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Green Lantern pissed Quint off.
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. So, Green Lantern pissed me off. I went in a fairly blank slate. I was a Marvel kid, but I’m not totally ignorant of the DC Universe. I know the basic concept behind the Green Lantern Corps even if I can’t quote you the rogues gallery like I can X-Men or Spider-Man.
I love the concept of a sci-fi action superhero movie, so don’t think I went into this movie wanting to pick it apart. All I wanted was a good movie within this very rich universe. I got the rich universe part, but not the good movie part.
Ryan Reynolds tries, God bless him. He really does everything he can to elevate this movie, but there’s only so much he can do with some of the horrible dialogue he’s forced to churn out and he can only sell so much fantasy before the mediocre CGI overwhelms the picture.
But he does try and often succeeds at making Hal Jordan likable even if the script wants you to hate his guts. The arc is a very familiar one… a swaggering asshole learns humility and compassion in 105 minutes. Unfortunately other than Reynolds’ inherent likeability we see Jordan go from smarmy douche (who parks like a dickhead, apparently) to heroic world-saver in a blink of an eye.
In other words, they don’t earn their arc. There’s a lot of unearned stuff in the movie. The Joseph Campbell hero’s journey is solidly in place, but it’s like the filmmakers looked at Iron Man and tried to do that without understanding why that particular movie worked so well. Green Lantern is a paint by numbers superhero film, all the beats you expect are there (down to the post-credits stinger), but in this film they feel arbitrary and not ingrained into the overall story at all.
The big problem with this film isn’t that it’s just flat out awful. If it was, I could more easily write it off as a failure and move on. But what’s so goddamned frustrating here is that there are moments that really work. Oa, for instance, is well designed. The Kilowog training scene is great. The visualization of the power of the Corps is great, as are the sheer numbers of crazy beings that fill the ranks of the Corps. The main villain, a massive fear cloud with a big alien head on it called Parallax, is pretty solid, too. The effects are dodgy at times, but the concept of it is pretty harsh and reminds me a bit of The Nothing from The Neverending Story.
Mark Strong as Sinestro is much better than I thought he’d be and his initial dislike of Hal Jordan makes for one of the only truly interesting character relationships in the movie. And let’s not forget Reynolds himself, who spends every second of screentime trying to sell the universe and the character.
But the little bits that work only make how awful the rest of the movie is stand out. That’s what pisses me off about this movie. The elements were there, the ingredients are all there, but director Martin Campbell and the screenwriters (all four of them) don’t assemble them into a working film.
Jordan’s weakness, his insecurity due to the accidental death of his father, feels shoe-horned into the plot, his relationship with Carol Ferris (Blake Lively) is muddy and the giant-headed Hector Hammond (Peter Sarsgaard) is only a surface level villain. Hammond kind of knows Jordan, wants to bone Ferris and I guess that’s why he goes a little crazy when the evil Yellow hate energy takes him over. If this triangle had been played up a little more it might have meant something to me, but as it stands it feels like the writers just needed a basic excuse to inject drama into this sub-villain plotline.
While we’re talking about Carol Ferris, let’s discuss just how horrible Blake Lively is in this movie. This is my first real exposure to her work (I saw The Town, but have no memory of her in the movie) and for a few minutes I thought she might be deaf. Turns out that’s just how she delivers dialogue. Blank-eyed and monotone isn’t exactly the best way to sell a romantic relationship.
The more I think on it, I think one of the broad reasons this movie doesn’t work is that introduces the idea of this amazing team, the Green Lantern Corps, with an amazing power and endless interesting characters, and then just abandons it for Hal Jordan’s romance and hobbled hero’s journey arc. The interesting movie is in the Corps as they face a villain that challenges them in ways they’ve never been challenged before.
That should have been the story. Once Jordan goes to Oa he doesn’t return to earth until he has to in order to save it. If we had more time with the Corps, had more teamwork on display, and less lone hero stuff the movie would have worked a lot better.
Oh, and it’ll also help if you have a coherent script. That, too. Things just happen to happen in this film, with the barest connective tissues. Especially the “post credits” bit that makes absolutely zero sense except that what happens there happens in the books. The action doesn’t match, there’s no reason for this particular character to do what he does other than they need him to for a sequel.
The scene itself is fine, but A has to lead to B, not to J. There’s no motive, it just happens. And that’s the movie. Things just happen, like someone went down a checklist of what geeks want in their superhero movies with no thought to actually making them make sense within the context of the story.
So, I walked out pissed off. I’m still pissed off. This could have been great. Hell, at this point I’d settle for good. What I got instead was a turd sandwich that is cobbled together with what looks like delicious ingredients. If only they didn’t take a huge dump on it I could have had a great meal.
-Quint
quint@aintitcool.com
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Readers Talkback
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miscast
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what credibility he has left will be destroyed
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I'm guessing we won't see a Justice League movie for a while
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Not really. But I still like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hTiRnqnvDs
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As soon as it became apparent that WB was holding back the reviews under and embargo. I mean if you want to sell your new franchise and launch the DC Universe you don't hide until the last minute. You let word get out that your movie is good, that it works...anything. Look at Thor, for example. A harder sell than Iron Man and yet the advance word was stellar and helped a lot. That should have been the GL tactic, but WB new this was a sinking ship and hid.
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Nobody was expecting this? People thought this had a chance of being good?!
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yup that was something that was clear in all the trailers...the fanboys kept crying that the effects weren't finished yet etc...even ILM or WETA could not salvage the design choices...looks like a Sci-Fi channel movie...maybe it will get a 'so bad I like it' following like Flash Gordon
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This looked like it was going to suck monkey balls from the minute the first trailer came out. Is anyone seriously surprised that it's shit?
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June 16, 2011, 5:23 a.m. CST
Expected a shitty movie, leave forums satisfied
by AllPowerfulWizardOfOz
When I saw the first trailer I knew this was going to be a disaster. Captain America will win the Summer as far as the Super Hero movies go.
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somebody at AICN posted that it was a much improved trailer which really made the movie look amazing...all the trailers looked like total crap
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would like to stick it in blake lively, her brother was a shit actor too
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And it is totally shit ... ! The trailers were typical godzilla trailers (only showing the best stuff).
