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Stallone! Schwarzenegger! THE TOMB!
Nordling here.
As a child of the 1980s, I don't think I'll ever get used to seeing Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger share the screen together. When I was a teenager, I remember imagining all sorts of film scenarios that would bring these two together. Opening myself for embarrassment here, but I remember having an idea for a World War II movie where Stallone was an Army sergeant in the European theater after D-Day and Schwarzenegger was a German officer in the same area, and the two were racing against time and against each other to capture alien artifacts that somehow landed in France that would turn the tide of the war. Yeah, my mind works like that.
Anyway, I love that these two are in THE TOMB, which sounds a bit TANGO AND CASH, a bit LOCK UP - Stallone plays a man wrongly convicted of a crime who is thrown into a prison that he designed to be escape-proof. Schwarzenegger plays a prisoner there who helps the other prisoners keep their sanity in this brutal environment, while Jim Caviezel is the vicious warden over them both. We all know Caviezel can take a beating but with Vinnie Jones as his sidekick/guard, will we see a three-way fight between Jones, Schwarzenegger, and Stallone? Okay, I'm hyped for THE TOMB now, even though Mikael Håfström doesn't have the best track record.
Alright, enough jibber-jabber. Here's this first look at THE TOMB, courtesy of the Wall Street Journal:
THE TOMB also stars Vincent D'Onofrio, 50 Cent, Sam Neill, and Amy Ryan. THE TOMB opens next year.
Readers Talkback
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Well no shit is the new first...
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It's a good look for him
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The hair? The Skin? Blood transfusions from teenage virgins?
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STALLONE: 'Ey, I 'on' know much about this movie, all's I know is there's some kinda this tomb or somethin', I 'on' know, like a prison. And I gotta get outta there. SCHWARZENEGGER: The Tomb? Hey craft service girl! If you do not give me a blow job it will be you who is going to a tomb! Ha ha! Hey, hey, don't print that, I do not want to get in trouble!
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Stallone wears a wig and has had multiple cosmetic surgeries Arnold has had a hair transplant
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Aug. 13, 2012, 12:14 p.m. CST
Hate to bring it up, but: Stallone plays a(n old) man wrongly convicted of a crime who is thrown into a prison that he designed to be escape-proof. Schwarzenegger plays a(n old) prisoner
by Mickster_Island
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you want him to rub it all over you, don't you?
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Aug. 13, 2012, 12:20 p.m. CST
I'LL ADMIT IT. IT WIGGLED A LITTLE. ACTUALLY LOOKING TOWARDS THIS MORE THAN EXPENDABLES 2. HATE THE LOOKS THEY GAVE SLY AND ARNOLD IN EXPENDABLES.
by Darth Busey
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Right up to "50 Cent"
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Any evidence for this? Other than a general view that "men in their 60s don't have a full, thick, head of hair" I mean? Because I while I agree with the sentiment it's the first I'm hearing of this allegation. Ditto Arnies hair transplant.
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Nordling, that's an awesome idea for a movie! I'd definitely pay to see that. Except, instead of an alien artifact, maybe it would be some kind of ancient religious artifact or a long lost weapon from an ancient culture, ala Raiders of the Lost Ark. You should write the screenplay for that. I'll even chip in a few ideas if you want. If it sells, I'd just ask for a small return, maybe 1-3% - and my name on the thing, of course. : )
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Gus and Stefan are life long oldtimers, who are at odds with another when a sweet new inmate, Easy Johnson (Morgan Freeman), comes into their lives.
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Yes, great concept (although whether it would have been executed well is another question). Although I think Arnie should concentrate on getting With Wings As Eagles funded at this stage.
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That was my mid 90's dream after watching rambo and Commando then playing for hours trying to kill some wierd looking aliens. I dont think its too late. The story would start off both being on opposite sides of the World. Both being soldiers/Agents with so much knowledge of undercover assasinations, and Political conspiracies and specialize in War. When everything else fails. Both are tracked by the Government for 1 final assignment with the world at stake. Both would die at the end.
