YOU'RE fucking high, Smith was NEVER in the same league as Fincher, Tarantino, et al.
by Kevin Spellman
It's only because assholes like YOU put his name in the same sentence that people even talk about it. Smith barely has a film school education. He's admitted himself that he doesn't even know his lenses (though I hope since admitting that that he's educated himself a bit). He was never about making visually arresting, cinematic films with amazing performances and enthralling plots. He has ALWAYS made dopey comedies about friendship aimed at psuedo-intelligent, under-achieving slackers, with a whole lot of heart. Stop comparing him to fucking Fincher, you madman.
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He is very limited talent...which is a bit of a over-statement in current Hollywood when whores like the Cassidasians make millions. He should branch out, not in a Smith kinda way, but really branch out; do a real horror film, an action flick; something, anything to spread his wings. Not Smith pretending doing those, but a real DIRECTOR. And don't become the king of camp like Tarantino is now.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 8:58 p.m. CST
The real question is when will AICN do another multi-part, self-pitying/loathing interview with Smith stoned out of his mind?
by reflecto
That was some sad shit.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 9:16 p.m. CST
My two problems with Clerks 2: 1. It replaced the witty dialogue with DVD-Extra-Featuresesque spoofs and gags. 2. It should have been in black and white.
by RedJester
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bitch can only wear hockey goalie jerseys, and even those constrict his tits something fierce...
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Dec. 7, 2012, 9:24 p.m. CST
Kevin Smith is a talkbacker, and he notoriously has a very fragile ego
by Bobo_Vision
Look through this talkback and see if you can spot him.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 10:01 p.m. CST
Plenty of questions... No. Just one. Will it suck? And the answer is Yes.
by happybunni
He should retire, and just find new ways to do his speaking tours which have excellent reviews. There are so many people out there that struck gold with one project, and then keep trying to reach that again when they just can't. It's like that one time I cooked an amazing chicken dish. Do I keep trying to be a cook and failing? Hell no. I just accept that amazing chicken as the anomaly that it was.
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I love Kevin Smith's movies Clerks II is my favorite!! I am a happy godzilla guy!!!
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Just fucking go away already. You've already promised to twice.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 10:13 p.m. CST
If Kevin Smith wasnt a director, he'd be a pretentious clerk at a video rental place
by Bobo_Vision
Which has just gone bankrupt, and he'd be bitching about how he has so much more talent than the existing directors out there. Loud fat guys make a living being loud....from other fat guys who pay to listen to them.
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Of course I know what I am talking about. I watched about half of the fist Clerks movie and stopped because I was bored out of my mind. Bad direction, poor acting, terrible pacing and the worst character motivation made me no longer have any interest in the movie. As for Clerks 2, never saw it so I can't say anything good or bad about it other than the scene with Rosario dancing is freaking awesome. All that said, you do realize my original post was a childish, stupid excuse to bring up Rosario Dawson's awesom bouncing tits. And you gotta be a nerd of epic purportions to read my post and comment on me not seeing the stupid movies and not pick up on the hot chick dancing.
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I'm totally shocked that Smith would abandon a possibly good/new idea in favor of a an older, burnt out idea that will guarantee him money. Shocked.
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My Warcraft addicted lesbian ex never forgave you for stealing Harley Quinn as a daughter's name. So thanks. I got an Ivy outta it. Fragile ego? Please. Meet me at Gaiman's TARDIS, I keep a bong in there. and some chicken wings. Fat bastard.
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Dec. 7, 2012, 10:56 p.m. CST
emperor_was_a_jerk , I'm far from a party pooper :) I'll give you Rosario dancing, that is quite the scene.
by Nichole
You should give the films a second chance. I think they are pretty damn good. I didn't intend to come off as a jerk, I just think you should watch them again. I stand by my creepythinman not liking Day of the Dead comment though. That is inexusable. Fuck him! Sorry, emperor_was_a_jerk. Do you forgive me?
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Are they all like Apoo from the Quickie Mart?
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Yes, they are exactly like Apoo from the Quickie Mart.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 12:07 a.m. CST
I wonder if somebody will casually drop a nerd reference
by mr teaspoon
That's always hilarious, right? They know Lord of the Rings!
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Dec. 8, 2012, 12:21 a.m. CST
He has enough cash to retire. Smith's films are "The Big Chill", "Grand Canyon", etc.
by Pixelsmack
He needs to do a Clerks "40" and "50." It's his legacy marking generation X. There's plenty of humor and plenty of viewers. Don't try and be "hip" making movies people in their 20s want to see. Keep it going. He's built a great legacy we've all grown up with. I go back and watch Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, and so on, with fond memories. Good stuff. I continue to enjoy the evolving and aging adventures of the cast he created.
