Ain't It Cool News (
Movie News

Warren Beatty Retains Rights To DICK TRACY!

Nordling here.

Warren Beatty's DICK TRACY, I think, has grown in estimation over the years.  Released in 1990, it was an antithesis to the previous year's Tim Burton BATMAN film - while the former was gothic and dark, Beatty's DICK TRACY actually felt like it was from a comic book, or the Sunday paper spread.  Richard Sylbert's amazing art direction is still jawdropping even today.  With its bright colors and cartoonish villains, Beatty actually did a fine job directing as well as playing the square jawed hero, who can fight crime without a blink of an eye but can still lock up around his true love, Tess Trueheart.  The film harkens back to a simpler time, and I'd say the one real flaw in it was Madonna, who just didn't have the skills or screen presence to pull off the dialogue.  But other than that miscast, the film still works.

And now, according to Deadline, his longstanding suit with the original rightsholders of the comic, Tribune Co, has been settled in a summary judgment that gives film rights to the character back to Beatty.  He's struggled for a few years to keep those rights, and the only reason that comes to mind why is that he might return back to the comic and make another DICK TRACY film.  He's 74 now, and too old for the part, but that shouldn't keep him from directing or producing another DICK TRACY.  And now that he's clearly established himself as the rights holder, he's free to do what he likes with it.

It's a cynical time right now.  I think upcoming films like CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER are going to do amazing business because I think people are tired of cynical and they want heroes they can believe in.  DICK TRACY is one of those kind of films, and I'd love to see Warren Beatty return to filmmaking regardless.  He's still one of our best actor/directors and with the glut of comic book movies right now, 21 years later DICK TRACY still holds up.  I'd love to see that world realized onscreen again.

Nordling, out.

Readers Talkback
comments powered by Disqus
    + Expand All
  • March 25, 2011, 8:59 p.m. CST

    cool by me

    by mattforce7

    bring on the coats of glory

  • March 25, 2011, 9:01 p.m. CST

    Warren Beatty gonna be teaching the Kid?

    by coolenough

  • March 25, 2011, 9:01 p.m. CST

    The question on most people's minds...

    by Ronald Raygun

    When (if ever) will they release the oft spoken of extended edition on Blu-Ray?

  • March 25, 2011, 9:02 p.m. CST

    When do we eat?

    by Nasty In The Pasty

    When do we eat? When do we eat? When do we eat?

  • March 25, 2011, 9:03 p.m. CST

    Too old-fashioned

    by MediaGold

    Dick Tracy is as dead a character as Popeye, Little Orphan Annie, and anything Rob Liefield made in the 90's. It was out of date already by decades when it was released in 1990. No way would anyone want to risk money on a new Dick Tracy. The guy's name is a penis, fer crissakes! And his surname is a woman's name. Might as well make a movie called Phallis Susan.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:06 p.m. CST

    My favorite character in the movie was always Mumbles


    As a kid I remember hearing that the action figure for the Madonna character had to be pulled because it gave away the ending (ie, Madonna is the bad guy without a face). i'm guessing that figure must be worth quite a bit these days.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:22 p.m. CST

    Bring on the sequel Warren!!!

    by brocknroll

    Warren, if you're reading this somehow, I would love a Dick Track sequel. I'm pretty sure Warren can still play the character with no problem. If Harrison Ford can still play Indiana Jones at that age, then why not Warren can play Dick Track again?

  • He kept the rights from reverting back to the publisher by filming a half-hour interview on TCM wearing the Dick Tracy costume. That's it. The publisher argued that he hadn't done anything with the character in decades, and that ass-hat plays dress-up for an interview and successfully argues that he's still producing movies and/or television shows based on him. If that's the standard of making use of a character's rights, then kiss goodbye any chance of Marvel ever getting their assorted rights back, regardless of whether Fox goes 20+ years without making a film on the characters. Seriously, fuck Beatty. As if his little stunt was at all in the spirit of the agreement when he signed on to make use of the character.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:26 p.m. CST

    Can we PLEASE get a blu ray of this movie??

    by darthwaz1

  • March 25, 2011, 9:30 p.m. CST

    Its time...time for THE DARK DICK RETURNS!!!

    by Jobacca

    Dick Tracy...old and wrinkled,like all 70+ dicks should be. Then one day during dinner at the old folks home,the now-leathery and senile Tess Trueheart accidentally slips some Viagra into his Prune(face)juice and BAM-the now harder,tougher Dick Tracy comes out of retirement to clean up whatever city Dick Tracy took place in....but only for four hours at a time...any longer than that and he has to consult his doctor. But yeah...Beatty is a dick for squatting on the rights...heres hoping he dies soon so someone who actually wants to do something with the character has the chance.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:31 p.m. CST

    Beatty always wanted to do a director's cut...

    by Bladerunner751

    he was never happy with the theatrical cut of the flick and has been trying to do an extended cut for years. Now he can finally do it. The original script for the film was very good, much better than the movie that was released.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:32 p.m. CST

    Re-watched this TWO days ago!

    by happybunni

    Yeah I don't remember it being that freaking colorful as a kid, but it was. Also I was surprised at how many well known actors were in it, like Mumbles... And Madonna played her role pretty well, there wasn't much chemistry between her and Dick, but the lines were witty and hilarious and full of innuendo. She did sultry VERY well.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:33 p.m. CST

    He loves himself - he wants to play Dick again.

    by JuanSanchez

  • March 25, 2011, 9:34 p.m. CST


    by Meadowe

    Just a picture of Dick Tracy (not even Beaty, mind you, just an illustration, and his facial features weren't even clearly defined), looking at his coo' telephone watch, with his trademark yellow hat and coat, with the words I'M ON MY WAY or something to that effect. Very simple, yet effective and elegant.

  • You're welcome.

  • Beatty was not a good choice for the character.

  • March 25, 2011, 9:38 p.m. CST

    The comic adaptation was done by the great Kyle Baker!

    by Admonisher

    Together with writer Len Wein, he did two prequel books and turned it into a trilogy. It's terrific! (The prequel stories are better than the film they set up, IMHO.)

