Movie News

Leonard Nimoy To Play Giant Robot In TRANSFORMERS 3!!

Published at: March 31, 2011, 3:05 p.m. CST

I am Hercules!!

Leonard Nimoy’s long-ago declaration that he’s retired from acting turns out to be a giant lie.

The actor, who of course played Galvatron in the 1986 “Transformers” movie, will voice Optimus Prime predecessor Sentinel Prime, who was found on the moon in 1969 and in “Transformers: Dark of the Moon” will turn into a firetruck.

Nimoy’s also expected to defy his own so-called retirement by reprising the role of the late William Bell on Bad Robot’s “Fringe” this season.

Does all this unexpected activity mean Nimoy's open to more acting work? Perhaps reprising Paris in “Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol”? Or Mr. Spock in “Star Trek: Horta Vengeance”?

Ehren Kruger, who scripted “Arlington Road” and the American “Ring” movies, takes over scripting duties, but the director is still Michael Bay, so it can still be perfectly horrible. And of course every opportunity Steven Spielberg takes to shove Shia LaBeouf down moviergoer throats is always welcome.

Find all of Entertainment Weekly’s exclusive on the matter here.

 

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Readers Talkback

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  • March 31, 2011, 3:07 p.m. CST

    NOOOOOOOOOOOO

    by DangerDave

  • March 31, 2011, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Shia's not bad.

    by Playkins

    Could be worse- a lot worse. Maybe he's got some annoying mannerisms, but he can definitely act.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:10 p.m. CST

    Herc

    by DangerDave

    hates him some Michael Bay it seems. ^5.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:10 p.m. CST

    Great News!

    by Mandolorian

    Guy has a great voice!! Should fit the old robot to a tee!!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:10 p.m. CST

    Sweet

    by Mr. Lahey

    This movie is looking excellent so far. ROTF was a misfire, but the first one was awesome, so I'll give Mr. Bay the benefit of the doubt.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:10 p.m. CST

    LOOK AT ME I'M A FIRETRUCK

    by DangerDave

  • March 31, 2011, 3:11 p.m. CST

    mr. lahey

    by DangerDave

    Michael Bay get out now.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:17 p.m. CST

    OK, From Spock Prime to Sentinel Prime?

    by Stalkeye

    How fucking redundant. BTW TF The animated movie is still better than Bay's recent abominations. At least the 86 Movie was a more faithful adaptation and by that I mean no silly comedic bits or Autobots hiding around Sam's House. Galvatron was badassery! Galvatron:"Correlation, Starscream? this is bad comedy". Starscream: "Megatron"? Galvatron: "here's a hint".. BLAAAMMMMM!!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:18 p.m. CST

    Leonard...

    by JustUsNerdsHere

    NOOOOOOOO!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:19 p.m. CST

    Gods let this not be an April Fool's joke

    by VAwitch

    I like it - although I think Nimoy would have been better suited for Shockwave. Haven't heard who is voicing Shocker yet. Peter David or Tony Todd would rock. For a crisper delivery, I'd love Bill Neighy.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:19 p.m. CST

    justusnerdshere

    by DangerDave

    NoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo0000000000000000000000OOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:21 p.m. CST

    The '86 movie kills anything Bay will make

    by kafka07

    and I watch that trailer with a tear in my eye that Bay shat on this great franchise. But I'm sure someday someone will just reboot it.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Also:

    by Mr. Lahey

    Shockwave. As for the original 1986 movie, it was cool when I was 11, but it's unwatchable now. Nostalgia is some powerful shit.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:23 p.m. CST

    YOU GOT THE TOUCH

    by DangerDave

    YOUR NOT MICHAEL BAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yeah!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:24 p.m. CST

    She says he had a great time working with Bay.

    by WriteForTheEdit

  • March 31, 2011, 3:26 p.m. CST

    So Sad Michael Bay

    by btc909

    You still can't top the animated movie from 1986.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:27 p.m. CST

    I am the Zarn!

    by Eddie_Dane

    God I loved that movie.