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I hope dude stays grumpy, keeps talking about retirement and keeps making movies anyway. I dig him, as a personality, and I dig his movies. I'll admit that I was caught off guard at the announcement, production and release of Clerks 2, because there will never be another film like the original. But once he broke through that wall, whatever! Game on. Personally, I'd like to see an update on the Mallrats characters.
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I liked witty dialoge, the pop culture references, the vulgarity, and the metric fucktonne of heart that seems to underly those movies. I didn't dig cop out, but it was a movie he didn't write, and I'm guessing its hard to turn down the opportunity to direct bruce willis (even if you turn out to regret it). I'm a bit bummed that Hit Somebody won't be a movie anymore, but if his last movie is going to be an askew universe movie, i think its a good way to go out. I thought Clerks 2 was pretty good. The one thing I don't get is why even say its the last one. What if you get nostalgic or get the urge to make another flick you kind of pingeon hole yourself. It's like a rock band say they're breaking up. Why not just stop making shit in case you get the urge to do it again. I also don't think any of his movies flopped. He makes low budget movies for a few million, and they make 30 million at the theatre and more on home video. He has his niche, but I think he's really digging the internet radio thing now. I guess it something else to try. God knows I get bored of my job after only a few years.
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Let us not forget that.
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Red State was pretty tight. There's hope for the old boy yet.
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I know, for sure, that I would watch Clerks 3. Give the man room to breathe. I was never fond of Mallrats or Strike Back. Maybe, I need to watch them again, but Clerks and Clerks II, were excellent.
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And them remember when Mallrats was the greatest Clerks sequel and then....wait...what was I talking about... Oh yeah it's 2013 and I have a.d.d. Like everyone else so FUCK KEVIN SMITH AND WATCH @SICKDAYCHICAGO
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Dec. 8, 2012, 5:40 a.m. CST
It's never too late for film school, where he could learn the
by Bedknobs and Boomsticks
technical stuff, and perhaps consider collaborating with a better screenwriter.
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Jay and Silent Bob, now in their 40's, still unemployable and mostly unsuccessful, dream up a scam in which Silent Bob attempts to get fat and lazy enough to sue an Airline for discrimination when they force him to buy 2 tickets due to his massive, seat busting, planet like girth. Hilarity ensues.
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A once-promising filmmaker who burned out after his fourth film (Dogma) and dabbled in reality TV, is stuck putting together a second, unwanted, sequel to his initial hit to avoid complete irrelevancy. Can a stint in rehab and/or a divorce be far behind?
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Better have Benedict Cumberbatch making an appearance. .... Just sayin'!
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Dec. 8, 2012, 10:01 a.m. CST
Alpeter3, CUmberabatch in a Clerks movie would be awesome, too bad it will never happen! Damn!
by notcher
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The thing is people would accept his shortcomings in the early days of his career because he was regular guy makes good and everyone likes to see that. But then instead of coming into his own as a filmmaker he brought the same green bean casserole to the table again and again and people are just sick of what he has to offer. He really doesn't see his career as an arc of any kind like he's not concerned at all with scoring that one film that in the twilight of your years you'd want people to still be watching. He just markets himself and makes a buck showing that he's still the same marginally-talented guy now he was back then in spite of all the experience that would make anyone that actually cared or had talent a better filmmaker.
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But you are wrong in that everyone is sick of Smith, he still has a huge fan following who will go to see his films. Smith was never going to take a step into the Joss Whedon category. He already said he'd never make a comic book movie and "Cop Out" was as close as he'll ever get to an action film, his words. I grew up with Smith's movies and I still think his dialogue is fresh even if he kinda has the same settings for his films, but you know what, that's fine by me. I wish Die Hard would follow the same model.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 10:24 a.m. CST
notcher, you fail the reading and writing comprehension test.
by Bobo_Vision
First, what you wrote above is gibberish. Second, I didn't say Smith was pretentious. I was describing what he would be if he wasn't a director. He's not a clerk working at a video store, either.
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I only have them occasionally, they're never as good as I remember and when I'm done I swear I'll never have any again.
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It's really quite disproportionate. And ugly. And smacks of a kind of self loathing and jealously that is distasteful. The man has directed a mixed bag of films - some extremely funny, others not. It saddens me to find people are now ragging on the original Clerks. It's a small masterpiece in no-money filmmaking and highly entertaining to boot. Again, his word of mouth tours are sold out for a reason - they make people laugh. Whats the big problem here?
