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The trailer for SINISTER is fucking sinister!
Hey folks, Harry here... I'm so excited for this film. First off, MASSAWYRM wrote it, which means if I hate it I get to write the funniest angry review ever. But, given that a lot of my friends saw the film during SXSW - and they seemed to all love the thing. In fact, they loved it so much, that other horror films they saw after it at SXSW this year, they shat on, citing SINISTER as how to do scary right.
So then, I see the trailer tonight - and yeah. This is the sort of scary movie that will leave purple bruises on my arm from YOKO's 5 Finger Death Grip. I can tell. AND - yeah, the premise of an attic of scary shit... is the reason why I will never ever go in attics. Fuck that noise. Whatever is up there, whatever cursed material is waiting to fuck up my standard of happiness... It can just stay the fuck up there. As soon as I discovered it was about the family that was slaughtered. Shit would be in Police Custody. But, I'm pretty chickenshit when it comes to spooky cursed shit. I mean, if a whole family got slaughtered... HOW COULD YOU LIVE THERE. WITH YOUR FAMILY! I mean, Ethan Hawke is evidently not a horror fan, he hasn't seen AMITYVILLE HORROR - which teaches you to research the homicidal lunacy of your home. And stay away from the basements of those places.
Anyway... I can't wait. I really can't. Now, here's the trailer... sleep tight...
Readers Talkback
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FIRST!
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can't wait, massa!
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Hope the trailer didn't show all the good bits though.
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all alone in the house...can't watch it...gotta wait for other people to watch it with....just...cant..
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and that's Mr. Douche to you spewbacca
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June 13, 2012, 11:46 p.m. CST
"right" a review? Wow. Are you sure that's the "write" word?
by Longtime Lurker
Heheheh.
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June 13, 2012, 11:47 p.m. CST
So, a family moves into a new house and finds a print of Happy Feet in the attic?
by CokeMachineGlow
If I understand the premise correctly...
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...can we ever look at the same tired horror concepts with anything but derision?
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...are answering questions on Twitter right now. It says Ethan Hawke's last response was posted just a couple minutes ago, and the Twitter Q&A seems to be just beginning. I hope it's a good little scary movie just like everyone else, yet I feel kind of bad that Ethan Hawke (who seems to be an intelligent person and filmmaker) has to answer questions like "Is this movie or Insidious scarier because OMG Insidious scared the shittttt outta me?" on Twitter. Also, having to write really short responses due to Twitter's character limit means the questions and the responses will both lack any kind of depth. I guess it's just something filmmakers and actors unfortunately need to do in today's marketing world.
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Wish ya the best Massa, you sir, are at least putting your mouth where your pen is! Glad to see one of "our" own!
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and Massa's trailer made me poop my pants in all the right ways.
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June 14, 2012, 12:11 a.m. CST
Oh my God! Thats the type of scary movie that will scare me so much that afterwards I will have to sleep in bed with my cousin Vinod
by ajit maholtra
I want to see this!
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June 14, 2012, 12:11 a.m. CST
So tired with hearing about Cabin in the Woods and all its bullshit
by LowDevil
It wasnt even a horror movie so shut the fuck up. It was a pretty cool movie that was different. Thats it. Stop thinking about how Cabin has changed everything about horror. It didnt. And ur a fucking toolbox review reading pathetic single loser.
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June 14, 2012, 12:27 a.m. CST
Looks terrible, same-old-same-old ... and a deity named Butt-Ghoul?
by justmyluck
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I'm not sure English is your first language so I will be concise: fuck yourself.
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...but horror movies can get away with that and still be entertaining.
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Seems plausible. I'm in.