  • March 25, 2011, 9:46 p.m. CST

    one of the best comic films ever!!!

    by JaredP

    HANDS DOWN!!!! i loved seeing so many great actors in various roles. al pacino, warren beatty, dustin hoffman, r.g. armstrong, dick van dyke, james caan and madonna i don't agree with nordlings assessment of her performance. this was one of her BETTER films

  • March 25, 2011, 10:13 p.m. CST


    by BizarroJerry

    The Dick Tracy comic strip just got new creators after 30 years, like a week or two ago. In the brief run of the new guys -- a veteran comic book writer and artist -- the strip already seems to be greatly improved.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:25 p.m. CST

    Well, the problem was the script...

    by Chewtoy

    ...the bad story structure, poor pacing and misguided decisions. The climax where every villain drives out of a garage one by one into a completely unexciting hail of machine-gun fire pretty much epitomizes this.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:28 p.m. CST


    by F-18

    I like the original Dick Tracy movie. If I want to see it again, I'll rent it. I am not going to pay out the ass at the theater to see another version of it. A remake will probably be a 3D money grab, too.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:34 p.m. CST


    by Tristan

    Never got through Dick Tracy. I think Madonna being anywhere near it was a turn off. Where other people see a sexy vixen or whatever, I see a stringy, cold-hearted businesswoman who has been taught act sexy by a choreographer. Desperately Seeking Susan is a good movie mainly because she's not in it that much. Mmmm - a rotoscoped Tracy is a pretty cool idea. But why not skip the movie and make that a TV show on AMC or something?

  • March 25, 2011, 10:34 p.m. CST

    Dick Tracy = One of the best and truest comic book movies.FACT.

    by KilliK

  • March 25, 2011, 10:46 p.m. CST

    Best looking comic film EVER...

    by Dr. Egon Spengler

    It looked like a Sunday strip came to life. But we don't need another Dick Tracy movie. Move on Warren, move on.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:47 p.m. CST

    killik, I don't know whether it's "cool" to hate her

    by Tristan

    but you'd have to admit that she has been in terrible movies. That's just general consensus.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:48 p.m. CST

    And Madonna was perfect in that role...

    by Dr. Egon Spengler

    Did that bump in your pants from watching her on screen distract you from the movie too much Nordling? Don't be ashamed, it happens to the best of us.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:49 p.m. CST

    This may be a problem unique to me,

    by Greggers

    but over the years. I've come to the realization that even well-executed stylization can become a to much of a barrier to my emotional connection to a story. DICK TRACY, like SKY CAPTAIN AND THE WORLD OF TOMORROW, was a very stylized (and *very skillfully* stylized) pastiche. With it's strict adherence to the 4 color palette, it looked interesting; sometimes even amazing. But at the end of the day, it felt artificial, and for me, this alienated me from the story and the characters I was supposed to care about. Ulitmately, I just didn't buy into the world on it's own terms, and the whole thing was more of a visual exercise. (And again, the sentiments can be applied equally to SKY CAPTAIN.) So if they do decide to do another DICK TRACY, I'm hoping they will have gotten the literal-minded art direction out of their system, and that they steer towards something with a little more visual verisimilitude.

  • March 25, 2011, 10:54 p.m. CST


    by Meadowe

    Or Gabriel Macht, he did the best you could do with that pos The Spirit.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:09 p.m. CST

    Madonna sucked...

    by kiwicanuck

    I agree with Nordling, but only partly. Her acting sucked, but then so did Beatty's. And god DAMN, I'd never thought she was particularly hot until I saw her in this. Even with her shitty line readings, that almost sheer black body stocking thing she sported is by far the most memorable part of the movie. What a bod.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:16 p.m. CST

    Dustin Hoffman as Mumbles was

    by Teddy Artery

    pretty good and his performance got a great laugh out of me and the audience what I seen it with (pardon my hillbilly grammar).

  • March 25, 2011, 11:29 p.m. CST

    I loved Dick tracey as much as Burton's Batman.

    by room23storeblogspotcom

    It would be great to get another one! I actually liked Madonna in it also.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:30 p.m. CST

    Fell asleep

    by cyberuck

    Dick Tracy is the only movie I've seen in the theater that made me fall asleep. I have no recollection of any part of it. I woke up when the end credits rolled. Was it any good? Cool story, bro! (took care of that for ya).

  • March 25, 2011, 11:30 p.m. CST

    fuck i feel old..

    by DJJester

    21 years? REALLY? wow.. and I can't believe he's 74... I loved Dick Tracy when it came out, had a blast with it, granted I was a kid and I havn't seen it since it came out on Video Cassette, I should probably Netflix it.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:31 p.m. CST

    De Palma WOULD have made a great Dick Tracy movie

    by Nasty In The Pasty

    Hell, The Untouchables pretty much IS an R-rated comic book thriller, right down to the boy-scout earnestness of Costner's performance and De Niro's grandiose mugging as Capone. Considering his visual pizazz, it's funny to me that De Palma has never been tapped to make a comic book adaptation. Then again, he's a filmmaker who has made very few PG-13-level movies, so studios probably wouldn't let him blow $200 million on an R-rated property.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:32 p.m. CST

    Anyone else remember Beatty's Red Carpet fiasco at the Oscars?q

    by D.Vader

    I say he was COMPLETELY wasted on booze. My gf thinks he's just deaf. Either way, you could see Annette Benning was fucking PISSED at the way he was speaking during the red carpet interview for the network. I don't think anyone understood his slurred words.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:34 p.m. CST

    and Sondheim

    by ArcherNX01

    Don't forget, Sondheim won an Oscar for his work on Dick Tracy. He's still working too (though he just turned 81). The Kid (Charlie Korsmo) will definitely NOT be back. He's a tea-party conservative, which Beatty would not abide... oh, and he left acting too. Which might be a factor.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:37 p.m. CST

    As as for Beatty's film...

    by Nasty In The Pasty

    ...I remember liking it a lot at the time, but hell, I was just turning sixteen when it came out. Just like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie that came out the same year, I've had no real desire to revisit Dick Tracy in the two+ decades since, as I imagine I'd have a Nostalgia Critic-like meltdown over how disappointing the films would be to my jaded, mid-30's intellect. Now The Rocketeer still holds up (or at least it did when I watched it last around 2004 or so), because it didn't try so hard to look "comic book-y" and it had a pre-anorexia Jennifer Connelly.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:38 p.m. CST

    Wow I've been waiting so long...

    by KHjLL

    Still remember the first time I saw it the theater... So amazing always wondered why FILMS didn't take the art direction from DICK TRACY... So colorful all the villians were spot on... Who better than than one of the Original Gangsters of Hollywood to bring back the creation he started... Hope they get the ball rollin on this one...

  • March 25, 2011, 11:39 p.m. CST


    by KHjLL

  • March 25, 2011, 11:45 p.m. CST


    by Raskolnikov_was_framed

    great in Dick Tracy and A League of their Own...everything else...shit

  • March 25, 2011, 11:56 p.m. CST

    Madonna was hot back in the day

    by F-18

    but she looks like a gargoyle now.