  • why can't I make em that *sniff* good. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

  • March 31, 2011, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Bay having a career the greatest april fools joke ever

    by alienindisguise

    because he sucks ass and has never learned how to make anything entertaining

  • March 31, 2011, 3:28 p.m. CST

    They could make Substitute V with The Coke/Whore budget for this Movie

    by SmokieGeezer

    Treat Williams IS Karl Thommason.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:29 p.m. CST

    Correlation... Coronation

    by trevoasisr

    stalkeye, Galvatron disrupts Starscream's coronation, not his correlation. Sorry to be a dick about it, but I watched that movie a million times as a kid, too.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:29 p.m. CST

    Judd Nelson! HA!

    by WriteForTheEdit

    I just watched the trailer; had no idea Judd Nelson did a voice! AND HE GETS TOP BILLING OVER LEONARD NIMOY AND ORSON WELLES!! FUCKING PRICELESS!!!!!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:30 p.m. CST

    It aint April Fool's Day yet!

    by DangerDave

    That Michael Bay.....always a day early and a dollar too much.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:30 p.m. CST

    Even Lenny gotta Eat.....

    by SmokieGeezer

    "I love Italian and so do you!"

  • March 31, 2011, 3:32 p.m. CST

    Will the Firetruck have flames

    by Phategod100

    Talk about Irony

  • March 31, 2011, 3:33 p.m. CST

    "Moviergoer II"

    by shran

    Even throatier!

  • March 31, 2011, 3:43 p.m. CST

    He and Shatner both turned 80 recently.

    by SnootyBoots

  • March 31, 2011, 3:43 p.m. CST

    he didn't lie...doing a cartoon voice is not "acting"

    by Rupee88

    yeah it takes a little effort...very little. He will just stand there in front of a mic and read aloud.

  • March 31, 2011, 3:52 p.m. CST

    Nimoy for Smaug

    by Ian Dolby

  • I bet many of you do

  • March 31, 2011, 4 p.m. CST

    melgibsoncalledmethenword

    by Uncle Pooky

    Not nearly as many of those idiots as there are morons who bash the movie here, and then line up opening day for it. You'll be there too. I'll save you a seat. We can do the popcorn trick.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:05 p.m. CST

    Leonard's gotta eat

    by D o o d

    but I will say it again. Transformers is bullshit!

  • I. The Terrible Trio and "The Kobe Project" CHOPPAH has learned, through sources anonymous and hidden, that Mr. Beaks, Nordling and Devin Faraci have been running a long game, using sock puppets to infiltrate and provoke talkbackers into ban-nable offenses to illustrate how Harry has lost control of his site and to purge any malcontents. It's all to usurp Harry, whom they view as a corpulent geek version of King Lear entering his dotage, and assume control of his site, his resources, and connections to turn AICN into perfectly functioning site with police-state-like talkbacks that would increase their personal wealth by whoring itself out to the studios. "It's obvious that Harry uses the site to get 'pweasants' from his studio buddies," one of my sources tells me. "But AICN still has its shaggy-dog, shambling charms. Beaks, Faraci and Nordling have been conspiring to turn the site into a pure revenue-generating machine." Their legion of sock puppets includes: JettL93, lowes forehead girl, chickengeorge, viggeo_morgenstein, william_faulkner and their oldest, most brilliant creation: hey_kobe_tell_me_how_my_ass_tastes, a churlish, thuggish reflection of how the trio views talkbackers. "They called it 'The Kobe Project,' or sometimes 'Project: Kobe,'" another one of my well-placed sources told me. "My God, do they laugh and laugh when they use the kobe_ass_tastes handle, or whatever the fuck it's called." All three of the conspirators share a password to use the kobe name, often at the same time, to infiltrate and rupture talkbacker "groups" such as the Baleback and its eventual offshoot, the Pedalback. Looking back now, using state-of-the-art textual analysis, it is obvious to CHOPPAH that kobe had to be the creation of more than one mind: he is often condescending, snobby, grumpy and despicable all within the space of a few minutes or posts. He is the love-child of a troika of pseudo-intellectual bullies, an avatar of their insidious, arrogant hive mind. But his deranged trio's plotting pushed their conspiracy to even darker territories. Desperate to find the ultimate coup de grace, especially as Harry's health problems grew to a near-critical phase while he was distracted by the Famous Monsters of Filmland website they coerced him into taking over, they despicably seized upon the death of beloved film editor and Quentin Tarantino collaborator, Sally Menke. They would make their power play in Menke's AICN obit. ... Tune in tomorrow for Part 2, "Where's Devin?"