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i dont really like the horror genre but i might check it out cuz massa is the best reviewer on the site
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Attics aren't scary (at least not for a 40- year-old), they don't 'fuck up your standard of happiness' (whatever the fuck that means). they don't make noises. you can just stash stuff up there. In MOVIES attics are scary, get it? the reason why you will 'never ever' go in attics is because you're in a wheelchair (reality)
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...a slow-burn but pretty damn scary horror film from Australia. (One part in particular towards the end made me practically jump out of my chair.) The "catching an apparition in the background of photos" was done very effectively in that film, and will creep you out. Check it out! http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0816556/
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June 14, 2012, 12:55 a.m. CST
I'm pretty sure that Harry is only afraid of attics because it would hurt his fat belly to climb up there and he would break it and fall through if he actually made it up there.
by ShamelessElitist
Just sayin
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June 14, 2012, 12:57 a.m. CST
Also that movie just looks like a cross being Insidious and the Ring. Typical PG-13 shit. Not impressed by that trailer at all.
by ShamelessElitist
Also, person who said the name of the deity was Butt-Ghoul: I nearly died laughing.
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Seems like an obvious influence here...
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they are the doors.
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Looks too similar to trailers that i have thought looked good, that ended up disappointing. Hello Insidious!
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It doesn't look bad by any means but every trailer for every godforsaken horror movie just looks the same: Insidious, Possession, The Apparition... the genre needs a kick up the behind like when J horror first came out or Blair Witch. Something for the blu-machine...
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June 14, 2012, 3 a.m. CST
Paranormal 1 was okayish and I really enjoyed Insidious so yeah bring it on. And bonus points for not being a remake or a sequel or a prequel.
by Bradly Durant
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Looks spooky sure, but it really looks too much like everything else in the "creepy ghost face in the bushes" genre lately. Also, the trailer shows too much and basically tells the whole movie in 2 minutes.
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because that looks like a mash-up of The Ring and every other haunted house movie we've seen since Amityville. Since Massa seems to know his shit, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt on this one.
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i didn't see your post which says exactly what i did...
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Love your username here.
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...the fact that Ethan Hawke turns into Johnny Drama somehow in this trailer.
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June 14, 2012, 3:45 a.m. CST
Damn, I was hoping that this was a film adaptation of SINISTAR.
by Daniel Beaubourg
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Tonally it feels incredibly similar to Insidious.
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Back when the movie came out, he raved somewhat about his cameo.
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nothing says Horror like creepy little dark haired girls with that thousand yard stare.
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He's looking old and fat. Didn't realize he was 53. He put on a paunch after he started sharing screen time on Criminal Intent with another set of tv detectives. I thought it was for the role but I guess not.
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All these things are very carefully designed...
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Damn you Michael Bay
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June 14, 2012, 6:22 a.m. CST
Scratchy Edits, Bullshit logic and Cult symbols and I`m done. Sorry.
by higgledyhiggles
I don`t think you really care though.
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i dont care who wrote it, unless its a spoof, it looks terrible.
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Something in that trailer was off and not in a good way.
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Watch the images, see the thing, once you see it, it comes to kill you incessantly. I also kind of feel like I just saw the whole movie. Plus, it looks like Vincent D'Onofrio LITERALLY Skype'd this one in. Tip your waitresses. Try the veal.
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June 14, 2012, 8:33 a.m. CST
How come every possession film has the yoga pose 'boogity-boogity' scene in it
by kirttrik
Ever since the re-release of The Exorcist ever film has that one deleted scene in it. I guess it is better using that than the downward dog or sun salutation.
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Even though it was bit of a softcore 'A Serbian Movie'.
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A: I'm Butt Ghoul. ...and Butt Ghoul wants your kids.
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...where the human eyeball is bombarded with multiple images in less than a second needs to, y'know, totally fuck off.
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seen this before. yawn. don't need to see it anyways since the trailer showed the whole damn movie.
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June 14, 2012, 9:34 a.m. CST
NICE THEY PRETTY MUCH SHOW THE ENTIRE PLOT OF THE FILM IN THE TRAILER... WTF IS GOING ON WITH THIS SHIT?
by Astronut
Don't these studios know they are giving away too much - and that most people want to be surprised when they're watching a movie for the first time..?????? Seriously, This shit needs to stop.