  • March 25, 2011, 11:58 p.m. CST

    by F-18

    or something that's really ugly

  • ...but she's aged HORRIBLY. Hell, everybody ages, but I can still look at Elisabeth Shue today and get it up, whereas Madonna and Jennifer Connelly are mere shadows of their early-90's hotness now.

  • March 26, 2011, 12:36 a.m. CST

    braindrain ... OMG

    by Bob

    So did I! I went to the midnight show expecting a cool comic book movie. Snoozefest!

  • March 26, 2011, 12:55 a.m. CST

    Jon Hamm as the new Dick Tracy

    by Tommy999

    Make it happen

  • March 26, 2011, 12:59 a.m. CST

    Remember that movie when Where Jennifier Connely was locked in a Target

    by Phategod100

    She had biggest tits ever in that picture.

  • March 26, 2011, 12:59 a.m. CST

    I meant Jennifer Connelly

    by Phategod100

  • March 26, 2011, 1 a.m. CST

    When is it not a "cynical time"?

    by DoctorWho?

  • March 26, 2011, 1:08 a.m. CST

    When is it not a cynical time?

    by Dr. Egon Spengler

    From the time you're born until the age of 12-13. After that, it's all downhill.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:09 a.m. CST

    DICK TRACY looks like how THE SPIRIT should have

    by MooseMalloy

    Unlike most I do enjoy parts of Miller's THE SPIRIT. Also, I own the "Making of DICK TRACY" book which any fan should try to get a copy of.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:09 a.m. CST

    until madonna fucked a-rod..

    by sonnyhooper

    .....she was super hot. i mean, close to michelle pfeiffer levels of hotness..... but she fucked it all up by fucking that pin-striped piece of shit.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:34 a.m. CST

    Dick Tracy is actually a wonderful film

    by JoeSixPack

    It's not perfect, but really a beautiful film. I hope Beatty makes another Dick Tracy.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:43 a.m. CST

    Worst movie ever

    by SmokingRobot

    Jesus, are you kidding? The casting was awful, the acting was awful, the art direction was awful. Even Danny Elfman's score seemed out of place. This was a disaster of a movie. Except for Tess Truehart..she was very good. Other than's a crap sandwich with not much bread.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:57 a.m. CST

    What no one's mentioned...

    by film11

    C'mon....Pacino ruled that movie! It's been running on HDNet Movies and I caught it a couple weeks ago. Looks great in HD (although some Beatty close-ups were soft, as he was using filters to hide the aging back then). And it was the first time that Pacino & Caan shared the screen since GODFATHER. The movie is filled with small touches like that.

  • March 26, 2011, 2 a.m. CST

    People liked that movie?

    by redkamel

    even as a kid I thought it was ok...forgettable, but entertaining. The movie sucked, the plot was nonsensical, the bad guys were goofy, I hated the kid, and Dick Tracy wears a fucking yellow suede trench coat. I am pretty sure its supposed to be a regular old tan trenchcoat and hat that was just yellow when printed. The Shadow blows it out of the water, and so does the Phantom I am sad to say. Dick Tracy is due for a proper treatment. They should do it Sin City style.

  • March 26, 2011, 2:12 a.m. CST


    by Aquanaut

    actually, you've got to be the one that's kidding..the casting was great, the acting was appropriately theatrical with great punchy dialogue, the art direction was perfect, and i don't think there could have been a more fitting composer then danny elfman for the project.

  • March 26, 2011, 2:12 a.m. CST


    by JaredP

    you're crazy DICK TRACY was a great film. if you didn't like it the fault is with you not the film

  • March 26, 2011, 2:18 a.m. CST

    it was fun to look at...thats it

    by john

    there wasnt enough scenery for the actors to chew on madonna shouldnt have been in it...and neither should beatty

  • March 26, 2011, 3:24 a.m. CST


    by reaper28

    Holy. Fucking. Shit. YES!!

  • March 26, 2011, 4:51 a.m. CST

    I fucking hate Madonna

    by disfigurehead

    but i liked the rest of the movie.

  • March 26, 2011, 4:51 a.m. CST


    by tylerzero

  • March 26, 2011, 5:03 a.m. CST

    Give the role to Jon Hamm

    by davidwebb

    or is that too obvious?

  • March 26, 2011, 6:15 a.m. CST

    Calling Gabriel Macht...

    by UltimaRex

    Calling Gabriel Macht... It's time to atone your your sins Gabriel Macht...

  • March 26, 2011, 6:37 a.m. CST

    Nathan Fillion for Dick Tracy

    by elsewhere


  • March 26, 2011, 6:45 a.m. CST

    Tracy Lords retains the right to beat Warren's dick

    by Bobo_Vision

  • March 26, 2011, 7:33 a.m. CST

    I want magnetic air cars

    by Manos

    And moon maid

  • March 26, 2011, 7:41 a.m. CST

    tired of cynical?


    something tells me you didn't catch 'inside job'. now i know thats a doc but goddam if it didn't prep me for some cynical times.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:43 a.m. CST

    So why did Beatty retain the rights?

    by Nerd Rage

    For the money or creative control? I can't imagine that Dick Tracy is still making much money.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:46 a.m. CST

    The movie is fun in small doses.

    by Nerd Rage

    but as a whole it just wears down on you with it's exaggerated style and tone.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:47 a.m. CST

    oh and I hated the Kid.

    by Nerd Rage

    Wanted to punch him in the face the entire movie.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:04 a.m. CST

    I say he's too old. Let him play an old and gritty dick

    by Bobo_Vision

    A penis.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:12 a.m. CST

    Good call on Jon Hamm, davidwebb

    by BenBraddock

    Sometimes obvious is good! Found DICK TRACY very stuffy, no sense of fun or excitement, though I loved the gallery of villains character makeup. Madonna sucked, she can't act, someone should tell her. She may have been hot back then but her acting was so wooden it took all of the hotness out of her. And now she looks like 85% made of wax

  • March 26, 2011, 8:16 a.m. CST


    by Rommel Catuncan

    The movie relies to much on montages with musical numbers- the actual plot is not very compelling. It looks great though, I like the feel of the era. The gangsters were a bit overdone with their makeup. If it were done again, it would probably be made to be more realistic. Definitely would need a more serious plot.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:18 a.m. CST

    Jon Hamm is obvious

    by Rommel Catuncan

    but a great choice.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:20 a.m. CST


    by Rommel Catuncan

    I kind of like that it looks like a studio backlot though. Like when there is the drive by shooting and the Kid warns Tracy and he runs down the street. It has a great feel to it.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:22 a.m. CST

    Beatty is like one of those guys on "American Pickers"

    by Chewtoy

    ...where they visit some old guy with a barn full of stuff that he has collected and has been rusting, untouched, unseen and forgotten for 40 or so years, and yet when somebody comes by who actually wants the item, the old kook can't part with it for any price. I doubt this is a victory for anyone who cares about the property or would like to see it revived. Beatty will toss it in a drawer again, keeping it safe from everyone who might like to take a shot at using it. The publisher will complete their decent into bankruptcy, Beatty will remain in his mansion not making films and the property will rust away another 20 years.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:25 a.m. CST


    by Rommel Catuncan

    well that sucks.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:45 a.m. CST

    I'm Dick Tracy! Take that Pruneface!