  • March 31, 2011, 4:15 p.m. CST

    He's providing the voice of the explosion the

    by Dennis_Moore

    character devoid and unessential military guys run from.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:17 p.m. CST

    "One shall stand, one shall fall."

    by F-18

    "Why throw away your life so recklessly?" "That's a question you should ask yourself, Megatron."

  • March 31, 2011, 4:19 p.m. CST

    Reboot NOW!

    by BRUTICUS

    Can't wait for the reboot.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:21 p.m. CST

    they should save money....

    by Nice Marmot

    ....and use Anna Torv.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:21 p.m. CST

    Transformers 5

    by quadrupletree

    "Written by: No One" I LOL'ed at that...

  • March 31, 2011, 4:21 p.m. CST

    Another cool line from the 1986 movie.

    by F-18

    "I've got better things to do tonight than die."

  • March 31, 2011, 4:25 p.m. CST

    Chop my man ...

    by GINGE_MUPPET

    You are one fucked up little son of a bitch ....

  • March 31, 2011, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Trailer intro song and Boogie Nights

    by jr1623

    I had no idea the intro song on the trailer is the same song Dirk Digler sings in Boogie Nights. So classic!

  • March 31, 2011, 4:31 p.m. CST

    ginge_muppet

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    And there's more to come ...

  • March 31, 2011, 4:35 p.m. CST

    Go Choppa!

    by jarjarmessiah

    This is the greatest thing I've read since spidermanfreak's tirade about Cars. Alos I thing Achopalypse sounds better then Chopocalypse.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:42 p.m. CST

    Now all FRINGE needs...

    by tailhook

    is the Genesis Cloning Device to reconstruct William Bell from DNA, along with a hire of Dame Judi Dench to replace Dame Judith Anderson(since she's dead) to transfer his consciousness to his new body to make the Star Trek 3 horseshit complete! Wait... you think *THATS* what that idiotic machine they've been rebuilding does? It can not only seperate two universes(presumably destroying one)... its the only thing that can seperate William Bell from Olivia(Which is why shit-for-brains actually ends up using it).

  • March 31, 2011, 4:44 p.m. CST

    Shia LaBeouf as Dave Gahan. Do the Depeche Mode biopic!!!

    by wtriker1701

    Do it now, Steven! Chance of a lifetime! Everything Counts I Large Amounts!

  • March 31, 2011, 4:45 p.m. CST

    Obviously In not I... stupid talkbacker, wtriker, stupid!

    by wtriker1701

  • March 31, 2011, 4:47 p.m. CST

    Yeah I liked the 1986 movie

    by Phategod100

    for the 1st time it showed the consequence of a brutal battle. Important characters died gruesomely. It showed a lot of balls. And that ole Cash grab of a movie had more gravtitas then any moment in the those two rediculous "live action" disasters. And I go tick for tack if you want to start comparing silly nonsensical moments.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:49 p.m. CST

    I PAID GOOD MONEY AND WATCHED THE ANIMATED MOVIE RECENTLY

    by BADBOYBROM HC

    Fuck me that was hard work. Rose tinted spectacles guys. Still I do love that song You Got The Touch.

  • March 31, 2011, 4:50 p.m. CST

    This and his Fringe appearance will just be voice work I reckon

    by performingmonkey

    I can't see him being in front of the cameras again as William Bell, though we may hear his voice, recorded or otherwise. This IS a shame but it's Nimoy's decision and he should enjoy a happy, work-free retirement!

  • March 31, 2011, 4:55 p.m. CST

    Oh come on, Herc

    by D.Vader

    Shia is being "shoved down (our) throats?" Like every other actor who is in a lot of movies? Spielberg likes the kid, so what? Surely there's someone else more deserving of your ire. Like Katherine Heigl.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:03 p.m. CST

    Robots that transform into vehicles is highly illogical, Captain.