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Warner Brothers makes them and not DC. And the WB is so disconnected from the material that they are making "comic book movies" because other "comic book movies" have made tons of money. So they copy the formula regardless of the hero involved and make a crappy movie as a result. The crazy thing is WB can't even figure out why their movies don't print money. As a huge DC fan (just hate the gritty realism of Marvel even if it does make for better characters and stories - I just like my heroes black and white thank you very much, you may keep your gray) I watch every crappy DC movie knowing it's crap, and I watch every good and bad Marvel movie cause I know the only way I'm going to get more superman or anyone else on the big screen is if the WB sees some other comic movie rake it in.
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Personally, I cannot buy Reynolds in anything other than smug comedy. He grates on me, and has no range. Can you remember the early buzz for this movie, from the studio pinheads? How it was going to be the next Star Wars. They must have meant from the Phantom Menace onwards. The early CG shots were cheap, obvious and abysmal. Nothing seemed in place from the get go. $30,000,00 pissed against a wall. Marvel are going to steam roller the box office while DC continues to remake the most boring and unnecessary element of Superman – his origin – and all the ground covered – to the point of utter futility and BOREDOM – by Smallville. Only the 3d Batman film can save their coffers.
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Always thought the comic book was kinda lame, but in all honesty I never read it, it just struck me as being kinda goofy. As for the movie, I thought it looked great, then I thought it looked terrible, then I thought it looked great, then I thought it looked terrible...now it looks terrible again. It just looks so damn cartoony. I'll probably just wait for the blu-ray.
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It's what he wanted to do anyway
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That should be what pisses people off. Also the studio off - because they would have had more B.O. returns that way considering the GL reviews.
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June 16, 2011, 6:14 a.m. CST
@ justmyluck - YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY F*CKING RIGHT!!! THIS IS WHAT PISSES PEOPLE OFF MORE!!!
by marineboy
The quality and returns on those 25 indie flicks could have more potential, start more franchises, and have greater critical acclaim than piling all that dough into a turd like GL.
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June 16, 2011, 6:16 a.m. CST
So that piece of wood in the trailer was indeed Blake Lively?
by HollywoodHellraiser
We all seen that first trailer and saw her performance coming miles away. This is what happened when medicore actress are cast in movies to 'act', instead of showing their T n' A! And Ryan Reynold SHOULD HAVE HAVE NEVER BEEN CAST AS HAL JORDAN!!!! Ryan not a bastard but maybe they should have went some one like Jon Hamm or something.
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June 16, 2011, 6:24 a.m. CST
I'm scared for Superman now (moreso). It looks like DC was just lucky with Bats
by Citizin_insane
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June 16, 2011, 6:31 a.m. CST
What's sad is that they decided to go full-blown scifi with this story
by D.Vader
And the REAL problem is that the execs will look to that and blame the movie's failure on that creative decision instead of admitting the bad script created bad reviews and turned people off.
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It's probably for the best. That probably woulda sucked too. DC should focus it all on their animations from now on -- those shows rarely disappoint, and JLU is THE best superhero cartoon ever made.
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be all dark and gritty in case GL flops in the BO?
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June 16, 2011, 6:34 a.m. CST
Ryan Reynolds absolutely SHOULD have been cast as Hal Jordan- fucking A
by D.Vader
It sounds like he was the only one trying to salvage this awful script. Fuck that nonsense that he shouldn't have been cast to begin with; it sounds like he's one of the few positive things about the movie.
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June 16, 2011, 6:37 a.m. CST
After buried, I though Renolds could be taken seriously. After Casino Royal, I though Campbell knew how to avoid a stinker. I though After Batman Begins that DC new how to please nerds...
by Citizin_insane
oh how wrong I was
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June 16, 2011, 6:38 a.m. CST
And all you people who saw this for the turd it was. Forgive me for not being a cynical asshole...
by Citizin_insane
but seriously, it's proven that cynics have a better grasp on reality. Lucky miserable bastards
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and watch them rot away on the shelves of walmart. then get discounted at Walgreens, then get discounted at Big Lots, then end up in the Dollar Tree. Then move on to Goodwill.
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He's "Secret Origins" Hal Jordan. Not the gritty, hardened, Vietnam War vet of the original Hal Jordan. This movie is the Rebooted version, and as that Hal, Ryan Reynolds is a great choice (Although I think he would have been a much better Flash...). WB is killing the movies by going through the motions. Think what you will about Marvel, at least they are working towards something, not just A to B to C to D. Sure, the movies might not be epics, but at least they are "okay" for escapism. And I never thought I would say this but... Fox hit XMFC out of the ballpark. Now give me a period Green Lantern / Green Arrow movie with David Boreanz as Hal Jordan and ... hmm... no idea who as green arrow... Olyphant maybe?
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June 16, 2011, 6:58 a.m. CST
Well that's another 200 million dollars the humanity spent so well
by Ricardo
Instead of feeding the hungry, no, let's do an over-the-top piece of shit movie about green lantern.
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I haven't been to the movies in months, not even to see THOR or X-MEN which is crazy considering that for most of the past fifteen years I would have usually attended a midnight screening for them. I'm just too busy and more so constantly preoccupied... can't enjoy a movie when I'm preoccupied... I'm a bit more neurotic than your average bear. Aaaanyhow, always thought GL was one of the cooler concepts for a superhero... his powers basically a product of his will. And from the looks of the trailers I was planning to see this for sure. I think, despite all the really bad reviews, I will still try to go see it soon.
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Another missed opportunity to take a sci-fi story with so much potential and make sure it will end up in the franchise graveyard. I find it ironic that, if the stories are true, they were willing to "throw money" at this thing over worry about special effects, but not "throw concern" at it over the story and script. If the effects were a little rough but the story good I would have still seen this opening night, IMAX. Now I'll just put it in my Netflix queue...
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June 16, 2011, 7:07 a.m. CST
This is my first real exposure to her work (I saw The Town, but have no memory of her in the movie)
by THE_CHOPPAH
I thought Blake Lively was very good in THE TOWN, and I very badly wanted to fuck her face.