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Dec. 8, 2012, 10:39 a.m. CST
melgibsoncalledmethenword, YES, CLERKS 1 & 2 ARE MASTERPIECE'S THE SAME WAY NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD AND DAWN OF THE DEAD ARE!!!FACT!!!
by CreepyThinMan
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HE SAYS YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR LENSES ARH ARH ARH
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Take your meds, have some coffee, and then enroll in a reading comprehension course at Phoenix University.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 10:52 a.m. CST
And notcher, you should pay me a tutoring fee for what I'm about to do....
by Bobo_Vision
...but this one is on the house. notcher: Saying he'd have more talent than anyone else DOESN'T make him pretentious. My God! Definition: Pretentious - Attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed. Phoenix Online University awaits your application, notcher.
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...literally JUST finished it on NETFLIX. Wow. It took him, what? Twenty-some years? But Kevin Smith went and made himself a film. REALLY good. GENUINELY scary in parts. Shows a maturity that he has never shown before and it's a shame he's decided to follow up with another damned CLERKS movie, but whatever. Man needs to make money. Well done, man. What a great movie.
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As another poster noted, Kevin Smith's movies look like fan films that you might find on YouTube. He prides himself on his dialogue, but every one of his characters are indistinguishable. They all speak in the same voice (his) - except when he is dealing in broad caricatures (like Jay). Does anybody in the real world actually sound that "scripted." I think he would be the first person to tell you that he couldn't direct an action sequence for his life. His real talent lies in self-promotion. When he does decide to finally "hang them up," he would make an excellent motivational speaker (as long as it's not for weight-loss products).
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I felt like I'd outgrown KS too, I didn't even check out Zack and Miri, more because of the Rogen Factor, didn't see Cop Out...but a chance cameo of his on a Face Off episode made me remember how much I still like the guy. I just figured Red State would be a horror movie with Star Wars nods, but it sounds like that's not the case at all.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 1:37 p.m. CST
Yes but does he know his lenses now? Else Bruce Willis will punch him!
by Ricardo
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I'd probably watch them all...........
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Dec. 8, 2012, 1:57 p.m. CST
A guy who has it all making films about guys who have nothing.
by SigourneyWeavers3Dbeaver
Kevin, look at your wife, and your Hollywood mansion and ask yourself what you can possibly say about middle aged minimum wage clerks who made nothing of their lives.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 2:33 p.m. CST
If you didn't know it, you would have NO idea Red State is a Kevin Smith film.
by JediRob
It doesn't look or sound like any of his other stuff. It's not the greatest film in the world but it is totally watchable and has some great performances.
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How can anyone having seen that film actually like it? It was one of the worst films I've ever seen and I sat through They Shoot Horses Don't They?
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Dogma was the last good movie Smith made and that was nearly 15 years ago. Not that I am clamoring for a Dogma sequel.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 6:52 p.m. CST
Kevinps, i fucking agree with you dumass!! Do you not know what the word CONTEMPORARY means? Jesus. Next time I'll just say he sucks and leave it at that.
by dahveed1972
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He endured Affleck and Willis, he gets a pass for that. He has a nice resume; solid, thoughtful, memorable comedies with tons of heart and soul. That's not easy to pull off especially in this era of gross-out/filthy comedies. When the Star Wars news it recently, he did a great story about growing up, the neighbor kid he ran with was huge fan and died years later... he dedicated his article to that guy and it was very cool... So smoochie noochie and all that... turn loose of Jason Mewes for a while and he might get some cred. I'm rooting for the guy, just wish he'd lose weight and learn how to dress like an adult.
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Because that's about all the good jobs there will be out there thanks to the President Muslim and his stupid, never- will/has- worked, tax and spend philosophy.
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and no one cares, does it still make a sound?
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Dec. 8, 2012, 8:12 p.m. CST
Is "Hit Somebody" a reference to the Warren Zevon hockey song?
by aramis2112
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As far as I can can see, Affleck is a cool guy and Smith was way out of his league trying to direct Willis.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 8:43 p.m. CST
Ugggh WHY CLERKS 3? WHY NOT JAY AND BOB STRIKE BACK 2?!
by Norman Colson
NOW THAT SHIT WAS FUCKING HILARIOUS!!!!