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nope
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Aug. 13, 2012, 12:36 p.m. CST
Stallone actually looks like Stallone in that picture
by Samuel Fulmer
Not I don't know, botoxed looking, or heavily made up, or whatever weird streatching that's been going on. Dudes face always looked droopy, but in recent years it's looked really pulled up tight.
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Lock-Up, Tango and Cash, Cliffhanger, The Specialist, Demolition Man, Copland, all preaty solid films. Sure there was Stop or My Mom Will Shoot, Rocky V, various other shit, but in retrospect he put out some good entertainment during that time.
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this movie will be like getting invited to taco bell in the future
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Was able to track it down locally without paying crazy ass Amazon out of print prices, but if you want it on blu ray, you better hunt it down now.
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Was Sandra Bullock's skinny ass
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I dig it.
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First post, that is. Like, ever. What took me. I never even heard of this movie, but what the hell. These are smart guys, Stallone and Schwarzenegger, if they decided to get together with substantial screen time on something, likely has some merit to it. Looks better than Expendables 2.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 12:46 p.m. CST
Jim Caviezel! Stallone, schwartzenegger, vinnie jones.
by Norman Colson
impressive ass line up. but why 50 cent? in this case the black guy deserves to die first! lol..... He cant act for shit.
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As one who freaking LOVED Tango & Cash, as well as Running Man, and a slew of Stallone & Schwarzenegger action movies! Like the Expendables 2 I'm looking forward to this. HURRY UP with a Trailer!
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They both look the way I remember them looking, not the way they look in the Expendables films. I am super looking forward to Expendables 2, but in the ads Stallones face is all puffy, and Arnold looks really old. In this photo they look awesome.
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It sucks that Ah-nuld and Sly waited so long to do some team up action movies, but it's better late than never, I suppose.
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...completely fuck it up and rewrite it into the ground by 10 people (as what most often happens), be prepared for internet critics et al. to blame you for it and drag your name through the mud.
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U know what i noticed most of arnie's movies, he never has a beard of any kind? WTF? I dig the goatee, he looks like a badass... Also Sandra bullock. damn she was so damn hot but cute in that movie. i mean her character had this cute personality, like guilible but innocent but so damn hot at the same time. Nice ass too... Fucking jesse james is an idiot. you left her for who with herpes? lol.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 1:03 p.m. CST
They look great. Even more than Expendables, this may be the real 80s throwback.
by kevred
In all the best ways. How many fun films like this get made anymore, especially with top-tier talent? I remember a time when films like this were just pouring out of Hollywood - original, straightforward stories, not remakes, with no expectations of anything other than a solid good time, and super-charismatic talent and writers that were obviously having fun with what they were doing. Hope they can present this with the same type of vibe, as opposed to the dour, desaturated nu-metal edge of Expendables 2 (which is the only thing about it that doesn't appeal to me). It makes so much of Hollywood's leading-man output of today look uptight and timid in comparison.
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...maybe some flashbacking to the '80's Contra missions, out of retirement, and taking their show to Africa to break up some dictatorship under the radar, or the like. Not unlike every Arnold/Stallone idea thrown around these days, but nostalgically connected to iconography that originally tipped it's hat to the kind of films these guys specialized in. They just need some really talented people behind the cameras for at least one of these projects. Someone who can bring some revisionist, 'Unforgiven,' or even 'Shoot 'Em Up'-like elements to their legacy, without sacrificing what made them fun in the first place. Tall order. I always dreamed of QT getting a hold of Arnold, but after canning his original Inglorious Basterds idea, that's probably the kind of backtracking we shouldn't expect from Tarantino.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 1:06 p.m. CST
Yeah, Arnold does look great with the goatee! Now please add a beard and do King Conan, please!
by kevred
Either way, glad to have Arnold back in filmmaking. He makes Hollywood better.
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Seriously, those two look damn fine for their ages, DAMN fine. Love me some 80'sesque action movie. Glad Arnold is BAWK!!! BRING IT!!!