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    Fascinating.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:20 p.m. CST

    calling him a liar is pretty strong

    by Detached

    i doubt he lied. just changed his mind. big deal.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:29 p.m. CST

    @uncle pooky

    by montessaurus

    BWAHAHAHAHA seriously??? you lowlife - "YEAH RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU AT (INSERT PIECE OF SHIT MOVIE) ON OPENING DAY !!!" never cease to amaze me. Like... really? You're seriously going to presume that just anyone with an AIDSITKOOLZ account that disses on Micheal Bay's latest cinematic analrape is just going to be right there. With out 5 dollar popcorn and 3 dollar small soda. Fuck you, dude. What little disposable income I have goes to bottom shelf gin. No fuckin way am I going to be chest-bumping your fat-ass on opening day at a goddamn Micheal Bay Transformers movie. If anything, I'll pirate that shit, but I'll probably just be wanking to lesbian porn instead. in summation - fuck you and your presumption.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:30 p.m. CST

    With out = our

    by montessaurus

    NO AICN EDIT BUTTON = FUUUUUUUUUU

  • March 31, 2011, 5:35 p.m. CST

    Everyone should like Norm MacDonald, braindrain.

    by vic twenty

    Everyone except O.J. Braindrain, where were you the night of June 13, 1994 around 12:10am? And remember, this if for posterity, so be honest.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:37 p.m. CST

    "Megatron, is that you?"

    by Koborover

    "Here's a hint!" =BLAMMM= Awesome.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:37 p.m. CST

    DAMN YOU MICHAEL BAY

    by Damnyou

    DAMN YOU MICHAEL BAY

  • March 31, 2011, 5:40 p.m. CST

    @montessaurus

    by Koyaanisqatsi

    Since you have stated you won't be seeing the movie your opinion on anything relating to it is absolutely worthless in every imaginable way. Kindly leave now and never come back. Just get the fuck out, moron.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:40 p.m. CST

    Who cares

    by CT1

    I mean really, who gives a shit. Does the addition of Nimoy mean SHIT? Of course not, nobody gives a fuck, you might as well just go with a no-name and save the money because it will have ZERO absolutely ZERO IMPACT on the movie itself.. oh, that's right, all the stupid young teen girls and those stupid rowdy young macho boys which large "themes" in this franchise are aimed REALLY GIVE A FUCK ABOUT LEONARD NIMOY, all the kids just LOVE talking about Leonard NIMOY. Oh, and the redneck piece of shit demographic this "movie" is also aimed for will REALLY appreciate the subtle nuances that Leonard Nimoy will bring to the performance, that being of course if they even NOTICE, and if by some darwinian miracle one of them DOES notice, all it will do is pull him out of the movie and waste his brainpower for 3 minutes with "oh duh gee cool spock beam me up" instead of being absorbed in this wonderful racist hack SHIT world that has been created just for him. This is a brilliant move also for Nimoy and Star Trek fans, since people with brains that work LOVE Transformers, and don't find the movies GROSSLY offensive completely fucking DISGUSTINGLY putrid on EVERY FUCKING LEVEL. IT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER SO WHY EVEN BOTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • March 31, 2011, 5:47 p.m. CST

    @koyaanisqatsi

    by montessaurus

    Sorry if I got you all butt-hurt and stuff. Also, sorry that you're spending your time defending Bay-Formers - fucking loser. But atleast you didn't tell me you were "GONNA SEE ME THERE ON OPENIN DAY" so I guess that makes you the prettiest maggot on the latest billion dollar piece of shit.

  • March 31, 2011, 5:50 p.m. CST

    by Chunkybarcode

    Would that be Geishatron?

  • March 31, 2011, 5:51 p.m. CST

    by Chunkybarcode

    Would that be Geishatron?

  • March 31, 2011, 5:53 p.m. CST

    I'd love Shia shoved down my throat.

    by Prior Walter

    Too gay?

  • March 31, 2011, 5:54 p.m. CST

    also, @koyaanisqatsi

    by montessaurus

    do you do that on purpose - have some kind of incomprehensible name so that no-one bothers to respond to you? Well fuck you bitch, I'm biting. Who in the fuck are you to decide who can have an opinion on Micheal Bay's latest abortion? Fuck back off up to Bay's asshole you wannabe mod.

  • or any other piece of shit movie that mocks and pisses and shits on the very thing that made me well knownand respected. Money is not worth it. Fuck it," Now he's going to be in Michelle Bay's TRANNYFORMERS 3? Fuck that shit! Fucking hell, that is terrible news!

