‘The People Version Of Dogshit!!’ Chat Here About Penultimate OFFICE, PARKS, BANG & DIARIES And Antepenultimate COMMUNITY, ROCK, AWAKE, PERSON, MENTALIST, TOUCH, And GREY’S!! Plus EAGLEHEART, PUNK’D, IDOL, And More!! SWEEPS DAY EIGHT!!

Last Thursday’s first day of sweeps arrived with some ratings shockers!

* I am told that last week’s hound-centric episode of “The Office” was, in terms of viewers aged 18-49, its lowest-rated in history. Back in 2005, “The Office” was barely renewed for a second season. Today its 2.1 makes “The Office” the highest-rated scripted primetime series on NBC.

* “Parks and Recreation” hit new season low with a 1.6. The season finales of “The Office” and “Parks” air next Thursday. NBC announces its 2012-2013 schedule the following Monday.

* Last week’s live episode of “30 Rock” (the series’ 2nd ever) hit a 1.6. It’s 2010 live episode from last season brought scored a 3.1. The season finales of “30 Rock” and “Community” air May 17, just three days after NBC announces its 2012-2013 schedule.

* “Big Bang Theory” hit a 4.0 season low last week. It’s still CBS’ top show and roughly tied with “Modern Family” as the top scripted show on television. (And that 4.0 is far from its series low; its antepenultimate episode last season hit a 3.2.

* Already renewed Bad Robot hourlong “Person of Interest” made me do a double take last week with its series low of 2.4.

* “The Mentalist,” also already renewed, hit a 2.2, barely beating “Scandal” with another series low!

* “Scandal” matched its season low of 2.0, but word from inside ABC is it probably will be announced for next season’s schedule on or before May 15.

* Even though “American Idol” went up a bit, Tim Kring’s “Touch” hit another new series low. The first seven nights of the final, 2010 season of Kiefer’s “24” were rated thusly in adults 18-49:
(2.8) (2.8) (3.3) (3.1) (3.4) (3.5) (3.9)

* “Awake” again hit a series low of 0.8. Timeslot predecessor “Prime Suspect” never fell below a 0.9 before it was cancelled.

Thursdays, Feb. 2-April 26, 2012
(18-49 finals; repeats in grey; prior weeks in parentheses)
4.1 (2.5) (3.0) (4.4) (4.7) (---) (---) (5.1) (3.2) (5.3) (5.1) (5.6) (5.5) Big Bang Theory
4.0 (3.9) (4.3) (3.9) (4.4) (4.2) (4.6) (4.9) (5.4) (4.5) (5.1) (5.8) (5.5) American Idol
3.3 (3.2) (2.9) (2.8) (1.2) (1.2) (3.0) (1.4) (1.1) (3.1) (3.2) (4.0) (3.6) Grey’s Anatomy
3.3 (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) NFL Draft
2.5 (2.2) (2.7) (2.7) (2.7) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Rules of Engagement
2.4 (1.5) (1.8) (3.0) (3.3) (---) (---) (3.4) (1.8) (3.1) (2.8) (3.3) (3.3) Person of Interest
2.2 (1.5) (---) (2.4) (2.7) (---) (---) (2.8) (1.7) (2.6) (2.7) (3.0) (2.9) The Mentalist
2.1 (2.2) (2.2) (1.0) (1.2) (---) (2.4) (2.6) (2.5) (2.6) (2.3) (2.5) (2.8) The Office
2.0 (2.1) (2.0) (2.0) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Scandal
1.9 (2.1) (2.3) (2.3) (2.7) (3.3) (2.2) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (3.9) Touch
1.6 (1.8) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (1.8) (1.7) (1.7) (1.7) (---) (1.7) Parks and Recreation
1.6 (1.5) (1.4) (1.2) (1.5) (1.6) (2.0) (1.4) (1.4) (1.5) (1.5) (1.6) (1.3) 30 Rock
--- (---) (1.5) (1.2) (1.3) (1.5) (1.7) (1.7) (1.6) (1.7) (1.5) (1.7) (1.8) Up All Night
1.4 (1.3) (1.4) (1.3) (1.7) (1.7) (2.2) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Community
1.4 (1.3) (1.4) (1.5) (1.5) (1.6) (2.1) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Missing
1.4 (1.5) (1.8) (1.7) (1.6) (0.8) (2.0) (1.9) (1.8) (1.7) (1.6) (1.9) (---) Swamp People
1.1 (1.0) (0.4) (0.4) (1.2) (1.3) (1.2) (0.4) (0.4) (0.5) (1.4) (1.3) (1.2) Vampire Diaries
0.8 (0.8) (0.9) (0.9) (1.0) (1.2) (1.6) (1.6) (2.0) (---) (---) (---) (---) Awake
0.7 (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Don’t Be Tardy
0.7 (0.8) (0.8) (0.8) (1.6) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Pauly D Project
0.7 (0.7) (0.9) (0.9) (1.6) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Punk’d
0.6 (0.6) (0.7) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (0.5) (---) (---) (---) (0.4) After The First 48
0.6 (0.8) (0.6) (0.5) (0.6) (---) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.7) (0.4) (---) (0.7) Colbert Report
0.6 (0.7) (0.5) (0.6) (0.5) (0.4) (---) (0.5) (0.6) (0.6) (0.6) (0.6) (0.6) Conan
0.6 (0.9) (0.8) (0.7) (0.7) (0.4) (0.7) (0.5) (0.7) (0.8) (0.6) (0.4) (0.8) The Daily Show
0.6 (0.8) (0.6) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Eagleheart
0.6 (0.7) (0.7) (0.6) (0.6) (0.7) (0.6) (0.8) (0.5) (0.4) (0.5) (0.4) (0.6) The First 48
0.6 (0.8) (0.8) (0.7) (---) (---) (---) (0.4) (---) (---) (0.7) (---) (0.7) Impractical Jokers
0.5 (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.4) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) Impact Wrestling
0.5 (0.5) (0.3) (0.4) (0.6) (0.7) (0.7) (---) (---) (---) (0.7) (0.8) (0.7) Secret Circle
0.5 (0.5) (0.5) (0.5) (0.4) (0.5) (0.4) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Sweet Genius
0.4 (0.5) (0.5) (0.4) (0.5) (0.5) (0.4) (0.4) (0.4) (0.3) (0.3) (0.3) (0.4) House Hunters
0.4 (0.5) (0.5) (0.4) (0.4) (0.4) (0.4) (0.4) (0.4) (0.3) (0.3) (0.4) (---) House Hunters Intl
0.4 (0.5) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) Kathy
0.4 (0.4) (0.5) (0.4) (---) (0.4) (---) (0.5) (0.4) (0.5) (0.4) (0.4) (0.5) World’s Dumbest
0.3 (---) (---) (0.2) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) (---) The Five
0.3 (0.2) (0.3) (0.2) (0.3) (0.2) (---) (0.2) (0.2) (---) (---) (0.3) (0.2) Hannity
0.3 (1.5) (1.6) (1.0) (1.7) (---) (1.5) (0.9) (1.0) (2.2) (0.9) (1.2) (0.9) NBA Basketball
0.3 (0.3) (0.4) (0.3) (0.3) (0.3) (0.2) (0.4) (0.3) (0.2) (0.3) (0.4) (0.3) O’Reilly Factor