Movie News

Behold Momoa As CONAN THE BARBARIAN In This New Trailer!!

Published at: May 4, 2011, 6:57 p.m. CST

Merrick here...

On the way out the door but wanted to make sure this got posted.  Our first full trailer for Marcus Nispel's CONAN: THE BARBARIAN movie, starring Jason Momoa (STARGATE ATLANTIS and GAME OF THRONES) in the title role. 

HD of the same can be found over at Yahoo, HERE

 

Still unsure about Momoa, but I kinda like the horse-vs-chain action at 1:18.  Please note that Conan's legend is "rising", along with all the other "rising" that's been going on in titles and advertising lately. 

 

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Readers Talkback

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  • May 4, 2011, 6:59 p.m. CST

    Looks like shit.

    by Flip63Hole

    And I haven't even watched the trailer. I'll wait for the talkback forum to give me an opinion...

  • May 4, 2011, 7:01 p.m. CST

    Jackie Cooper Just Died...

    by The Dreaded Rear Admiral

    You know, youngest nominee for Best Picture Oscar, was in the Our Gang comedies, played Perry Mason...pretty much one of the last surviving Our Gang kids. Hope there's a timely obit for him. Looking back, he WAS worthy of one here.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:02 p.m. CST

    Ugh

    by ThePorkChopExpress

    Looks ordinary. Also, hate American accents in these things.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:03 p.m. CST

    Not Arnold, but what is

    by Sean

    Looks like fun, saw a handful of raw Frazetta moments in there and it generally looked pretty stunning. Momoa's done a lot without saying much on GoT so far, so I'm not gonna so quick to write this one off. Gonna actually see it first.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:04 p.m. CST

    Meh

    by Duchess

    Looks pretty uninspired

  • May 4, 2011, 7:04 p.m. CST

    Rachel Nichols better get naked in this

    by DynamixRo

  • May 4, 2011, 7:04 p.m. CST

    Better than I expected

    by PedroM

    which was DTV quality, but still not excited to even go see it - from a Robert E Howard's Conan stories reader.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:04 p.m. CST

    Actually better than my worst fears...

    by d wilhelmy

    Who knows? Maybe it will be watchable.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:05 p.m. CST

    "In a world" has been replaced with "will rise"

    by Meinert Hansen

    Have you noticed that lately? Oh, and this guy looks a lot like Frazetta's Conan

  • May 4, 2011, 7:05 p.m. CST

    Next!

    by Dark Knight Lite

    Sorry, no Crown of Aqualonia for you.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:05 p.m. CST

    Mamoa is too cute and not big enough

    by daveyf

    He looks like a smallish barbarian compared to the Austrian Oak. But it looks decent.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:06 p.m. CST

    Not too shabby

    by chris

    Hues closely to the Conan comics from the 80s, good and gritty.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:08 p.m. CST

    I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

    by Prydie

    That looked fucking awful. Perhaps the only good to come out of this will be a blu-ray release of John Milius' version to cash in on this probable abortion.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:08 p.m. CST

    Is that the dude from Avatar as the baddie?

    by xevoid

  • May 4, 2011, 7:09 p.m. CST

    So is Rose McGowan playing a Member of the Bene Gesserit?

    by Shut the Fuck up Donny

    Look at that forehead!

  • May 4, 2011, 7:11 p.m. CST

    looks like clash of the titans

    by PHVCKO

  • May 4, 2011, 7:12 p.m. CST

    This summer...only ONE repetetive canned scream will reign supreme...

    by Shut the Fuck up Donny

    NYEEEARRRGHHHH!

  • May 4, 2011, 7:14 p.m. CST

    Looks good. Too bad most of you morons never read the books...

    by deathblow64

    Arnold is NOT Conan. Mamoa looks way more like Conan than Arny ever could. This may not be perfect, but I am sure it's a lot closer to the books than the first movies were.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:15 p.m. CST

    repetitive, damn it...

    by Shut the Fuck up Donny

    No edit function? NYEEEARRRGHHH...

  • May 4, 2011, 7:15 p.m. CST

    CGI better then I expected... But a little over the top?

    by wonderboy2402

    I was hoping for more of a gritty 13th warrior vibe then actiony 300/Clash of the Titans. Still nice to see they threw a bone towards Lovecraft and Howard's professionally relationship with inclusion of the "old ones."

  • May 4, 2011, 7:15 p.m. CST

    Looks better than I expected it to.

    by fanboy71

    I might actually see this in theaters. It helps that the lead can now add Game of Thrones to his resume instead of just Stargate.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:16 p.m. CST

    CLASH OF THE 300 PRINCES OF PERSIA!!!

    by golden tribw

    argh

  • I just hope the direction isn't quick-cut shakeycam crap. I like me giant serpentine beasties and sand demons if they're done halfway decently, so let's all just cross our fingers this isn't as much of a mess as TITANS was.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:19 p.m. CST

    By August, I'll be too burned out to watch this

    by 3D-Man

  • Honestly, the look of it was much nicer than Clash of the Titans.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:23 p.m. CST

    A great looking Conan movie with no Conan in it

    by quantize

    ....everytime his face is on camera

  • May 4, 2011, 7:25 p.m. CST

    Straight to VHS

    by Richie

    Half of the trailer was black. Why? Because if they held on any shot long enough we'd see it's badly shot, poorly lit crap. Conan my arse

  • Its really is a dry well out there isn't it ...... but hey, If its as good as Fast 5 then we should all be fucking happy.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:26 p.m. CST

    I miss these type of sword 'n sorcery blood orgies.

    by fustfick

    Hell, I went to see "Your Highness" twice in the theater. And loved it. Even though that "Conan" trailer looks like ass, I'm encouraged by glimpses of monsters and babes and I really can't wait for this shit. Let's just hope the screen is painted red...WITH BLOOD.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:26 p.m. CST

    Yes much better than expected

    by kafka07

    I actually feel a bit optimistic now. Also after seeing Momoa in Game of Thrones lately, he's growing on me.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:27 p.m. CST

    Wow

    by kwisatzhaderach

    This looks fucking terrible. But what do you expect when you replae the writer of Apocalypse Now and the writer-director of Big Wednesday and The Wind and the Lion with the director of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Remake, the Friday the 13th Remake and Pathfinder. Also Momoa's face looks like a piece of shit.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:27 p.m. CST

    Call me a racist, but

    by sweeneydave

    I prefer my Conan austrian.

  • it all looks like a video game...

  • May 4, 2011, 7:29 p.m. CST

    I'm not really sure what the argument for this looking awful is.

    by IndustryKiller!

    So far it actually looks fairly well done. Great sense of scope at the very least and on a technical level I found more to like than not. I don't know if I'm "sold" on Mamoa yet, but thus far I'm alot more impressed than I expected to be. He's got the voice down. We'll see if he can bring that primal savagery to it.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:30 p.m. CST

    I've read all of Robert E. Howards Conan works...

    by AnakinsDiapers

    and a great deal of other authors take on the character. <p> No, Arnolds monosyllabic lout was not a good translation, but neither does it seem like this one will be. <P> Conan was not somoan. He was always described as being burned by the sun (tanned), straight black hair, and smoldering blue eyes. He was also almost always described as being a head taller than the tallest man around. Conan was a northerner, not an islander.<p> I don't know. Other than using terms like Hyperborea and calling the guy Conan, i'm not getting anything "Conan" out of the trailers.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:32 p.m. CST

    Well it certainly looks BIGGER than expected

    by MoffatBabies

    don't know about better.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:33 p.m. CST

    "But I am sure it's a lot closer to the books than the first movies were."

    by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    Really? Where did you buy your crystal ball, moron? Looks like ass. And it's funny how people can say that this seems to resemble the BOOKS more than the Arnold movie. How can you tell that from a shitty trailer?

  • May 4, 2011, 7:33 p.m. CST

    "I'm not really sure what the argument for this looking awful is"

    by GINGE_MUPPET

    Because we are all jaded and tired of this remake bullshit ... At best this will be decent, nothing more. Make a few quid then will hit DVD and Blu-ray about 6 weeks later. 18 months from now it will rot in the bargain bins for the same price as a comic book. Production line shit.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:35 p.m. CST

    The Scorpien King 3: conan rises

    by Wookie_1995

    and thats the vibe I got

  • May 4, 2011, 7:37 p.m. CST

    Hahahahahahahahahahahahhhah

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    Wait, let me stop laughing and watch the trailer.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:37 p.m. CST

    Looks like fun....

    by ZaphodBeeblerox

    I read all of the Howard pulp Conan stories growing up and loved them. In my mind, Momoa is closer to the literary Conan in appearance then Arnold was. I said 'Closer' not 'exact match' so dont start going off on that tangent. None of the stories were high art to be sure. Loots of boobs, blood and bashing going on with a fantasy tilt. If this delivers that, I'll consider it a success considering the star in the title role is someone most people dont know at all. I think it'll be worth a matinee viewing at the very least for me.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:37 p.m. CST

    Damn, that looks A LOT better than I expected.

    by Playkins

    I mean, it will be hard to beat the original, but it does look entertaining.<P> Doesn't look NEARLY as bad as that dreadful TV Series with Ralf "Tits" Moeller, and looks a fair sight better than "Destroyer".

  • May 4, 2011, 7:38 p.m. CST

    ginge_muppet

    by WhatTheHellHappenedToMe

    It's the internet. If you don't hate a movie you've never seen with all the vitriol you can muster, YOU'RE DOING IT FUCKING WRONG. YOUR COMMENT IS SUCH A PIECE OF SHIT WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE ASSHOLE WHO WROTE IT?

  • May 4, 2011, 7:38 p.m. CST

    eh, fair enough, ginge_muppet

    by IndustryKiller!

    I give it a little leeway though because it's based on source material that I think is fair game to explore. But I certainly can't say you're wrong.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:39 p.m. CST

    ginge_muppet=industrykiller!

    by WhatTheHellHappenedToMe

  • May 4, 2011, 7:40 p.m. CST

    "I'm not really sure what the argument for this looking awful is"

    by kwisatzhaderach

    Because it's directed by Marcus Nispel and we just saw the trailer which is appalling and looks like a slightly bigger budget episode of Xena or Hercules?

  • May 4, 2011, 7:43 p.m. CST

    "looks like a slightly bigger budget episode of Xena or Hercules"

    by WhatTheHellHappenedToMe

    And the original looked like Gone With The Wind? Get the fuck over yourselves. This looks like the best that can be done with such schlocky source material.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:44 p.m. CST

    "looks like a slightly bigger budget episode of Xena or Hercules?"

    by IndustryKiller!

    I don't have any faith in Nispel as a name, but that looked way beyond a fucking Xena episode. In fact I think that's an incredibly lazy criticism that could be thrown at even the grandest Conan production ever given that the source material is so similar. I'm not saying with any kind of conviction it's going to be great, but from a technical standpoint there is nothing there to hate and it has an inarguable sense of scope. And nothing about Mamoa screws the pooch off the bat.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:44 p.m. CST

    Well if they called it anything else...

    by Tom Fremgen

    Aside from Conan, and I'd be more excited about it. But the first Conan movie was epic. Aside from the Lord of the Rings (which was a completely different style), nothing has really matched it. So just like Green Lantern, I'll go see it, but I'm worried.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:45 p.m. CST

    Looks less charismatic than Kevin Sorbo.

    by JuanSanchez

  • May 4, 2011, 7:45 p.m. CST

    Oh - and I the only one who feels sorry for Rose McGowan?

    by JuanSanchez

  • May 4, 2011, 7:45 p.m. CST

    Looks okay, but I'm screaming for Poledouris' score

    by darthderp

    Dear god, please tell me that crappy rock track was only for the trailer...

  • May 4, 2011, 7:45 p.m. CST

    I've read Howard's stories...

    by Prydie

    ...and besides not having black hair I thought Arnold was pretty damn fine casting. Here is Howard's description of Conan in 'The Tower of the Elephant': "...a tall, strongly made youth standing beside him. This person was as much out of place in that den as a gray wolf among mangy rats of the gutters. His cheap tunic could not conceal the hard, rangy lines of his powerful frame, the broad heavy shoulders, the massive chest, lean waist and heavy arms. His skin was brown from outland suns, his eyes blue and smoldering; a shock of tousled black hair crowned his broad forehead." Sounds like the Austrian Oak to me. Adjectives like "...tall, strongly made... ...broad heavy shoulders... ...massive chest... ...heavy arms" seem to invoke a fucking big guy and not the wiry little dude so-called Howard purists demand.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:46 p.m. CST

    I don't have time for ams.

    by JuanSanchez

  • May 4, 2011, 7:47 p.m. CST

    The original also had amazing music!

    by Tom Fremgen

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1XmZ9_ckdw

  • May 4, 2011, 7:48 p.m. CST

    Not as bad as expected

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    Definitely will check it out when it hits DVD. Momoa even looks better in the context of the actual film. I don't know about the action scenes though. They look a bit ordinary. The snakes in the water don't look cool or original. His swordfight opponents don't look very exciting, either. Hopefully there's some villains/creatures not shown in this trailer, lol.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:48 p.m. CST

    Momoa

    by antmanx68

    Looks awesome, I'm a bit worried about the villains though. Some of their costumes and weapons are questionable. No concerns about the star though. I think he'll sell it and if people can get Arnold off the brain they'll see this guy really fits the bill.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:48 p.m. CST

    MOMOA'S ASS IS BAD TO THE Nth POWER

    by BSB

    Me want see Conan kill. Trailer makes me ass in seat.

  • May 4, 2011, 7:49 p.m. CST

    On Release Day

    by hayt43

    I suggest watching the One and Only Conan

  • May 4, 2011, 7:50 p.m. CST

    Please answer this question......

    by Fritzlorrerains

    Why the hell did they cast Conan with a skinny ass bitch?!! It looked like it could have been halfway decent if they didn't make Conan freaking EMO! I'll be skipping this travesty!

  • May 4, 2011, 7:52 p.m. CST

    Seriously... This is the original trailer

    by WhatTheHellHappenedToMe

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCd7MA1w9qg

  • May 4, 2011, 7:58 p.m. CST

    Τhe fuck is this shit?

    by KilliK

    this looks terrible,really terrible.sigh...

  • May 4, 2011, 7:58 p.m. CST

    Ok, what we see here, is...

    by carlinesque_thinktank

    ...a terrible accident between 300, the scorpion king, the mummy and instead of brendan fraser, a bad (and I never thought, this could be possible) and uglier version of arnold schwarzenegger. Holy fuckin' jumpin' jesus...