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Does anyone born in the last 22 years give a rat's ass about these two pensioners? Weighing in, at a combined weight of 131 years, are the heavily mascara-ed and powdered champions of the naff 80s Homoerotic Action Movie. Is it just me? Seriously, I just don't get it. Who pays to see these atrocious actors (and they are, save Sly in 'Copland', atrocious) churn out turgid dialogue whilst using painfully obvious stunt doubles (I'm looking at you, Jim Cameron and 'True Lies', you know the scene, when Ahnuld is, though clearly isn't, running through the snow to escape). Why would you part with your hard-earned tango-and to watch (what will be) drivel played out by two men who really don't need the work (it's only their vanity that does)? Why not support a real movie, with real actors in these financially decrepid times? Oh fuck it all. I don't know why I care but when you see other humans being fed eyeball shit by turds that refuse to be flushed, it just winds me up. Come on, Sly! You called your self expendables, fer chrissakes, doesn't that mean anything to you? Look beyond the military jargon and see the sickening irony!
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Aug. 13, 2012, 1:15 p.m. CST
And yes, they both look world's better in the age-suitable make-up and hair, than the spray-on-tan & dye jobs everyone sports in The Expendables films...
by ThulsaBoom
...we like our heroes crusty, and grizzled. I just hope the rest of, 'The Tomb,' holds up.
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Dude, Stallone is bringing back the 80's, who the fuck doesn't want to see that?!!!!!!!!
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not exactly breaking news
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I really liked the beard on Arnie in The Running Man, I thought it was a shame he only had it during the prison break.
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that cliche is more of a joke than a fact.
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the original "Top Dogs" buddy flick--City Heat.
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Why nobody ever jumped on the idea to make a Wolfenstein movie with Arnold positively baffles me. Yeah, video movies typically suck all sorts of ass, but Wolfenstein is enough of a blank slate - Nazis delving into the paranormal, looking for the ultimate power that'll let Hitler rule the world - that someone could do the base premise justice, or at least write a script that'd be interesting enough to hang 2 hours of glorious ass-kicking action and gleeful carnage fun on. It'd be a bit like Indiana Jones meets Commando. I'd plunk down 10 bucks for that shit.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 1:37 p.m. CST
@judenw Newsflash, all the action movies ever made are HOMOEROTIC in one way or another. Look at the posters... man holding a big GUN and loving it.
by TheKiller7
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Lionsgate's Blu-ray distribution deals with Republic Pictures and Paramount concluded in recent months, so stuff like The Running Man, The Monster Squad, and Cujo from Republic and My Bloody Valentine ('81) and The Relic from Paramount are all out-of-print on Blu-ray. If you don't own them and can find them cheap used do so now.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 1:47 p.m. CST
Err.. aren't, like, all prisons designed to be escape-proof?
by BenBraddock
Isn't that kind of the point?
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Gotta agree with ya there. Slightly perturbed with regards to the uniforms though. Far too squeaky clean for my liking.
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...someone get them some warm milk and a cookie.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 2:07 p.m. CST
Arnie's looking pretty good there, has he been hitting the iron again
by KillaKane
This could be fun, two of the toughest Gipper's on the cell block...
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Hahahaha, that's messed up...
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Too busy lifting weights in the yard, man.
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It's like Shawnshank Redenption... in <echo> SPACE-ACE-ace-ace..ace....ace...
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Aug. 13, 2012, 2:25 p.m. CST
Heey! What happened to that film in which gravity was reversed?
by Ricardo
Are they still actually producing that?
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she's not that busy
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Aug. 13, 2012, 3:05 p.m. CST
RE: "but why 50 cent? in this case the black guy deserves to die first! lol..... He cant act for shit."
by Stalkeye
LMMFAO
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Aug. 13, 2012, 3:09 p.m. CST
That is a great High concept premise Nordling. Somebody need to make this idea so, dammit!
by Stalkeye
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Aug. 13, 2012, 3:32 p.m. CST
For real...there is no reason John Matrix and John Rambo couldn't exist in the same movie together! Make it so, Number One!!!
by Dogmatic
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Aug. 13, 2012, 3:36 p.m. CST
SPOILER: at the end when they escape they realize they were dead the whole time!
by Arafel
OMG, I can't believe that is the ending! Stallone and Schwarzenegger escape THE TOMB, but at the end they find out they really were in a tomb the whole time! Wow, what a total mind fuck! Incredible! I hope I didn't ruin it for anyone. I mean, I sort of did I guess, but no one fucking forced you to to go here so its your fucking fault not mine...