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...it would have to be someone capable. And no feckin origin stories. Anyway, can someone get a Dr.Strange movie off the ground please.?
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Because I called it. While a shit load of people here were wearing their rose colored glasses and in COMPLETE DENIAL OF THE TOTAL CRAP MOVIE WHICH AWAITED THEM, I called it.
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I had the privilege to sample some of the finest Abbottabad ganja before I took in my courtesy screening, and, damn, I felt like I WAS on Oa. Quit yer bitching, fanboys. Man up, take a couple hits, go see it, and drop out of reality for a couple hours.
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Does that really bring you so much happiness to say so on an anonymous message board? You could just as easily have been wrong. And if you hang your opinions on the AICN crowd instead of your own reactions, somethings wrong. See it yourself, you may end up liking something about it that prevents it from being a total wash.
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That's the problem with most of you haters. Go see the movie, THEN post your comments, trolls.
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June 16, 2011, 7:39 a.m. CST
Time to send the "Hero's Journey" plot on a Journey to Oblivion.
by cookylamoo
or have a story where the Hero really does say "fuck it" and leaves.
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What does "I called it" even mean? This sounds like the gloating of someone who "called" that AVATAR would suck or bomb and were ruthlessly denied by Big Jim's engorged dick thrusting its way rudely into your eye sockets and down into your throat.
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June 16, 2011, 7:46 a.m. CST
I haven't seen this yet, but just from the trailers here are my issues.
by Grammaton Cleric Binks
Yes, I think Ryan Reynolds works with what's given him. My pick would have been someone older, and more mature. Test pilots aren't daredevil assholes as they have life and death in their hands. They are professionals. Can you say Captain Sully? Having said that, why does the ring pick an asshole to have all this power. Second, and correct me if I'm wrong, but Parallax was what Green Lantern became after killing all the corps when he went nuts after Doomsday destroyed Coast City. Now again I'm no GL expert so maybe there's more to it than that. Thirdly, you'd think DC would have learned the lesson from Fantastic Four that we don't want to see heroes fighting clouds of crap. We want mano a mano. So, if they greenlight a sequel, it's time for Sinestro to turn to the dark side. Now don't get me wrong, I do really want to see this. Even with three negative reviews I want to give it a shot. By the way, sometime last year someone cobble together several movie and tv clips to create a fake GL trailer. That is what the movie should have tried to be. I'll keep my fingers crossed.
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it isn't really fair to demand a galaxy ensemble form an origin story. I'll say it here cause I said it over there.... GRANT MAJOR. The look, make up, CG....all this shit means nothing huh? It is so easy to fall back on "...this plot point didn't work.....this actor wasn't doing it for me....". Look at the world they created. There is so much more here than your average superhero origin.
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June 16, 2011, 8:02 a.m. CST
Maybe Reynold's likability is the problem. Maybe they should have gone with Tom Cruise.
by cookylamoo
The secret of most Tom Cruise movies is that Cruise presents a convincing asshole through ninety percent of his movies and then somehow comes through at the end. He keeps the outcome in some kind of doubt. He's doesn't play the puppy dog.
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June 16, 2011, 8:03 a.m. CST
As I stated that's the problem. They made Jordan an asshole.
by Grammaton Cleric Binks
I mean think what would have happened if they made Bruce Wayne an asshole.
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It's like you're trying to retrofit a Pinto with late-model Kia parts. CHOP this fucker down and build a new site from the ground up. It's what a Professional would do.
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Why is there so much hate in that precious little heart of yours? Does your real last name happen to be Palin?
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Par for the course I guess.
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Thank you for being one of the only reviews to point out how horrible she is.
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Christian Bale is another actor who really knows how to play an asshole.
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Shows how much I've been paying attention. As much as I don't like her, she was good in THE TOWN. Can't believe you don't remember her. As far as the Green Lantern goes, I remember everyone wanting Nathan Fillion. I don't get the whole Ryan Reynolds thing. He just seems so bland to me, even the way he looks. I haven't been impressed with him so far. So I guess I don't know why this movie is. lol And if you're saying there's mediocre effects, which I can't understand in 2011, then why bother? I swear to you I've seen like 4 movies this year. 4. I can't believe it myself. But the shit they keep putting out. And then I'm reading about Crowe and the Superman reboot and I'm thinking "Who are they doing this for?". They just shoot this shit out, do it half-assed and for what? Just to make a movie? Does anyone care about this crap anymore? Because I'm beginning not to.
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June 16, 2011, 8:22 a.m. CST
Bale's Batman was Wayne pretending to be an asshole as cover
by Grammaton Cleric Binks
underneath he was pure professional dead set on a mission. There was no pretending with Jordan apparently.
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Still thinking about you. But it's only consentual 60% of the time now :(
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THE_CHOPPAH. See this film my choplings. Are you gonna listen to these critics and trolls who "called it". You go ahead. Let someone else tell you whats good. I'll take Blake titties and LSD over minor pacing problems any day.
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June 16, 2011, 8:26 a.m. CST
Bale was/is an asshole playing a guy who pretended to be an asshole.
by v3d
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aint nuthin bland about them abs. Reynolds has a pose down flex fest up in this bitch. Even the testosterone fueled CHOPPAH popped a semi in that scene. Excellence recognizes excellence.
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June 16, 2011, 8:32 a.m. CST
Interesting to see so many DC Marvel actor crossovers
by Grammaton Cleric Binks
First there was Marsden in X-Men, then Superman returns. Reynolds was in Blade III, then Wolverine, and is now the lead in a DC movie. It's interesting because let's say as an actor you're in a McDonald's commercial. In your contract, just for that itty bitty part, you can't star in a commercial for a Pepsi because Mickey D's is a coke addict.
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So if you don't see the movie and base all your opinions on the trailers and um critics then your opinion has no relevance, you don't know what you are talking about so maybe be quiet the adults are talking.