  • May 4, 2011, 8:02 p.m. CST

    C'mon man.

    by Norman Colson

    Jason momoa put it down in stargate atlantis. im sure this movie will be his ticket into the mainstream. and it will do well. not blockbuster but very well... we dont get many fantasy movies on screen nowadays, i mean LOTR is the only one that comes to mind. we need more shit like that.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:02 p.m. CST

    Needs R rating to be relevant

    by Phategod100

  • May 4, 2011, 8:04 p.m. CST

    This is the first remake/reboot I actually want to see

    by frankenstone

    Nobody could ever top Basil Poledouris' score in a million years. But I think I would actually kind of like the idea of a 1970's-style hard-rock/heavy-metal score. The kind of music I imagined that the animated Heavy Metal movie would have. I doubt they would go that way though.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:05 p.m. CST

    Stinks to high heaven.

    by jonsnow

    Good grief, Sean Bean looks more like the part than this moman. Poor Sorbo(someone mentioned him) sadly, even would be a much better choice. Whoever did the casting should be fired. Ralf Möller would have done justice to the part, the tv show was much better.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:06 p.m. CST

    Wow... Conana looks a lot different since he shaved off his beard

    by Inexplicable_Nuclear_Balls

    Was Andy Richter also in the trailer? I must've missed him.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:06 p.m. CST

    Looking better

    by Hipshot

    Read all the Conan novels, and the first 100 or so Marvel comics. This guy looks as much like Conan as Arnold did. Not as much charisma. Probably a better actor. Not as big (of course), but definitely lither, which counts for a lot with edged weapons. FX better, of course. Might work.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:07 p.m. CST

    And I fuck up my own joke by adding an extra "a"

    by Inexplicable_Nuclear_Balls

    Should've just called him Coco.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:13 p.m. CST

    actually looks decent

    by Jodie

    some very nice production design in there, and the CGI seemed seamless and sparingly used. At any rate, looks MUCH better than the Green Lantern trailer, and who would have predicted that??

  • May 4, 2011, 8:13 p.m. CST

    Phategod100 is correct....

    by Fritzlorrerains

    If it isn't R it is worthless.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:14 p.m. CST

    Why are you comparing it to Arnold's Conan?

    by fanboy71

    Would you rather see a flabby old man in the role? The original came out 29 years ago, and even though I was only 10 at the time, I had no idea who Arnold was before walking into the theater. Looking back on it now, the guy can barely speak english. And the only reason he was hired was his muscles. Most guys now days shy away from steroids, unlike Arnold back in the day, so most are not going to be as big as he was. I'd rather have a guy who can act than a guy who is as big as Arnold was. The new guy had more lines in that trailer than Arnold did in the whole first film. It seems some of you are letting nostalgia for your childhood cloud your judgement on what makes a good lead actor. And Conan the Destroyer was laughably bad, so this can't be any worse than that.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:15 p.m. CST

    Momoa doesn't have the guns or the right look to be Conan

    by vorlonkosh

    If this was "Momoa the Barbarian" it wouldn't have to deal with any preconceptions.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:15 p.m. CST

    It doesn't look like 300

    by rev_skarekroe

    Got to give it that.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:19 p.m. CST

    the_dreaded_rear_admiral

    by darthSaul666

    Perry Mason was played by Raymond Burr.. Not Jackie Cooper.....

  • Well done on totally missing the point as to why Arnie was given so many leading roles in his prime. We all know he can't fucking act ... Jim Cameron knows he can't fucking act.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:25 p.m. CST

    turd_has_risen_from_the_gravy

    by GINGE_MUPPET

    Well said.

  • Yeah I know there was talk, but there's talk about a lot of things. I would have really liked that too, Turd, but some INSANELY specific circumstances would have had to occur and I'm not sure any of us could have reasonably expected it.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:25 p.m. CST

    I didn't see him punch a camel, so I'm not sold

    by Citizin_insane

  • May 4, 2011, 8:27 p.m. CST

    Fairly awful

    by Badger23

  • May 4, 2011, 8:30 p.m. CST

    Looks good to me

    by BuffDaddy

    I like Conan so I'm happy regardless. It looks a lot better than the lord of the rings. lord of rings was ok but it was for nerdy white boys. times have changed.

  • Minus the super long hair and crazy eye-liner/shadow (not really sure which does what). Pretty much what I'm trying to say is Conan should have a beard.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:31 p.m. CST

    "The Oak will get back into terrific shape in record time"

    by fanboy71

    lol. Not without 60 million dollars worth of CGI. After a certain point, there's just no going back. And Arnold was juiced up on steroids when he made the first Conan, so why take shots at Stallone for using HGH, which is legal? Arnold will never again look as good as Stallone does at 60. You can piss and moan all night about it not being Arnold in the role, but it's never going to happen, so take what you can get, or just don't see it.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:34 p.m. CST

    looks decent, but...

    by IKilledSuperman

    ...too much visible CGI. Pathfinder was terrible, but looked physically grounded.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:35 p.m. CST

    I'd Much Rather Have King Conan, But At Least...

    by Acquanetta

    ...it looks like they put some effort into this. After the teaser, I was expecting something along the lines of Kull the Conqueror, Bloodrayne, or Underworld: Rise of the Lycans. This film's main problem is that it's coming along at a time that everyone hates cgi- especially in older franchises. Yeah, we've seen this kind of thing before in movies like Scorpion King or Prince of Persia, but you also have to ask how much those films stole from Conan and his pulp origins in the first place. Ultimately, that's probably what the real test for a Conan film should be: Does it evoke an old-fashioned spirit of pulp? I'm still not completely sold on Momoa as Conan or the film, but at least it looks like it's aiming for the right tone. As long as the story isn't a complete shambles, I can usually forgive cgi ambitions that exceed the budget.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:35 p.m. CST

    Blind Arnie fans, this looks way better than those old movies!

    by CeejayNightwing

    For a start Arnie was never tall enough for Conan with his 5'8 teeny frame and he was slow when fighting with his telegraphed choreography and his terrible acting that portrayed a "dumb-brute" version of Conan that was never the character from the books. Arnie never even got close to black hair or a decent tan for the part but Arnie fans being what they are like deaf, dumb and stupid when it comes to assessing anything he does in comparison to what it should be especially with that ridiculous Austrian accent. This guy looks the part, tall (6,4), big, tanned, black haired and his eyes do more acting as a cunning, lethal warrior than Arnie ever got across with his gaunt-less face! He moves far smoother than Arnie and the settings in this film look like proper fantasy world unlike Arnie's versions. For those that want foam rubber, badly animated animatronic creatures like in those terrible Arnie films, PLEASE GO BACK AND DIE IN THE 1980'S with that crap! CGi is a gazillion times better tool than animatronics and stop-motion picture. The creatures in this movie look way more convincing than any of the lifeless props from Arnies versions. This will make more money in one week than both Arnie films did in their entire run, despite the boycott of these dumb ass Arnie fans and their misguided "everything I know of Conan I learned from Arnold Scwarzenegger and Marvel Comics"

  • May 4, 2011, 8:36 p.m. CST

    "It looks a lot better than the lord of the rings"

    by GINGE_MUPPET

    Fuck me .... That quote could go on the poster! ..... Might sell another 15 tickets or so.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:37 p.m. CST

    It looked alot better than lotr??? he's joking right?

    by Norman Colson

    Dude, you on crack or something. I mean the original conan was good for it's time, but damn lotr was epic and it's not just for white nerdy guys there was plenty of black people in the theater when i went too... lol.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:37 p.m. CST

    Too bad about Rachel Nichols and Rose McGowan...

    by Grasscutter

    because they both suck. And to the guy who says he hopes Nichols gets naked in this: nope. It's in her contracts. She won't even do wet-tshirt type stuff.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:39 p.m. CST

    ceejaynightwing

    by GINGE_MUPPET

    You sound like a 10 year old kid who had too much sugar at his Birthday party .... "5'8 teeny frame" , fucking laughable.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:39 p.m. CST

    now THIS is more like it!

    by THE TRUE PINBACK

    I was somewhat skeptical after the first teaser, but now I am am looking forward to CONAN a LOT!!! This looks like the kind of balls-to-the-wall film that it should be. And please...all you devotees of the Arnold CONAN films...PLEASE stop bitching. The Governator will never play Conan again, so get over it. This guy looks the part, and he isn't hard to understand either. Momoa isn't from the Frazetta mold, but so what. He DOES remind me of the early Marvel-Barry Smith CONAN. Shut up...wait till August...and give this film a fighting chance. After seeing this trailer, I think we will all be pleasantly surprised.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:46 p.m. CST

    I don't want an EMO Conan

    by Fritzlorrerains

    If you thought this crap looks good you need help. Conan is a skinny wimpy punk!

  • May 4, 2011, 8:47 p.m. CST

    This looks fun, that's all I need

    by Player01

    Seriously, some of you are taking this WAY too seriously. It looks like a fun hour and a half, it's just a movie. That's all I need. I'll see this. It could have been a lot fucking worse.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:48 p.m. CST

    Yeah about what I expected in a movie from 2011.

    by Orionsangels

  • May 4, 2011, 8:49 p.m. CST

    Well, it *looks* okay

    by D.Vader

    By that, I mean, I certainly don't have a big problem with the *look* of the film. There are a few shots in there that look pretty cool and well composed. I wish everything had a bit of a grittier look to it, but ah well. I seriously dislike the director, but I may be in line for this movie when it comes out. Honestly, just the name "CONAN" is what is selling this for me. If the reviews are god-awful, I'll probably decline. But if they are mixed, I'll probably buy a ticket. We'll see what happens.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:52 p.m. CST

    Hm. Thought It would be worse than that.

    by thedottedlion

    Still not going to the theater, but I'll probably get the brd.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:56 p.m. CST

    I miss Schwarzenegger and Milius

    by D.Vader

  • May 4, 2011, 8:56 p.m. CST

    And MAKO

    by D.Vader

    Most badass uni-name ever.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:56 p.m. CST

    The Only Problem With Arnold As Conan...

    by Acquanetta

    ...is that he pretty much ran away from the role once The Terminator came along. Every few years you'd read that Conan 3 was trying to move forward, only to watch it fall apart because Arnold wasn't interested. I wanted King Conan over T3 and would still love to see it today, but the reality is that Arnold is a big reason we're even talking about some guy named Jason Momoa.

  • May 4, 2011, 8:58 p.m. CST

    MAMOA!

    by JackSlater4

    VAGINAS WILL DRIP!

  • May 4, 2011, 8:59 p.m. CST

    Hmmm...I liked everything I saw...except for the parts with Conan.

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    But something tells me that's not what they're going for.

  • May 4, 2011, 9 p.m. CST

    JuanSanchez, I feel sorry for Rose McGowan

    by D.Vader

    Its a shame she hasn't been able to get more parts since she lost her leg.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:01 p.m. CST

    DOCPAZUZU!

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    Get in here and lay the smackdown with your Conan knowledge!

  • May 4, 2011, 9:03 p.m. CST

    fuck you that's obviously a Conan movie

    by JackSlater4

  • May 4, 2011, 9:04 p.m. CST

    Hated the teaser, but...

    by KrowNinja

    This trailer is pretty damn awesome. I never would have dreamed the trailer would be this nice after that shitty teaser. Big difference.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:09 p.m. CST

    Holy shit...

    by GroolDemon

    That had to have been the cheesiest trailer I've seen for a major release in some time. Let's count the cheese and make a top ten list. 10 Multiple instances of I'll randomly swing my sword around and mug for the camera shot. 9 The LOL, I dodged your spear so I'll mug for the camera shot. 8 The mysterious prophetic old geezer voice over. 7 The ugly orc-looking mutant guy screaming at the sky shot. 6 Typical scripted lines like, "I will follow you to hell" or "BEHOLD... IN DESPAIR!" 5 The typical peasant or slave being whipped shot and screaming in pain shot. 4 The cruel overlord making the woman cry shot. 3 The mysterious creature pulling someone into the water shot. 2 Lightning, fire, lightning, fire, and more lightning and fire. 1 This is the worst mistake of all... MULTIPLE INSTANCES OF THE HOWIE LONG SCREAM. Honorable mentions: People running in terror. Jumping at the camera with a sword. Pointing stuff at the camera (fuck this is going to be in 3D isn't it?) Random sex scene shots The weird evil chick 3/4 pose whipping out a sword and hissing shot. Believe me, I had high hopes like the rest of you, but this looks like absolute watered down garbage. This flick is officially off my radar. All I can say is that Robert E Howard is probably rolling in his grave. One can only hope he crawls out, eats the cast after an epic sword fight, and puts and end to this shit.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:11 p.m. CST

    I saw a lot of stuff go by but somehow saw nothing.

    by blackmantis

    Flash and razmatazz but nothing held long enough to make an impression.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:13 p.m. CST

    I didn't hear a single Howie Long scream

    by D.Vader

    Then again... I guess I wasn't listening that intently.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:16 p.m. CST

    D. Vader

    by GroolDemon

    Go to the 0:50 mark. The other ones are faint under the main audio at random.

  • But there were only two shots in this entire trailer that could be qualified as "shakeycam", and both involved wide shots of men on horseback. Every other action scene was presented as being very steady and surprisingly fluid. So, if we're gonna insult this thing, let's at least do it right and not jump to unfounded conclusions.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:24 p.m. CST

    Oh THERE's the Howie Long scream!

    by D.Vader

    Okay. Well. It was kinda faint. Come on, they use it all the time in trailers =).

  • May 4, 2011, 9:25 p.m. CST

    The music from the trailer is as cliche at possible.

    by Orionsangels

    Wait didn't I hear that music in the Clash of the Titans remake trailer? Prince of Persia trailer? Oh who cares! This is the same soulless CGI piece of shit that Hollywood keep making.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:25 p.m. CST

    "if we're gonna insult this thing, let's at least do it right"

    by GINGE_MUPPET

    Indeed ... but lets face it, this thing fucking insults itself! ... Very little effort is needed on our part.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:27 p.m. CST

    Looks better than Thor, Cap A, & Green Lantern...

    by codecrackx15

    ...the first trailer this year that really improved over previous ones. It does have a REH feel to ot from the books too.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:27 p.m. CST

    Re: We sort of did get a 'Conan 3'...

    by Acquanetta

    Ironically, it also ended up being one of the main things that stopped Conan 3 from happening in the 80s. Arnold was supposed to return to the role after Predator, but was unhappy with the way his name had been used to market and promote Red Sonja. By the time his contract expired, he was less motivated to rejoin forces with De Laurentiis. It's kind've funny to remember that Conan- and not Terminator- was once considered Arnold's big franchise. During interviews for Destroyer, Arnold even spoke about hoping to make 7 or 8 Conan films and that he could easily see himself still playing the role at age 70. Of course, then a few months later Terminator came along...

