Ain't It Cool News (



Ambush Bug here. The below hour-plus long conversation took place between myself and my fellow @$$holes Matt Adler, Optimous Douche, and our host Johnny Destructo of as we talked about BEFORE WATCHMEN: RORSCHACH #1, THE WALKING DEAD #101, PATHFINDER #1, SAGA #6, GRIMM FAIRY TALES #76, ADVENTURES OF A COMIC CON GIRL #1, ELEPHANTMEN #42, UNCANNY X-FORCE #29, THE VICTORIES #1, another arousing edition of @$$terpiece Theatre, and of course, more general jack@$$$ery!

Looks for more of the Holes rambling about comics on Poptards, follow us on Facebook here, and in future AICN COMICS columns!

Readers Talkback
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  • Aug. 21, 2012, 10:48 a.m. CST


    by kittenmittens

    Love the podcast. I catch you guys every week. Best hour plus of the day. and FIRST!

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 12:18 p.m. CST

    Love you guys but

    by MainMan2001

    Some of the constant jokey stuff is unbearable. Get to the comics!!! Haha.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 12:52 p.m. CST

    Video suckage...

    by Unscripted

    I'm not quite sure why you've gone to a video format for these reviews... I know the web audience is increasingly lazy and illiterate but if you're going to be discussing complex written/illustrated material we really don't need you to slowly read things to us, like Uncle Don reading toddlers the Sunday funnies. I HATE having to wait/wade through a video when I can just read the material at my own pace, usually a hell of a lot faster. It's also a lot more contained and private not to have to have audio up for such things. Forcing yourselves to write it keeps down the pointless time wasting and clownage as well. But I'm wasting electrons, I know. It's just so much EEEEZZZZEEEEer to record your babble and move on.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 1:27 p.m. CST


    by Michael

    Absolutely spot on comments. I loathe the trend toward making every news item/review into a video...and the seemingly irresistible temptation to 'yuk it up' during the process.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 1:44 p.m. CST

    ummm you guys know it's not VIDEO right?

    by Poptard_JD

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 1:52 p.m. CST

    As for "easier to record our babble" :...

    by Poptard_JD

    It takes me 20-30 min to write a review. It takes me up to 4 hrs to edit and post our babble. And that's not including the almost 2 hours + of recording the babble.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 1:55 p.m. CST

    Then there you go...

    by Unscripted

    Don't waste 10 times as much time to produce an inferior product. Write your reviews.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 1:57 p.m. CST

    You Guys Know We Still Do Written Reviews on Wednesdays - Right?

    by optimous_douche

    If you don't like the podcast we are here every Wednesday with the written word. Simply think of this as the bonus material for the illiterate.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 2:07 p.m. CST

    Oh but genuine thanks to KittenMittens!!!

    by Poptard_JD

    Way to post something positive on the Internet! Bravo!! It's the positive comments and feedback that make it worthwhile!

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 2:54 p.m. CST

    A negative comment in the talkbacks, how original...

    by Ambush Bug

    Don't listen to the twat, JD. If this were wednesdays written reviews column, unscripted would menstrate about having to read the reviews. I love it how someone new to the site comes in and immediately starts griping before knowing what the fuck he's talking about. As I said in a previous post, unscripted. The podcasts are being meticulously transcribed by a room full of monkeys. Please hold your breath until they are posted. Fucktard.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 4:21 p.m. CST

    You gotta love...

    by MattAdler

    ...when someone takes the time to rant about the format... and doesn't even have a clue what the format is. Yeah, that'll make us take your comments seriously.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 4:55 p.m. CST

    yeah, so , anyway.....

    by sonnyhooper

    ....lets talk some comics. i'll get the ball rolling with a few topics of discussion. <p> 1. Before Watchmen is a plague upon humanity that has no reason to exist. and to judge each mini series on it's own merits is a waste of time because Alan Moore says so and all other comic book writers can suck a big pile of dicks. <p> 2. Walking dead is either totally awesome or annoying the hell out of it's fans, which ever way the wind is blowing on that.... <p> aaaand last but not least <p> 3. The Avengers is the awesome and Dark Knight Rises is a pile of shit and suggesting that the two films are actually apples and oranges is a fools errand. liking both movies for what they are and not what you wanted one or the other to be is stupid and so are you for not taking sides in this lame ass coke vs. pepsi debate. <p> that about covers it right? <p> BTW, i'm joking. trying to lighten the mood here guys. also........ i'm mooning all of you.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 5:48 p.m. CST