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June 16, 2011, 8:35 a.m. CST
Jim Carrey and penguins is turning out to be better than Green Lantern?
by SifoDyasJr
That's just sad... Can't wait for Captain America to finally hit!
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did you see it? It is so hard being CHOP and being so ahead of the curve. There aren't many people to talk to at the top.
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Damn, that's a shame. I really hate that DC only holds on to Bats and Supes and never touches any of their other characters. It's times like these you have to be grateful that movies like Watchmen were not in the hands of these guys. I think the failure of GL boils down to not choosing the right director for the job.
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who cast that distracting as fuck Tim Robbins in this. I swear he is half the problem with peoples overall perception of this movie. Tim Robbins shows up on screen.....movie grinds to a halt. FUCK YOU TIM.
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GL fucks Thor in his bleach blond asshole.
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Should have gone with someone with a little more gravitas in their presence, mood, and much better humor style than Reynolds. Dry wit > goofy any day.
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RR fucks Nath..........er.........uh.........
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It's easy to run out and say "I told you so" if you've been a naysayer since the beginning. No one gave a shit because you probably sounded like you were talking out of your ass (the way every 'this is gonna suck' talkbacker sounds). No one cares.
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I kept trying to restrain myself from yelling at my dog for pooping on the carpet.
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I'm still slightly fluffed about the Human Torch and Cap being the same actor... hope it's not distracting. Wonder if the Deadpool movie is still on the table after GL (which is sounding like it will flop with this kind of bad word of mouth).
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IN BRIGHTEST DAY, IN BLACKEST NIGHT, THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR TARGET DEMOGRAPHIC IS ONLY WHITE! GREEN LANTERN'S LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Although I kindof agree that comic book movies need to go (there are too many now and only a few of them are any good), and that comics should stop trying to be movies (they're two completely different artforms), I still dearly love comic books -- from cool/smart/arty indie stuff like Clowes and Ware to good mainstream stuff like Morrison, Moore, Brubaker, Johns, et al. How could you want THE BEST artform of the 20th century to die? HOW??? And to think you shared my love of the Trons. (At least, I think you did. I thought we traded love for Legacy back and forth a few months back.)
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June 16, 2011, 9:07 a.m. CST
"Unfortunately other than Reynolds’ inherent likeability we see Jordan go from smarmy douche (who parks like a dickhead, apparently) to heroic world-saver in a blink of an eye. In other words, they don’t earn their arc.
by hst666
"Unfortunately other than Reynolds’ inherent likeability we see Jordan go from smarmy douche (who parks like a dickhead, apparently) to heroic world-saver in a blink of an eye. In other words, they don’t earn their arc." Can't be worse than Thor on that front.
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June 16, 2011, 9:07 a.m. CST
Playkins, I always thought James Marsden would be a great Cap
by Grammaton Cleric Binks
Just give him a blond dye job, and there you go. As we never saw his face except for a minute in X3 it wouldn't make a difference that it's the same actor. I agree it kind of rubbed me wrong to see the same actor play two different Marvel characters, but it looks like he's actually a good choice for Cap so we'll see.
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that is a whole lot of bull pucky.
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I mean seriously. This is prime for SNL's "Really?" I mean really after seeing the craptastic trailers you really thought this movie looked good. I mean really the ridiculous looking CGI costume and characters actually made you think this movie wasn't going to be total crap? And definitely really outside of the new Batman movies what DC movie has WB done that made you think oh this will be a great film? LOL I'm just bagging up at the people that swore Green Latern would beat X-Men First Class and Thor. With Marvel's track record I'm feeling pretty good about Captain America. Marvel definitely isn't perfect (I'm looking at you X3, Wolverine and the 2nd half of Spiderman 3) but at least they seem to get it what it takes to blend the comic mythos along with fresh take to introducing it to a new audience.
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Screenwriters work on this movie and no one sees that the story is shit? Just about every review of this movie says the same thing. Are they afraid for their job and future work so everyone keeps their mouths shut and says "this is gonna be a great movie"? When a big movie fails and everyone that reviews the movie says pretty much the same thing I can't comprehend how the folks making the movie didn't see it coming. Good CGI effects are fairly common now so you can't expect the movie going public to be so wowed with the effects that they overlook the story.
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I had little interest in GL. The first teasers turned me off. The next batch piqued my curiosity a bit, but I wasn't sold on it. I have no history with the character. To me, the DC universe begins and ends with World's Finest. Imagine if Joss Whedon had stuck with Wonder Woman (and, god love him, wasn't too precious about it), and that's the film we were getting this summer -- I would be all over it. Because WW is fantastic, iconic, forever. GL, for me, is not, so my care level was always low. But why would I want it to be a bad film? Trumpeting it's apparently failures as your victories or the victories of a populace tired of superheroes is creepy and stupid. GL being unmitigated shit does not make the world a better place. I don't know; I don't get it. I want every movie to be the best movie it can be. What's the point, otherwise? Marvel/Disney is far too invested in their AVENGERS project to let the genre die. Sony and Fox are far too desperate to hang on to the rights to the characters they have, so will probably continue to churn out something with them forever. I really am dead tired of superhero films, but I don't want the world to fill up with expensive, pointless crap that will embarrass the human race when aliens come to take over -- or maybe even spur them on to invade, because we're clearly not a top-level species. I want the films to be good enough, interesting enough, to change my mind.
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June 16, 2011, 9:51 a.m. CST
Definitely not ready for Comic Book movies to go. I just wish
by Wcwlkr
I just wish they had the right people behind the camera and scripts consistently to make it work. Bad Comic books movies are just going to be apart of the fabric of film. Every genre is going to have them. Action, Western, Sci-Fi, Comedy, and so on. Just because you have some bad ones don't mean you get rid of the genre itself. You're going to have great ones like Spiderman 2, X-Men First Class, and The Dark Knight. And you'll have bad ones like X3, Wolverine, and Superman Returns. Bad movies in a genre is no reason to give up on them. It's just like when you had the re-emergence of the Roman style battle epics after Gladiator. For every Gladiator there's a Troy or Clash of the Titans but doesn't mean you dump it. Because you'll still get Gladiators and 300s.