  • Just like poor old Sly Stallone, these guys were not tall, just musclebound. Idiots like you made them big in your minds every time the script described them as "big" and "Huge" when in fact they never grew past 6 foot! Never mind, keep the childhood myth alive for your own sake, the rest of us stopped being fooled by that one a long time ago!

  • May 4, 2011, 9:31 p.m. CST

    d.vader

    by GroolDemon

    Yeah, I know, but there is just something about it that I hate. Like, when you hear the Wilhelm scream it is like OH HA HA THE WILHELM SCREAM! But the Howie scream is just so over the fucking top that I can't take it seriously at all, even in a nostalgic way... Fuck I'm jaded.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:31 p.m. CST

    Momoa looks like a greasey haired transvestite

    by TheApostle

  • May 4, 2011, 9:34 p.m. CST

    CONIN!

    by Anklavepak

    ... She shouts at the end - so it seems Momoa is not Conan... even though he seems more true to the original Conan than Arnie. The images and action look passably pulpy, but I bet Tyler Bates is gonna ruin what's left of this one with his rock guitars and percussion laden mish mash soundscapes. Poledouris will be spinning in his grave.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:34 p.m. CST

    Why the fuck are they scoring the trailer with Nu Metal?!

    by blakindigo

    It didn't work with "Clash of the Titans" remake. It doesn't work here. FFS, they couldn't get a powerful, evocative orchestral score?! Dammit. Someone take this remove the M & E track and put the original Basil Poledouris score, just to see how that would work. Probably MUCH better, I suspect.

  • Its only when its used in actual movies do I roll my eyes and say "Jeebus Christo, wasn't there something else you could have used?!" At least the Wilhelm is often used in subtle ways, hidden amongst the rest of the sound effects in a particular scene. Its almost never isolated anymore, like when one person falls (like Howie Long). Its often used when multiple people are yelling and screaming (like in LOTR). So when I see a movie and ONE person is onscreen and you hear the Howie Long scream, I know they're just being lazy.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:36 p.m. CST

    Well, at least that was sort of a real trailer--

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    I liked the Lovecraftian tentacled creature, esspecially in the overhead shot. I'm not totally sold on Momoa yet, but he looks pissed. I guess I'd say it looks better than what I was expecting, but not as good as I could hope for.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:37 p.m. CST

    that looks fantastic!!

    by antonphd

    it looks like they nailed everything

  • May 4, 2011, 9:42 p.m. CST

    d.vader

    by GroolDemon

    Yeah, I'll give you that. It more than likely will be edited out in post because they haven't gotten around to it yet... maybe. Though, I agree, when you hear it with a single character on screen that is just fucking lazy editing. Especially if they aren't falling or flying by or something.

  • seeing as he's only 3' 6"

  • May 4, 2011, 9:49 p.m. CST

    I know what you're saying Turd, but...

    by D.Vader

    Watch it again and be really attentive, on the lookout for shakeycam like I was. You might be surprised how much of the action is actually pretty steady and easy to follow. Lots of slomo in there, yeah, but lots of other action that appears to be well staged. Note I'm not saying this will be good in the least. I think the director is terrible. But, for the most part, this doesn't *look* terrible (as far as looks are concerned).

  • May 4, 2011, 9:52 p.m. CST

    The Howie Long scream

    by D.Vader

    I think the first time I remember hearing it was during a "Next time on The X-Files" during the first season. In fact, I think it was the episode that involved some plants with killer spores or something.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:52 p.m. CST

    "Emasculated pussies of his generation..."

    by Hipshot

    Ah...tell that to The Rock, or Michael Jai White. Plenty of actual macho guys around.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:53 p.m. CST

    I think Frazetta would have approved of the look

    by Terrence

    This is about as close as they can get to what his interpretations look like via live action, and so far it's not horrible.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:54 p.m. CST

    Mamoa is far more like Conan than Arnold

    by GarethKeenan

    Arnold was not the Conan of Howard's books. He was far too naive, not savage enough, not feral enough, not agile enough. Mamoa at least looks like the Conan of the books. He's musclebound but not to the point that he can barely jump or leap around. He's savage looking and doesn't lumber around like Arnold; this guy can actually move. I see nothing to complain about with this trailer, and am mystified at the negative reactions.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:55 p.m. CST

    by the_shitweasel_with_a_quizzical_brow

    Too right, now it takes me out of the film! Even 'Paul' had it but wasn't surprised

  • May 4, 2011, 9:57 p.m. CST

    Was meant for This summer...only ONE repetetive canned scream will reign supreme...

    by the_shitweasel_with_a_quizzical_brow

    Was meant for This summer...only ONE repetetive canned scream will reign supreme... Too right, but now it takes me out of the film! Even 'Paul' had it but wasn't surprised.

  • May 4, 2011, 9:59 p.m. CST

    "Holy Shit" by grooldemon

    by GarethKeenan

    If you don't like the trailer, that's fine... but how is the stuff you describe not like REH's stories? I've read 'em all and it sure looks like REH's Conan to me...

  • May 4, 2011, 10:12 p.m. CST

    garethkeenan

    by fanboy71

    I agree. I just read in the trivia section of IMDB that Arnold has to change his workout during filming because his chest and arms were so big he couldn't even swing a sword.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:14 p.m. CST

    Best Thing I've Seen From This So Far Is...

    by Acquanetta

    ...this photo, which does a surprisingly good job of capturing a Frazetta-esque vibe. http://tinyurl.com/3nfgkb2 None of the other marketing has really hit the same mark for me, but it does provide a glimmer of hope that some of that tone will actually be present in the film.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:21 p.m. CST

    Looks Damn Retarded, BUT

    by Muldoon

    I'll still see it and hope to be blown away.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:23 p.m. CST

    Didn't know Howard was only 30 when he died

    by Terrence

    So he basically created Conan in his 20's, which is pretty cool.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:25 p.m. CST

    All that's missing is a laugh track...

    by MajorFrontbum

    ...to make this film, the ultimate summer comedy of 2011. Momoa's wig is hilarious and deserves a franchise all on it's own.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:31 p.m. CST

    Shit...

    by iamjacksenragedanus

    ...is what this movie will be. I don't understand the need to remake a movie just to try to cash in, oh wait, that's why they're done in the first place. This is going to be a joke.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:35 p.m. CST

    Nope.

    by ENIK REED

  • May 4, 2011, 10:46 p.m. CST

    Fuck Arnold and Milius

    by Half-Baked-Goggle-Box-Do-Gooder

    Their "Conan"s sucked shit. Conan was a whip-fast, cynical, smart-if-uneducated engine of destruction. Arnold was a lumbering dumbfuck lug who looked like he didn't know which end of a fucking sword to hold. Mind you, I ain't saying this is gonna be GREAT...Looks like too much CGI, too little story, too fucking BUSY. But this Momoa guy, whom I've never seen a frame of him in action before, looks shitloads more like Howard's idea of Conan than the guvuhnatuh ever hoped to - That's all.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:47 p.m. CST

    Looks far truer to Howards stories than Arnold

    by SmokingRobot

    Really. All the hate on this is just ridiculous. A fucking body-builder as Conan? No. I'd far rather have an actor.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:49 p.m. CST

    i like it

    by Omar B

    The look brings to mind Red Nails in the look of the laberynthine city. There is also a bit of Queen Of The Black Coast and The God In The Bowl. I am excited about this movie.

  • May 4, 2011, 10:53 p.m. CST

    He looks just like the REAL Conan

    by BrooklynBred

    Ahnuld was good but didn't look like him. This guy does. Give him a chance sheesh!

  • May 4, 2011, 10:54 p.m. CST

    EPIC TURD

    by CloneWars

  • I reckon an American accent is better for Conan than the Austrian - it is pulp after all...

  • May 4, 2011, 11:17 p.m. CST

    I'm no Conan afficianado, but the thing that bugs me...

    by dockealy

    Is the sterotypical martial arts style fighting I see here and...well in every other movie of it's ilk. There's even the requisite "matrix dodge" of flying sharp objects. I see not an ounce of originality on the screen. He needs to be fast and lethal not Jackie Chan antics.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:30 p.m. CST

    Looks Craptastic....

    by DeckardB26354

    There's nothing in here that looks any different from any other generic fantasy movie, just like the recently sucktastic "Clash Of The Titans". Also, there should never be love interests in Conan movies. Conan doesn't really give a fuck about love. This looks like a direct to video movie.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:37 p.m. CST

    Written and Directed by Uwe Boll

    by sardonia

    Starring Jeremy Irons as Conan's lover, putting fat loads up Conan's turd cutter.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:40 p.m. CST

    I think...

    by blackwood

    it's looking good. So far.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:42 p.m. CST

    So it looks like crap...

    by Gozu

    But it also kind of looks like fun crap. I mean, Jason Momoa isn't Schwarzenegger (or, from the looks of it, Conan), but it seems like a good movie to see at midnight after putting a few away.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:42 p.m. CST

    Conan and love

    by Anklavepak

    Conan's first and greatest love was Bêlit, Queen of the Black Coast. Of her love for Conan she said: "Were I still in death and you fighting for life, I would come back from the abyss to aid you — aye, whether my spirit floated from the purple sails on the crystal sea of paradise, or writhed in the molten flames of Hell! I am yours, and all the gods and their eternities shall not sever us!" Die she did, but kept her promise and her ghost came back from the dead and saved Conan's life on one occasion. She was one of the reasons for his "gigantic melancholies." Conan did indeed "Give a fuck" about a lot of things.

  • They need to include that RObot Chicken in the movie. Then maybe I'd see it.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:45 p.m. CST

    Where's the Wooly Mammoth....

    by D o o d

    you know, cause it looks like 10,000 BC!

  • May 4, 2011, 11:49 p.m. CST

    Couldn't be more depressing

    by Adam13

    Utterly despicable. Putrid.

  • May 4, 2011, 11:50 p.m. CST

    Robot Chicken SONG* :(

    by Robert

    http://video.adultswim.com/robot-chicken/what-is-best-in-life.html

  • Why do they have to use that same stupid heavy metal crap in these trailers too??

  • May 5, 2011, 12:15 a.m. CST

    Looks great!

    by Bob

    Obviously all of you Arnie loving / remake haters have never even read the damn books. That said, it's not the books, but it's closer than the original movie, which was nothing like it at all. Also, Arnie couldn't act for shit then. The amount of line overdubs in Conan were pretty obvious. You can tell when they happen, it's because Arnolds english at the time was terrible. At least Momoa is coherent. As for the rating. I'm hoping for an R, but am expecting a PG-13. There's a lot of stuff in the trailer that has some very obvious moments of bloody violence trimmed out, so I guess we will see what happens.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:18 a.m. CST

    Watched it 4 times

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    There's potentially a good movie in there that's overshadowed by a few cheesy scenes. But the villain looks really weak. So weak that he blends into the trailer and you're not quite sure who he is at first. But I will remain cautiously optimistic.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:29 a.m. CST

    I would rather see...

    by SHWIGGINSTEIN

    THIS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBGOQ7SsJrw

  • May 5, 2011, 12:30 a.m. CST

    Now it officially looks shitty

    by disfigurehead

    If i am not washing my clothes that day I might might see it.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:57 a.m. CST

    RESERVE YOUR JUDGEMENT

    by uberman

    This might be a good representation of CONAN. THis guy looks waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more like the Frazetta Conan than Arnie ever did. What Arnie had was the Conan ego/spirit. This new Conan is a very big, very menacing looking guy and he can be pretty imposing. I liked the Mileus Conan but it lacked the violence and intensity of the books, of which I have read all-the originals. This looks much more like that original vision than Arnies ever did. Hopefully it will have a strong story...

  • May 5, 2011, 12:59 a.m. CST

    Someone call the waaaaambulance!

    by Happyfat73

    Quick! Someone call the waaaambulance... a whiny talkbacker with entitlement issues just had a conniption because this isn't King Conan.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:04 a.m. CST

    News just in: butthurt epidemic plagues AICN talkback.

    by Happyfat73

    Authorities cite a 2-minute trailer for Conan the Barbarian as the cause of mass rectal prolapses among AICN's histrionic sissy population. </p> </p> Elsewhere, life goes on.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:16 a.m. CST

    The design looks more Brom than Frazetta,

    by Dennis_Moore

    particularly McGowan's character.

  • Because this could not POSSIBLY be an actual feature film, judging by the piece of flaming bullshit that I just watched. Seriously, I watched the original "Conan" the other night, and it totally holds up. This is Xena: Warrior Princess with the EXACT SAME "300" slo-mo bullshit shots that every other fucking movie's had for the last 5 years. EW.

  • Talk about a mishmash of shit for fuck sakes.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:25 a.m. CST

    It's in the ballpark, but sitting in the cheap seats.

    by kevred

    Superficially, a lot of it is there, or close. But something just feels off about the whole thing. As though CG has been overused, and none of it feels real enough. None of it is gritty enough, with all the camera effects, fake coloring, cliched fighting moves (must everyone fight the same way in all movies now?), and some of the least-compelling (at first glance) villains in recent memory. I liked Momoa enough until he spoke - one quick little line, admittedly, but it lacked gravity or the important Conan 'animal' quality. I am judging a trailer, not the film, of course. But this looks like it has some aspects of the stories nailed down, but is trying way too hard to look like everything else you've already seen. If it has potential but fails because of CG shortcuts and cliched pandering, that will really be too bad. And remind me why they couldn't have used an actual Howard story for this, again? We all know they're better than anything Hollywood can produce today.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:28 a.m. CST

    @happyfat, the fallacy of your complaints

    by kevred

    So the point you're trying so hard to make is that only happy, uplifting thoughts can be voiced here? No critiques, complaints, or cutting analysis? If that's the case, then why is it okay for you to post multiple comments which are - wait for it - simply whining complaints? And not even complaints about the topic, but just other people? Can't have it both ways, pal. Well, you can, but you're getting called out for it.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:38 a.m. CST

    Ye Olde Buttrocke

    by Seven_of_Borgnine

    I like a good heavy metal wallop to the skull every now and again, but not with my sword and sorcery epics. It's just not an appropriate vibe for the genre. It's like scoring The Matrix with bagpipes or Tron with John Williams. What marketing genius gave us this "gladiator metal" trend and when can we look forward to its exit?