    Now I'm Pruneface! Take that Dick Tracy! Now I'm Prune Tracy! Take that Dick-

  • March 26, 2011, 8:57 a.m. CST

    phategod100: Career Opportunities


    You bastard. Learn it. Live it. Love it. CHOPPED

  • March 26, 2011, 9:03 a.m. CST

    Other problems

    by bah

    - Beatty didn't look the part. He didn't need a prosthetic face like everyone else in the movie, but someone with a natural square jaw was needed - Completely wasted several dozen interesting villains. It was like a Batman movie opening with the Penguin killing Two-Face, Scarecrow, Mr Freeze, and Killer Croc, then every other Batman villain getting killed in a single shootout at the end.

  • March 26, 2011, 9:13 a.m. CST

    Beautiful to LOOK at, I dreamed of James Cameron directing.

    by JDanielP

    If that flick had the action and choreography to match (like RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK), it could have been spectacular!

  • March 26, 2011, 9:50 a.m. CST

    Dick Tracy was one of Madonna's best

    by whoofman

    One of her better acting roles. And her singing was just fine in that. One of her songs even won an Oscar for song writer Stephen Sondheim that year. Her performance at the Oscars of the song was a bit over the top but fun.

  • March 26, 2011, 9:51 a.m. CST

    Damnit, Kevin Costner beat me to the Simpsons joke

    by D.Vader

    Littld Ned, no!!!

  • March 26, 2011, 10:04 a.m. CST

    Madonna wasn't the problem - it was that fucking irritating KID.

    by Professor_Monster

    And, yeah, I know "the kid" is part of the comic, but shit, there were plenty of stories without him and those are the ones they should have chosen to do. When I remember Dick Tracy, I sometimes mix up scenes from Johnny Dangerously - which is wayyy awesome, but Dick Tracy is still a good fun film, it just needed more action and no kid.

  • "You shouldn't hang me on a hook Johnny... My mother hung me on a hook once. ONCE."

  • March 26, 2011, 10:26 a.m. CST

    MADONNA?? i thouht she was fantastic...

    by cmaslow309

  • March 26, 2011, 10:27 a.m. CST

    I'm having a thought....

    by LargoJr

    .. Madonna can't carry a tune in a bucket. Listen to her try to sing Evita. It was her ONLY attempt at singing without backup or pitch correction, and it's horrifying. As for 'hotness'.. geebus cheerios, I've seen sexier in a Wal-Mart clothing ad.. gimme a break. As for DANCE?? LOL.. You should hear some of the stories choreographers tell how she demanded elaborate routines and moves, then had to simplify them when she wasn't willing to practice or prepare for them & ended up looking like a wounded stork on initial prep!

  • March 26, 2011, 10:31 a.m. CST

    MADONNA?? i thought she was fantastic

    by cmaslow309

    i thought she NAILED the role,,ok,,eveyone shoot me,,,i think shes kinda underated,,,i think of her in Dick tracy,,,then desperatley seeking susa,a league of their own and Evita,,,its hard to beleive its all the same woman,,where as someone as jennifer anniston,,even julia roberts,,,they all seem to be the "same" kinda role in most all their movies....THERE i said it! ;) let the crucifying began!! o;)

  • March 26, 2011, 10:32 a.m. CST

    Why can't we believe in Batman, or Spider-Man?

    by moorE12

  • March 26, 2011, 10:35 a.m. CST

    This film would look amazing on bluray.

    by grendel69

    I remember Siskel & Ebert were so impressed with the film they dedicated a whole show to it. Its a great under appreciated comic book film, and I never understood why the film wasnt given the royal treatment on DVD. THIS is the type of film special editions were made for. Behind the scenes makeup stuff and so on. Anyway this film needs to be remastered and released on Bluray.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:38 a.m. CST

    Patrick Warburton...

    by Jamie

    He's got the look and would pull off the camp cheese required for the role of Dick Tracy.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:45 a.m. CST

    The Film's Biggest Flaw

    by ZooTrain

    Was killing off the strip's most notable villains in the first few minutes of the movie. I understand the point, but all of those interesting characters were never given a chance to shine.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:57 a.m. CST


    by Rommel Catuncan

    I would like to see those villains explored more, the whole gangster aspect, instead of just Big Boy Caprice/Pacino yelling a lot. The movie did focus a lot on the Kid as well as Madonna and less on the underworld, which was kind of glossed over.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:05 a.m. CST


    by Rommel Catuncan

    It's the legal troubles that have never gotten the movie a proper special edition release or blu-ray.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:07 a.m. CST


    by film11

    Make sure you catch Warburton in ROCK SLYDE. It's as close to TRACY as he'll probably get.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:09 a.m. CST


    by film11

    I actually found this movie more entertaining than TRACY. It doesn't have the terrific production design that TRACY had, but it seemed more in keeping with the tone of the comic strip...villain included.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:30 a.m. CST


    by redkamel

    hmmm I dont think so. Its not one of those movies that is so bad that I think no one should ever watch it. But it could have been a really cool cops and robbers film and instead we got something looked like Batman and Robin circa 1950, with a nonsensical plot, no real villians, no main actors under 50 (except for the Kid and Madonna) and no action.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:34 a.m. CST


    by film11

    Which makes up for all the movies that have no main actors OVER 50!

  • March 26, 2011, 11:39 a.m. CST

    Madonna is STILL hot. Fact. (nt)

    by Triple_J_72

  • March 26, 2011, 11:45 a.m. CST

    Beatty is a dick

    by Uncle Stan

  • March 26, 2011, 11:45 a.m. CST

    not really sure what the point of this story is...

    by emeraldboy

    i saw dick tracy and thought it looked incredible. but the studio system that allowed beatty to vent his creative ego is not there anymore. if warren wants to make another dick tracy movie, then its in his head and aint going to happen. whats the point of this article.

  • FACT!

  • March 26, 2011, 12:14 p.m. CST

    Yeah well you can't get rid of the time and batt info at the top

    by UltraTron

    of the screen on iPad while using Kobo. You should be able to get rid of that useless info whenever you want. Somebody tell apple!

