Cool News
MACHETE KILLS Puts A Warlock In The White House!!
The Kidd here...
Well, if you're going to go balls to the wall in trying to top MACHETE, you might as well go all the well, which is why the news off MACHETE KILLS' Twitter that Charlie Sheen has been cast as the President of the United States for the sequel seems bizarrely fitting.
I've been hearing all sorts of rumors about MACHETE KILLS, including that this one "significantly expands the universe" (sounds like the rumblings that the wrong Mexican is heading into outer space may carry some weight to them). But my sources are telling me that the sequel is less race-related and "kicks the shit out of the first one," at least from the script.
-Billy Donnelly
"The Infamous Billy The Kidd"
Follow me on Twitter.
Readers Talkback
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Uh? Yay!
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some big, fake jugs, the kind i like, in this POS...
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and Machete don't post 'first' on internet forums. but if he did, he would probably type 'primero'
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June 21, 2012, 9:15 p.m. CST
The first one had no right to be as fun as it was. I'm totally up for a sequel.
by cookepuss
If it's as batshit crazy as the first movie, how can you go wrong?
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so perfect for this type of movie
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I didn't mind the whole mexican empowerment thing in Once Upon a Time in Mexico, but that movie made me Feel like the final act of Machete was just the same ol, same ol cause of it.
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even though i doubt he ever played a wizard before... ps: with that said, I GUARANTEE YOU CHRISTOPHER WALKEN WILL BE CAST FOR SOMETHING
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Damn I was hoping for Julian Sands
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June 21, 2012, 9:48 p.m. CST
The commentary on race and immigration was fine for the first one. No sense in repeating the same party trick twice though.
by cookepuss
I'm all in favor of taking our favorite Mexican super cop onto bigger and better things. Totally not surprised that Charlie Sheen got cast here. 1. He's nearing Busey level of craziness, which always makes for wonderful onscreen insanity. 2. His dad played the president, which sort of makes him the cinematic Dubya to his dad's less wacky GHW. 3. His real name is frickin' Carlos Estevez, maintaining that theme 4. Oh, yeah. He's crazy. Enough for me to mention it 3 times here. Perfect for the demands of this flick. Bring back LiLo and cast Busey and we've got a batshit sandwich.
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Throw in some Sizemore and the flick would be certified!
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June 21, 2012, 10 p.m. CST
Totally, shropshire. Hollywood is so full of crazy people that you can keep this franchise insane for years.
by cookepuss
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That's why they star the likes of Danny Trejo, Lindsay Lohan, and Charlie Steen and that's also why this bullshit doesn't end up direct to DVD where it belongs. Let me know when RR stars making movies with real actors again and not hacks who'll end up on Celebrity Rehab. Sin City 2 starring Jessica Alba and Tara Reid will fucking suck.
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June 21, 2012, 10:11 p.m. CST
Rodriguez should just stick to cooking shit back in his green-screened kitchen
by Cassius_Crackhead
The cooking segments on his DVDs are ten times better than the repetitive B-movie bullshit he continues to churn out.
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Thought it was a better Grindhouse flick
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In space, no-one can hear your wife have her first orgasm.
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Hell, If Machete can be in space, why not?
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Pepsi is better, but the public has been brainwashed into thinking the other is better. The should get Pacino to do some bit part, maybe the VP.
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a mighty duck, that is.
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Enjoyed the first. Welcome a second.
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I enjoyed MACHETE and ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO, but they both have the same problem: about 3 or 4 too many main characters. It's not a total loss because I like most of those characters, but a badass like Machete or the Mariachi deserves to be the central character in his movie and not just one guy in a big ensemble. I mean, COMMANDO didn't keep cutting away to subplots about other commandos, it was about the one guy trying to rescue his daughter. Simplicity is important. I guess that's why DESPERADO is still my favorite from Rodriguez. I'm glad he's making another one though. I look forward to it.
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June 22, 2012, 4:02 a.m. CST
This fucking hack is right up there with Kevin Smith's cream filled ass on the suck scale
by raging bullshitter
Seriously will he ever make a good movie?
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June 22, 2012, 6:32 a.m. CST
Mel Gibson and Charlie Sheen in one movie? I don't know if the world can handle that much insanity.
by Mr. Pricklepants
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June 22, 2012, 7:33 a.m. CST
dylanisis, exactly. You think Warlock you think Julian Sands.
by Grammaton Cleric Binks
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Exactly what I was going to ask. I thought Julian Sands. Great minds and all that.
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June 22, 2012, 8:23 a.m. CST
Rod needs to cram every idea in his head into this movie
by Spandau Belly
It needs to get as big and as silly as fast as possible. Don't leave anything "for the next sequel". Get Machete into outerspace this movie. The first one was kinda inbetween. It got too silly and messy to be enjoyable as a simple Danny Trejo revenge vehicle, but then it didn't quite get silly and messy enough to be hugely enjoyable on the merits of silliness and messiness.
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June 22, 2012, 8:52 a.m. CST
Everyt time I hear about the idea and cast for an RR movie I get excited about it
by Mr. Giant
Then I see it and it's another undercooked, half-assed jerkathon. RR's just in love with making movies, not making GOOD movies. Seems like he's never going to hit the highs again of Desperado (not like that was a HUGE high, but the action was good). Sin City was decent and his half of Grindhouse was okay I guess.