  • May 5, 2011, 1:40 a.m. CST

    Looks like a Bollywood version of Conan

    by ratpack223

    Sigh...

  • May 5, 2011, 1:41 a.m. CST

    Kevred

    by Happyfat73

    My point is... this is AICN, where 2 minutes of quickly-edited, highly compressed footage is all a talkbacker needs to form a complete and final judgement on a film... It's a paradigm that is entirely worthy of mockery, IMO. I'm not saying at all everything must be happy and uplifting, but by the same token, where is all this cutting analysis of which you speak? (Your own analysis notwithstanding - BTW, kudos to you for acknowledging that you are critiquing a trailer, not a film.)</p> A trailer is not a film. Take THOR for example - there's a movie whose trailer completely failed to represent the scope and tone of the film. The film was much better than the trailer promised.</p> By all means, form an opinion of the trailer - decide if the film is something you might want to watch - but it is not fallacious at all to take the piss out of people who act like this is the worst thing ever made, based on a trailer. </p> Maybe it's just me, because I wait until I've seen a film before deeming whether it sucks, rules or (most likely) falls somewhere in between. Until I've seen the film, however, I'll reserve judgement on its ultimate worth and take the piss out of histrionic talkbackers, thankyou very much.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:42 a.m. CST

    Oh Dear, that looks truly mediocre.

    by Fortunesfool

  • May 5, 2011, 1:46 a.m. CST

    Those rubbishing Momoa, you seen any of his work?

    by Charlie

    He's was good in Star Gate Atlantis. He played a charismatic character with a bad side and a dark history well for that show. In Game of Thrones, he looks pretty imposing and bad ass. Although only had to grunt so far. He filmed that straight after Conan. Both of these point to him being able to pull this off quite well. What's the problem? Just hating to hate.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:46 a.m. CST

    Ad to the trailer itself...

    by Happyfat73

    It looks like it wants to be Clash of the Titans. If the film is anything like that, then I'll go in expecting a reasonably cheesy piece of modern, mid-budget schlock.</p> I sometime wonder what people expect from a modern Conan movie - it's pulp after all. And this is pretty much what pulp looks like in the modern Hollywood blockbuster paradigm.</p> I'm not too concerned with the casting of Momoa - he does barbarian pretty well in Game of Thrones. We'll see.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:48 a.m. CST

    PS

    by Seven_of_Borgnine

    It's just as annoying in trailers even when (or especially when) the actual movie doesn't use that kind of soundtrack... also annoying is being burdened by the uncertainty over the question of which way they're actually planning to go with it.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:49 a.m. CST

    That is not Conan. Not at all.

    by Saen

  • May 5, 2011, 1:49 a.m. CST

    @happyfat, thanks for sharing your opinion on Thor

    by kevred

    I'm wanting to like the film more than I like the trailers, so your comment gives me hope. Seeing it Friday night. And you're right that most of the "analysis" here is BS.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:55 a.m. CST

    LOL

    by my liege

    They dubbed in the lion's roar! The Thor trailer did the same thing on that shot of Odin pointing. Is there really someone sat there going "Guys, what these trailers really need is a lion's roar dubbed over someone angrily shouting". NO BUYS.

  • May 5, 2011, 2 a.m. CST

    @ kevred, re: THOR

    by Happyfat73

    Most of the reviews I've read are spot on.... i.e. - The meat of the film which takes place in Asgaard (and Jotenheim) is really great. The New Mexico stuff feels abbreviated and somewhat rushed.</p> The production design is simply outstanding and the effects are great. My major complaint (that I haven't read in reviews) is with how dark the 3D makes the Jotenheim scenes - the location is dark to begin with, and the 3D darkening makes some of the action quite hard to discern. I would have preferred to see it in 2D, but that wasn't an option at my local theatre.</p> Basically, I came out of it thinking that Kenneth Branagh did surprisingly well with the action (who'da thunk it?). I'd rate it as not quite as good as Iron Man, but better than Iron Man 2.

  • Mate ... If you can link me to ANYTHING that proves Arnie was EVER 5'8 then I will happily bow down to your wisdom! ....... Otherwise zip it with your hatred and fuck off.

  • Wow .... sounds fucking impressive ...

  • May 5, 2011, 2:15 a.m. CST

    Gonna be PG-13!!and why is Conan so SMALL?!!

    by Fritzlorrerains

    I don't want a puny, skinny ass Conan!!! There is a reason they hardly show him in the trailer,

  • May 5, 2011, 2:22 a.m. CST

    the sex scene looks good

    by teddy_duchamp

    CGI tits!

  • May 5, 2011, 2:31 a.m. CST

    korus1234- it's a confirmed R rating.

    by sam jacksons wig

  • May 5, 2011, 2:31 a.m. CST

    Looks okay! Will give it a watch!!!

    by sam jacksons wig

  • May 5, 2011, 2:42 a.m. CST

    Needs more Dothraki...

    by BiggusDickus

  • May 5, 2011, 2:51 a.m. CST

    Looks okay

    by tomimt

    Some of the effect work looks a bit clunky, but overall the movie looks it might be entertaining.

  • May 5, 2011, 2:54 a.m. CST

    Looks good apart from the lead

    by Greger Nyholm

    The look of it is not completely awful, it's better than my worst fears. But - I'm sorry - Momoa is not Conan. Like anakinsdiapers said: Conan is supposed to be a northerner, not an islander. Momoa fits the character of Kal Drogo perfectly, I like him there. As an eastern horse warrior, yes, absolutely. But as Conan - a northern barbarian - sorry, but no. And I really had hoped that I would be wrong, and that Momoa could pull it off...

  • May 5, 2011, 2:58 a.m. CST

    Wait??

    by NoMotivatioN

    Is it just me or...."what the fuck was that?" Alot of stuff was happening sure buuuuut whats happening again? Gonna wait for the next trailer to have annnnny feelings about this one ;/

  • May 5, 2011, 3:06 a.m. CST

    Okay, better than we had dared believe

    by HarryBlackPotter

  • May 5, 2011, 3:06 a.m. CST

    And Momoa is just awesome in Game of Thrones

    by HarryBlackPotter

  • May 5, 2011, 3:10 a.m. CST

    Needs to be gory like Starz 'Spartacus' and it will be awesome!

    by HarryBlackPotter

    If it is full on R / 18 as the producers are saying (and you can't show gore in a trailer), this could be an awesome ride - especially in 3D with hot geysers of blood hitting you in the eye!

  • May 5, 2011, 3:13 a.m. CST

    Game of Thrones sold me on the guy

    by David Cloverfield

    Than again, he has a way better character to play there.

  • This movie has failure writen all over it. It would be fantastic if i was proven wrong, but fuck if i think i'll.

  • May 5, 2011, 3:44 a.m. CST

    Pulp is raw and visceral, and Howard's writing is

    by Dennis_Moore

    lyrical and evocative for something that is usually terse. A movie of his stuff should look REAL, despite the fantastical facets. This just appears too dreamlike and murky with the over intricate design in the sets and imagery and the surreal color tinting.

  • May 5, 2011, 3:45 a.m. CST

    Like I said, it looks more like Brom's art, recent

    by Dennis_Moore

    gothic dark fantasy-esque.

  • May 5, 2011, 3:52 a.m. CST

    Looks like "the Seeker" or some shitty syndicated crap

    by Executor

    Ridiculously terrible. This will make about 5 dollars.

  • May 5, 2011, 4:01 a.m. CST

    Interesting

    by Majereuk

    Can't form a definite conclusion from the trailer, but there's much to like, and much to dislike. Amused at people going on about Momoa's looks- I'm going to call body image envy on that one. Worst thing about it is the score. I'm a full-on metalhead, but Conan needs big classical arrangements and viking choirs, not rock guitar. If nothing else, the score to the original Conan still be far superior, unless this is temp stuff.

  • May 5, 2011, 4:12 a.m. CST

    FIRST FLOP OF SUMMER...

    by marineboy

    unless Green Lantern beats them to it ;)

  • May 5, 2011, 4:33 a.m. CST

    Has a Prince of Persia vibe

    by hallmitchell

    And that is not a compliment.

  • May 5, 2011, 4:38 a.m. CST

    by Omar B

    Arnold has been too old to play king conan for a while since conan became king of aquilonia in his 30s and didn't hold the crown more than a few years. I'm excited about this movie, the look of the sets recall a few reh stories (mentioned in my previous post).

  • May 5, 2011, 5:40 a.m. CST

    whatthehellhappenedtome

    by AsimovLives

    "And the original looked like Gone With The Wind?" No, it looked even better.

  • And he sucked in SG:Atlantis as well. The guy has zero charisma.

  • May 5, 2011, 5:50 a.m. CST

    Epic Fail

    by MorpheusTheSandman

    I don't know if the movie will be any good, but the trailer is horrible. Just a selection of images and no story.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:09 a.m. CST

    deathblow: don't know which REH books you've read

    by palewook

    but this conan trailer looks nothing like any of REH's conan stories. not one, not in any way. its a knock off of the scorpion king/prince of persia. the tech in the trailer is all wrong for REH. the explosions and slow-mo action is crap in REH world as well. the only hope this film has to make money, the teen audience. look at the trailer again, that's who its aimed at.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:14 a.m. CST

    I'll never get tired of the jokes about Conan The Kushitte

    by AsimovLives

    Some might even say Conan The Ko-Shite.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:15 a.m. CST

    Conan The Surfer Dude

    by AsimovLives

  • May 5, 2011, 6:16 a.m. CST

    Belit--and Arnold's height.

    by Hipshot

    But you notice Conan never said he loved HER. Now, it's certainly possible that he just couldn't say stuff like that...strong and silent. As for Arnold's height. Don't make me laugh. No way he's 5'8''. I"m more than that, and have stood near Arnold, and he's much bigger than me. In "Pumping Iron" we see him standing barefoot near Lou Ferrigno, and Ferrigno is a little bigger than Arnold, but not that much. And Ferrigno is HUGE. Saw him at Comic Con once, and...Jeeze. You must be confusing him with Stallone, who is probably around 5'8". Every picture of Stallone and Arnold together Stallone's entire frame is clearly smaller. We know how huge Dolf Lundgren is (and Carl Weathers is pretty good size) and if he was greatly smaller than 5'8" he would have looked like Billy Barty standing next to Dolf, and he didn't.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:26 a.m. CST

    Looks ... Conan-y

    by Thunderbolt Ross

    And better than Conan the Destroyer. Not that that's saying much or really anything at all.

  • As Bruce Willis said in that movie WHAT JUST HAPPENED: "It's the pussy, right?"

  • May 5, 2011, 6:37 a.m. CST

    !

    by KGersen

    Looks a lot better than I expected from the first trailer which looked like it was trying to hide how dire the film was going to be. And Momoa looks a lot more like how Conan is described by Howard than Arnie ever did. Let's hope it's ok, please don't kill a potentially great series of films with a shit first one.

  • May 5, 2011, 7:30 a.m. CST

    fanboy71

    by AsimovLives

    As far i'm concerned, Conan The Destroyer never happened. I was never a fan of Arnold, but he killed in CONAN THE BARBARIAN, he was Conan in that movie. Beside,s the character of Conan is suppoed to be melancolic and taciturn, not a talker.

  • May 5, 2011, 7:33 a.m. CST

    Don't get the same feel......

    by westie

    I'm no sword and sorcery lover, but the draw of the first movie for me was the destiny aspect. His people murdured, a slave then a thief, he one day would become a King by his own hand, and wear a crown upon a troubled brow. When the long haired James Hetfield-thug looks at Conan as he kicks ass in the orgy scene and says, "You." When his father tells Conan what he can trust in the world.

  • May 5, 2011, 7:33 a.m. CST

    Also should have had Poledouris' score.

    by westie

  • May 5, 2011, 7:43 a.m. CST

    Conan the OBrian

    by PoppaRotzi

    Just don't call him "red".

  • May 5, 2011, 7:57 a.m. CST

    Looks and sounds like a bag of ass

    by Judge Dredds Dirty Undies

    but I'm sure it will please all the low foreheads.

  • Damn that looks cool! The kids are going to love it! Now all it needs is to have some extreme sports and maybe some social media references then it'll be a hoot!

  • May 5, 2011, 8:10 a.m. CST

    trailer was too busy, made my head hurt....

    by BikoQue

  • May 5, 2011, 8:13 a.m. CST

    garethkeenan

    by GroolDemon

    It looks like an homage to his work, but a watered down Hollywoodized version that has been run through too many filters and lost all its soul is what I am talking about. Everything in it looks like cliche dialed up to 11 with any semblance of real passion or soul stripped out of it. There's no real sense of plight, pride, gore, redemption, or legacy anywhere in that trailer, and more than likely, the full movie will be no different. Hell, maybe I am just jaded and seen too many sword and sorcery movies in my life, but this just looks shitty to me. I'll reserve final judgement for when or if I actually see this thing, but that'll probably wait for some late night Netflix bender at some far off future time when there's nothing better in my queue to watch.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:16 a.m. CST

    Not bad...

    by NzYme

    This qualifies as popcorn type film and that's enough for me to so see and buy the BD when it comes out. Not all of these geek films are going to be Dark Knight...

  • May 5, 2011, 8:17 a.m. CST

    Anyone else hear the screams?

    by Judge Briggs

    NYEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I heard 2 of them!

  • May 5, 2011, 8:41 a.m. CST

    The production value looks great but

    by iakobos

    they hardly show the main character. I smell a Rotten Tomato score in the making.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:42 a.m. CST

    Trailer music aside, that rocked . . .

    by Nice Marmot

    Looks more like a real Conan adventure than the other two. Haters made up their minds that this "sucked" the second this was announced. And thank God its real-world colored & not all orange.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:45 a.m. CST

    Conan wears eye makeup

    by TheBuffalo

    Cute. But another shot of arrows raining down? Can't they think of anything else?