  • March 31, 2011, 6:02 p.m. CST

    Michelle Bay?

    by montessaurus

    Better than Jar Jar Abrams... maybe?

  • March 31, 2011, 6:02 p.m. CST

    Galvatron

    by GulDucati

    Why not just have Galvatron in the movie? Kill off Megatron in 3, then bring Galv in 4?

  • March 31, 2011, 6:09 p.m. CST

    Admirable effort there, Danny. Err...I mean Choppah!

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    You've thought it out and applied a thorough analysis. But we all know that Nordling and Beaks are just former TalkBackers who are trying to make a living and that Devin wouldn't go near this site without rubber gloves and a box of wet-wipes. But that William_Faulkner...yeah, he is/was a dick. He may be the only target worth considering as a legit sockpuppet on these boards. The timing of his appearance was highly suspect during that period.

  • March 31, 2011, 6:15 p.m. CST

    mr. nice gaius: Oh, there's more ...

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    The big reveal comes tomorrow.

  • March 31, 2011, 6:18 p.m. CST

    THANK FUCK

    by kwisatzhaderach

    that those talentless assholes Kurtzman and Orci aren't involved in this one.

  • I am honored by the mistaken identity, however. He is a True Master. A Professional.

  • March 31, 2011, 6:23 p.m. CST

    By the way, I, too, am on Twatter. @iamchoppah

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    Get to it!

  • March 31, 2011, 6:23 p.m. CST

    braindrain

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    Fuck those losers. You keep on CHOPPIN' in your own special way.

  • March 31, 2011, 6:35 p.m. CST

    Hangover 2 Trailer

    by blhotz

    ET just showed it! Someone upload it plz... watched it on a crappy TV!

  • March 31, 2011, 6:36 p.m. CST

    @mr. nice gaius

    by montessaurus

    sorry dude, but there is no way DGDB is this Choppah/Jesus wannabe. DCDB is way too intelligent to be this guy - (has a good thing goin at AIBN) TEH CHOPPAH'S posts are just redundant self-congratulatory blowjobs. Sorry, Chyop - but girl you know it's true.

  • March 31, 2011, 6:38 p.m. CST

    Didnt Ninoy voice the fallen?

    by Bass Ackwards

    I though he was the big bad in the last transformers?

  • March 31, 2011, 6:39 p.m. CST

    @the choppah AGREE

    by montessaurus

    DGDB is a professional. But you, you're just kind of irritating. Kudos for trying and all, but jeez0 man.. if anything, you're Harry's Id.

  • March 31, 2011, 6:56 p.m. CST

    @[dioxholster]

    by montessaurus

    then you would be finally validated for posting on AICN. But it would also be a shit-ass abomination of all that FUCKYEAHSTARGATE you really like. Alot. Pretty much it.

  • March 31, 2011, 7:27 p.m. CST

    Fire Truck?!?!

    by Delagoya

    Oh Bobcat Goldthwait, you're such a riot!

  • March 31, 2011, 7:28 p.m. CST

    [dioxholster]

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    I'm a huge Stargate fan, by the way.

  • March 31, 2011, 7:50 p.m. CST

    TF movie 1986

    by iceman199

    We need more dancing to Weird Al by junk robots. That is all.

  • March 31, 2011, 7:52 p.m. CST

    Shaking my head in disbelief at the garbage coming out of Hollyweird.

    by IronEagle74

    What happened to the days when great movies were made, especially great "action" movies? I'm going to go cry now.