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Getting annoyed about how trailers have become short films. They don't trust us to be intrigued by a mystery, they have to spell things out to make sure we know what kind of movie we're watching. Blegh. I noticed that nobody in the trailer asks the paranormal expert how to fight off or escape the demon-god. Perhaps they are saving it for the movie, which I guess is a good thing. I think the creepiest part of the trailer was the kids in the attic, watching the film -- not the jump scare, just the bits before it.
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No doubt at all some of that background mythology was ripped from the Slenderman tales. That's fine...the character is copyrighted but I don't think the creator copyrighted any of the supporting story. So kudos for taking it from public domain and making what looks to be a creepy picture.
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all made me laugh because all i could think of was Randy Marsh and his night-vision camera in the Pandemic episodes. "I'm... so startled!"
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June 14, 2012, 10:20 a.m. CST
So, the bad guy, "Bagool", is a fucking juggalo
by Half-Baked-Goggle-Box-Do-Gooder
Does this mean that Callista Gingrich will play his mom, "Zuul" ?
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June 14, 2012, 10:20 a.m. CST
Looks like "Paranormal Activity" and "The Woman in Black" had a baby.
by Ironhelix
A kid that is only slightly more successful than its parents.
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...I'd expected a movie critic to write something less...cliched and run-of-the-mill. Sinister? Maybe 10 years ago before Hollywood got all obsessed over J-Horror. Just boring now.
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they're gonna hafta start charging us for trailers if this keeps up
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Harry- if they didn't... there would be no movie.
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Yeah, looks similar-ish. At least we know the movie won't go on for years though, getting more and more complex while getting more and more lame.
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Seriously, the entire movie is bad decision on bad decision on top of bad decision. Fuck why he'd live in that house. How did he even manage to get a family to endanger in the first place?
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also from first impressions this concept is very similar Ringu/The Ring... I saw that movie already and have the BluRay - I like Massa so I hope it does well.
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You're right, white person movies are stupid. All movies should be either made by Tyler Perry, be about fat sassy women, or feature Snoop Dogg piloting commercial airliners.
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June 14, 2012, 11:49 a.m. CST
"BEWARE! I LIVE!" Dang, thought it said SINISTAR, not SinisTER. Drat!
by obijuanmartinez
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Nothing too original but looks like it has an effective creep factor. That being said, people who edit trailers with those shitty, scratchy, blip of 10 different images in one second need to go kill themselves. For people working in a creative industry, they should be ashamed of themselves for actually attaching their names to work like that.
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That was my take-away. Where's Waldo goes all Juggalo and eats your babies.
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"RUN! RUN!!"
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Looks derivative as fuck.
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Not sure why. Looks fucking great.
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Great Film is all in the execution, even the dumbest concept can be made great in the right hands. But... Based on that trailer, this looks like every horror flick from the last 15 years.
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Rip Off of every (bad) horror movies from the last decades. Scary children, contortionist soopky lady, haunted old movie and... Bagul? Bagul? Really?
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June 14, 2012, 2:18 p.m. CST
Just because it may be derivative doesn't mean it isn't done effectively and will scare the poop out of you.
by jawsfan
And "The Strangers" from 2008 was pretty good. Creepy, slow, methodical...
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June 14, 2012, 2:19 p.m. CST
By the way, watch "Funny Games". Either the German version or the English version. Either one.
by jawsfan
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because most of it is brainless shit in a biscuit, but that actually looks cool.
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That looks fucking awesome! I always liked MASSAWYRM, after watching this trailer I'm convinced I love him.
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What a rip-off!!!
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June 14, 2012, 4:11 p.m. CST
Wasn't Harry also in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake? SPOILER inside.....
by v3d
as a severed head?
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He played this monster with red hair and he tries to eat this blind girl. His Mom in the movie was a prostitute who has sex with an entire motorcylcle gang so it drives him crazy. He takes the blind girl to feel a sleeping tiger and then to a house in the woods and then some cops come and shoot him til he's dead.