  • March 26, 2011, 12:35 p.m. CST

    it just wasn't good

    by happyboy

    the point isn't art direction. the movie just wasn't good. casting was terrible starting with Dick. the entire movie wasn't "this is Dick Tracy comic strip on screen" it was "oh look here's Madonna, oh here there's Hoffman, oh here is Beatty, wow he looks way too old to be in this movie" I'm glad we're covering shit from 30 years ago that have nothing to do with anything. well played AICN

  • March 26, 2011, 12:43 p.m. CST

    Nordling, you know DAMNED well....

    by Playkins

    ...that if this movie came out today, it would be thrashed JUST as hard as it was when it came out.<P> Rose-colored glasses, buddy.

  • March 26, 2011, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Brian M. Bendis vs Beatty

    by John Payne

    Per Bendis' tweet he was trying to get permission to do a comic or graphic novel or something but Beatty wasn't letting him so I assume that means Beatty has more than just film rights to the character?

  • March 26, 2011, 1:01 p.m. CST

    Prick move by Beatty.

    by -Halfscan-

    This isn't some sort of geek victory, this was pure douchebaggery in action.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:05 p.m. CST


    by Miguel De Barioz

    This film is great my brother brig it home form America last year - we all love his kooky face and hat. Can not believe this man is 70 year old - He fuck that blondie all the time like a dog with one cock and another jus below it. Thought the film looked shitty though all the colours were red an blue an green - my mamas eyes were stinging her so much. Would love to see more of this kooky cunt with his wrinkly neck.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:05 p.m. CST

    the magic of the wrist communicator is gone


    there should be a scene where dick tracy is fiddling with his trying to get reception, while some tween nearby is having facetime on their iphone and accessing like 10 kinds of info from the internet. though when they make an iPhone or iPad you can wear on your wrist, i'm getting one.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:18 p.m. CST

    Well Madonna's kissed about a bazillion people...

    by Triple_J_72

    ...she's bound to get something along the way.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:20 p.m. CST

    by Amanda Kennedy

    YES!!!! i know the remakes are pretty much owning the cinemas along with films based on comic books and graphic novels (which i love) but i could totally go for a remake of this one!! bring it on!!!

  • March 26, 2011, 1:31 p.m. CST

    Hamm does kind of look like Gould's version

    by Terrence

    Only not as square jawed, but that's to be expected. He could capture that earnest, yet "I'll punch the fuck out of you if I don't have a tommy gun" vibe.

  • March 26, 2011, 1:41 p.m. CST

    Jon Hamm as Dick Tracy would be great

    by lv_426

    It would make up for the fact that he is too old to play Superman, but for Dick Tracy he would be perfect. Keep the colorful comic book style of Beatty's film but with more action. That could be fun, and as Nordling suggested, another Dick Tracy film would be a good companion film to Captain America.

  • March 26, 2011, 2:28 p.m. CST

    This just in....Michael Bay retains rights to ANDY CAPP 3D

    by Wilford_Brimleys_Diabetes_Rage

    Starring Martin Andy..Capp

  • March 26, 2011, 3:02 p.m. CST

    Nathan Fillion should play Dick Tracy

    by ScuubyDuu

    He'd be perfect for the part.

  • March 26, 2011, 3:08 p.m. CST

    execellent movie!!!

    by crazybubba

    tracy was not really a comic book character but one of the few movies in that genre done well.

  • March 26, 2011, 3:11 p.m. CST

    they need someone with Beatty's manic intensity

    by crazybubba

    Hamm has the look but he's a little too mellow for this movie.

  • March 26, 2011, 3:32 p.m. CST

    crazybubba fool

    by Miguel De Barioz

    You are a fool crazybubba - Dick Traceys was a great comic. I read it in paper every week - so you do not know what you speak of. And what is Hamm are you jew?! Ha Ha Ha. Ha.

  • March 26, 2011, 4:06 p.m. CST

    Madonna taints everything she touches

    by kafka07

    hell, the woman can't even adopt a child right.

  • March 26, 2011, 4:49 p.m. CST

    Huh? How is this GOOD news?

    by Dursman2000

    Hurray, let's have Warren Beatty keep the rights with no intention of doing anything with them? He's never making another DICK TRACY movie. The only thing he did was make some lame-ass TCM special years ago so he could retain them for whatever reason. Probably he kept them so his family can make a fortune off selling them to the highest bidder when he's dead. Sorry to be cynical but this isn't good news -- if anyone actually wants another DICK TRACY the only way that would happen is if Tribune got them back. Now, that's as dead as Beatty's career.

  • March 26, 2011, 5:18 p.m. CST

    Too many montages

    by Drath

    The pacing of the movie just draaaaaaaaagggggggged and was not helped by all the montages cut to Madonna's singing. It felt like very boring music videos intruding in the middle of the movie. Also, who cared about the ownership of the Club Ritz? There just wasn't a lot of gravitas in that script. If this director's cut is so great, maybe that'd be something to see. But I have trouble saying the movie has aged well. For me all of its value is the nostalgia along with the '89 Batman. That was a fine time to be a kid loving movies. Too bad the 90s in general did not deliver anymore classics in that vein except maybe the Rocketeer (as a cult fav obviously since it tanked).

  • March 26, 2011, 6:24 p.m. CST

    My grandfather worked on the strip with Gould

    by Mooseboy

    I'm surprised the Tribune did more than rent the rights to Beatty. I thought the original was well done, and it correctly didn't try to be 100% like the comic. It had to evoke the idea of a comic world. Wished they could have done something with B.O. Plenty, tho. :-)

  • March 26, 2011, 6:26 p.m. CST

    TRUE STORY - a fire killed the sequel

    by Arcadian Del Sol

    remember that huge backlot fire that destroyed so many memorable sets way long ago? it completely destroyed all the Tick Tracey sets and nearly all the vehicles used in the film. They simply couldn't afford a sequel after that.

  • March 26, 2011, 6:37 p.m. CST

    kafka07: Madonna touches everything with her taint

    by LargoJr

    There ya go.. fixed the syntax error in there for ya buddy.

