Hack/Slash gets a new director who has experience in both Hacking and Slashing!
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. Action/horror comic Hack/Slash has been trying to become a movie for years it seems. It's a difficult business, sometimes everything moves so fast you can't tell which way is up and sometimes it takes movies years to get the stars aligned right.
The producers and Relativity have hired one Mr. Marcus Nispel to direct according to The Hollywood Reporter's Heat Vision Blog. Will this be the step that finally gets the cameras rolling? You never can tell.
Nispel isn't exactly the most beloved genre director on the planet, but he's shown glimpses of quality in his directorial efforts thus far. I wouldn't say he's 100% hit anything out of the park, but there quite a lot to like in the production value of his Chainsaw and Friday the 13th remakes.
The basic premise of the film is a fun one: the main character is the typical final victim in every slasher (the virginal girl), but pulls a Ripley (and/or Dexter) and walks the country stalking slashers her ownself. There's a fun movie in that premise and I hope they find it. Lord knows we could use more fun horror flicks.
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Jan. 13, 2012, 9:12 p.m. CST
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:18 p.m. CST
The best contributor on this site.
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:32 p.m. CST
I figured we would never see Nispel get another decent directing gig. Sorry, but he really hasn't done a remotely good movie yet. I liked Firday the 13th more than a lot of people, but that isn't saying much. Conan was a waste of two hours of my life. Not even a naked Rachel Nichols (or her body double) could make that piece of crap remotely watchable.
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:36 p.m. CST
He's got a great eye for visuals, but the scripts he's worked with have been poor. As for possible lead choices, let's start throwing names out there: Rose McGowen Jessica Beil Jessica Alba Mila Kunis Amy Adams Megan Fox Natalie Portman Kiera Knightly
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:39 p.m. CST
I admit that I never watch his Texas Chainsaw Masacre reboot, but Friday the 13th was garbage (although watchable garbage at times) and Conan the Barbarian was a disaster.
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:41 p.m. CST
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:50 p.m. CST
...unless they make some major changes. But hey, all good if that's their intention. No complaints here.
Jan. 13, 2012, 9:53 p.m. CST
Rose McGowen- studiowont do it Jessica Beil- she wont do it Jessica Alba- she wont do it Mila Kunis- would be cool but unlikely Amy Adams- REALLY NOT HAPPENING Kiera Knightly-she doing art type movies.
Jan. 13, 2012, 10:09 p.m. CST
Kat Dennings Danielle Harris Olivia Wilde Noomi Rapace -but the goth thing she did already Mia Wasikowska Anna Kendrick Sasha Grey
Jan. 13, 2012, 11:06 p.m. CST
... he can't hold the camera steady and quick cuts ruin his work.
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:03 a.m. CST
by Mr. Moe
I'll never watch another film of his. I don't care how good the trailer looks, or even if it gets good reviews (which we know will never happen).
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:40 a.m. CST
When did this happen?
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:57 a.m. CST
He ruined Conan, absolutely ruined it. He also ruined an unruinable premise (Vikings vs Native Americans) in Pathfinder. The guy is just flat out a terrible director. He doesn't even have a good eye, Conan was one of the ugliest looking movies I've ever seen (and incomprehensibly edited to boot)
Jan. 14, 2012, 1:59 a.m. CST
What a fucking waste of visual creativity. The man sucks at everything he directs. Sorry, Marcus.
Jan. 14, 2012, 3:16 a.m. CST
by Ray Gamma
Cos, I'm just wondering, you know.
Jan. 14, 2012, 3:27 a.m. CST
Seriously, the film's saving grace was Jason Momoa's performance as Conan. Everything else was painfully mediocre
Jan. 14, 2012, 3:28 a.m. CST
Do you mean Sasha Grey the porn star? Not exactly a bad choice, seeing she does look the part. Excited to see this move forward. Wondering how the ad campaign for this will play out.