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in that we should have spent 50% of our time on Oa, with Carol Ferris dealing with Hector Hammond on Earth. That of course, would have taken an older an more experienced actress to have pulled that off. This approach is closer the comics, because they let GL spend most of his time in space with his Green buddies.
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Like Adrienne Palicki, she comes off as a manufactured beauty, and not a natural one. A product of the times and a plastic surgeon. As such, she tends to appear like she's had her face beaten repeatedly until it becomes some acceptable form of 'beautiful'. Sarah Jessica Parker is the classic example of someone who has just destroyed her face with plastic surgery. Either way, actressing is simply something you can't fake. Either you've got the looks or you don't and people who let others take sharp instruments to their face are simply not pretty imo. It just makes their insecurities stand out.
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Especially the part, where Hal Jordan became Parallax and... gosh; that was in the books... DAMN, I'm out! Worst movie 2011! Good, we had Thor and will get Cap!!! MAKE MINE MARVEL!!!
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June 16, 2011, 10:03 a.m. CST
Please, Hollywood, can we retire the Evil Amorphous Cloud of Evil villain for good?
by THAT_SAID_THE_CHOPPAH
You would think after the disastrous bastardization of Galactus in FF2 and Lost's Smoke Monster that the concept would have become redundant and obsolete.
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Lost's Smoke Monster was a fine concept! But you forgot the Evil Amorphous Cloud of Evil villain turning out to be VOYAGER 6 in Star Trek TMP! Or TOS's Evil Amorphous Cloud of Evil villain in "Obsession"!
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I've heard that the scene explaining that was actually cut. I wonder if maybe this is yet another case where a movie has been edited down to incoherence? I'm sure the script is to blame, just look at the writers, but I'm curious of maybe the editing is to blame as well?
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Quint has every right to be pissed. My review stated just about the same sentiment. http://nitro5737.blogspot.com/
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June 16, 2011, 10:46 a.m. CST
GOOD. I HOPE THIS DESTROYS RYAN'S CAREER AND HE HAS TO TURN TO WHORING HIS ASS OUT ON CRAIGSLIST.
by BSB
I've got a stack of 20s raring to go.
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June 16, 2011, 10:48 a.m. CST
Leonardo DiCaprio will pay millions of people to see this
by Spandau Belly
Did you guys read about the expenses this guy has dropped on making Blake Lively happy? I'm just waiting to hear that my country is being renamed because Leo just bought it for her. Not that I would mind saying I'm from Livelyland. It's got a cute ring to it.
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June 16, 2011, 10:50 a.m. CST
* * * ATTENTION QUINT * * * PLEASE UNBAN MCGOOCAIN AT ONCE * * *
by BSB
He was the one trying to talk sense to the moron spamming the Palinback. Thank you!
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June 16, 2011, 10:51 a.m. CST
* * * ATTENTION QUINT * * * PLEASE UNBAN MCGOOCAIN AT ONCE * * *
by BSB
He was the one trying to talk sense to the moron spamming the Palinback. Thank you!
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ST:TMP may be the first instance of the Evil Amorphous Cloud of Evil villain. I'll have to look into that.
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After getting that power ring from the suits a few months back, how's he going to produce the glowing review they want, when everyone else says it's shit?
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A FUCKING HORRIBLE film ( # 1 ), and that got leaked three weeks before release (# 2)-had two MAJOR DEATH KNELLS going for it...yet it burst out the box office gate with $90 million opening weekend. I like Reynolds. I hope the film does good.I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT, but who knows..maybe they'll make a sequel (with a director who understands it), and then maybe Justice League down the road. THAT would be great
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June 16, 2011, 11:13 a.m. CST
Ah, screw this movie; I'm just going to watch 'Digits: Get Some'
by THAT_SAID_THE_CHOPPAH
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Kirsten Dunst? Kate Bosworth? Liv Tyler?
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June 16, 2011, 11:29 a.m. CST
a swaggering asshole learns humility and compassion in 105 minutes.
by Thunderbolt Ross
HA! good one
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June 16, 2011, 11:32 a.m. CST
HEED THESE WORDS. CLOSETED GAY MEN WILL MAKE THIS A BLOCKBUSTER.
by BSB
Just watch where you step in the theater.
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from WB that doesn't star Batman and Superman. I guess nobody likes DC characters- sigh.
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Ryan "Dumbass" Reynolds Brandon "Stick up his ass" Routh Christian "I'm gonna fire your ass" Bale And whatever piece of ass they get for Wonder Woman
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June 16, 2011, 11:46 a.m. CST
HARRY WHERE'S YOUR GREEN LANTERN REVIEW?
by HarryWhereIsYourInceptionReview
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June 16, 2011, 11:58 a.m. CST
The public wants -- nay, DEMANDS! -- your GREEN LANTERN review, Harold Throckmorton Knowles IV!
by THE_CHOPPAH
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... they kept true to the comic ?? I mean seriously, Green Lantern comics were never very good to start with. DC as this way of doing one good story arc to show off the Hero, build up momentum then just plainly go back to 100 issues of stupidness and emptyness of any good story arc that can be. They'll push him in space for a couple of issues, make him do really big fists but story wise nothing that can come close to impress us. Then when the comics stop selling.. they go nuts, someone in the Editor's office says "How about we reset the world?!!! Let's have a big collapse and it's as if all the past never happened!!".. And voilà .. DC Comics..
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Honestly, I liked it. So did the majority of other people I saw it with. Nobody was complaining about how shit the movie was. Maybe that's because it didn't cost anything. I mean, it wasn't "tight" but it wasn't either a mess or garbage. Could it have been better? Sure. I didn't pay to see it but if I had paid for it I wouldn't have felt ripped off or disappointed.
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was trying to strongarm us into not thinking the leaked stuff, images of the suit, and the trailers didn't bode well.