  • May 5, 2011, 8:50 a.m. CST

    ORIGINAL THEME MUSIC PLEASE

    by craptacular

    Krom laughs at your new age metal theme, he laughs from his mountain.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:50 a.m. CST

    and holy overuse of wilhelm scream batman

    by craptacular

  • May 5, 2011, 8:53 a.m. CST

    Didn't Realize he was Khal Drogo

    by Wcwlkr

    I didn't realize that was the same guy from Game of Thrones Khal Drogo. I love that show. His character doesn't say much just exudes Don't Eff with me.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:56 a.m. CST

    That Trailer actually has me Interested

    by Wcwlkr

    I had absolutely no desire to see this movie up until that point. I'm still not completely sold but I may just go check this out. It looked pretty good actually.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:01 a.m. CST

    The Milius Conan is a great movie...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...but a terrible Conan movie. <p> I adore REH's work and love the Milius film, but there is virtually nothing in it which corresponds to Howard's character or the Hyborian world. It's an exceedingly well-made and visceral heroic fantasy movie but if you changed the names, nothing would make you think it was a take on Howard's Conan. Milius has been very upfront about this and admitted that he used the property as an excuse to make his "viking film", as he put it. The advisors from Marvel who worked with Milius said he hadn't even read the original stories. <p> I have hated everything Nispel has made so far and was appalled when I heard he had been tapped for the director's seat. The production stills have alleviated some of my worries and this trailer does even more in that regard. It certainly LOOKS more like the Hyborian world than the Arnie film (which looked like Mad Max without the cars, mohawks and assless chaps). And Momoa seems a lot more like Howard's vision of Conan than Arnie ever did. Sure, we can bitch about the lack of a "square-cut mane of straight black hair", but it seems a rather small thing that Momoa has a curl or two in there. He has a deep, commanding voice and seems infinitely more along the lines of Howard's "panther-like" Cimmerian than the lumbering oaf Arnie portrayed. <p> Jury's still out on this for me, but it's looking better. The same people who made Solomon Kane are behind this and that movie was astonishingly faithful to Howard's character, so we'll see...

  • May 5, 2011, 9:02 a.m. CST

    Oh, and...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...I utterly HATED the rockesque score they used for this trailer. That shit didn't work for Kull and it sure as hell won't work for Conan. Hope it's just the trailer.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:06 a.m. CST

    re Arnold's height.

    by DocPazuzu

    I've never met him myself, but one of my aunts used to do lots of volunteer work for the Special Olympics and met him once during the 80's. Her impression? <p> "Very friendly, and surprisingly short."

  • May 5, 2011, 9:09 a.m. CST

    Better than that wispy candle trailer....

    by frakthetoasters

    ...I'm game. I want to see it.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:18 a.m. CST

    2 reasons it will blow chunks

    by David Ortiz

  • May 5, 2011, 9:18 a.m. CST

    1 - Conan DOES NOT wear eyeliner

    by David Ortiz

  • May 5, 2011, 9:19 a.m. CST

    2- Nispel is a hack

    by David Ortiz

  • May 5, 2011, 9:19 a.m. CST

    Good points, docpazuzu

    by rev_skarekroe

    I dug the first Conan, and I bet Robert E Howard would've like it too, but it doesn't have much to do with his stories. This new one DOES look more like the Howard stories (as they exist in my head), but there's still something a bit off about the lead actor, I think.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:30 a.m. CST

    Ahnuld was iconic...

    by Marshal_Lannes

    ...in the first Conan, but Momoa is much more in keeping with Howard's and Frazetta's vision. After all, Conan is suppose to be a thief...not a human tank...

  • May 5, 2011, 9:38 a.m. CST

    You Know How I Know it's Gonna Suck?

    by Who Dat Ninga

    Generic "leap-and-stab" shot at 1:05.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:43 a.m. CST

    The production design looks like something

    by ewokstew

    out of a Frazetta painting, which I like. I'm just not sure how the rest of the film will hold up so I'll reserve judgement until I see it.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:43 a.m. CST

    Hmmm.

    by JumpinJehosaphat

    I'm more of a fan of magic being used very, very sparingly in these stories. Unless the trailer simply stitched together the few magical monster money shots that exist, I'm left to assume this whole moving is chocked full of, well, like a lot of other people here are saying, stuff from other recent films with big monsters and such.

  • That's fine and dandy if you have absolutly no knowledge whatsoever of who are the people involved. However if you ar knowledgable of the works of the people involved in a movie, then to have no oponion is just a show of lack of intellectual capacity.

  • May 5, 2011, 10 a.m. CST

    Quick question...

    by Marlboroliteman

    Is this hunk of shit a theatrical movie or a cable T.V. Sci Fi Channel movie??? Cause if it's on the Sci Fi Channel I might tune in n out....might mind you.

  • May 5, 2011, 10:03 a.m. CST

    what of the book, actually?

    by mutombo

    i suppose it's considerd a classic, but is it really good compared to the other fantasy great uns? Also: trailer looked like popcorn shit, action action action, all to statisfy the thick folks who liked Clash of Titans. Yes, if you liked that one, you are thick. Where is the story in the trailer? I have no effing clue what the hell it's about, other than the fact that the name 'conan the barbarian' rings a bell.

  • May 5, 2011, 10:10 a.m. CST

    They shouldv'e gotten Marc Singer.

    by ndoty_sa

    Beastmaster still rules. As does Tanya Roberts.

  • May 5, 2011, 10:14 a.m. CST

    I didn't even realize that was him in Game of Thrones

    by Jaster

    I love the locations and the direction and cinematography seems very competant. Jason Momoa looks like Conan and is wiping Arnold's image from my mind. But when he talks it all goes to shit. He just doesn't sound like a barbarian. Stephen Lang looks bizarrely miscast and what the fuck is with his Robocop armor? There are also a lot of cliches on display in this trailer, chief among them bending over backwards to avoid flying object. Come the fuck on man, that shit is TIRED! I don't think I'll see this in theaters, but I might blind buy the Blu-ray when it comes out.

  • May 5, 2011, 10:17 a.m. CST

    yeah... I am going to need you to come in on Saturday

    by Micah fendley

    This looks like some old bullshit

  • May 5, 2011, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Where's the main guy...

    by Marlboroliteman

    Why didn't they show Conan, all I saw were villains and second rate thugs. Are they keeping him a secret??? What's the deal??

  • May 5, 2011, 10:33 a.m. CST

    Crom laughs at this trailer

    by DrPain

  • May 5, 2011, 10:42 a.m. CST

    Ditch the awful music...

    by Lord Elric

    And make your edits a bit less spastic, really half second cuts do sucketh, and it's looking decent. Think more "Poledouris", less Nu Metal.

  • May 5, 2011, 10:52 a.m. CST

    Ronan The Barbarian...only on SyFy

    by Squinty CGI Flynn

    i look forward to bootlegging this and I will happily PAY ADMISSION to a screening of the original.

  • May 5, 2011, 11:01 a.m. CST

    Oh no...

    by thebastard

    Really? This is what we get after 30+ years of waiting. Slo-mo action shots, a whole lot of bad dialogue, and bad CGI. The Conan stories were about the atmosphere, feeling the nature of all the characters involved and the brutality of such a barbaric time. Not a bunch of over-stylized underwear models and titty dancers flailing about on screen. I had hopes that maybe this would be good, that I could look forward to a Conan movie that would really draw from the Robert E. Howard stories. Did anyone see Valhalla Rising? Thats what this should've felt like. A brutal, violent, and bloody saga. Of swords and sorcery, where women were treated like slaves and a man's life was worth next to nothing. Instead, we get another popcorn-flick hardly worthy of my ten dollars to see it on the big screen.

  • May 5, 2011, 11:06 a.m. CST

    "just a show of lack of intellectual capacity. "

    by DocPazuzu

    As usual, asimovlives, you demonstrate the mental flexibility of bowl of apple sauce. When someone says they're reserving final judgment on a movie, it doesn't mean they "don't have an opinion". It simply means that what they're seeing is conflicting with what they're expecting and that they're open to the idea of it actually being better than they've expected based on the evidence available so far. <p> If anything, YOUR post demonstrated a dearth of intellect since you're so rigidly convinced of your own opinion without even having seen it. <p> I know irony isn't your thing, but they don't do nuance in Portugal either? Do you only deal in absolutes? As dreary as I hear most of it is, surely you must have some concept of grey zones?

  • May 5, 2011, 11:14 a.m. CST

    docpasshole, fucking die already!

    by AsimovLives

  • May 5, 2011, 11:16 a.m. CST

    Oh look. A real Conan!!

    by Douglas

    A Conan that can actually "move like a panther" and "fight with speed and agility" and isn't some lumbering oaf with muscles too damn big to even allow him to WALK properly. ANNND, this Conan can be understood when he TALKS. So far, this avid Conan reader LIKES what he sees (which is the exact OPPOSITE reaction I had when I saw the Arnold Conan). But, then again, AICN talkbackers are known for hating.

  • May 5, 2011, 11:22 a.m. CST

    by Rene Gonzalez

    Agree on Conan not looking Samoan. I've read all the Conan books as well and this take is certainly closer than Arnold's ever could be. This guy looks menacing and that was the one thing missing from the previous Conan movies. I'll go see it just to see how Mamoa does as Conan.

  • May 5, 2011, 11:24 a.m. CST

    asimovlives

    by DocPazuzu

    I really do believe you have some sort of mental condition based on your talkback input over the years. Far be it from me to say what kind of medication you have been prescribed, but I do suggest you start taking it as soon as possible.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:02 p.m. CST

    The trailer isn't really doing it for me...

    by Ironhelix

    ...however, it doesn't looks as bad as i thought it might. There could possibly be a watchable movie in there somewhere.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:08 p.m. CST

    Pass

    by HeWhoCannotBeNamed

    I'll stick with the comics and video game. Dark Horse's release please me greatly and Ron Perlman voicing Conan works for me. This trailer reinvigorates my disdain for reboots in general.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:43 p.m. CST

    The new Conan movie looks better than I ever thought it could.

    by Stereotypical Evil Archer

    I had written this off as shit, but now I'm almost interested. The original Conan the Barbarian is one of my favorite movies. After a summer of superheroes this new Conan might hit the spot. It's just weird, I wasn't expecting the new Conan to work. And it may not work. But in this trailer, it works. One good TV spot and then I'll be convinced to see this.

  • May 5, 2011, 12:51 p.m. CST

    It looks good.

    by Yer_Maw

    Okay, it won't match the original Conan The Barbarian, that's a given - but it'll piss all over Destroyer. And let's not forget that it was Destroyer that made for Arnold's last pass at the character. I'm just loving the amount of bullshit I'm seeing here about Mamoa looking 'small' - fuck entirely off. The guy doesn't look like a 'roid-riddled bodybuilder, thankfully, but he's fucking huge (in the sense of being seriously imposing and looking like he could rip your arms off for a laugh). And he's clearly taller by at least a couple of inches than Arnold, if that actually matters.

  • it is hard to see some of the details. Having said that, it looks pretty good. Certainly seems to look a lot better than I thought it would. Momoa seems like he might make a good Conan. Not as cool as Arnold's Conan, but maybe one closer to the character that Robert E. Howard created. Anyways, this has a nice scope to it. It seems like a bigger scale adventure piece than the Arnold Conan films. Also, anything is better than the second one, Conan the Destroyer. That one was horrible. So I can't really complain as Arnold and Milius will probably not be doing anymore Conan films. At this point a new take on it is about all that we can hope for. One thing though, seeing how John Milius did a good series with HBO's Rome, maybe someday he could produce a Conan series for HBO? The original Conan tales are all pretty much short stories or short novellas anyways. It seems like a perfect fit for a TV series format, especially for HBO if Game of Thrones stays popular for a few years or longer.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:14 p.m. CST

    Looks Fucking Awful.

    by Stryder

    I think Momoa is perfect as Khal Drogo in Game of Thones, but he's just horribly miscast here. On top of that, there's the generic rock music, CGI backgrounds, "epic" battle scenes, "hot chick" demon/ priestess/ monster/ what have you characters... Every fucking modern fantasy movie is "Sony Playstation's God Of War: The Motion Picture - Sponsored By Red Bull!" Going to skip this just like I skipped the Clash of the Titans remake, Prince of Persia, and all the other bullshit fantasy remakes, retreads and idiocy.

  • May 5, 2011, 1:36 p.m. CST

    Why not just call it generic movie #139,678?

    by alienindisguise

    Looks lame

  • May 5, 2011, 1:59 p.m. CST

    by Omar B

    But the original Conan was a fantasy with magic, creatures, wizards, etc. All the trappings of a fantasy world. To me even thematically this is closer to what REH intended. I can clearly see influences of Red Nails, Queen Of The Black Coast and God In The Bowl in that short trailer. I'll admit it's not the best commercial, but I see enough to remain interested.

  • May 5, 2011, 2:31 p.m. CST

    turd

    by DocPazuzu

    I pretty much know all of Howard's stories by heart (and even wrote a masters thesis on them) and find the Momoa version much closer to Howard's barbarian than Arnie ever was, at least physically. <p> And that racial bullshit is just that -- bullshit. If Momoa's particular ethnic blend hadn't been known, nobody would be bleating about "Conan the Samoan" or "Conan the Kushite". The latter is particularly idiotic since Kush in Howard's stories is an ancient kingdom which culturally and racially corresponds to the North Africa of our world, and not the southern pacific region. Howard's Conan is described as having black hair, blue eyes and sun-bronzed skin. Momoa's eyes have been made blue for the film and his hair and skin are certainly dark enough to match that description. <p> As for Arnie, since he's Austrian, the closest corresponding ethnic match for his is the Gunderland region of Aquilonia -- not Cimmeria. Personally, that doesn't matter to me since I'm more concerned with what the character LOOKS LIKE, rather than where the actor is from in real life. Arnie simply does not look like Howard's Conan in any meaningful way. Momoa, however, does.

  • May 5, 2011, 2:37 p.m. CST

    As for "a barbarous accent"...

    by DocPazuzu

    ... let's put that discussion to rest right now. In a cinematic world where "civilized" people speak with English accents, someone speaking with a non-descript American accent would sound barbarous. No need for Teutonic mangling of the language to get that across.

  • May 5, 2011, 2:45 p.m. CST

    looks purdy, but not sure about Mo-mo...

    by KillaKane

    and I sincerely hope the score's not going to be a nu-metal orchestral crossover like that wank in the trailer, not a bead of sweat on the balls of Poledouris's score. Will wait and see, but this could go either way.

  • May 5, 2011, 3:34 p.m. CST

    Thank you deathblow

    by Count Screwface

    Pretty much summed it up. So much fucking pessimism. And shame on Aint It Cool News for "promoting" this movie in the first place by calling Mamoa "the guy from Bay Watch" every damn time a new post was up. Assholes. It was also every single one of you who shot down fucking Ledger when he was announced. Show some hope for once.

  • May 5, 2011, 3:34 p.m. CST

    I hate big explosions in medieval movie genres.

    by DoctorWho?