  • March 26, 2011, 6:48 p.m. CST

    rkdn: Studio Fire? You're high... why? 1 word.. INSURANCE

    by LargoJr

    The problem with a sequel was no-one could agree to how the movie would move on. Beatty wanted further character development as Tracy decides to retire after 1 last case, studio wanted a tighter story with less distraction and more action. Neither would budge.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:29 p.m. CST

    Maybe they can "re-imagine" it as Philip K. Dick Tracy?

    by lv_426

    It would be a sort of Blade Runner pastiche crossed with a futuristic Dick Tracy reboot concept that would also somehow work in a Philip K. Dick biopic subplot.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:35 p.m. CST

    My Dad's Member's Only jacket has aged better than Dick Tracy.

    by Flip63Hole

    Only good thing about it was the makeup and Danny Elfman's score.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:46 p.m. CST

    Hey, I was never happy with the theatrical cut...

    by Sicuv Uyall

    why would I give a shit about a director's cut. That movie blew and left my memory after leaving the theater. I was hoping for a real movie and not some comic-strip noir bullshit.

  • March 26, 2011, 7:53 p.m. CST

    other movies Viggo likes...

    by Sicuv Uyall

    Sheena, Queen of the Jungle. Tank Girl. The original Batman with Adam West. Johnny Mnemonic. The 90's Fantastic Four. The new Fantastic Fours. The 90's Captain America. The Spirit (so much better than that self-serious Sin City.. good job, Frank) The Shadow (Baldwin's best performance to date), The Phantom. Superman 3 and 4.. and the superior scores. Half of Spider-Man 3. And he wants the TV show The Mask to come back, please.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:34 p.m. CST

    Grown in estimation?

    by Subtitles_Off

    DICK TRACY? Anybody who'd think that would probably fall for, Jebus, I dunno, something as bad as SUCKER PUNCH. Nordling's credibility hangs by a slender, fraying thread. Only his ability to see Madonna as the unwatchable, horrifying, ugly mess she's always been/will ever be keeps him dangling. I like the kid. Anybody willing to type complete nonsense like "DICK TRACY has grown in estimation over the years" and sell it with conviction is okey-dokey. Even if they're full of it.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:35 p.m. CST

    Madonna has no talent. And she's ugly. Two facts.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Wanna third? She smells weird.

  • March 26, 2011, 8:36 p.m. CST

    Madonna was HAWT in DICK TRACY.

    by Bob Loblaw Law Blog

    I think you might be in the minority here on this one, Nordling. I was 10 years old when I saw this in the theater, and I had a total prepubescent crush for Breathless. Plus, her duet with Mandy Patinkin "What Can You Lose" is amazing. Such a great song.

  • Why would anyone trust their opinion on what's hot? I don't even trust A-Rod in baseball.

  • But he's wrong about this one. Madonna hasn't been anything but a fringe "star" since girls who were twelve in 1984 turned thirteen. Oh, sure. They'll keep writing about her in Entertainment Weekly. Like I said, the gays love her. Nobody even calls GaGa the "new" Madonna. That's how irrelevant she is. She's the old GaGa.

  • March 26, 2011, 9:37 p.m. CST

    Viggeo, I would love to expose The Choppahs, and end it, but

    by Subtitles_Off

    I only know five of them, for certain, three of whom say they no longer use The_Choppah as a handle. Even they got sick of it. They learned, you can't pretend you stand against "the trolls" when you become one. If I knew them all, I'd blow the whistle on them all, and they know it. But, I don't think it's fair to go after just a few of them while the most obnoxious might skate away. They're not all cunts. Their idea is a cunty one, but some actually thought (think) they were being clever and funny. You'll notice, every once in awhile, some of them are. Kinda clever. Also, they all still self-identify with a group I once counted myself a part of and had great regard for. I don't want further damage done by association. Sorry. I'm not trying to be evasive.

  • March 26, 2011, 9:38 p.m. CST

    As for my dick. If I let it anywhere near Madonna, it would be because

    by Subtitles_Off

    it was already broken anyway, and I had no further use for it. That's not gonna happen for awhile.

  • March 26, 2011, 9:39 p.m. CST

    Madonna's Songs Were Fucking Painful

    by BigTuna

    Horrible soundtrack.

  • March 26, 2011, 9:48 p.m. CST


    by Subtitles_Off

    None of the names you mention can be confirmed. I'll find out, because, Jebus, if they let Mr. Nice Gaius in my former club, I'm not even going to let sentimentality stand in my way. That guy's a fuckstick.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:11 p.m. CST

    Will Joe Jitsu and Go-Go Gomez return

    by Chief Joseph

    I don't see why this hack's victory over the legitimate rights-holders is a good thing. This guy and Ryan O'Neal stopped being relevant before I was born and I just don't get their appeal.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:30 p.m. CST

    I have had other handles. Never two at the same time, though.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Immediately prior to Subtitles_off, I was Bjornegar (a name that was chosen for me --- I don't even know what it means), for which I was banned when I pissed off Kevin Smith. I was moviemack, who was ahead of the curve on exposing BATMAN BEGINS. I think "he" was finally banned for making a gay joke about Bryan Singer. Who hasn't? Before that I had a handle, too, but I can't even remember it. And perhaps one before that. I actually tried very hard to be less nasty as Subtitles, until I just gave up giving a fuck. Oddly, I now have three "trolls," and when I was at my worst in the past, I could only get Gaius to muster up enough animosity. I've been around, more or less, since '04-ish.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:32 p.m. CST


    by MediaGold

    Too late. Enjoy your grandpa character and shitty movie.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:34 p.m. CST

    Whatever happened to danny_glover's_dickblood?

    by lv_426

    Did the Predator get him?

  • March 26, 2011, 10:38 p.m. CST

    Warren Beatty's daughter is living as a man.

    by BigTuna

    She's planning a sex change. True story. Poor old guy. Has another Chazz on his plate.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:38 p.m. CST

    Captain America: A hero you can believe in.

    by Subtitles_Off

    If you're seven. I really do like this Nordling newbie. He's got all of Harry's pixie-ish naïvete with much better grammar. (Of course that's damning his grammar with feint praise.) I hope he doesn't take my slagging off on his opinions personally.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:43 p.m. CST

    My theory, regarding my stalkers, involves

    by Subtitles_Off

    their penis size and the word "wee." They are usually so wrapped up in the blanket of their belief in Christopher Nolan as their personal savior, they just can't tolerate non-believers. They're like Tea Partiers and Obama. "Whaddaya mean we might actually benefit ferm hef care? We ain't Commie-nists!" Except Kobe. Kobe, insofar as the whole Choppah thing, which he accused us of, more or less, long ago, turned out to be sorta right. Credit where credit is begrudgingly due.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:49 p.m. CST

    Viggeo, this, on that...

    by Subtitles_Off

    I think there needs to be an active counter-weight to hype. It's literally the only thing left between us and sniffing dog's hind ends, culture-wise. I believe, however, I have a pretty good record at keeping it to the stuff, as opposed to slagging on somebody's mother, or something. It's only pop, people. Get over it. saying Madonna sucks is not the same thing as saying you suck for liking Madonna. When somebody goes off on me, I'll get just as childish as they wanna be, though. I can be as juvenile as the next dude living in the basement of his mom's house. But, I'm getting better, I thought. The whole cyber-bullying thing has taken a lot of the fun out of being a cunt on the internet.