Jan. 14, 2012, 4:37 a.m. CST
Alison has campaigned hard for that role and she's perfect for it. Sadly, this may end up being another Fairuza Balk/Death situation where a certain actress is born to play a role but becomes too old or uncommercial before it gets made.
Jan. 14, 2012, 5:25 a.m. CST
...that makes him perfect for the project. Maybe they could get SLASH to write the script?
Jan. 14, 2012, 5:28 a.m. CST
...I figure Nispel could make a decent flick out of it. I thought his FRIDAY THE 13TH was a bunch of fun (and certainly not the worst in that franchise) until the action moved into Jason's "lair" in the third act. All of that stuff was completely misguided but I don't blame Nispel for the idiotic choices Bay and his Plantinum Dunes goons made in the process of cobbling the script together.
Jan. 14, 2012, 6:33 a.m. CST
Jan. 14, 2012, 7:05 a.m. CST
I'm a fan of the comics, which always felt like a slightly edgier "Buffy" if that character was put up against slashers like Jason and Freddy. I do like the idea of a modern day Van Helsing hunting down these kinds of supernatural monsters (imagine Michael Myers or Leatherface being afraid of their own boogeyman). Nispel is hit or miss with me. I liked the Texas Chainsaw remake and enjoyed the hell out of Friday the 13th, but Conan and Pathfinder were complete dogshit. He might have the right eye for this kind of stuff since it falls more in line with the slasher territory he's already tread, but the relationship between Cassie and Vlad is probably the most important element of the story. If they screw that up, it's fucked.
Jan. 14, 2012, 8:06 a.m. CST
I don't see that as a good fit. Death is supposed to be cute, Balk has too much of an edge to her. Zooey Deschanel is perfect.
Jan. 14, 2012, 8:46 a.m. CST
Jan. 14, 2012, 8:57 a.m. CST
guess i can stop wishing for a hack/slash movie now. stupid studio execs.
Jan. 14, 2012, 9:49 a.m. CST
This movie is bound to get a C-List cast. Jessica Beil and Rose McGowen are the two biggest actresses he has ever worked with. Neither have been known to put fannies in the seats opening weekend.
Jan. 14, 2012, 9:51 a.m. CST
and they couldn't even handle that. Fuck. How can you even go from the original to that shit? Just insane. Did nobody working on the production see the original? I mean you would think someone would have seen it and just tried to make one little aspect like the original.
Jan. 14, 2012, 10:42 a.m. CST
Because fucking up Friday the 13th, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and especially, ESPECIALLY Conan just wasn't quite enough of a sin against cinema already, apparently... Just because you can frame a shot doesn't mean you can make a movie. Nispel might have made for a half decent DP, but his work thus far pretty much proves that he doesn't have what it takes to be a good director. He can't seem to spot weaknesses in a script, let alone bring anything to the table to help make a bad one better, he can't manage to bring the characters in his films to life cinematically in any way, or do anything to help the actors in his films deliver the goods, performance wise. He has absolutely no sense of pacing, and he seems to have no real vision for any film that he makes beyond picking out some stock standard visual look and trying to approximate that on screen. And he sure as shit has no idea how to put all the pieces together into any sort of cohesive or satisfying whole. I mean this guy had a 90 million dollar budget on Conan, and he delivered something that looked like a Xena episode from the 90's, only with slightly better cgi. Seriously, Nispel is up there with Ratner and Wiseman and Cohen and Sommers and Emmerich, and their hollow, untalented ilk, as directors who shouldn't even have a career to begin with, but sadly, for us lovers of cinema, not only do have a career, but seem to get their run of projects that might have had potential, if only these hacks didn't get involved with them to begin with. Meanwhile guys like Lynch and Cronenberg and the like struggle to even scrape together funding, unless they have a 'star' attached who is on an 'real artist' vanity kick. Life just aint fair. Hollywood even less so.
