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Maybe The Behind the Scenes Pic of the Day wants to capture us and torture us to death?
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here with today’s Behind the Scenes Pic!
Conan The Destroyer is not a good movie. It really isn’t and when I listen to the awesome John Milius/Arnold Schwarzenegger commentary track on Conan The Barbarian I’m always under the impression that Schwarzenegger thinks back on both movies as the same film, mixing them together in his mind. When he’s not dropping amazing insight like “Dis is where da dogs are chasing me” as Conan runs from dogs, he’s constantly sounding surprised that Conan The Barbarian is a good movie. The reason for that, I believe, is that The Destroyer tainted his memories of the whole series.
But as bad as The Destroyer is, I think we’re all going to be wishing for it whenever Marcus Nispel’s remake hits screens later this year. That movie looks gut-fucking awful.
Conan The Destroyer is cheesy, silly, stupid, but kinda fun. All of that and more is represented in today’s picture of Governor Schwarzenegger playing around with Grace Jones.
Enjoy the pic!
You will dig tomorrow’s Behind the Scenes Pic! Can you? I think you can.
-Quint
quint@aintitcool.com
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Readers Talkback
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I bet her vagina is bigger than my dick
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it still surprises me as to how they can even think abt remaking this film
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I learned a friend who has had a lifelong fear of Grace Jones. She is one frightening woman, and I use that term loosely.
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March 28, 2011, 12:03 a.m. CST
"Whah!!...with dee no lube and tings like that there!!"
by Cheif Brody
Ahhhh...The deleted scene where Conan is anally raped.
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but if it is a Behind the Scenes Pic column I guess we had to get it out of the way eventually.
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If so,fuckin awesome! Well,I mean,what can I say that hasn't been already said about the warriors? My two cents are it's a perfect movie that's just fuckin badass,and no remake.Please. Conan pic is cool,Conan The Barbarian is till one of the best 80's action/fantasy flicks and is it's own thing aside from others in the genre. Oh and double major cool points for the OUATITW and TGTBATU pics from the past 2 days.
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BLECH! Just make it a barbarian movie and leave Conan's name out of it. Just call it Deathstalker: 2011 or something. It could have a good chance at being the best Deathstalker movie (Unless it is MST3Ked). I have nothing against the lead but the whole thing just looks off, and it really is probably because it has the name Conan on it. Conan IS Arnold. You can hate Arnold all you want but the man owned some roles that will have to wait to be refilled until his hits are kind of forgotten. Maybe in like 30 years. He obviously isn't the best actor in the world but the man has charisma and for certain roles, is untouchable. You are far better off going the Predators route if you are gonna try and work in the shadow of Arnold and just go a different hero direction. The new Conan may very well be entertaining or even great, we don't know, but you automatically put yourself in the shadow of a great film, and that's a misstep IMO.
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..but I still like it. Although I think we can all agree Basil STILL fucking killed it. WAY more than the movie deserved.
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March 28, 2011, 12:35 a.m. CST
Grace jones is the only person who could take Arnold from behind
by Six Demon Bag
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But young Olivia D'abo as the princess sure helped ease me through puberty..
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The best is the scene where Conan is practicing swordplay in the East and the martial arts master kicks his training partner in the nuts after he laughs at Conan during a lesson. Arnold says "HA HA HA....I forgot about DAT!!! He's not laughing anymore!
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i watched it as a kid.Still it's not that bad.silly yes but probably better than the new upcoming movie. Oh and Grace Jones? well yeah i would hit it,just to see if i could tame it.
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March 28, 2011, 1:43 a.m. CST
Dolph fucked Grace Jones and lived to tell about it.
by caruso-stalker217
A true legend.
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Don't be shocked if Arnold slept with her, if you focus on her face, she's not ugly. It was her haircut, clothes and persona, that threw people off. Grace Jones used to date Dolph Lundgren, Dolph was her boyfriend slash bodyguard. His very first screen appearance was a bit part in "A View to a Kill".
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Seriously!
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Yep. It destroyed any chance of a third Ahnuld Conan movie. After the awesome sauce that was Conan the Barbarian, CTD was pretty much...... Shit. And I'm actually not actively dreading the new Conan. It could very well be a nice thick shit sandwich, but there's the tiniest little nugget of a chance it could be alright. Howard's actual writing could honestly be adapted in a far more true way. Conan was never a slave. He left home because he WANTED to. He was just that much of a bad-ass. No giant grain-mashing wheel necessary. The fucker was born on a battlefield.