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Aug. 13, 2012, 3:38 p.m. CST
@wavingflagsinspace - please tell us what you enjoy. Not what you think is history's greatest cinema, but what you enjoy.
by kevred
Can it stand up to the scrutiny you're giving? Probably not, and that doesn't affect your enjoyment of it, does it? Besides, pretty much everything in our culture since 1990 is awful.
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More of a joke than a cliche? These two actors are both - laughable and worn out. Held together by surgeons, steroids and a serious dollop of hubris... It stopped being anything more than a money-making exercise for men like this years ago...since the 80s/early 90s their films have been fainter and fainter echoes of long-past glories (glories with lashings of oiled muscles and intense looks at other chaps with oiled muscles, whilst waving their rifle/cigar/stun guns around. Their vanity taints their achievements. Not that they give a shit, of course...
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Kevred, I enjoyed it - and I mean 80s Action Cinema - at the time, in the way young kids tend to enjoy stuff that is loud, easy to understand, slightly naughty because of the violence and nudity. But by deliberately exploiting their ever-more-distant success, and mining what was, at best, derivative in the first place, these 'artists' sully their legacy, in a way. And they do it so shamelessly, too. So part of what irks me is that these guys are still peddling their shtick, ingloriously, to ever-dwindling audiences. To even get a movie greenlit they now have to get into bed with each other (metaphorically speaking). And when this shit gets given the go ahead, it comes at the price of, in some cases, other work. What do I enjoy? Movie-wise I would say the most 'entertaining' (buzz beforehand, crowds in the foyer chattering and expectant, cheers at lights down, cheers at certain lines or actions, cheers & applause at finale - these two films define the multiplex experience for me this year) films I have seen in 2012 at the cinema have been: The Avengers, The Dark Knight Rises, the most interesting (anticipation beforehand, breathlessness during and long conversations afterwards in the pub): Martha Marcy May Malene, Shame and Even the Rain. The most entertaining thing on TV? Mo Farah winning 5000 & 10000 metres gold! Amazing.
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I'm just glad to have Arnie back where he belongs instead of running California into the ground.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:32 p.m. CST
Arnie needs to play a grizzled lumberjack at some point in his life
by D.Vader
BRAWNY: THE TRUE STORY
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...but the real kick in the teeth is this: Who are these films aimed at? If it is their fanbase from the 80s/90s then this sort of hack work is unforgivable in its rehashed laziness. If it is younger audiences, why condescend to them with such lazy and outmoded dreck. Or do they simply put stuff out on name alone, tapping and re-tapping into a vein that has almost collapsed due to being punctured by so many pricks. It's like watching sports pros who play one season too many...it's a crying shame to place their glories in the light of their overreaching addiction to the limelight and/or pay-cheque. Discretion is always the better part of valour.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:35 p.m. CST
hell yeah I'd love to see them in a WWII movie...Arnold NEEDS to speak his native language in at least ONE film
by wcolbert
I have a feeling that he would be much more convincing as an actor if we weren't so distracted by his iconic mispronunciations of the English language. Don't get me wrong, I love Arnold, I just really want to see him playing an Austrian or German IN WWII Germany, not speaking English at all - a real character piece for him, for once, instead of just another action flick. I know he can do it. I saw hints of something greater in him in a few of his performances - even his struggle against his programming in T-3 belies someone who CAN do better. Oh, he'd never be winning any Oscars - I'm not saying that - I just think he could play a real ROLE, not a walking repository for one-liners with a gun. He's reached that stage in his career where him being the strongest in the room full of bad-asses is no longer believable, and he's matured enough as an actor to actually pull of a real human character, with the proper direction of course. Own the older years - they just make you look more grizzled, more of a veteran - they don't make you look feeble or ancient if you do it right. I STILL wouldnt want to fight Arnold, even though he's got some 40 years on me. That jaw looks like it can still take some punishment. He's a big guy even in bone structure.