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June 14, 2012, 4:26 p.m. CST
When film critics actually write movies, it only serves one purpose....
by KongMonkey
To remind us all why they became a film critic, instead of a film maker. These are the people who go thru film school, invest the time and money to learn the craft and technique, but in the end don't have a shred of talent in them to actually contribute to making films themselves. They're left to using their vague writing talents acquired in film school to critique the works of their more talented peers, often with a hint of acquired bitterness, for not being able to fulfill their now hopelessly shattered dreams. BTW, even taking into consideration the horror genres current standing as the gateway into filmmaking like westerns were before .... If you've seen one modern day haunted house film, you've seen them all. So unless Cthulhu or Pat Sajak shows up at the end all deus ex machina, then I'll wait for basic cable on this one. Buhgooool.
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June 14, 2012, 4:49 p.m. CST
Let me guess kongmonkey, you saw Ebert's Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls
by tangcameo
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Family moves to a new place. Father who's working on a new writing project he has good hopes for. Ends up obsessed with something he finds in the attic (instead of the basement). Then it goes and takes from The Ring, King's Sundog, and every film with a scary kid with stringy hair.
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June 14, 2012, 5:27 p.m. CST
Despite the old tropes of creepy children and possession...
by Sithtastic
this was still really disturbing.
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Need happy endings.
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This is what he has to offer?
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June 14, 2012, 6:54 p.m. CST
I also hear that McDonald's chicken nuggets are pretty sinister.
by CodeName
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And bring his leashed duck to the bar?
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June 14, 2012, 7:20 p.m. CST
I have BAGUL's early demo cassettes TRV KVLT BLACK METALS
by the Green Gargantua
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Must be fucking awesome to see your work up on the screen.
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It's like The Woman in Black all over again...and she went after kids too. This is fucking original???
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Since a member of Slipknot is starring in this, will they be on the soundtrack? I need to know so I can pre-order it on Amazon.
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Always liked his reviews, irrespectiveof fact if I agreed with them or not. But this one, from trailer, looks like a pastiche of horror movie cliches/genres. Of course, execution can still save it, but nothing in that trailer inspired confidence.
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based on what I read from all AICNers, this is exactly the sort of movie that will fall flat for anyone who still has CITW fresh in their mind. I mean, humor in CITW comes from making fun of the very same horror movie cliches as present in this trailer.
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Great horror movie parody, while still managing to be a horror movie. This looks like a series of shock moments and no subtlety. I'll pass.
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June 14, 2012, 10:09 p.m. CST
I'm sorry to say that I probably won't ever see this movie.
by sweeneydave
Because it looks TOO FREAKING SCARY! As a family man and a father, I'm just going to have to a skip it. And it kills me, because I love horror. But this freaked me the crap out.
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That's the very reason I refuse to sign up on Twitter, and I think it'll be dead before too much more time passes. All it promotes is that idiotic need in this country to post every single thought on all of our minds thinking everybody really cares what we think. At least Facebook lets you post more than short comments. Die, Twitter, die!!
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June 15, 2012, 2:03 a.m. CST
looks like a good movie...but if i wanna see an unholy creature of darkness haunt children
by Wilford_Brimleys_Diabetes_Rage
ill just join the Penn State football team
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June 15, 2012, 5:05 a.m. CST
shit I've seen bugul numerous times... as members of some black metal band from Europe.
by uberfreak
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June 15, 2012, 5:32 a.m. CST
It started predictably, then tapered off into a ring wannabe - i mean homage - then it got pretty dull. But apart from that it's nice to see Ethan working :)
by cameron
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That shit scared the hell out of me as a kid. I only remember the one about the demonic tiki doll terrorizing Karen Black but that was enough. I had a dream soon after seeing it with a similar premise but instead of a tiki doll it was Grover from Sesame Street terrorizing me. I completely melted his body with a blow torch but his head still remained, bearing teeth and laughing maniacally. That was about 30 years ago and I still remember that dream.
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June 15, 2012, 8:31 p.m. CST
All predictable CGI Jump Scares...god, its the genre dead?
by Seth Brundle
agree with the comment about needing a good kick in the nuts a-la blairwitch project
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