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AICN Exclusive: The Long Awaited Poster for Joss Whedon & Drew Goddard's CABIN IN THE WOODS!!!
Hey folks, Harry here... Sometimes you get phone calls that kind of make you scratch your head. So this week I got a call from Lionsgate asking if I'd like to premiere the first teaser 1-sheet for CABIN IN THE WOODS, a film written by Drew Goddard and Joss Whedon. I said sure, thinking all that would be required of me would be to say, "Here's the poster..."
Then a couple of days ago they send me the poster. I looked at it. It is cool. But as I stared at it I began to realize... I really don't fucking know much about this movie. I mean, I know that it was the first lengthy screen role for Chris Hemsworth... He had filmed his awesome opening scene in STAR TREK, but we were supposed to see this before THOR... hell, we were also supposed to see him in RED DAWN before THOR. But MGM got in such financial wet the bed syndrome, that they didn't even have the money to market and release these films.
For most geeks, CABIN IN THE WOODS is the one we're curious about because of Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard's participation. Let's face it, Whedon has a significant fan following and always will due to his awesome work on BUFFY and ANGEL... and Goddard, who is directing for the first time, has worked not only on BUFFY & ANGEL, but dipped his foot in the JJ Abrams worlds of ALIAS & LOST. Now, Joss is directing AVENGERS and Goddard is writing Spielberg's ROBOPOCALYPSE script. So yeah. There might be something to these guys. But all of that still raises the question...
WHAT THE FUCK IS CABIN IN THE WOODS?
Lionsgate called me two days ago to see if I would like to talk to Goddard & Whedon about CABIN IN THE WOODS & it's momentous poster debut... "Sure, sounds fun!" was my response.
The call was scheduled for 12:30pm Pacific time, but I received a late text message on my phone at 12:22pm (Central time) seeing if I was ready in 8 minutes for the call. ARGH! So I rushed to get my computer - pulled up the poster... thought about what I had heard about the film - and got on the phone with the guys.
OK. So it might have helped if I'd seen the movie. Because it was absolutely clear to everyone involved that other than feeling fairly certain that there could be shirtless Chris Hemsworth in this movie... and that it might seem possible that EVIL DEAD had some manner of influence on this film... and then the Rubik's Cube Log Cabin In The Sky... well that just threw me.
Both Drew and Joss love the poster and the design. They like that it makes you wonder what is going to happen in THE CABIN IN THE WOODS... mhm, I am wondering. But they were very deliciously funny about not giving me any real clues as to what happens in the movie. I had asked LIONSGATE for a Synopsis before the interview... this is what I was sent...
THE CABIN IN THE WOODS SYNOPSIS:
Five friends go to a remote cabin in the woods. Bad things happen.
If you think you know this story, think again. From fan favorites Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard comes THE CABIN IN THE WOODS, a mind blowing horror film that turns the genre inside out.
Produced by Whedon and directed by Goddard from a script by both, the film stars Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins and Bradley Whitford.
See what I mean? Coy as hell. Alrighty, so I decided to ask how they felt during the MGM problems and Joss answered, "Anger, Denial... and then mostly sleepy" Sigh. Drew & Joss both talked about their love of the poster, I mentioned how impressed I was that it just wasn't a poster of Hemsworth taking his shirt off. They both felt that that will be coming at some point. Along with the required photoshop heads poster. I asked if they had a name for the poster... Joss answered straight away that he likes to refer to the poster as BARTHOLOMEW...
I asked them about their favorite movie poster and Joss mentioned that he was a big fan of that "Saul Bass guy," but loves his THREE COMRADES poster and Goddard mentioned that he has a beautiful French THIRD MAN poster. I have the American 1-sheet for THE THIRD MAN, but am well aware of the beautiful French poster...
Knowing that Joss has a habit of creating things that become action figures - I asked them if they had any characters in this film that they wish would get made.
Joss answered instantly, "The Ballerina" - and Drew answered, "1 armed PATIENCE."