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Marvel is on a roll and they just seem to get how to make a modern, superhero movie. For one thing: hire good actors! (and hire actors that actually resemble the hero they're portraying. RDJ in Iron Man? Best. Superhero casting. EVER.) Second, get the tone of the film right. If you don't believe the "reality" of the world these heroes are in, you won't believe in the film. It's just like Marvel vs. DC comics: real worlds, real problems, real heroes. That's where Nolan has been so successful with Batman: make it real and believable. The lone, modern DC superhero movie exception that proves the rule. (The original Donner Superman film got this, too, of course, but the sequels obviously did not!) You can have humor in the films, but you can't make a mockery of the genre or the hero. That's why Thor works, why Hulk works, why Iron Man works and why Captain America will work. Just look at the trailers for Thor and Cap versus Green Lantern: it's night and day. Green Lantern is 60's, TV, Adam West Batman. (Which was great, in a campy, wink-wink, nudge-nudge way) With the Marvel movies, there's this serious, real world, with impossible beings in it and people react to them in a very REAL way. For me, the tone of the films is everything and Marvel just nails it. WB made a superhero movie that hates comic books. Marvel makes a superhero movie that makes comic books come alive! And that makes all the difference. Excelsior!
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Folks... I know a lot of you have been reading pretty horrendous reviews of this movie... and... those reviewers, well, they are entitled to their opinions. THAT SAID -- for me -- well, I grew up watching the Sunday 3 AM cartoons brilliantly drawn by Strombolius Winkerdoodle, who probably most of you haven't heard of, but... for me, this movie was like a $300 million Winkerdoodle cartoon, and so I sat in the theater with a big goofy grin on my face the whole time. They don't have Winkerdoodle on Netflix yet, but if you still have a Betamax player, you can find some of his finest work on eBay and -- for $300 a tape, it's well worth it.
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June 16, 2011, 12:57 p.m. CST
Epitone, almost perfect! You just need a random name drop or 10.
by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform
Maybe a giggle here or there.
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June 16, 2011, 1:08 p.m. CST
'I KNOW RIGHT!' hahahah you FAILZ Reynolds...you FAILZ...hahahaha
by Arkhaminmate001
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June 16, 2011, 1:17 p.m. CST
'I Thought This Looked Like A Home Run' ... Helen Keller, is that you??
by golden tribw
What kind of blind deaf idiot could see a trailer for this festering pile of wank and think anything other than 'oh my good christ, that looks embarrassing!' ... ?
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And the A>B>J hint is he's not tempted at all during the movie.
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I saw the movie last night and no, the movie was not that bad. It’s no Dark Knight but it isn't in the same class as Ghostrider, Wolverine or both the Fantastic Fours. It’s an entertaining movie that is an origin story. Origin stories suck!!! But it’s not a bad start. My 2 complaints? 1)The suits. Why are they CGI? They look like shit and are distracting. 2) Blake Lively. Horrible acting and completly miscast. Not bad on the eyes thou.
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I was disappointed by both of them and everyone seems to love them. I just dont understand it.
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This has looked like a turd sandwich for months. I have friends that worked on it and I feel sorry for them because they have 2 more scripts and want to make this a huge franchise bringing everyone back to work in Louisiana. They need to make $600 million to break even on this shit pile of a film.
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June 16, 2011, 1:44 p.m. CST
and to think, astronut said this movie was going to be THE SUMMER HIT
by fat_rancor_keeper
pfttt
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June 16, 2011, 1:46 p.m. CST
I'm a DC guy but even I felt dissapointed after the previews. Marvel people are quick to come out and talk smack....
by Dirk Shocker
but they forget about Fantastic Four, Wolverine, X3, Elektra, Spiderman 3. I mean common... check yourself first before you talk shite. DC has Batman movies, Constantine, V for Vendetta and yes Superman Returns. That movie's flaw was the Kriptonite mountain lifting scene but it had a lot of heart.
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To clarify, I was referring to the quality of the recent Marvel Studios roster. Yes, the movies you name were all total shit! Superhero movies made by people who don't understand the genre and hate comics. Whereas the recent Marvel Studios films are made by comic geeks for comic geeks, with a respect for the material. That is the difference as I see it...
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'Nuff Said!
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Hal Jordan is not SUPPOSED to be a smarmy douche!!! Ryan Reynolds could maybe play Guy Gardner, but he's SO TOTALLY WRONG for Hal Jordan.
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I quite enjoyed Thor, but it was totally forgettable. X-Men: First Class was awful though. How that piece of crap got a free pass from the fanboy critics I have no idea. But throw in some superficial references to '60s Bond' (its nothing like a Bond film) and they all cream their jeans.
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He didn't write the script. He is an actor and he took a job. He did the best he could after other people made really bad decisions about the character.
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A movie that served no sense at all, and actually dictated to the audience where the lawyers came in and decided the course of the movie, not the Director? And also, where through the magic of shite FX, that Xavier looked for all in the world like a Corona fizzical bubble? And, and worst of all from the sound of it, that the lead didn't give a fucking shit what he was starring in? People forget, and I despair.
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Usually movies hated here do well with general audiences. I still have no idea why TF2 made money. Hands down the worst movie ever made. People here hate GL bet regular audiences eat it up.
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June 16, 2011, 2:41 p.m. CST
wickedjacob: Yabbut, if there was a good script and he was still cast as Hal Jordan...
by Royston Lodge
...he STILL would have been wrong for the role. Look, I don't dislike Ryan Reynolds entirely, but I do not believe for a second that he could ever convincingly play Hal Jordan, regardless of the quality of the script. Casting matters.
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Saw the full trailer in the theater and was trying to imagine how what I saw could sustain a 90 minute movie.
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ALL CG looks like shit. I don't care what anyone says. It all looks bad. Even in AVATAR the Navi looked like video game characters. CG needs to stop NOW. It has done NOTHING to help movies.
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You'd think they'd've caught on to him pretty early, esp. Hal. "You know guys, I'm not sure I trust a guy named Sinestro. Am I right? I mean what's the deal with that?" ... "Quiet, poozer!"
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I always thought he (and Aquaman) always get a lot of undeserved shit from hipster fanboys. I mean, there are superheroes named "Whizzer" and "The Gay Ghost". Give those guys the crappy treatment.