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June 22, 2012, 8:57 a.m. CST
Danny Trejo is the foundamental flaw to this and the 1st film.
by David Smith
hes just a complete charisma-less, unfunny, unlikable mong
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Loved the first one and now they add The Sheen with Gibson, I cant wait, Sheen is a fucking legend!
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...actually it does. Sad to see what Charlie Sheen looks like these days, unfortunately as they get older people tend to get the face they deserve.
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Though I was expecting the guy from 'Warlock' the blonde guy
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June 22, 2012, 9:36 a.m. CST
We've already had warlocks in the real White House, most of them, in fact
by Sick Fixx
Research Skull & Bones, I mean REALLY research the history behind the symbols they use, and Bohemian Grove and the ritual the Bushes performed there called the Cremation of Care.
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June 22, 2012, 9:41 a.m. CST
@max-beta, that was what was so funny and crazy about it...how the title character is just so anti-typical of a leading man. I liked it a lot!
by Dogmatic
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He's gotta eat.
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June 22, 2012, 10:14 a.m. CST
Harry nailed it when he called MACHETE the only true Mexploitation movie
by MooseMalloy
This fact just goes over peoples heads if they choose to get all in huff about it.
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June 22, 2012, 11:30 a.m. CST
just go crazy balls to the wall violent with this
by fat_rancor_keeper
and everything will work out fine.
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I think he was alluding to Barry O with the former cokehead thing. He used to "bang seven gram rocks" in his day just like Sheen. Well...maybe not seven gram rocks...but he's been around that pool a few times. Machete was like Matrix Reloaded for me. It sucked so bad that I never want to see what came after. Sorry Robert. You lost the fire. I'll skip this one.
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THAT Warlock !
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June 22, 2012, 12:45 p.m. CST
dogmatic-i Know what yer mean, but id prefer to see a proper actor in the role cheesing it up
by David Smith
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June 22, 2012, 12:47 p.m. CST
Great Character just a shit Actor(so-called) playing him.
by David Smith
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June 22, 2012, 3:19 p.m. CST
Is it wrong to like this cast more than Expendables 2?
by Tikidonkeypunch
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That guy is awesome and grossly underused.
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June 22, 2012, 10:02 p.m. CST
"Oh, Julian Sands is in this?" was the first thing I thought, honestly
by NeoDevilbaneX
And then I was disappointed when I saw who it actually is.
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I actually read the fucking thing and it was awful. Vern's fears about expanding Machete's world are well-founded. The first two acts are fun and DO up the ante on a violence scale, but the plot isn't nearly as interesting because there's no social commentary AND it's a giant, poorly-disguised Escape from New York ripoff. Then the entire third act is a giant genre-shifting, plot-bending, fun-killing clusterfuck of a sequel set-up that is 100% UNNECESSARY. I've said it before, I'll say it again: Shaft didn't say a goddamn thing about Africa in the first film, yet he makes it there in a sequel WITHOUT A FUCKING SETUP. All the setup you need for Machete Kills... In Space is for the first 10 minutes of THAT movie (NOT this one) to say, "Hey, Machete's in space now." It makes everything that happens in the first two acts feel pointless, like you're just passing time until you can get to the idiotic third act.
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I admire his level of output, the fact he does it all himelf, his level of freedom, and his loyalty to Trejo. I hate his films....apart from Dusk Till Dawn; which I saw on acid when it came out and still have a lot of love for. I wish Trejo wouldn't try and run in scenes as well. Just get a stunt double, he runs like a really old man and it kills the illusion he is supposed to be deadly.
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Wish they'd started this series about fifteen years ago, when Trejo was a bit spryer, but I'm just glad it exists at all. I hope RR is writing AND directing this one, not handing it off to someone else. And yeah, I sure hope the script's better. Jesus, Machete had nothing at all to do at the climax of the first movie. And the little we did see of him, he was getting his ass kicked! Aaargh, why, RR? Why would you do this to me? But whatever. A Machete movie has so much goddamn potential. I hope this rocks and they make ten more.
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June 23, 2012, 4:06 p.m. CST
@sick fixx, I'd rather have a warlock President than that anti-Constitutional HACK we have now.
by IronEagle74
He's only spent more money in three years than Bush did in 8, jobs are still in the shitter, illegals can come to the U.S. freely, and soon you'll probably have to pay for healthcare that you may not want.
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The writer credited is Kyle Ward, who has done.... oh, right, dick-all. The script is NOT better. I don't know who keeps telling The Kidd that it "kicks the shit out of the first one", but they're either a Rodriguez shill or a leafy motherfucker. Either way it's a lie. The violence is more extreme in a few cases and I can see where some of those scenes will be fun, but the story is about as unoriginal as you can get. Say what you want about the first Machete, it was much more clever than many people credit it. Machete Kills is an Escape from New York ripoff starring Machete that turns into fucking Moonraker or some ridiculous horseshit in the third act. It's HUGELY disappointing.
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Yeah, that's right dumbass, talk shit about illegals in a fucking MACHETE TALKBACK. You can take your right-wing nonsense back to whatever God-fearing shithole spawned you.
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Oh, he minds the Constitution, it's just he's not an American, he's a hyphenated-American, he can cherry pick which points he will acknowledge. Must be great being half of an American, eh?
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Interesting. His mother's white, so if he's only "half American", are you implying that blacks aren't American? And if you want to talk about cherry picking the Constitution, every President from George Washington to George Bush has interpreted that shit the way he wanted. Let's not pretend that the current Mr. Prez is an exception.
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