Ballerina? What the hell does that mean? I mean, there was a that wonderful stop-motion BALLERINA scene in EVIL DEAD 2 - is that in this? Is it something different? He would not explain himself. Drew's answer was helpful, because on IMDB, there is a character named PATIENCE BUCKNER played by Jodelle Ferland... and now we know she has apparently 1 arm. Another look at IMDB tells me there's a bunch of BUCKNERs in this film. A Matthew, a Judah and a Mother Buckner. There's also some other curiously titled characters over there... like Richard Cetrone's MERMAN?!?!? Or Patrick Gilmore's WEREWOLF WRANGLER?!? Tyler Onassis' NOSFERATU?!!?
Officially - what the fuck? I'm not sure what happens in THE CABIN IN THE WOODS, but it seems to be fairly radical. Sounds genre bending in a way that could be a whole lot of fun. Certainly the film is supposed to be a puzzle box of a film, that twists and turns and reveals more. At least that's what I gathered from Drew and Joss playing with my mind - and the intent of the poster. What do you folks think? Whatever, we get to find out the truth about THE CABIN IN THE WOODS on April 13th, 2012.
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Looking forward to this finally hitting. As an unabashed lover of all things "cabin horror," it would be hard for me not to like it. Also want to see what Goddard can do behind the lens.
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I'm glad it doesn't remind me TOO MUCH about Evil Dead 1 & 2......
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nice to see a poster try something conceptual outside of cliche retro stylistics or photo real portraits.
I guess a Rubik's Cube is a retro reference. -
Anyone ever read "House of Leaves"? This poster gives me the feeling Drew Goddard has.
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Having read the script, this poster definitely works. The script was an interesting take on the horror movie genre with strange twists. Looking forward to this...finally!!
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that was made into a crapfest of a movie in 2008. It had some great ideas but it was executed horribly. Reminds me of this, especially with the list of Buckners.
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Dec 01, 2011 2:59:15 PM CST
A giant Rubix cube...match all windows on one side..
by openthepodbaydoorshal
all doors on the next..
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...forget the bus ad for Tower Heist, which had to be the quickest, lamest Photoshop job in the history of Hollywood advertising.
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I didn't apply this year. I thought this was gonna show up at Fantastic Fest. But no. Now if I was a betting man, I'd guess Harry has negotiated this showing at his annual B-day bash.
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I mean, it only gives away the ending, the villain is Dr. Rubik and the cabin takes off into space.
This could be good if they get the atmosphere right. But if the "horror" just boils down to a bunch of jump scares and CGI creepy-crawlies, all the Buffy / Firefly cred in the world ain't saving you, Joss. -
...which is good...
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It will be overly talkative, have a convoluted plot that can only be resolved by a strong female character who has some kind of paranormal ability.
And fucking vampires!!!
If you use this Nordling call me...
Nordlings best source!!! -
But enough of this super secretive shit. I suspect it's a reaction against the modern Internet age of geeky movie website spies and such, and I support a backlash against the amount of spoilers we see these days. I love going into a movie knowing next to nothing.
But that's not what this is. That's not how I felt with Cloverfield or Super 8, either. It was one thing when in the 80's I sat down to watch Raiders for the first time, not knowing much more than it was an adventure film. That was pure. Magical even. It's another thing to have these neo-nerd filmmakers basically put their fingers in their ears and screech "NOT TELLING NOT TELLING NOT TELLING NOT TELLING!!!"
Seriously, fuck off with this "I've got a movie idea but I won't tell you what it is, just come watch it" bullshit. Why does it have to be either end of the spectrum? Either we get shitloads of spoilers or we aren't even allowed to know what the fucking movie's about? Christ. Fuck both options. Give me a decent synopsis. Nothing else. I don't want to see the entire movie in the trailer, but goddamnit I'd like to know what the fuckin' thing's about! -
But this poster gets a pass. Just the general attitude I get from Whedon I don't like. There's a trend for this right now amongst geek properties, and I think it's gone overboard. Here we have a poster that gives us an idea as to what we're in for without actually giving anything away. Great! But the filmmakers themselves just come off fucking smug and too cool for school. I don't mind being teased by a movie's promotion, but this Whedon/Abrams nonsense is more like taunting. It's hard for me to get excited when all they give me to be excited about is that it's a movie and these guys made it. Little more substance please!