  • March 26, 2011, 10:53 p.m. CST

    Dickblood has never been a Choppah.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Dickblood remains an inspiration to several Choppahs, though. I was never around the "legendary" Baleback, where Dickblood gained his fame. I don't share his reverence for The Welsh Mumbler. Dickblood hangs out (at least he used to) at his own parody/movie site Ain't It Bale News.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:02 p.m. CST

    braindrain, Whedon is due for a comeback.

    by Subtitles_Off

    If his AVENGERS thing comes off, it'll be worse than it ever was during the Buffy years. Malformed adult men are always worse than women. Always.

  • March 26, 2011, 11:11 p.m. CST

    Yep, that's it, Viggeo, except...

    by Subtitles_Off

    I'm not a blockbuster fan, at all. The last one I liked was the first IRON MAN, because I had such low expectations it couldn't help but be a pleasant surprise. People accuse me all the time of hanging out at the wrong place when I'm here. They're right. I like the classics. If you haven't seen Kurosawa and Fellini, your opinion on how awesome Nolan is means nothing. (And, if you've seen Kurosawa, Fellini, Ozu, plenty of Hitchcock, lots of Lean, plenty of Herzog, Ford, Huston, etc., and you still think Nolan is a bag of chips, there's gotta be something wrong with part of you.) So, I'm ALWAYS the nay-sayer. Doesn't mean I'm wrong. Just means I might get played out on a site like this where it's all, pretty much, more or less garbage.

  • March 27, 2011, 1:13 a.m. CST

    You have to love when...


    a man can first write... "It's only pop, people. Get over it. saying Madonna sucks is not the same thing as saying you suck for liking Madonna." Then turn around and write... "I like the classics. If you haven't seen Kurosawa and Fellini, your opinion on how awesome Nolan is means nothing. (And, if you've seen Kurosawa, Fellini, Ozu, plenty of Hitchcock, lots of Lean, plenty of Herzog, Ford, Huston, etc., and you still think Nolan is a bag of chips, there's gotta be something wrong with part of you.)" I'd say CHOPPED, but why bother.

  • March 27, 2011, 8:04 a.m. CST

    I Fucking Hate This Movie

    by Autodidact

    From the first time I saw an ad for it there was something I hated about this movie. As a kid I'd sit in front of the TV drawing for hours, watching pretty much any movie that came on that was worth half a shit. But whenever this movie came on, and that fucking "Kid" shit started up, I would get a sudden urge to go shoot some hoops.

  • March 27, 2011, 8:30 a.m. CST

    opinion has changed about this except for Madonna

    by GrndlWnderer

    I didn't much care for it when it came out, but over the years, I have come to appreciate it, not a great flick in any grouping, but not a train wreck either. But, one thing has not changed is that, once Madonna opens her mouth to speak, her character falls flat. Good God, she looks the part, and as other have pointed out, that black my, but as soon as she has to act, well, she was never known for her acting skills. I could stand for anther stab at this world, perhaps a little less bounds to the four color palete of the strip, but rather informed by it.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:27 a.m. CST

    Conspiracy theories

    by rogueleader66

    Nice to see they are alive and well in the minuscule brains that inhabit these TB's... You idiots crack me up, at least you give me a reason to come back here once in a while....your rants are entertaining, in the way that watching retards play in the park is amusing. Carry on!

  • March 27, 2011, 9:28 a.m. CST

    Cue Faulkner....

    by rogueleader66

    Telling me what a "loser" i am, cause all I do is "whine". Predictable, as morons always are.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:30 a.m. CST

    You have to love when...

    by Subtitles_Off

    A person can confuse "if you've seen Kurosawa, Fellini, Ozu, plenty of Hitchcock, lots of Lean, plenty of Herzog, Ford, Huston, etc., and you still think Nolan is a bag of chips, there's gotta be something wrong with part of you" with "you suck" and still come on fully-engorged as if he's the smartest most clever merfer around. Was that your idea of a "get," Choppie?

  • March 27, 2011, 11:34 a.m. CST

    WTH, are we know pretending this was a good movie???

    by HollywoodHellraiser

    Because we all know damn well it wasn't! It was nothing but talk, talk, talk, and very, very, very little action. Lets not pretend this was a good comic book movie! It was as "Happy Boy" stated, a film to introduce us to the stars playing comic-book characters! The costumes, direction, visuals, and acting wasn't inspiring! And Betty like some have stated, is going to keep this property hidden til he's likely passed!

  • You gonna call him out at the next club meeting? No? Oh, that's right this chopping thing of yours is relative. "Hey, guys, I know what will be fun! We'll create a 'troll' personality, and we'll go on AICN and engage other people we think are trolls, and then we'll whine about how bad 'trolls' are. See? It'll be funny when WE do it. We'll have to agree though, on who are 'trolls' and who aren't. We're qualified to do that, after all. Takes a bunch to know a bunch."

  • March 27, 2011, 11:42 a.m. CST

    Don't mind Subtitles, he's a little sore today. You see in reality...


    subtitles_off is the AICN "Yes, I am an actual ninja" Ninja. Despite the fact that "he sees things in the films that other people don't notice", his SHAOLIN review didn't go over so well. He's even crankier than usual.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:50 a.m. CST

    Chirp, Chirp, Chirp

    by Subtitles_Off

    Thanks for playing, Chirpah. When cornered, call me cranky. That works for you and, maybe, a third of your buddies. Nobody with any sense would care if I were cranky or not. Yeah, I guess that IS the same as saying you suck whether you like Madonna or not. My bad.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:52 a.m. CST

    Chirp, Chirp, Chirp.

    by Subtitles_Off

  • March 27, 2011, 12:06 p.m. CST

    Cornered? What are you talking about, Subninja?


    Your paranoid games are all solitary, only you know the rules. If you say I've been cornered in Subtitles Ninjaball, then it has to be true...right? It seems like an awfully serious game. So much at stake!

  • March 27, 2011, 12:14 p.m. CST

    Chirp, Chirp, Chirp.

    by Subtitles_Off

    The paranoid card, again? Thanks for playing. Run off to The Shelter and get permission to keep it up. Tell them it's their asses on the line. See if they all still got your hairy back. If you don't know which ones to ask, I'll give you their e-mail addresses.