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Conan the Destroyer might not be as good as the first one and sure, it´s for the kids. But still, it´s a fun movie to watch saturday morning. And it has miss Olivia, so it´s alright. That chick was so hot. Fuck, still is! I want her to be my wife.
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it has it's moments. The only thing that ever really bugs me while watching it is the Malak character. He's just out of place.
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March 28, 2011, 4:02 a.m. CST
you know what's bad? That stupid Skyline pop up ad on this site.
by DrPain
How can you guys promote that crap? How can you sleep at night???????????????
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And one of the greatest ever scores too. No way the Nispel shitfest will top it.
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Great to put on when friends are over for some laughs, Both Milius and Arnold sound very stoned, and Arnolds 'insights' are just fucked. Milius will talk for 10 minutes about a scene, giving interesting insight into the filmmaking process, only to be punctuated by Arnold piping up with 'Hey look at da horses!'. I fucking howled laughing the first time I played this commentary. There should be an Arnold commentary track on every movie, whether he was involved in it or not.
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drpain, Malak was that scrawny little sidekick guy right? He did make for one good comedy moment when Conan, after an epic struggle, kills the giant one-horned monster. The music rises to a crescendo as Conan plunges in his sword. Then Malak comes over to the dead monster, plunges in his little dagger and he gets the same epic music cue repeated.
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March 28, 2011, 7:27 a.m. CST
Casting Wilt Chamberlain as the protector of Princess Jehnna's "innocence?"
by Shut the Fuck up Donny
And the scene with Malak referred to by cobra--kai? Hilarious. Don't tell me that movie wasn't deliberately trying to be goofy. And I love it for that very reason.
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Bet he tagged both Olivia and Grace off set. The relationship between Bombaata and Princess Jehnna basically plays like softcore porn.
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It's really quite jarring actually. The worst part is the mention of the camel (referring to a scene from Barbarian). You think, dude, you weren't even there. It's obvious the role was written with Subotai in mind. Anyway, Destroyer is a diverting little Swords and Sorcery film, in the mould of "The Sword and The Sorcerer" or "Krull". Barbarian, on the other hand, was a true epic, a heavyweight masterpiece. Both have their place. As for Olivia, she would be fun for a few hours, but I will take Valeria any day of the week. Valeria is a woman you could trust.
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Still hate it. Grace Jones....you have to be slightly nuts to stick your cock in that.
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If you do not compare it to the Arnold films (which you shouldn't since its NOT a fucking re-make) then it works. Granted there has been virtually no footage released but everything I've seen so far looks like its a lot truer to Robert E. Howard's Conan than CTB or Destroyer ever even tried to be. I give them props for casting an actor who actually fits Howard's description of Conan in the first place and not an Arnold clone. Arnold is the fucking man, Conan The Barbarian is a masterpiece but if you know your facts you cannot dispute that Arnold was MIS-CAST as the Cimmerian from day one. They turned it into something great but THAT IS NOT CONAN. Nispel has a bad track record but condemning this movie already is pre-mature. They've made all the right choices from what I've seen so far. Its seems like they're trying to establish something closer to the Dark Horse comic and REH's original stories. The revenge plot is there just because that's what non-Howard fans have come to expect but all this "Arnold is the only Conan" talk is bullshit. It would be like saying "Fuck Christian Bale, I was a big fan of the Adam West show and that guy is the only Batman, Fucking fuck The Dark Knight Rises!".
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Seriously, how people can trash a movie based on a teaser that shows Momoa swinging a sword around and then a couple of flashes of the bad guys all in a haze of smoke for about a minute with a voice over? Oh wait, it's AICN where snap judgement rules, and lameness prevails.
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I know it's more kid-friendly (sort of) compared to the first one but still.... When I was around 11 or 12, me and a couple of buddies of mine had this flick memorized; Mako was cool, Olivia D'Abo was hot, Wilt Chamberlin looked good (we thought) in his part, the film score was great, the sword fight Arnold had with Sven-Ole Thorsen was rewatched over and over, some of the dialogue was recited over and over.... Hey, maybe I'm less critical than the rest of you, but I have fond memories of this one.