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I read the script and I'm not a horror fan at all (though I am an obvious plant), but this is a really clever and interesting take. (Again, take that with a grain of salt because I'm a plant.)
In some ways it's what you'd expect from Whedon -- an overt knowingness of the genre, yet still milking the genre for everything it's worth in terms of thrills and scares. (What do I know, though, I'm just a plant.) But it's also darker, dirtier, and more disturbing than your typical Whedon fare. Funny, too. (At least it catered well to my plant-based sense of humor.)
And the ending is absolutely plantshit. I mean batshit.
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Havent we seen a poster for this before?
In fact, a series of posters? -
That's what a teaser poster should be.
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...is fucking a brilliant book!
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WTW?!?!
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But without those names I'd have turned the page already.
Like most people, I'll check out the opening week reviews, which will undoubtedly give me a least an idea of what the film is about. -
Dec 01, 2011 4:56:53 PM CST
JUST RELEASE THE DAMN MOVIE ALREADY! IN THEATERS!
by green_lanterns_roommate
DAMMIT!
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Dec 01, 2011 5:57:59 PM CST
I want to touch Kristen Connolly with my penis.
by hyperdyne-systems-model-120-a2
I probably won't, though. Still, can hardly wait for the movie!
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It's called a teaser poster. Do you go to a strip club and complain none of the girls seemed to genuinely like you?
Consider yourself teased. -
The plantiest planty plant plant of all plantily plants.
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Dec 01, 2011 6:18:42 PM CST
M.C. Escher on dope. Good dope. Seriously Good dope . . .
by billybatson1000
Would this actually count as an exclusive? I mean here on AICN? The first in . . . decades? Harry?
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The phone calls, the interviews, the poster exclusive, 10 days from BNAT. This will play BNAT13WOLF. I'm so sure I'd stake my life on it. I wish I could be there because this film has been clouded in secrecy for YEARS now.
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That's sort of an oversimplification of my point, but no big deal. It's wroth noting, at the end of the day I agree with you. I will see this film (will also be my first time playing in the Whedon-verse!), as I love all things horror, and this looks like it came about with a legitimate desire to scare the shit out of me. So I'm there.
Especially if it's anything like House of Leaves. -
Dec 01, 2011 7:58:50 PM CST
The guy that directed Cloverfield is writing and directing this movie?
by judaspriestly
Well then, that's enough incentive to not see this.
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Dec 01, 2011 7:59:18 PM CST
Good job, studio! You just bought yourself a positive review on AICN!
by sierratangofoxtrotuniform
Too bad it won't mean shit because the relevance of this site has long since gone the way of the dodo thanks to the greed and immorality of its creator.
Deliciously funny? I don't know what's more annoying -- that or every time Harry "giggles" like a fat, giddy, retarded schoolgirl. -
I trust Joss Whedon and Chris Hemsworth. I'm going to try desperately to avoid spoiling this one, starting with not posting on movie fan sites!
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how's he getting on at that shit site he left for anyway?
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Dec 01, 2011 10:36:00 PM CST
It's just another cabin the the woods movie... with a TWIST!
by stereotypical evil archer
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--which is what I'd expect from these over-rated clowns.
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They are all already dead and the cabin is purgatory.
Hmmm...that sounds familiar to me for some reason...
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Dec 02, 2011 12:33:04 AM CST
My copy of 'The Long Way Home' (BtVS -S8) just arrived this morning.
by starcent
My resistence collapsed and i'll probably be getting them all.
Damn, I miss buffy.
:¬(
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I know exactly what you mean. If this movie is even half as scary as that fucking book, which still fucks with my head to this day, we're in for a treat. I had to put that book down because I felt like what was happening to the narrator was happening to me, while he was describing it happening to the former occupant, eeeghghrh. Brilliant.