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The Oakinator needs to say this at some point in this film. And a minimum of twenty "Eyaauuh"s
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:40 p.m. CST
You do realize that your brain works like Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull
by CherryValance
Just sayin'. :) I have a question about the photo. Do prisoners usually have such snazzy outfits? @wavingflagsinspace It's odd that you say that because I don't give a shit about anyone born in the last 22 years. I guess life just works itself out like that. :D
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:41 p.m. CST
and people commenting on how "old" they are...are proof that children under 21 or so shouldnt be allowed to post
by wcolbert
Infants. Grow up. What, you think you just curl up and die in your 60's? Well, maybe you will, because you subsist on cheeseburgers and internet porn, but not people who take care of themselves and have good genes. I know of plenty of "old" people in their 60's who can kick the living crap out of you and everyone in your family. So what's the point in talking about how many times they've been around the sun? Age is relative. Being 65 for one man is an ENTIRELY different thing from being 65 for another. COmpare the average 65 year old American fatass to the average 75 year old Japanese or Chinese man - I guarantee you 9 times out of 10 the Easterner is going to be in better shape at 75 than a man at 65 would be in America. Why? Because people here are soft and spoiled and fat, don't walk anywhere, don't exercise, don't stay active, and just waste away and die. Lay off the whole concept of age. It means NOTHING. You'll get there, too....and you'll look a hell of a lot worse than these two when you get there. Guarantee it.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:43 p.m. CST
So tired of this idiotic youth-obsessed culture we live in. Nothing special about being young. It just makes you weak and inexperienced.
by wcolbert
And I'm only in my 20's, by the way - even I can recognize that.
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These two don't look like Arnold Scwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone - significant amounts of plastic surgery have seen to that. And there is something very special about being young - even GBShaw felt it was too special to be wasted on the young, BUT there's something very embarrassing and painful about pensioners pretending to be that which they are not due to nips'n'tucks at the surgeons, stunt doubles and long breaks between takes. Or it can be hilariously funny if its ironic. These two aren't being ironic.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:51 p.m. CST
Stallone FTW. Can still take his shirt off and look like dy-no-mite!
by UltraTron
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:53 p.m. CST
Arnold can still take his shirt off too. It's just that he looks like a burlap sack filled with dried donkey cocks when he does.
by UltraTron
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:55 p.m. CST
Jah! I kno wut chew meen dere! Ah loohk liike duh burhlahp sahk fill wit de dry dohkhee penis dere
by UltraTron
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Aug. 13, 2012, 4:58 p.m. CST
Iz jush liike I vuz sayink de utta dey. Choo goht tew moohvit moohvit moohvit!
by UltraTron
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Aug. 13, 2012, 5:04 p.m. CST
Arnold has a good reason why he isn't as ripped as Stallone now....he's had open heart surgery, has heart issues in the family, and...doesn't use HGH far as I know
by wcolbert
Give the guy a break. He has had to be more careful about his workouts since his 40's when ( I believe) he had his first surgery. It's actually impressive that he was in as good of shape as he was by the late 90's/early 2000's, that considered. And for the record...there's nothing wrong with HGH. It's not a steroid. People need to understand that. Is it cheating nature a bit by taking your hormone levels back to what they were when you were in your 30's? Sure. But so the hell what? I'd take it too if I were 65. Other medical advances have enabled us as a species to live longer and stay in better shape longer - if we are ever to live to 150 or 200 as a species, we're going to HAVE to cheat nature. We've BEEN doing it for a long time now. In fact...in 30 or 40 years, I'd be surprised if I weren't taking at least small amounts of the stuff. Why should I not want to have the energy levels I used to when I'm 60+? The plain fact of the matter is, most people mocking Sly for getting some touch-ups would, if they had the money and were older, do the exact same thing. Why NOT, is the question. We have the technology to live longer and stay younger. And for the record...just because a guy is in his 60's does NOT mean he's dying his hair. Men in my family routinely keep their hair color into their 90's. Been that way for as long as we can go back. I'm not saying Arnold has or hasn't, but it's not always guaranteed greys when you hit 60. Meanwhile my step dad has had greys since 40. It depends on the person and their genes. ANd I don't think Arnold has had much face work done - he sure didnt look like it in his Expendables cameo.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 5:16 p.m. CST
Håfström did some awesome beatings in Evil but The Rite was Shite...
by Anklavepak
Liked 1408 a lot so I reckon there's a 50/50 chance the direction is good. Given the fact that Sly and Schwas provide an additional 200% awesomeness each I recon we are in safe hands here.