    Constructive criticism is welcome,

    by Poptard_JD

    However, saying we are wasting our time by doing it at all is just being rude for rude's sake, something u are clearly into. The audio show is posted on Tuesdays and the written reviews are posted on Wednesdays, done and done. I appreciate ur gently worded suggestion though. Do u write into other entertainment venues and say "Hey HBO, u are stupid dummy dumbs because you aren't playing everything on the same night because it's more convenient to ME."? Well, I don't want to make assumptions, but I certainly hope not. Ps. Next time you request an intelligent response, take a second to first consider ur hypocrisy, darling.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 5:49 p.m. CST


    by MattAdler

    Another genius who finds it too confusing to not click on a link titled "podcast" when he doesn't want to listen to audio? Amazing. Nobody is making anybody wait for anything, Einstein. The written reviews have always been posted on Wednesday, and will continue to be. There is no conceivable logical reason why someone who hates podcasts would argue that they be included WITH something they do like..."I HATE this! Please include it with my favorite things!" In reality, this is just a whine amounting to "Waaaaah! Not everything inthe world is made with me in mind! I can't stand not being the center of the universe!" Oh well. Eventually you'll get over it and find something else to complain about.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 5:53 p.m. CST


    by Poptard_JD

    1. Why didn't you tell me all of this earlier! I've been wasting my time! Seriously though, I think I've only read like 3 Alan Moore stories that I really enjoyed and that's me being generous because I can only think of two right now but I'm assuming I'm forgetting at least one! 2. I was getting bored of walking dead but with issue 100 I'm back on board! 3. I don't watch any comic book movies because they are for babies. Baby movies based on BabyBooks!!

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 5:55 p.m. CST

    What was everyone's favorite book of last week?

    by Poptard_JD

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 7:33 p.m. CST

    as the owner of the Laugh Factory said to Michael Richards...

    by sonnyhooper

    ....."I think you lost the crowd."

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 8:05 p.m. CST

    Haha! I was trying to lose...

    by Poptard_JD

    The jerk crowd and engage a better crowd! Oh wells...

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 9:43 p.m. CST

    Here's the thing, dandy...

    by Ambush Bug

    I believe you just simply don't understand. I think you are under the assumption that we post a podcast on Tuesday and then post the transcription of that podcast on Wednesdays. We don't do that. Just as Harry and his crew post multiple reviews of the same film because THEY ARE DIFFERENT PEOPLE, the Poptards Podcast is a different set of reviews from the written reviews that have been posting here on AICN for over a decade. We review books on the podcast. I guess what we are failing to understand is that if you don't like podcasts, and see that the headline reads PODCAST in big letters, don't listen. But don't worry, there are written reviews (different written reviews) that will be posted as usual on Wednesday. The problem here is that internet cliches are at work in this talkback, which means folks who have no interest in something feel the need to spout negativity about it without really understanding the subject matter discussed because, well, they can. But that doesn't mean they are right. Don't be that guy, dandy. Don't be the guy who busts in the room and announces everything's suckatude and only griping about what this thing isn't. This isn't written reviews. It also isn't a turkey sandwich. The reviews in written form are on Wednesdays. Turkey sandwiches come the days after thanksgiving. While turkey sandwiches are a part of the same food group as turkey, it is a different meal, prepared in a different way. So in the same fashion, consider SPOILER ALERT! POPTARDS PODCAST (the name of the article you clicked, by the way) a separate entity from AICN COMICS REVIEWS. One happens Tuesday with original material. The other happens Wednesday with original material. One is for ear holes. The other for eye holes. Now, we are @$$holes and are proud to be them, so if you kick in the door screaming, YOU GUYS SHOULD DO THIS! PODCASTS SUCK! Expect an @$$Holish response. If you come in wanting to talk about comics, even if you don't like the podcast, we'll still talk pleasantly with you, but if you barge in rudely, then expect to be responded to in kind. And, dandy, understand what you're talking about first before spouting off. It helps your argument immensely. I'm going to go eat a turkey sandwich now while you try to wrap your brain around the concept of different posts different content.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 9:49 p.m. CST

    as for the "valid points" of unscripted...

    by Poptard_JD

    His valid points were that he doesn't like podcasts. He'd rather read the reviews. Sure that is a valid point, but the only answers to that are 1. We stop doing something we love because one person would rather read (which he can do on Wednesdays, when the completely separate, written reviews are posted) 2. He doesn't listen to the show. So when people show up saying they don't want to listen to the show, I have no other response then...DON'T LISTEN TO THE SHOW, lol!