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His garden is SO pretty *girly sigh*
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...here's a poster for Cabin in the Woods.
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Dec 02, 2011 6:27:00 AM CST
At last! Two film makers who are willing to take us back to a time when we didn't know shit before we saw the movie
by barryknowles
Love the internet, but it's spoiled the joy of seeing a movie for the first time.
Even if you try to avoid info about a certain film, the chances are if you are on the net, you will see something about it by mistake you would rarther have not seen. -
Love his tv work, consistently great ideas, dialogue, and narratives... Can't wait to see anything with his name on it.
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Could it be the "Rashomon" of horror films? If that's the case, it'll borderline brilliance on concept alone.
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Dec 02, 2011 7:40:33 AM CST
"a mind blowing horror film that turns the genre inside out" I hate this type of hyperbole
by asimovlives
they turn me off. even if it's true and the movie achieves that, still shouldn't be in the advertizement.
this is the type of advertizement hyperbole that always bites in the ass afterwards. more modesty can go a long way. -
What about a humorous novelty cake of some kind? I'm pretty sure if you type "funny cake" into d'internet you might get an example. Of course I can't vouch for the deliciousness of the cake itself, but if you find one that looks funny to you, then you've found a possible answer to your question.
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That book kicked my ass! Brillant, brillant book.
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The angry ghost of a girl with long, dark hair wakes realizes it was all a dream and tells her split personality that she killed Keyzer Soze. Also, they're in purgatory.
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...poster?! Attachd with a ridiculously long write up...for a poster!! AICN must be desperate for news these days it seems, making mountains out of molehills.
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a song by Chubby Checker.
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A candy colored clown they call the sandman.
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Dec 02, 2011 11:49:59 AM CST
I find those toy reindeer that poop out candy deliciously funny.
by sweeneydave
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Dec 02, 2011 11:59:18 AM CST
Did anyone see Triangle (2009)? It was like a horror version of
by sweeneydave
Timecrimes (2007) only it really didn't make any sense whatsoever. I still enjoyed it lots for the ride.
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a great promo item!
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I don't find regular actor portrait posters or normal scene montage trailers intriguing, in fact they kind of deaden my interest to see a movie "first-run", but a "teaser" style poster or preview always gets me interested in buying a ticket.
I hope movie marketing strategy just shaves down to the teaser philosophy.
Some kids I know just got in a film fest and I mocked up a quick teaser poster for them:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v18/ufoclub/bindlestiff.jpg -
Dec 02, 2011 12:53:36 PM CST
I wonder if this is actually a horror, thriller, SCI FI movie!
by hanyoyo
Absolutely no reason to think it, other than a standard horror movie with a bunch of people who slowly get killed off would be utterly dull – as it's been done to death (excuse the pun).
The image in the poster looks more science-fictiony than horror to me. I only mentioned thriller because that's how IMDB classes it. Which is sort of the go-to description for any film with a bit of a build up before it erupts into the inevitable crowd-pleasing scenes of death and violence.
However, if the film initially looks like it follows the standard horror format, but doesn't actually turn out that way it would be a pleasant surprise and more rewarding for tits audience. I think there's a higher chance that this film will be another possessed home/ghost/monster/devil-type story. Time will tell... and AICN will be sure to ruin the surprise as soon as they find out! -
...it's one of those films where either space or time alter every time someone enters a different room.
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It has credits for Leprechaun. If it's a teaser poster, it doesn't even need credits.
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Dec 02, 2011 1:22:32 PM CST
I really do like it - but who scratched it all up like that? Harry? Moves the movie from my "won't bother" list to my "at least rent it" list.
by trollspotting
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Dec 02, 2011 1:24:31 PM CST
On the Well-Intended Humor front - Tucker and Dale are going to be pissed at what someone did to their vacation home. Still like it.
by trollspotting
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Dec 02, 2011 1:25:46 PM CST
Reading this article causes me to scratch my head.
by sierratangofoxtrotuniform
Is Harry too fucking lazy to actually post an interview like other contributors to this site do? Instead its nothing more than an excuse for Harry to ONCE AGAIN do his "well, I was on the phone with such and such" bullshit while rambling on incoherently about stupid shit. Then we get a few blurbs from the bigwigs he chinwagged with.