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Either that, or Conan punches a lot of camels.
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March 28, 2011, 9:31 a.m. CST
My brother in law made out with Grace Jones at a party once
by Batutta
The Conan commentary is classic. My favorite is when Arnold asks if the young version of him is wearing lipstick in the opening scenes.
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March 28, 2011, 9:47 a.m. CST
I still enjoy it as cheesy fun. I'm still waiting for an extended Director's Cut.
by Mr Nicholas
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Good or bad as a film, I had a strange crush on Olivia d'Abo when I saw this film in my youth. I have a hard time disliking this film because of that.
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This movie didn't suck. How can a movie with the delicious treat that is Olivia d'Abo suck? OMG, yum yum yum!!! She's so fine, she's so fine, she's so fine, she blows my mind... On a separate note, what's stuck in Grace Jones teeth in this pic? Yikes!
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Being fair I wouldn't say the film sucked at all. It wasn't even a patch on CTB, not even close, but it was a reasonably diverting 90 mins. Even Red Sonja wasn't terrible - although I wish they had just called Arnie's character Conan and had done with it. And yes, d'Abo is fine. But like I say, I'll take Sandahl Bergman from CTB any day of the week!
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I loved the way using magic made him look like he was taking a massive shit!
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Do you realize that she was 15 at the time of the films release? So maybe even 14 at the time it was shot? Guys, you are furiously tugging yourselves off over a 14 year old girl.
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I was thinking The Warriors, but maybe it’s a behind the scenes picture of Gene Wilder in blackface.
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Anyone ever seen the two together at the same time? I remember the first Blade trailer...I seriously thought it was a new Grace Jone's flick.
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March 28, 2011, 11:23 a.m. CST
Haaahhgliiiiii!!! Sheeze ghot da phole round muh neck dere!
by UltraTron
Dish iz soh fuhnee!
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Yeah she was hot in that movie when it first came out and I was 13-14 at the time. Destroyer is not a bad movie at all. It's just not as good as the first one. But seriously, it's fucking better than a lot of sword and sorcery stuff.
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Conan the Barbarian is not a great film. It's a B-movie trying to be an epic and just didn't work for me. I hope the new Conan is closer to R.E. Howard's Conan.
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TO KRUSH YUHOR ENEMEEZ, ZEE DEM DRIVEN BEFUOH YOUH, AHND HEER DE LAMENTATIONS OF DEE WIMMEN!
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If you have not heard that commentary DO IT! DO IT NOW! COMEON! KILL MEEEE!!!
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"UUUURRRRRAAAAAAHHHHHIIIIIAAAAAAUUUUURRRR" Nobody does that better than Ah-nuld.
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I always wished they would adapt the REH stories, which were truly awesome. But Gerry Lopez....yeah, man! Didn't they dub his voice though?
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but i agree i wanted to fuck the shit out of her. Hottest 14 year old ever on film.
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In a pink leotard no less. I'd fuck Grace Jones, if I didn't have to move her cock to the side.
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March 28, 2011, 2:05 p.m. CST
Surely the new Conan movie will most likely not top Conan The Barbarian, but
by lv_426
to say it doesn't have a chance at being better than Conan The Destroyer is a bit of a stretch. Destroyer sucked so bad it makes my head hurt. And to add insult to injury, it is even more tragic that Destroyer had to follow the John Milius Conan.
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She laid a wicked 1-2 (Conan and Bolero) on me as a kid. I was younger than her at the time...so save it.
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period.
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AIGNYAIYAIYAIAYAINGYUH* *Pro Tip: If you take the first two fingers of each hand, place them inside the corners of your mouth and stretch your mouth out real far, then make this sound, you can do a close approximation of Ahnold depressurizing on the surface of Mars! Great Parties! Fool your friends!
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Jovovich's commentaries. I love in Resident Evil when she says "Rewind that! You can totally see my boob!" Anderson: "We can't rewind it. We're doing the commentary."
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for the new conan movie I don't think it looks bad Also that poster was fantastic
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That is all.
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Later in the movie when he and Valeria are, um, consummating their relationship, when he says "Wow, I get laid a lot in this!" Practically fell off the couch...
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