Jan. 14, 2012, 11:56 a.m. CST
by Rob Jenson
. . . and as a massive REH fan I'd rather see Nispel deep in director jail. It's not just the scripts failing him. To be sure, the script for Conan sucked big time, but a good director could have still made something out of it (if nothing else by ordering a script rewrite!). Nevertheless, it was not a well-directed movie. I doubt he'll ever redeem himself for Conan. Then again, I thought the same of Fincher after Alien 3.
Jan. 14, 2012, 11:58 a.m. CST
You take out a lifetime of anger by unleashing shitty remakes and reboots on an unsuspecting genre audience. To tell the truth, I think CONAN is easily Nispel's best film. Think about that. Tied for worst - THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE, PATHFINDER, FRIDAY THE 13th.
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:07 p.m. CST
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:08 p.m. CST
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:12 p.m. CST
Well its easy first the character is a sexy hot women. TARGET audiences are males who read comics, play video games, watch horror and porn. It's not really hard sale. The comic is not for kids. The movie should be targeted to them. It's really is that easy
Jan. 14, 2012, 12:16 p.m. CST
You do know that Nispel might night be all to blame for Connan remamber the studies and producers all was have notes because its there money.
Jan. 14, 2012, 4:08 p.m. CST
Hack/Slash is excellent. I like Nispel's Friday the 13th remake, thought Conan was entertaining in a B way, but yeah ideally a Hack/Slash movie would be more in tone with Sam Raimi stuff.
Jan. 14, 2012, 5:01 p.m. CST
He's a horrible director. No sense of rhythm or pacing in his movies at all. No suspense, no anticipation. Just tedious, lifeless money shots. This guy has no idea how to shoot with editing or story in mind, and no idea how to build a scene. Seriously, I'm convinced this guy thinks that a movie is just a long string of shots put in chronological order. Horrible, horrible director.
Jan. 14, 2012, 6:58 p.m. CST
Fuck. My beer soaked life is sadder than all the dead Christmas trees
Jan. 14, 2012, 9:32 p.m. CST
Say what you will, Nispel has directed some terrible films (Pathfinder), but take the ending scene of Friday the 13th for example, it's a masterpiece. You could submit that scene where Jason smashes through the dock like a shark to the academy for finest short film and it would win any year in my book.
Jan. 15, 2012, 3:09 a.m. CST
Jan. 15, 2012, 4:52 a.m. CST
Neil Gaiman himself had Balk in mind for years when he was trying to get DEATH: THE HIGH COST OF LIVING made. And you can't really argue with the great man himself.
Jan. 15, 2012, 11:03 a.m. CST
I Googled it and it seems Balk and Gaiman are friends. I admit I still don't see it, I'm reading the Annotated Sandman vol. 1 and for the last page of the Calliope issue Neil says "Death is too fucking perky to allow real tragedy once she gets on stage". I don't find Balk all that perky but it's not my characters and stories. Right now, like I said, I would pick Zooey Deschanel as Death and for Dream I'd pick Benedict Cumberbatch. Has Gaiman ever picked an actor for Dream? I know early on there was references to him looking like Bowie, and Avery was picturing Johnny Depp while working on the film script.
Jan. 15, 2012, 12:36 p.m. CST
DO NOT GIVE HIM THIS GIG!!! This sadistic bigot is the worst choice possible just about anything, but especially for a story that's dependent upon a strong female lead and subversive wit.
Jan. 16, 2012, 4:34 p.m. CST
by Jon Forbing
I just wish Tim Seeley would draw AND write it more often. He's a better artist than almost every guy he gets to draw it for him. As far as a move version goes: I'm all for it. I'd like to see them do Cass's origin story with her slasher mom in the first half-hour, then spend the rest on one of the other slashers from the series. Maybe the crazy skinless surgeon or the video-game-obsessed kid who murders people in the corn field. I'd prefer an unknown as Cassie, rather than try to fit some existing starlet to it.
Jan. 19, 2012, 7:14 p.m. CST
Should be good but could be great!
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