    With stone age technology I doubt much shit was blowin' up back in the day. Isn't an explosion pretty tame compared to some unleashed sorcery and magic anyway? Stick with that.<p>

  • May 5, 2011, 3:38 p.m. CST

    And the Nu Metal track is an epic fail.

    by DoctorWho?

  • May 5, 2011, 3:40 p.m. CST

    doctorwho?

    by DocPazuzu

    What's to say they aren't sorcerous explosions?

  • May 5, 2011, 3:57 p.m. CST

    BLASPHEMOUS KNOW-NOTHINGS OF CINEMA!

    by Cureguy

    How dare you criticize Conan the Barbarian!It is and will always be a film classic.We are talking film and not the book so Howard fans quit yer bitchin'! Milius's skillful direction,amazing cinematography by Duke Callaghan,Basil Poledouris "Riders of Doom",Sandahl Bergman's fine tits & ass,James Earl Jones!,Mako,Gerry Lopez fine job as Subotai, Arny at his ass-kicking best, and a REAL R RATING! almost made an X! If you all do not know the brilliance of this film you have no right coming to this site and criticizing any film whatsoever! The original Conan film will still be recognized as a film classic, and Momoa's turn as Conan will be forgotton as a pixillated 3-D fad related cash grab!

  • May 5, 2011, 4:09 p.m. CST

    Re:sorcerous explosions

    by DoctorWho?

    Fireball spell...1d6 hp of damage if I remember correctly.

  • May 5, 2011, 4:13 p.m. CST

    doctorwho?

    by DocPazuzu

    heh

  • May 5, 2011, 4:15 p.m. CST

    cureguy

    by DocPazuzu

    I don't see too many people hating on the Milius film here. Most people seem to like or love the film but just see it as a poor or disingenuous adaptation of Howard's work.

  • May 5, 2011, 5:34 p.m. CST

    LIAM NEESON IN STAR WARS: EPISODE III

    by steves

    Liam Neeson has filmed a new scene for the Blu-Ray edition of Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith. Frank Oz also involved.

  • May 5, 2011, 5:35 p.m. CST

    LIAM NEESON IN STAR WARS: EPISODE III

    by steves

    Liam Neeson has filmed a new scene for the Blu-Ray edition of Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge Of The Sith. Frank Oz also involved.

  • May 5, 2011, 5:44 p.m. CST

    DocPazuzu

    by Cureguy

    People are failing to see the greatness of the original film! No one mentioned the craftsmanship and artistry of the film which made it one of the handful of classic fantasy films of history. Although Frazetta was not involved, Milius film was a love letter to him with some of the palace chamber scenes and the color palette that was used in the film.You are not going to get a literal translation of Howard's book to film(even with this new movie) unless they take it by a book by book basis on Conan. So just appreciate it for the film masterpiece that it is and stop unfairly comparing it to the books! Completely Outrageous!

  • May 5, 2011, 5:57 p.m. CST

    TheBastard summed up my thoughts rather aptly.

    by HeWhoCannotBeNamed

    I guess I'm just an old cynic. Out of touch.

  • May 5, 2011, 6 p.m. CST

    doctorwho?

    by Omar B

    There are many explosions in Conan stories. A lot of people seem to think that the Hyborea is just out of the stone age or something. There are explosions, gunpowder exists in Khiti (Asia), Aquilonia pretty much is Rome and Greece at their height. The world is pretty well advanced, it's pre industrial, but many cities have running water, street/indoor lighting provided by running natural gas as well as heat.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:02 p.m. CST

    A Barbarian Who Speaks the Kings English Perfectly

    by ChiTownsBest

    They picked the worst actor possible to play Conan. He the most feminine looking Conan you could have ever picked. The constant fake looking scowl only makes him look worse. They also seemed to show the same scowl while holding sword pose 100 times in that trailer.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:04 p.m. CST

    cureguy

    by DocPazuzu

    I do appreciate it for the great film it is. However, it would have been just as good if Milius hadn't simply used the Conan property and had actually made the viking movie he wanted to make. Milius' film is so off the mark that it shouldn't even be called a Conan movie. <p> The most unforgivable aspect was making Conan a slave for most of his life. The whole point of the character is that he was born free and was never cowed like the idiot man-child Arnie played. Milius virtually killed Howard's character ten minutes into the film. From then on it was CINO.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:21 p.m. CST

    docpazuzu

    by Omar B

    I agree. As fun as the Milius film is, it got Conan so wrong it really should have just been his Viking movie. The Cimmerians were never conquered, in fact they defeated the Aquilonian army, a war Conan fought in when he was 15 (but JM would have you think he was a slave). Conan was never enslaved, conquered, put in chains. He was a thief, pirate, mercenary, ranger, king, but never a slave. He was also more well educated than most then known scholars, he read every written language known, even the dead ones.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:43 p.m. CST

    We're not getting the Conan movie we had hoped for

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    But I'm going to be positive about this. Lol. Momoa doesn't look that bad, really. It's not that easy to cast Conan. Who would you cast? Momoa is a tad undersized but he IS very ripped, and has acting ability. The movie looks like a cheesy action movie but maybe it won't be half bad. I hope it's at least somewhat decent. I bet it's better than the Mummy 2 and 3. Maybe.

  • May 5, 2011, 6:47 p.m. CST

    All the canned Neu-Rock Music, Quick cut editing,

    by conspiracy

    CGI Masturbation, wanky 21st Century overly verbose screenwriting and Gymnastic influenced bullshit jumping around sword play CAN NOT IN ANY WAY compete with the MINIMALIST FUCKING MAJESTY is John Milius "Conan the Barbarian". Watch that original film...it is damned near perfect. The cinematography is beautiful, the script almost non-existent yet pitch perfect, and the score is possibly one of the finest scores ever put to a film. Even Arnold hit all the marks... When I see this fucking shit...I see Prince of Persia, 21st Century Clash of the Titans...it is that fucking generic. A Generic fucking film for generic ADD afflicted kids...who would get bored hearing Mako deliver the best narration ever given a story, or yawn when William Smith told Conan about Crom, and ask "Who is that old dude" when the Uber Manly and Testicle Heavy Max Von Sydow laid down the fact that Gold Looses its Luster. No Sir...this looks like Transformers with a fucking Loin Cloth. In fact I won't even bother to steal it unless the female leads show Full Frontal. Fuck This.

  • May 5, 2011, 7:09 p.m. CST

    The ideal Conan

    by LewisWetzel

    I read an interview with a Robert E. Howard scholar a few years ago, in which he said that the ideal Conan would be Charles Bronson's head on Clint Walker's body. No such actor exists, so I guess we take what we can get. Momao is too pretty, but otherwise seems credible. Better Conan the Surfer than Conan the Steroid Monster. As much as I love the Milius movie for its own merits, it is NOT REH's Conan. For all you pencil-necks who think Momao is skinny, I've got news for you: nobody as muscular as Arnold existed before the 1960's. In Howard's day, bodybuilding still had something to do with fitness (Howard was a practitioner), and the ideal would have been people like Lionel Strongfort or Eugene Sandow. Not some hypertrophied chemical experiment who has to consume 10,000 calories and work out 6 hours a day.

  • May 5, 2011, 7:47 p.m. CST

    ummm... Arnold's version doesn't hold up too well

    by MurderMostFowl

    This looks better than that 300 knockoff we saw a couple of weeks ago.

  • May 5, 2011, 7:54 p.m. CST

    mentaldominance

    by Omar B

    "If the directing and editing and scoring sucks." So I guess you saw the movie already ... or are you guessing based upon the same trailers we all saw? I will reserve judgment till I actually see it rather than jumping to conclusions. This movie has nothing to do with that first Conan movie which so many of you are in love with. It's simply not that movie and all the complaining isn't going to change that. But then, the first movie didn't have much to do with Conan in the first place.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:15 p.m. CST

    enough with the constant blinking.

    by vulturess

    2 second scene-BLACK-2 second scene-BLACK- 2 second scene-BLACK-2 second scene-BLACK- 2 second scene-BLACK-2 second scene-BLACK- my brain is in fuckin seizure ffs. it didnt really look that bad but i REALLY COULDNT PAY ATTENTION TO THE MOVIE bcuz my brain was BLINKING CONSTANTLY.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:48 p.m. CST

    People listen to your doctor. docpazuzu, that is…

    by blakindigo

    Seems obvious that docpazuzu has a deep respect for Howard's vision of Conan and how it's been mishandled in cinema. I think he's dead on mentioning "Solomon Kane" because that film felt more like a Howardesque world than Milius' "Conan," — recognized as a classic film.

  • May 5, 2011, 8:58 p.m. CST

    Docpazuzu

    by Cureguy

    PUHLEEEZE! It wouldn't have been as great if John had just made a Viking film.You can't be wishy washy and have it be both ways. Milius had enough of Frazetta's vision of Conan that it still felt like his world. Stop bitching because it doesn't fit Howard's complete vision. Neither is Momoa's movie going to be. Either appreciate Conan (1982) for the fine film that it is or say nothing about it. This site is about film & not which book adaptations are the most accurate. A perfect example is The Shining, it doesn't go with the book beat for beat and it is a vastly better film for it. A horror genre classic just as Conan is a rare fantasy genre classic.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:05 p.m. CST

    It doesn't look like shit.

    by Juggernaut125

    In fact, it doesn't look ENOUGH like shit. It looks TOO clean. Conan is a Barbarian and his world should look like filth and muck and grime. He needs to get that on him and not care. THAT would be a much better look for this film. One that I could respect and get behind. This Conan looks too pretty to be interesting.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:41 p.m. CST

    It's a trailer

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    Clash of the Titans had a similar trailer, and the actual movie wasn't edited like an MTV video. The problem with Clash wasn't the direction at all, the problem was mostly them butchering the story, then doing reshoots and butchering it some more. I agree the action in this looks too hyperkenetic, and I much prefer the style of the original Conan, of course. But seriously. The trailer obviously has cut the movie into a million tiny bits and turned it into an abomination that the marketing department thinks will sell well to the xBox addicted teens. Or something. They're probably fucking wrong but whatever, fuck them.

  • May 5, 2011, 9:53 p.m. CST

    Looks a lot bigger than expected.

    by SID 8.0

    I'll give it a look.

  • May 5, 2011, 10:06 p.m. CST

    Surprisingly it looks good. But where's the blood?

    by Mr Nicholas

  • May 5, 2011, 10:30 p.m. CST

    pathfinder meets ong bak...didnt even finish trailer

    by JestaFool

  • May 5, 2011, 10:38 p.m. CST

    I think, in this case

    by JillianneSix

    that I'm going to do what you boys usually do and say,"I don't know if this is going to be any good, but Jason Momoa gives me lady wood."

  • May 5, 2011, 11:13 p.m. CST

    turd_has_risen

    by Douglas

    Obviously YOU haven't read any of the Howard Conan's or else you would know that the Cimmereans were descendants of the Atlanteans (Kull is a direct descendant of Conan) and NOT from "Germanic or Celtic tribes" which didn't exist at the time of Howard's Hyborean Age. As to the question of "realism", Conan routinely faced off against giant snakes, talking elephants, wizards, zombies, spirits, demons, and metal-encrusted men. Your claim that the Arnold Conan is closer to the real Conan because it was more "realistic" is laughable. To slag this Conan off because Nispel is directing it is laughable as well since the Arnold Conan was co-written by Oliver Stone, who has made SEVERAL turd movies himself (of which Conan was one).

  • May 5, 2011, 11:16 p.m. CST

    I was wrong, Momoa is perfect for the role

    by jonsnow

    The original was more of a viking movie. Which is not that far from the book since Conan was half Scandinavian and Atlantian. But after doing some research I came across how Howard described him more of looking like a proto-celt. So in fact he should look Spanish with blue eyes. I was wrong. Momoa is the perfect Conan. The movie just needs better music.

  • May 5, 2011, 11:21 p.m. CST

    The Milius Original

    by Douglas

    I don't hate the John Milius original. I just DO NOT for one second think that anyone involved in the project actually sat down and read ANY actual Conan stories. To me, it would have been a FAR superior film if it had been called ATOR: THE CAMEL-PUNCHER or some other sh!t like that.

  • May 5, 2011, 11:33 p.m. CST

    cureguy

    by DocPazuzu

    What is it you don't seem to understand? I LOVE the Milius Conan. I just don't think it's a good Conan movie. That's not "having it both ways" or some sort of contradiction. <p> The Milius film veers away from Howard's work not only "beat-for-beat", but more importantly -- thematically. All the essential things about Conan as a character have been altered to the point where it's a completely different person. Kubrick took numerous liberties with The Shining, but Nicholson's Jack Torrance is still basically the same guy King envisioned. That's a flawed comparison. <p> As for visually, the only scene in the Milius film which feels like a Frazetta painting is the fantastic orgy 'n' soup confrontation scene.

  • May 6, 2011, 12:19 a.m. CST

    Yes Arnold is not Conan

    by Rupee88

    I mean maybe it is for you subliterate simple-minded retards, but not for others who don't get all their culture from movies and TV. You guys have low IQs and you are annoying.

  • May 6, 2011, 12:23 a.m. CST

    Wow bitter and hateful responses...

    by Andrew Coleman

    No surprise. AICN is now dominated by bitter fucks who live in basements. Rarely is there ever positive feed back or comments here. This trailer actually looks ten times better then what I was expecting. You fucking can't go see TF3 and not see this. Because if you do you can't say shit.

  • May 6, 2011, 12:44 a.m. CST

    Clash of the Titans

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    had heavy metal music in the trailer, but not in the film, correct?

  • May 6, 2011, 1:38 a.m. CST

    so i watched the whole thing on mute...

    by mattforce7

    ...aaaand can pretty much envision the entire flick. SAY, does anyone round here CARE about the MK web series anymore?...and how about that Correspondents speech, what a hoot,some fuuny sh**

  • May 6, 2011, 2:18 a.m. CST

    Passing on this one.

    by SunTzu77

    Momoa just isn't working as Conan to me. It feels like his idea of portraying Conan is just using a Batman-ish style voice. Perhaps, he's evolved since filming Conan. Momoa actually does a better "barbarian interpretation" in "Game of Thrones" which I will guarantee is 1000x better than this film. I love that series.

  • May 6, 2011, 2:19 a.m. CST

    "ATOR: THE CAMEL-PUNCHER"

    by DocPazuzu

    I am totally going to steal that and make it my next username if I ever get banned.