This isn't your fucking stupid blog, fatman. Write up a proper interview or pass it off to your clearly superior colleagues. -
Recently got a $1,000,000 advance from Knopf Doubleday for the first 10 volumes of a reported 27 volume serial novel named "The Familiar". Plan is to publish once every three months between 2014 and 2020. Sounds like somebody's been looking at the business model of writing TV scripts/seasons. Story is said to be about a girl that finds a cat. Which sounds a bit like a gag or a Wind-Up Bird Chronicle homage, on first impressions.
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Dec 02, 2011 1:37:32 PM CST
siouxcitysarsaparilla = great news, had not heard. Looks like I will have to build another book shelf between now and 2020.
by trollspotting
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The poster is a sketch done in an hour or so (like a storyboard), and instead of using dummy text (Lorem Ipsum), I put in the "Leprechaun" credits as an inside joke to the director. Even the nonsense tagline was just made up by me, just to to have a composition element up top. The only part that's accurate to the movie is the character who does appear. And at one point characters do wave a flag.
I put in the production credits because this could very well become the only poster for the film. That would be cool in my opinion, since I wish the teaser vibe could always be the main marketing. -
Dec 02, 2011 1:40:48 PM CST
asimovlives = I hear you. House of Leaves screwed me up for weeks after I read it. Arguably longer now that I think about it...
by trollspotting
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Dec 02, 2011 3:28:32 PM CST
Harry, you shouldn't be saying the poster is an AICN Exclusive
by doctortom
I saw the poster at Bleeding Cool before you had it posted here. That doesn't exactly sound like an exclusive.
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Gotcha now. I've made a few posters (during my short stint collaborating on indie multi-media stuff):
http://www.uterinefury.com/mosquito_grove_poster_02.html
http://www.uterinefury.com/blut_uberall.html
http://www.uterinefury.com/wer_er_ist.html -
Dec 02, 2011 4:39:59 PM CST
Has anyone ever tried to produce a film based on The Navidson Record? from HOV?
by the green gargantua
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That Ripley's the Big Bad!!
FACT! -
I like that third one a lot! Maybe you should make illustrations this way just for fun, as art, without a movie even instigating it.
If you make it about something topical, or personal, it might catch on! -
Every...I mean, EVERY online publication has linked to AICN. Bleeding cool, THR, Fangoria...fucking everyone worth their salt.
Don't start an online blog war unless you have to! The losers become over-weight & bearded & you can't tell the difference between them & the winners & the other losers....
It's all very distracting. -
Woodcube
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Rashomon crossed with the Cube crossed with Monster Squad?
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Has anybody noticed that most of the pictures AICN puts up these days have an Amazon URL? I know people have complained about the relentless pimping for Amazon on this site before, so I just thought that was... a little odd...
Maybe there's a story there that I'm completely missing. -
Dec 04, 2011 4:02:38 AM CST
As long as there are topless sorority girls called Taylor getting hacked to pieces, it's all good.
by highfunctioningsociopath
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Jesus Christ, I don't need to hear every detail.
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Dec 04, 2011 8:53:24 PM CST
was Chris Hemsworth in Star Trek? I thought that was Chris Pine.
by halowiscious
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Dec 05, 2011 4:10:19 AM CST
@sweeneydave - Yes, I loved the horror flick Triangle w/Melissa George
by slayme
and it actually does make a good bit of sense - with a couple plot holes - but for a time travel/horror flick I thought it was superb - much better than any other horror flick I saw that year.
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I also saw Triangle and loved it. It's the only movie I can think of that has a narrative structure with a double-nested closed timelike curve. And it's *almost* internally consistent. There's one scene, part of the way through, with that woman on the top deck... not sure I've ever seen anything like that before, ever, anywhere.
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