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 9:52 p.m. CST

    So hey....COMICS! Huh? EH? Who LOVES'em!?

    by Poptard_JD

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 10:15 p.m. CST


    by MattAdler

    Every one of us does this because we enjoy it, not out of any need to please some random guy screaming on the Internet. So the idea that we owe you something is laughable. Particularly because you don't even listen to the show, so what does your opinion matter anyway? And once again, there is zero logic in someone wanting something they hate to be put together with something they like. It makes no sense whatsoever. So let me put this another way--even if we suddenly decided, "Hey, this dude's online tantrum makes a ton of sense, let's just stop doing the podcast"-- you would not get the written reviews a day earlier. They would still come in on Wednesday, because that is the schedule that works for the people writing the reviews. Get it? No, of course you don't.

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 10:33 p.m. CST

    Podcast issue

    by KCViking

    I cannot get the video to stop. Please update your software to please me. Thanks. Douche- please quit stalking me. I was on vacation...multiple listeners don't need that info though. :)

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 11:19 p.m. CST


    by Homer Sexual

    I don't listen to the podcast I just click to see if the posts afterwards are interesting. This week they are.... Not

  • Aug. 21, 2012, 11:35 p.m. CST

    Sorry Homer...anything u wanna discuss?

    by Poptard_JD

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 12:59 a.m. CST

    *I* wait for the podcast.....

    by 3774

    ...What else am I gonna listen to when doing my hair? And I'm a person, instead of no one,'re wrong there. Repeated use of the word video is like watching a troll herp derp his way into the room, and then watching his mouth trip and fall down the stairs. Then get up and start screaming at the stairs. It'd be funny if it weren't so annoyingly loud. But that's how hate-filled, attention-starved little children roll. There's criticism addressing legitimate concerns, and then there's bitching born from a staggering sense of personal entitlement (IE: no need to be nice, no need to be intelligent). The former is born from a sincerity in wanting something to succeed. The latter is born from breath-taking ego-centric demands for self-gratification. Cost of listening to this podcast: zero. Cost of using 'retarded', 'head up ass', 'fucktards', 'dumb fucks', etc...and then demanding an 'intelligent reply'? Priceless. Deciding to not listen to something is one thing. But going on an insult-laced tirade over something simply existing that doesn't cator to you specifically? Wow. If Optimus proclaiming his penchant for having sex with Japanese t-girls gets you that angry, write your Congressperson. Maybe they'll enact a law.

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 10:28 a.m. CST


    by MattAdler

    What you continue not to get (deliberately, I think) is that the audio is not "in place"of anything written, since we offer written reviews too. So really, your complaint just boils down to "Don't do this because I'm not interested in it." But you are not the center of the universe, and there are other people who do enjoy listening, sometimes even more than reading. You're just going to have to get used to the fact that not everything is made for you.

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 10:39 a.m. CST

    Hee. You're so cute.

    by Poptard_JD

    Try paying attention, cutie pie. As was said earlier: This show isn't instead of the written piece, it's something extra. So no...u not liking to listen to podcasts isn't a constructive anything, it's simply ur preference. So if u don't like listening tO the show...DON'T. And did I ask for praise? Nerp. I'd be just as happy with u knowing what ur talking about and making constructive comments, there, sassy pants.

  • It's incredibly simple if you don't like something don't LISTEN! I'd rather have my balls put in a vice than sit through a Jennifer Anniston movie. Therefore I don't go see a Jennifer Anniston movie. I don't go watch the said movie knowing I'm going to hate it, than bitch about how much I hate it. That's RETARDED! I love the Podcast for some reason I'm not able to listen to this one. But just seeing someone bitch about something that they clearly don't like. When no one is putting a gun to your head to listen is just beyond stupid. Keep up the Great WORK @$$holes. I'll continue to laugh & listen when I can.

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 12:11 p.m. CST


    by MattAdler

    I use it as a compliment. All the time.

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 12:14 p.m. CST

    Thanks for the support guys and gal!! Much appreciated :) ps: WC...

    by Poptard_JD

    Have u subscribed to the show through iTunes and still can't listen to this eppy?

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 12:14 p.m. CST


    by MattAdler

    I don't know if there's a technical problem with the post this week (I'm able to hear it), but if you can't access it from the AICN page, JD always posts the podcast on his site as well. Here's the link to this week's edition:

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 12:15 p.m. CST

    There have been some bugs with the hosting server this week.

    by Ambush Bug

    I hope it'll all be worked out by next week, wcwlkr.