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If not for Chasing Amy and Dogma (I'd throw in Jersey Girl but since no one went to see it I'll let that one go) would Ben be as big as he is now? Of course, Kevin might have been telling Ben to do Daredevil too, so maybe he doesn't owe him quite as much LOL. I think Kevin was on the right track moving on from the View Askew bunch, but Jersey Girl got screwed by the Bennifer bullshit, then he took pity on Mewes (I distinctly remember Kevin himself saying that he told Jason if he got clean he'd reward him)and did Clerks 2. Zach and Miri is ok, but you knew with the plot (not to mention the title) how it would be taken by critics and most of the public, and Red State, no one including the studio itself (remember they sold Kevin the rights to it for $1) knew for sure what to do with it. Someone above stated that he didn't do Green Hornet because he got afraid of it (I assume this was the aborted Greg Kinnear as Hornet version?) and that saddens me as I thought this would be the logical step for him to take. Unless someone takes a chance on him, I'm afraid Kevin is going to be forever pigeonholed. I enjoy his stuff and would love to have an hour just bs-ing with the guy.
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Daredevil could always use a new writer.
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Asshole, they're friends. It had nothing to do with endurance. Why would he he continue to give Affleck STARRING roles in his movies if he was just "enduring" the guy. Go fuck yourself.
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Seriously.
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Dec. 8, 2012, 11:49 p.m. CST
"never-ending legion of goblins..." [to quote Mr. Beaks]
by Timothy Marcione
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Just saw two TV shows with his name in the credits. So while he is not the greatest filmmaker on the planet-not even a good one by his own admission. He is still working. I have seen most of his films more than once. He did loose me with his Bush bashing in his second concert movie, that shit taints my views of the artist as his opinions are not facts or based on facts. I'll still check out Clerks 3
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I'll give them a second chance. Sometimes for some unknown reasons a movie may just not work for the viewer on the first try. I remember not liking Boogie Nights after I walked out of the theater but now I think it's a masterpiece and is in my top ten! So I'll check out Clerks again. And Clerks 2.
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Dec. 9, 2012, 2:21 a.m. CST
Just because you put a couple of exclamation marks at the end of the sentence...
by Queefer Sutherland
...doesn't make this exciting news. It's horrible. Smith is horrible. Clerks is horrible. This is all so pathetic, Smith is so pathetic. His fans are pathetic. Pathetic pathetic pathetic.
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Dec. 9, 2012, 3:11 a.m. CST
Both of Kevin Smith's Sexiest Scenes Feature The Jackson 5?
by DutchRudder
Salma Hayek in Dogma, "Candy Girl", and Rosario Dawson in Clerks 2, "ABC". Coincidence...? I think not...
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Dec. 9, 2012, 4:15 a.m. CST
Smith's contemporaries are NOT fincher, russell, wes anderson or aronofsky
by Kevin Spellman
the only one you got really got right is linklater. tarantino and pta are kind of contemporaries of kevin's, i guess, along with robert rodriguez. Richard Kelly, David Gordon Green, Edgar Wright, Jody Hill, Judd Apatow. Even though they came a few years later, those guys are more Kevin's contemporaries than the auteurs you listed.
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why can't he make a movie that is intelligent when his persona is that of a douchebag who thinks he is intelligent? Until he can even attempt a higher level of discourse in 1 film, he will always be just a fat guy who made toilet humor/stoner movies.
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It's not funny, it's creepy and just wrong. I skip it every time it shows up in Clerks 2. Yuck.
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Dogma has some excellent salient points on religion. I liked how he bashed it for all of its hypocracies, yet remained faithful and a true man of God. I think Smith got stuck in a rut. He felt safe with those low-budget comedies, because honestly, they required not much work; aim the camera and let bring on the funny. He just needs to test himself with other material. Cop-Out doesn't count nor does Red State, yeesh.
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and Willis seems to be a psychotic asshole.
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Dec. 9, 2012, 11:30 a.m. CST
He could write a new Daredevil movie. His run at the comic was excellent....
by Dan
Smoking weed at 40 is all kinds of pathetic no matter who you are. Its a sign you've given up. Oregon will eventually regret their decision to legalize it. Pot isn't a big bad scary drug, but it does demolish motivation and ambition of any kind.... Way to go, Oregon....you stinking worthless hippies!
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Haha...what a fucking pussy. Of all places....
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I thought it was just Washington and it's legal to USE but illegal still to SELL. So really, it's still illegal - you just dont have to worry about someone narcing on you if they smell you smoking it.
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Dec. 9, 2012, 1:12 p.m. CST
zodlovemaude....so you're a Republican who loves the Star Wars prequels???????
by Bobo_Vision
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you're single.
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Yeah, it's just Washington and Colorado. zod is ill-informed.
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and i dare him to return to these pages and argue that point
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And you voted for Obama? I'm going out on a limb to say you are a Socialist stooge in love with Santa Clause and "Free Shit."
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But of course the Federal laws trump the states so it's pointless to support it. Unless you never leave the state to get high. Medical use, legalize it now...