  • Part II: The "Devin Faraci" Deception Beaks, Nordling and Faraci's plan took an unexpected turn when Devin, who had been appointed to rile up the talkbackers in the Menke obit talkback under the kobe_ass_tastes handle, ended up slipping on a greasy taco wrapper he dropped in haste as he rushed home to infiltrate the talkback. Devin cracked his head open on a rock, and he became comatose almost immediately. "It was nasty, man," said another of CHOPPAH's sources. "But Beaks and Nordling didn't care. They kept on going with their plan." Faraci's been in a coma ever since, and because he has no close friends outside of Nordling and Beaks, nor any family who cares, no one has bothered to notice that the REAL Devin Faraci has been rotting away in an LA hospital while Nordling and Beaks' newest sock puppet, "Devin Faraci," continues to blog, tweet and post on Facebook. "Look, I know Faraci is somewhat of a cunt, and a hairy, priggish cunt, at that," said a talkbacker who wished to remain anonymous. "But what DEƒUCK® are they thinking with this? First they create that tool kobe, and then this? A sock puppet for an actual living, breathing human? Despicable." Meanwhile, Nordling and Beaks went on to carry out their plan to exploit Sally Menke's death to purge the talkbacks of malcontents once and for all. Instead of waiting on hey_kobe_tell_me_how_my_ass_tastes, whom Faraci was scheduled to "drive" that day, they decided to make an example out of your faithful narrator, THE_CHOPPAH, and then they made a talkback saint out of D.Vader, dropping the Banhammer on both of us, among others. "In a way, their plan worked," said a former regular talkbacker who did not want to be identified by name. "Although the backlash might have ended up being too harmful in the long run. "Still, remember the wasteland the site became after Vades and others were purged?" he asked. "Or how william_faulkner was seemingly on every thread heckling anyone who dared stick up for Vades or you, CHOPPAH?" Indeed. CHOPPAH reminds you to also recall how "Devin" just happened to be posting on AICN regularly after betraying Nick Nunziata and CHUD while "he" waited to get "his" new blog up and running. This was none other than Beaks and Nordling carrying out their plan. So, all those talkbackers who suspected that Nordling was just a sock puppet for Devin Faraci? Wrong. It turned out to be the other way around. But Harry was powerless to stop their purges, nor did he want to, since he felt so strongly about Menke's death. Besides, Harry was about to enter the most dire stage of his rapidly declining health. And he didn't even -- couldn't even, really -- know what was happening right under his nose. It was uncertain whether he would recover, and Beaks and Nordling seized their opportunity. ... Coming tomorrow (or possibly tonight!), Part 3: The endgame, or a new beginning?

  • March 31, 2011, 9:56 p.m. CST

    Well

    by Lain Of The Net

    ...either Leonard or I is entering the dementia stage. I'll let you know after I stare at his autographed pic for a bit. Maybe I'll turn off the lights and look at the mirror and say some names (mine too) three times and see what happens.

  • Nordling and Beaks had to keep up the illusion that Faraci was still around and writing his particular brand of smarmy, contrarian trollery. So, the two of them, for whom smarmy, contrarian trollery isn't much of a stretch, continued to write under the name of "Devin Faraci" on his blog, Badass Digest, and his Twitter/Facebook accounts. If people knew what the real Devin was up to as he attempted to dash home that fateful day in September, they might begin to ask unfortunate, difficult questions. Still, as time wore on, and the rage over the D.Vader Purges, as they've come to be known in AICN lore, burned, a mysterious talkbacker by the name of Gabriel_Grays_Cumshot_Frenzy began to appear. He began trolling the boards pretty hard, hijacking them with bombastic pronouncements that he had evidence that "Faraci," who had been posting at AICN through the wiles of Nordling and Beaks, indulged in child pornography. Gabriel began to threaten AICN's servers with a massive attack if they did not stop posting "Faraci's" articles and reviews. However, CHOPPAH has now learned, through several deep background sources, that Gabriel Gray was the work of none other than Beaks and Nordling. "It was them all along," one of my sources confided in me. "They wanted to attack the site under Gabriel's name and URL -- and they succeeded for a while, if you remember -- to shake Harry down into streamlining the place, thus making it easier for them to patrol talkbacks and implement their plan to eventually merger with 'Faraci' and his new operation, the laughably, pathetically named Badass Digest." This tactic ended up working, as Harry, whose health continued to deteriorate, had no choice but to "reboot" the site, with a slightly altered design. Unfortunately, and I have yet to confirm whether this is a coincidence or not, many AICN users' handles and passwords were compromised and even stolen. The site was down for about a week while Harry and his crew fought to reforge it. Unfortunately, the damage was done, and Beaks and Nordling's plan crept toward its insidious conclusion. However, a fortuitous thing has happened since then. Beaks and Nordling's plan suffered a blow as Harry, recovering from life-saving surgery, continues to make an unexpectedly strong recovery while assuming more control of his site. Many of the older and better talkbackers have stayed away since late last year, but some have returned to reclaim their old places in the talkback pantheon, including the Legend Who Walks Among Us, D.Vader. Beaks, Nordling and their "Faraci" sock puppet are still plotting, though, waiting in plain sight for their next opportunity. Witness the resurgence of Beaks as a leading voice on AICN and his and Nordling's shameless plugs for "Devin's" blog, particularly on the Batman reboot post or the new Hangover 2 trailer post. "Devin's" post on Batman was infinitely more detailed and compelling than Beaks' AICN post, by the way ... ahem. Witness Nordling's sudden rise to prominence on AICN, as another example. Harry may be getting better, but his power over AICN isn't going to last forever. It's only a matter of time before Beaks and Nordling push him over to the sure-to-fail Famous Monsters for good. And until then, none of us are safe. Not even THE_CHOPPAH. Sweet dreams, my CHOPlings.