  • :)

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Thanks for letting me know Matt I jumped over to

    by Wcwlkr

    As usual you guys had me cracking up. I just didn't have a book I wanted you guys to review. But I'll definitely hit you guys up this week. Just subscribed to the Podcast.

  • Aug. 22, 2012, 2:48 p.m. CST

    This talkback is funny. Ambush, I applaud you for not banning unscripted.

    by SergeantStedenko

    You guys are all class in my funny book.

  • ...I've never been AGAINST the podcast. There's room for both and people should have the freedom to enjoy creating and observing (i.e., listening, viewing or reading) in whatever manner they chose. <p> That being said, it kind of bums me out when I see pictures up above of four books I would love to see written opinions about and/or discuss with other talkbackers. Unfortunately, they appear to have just been part of the podcast this week. (sad face goes here)

  • Aug. 23, 2012, 8:02 a.m. CST

    oh hey look! a ligitimate response, lol

    by Poptard_JD

    Hey Jaka the way the books are chosen goes like this: after we (on the podcast) finish an episode, we take a look at what's coming out the following week, and all agree what we'll read ahead of time in prep for the show. It's pretty random sometimes. "what do we feel like reading, what haven't we read in awhile, what looks interesting." As for the written column, we all share an email thread every week, where all of the @$$holes will "call dibs" on what they want to review as the week goes by, so that there aren't any double reviews (mostly). There really isn't any correlation between the two processes. Out of curiosity, what books did you want to see written reviews of?

  • Aug. 23, 2012, 5:17 p.m. CST

    Would have liked...

    by Jaka

    Rorschach - But all the Before Watchmen books are getting discussed in pretty much every column, so no big deal there. <p> Saga - My favorite book at the moment, by far. And with two skip months upcoming it would have been cool to have a place discuss it. I realize I can go ahead and say whatever I want, but without knowing what was said in the podcast that seems a bit silly. <p> The Adventures of a Comic-Con Girl - Because I almost bought it... but didn't. <p> Pathfinder - I play(d) the game quite a bit, so some idea what the book is about would have been cool. I'm sure I'll check it out in my LCS, though. <p> Whatever is next to Pathfinder looks cool, too, but I don't know what it is.

  • Aug. 23, 2012, 8:05 p.m. CST

    JD is lying about how they choose comics.

    by 3774

    They play a weird game called 'limp the gimp' over video conference, which is as horrifying as it is X-rated. I don't even want to describe what goes on. I was there once. I saw the whole thing.

  • Aug. 24, 2012, 10:07 a.m. CST


    by MattAdler

    I respect your choice not to listen to the podcast, but I do think you're missing out, particularly when it comes to those books you mentioned... we could all do our own written reviews, but there's an interactivity, where we bounce our opinions off each other and react to them, that's missing from written reviews. It's like a group of friends sitting together and debating about comics in a sometimes nerdy, sometimes intense, and often goofy way. We could do written roundtables of course, but those lack a lot of the spontaneity and tone of the live discussions. That said, I have been thinking about summarizing some of my podcast thoughts in written reviews (Douche does it eloquently every week), but for me it's just a question of finding the time.

  • Aug. 24, 2012, 11:51 a.m. CST

    a summary for Jaka

    by Poptard_JD

    Rorschach - I think we mostly liked it (except for Matt, natch). I thought it was a little light on story, but the art was amazing, and I'm excited for the next issue to see where it goes. Azzarello does a great job writing him, I think. Saga - We are all in complete agreement in loving each issue. I didn't know it was going on a break though! Glarrrgh. Adventures of a Comic Con Girl: Good God, no. Don't bother. Pathfinder: Was awesome and Matt actually gives us some really interesting history on it and D&D. The other book is Elephantmen, which Douche liked so much he immediately bought the first TP to start from the beginning, but I was bored.

  • Aug. 24, 2012, 11:51 a.m. CST

    @Pink: I finally read Avenging Spider-Man 9 and 10

    by Poptard_JD

    and LOVED them! I want more Spidey/Cap Marvel team-ups! I wish her solo book was as interesting!

  • Aug. 24, 2012, 12:04 p.m. CST

    The fun of...

    by MattAdler

    ...listening to our Before Watchmen debates is getting to hear me play the literary snob, while everyone else says "Come on! We're getting more of these characters! Just enjoy it!" And when I give my history lessons (like with Pathfinder) you get to see whether I can walk the line of giving enough background without putting everyone to sleep (just kidding, JD would fix it in the editing if I did).