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everyday without something terrible happening to him/her. I'm not saying it needs to stay illegal, but it is not a battle worth fighting for...if people want to eat smoke and smell bad, have at it. medical use, however...
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Dec. 9, 2012, 5:45 p.m. CST
Another Clerks film, eh? Trying to squeeze blood out of a turnip.
by SunTzu77
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Dec. 9, 2012, 5:47 p.m. CST
Cop Out... Jersey Girl... Zack and Miri Make a Porno... the turd list is IMMENSELY LONG.
by SunTzu77
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I think I may like it better or as much as the first one. It was really about how people like Dante and Randall, who are always looking ahead with no plan, really get the short end of the stick. They are very co-dependent on each other. Their friendship is their greatest fault. They hold each other back but are so right for one another.
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Even at his worst both Cop Out and Jersey Girl were enjoyable, I always thought JG was judged harshly due to the whole Bennifer thing, its actually a really good tribute to John Hughes and those type of 80's style movies. I loved the shit out of Clerks 2, so although I feel it ended those characters arc's, Id be well up to see where they go next.
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If you don't like Smith's films, that's fine. If you don't like his humour, that's fine. But there are people here who talk about him like he is some money-obsessed piece of shit. This guy produces a number of podcasts (most of which are awesome) for his fanbase and charges them nothing for it, he makes a big deal of encouraging young film makers and artists to aspire to achieve their goals, he promotes the hell out of people who have genuine talent and he's a guy who was decent enough to pay for two of his best friends to go to rehab and help them out with their problems. That makes him a good guy in my books.
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Most of the comments I've read on here that are "bashing" Kevin Smith are clearly written by people who have no clue what the guy is like. He's just that fat bloke who directed some films that you personally don't like. I've listened to his podcasts, read his books and seen him do a Q&A or two and as a result I've got a much better perspective on the kind of man he is. And he is genuinely a decent guy with a big heart (and a gut to match) who basically just wants to encourage others to pursue their dreams and knows damn well that he was lucky to end up where he is. I can name plenty of other writers/directors who don't have even half of the perspective on themselves that Kevin Smith has. My apologies if this comes off as a rant, but I really feel the need for people to KNOW about someone before they make derogatory posts about them.
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One more trip to the money well before pseudo-retirement. Wouldn't mind this as his final (for now) film, see how marriage and child raising for Dante went.
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...on this week's Hollywood Babble-On. Just downloaded it and listening now. Basically about the history of Clerks III i.e. what, why and how.
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Speak for yourself. I'm 37 and make seven figures a year, great family, smoke constantly. All it does is make me nicer and less bored.
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That's probably a bit harsh.
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First, I agree with those who argue that Smith is a relic of the mid-90's who has failed to evolve as a filmmaker. What's more, I don't perceive that he has any real desire to at this point. Directing films seems to be the least of his interests right now, what with basic cable TV shows and his traveling one-man show. Honestly, I see no real need for another Clerks film. Clerks II wrapped up Dante & Randall's story arcs pretty nicely. Smith had maybe 10 minutes of material in Clerks II where he had something semi-intelligent to say about the lives of these characters and, more generally, life in your 30's. Unfortunately, you had to sit through the rest of the movie, filled to the brim with gratuitous profanity, debauchery & shock value bestiality, in order to get to the interesting stuff. And the Star Wars vs. LOTR riffing was no different than you could read in any average AICN talkback. I would have no desire to sit through another flick containing donkey sex just to see how these characters are adjusting to their new (old) lives. Dante married his impossibly hot girlfriend, raised his child, they bought the QuikStop and made peace with their station in life. The End.
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So, are you in need of a manservant drive you around, laugh at your jokes, and make guacamole and shit?
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he just likes playing silly beggars with his fans. Did enjoy "Clerks II" - was at times, side-splittingly hilarious; i will never look at a donkey in the same way again. As for "Clerks III": Why not? Although the curtain came down on Randall and Dante's life behind the counter in a proper and sufficent manner. Still, can't be any worse than the serious mishap he made with his fellow Jerseymen, Bruce Willis.
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Dec. 10, 2012, 3:52 p.m. CST
As long as it has another feel-good dance scene in it, how could it miss?
by principalblackman
The Jackson 5, ABC? Kevin Smith didn't even try with part 2. The last scene was good, but the rest was shit.
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Was fan fucking tastic. Sure it had the dick and fart jokes like all his other stuff, but as a dude who went through 12 years of Catholic school, it had some thought provoking stuff. And a tour de force by Affleck. Any above haters on Dogma can suck a nut and go watch some artsy Aronofsky bullshit
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