  • May 6, 2011, 2:20 a.m. CST

    Yeah, Clash of the Titans.

    by SunTzu77

    @phvcko It's funny that you say that. I thought several of the shots felt like "Clash of the Titans" while viewing the trailer.

  • May 6, 2011, 2:33 a.m. CST

    he looks like tyra banks

    by CT1

    love the batan voice, looks really cool and has potential, been awhile since I've seen heros running slow motion towards the camera with explosions going off in the background, oh and something I really appreciate in cinema is large epic shots of soldiers walking in formation across large open fields, it really makes the contrast pop when later you see two very large opposing armies running head long into each other as we watch right at the goal line, I'm glad art isn't dead. roflmao love the Matrix pose too, oh also very cool when in slow motion he bends over backwards and avoids a projectile like Neo in the first Matrix.. really really like when he's in slow motion again but this time he's spinning horizontally in the air, it's so cool because this time he's not even dodging anything, he's just spinning, that really kinda of blows your mind and keeps a nice "thematic" framework, I'm glad studios are beginning to respect filmmakers again. Nothing wrong with unappealing lead actresses; it went.. ok.. with Maggie Gyllenhaal, certainly didn't hurt the film in any way.

  • May 6, 2011, 2:33 a.m. CST

    What a let down....

    by bloodawn5

    Really i dont know what the fuck is wrong with Momoas face, every time he makes that weak barbarian scream, he looks dumb as hell,that girl looks ridiculous, and again, the guy from Avatar as the bad guy, FUCK THEY RUINED EVERYTHING, THEY WILL BE NO MORE CONAN FOR A TIME, AT LEAST NOT A BAD ASS ONE.

  • May 6, 2011, 2:34 a.m. CST

    oh forgot cgi sand

    by CT1

    always looks real

  • May 6, 2011, 4:01 a.m. CST

    "Marcus Nispel's CONAN: THE BARBARIAN movie"

    by AsimovLives

    Words to strike fear even in the hearts of battle hardened cimmerians.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:04 a.m. CST

    "Arnold's version doesn't hold up too well" Bullshit!!

    by AsimovLives

    The movie now achieved the mythical status of classic. Becasue it's so fucking good. John Milius's CONAN THE BARBARIAN movie is timeless, a movie for the ages. And because Milius made it with that classic style, it will not suffer the same problem that this new Conan movie has, which is, it's atempt to be hype to the times it was made, which means that soon enough the new Conan moie will look dated like hell while Milius' movie will endure and feel fresh.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:07 a.m. CST

    drwhoman

    by AsimovLives

    Don't be daft. Read Robert. E. Howard's descriptions of Cona the the most constant words he uses are giant and melancolic. Conan is an impossible man, who's both gigantic in stature like an ox and also agille like a felline. He's an impossible man. But Arnold somehow mannaged to pull it off, he's beleivable as a big man who can take anybody because he's a fast fighter too. And i'm not even much of a fan of Arnold, but i have to give him props where deserved.

  • There's things shown in the traielr which ojne coudl say came from REH's stories. However, it's the cooking of all those elements that makes me worried. And all those trendy shots of slow mo-crap crap robs me of any small amount of enthusiasm i might had from the little bits of seemly good things shown. I fear this movie is oneof those that can make a compeling trailer (for some) but the end result will be crap. I'm certain many of you here who are giving thismoie a chance will come out of the theaters thinking "this was such a missed oportunity". I fear that once again the skeptics will be right. And really, who in teir fucking mind would hire Marcus Niespel to direct a Conan movie? He fucked up a Vikings Vs Indians movie. If you fuck up that, you fuck up anything. The guy was wrong for this movie from day one. What's next, Niespel directing Diary Of Anne Frank?

  • May 6, 2011, 4:16 a.m. CST

    by flaflaflooey

    by AsimovLives

    "Can we get past the "because the movie came first it's sacred" attitude already?" You are completly missing the point.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:19 a.m. CST

    acquanetta

    by AsimovLives

    Arnold didn't so mucy run away from the role of Conan (which he loved), as he run from Dino DeLaurenttis, who back then hold the cinematic rights.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:34 a.m. CST

    It seesm that Liongates has inundated this talkback with plants

    by AsimovLives

    Look at all the enthusiasm for this movie, even after the lame trailer. It's suspicious!

  • Obviously you never saw HENRY V.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:40 a.m. CST

    Momoa is much better than I expected...

    by Bill Clay

    But that gravel voice reminds me too much of Ronan Dex. And that fighting move at 1:06 when he jumps up in the air and comes down with the punch? Momoa used that in Stargate Atlantis all the time.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:49 a.m. CST

    turd_has_risen_from_the_gravy

    by AsimovLives

    I fully agree wtih you. Milius had the right approach to the film. This new movie doesn't seem so.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:58 a.m. CST

    Conas a Barbada

    by AsimovLives

  • May 6, 2011, 5:13 a.m. CST

    Looks pretty sick

    by William

    Seriously. I'm excited for the film now. We need more hardass fantasy movies these days. The sets and costumes and locales are really inspired here. And the action looks great. Conan looks like a badass. Looking forward to it.

  • May 6, 2011, 5:53 a.m. CST

    asimovlives...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...you are a liar and an idiot. You either haven't read Howard's stories or were too dense to absorb them properly. I loathe Nispel's output so far and expect his Conan movie to be far inferior to the Milius film, but that still doesn't negate the fact that Nispel's movie so far LOOKS more like Howard's world and character than Milius' ever did. Why is this so hard for you to understand? Why are you so utterly incapable of understanding the notion that one can love the Milius film and still find it to be a poor take on Conan? <p> And your claim that Arnie was an agile fighter in the film is laughable. When did you last see Conan the Barbarian? He's a clumsy, oafish lug of a fighter in that movie. Say what you want about Momoa, but his Conan would cut Arnie's to ribbons before the Austrian Oak's sword ever left its scabbard. This is proof that you're insane. It's not enough that you love a movie and can't tolerate people having opinions that differ from yours, you also have to make shit up about the movie in order to hammer home cheap and useless points. <p> Now feel free to tell me to go kill myself like you always do, but I guarantee you others here wonder the same things about you and will continue to do so until you explain yourself -- if you're even capable of doing that without devolving into the drooling, ranting loon you always do when someone.

  • May 6, 2011, 5:56 a.m. CST

    when someone...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...calls you on your pretentious bullshit.

  • May 6, 2011, 6:01 a.m. CST

    Poor Jason Momoa

    by In Action Man Reborn Requiem

    He secretly wants to play Mr. Darcy in "Pride and Prejudice" but, alas he is type cast a barbarians and "noble savages".

  • May 6, 2011, 7:22 a.m. CST

    Momoa just looks so fresh looking

    by AsimovLives

    Sure, we can rationalise his natural darker tan skin colour because Conan spent most of his life in the wild, his skin burned by the sun. Many Conan stories deliberatly state that, specially those set in the eastern realms. But when white skinned people are tanned by the sun, a si have seen from many day laboureres, their skin doesn't look as smooth as Momoa's. People who had their skin sunburned, their faces always look parched. Not the fresh face that Momoa has. Momoa is, i beleiv,e in his early 30s, but he is still very youngish looking. He could play a young Conan as he is in the earlier Conan stories (early as in biographical, not as when REH wrote them). But i think a youngish Conan wouldn't had yet been tanned, since he spent his earlier life in the northern realms. Basically, what i'm saying is that they could had put some make up on Momoa's face to make him look like a man who had live most of his life in the wild. Like how they did with Guy Pierce in THE PROPOSITION. If Momoa is playing a younger Conan and if this movie is CONAN BEGINS, he should had to him a white pale of skin shade, if you know what i mean. I just think the people who made this movie just gave the role to a guy who's tall and muscled and looks pretty good in the photos and the women can lust over him, but other considerations where left wayward. I don't see a dedication to this film that Milius had with his, i'm affraid.

  • May 6, 2011, 7:43 a.m. CST

    That's ridiculous.

    by DocPazuzu

    So now his skin is too pristine and the wrong shade of tan? Why is it then that the Arnie Conan, after spending most his life chained to a wheel 365 days a year on the southern steppes, has skin even whiter and more pristine than Momoa's? And more importantly -- why isn't that a problem for you, asimovlives, if it's so important in this movie?

  • May 6, 2011, 7:53 a.m. CST

    iamanreborn

    by AsimovLives

    That was funny.

  • May 6, 2011, 7:55 a.m. CST

    Why not have Momoa in a movie where he plays Kamehameha?

    by AsimovLives

    He would be dead right for that role.

  • May 6, 2011, 7:56 a.m. CST

    docpasshole quer mamar no Momoa.

    by AsimovLives

  • May 6, 2011, 8:02 a.m. CST

    Oh dear.

    by DocPazuzu

    You know, asslives, I work at a library and we get lots of kids in who cause trouble. A lot of those kids speak more than one language due to their parents being immigrants. Some of those kids, after having been told off by us for misbehaving, start to hurl insults and curse at us in front of their friends in languages we don't understand. They think it makes them look cool in front of their buddies, but it is, in fact, one of the dumbest and least effectual things you ever do. Think about it: how can I possibly feel hurt or offended if someone's yelling at me in a language I don't understand? <p> "docpasshole quer mamar no Momoa." <p> Wow... could you be any more of a pussy?

  • May 6, 2011, 8:08 a.m. CST

    docpasshole, vai-te foder.

    by AsimovLives

  • May 6, 2011, 8:18 a.m. CST

    Fuck you, too, asslives.

    by DocPazuzu

    That one I knew. Still, you were hoping I didn't understand you which means you're a huge pussy. <p> Seriously, though... I draw attention to your double standards regarding Arnie's and Momoa's tan or lack thereof, and the only defense you can mount is "fuck you"? In Portuguese? That's known as debate fail, my friend.

  • May 6, 2011, 8:36 a.m. CST

    Goatfucker

    by Lost Jarv

    It's been a long time since I've beaten you with a cat o'nine tails made out of the hide of your favourite flock member, but you've really got it coming this time. Why are you so incapable of thinking in anything other than the most moronic binary form? I understand that you spend half your life sitting in the arsehole of Europe blowing your four legged friends, but really this is completely fucking dense even by your standards. You can, cretin, actually like something as what it is. It doesn't HAVE to be THE definitive version/ adaptation. What everyone is arguing about here is that, yes, the Milius Conan is a cracking film (any film where Arnie king punches a camel is bound to be), but it is also, simultaneously, not a particularly faithful Conan adaptation. I have a very limited knowledge of Conan, but even I can see that, much like you have a frightening resemblance to a special needs moron child eating a crayon, this version of Conan looks more similar to Howard's. Whether that makes it a better film is neither here nor there, and as not one of us has seen it yet, and I doubt there's some nascent technology that will allow it to penetrate your shite encrusted pointy dome, I doubt you ever will. You are a psued, a fraud and an animal molesting cunt, and in a rational world you and the flea infested country would be partitioned off from Europe and used for nothing more than a toxic waste dump. Mind you, given that MY fucking taxes are about to be used to bail you fuckers out to keep you in the shite-eating luxury you are accustomed to, it could fairly be said that we now fucking own you. Go fetch your shine box, bitch.

  • May 6, 2011, 8:39 a.m. CST

    I'm still laughing at the description of Arnie as "agile"

    by Lost Jarv

    What sort of deluded cunt would think that? He's not exactly Bruce fucking Lee is he?

  • May 6, 2011, 8:51 a.m. CST

    trailer not screaming at me one way or the other...

    by jpt

    Good or bad. I guess you could say I was expecting worse. But one thing I can say is that *this* Conan looks much more "agile" than Arnold's Conan. How that can be disputed, I do not know. Really Asi?

  • May 6, 2011, 9:50 a.m. CST

    docpazuzu

    by Cureguy

    I would respect you more if you did not like the film and were firmly in R.E. Howard's camp.You are being incredibly wishy washy. The fact is Milius's adaptation of Conan retains enough of the original character to make it an excellent "Conan" film.It is a film classic because of this fact and the skill of it's creators. And if you look at the color palette that Ron Cobb uses in the film it runs very close to Frazetta's vision of that world. The tan, ruddy browns and oranges are very close to the oils that Frank created which is what I believe people think of when they think of Conan.Let's see if you like this new film better for having a more "thematic" Conan. My feeling is that there is no possible way it's going to be better. And until someone creates "R.E. Howard's Conan The Barbarian" beat for beat, Howard fans are never going to be satisfied.*News Flash* That's never gonna happen! So quit whining, and realize film is a completely different animal than pulp fantasy novels.

  • May 6, 2011, 10:38 a.m. CST

    asimovlives

    by Omar B

    The question if Conan's dark skin is because his grandfather is southern and he's out in the sun a lot. The same grandfather that told Conan of all the "cities strung across the world like emeralds" that caused him to leave Cimmeria. People trying to say Conan is from Cimmeria so he must be proto-this or that, it's pretty ridiculous considering it's a fantasy world where his people descended from Atlantians. Or how about the people who would be considered black like the Stygians yet have straight hair and blue eyes, like Thoth Amon.

  • May 6, 2011, 11:48 a.m. CST

    cureguy

    by DocPazuzu

    Apparently you suffer from the same weird malady that asslives does. How exactly am I "wishy-washy"? That doesn't even make sense. <p> Are you in all seriousness suggesting that I appreciate the Milius film less than you because I don't consider it a true Conan film? If anything, my love for it is probably more genuine since I am able to appreciate it on its own terms rather than clumsily shoehorn Howard's mythos into it in order to validate it. <p> Also, please show me where I say I expect Nispel's effort to be a better film. In fact, I say the exact opposite, which you would notice if you actually read my posts. <p> "film is a completely different animal than pulp fantasy novels." <p> There is nothing to suggest that the general feel of a pulp story can't be translated to film. That's an idiotic statement. Just because Milius used the Conan franchise as an excuse to create his ponderous, dour fantasy "viking" epic doesn't mean a film in a truer pulp vein can't be created. The recent Solomon Kane is a perfect example of this. As is Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom to a large extent.

  • May 6, 2011, 12:17 p.m. CST

    I like it !!!!

    by pumaman

    Looks grainy, sexy and full of gore. Just like a Conan movie should be. Thank fuck it doesn't look like another Kevin Sorbo straight to tv or dvd shitefest ! They actually used a nice filter on the lens, much like Solomon Kane. I'm there by Crom !!!

  • May 6, 2011, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Actually looked decent

    by m_prevette

    EXCEPT for the Matrix-y / 300 Slow Mo fight stuff...I mean come on. Direct with some style, take a chance. But hey, it looked like it may be worth a matinee.