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But I will need 30 lives to finish that movie.
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People got to know.
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I am 1000x more excited for this than EX2 and I am extraordinarily excited for that.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 7:25 p.m. CST
These two look better here than they have in ages...
by Turd_Is_Floating_Underneath_The_Gravy
Arnold suits a beard, and the grey hair is much better than the ridiculous dye job he's been sporting for a while. He also looks like he's pumped up quite a bit in a very short space of time...understandable given his superior genetics.
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The grey hair is a good choice. He looks like an old badass now instead of an actor trying to fake his way back to youth. Way to embrace your age, Arnold! You will always be my hero.
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This movie sounds objectively awful, but damn if I don't want to see it for some reason. I don't even particularly like either of these actors.
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Aug. 13, 2012, 8:04 p.m. CST
Damn Tomb. Why can't it be the Repairman Jack verion. Would be much cooler.
by Clio
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In their sixties look great, and Arnold was the best of the best. He'll look great again...just never as great as he did in his 30s.
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Doesn't even need aliens. Just a scene Sly and Arnold running down a hallway guns blazing with the game's Level 1 music playing.
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...YOU should go to prison!
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just saying...
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is that the same ultratron?
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Aug. 13, 2012, 8:46 p.m. CST
Okay Nordling - the whole World War II alien idea sounds better than most films I've seen in the last five years. Make it so!
by Mephisto the Great
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Aug. 13, 2012, 9:39 p.m. CST
funny, they will both soon be in the tomb..i wonder if they will be in one together, built by malnourished central americans....or malnourished indochine's..
by Balkin Flabgurter
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ba-doom-tshhh
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Are they usually that clean? It looks like they have impeccable janitorial and laundry services – Stallone's shirt looks pressed and starched.
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Another crappy blockbuster. Who cares.......
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Maybe it's just because I'm a sucker for WW2. I'll say it's a genuine curiosity to see Arnie play an actual Austrian/German and leave it at that.
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Aug. 14, 2012, 8:56 a.m. CST
Nordling - WWII idea Rocks! I have a treatment already in mind
by Metebelis3
Nordling , seriously up for working on this with you!<p> Its perfect for these two actors, and I even have an angle that pitches Arnie's character as duty-bound officer with zero sympathy for the Nazis which ties into the final act. <p>Damnit I can see this movie in my head right now and its more awesome than it has any right to be! <p> In all seriousness, pm me here or let me know how to contact you directly.
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Aug. 14, 2012, 9:16 a.m. CST
Dere iz honlee vun hultratron. I don dew duh uttuh siites dere.
by UltraTron
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Aug. 14, 2012, 1:15 p.m. CST
But the real question is: who will play Schwarzenegger in "Schwarzenegger!"???
by animatronicmojo
"Schwarzenegger!" co-directed by Marty Scorsese and Baz Luhrmann. This big-budget oscar-bait extravaganza chronicles the rise to power of one lusty Hollywood action hero with a serious lack of boundaries who is shoe-horned into Golden State politics by mysterious backers only to publicly humiliate the one woman who stood by him for decades. You will believe that Leonardo DiCaprio is "Schwarzenegger!" Kristen Wiig as Maria Shriver.
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During the early scenes when he's lampooning his image...He has a few weeks growth...He must have had some surgery too around that time b/c he looks like a Plastic Werewolf those scenes.
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Also, Vin Diesel should be the only person escaping from futuristic prisons. That is all.
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Aug. 14, 2012, 4:31 p.m. CST
I still can't believe Ahnold Creampied His Ugly middle-Aged Maid.
by BigTuna
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Aug. 14, 2012, 8:11 p.m. CST
Is this a publicity still or a behind the scenes shot? The lighting is shit!
by quadrupletree
The pose looks like a publicity shot but the washed out lighting is garbage. Unless that's the look they're going for, in which case... it's garbage.
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I'm intrigued about this one.
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