  • March 31, 2011, 11:36 p.m. CST

    Good reportage the_choppah!

    by room23storeblogspotcom

  • March 31, 2011, 11:49 p.m. CST

    True, creepythinmanlives.

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    That fucking GI Joe Movie theme song still gives me chills.

  • March 31, 2011, 11:49 p.m. CST

    Thanks, room23storeblogspotcom!

    by THE_CHOPPAH

    It was my pleasure.

  • April 1, 2011, 12:30 a.m. CST

    I loved the 1986 Transformers movie

    by room23storeblogspotcom

    Such a great story, music and characters. The ads really excited me seeing how much better the art was as compared to the already good show.

  • April 1, 2011, 5:13 a.m. CST

    True dat, Creepyman and Chop slice.

    by Stalkeye

    That fucking intro theme (GIJoe the Movie) fucking owned most animation themes and intros. "He never gives up, he'll never say die," 'walking tall with banners hiiigghh..' "to sound the battle cry: YO JOE, YO JOE"! Good movie even though i wasn't too happy with that Cobra La concept,the censored nude scene with Zarana and how CC just turned into a Snake. Also the fact that Duke survived a stake through the chest. (In a coma???) Atleast in the Japanese version, they killed him off. regardless, GIJTM is still better than that Rise of Cobra garbage. Props go out to Hasbro and Sunbow(Carol and Kirk respectively) for their hard work and not to mention the cool posters and memorabilia they had sent me many years ago. Yo mutha-fucking Joe!

  • April 1, 2011, 9:53 a.m. CST

    Will he have a beard, glasses

    by OSAMP1

    and nipples?

  • April 1, 2011, 10:42 a.m. CST

    Hey the_choppah

    by OSAMP1

    Nice read. Your posts were entertaining to say the least.

  • April 1, 2011, 10:58 a.m. CST

    LOL@ wtriker1701

    by Shaner Jedi

    Dave Gahan! LMAO!

  • April 1, 2011, 12:09 p.m. CST

    Leonard Nimoy is married to Susan Bay, cousin of Michael Bay.

    by AsimovLives

  • April 1, 2011, 12:11 p.m. CST

    [dioxholster]

    by AsimovLives

    Michael Bay never did a proper movie, anyway.

  • April 1, 2011, 2:13 p.m. CST

    @AL: I still love Armageddon and The Rock!

    by wtriker1701

    Both are true popcorn movies!

  • April 1, 2011, 2:27 p.m. CST

    "Nimoy for Smaug"

    by buggerbugger

    Fuck, no. You can hear his dentures when he speaks.

  • April 1, 2011, 2:30 p.m. CST

    Oh BTW..

    by Stalkeye

    Quote: "you people liked the fact the animated movie killed off every likeable character and replaced them with robots we didn't care about?" Well, Ryan suffice to say, that the deaths of likeable characters such as Wheeljack, Ratchet, Starscream and of course Optimus Prime made the movie more interesting if not "realistic". The cool guys can't always ride off into the sunset or steal the spotlight. Too bad I couldnt take Prime's "death" seriously in ROTF (or to a lesser extent, Jazz in the first TF Film.) let alone the entire Movie. Apologist my arse, I'm just stating the obvious: TF 1986 outclasses Bay's wankerfests. Deal with it.

  • April 1, 2011, 3:38 p.m. CST

    Nothing new--TBers bitching about Bay

    by Tell_Your_Mom_I_Said_Hi

    Nothing new on opening day either, they will be sitting in the theatre paying (translate: sucking Bay's dick) to watch the movie.