  • May 6, 2011, 4:30 p.m. CST

    docpazuzu

    by Cureguy

    You are being wishy washy because you can't have it both ways.You can't criticize "Conan the Barbarian" for not being a "valid" enough representation of Conan,then ridicule it as being "ponderous"and then profess your love for it in the same breath.Make up your freakin'mind bro! It has "Conan" as the title and source character.There can be no rejection of that fact.It does a well enough job in presenting him for most people and not just Howard purists.So,Milius's Conan will be the definitive "Conan" on film and NOT a generic Viking flick. As Arny's Conan would say "AND IF YOU DO NOT LISTEN, THEN TO HELL WITH YOU!"

  • May 6, 2011, 7:46 p.m. CST

    "LIAM NEESON IN STAR WARS: EPISODE III"

    by KilliK

    who gives a fuck?

  • May 7, 2011, 12:33 a.m. CST

    cureguy

    by DocPazuzu

    The reason you think I'm wishy-washy is because you're shallow. What you are in essence saying is that it's impossible to appreciate the Milius film for what it is -- a visceral, hard-hitting, operatic action film with philosophical overtones -- without first approving of it as a valid representation of Howard's work. In other words: any and all positive qualities I may find in the film are immediately invalidated by the fact that I think the film could just have well been called something else simply because the liberties it takes with the source material are too great. <p> And yes, compared to the pulp aspect of the source material, the Milius film is ponderous. That doesn't mean it's a bad film per se, but it's a poor pulp film. <p> I suggest you actually read Howard's stories.

  • May 7, 2011, 9:41 a.m. CST

    omar b

    by AsimovLives

    Conan's mix ascendency is not from REH himself, is it? It's from later stuff added from the writers who continued the Conan's stories, right? If i recall it correctly, it seems that REH didn't wrote much about Conan's earlier years, with only vague hints here and there. I have a colelction of REH's Conan sotries, and it seems that he considered THE TOWER OF THE ELEPHANT to be the earliest stoty in terms of Conan's own chropnology, in which he was about 17-to-19 of age. It's funny that REH's first publish story about Conan is where it shows him at his oldest. I think REH never told much about Conan's childhood. I seem to recall that some later author created a more detailed story about Conan's earlier years, his first battle and how he was captured and a slave until he mananged to escape his captors and thus began his wander lust. Or something like that. Many have claimed that the John Milius' Conan THe Barbarian movie is not mcuh of a Conan movie, for whatever precious reasons they have. Milius hismelf does admit in the audio comentary that did took elements from Krull for his Conan movie. So, unlike what many detractors of Milius movie think, Millius did knew about the stuff writen about Conan and also the other works by REH. Also, it seems that Milius found inspiration for the earlier years of Conan as depcited in the film from the stories and legends regarding Ghengis Khan, specially that of his father and family being murdered and spedning his earlier childhood as a slave. Ghengis Khan was also somabody who did mananged to go from slave to king by his own hand, as was also the kurishsh warrior Saladhin. Milius is a big military history nut, so would not be suprised if his knowledge of military history influenced how he depicted Conan in his movie, but also the whole approach to the movie. There's many Mongol, turkish and eastern elements in the movie, from the architecture, props, weapons, armours and costumes seen in the film. What i love about the movie is that despiste the occasional supernatural elements, it looks as if it's an historical movie. Which, i bleieve, is close to the intention of REH in his approach to the Conan stories. I think it was later authors, and influenced by the graphic artis who created the illustrations to Conan's stories, which pushed the fantastical elements more to the fore. Which seems to influence this new movie.

  • that were integrated into the movie. The story "Thing in the Crypt" was one of them. That was the part where Conan seeks refuge from the wolves in this cave where he finds a sword to fight back with. From what Orcus is seeing, this movie does not have that pedigree or even that love of detail as a wink to the fans. Basically it looks like Conan for those ignorant of it's literary originals who somehow just associate Conan with sword and sorcery just based on pop culture

  • May 7, 2011, 11:08 a.m. CST

    asimovlives

    by DocPazuzu

    Fail. <p> There is not one single Conan story written by Howard that doesn't have a sizable supernatural or fantastical element. Everything from the battles to the characters to the sorcery and Hyborian history -- all of it is larger than life and hews close to all the trappings of classic American pulp fiction. If you had actually read the stories instead of going to Wikipedia for your REH information you would have known this. <p> Milius USED Howard's work to make a film completely at odds with the nature of Conan as a character and with the form of the stories themselves. <p> Oh, and since you obviously haven't seen Conan the Barbarian for a very long time, let me refresh your memory: Conan spends most of his life, not just his early childhood as a slave, which is complete anathema to Howard's character. The whole point of Howard's Conan is that he represents the wild, the savage, and above all, the untamed. After the sacking of Venarium Conan left Cimmeria of his own free will, not after having been a slave, as you claimed. <p> Howard's Conan is an indomitable and savage man, a cunning warrior of enormous strength and speed, a speaker of numerous languages, highly intelligent and well-spoken, even if he hasn't been formally educated. <p> The Milius Conan is a clumsy, imbecillic man-child, ignorant of life and has lived as a slave for so long that he isn't even a barbarian any more. When he gets caught by Thulsa Doom, he blubbers like a bitch, gets crucified, dies(!), and has to get rescued by his friends. <p> Again: Conan the Barbarian is a fantastic film, but it's a terrible Conan movie.

  • May 7, 2011, 12:24 p.m. CST

    asimovlives

    by Omar B

    I would say that your assertion about his past is incorrect. sure the Conan stories start when he's in his early 20's having already left his village. But every single story fills in details about his past, if you read them all you'll get the whole origin. Just like we found out the first war Conan fought in was when he was 15 against the Aquilonions invading Cimmeria as recounted by him in Beyond The Black River. If one were to follow Milius he would have been tied to a wheel at this time and all his people would be dead ... except the Cimmerians were NEVER DEFEATED and Conan was never a slave. All the details of his early life are clearly scattered amongst the stories of REH. Or if you want you could read one of DeCamp's stories where he fleshed out details REH wrote and since he was the official author after REH I go with what he says too. Oh, and to build upon what docpazuzu said, Conan faces wizards, witches, monsters of all types, prehistoric beasts (including a dinosaur in Red Nails) and aliens in Tower Of The Elephant. Conan is as fantasy as they come.

  • May 7, 2011, 2:11 p.m. CST

    orcus

    by AsimovLives

    I haven't read THE THING IN THE CRYPT yet, but Milius inthe audio comentary says that in the original story there is indeed a demon or a devil that tries to kill Conan. In the movie, it becames a lyrical scene where Conan finds his warrior sword, and the skelleton of the atlantean king seems to bow to him, as if he was recogniging in Conan a fellow king. It's a nice nod to the idea that later in life Conan would became a king by his own merit. The thing that i love about Milius movie is that it's chokeful of little asides and interpretations. And thene's the duialogue, which in part became poetic, in a nob, i believe, to the way REH himself wrote his stories.

  • May 7, 2011, 2:29 p.m. CST

    omar b

    by AsimovLives

    I haven't read what that asshole Docpasshole wrote because that stupid fuck forgot what civility means. I gave up reading that cunt's posts. So i guide by what you posted. I admit that i haven't read all of REH Conan stories yet. So certainly there has to be some gaps in my knowledge of Conan's earlier years. From what i gathered, most of what's established in Conan's childhood was writen by later authors. And by establoshed, i mean more then just references and allusions that REH did. I wouldn't take what happened with Conan's village as a defeat of the cimmerians. It was an isolated raid agaisnt one small village, it was not a full time war agaisnt the whole nation and the whole people of Cimmeria. Seems the Cimmerians and the Vanirs and the Picts are mortal perpectual enemies. The childhood of Conan as depicted in the movie is a mix of various sourses. There's hints from REH stories, then there's parts that's from the childhood of Ghengis Khan, like the life in exhile and in slavery. The thing about Conan pushing a grain grind wheel is actually taken from a old italian silent 1914's movie called CABIRIA. That movie is considered to be the first real historical epic, which later influenced D.W. Griffith to make INTOLERANCE. In CABIRIA, one of the main characters is a big muscle guy called Mastiche. Audiences loving big giant mucled guys as heroes is not a thingof today, and Mastiche proved to be an imenselly popular character they made loads of sequels and sidequels about the character for the next 40 years. In CABIRIA, Mastiche is the faithful servant of a roman spy who is in a mission in Carthage. After many events, Mastiche is arrested and is tried to a grain wheel and forced to push it for twenty years or so. If you know CONAN THE BARBARIAN, watchign the movie does make that sequence pretty eerie, but that's because there's where Milius's movie took inspiration.

  • May 7, 2011, 3:02 p.m. CST

    So wait, all those years Conan was grinding grain?

    by orcus

    Granted, Orcus doesn't remember the commentary from years ago so this is a gap in Orcus' Conan knowledge? Serious? BTW, how many commentaries for CTB are out there? One thing that Orcus could never figure out is when a DVD is re released, do they use the same commentary for all the releases including BluRay? Some movies like Star Wars had one set of commentaries for the Definitive Laserdisc set and another for the DVD sets so Orcus was wondering if it was the same for other titles Orcus remembers fragments of a CTB commentary from YEARS ago (and mind you Orcus might have some of the details wrong) Where it was Arnie and possibly Milius. One fragment was that the actor who played Conan's father was a Government translator (FBI? CIA?) and another fragments was Arnie making a Joke about the probability of Richard Simmons having kids.

  • May 7, 2011, 3:09 p.m. CST

    Asi, Thing In The Crypt

    by orcus

    That story was in volume 1 of a 12 or 13 volume set that was put out in the 80's by a publisher called ACE. Here is what one of the series of books looks like: http://www.amazon.com/Conan-Wanderer-Ace-Vol/dp/B000LRA2RI/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1304798570&sr=8-1-fkmr1 please excuse the formatting. You might want to pick up the series since not only does it have the REH stories, but also has the story fragments fleshed out by August Derleth. If Orcus remembers correctly, it was laid out in chronological order and ened with "Conan of the Isles": http://www.amazon.com/Conan-12-Isles-Robert-Howard/dp/0441116205/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1304798929&sr=1-4 Orcus hopes this helps

  • May 7, 2011, 4:46 p.m. CST

    "the atlantean king seems to bow to him"

    by DocPazuzu

    Hahahaha, bowing? Really? Man, you can't even get that right, asimovlives. The only thing holding up the corpse of the Atlantean king, both literally and symbolically, was the sword. When the blade (the steel, if you need the movie's theme spelled out for you) was taken from him, the last vestige of his might vanished, leaving nothing but a crumpled and collapsed skeletal cadaver. Another aspect is the true secret of steel (as revealed by Thulsa Doom), namely the might of the flesh that wields the steel. With the dead king's flesh withered and dessicated, nothing could prevent the steel from being taken from him. <p> The whole movie is about might, the might of the blade and the might of the hand that wields it. <p> Bowing.... Jesus H. Christ.... <p> Oh, and I call bullshit on your claiming to ignore my posts. You address me often enough in other talkbacks -- that is, until I post something for which you have no defense at which point you say you're "above" dealing with me. Here's a tip for the future: If you're going to pretend that you don't read my posts, try to avoid actually referencing points I make. I don't know, it just seems more believable that way. <p> Bowing.... HAHAHA

  • May 7, 2011, 4:50 p.m. CST

    Not to nitpick, orcus...

    by DocPazuzu

    ...but The Thing in The Crypt was written by L. Sprague de Camp and Lin Carter.

  • May 7, 2011, 5:50 p.m. CST

    Really?? Now Orcus has to dig out his old copy

    by orcus

    Hmm, August Delrleth was part of that REH / HP Lovecraft clique. Sorry on getting that wrong if that was the case, but it still was based on a REH story fragment though. Hmm Orcus, Pazuzu, UNDERWORLD REPRESENT! Sorry, Orcus cannot resist bad puns

  • May 7, 2011, 10:23 p.m. CST

    asimovlives

    by Omar B

    See, the thing is, Conan's village and his parents are intact when he leaves. They are intact when he becomes king of Aquilonia because he does receive word from his family and several Cimmerians go south to join Conan's army. As for discounting things not written by REH, that's silly. It's like discounting Superman post Seigel and Shuster, Batman post Kane, Bond post Fleming (though I can tell you my favorite 2 Bond books are by John Gardner). Robert Ludlum left enough detailed outlines to publish 2 stand alone novels after he died and nearly 8 books in his ongoing Covert One series that started after his death with other authors expanding his outlines. Much in the same way if the REH people picked Carter or DeCamp to continue the works as well as expand some of REH's stuff then it's just as valid as Frank Miller's work on Batman or Allan Moore, etc.

  • May 10, 2011, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Re: Momoa/Bitching about CONAN

    by ArmageddonProductions

    Actually, since Momoa was basically playing some kind of monosyllabic mook on "Stargate Atlantis", he was probably a perfect fit for this role, and he at least visually comes off as what I always thought Conan would look like. Most importantly, English is his first language! Now, I'll finally be able to understand what Conan is saying!</p><p> I think you whiners all have very rose-colored memories of the original. Aside from the awesome score, the first CONAN was a piece of shite. It was badly directed by somebody who should have know a lot better, Arnold was almost unintelligible through most of the film, the "epic battle scenes" you keep going on and on about were badly executed and clumsily shot, and somehow, the final confrontation between Schwartzenegger and James Earl Jones manages to be even more lopsided than Wesley Snipes fighting Stephen Dorff in BLADE. Throw in some extremely cheesy (even by 1982 standards) special effects and bad dialogue and you have a movie that's actually probably worse than you're anticipating this one to be. I hate remakes, I hate Marcus Nispal's filmography and I hate that fucking piece of TRON: LEGACY score they keep reusing over and over again in every trailer that's come out so far this year, but this doesn't look bad. I'll be tuning in On Demand later this year ...

  • May 10, 2011, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Complaint

    by Absent Nine Times

    My sole complaint is the lately-much-overused-Matrix-lean-backwards-to-dodge-projectiles move. It will soon be called the "Wilhelm Dodge" because it's in as many frickin' films as the scream. Other than that, the movie looks incredibly okay. I did get an unfortunate Jonah Hex vibe from the trailer, though. I hope I am wrong.

  • May 10, 2011, 7:11 p.m. CST

    Wow

    by orcus

    Reading armageddonproductions post, kinda makes Orcus question who the real whiner was.

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