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Think of all the movies that have made use of CG in ways so subtle that you don't even notice them. For example, period dramas that use CG to edit out modern buildings from a European cityscape (I'm thinking of The Red Violin on this one, but there are many other examples). I'm also thinking about the first time I saw Jurassic Park, or Apollo 13, and I was blown away. I think the distinction is movies that WANT you to notice the CG because they think it's so damned cool, vs. movies that use CG to solve a problem without drawing your attention to it. I mean really, how many movies out there are made without ANY CG. Even romantic comedies use it a little to solve problems or fix little mistakes.
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When we were first shown clips of Gollum in FOTR some fanboys fought over whether it was a guy in makeup or cgi. That's good cgi!
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That said, cgi can be effective. Certain things look great done in cgi particularly when combined with practical effects like the shiny metal Destroyer in Thor.
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As if any of you know-it-all ass hats could tell from the trailers that the storyline was going suck. Who do you think you are, fucking Nerdstradomus.
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Does that help you understand it? Thor AND First Class were great examples of the genre. I especially can't understand how anyone could be disappointed by "Thor." What a great fucking movie. So sick of the joyless buffoonery that pervades this site.
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for reals.
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That goes for comic book movies and the comics that inspire them. Everyone knows this, so predicting failure only shows that you have a firm grasp of the obvious. I am, like, so impressed.
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If it ain't Scottish.
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...be up to me decide. A couple reviews from this site can hurt the box office. I was thinking this was going to be a bad flick. Now I am wondering how? This movie looks like it has CGI all over the place (not a bad thing in my taste. why would it be?). A good cast. And of course the Green Lantern legend itself. I am confused. You said that the visualizations of the Corps is great, the crazy beings that fill the ranks of the Corps. The main villain, Parallax. You even said that Reynolds, the major star in the movie is likable. Quint, you said there were some good elements? But its hard for me to see how this is not most of the movie.
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so youre saying, the best way to do a superhero movie is put all the effort into the two main characters and none into anyone else? Xavier and Magneto were well fleshed out, I loved Michael Fassbender as Magneto, but everyone else in the movie, save for Mystique and maybe Beast was poorly handled. Xavier's team could have easily been any random group of mutants. Same with Shaw and his group. Hell I dont even remember if Shaw's 3rd henchman was even referred to by name. Even Shaw could have been anyone. Kevin Bacon could have been playing a made up villain. And the cuban missile crisis sub plot was nonsense, id like to see any one try to argue that it wasnt. I didnt hate Thor, it was just kinda meh for me. I loved Tom Hiddleton as Loki, and the Frost Giants battle. My problem is Loki didnt seem to be a threat to Earth. He was focused on taking over Midgard. Which brings me to the point, why have any of it set on Earth? A lot of the movie just seemed pointless to me, and Natalie Portman's character felt forced.
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GL fucking theaters with a big green energy dick.
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June 16, 2011, 4:09 p.m. CST
Please, Dear Merciful God let this be the end of Mister self-aware hipster dialogue delivery's career
by Ted Knight
Not kidding! Everytime I look at his close set eyed face dismissively reciting his lines I want to go out into the night and snap a neck or two
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Didn't the just film the miniseries Emerald Dawn??? It'd make a great film and would save the corps for the second movie.
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Ignorant, heavily biased blanket statements of that nature mean nothing at all. Avatar was SEAMLESS. Claiming it looked like a video game, in cold defiance of reality, is a litmus test for idiocy as far as I'm concerned. And then there's the great CGI work in LOTR, T2, Jurassic Park, etc, etc. hell, even in a mediocre film like Pirates 2. Behave yourselves. That goes for you, too, faux-Choppah. Thor was nothing special. You're the 'arrogant' one, aren't you? Fuck...I can never keep track of all you chopping bastards.
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June 16, 2011, 4:34 p.m. CST
That said, the CGI in Green Lantern looks very poor...
by Turd_Has_Risen_From_The_Gravy
But the biggest deficiencies will be with the script and direction and performances. That's what really counts. And a universe like that could not be created without the use of CGI. It just has to be GOOD CGI (a la Avatar). Now, enough embarrassing emotional outburts from geek simpletons. CHOPPED
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You believe in any way, shape, or form that Thor learned his lesson in the Thor film? I have not seen GL yet, so it may be worse overall, but as far as character growth or redemption, there is absolutely no character development in the Thor film, which no one with a brain would give more than 2.5 stars.
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Trailing along behind your little internet masters, unable to formulate a valid opinion of your own, so eager to proclaim that everything sucks to distract yourselves from how badly most of your lives suck. And yes, please, stop with the "toldja so" posts. None of you have actually SEEN the movie. One man's opinion on a website hardly deems a movie "definitely crap." And you people wonder why us nerds get the shit kicked out of us? Baseless condescension tends to be a beating-magnet. Hell, at least Quint has actually SEEN the flick, and has an actual opinion of his own. You people are all just sheep. Though I suppose it was silly of me to expect anything less from the talkbacks of this website. Ugh. Color me disgusted with every single one of you.
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That all of the elements of a good movie were present, but nothing connected together. From what Quint's saying, it sounds as if there's no throughline to this film, no real plot structure. Stuff just happens. If Quint is correct, then it sounds as if those good elements just aren't connected together in a way to form one whole good film.
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June 16, 2011, 5:24 p.m. CST
Where DEFUCK is Harold Throckmorton Knowles IV's review of GREEN LANTERN?
by THE_CHOPPAH
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Shitty story->check CGI effect straight out of a Syfi movie of the week ->check Boring as hell out dated character, Hal Jordan-> check.
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Oh wait, you guys are legit, that's why the site got Hacked. lol
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http://www.darkhorizons.com/features/1581/what-re-the-most-acclaimed-comic-book-films
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How, exactly, do any of you personally know that the story was shitty? Have you seen the movie? Did you write the movie? Nope. You didn't. I'm not saying that this movie will be awesome and glorious, only that it FUCKING PISSES ME OFF to see you people deciding that a movie "sucks" with absolutely no knowledge of it yourselves. I just really gets to me that people who claim to be SO intelligent automatically give up their ability to formulate their own opinion. Because you wanna be one of the cool kids, that hates on everything to prove how amazingly refined your cinematic tastes are. Ugh. Hell, it's one thing to say "Well, I trust Quint's opinion, and I usually agree with his reviews, so maybe I won't like this movie," but to say "GREEN LANTERN IS A BAD MOVIE," unequivocally, as if it's fact rather than opinion shows, in my mind at least, a lack of intelligence. I, personally, will reserve my opinion until I actually SEE the goddamn flick. That's what Quint did, that's what any REAL movie fan would do.
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Who needs a good script when there's CGI!!
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You don't have the range to play both Deadpool and Hal Jordan. Nobody has that kind of range. You were arrogant and should have held out for the Flash instead.
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<p>They aren't. Maybe the first draft of Green Lantern was good or even great and they fired the writer(s) and brought it another one, who made it better or worse. Then they got fired and brought in another writer or team and they kept changing things until they had to shoot whatever they had, for better or worse. Or maybe the first draft was garbage and it got better or worse as they went through writers--not counting uncredited writers, script doctors and rewrites on set. Not to mention actor demands, director demands, producer demands, studio demands, etc. On and on. And people wonder why there are so many names in the screenwriting credits. I'm not saying that's how it happened for Green Lantern, but it seemed like it.<.p> <p>And some people can benefit from crap films. Like a new studio head. If he comes in after GL flops, he can point to his predecessor and say it was all the other guy's fault and make himself look better in the process. Or a studio can get an actor for less money because his last movie tanked. One man's failure can be another man's success.</p> <p>Look at Superman Reborn and imagine how awful it would have been if Jon Peters ideas had been realized: no Superman suit, no flying and Supes has to fight a giant spider in the third act.</p> <p>And people wonder why Hollywood films are such shit nowadays. Look at what writers have to deal with.</p>
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Now I'm never going to get my Black Canary flick. I see a reboot a-coming...
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25 films about a twee teenager's attempts to impress another twee teenager through the use of art or music. Thinking that indie films are better just because they are indie is sooooo 1993.
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You would end up with 25 films about a quirky teen trying to impress another quirky teen.
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...can we be dispensed of all these shitty CGBarf ridden adds now and get at least a breather until the next 38 or so pyjama clad flying supertwit movies media barrage? Thank you.
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...from the network that gave us Smallville, and made Tom Welling a "star"? Green Lantern was destined to be crap.
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The arc is a very familiar one… a swaggering asshole learns humility and compassion in 105 minutes. Unfortunately other than Reynolds’ inherent likeability we see Jordan go from smarmy douche (who parks like a dickhead, apparently) to heroic world-saver in a blink of an eye.
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June 17, 2011, 12:09 a.m. CST
This movie is EXACTLY as it should be, given the source.
by Bob Cryptonight
You nerds don't get that what you love about the comics & the character is manufactured in your own brain, and you ALLOW for all of the silliness to pass through your sense logic and dignity and you replace all that with a deep love of superheroes and--admit it--wanting to BE as superhero. But superheroes are mostly just deeply, deeply silly concepts. No matter how DARK your make them, they are still highly silly. I love The Return of The Dark Knight---but for chrissakes, it's silly and campy and, yes, dark, but ultimately just a jolly good time with over-the-top-characters. WATCHMEN is cool for what it is...but it's still guys in long underwear fighting crime. THE GREEN LANTERN is preposterous. That's fine with me, and I enjoy the comics...but I don't think a decent movie can be made. I mean--- THE GUY WEARS A SILLY GREEN MASK ON HIS FACE!!!!! Wake up!!!
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Yes, you are right. The thing is, you can embrace the idea that there is a silliness to the concept, as Thor did, and have a good enjoyable movie, or you can try to hide it, apologize for it, etc. and wind up with shit. I don't know what they did here for GL, but obviously people are not liking it, so something is wrong with the film, and it's not the GL silly elements that did it, it's apparently poor filmmaking. No matter the subject, a movie can be good or bad. So you need to "wake up"!
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June 17, 2011, 4:12 a.m. CST
To those going on about how the budget for this movie could have been used to make 25 indie flicks?
by AdamDiran
I'll take a green lantern movie over 25 "gay cowboys eating pudding" movies any day. Unles sthe movies were going to be "moon" at which point... Dang!
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I dont´want this movie to suck, but it looks like a sucker.
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June 17, 2011, 4:48 a.m. CST
ON A SIDE NOTE, I GUESS THE SUPERMAN 2012 MOVIE WILL NOT HAVE HIM IN RED TRUNKS SINCE I HEARD ON KIMMEL HE'S LOSING THEM LATER THIS YEAR
by Meadowe
personally I think it's about time; the bright red and blue and no mask I understand, so people can look at Clark and trust him, but the drawers on the outside of the blue tights never did float my boat.
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So, you'll see a sequel in a few years, despite the bad reviews. Because money talks and because we have 3 Narnia movies for some reason.
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The hell with fantasy movies. Lets just broadcast murder, destruction and rapine direct from Darfar.
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June 17, 2011, 11:05 a.m. CST
genderblender, if god didn't want us to use our imagination why do we have it?
by THAT_SAID_THE_CHOPPAH
I'm sure you're an atheist. But, still why did we evolve with imaginations? Surely, not just to figure out better ways to make more and more money speculating on the stock market?
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Quint, were you really "pissed?" I've been very mad several times in my day but I'm not sure it's ever coincided with walking out of a movie theatre. I think this hyperbole is only feeding an internet mentality that (where it meets movies) is out of control. I'm starting to think that internet movie reviewing/commenting could successfully borrow from Siskel and Ebert and go with "Shit" or "Piss" instead of thumbs up or down, since we generally only operate in levels of disappointment anymore collectively.
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leave martin campbell out of this. its not his fault he had to work with the most unlikeabe actor since ben affleck.
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NO MONEY, NO MONEY, NO MONEY
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I hope they don't create a movie of Deadpool. But, then again they might get sued for superhero movies before they can get to anti hero's.
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Green Lantern was great. GO SEE IT! Read Harry's review! GO SEE IT AGAIN!
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