  • March 27, 2011, 12:15 p.m. CST

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

    by Subtitles_Off

  • March 27, 2011, 12:17 p.m. CST

    I'll give you this...


    it takes great courage and insight to take a first year film school required viewing list and say THIS IS WHAT'S GOOD. THIS IS WHAT I LIKE! Maybe paraphrase a Roger Ebert review in your appreciation for good measure. It isn't easy going out on a limb like that, even for a movie ninja. I respect that kind of courage, shall we bury the hatchet?

  • March 27, 2011, 12:19 p.m. CST

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.



  • March 27, 2011, 12:44 p.m. CST

    Faulkner is back? I thought he said he was leaving for good?

    by D.Vader

  • March 27, 2011, 12:47 p.m. CST

    And how on earth did anyone discover someone's real name on here?

    by D.Vader

  • March 27, 2011, 12:48 p.m. CST

    I thought all this "Ryan" stuff was just a joke.

    by D.Vader

  • March 27, 2011, 12:49 p.m. CST


    by lynchmob17

    One of the main problems was they killed off some of the best villains too early. They killed the Brow, Pruneface, and Littleface right away. And they used one of the most obscure and uninteresting ones for the main bad guy(although Pacino gave it his all).

  • March 27, 2011, 12:55 p.m. CST


    by Dark Doom

    The whole movie was like vomiting on acid, oh look at the colors. Wow a techni-color yawn, meh, shitty acting, sub-par plot, the Shadow was better, the Rocketeer was better, etc, etc, Warren go back to fucking underage starlets (although I am jealous he got Carrie Fischer.)

  • No

  • March 27, 2011, 12:57 p.m. CST

    I like all the theories.


    I'm even starting to come around on subtitles_off. His movie opinions are predictable, but his talkback theories are a hoot. I particularly like all the dark implications of agendas and counter agendas, trolls and anti-trolls. The stakes are so high, it's all so important! I think it's good for talkback. As for me, I am, therefore I chop.

  • March 27, 2011, 12:59 p.m. CST

    Danny has his own website now

    by D.Vader

  • March 27, 2011, 1:10 p.m. CST

    Well that's just bizarre, AHole

    by D.Vader

    I missed whatever TB it was where the Ryan stuff started. I came in at the tail end of it, whatever the story was, and just assumed Viggeo found some videos of someone doing something stupid, something like Tourette's Guy, and then said "See, this is Braindrain!" Didn't realize there was actually some sort of truth behind the name. Its kinda scary. Reminds me of the debacle that went down between ContinentalOp and someone else... MJ's Corpse maybe?

  • March 27, 2011, 1:21 p.m. CST

    Ahole. I don't think, I know.

    by Subtitles_Off

    And they know I know. It really does sound hilarious and stupid. Just like one of those Nolan films some of them are so fond of. Vades, you gonna back me up, or are you still out of the loop, or are you still gonna say you're out of the loop?

  • March 27, 2011, 1:24 p.m. CST

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

    by Subtitles_Off

    I'm going to keep playing this thing to the absolute end, because I'm so clever. I'm Choppah! I swore I would never come back to this place, but now that I've got the attention I crave, I'm just gonna keep playing and playing. Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 1:25 p.m. CST

    That's the thing with genies and bottles.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Now they can all wash their hands and claim, "Oh, I was a Choppah, but I wasn't THAT Choppah." Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 1:39 p.m. CST

    "keep playing this thing to the absolute end"


    THE ABSOLUTE ominous! I love it. Is the absolute end the one where I travel back in time to terminate you before you're born, or where I travel back in time, make sweet love to you, and our love child saves the human race? ♪♫ chirp chirp chirp. I love this song, it has a beat and you can dance to it!

  • March 27, 2011, 1:48 p.m. CST

    Don't exagerrate, Choppie.

    by Subtitles_Off

    "Absolute end" is just a figure of speech, ill-used. But, it's fitting that you, with such a malformed, outsized ego, would immediately jump to delusions of grandeur.

  • March 27, 2011, 1:54 p.m. CST

    So, are we making sweet love...


    or not? I'll put on some romantic mood music ♪♫ chirp chirp chirp...

  • March 27, 2011, 1:55 p.m. CST

    Don't forget the soundtrack is excellent

    by Dolmes

    I'd check out another Dick Tracy, just hope they stick with prosthetics and don't go the cgi route or put it into 3Dull. 30% colour loss wouldn't benefit the yellow suit.

  • March 27, 2011, 2:29 p.m. CST

    by Cobra--Kai

    Oh man! I've just read this thread and I have to say, Subs is right... DICK TRACY is shit.

  • March 27, 2011, 2:31 p.m. CST

    by Cobra--Kai

    Viggeo, spilling a guy's real name on here and dancing around with verbal delight makes YOU look like the fool. You may have provided a picture of someone else but let me tell you I now picture you as some scrawny asswipe who hoots and hollers in the background to encourage a bully. And you used to be that Lowes_Girl? Yep. You were a wanker then and you're a wanker now. ps. You're not half the man Subs is. Don't delude yourself.

  • March 27, 2011, 2:33 p.m. CST



    I'm just trying to take it down a degree or two. It's well documented that paranoid people are capable of superhuman feats of nerd rage retard strength when agitated. Nobody needs that.

  • March 27, 2011, 2:46 p.m. CST


    by D.Vader

    I'm still out of the loop?

  • March 27, 2011, 2:58 p.m. CST

    You know.....

    by rogueleader66

    As much as i don't get along with Subs, at least he has some balls, where as lowes_forehead, viggo, whatever that dick calls himself now, is just a gutless turd. So Subs, it may be meaningless to you, but I do actually have a strange sort of respect for you. A moronic troll like lowes_forehead? Yea, just an asshole. He was then, still is now.

  • Yeah. That's the modus operandi. Rather than acknowledge you're busted and boring, or even just shut the fuck up and crawl away, you gotta convince yourself I'm the problem. Ahole, the answer to your query is "All of the Above." The Choppah is more than one person. They are part of a group that used to call itself The Pedalback. Then, some of them got the idea that they could belittle people by coming on and typing different, contradictory statements, trying to stir up shit. Some of them would come on and be funny and friendly. Some of them would come on and poke Asimov. Whatever. They were uninhibited by the anonymity of one handle and the fantasy that they were all funny and entertaining. Then, they mouthed off in an obituary thread and all got banned for awhile. Indirectly, as a result, they got D.Vader banned, too, and we all know what resulted from all of that. While banned, some of them came back on as Sons of Choppah and Latent Gay Partners of Choppah and that inspired others to join in and borrow the handle for awhile. But then they got called out. I told one of them they were bullshitting themselves, and I started getting e-mails from the rest. "Oh, we didn't know." "Oh, we're sorry." "Oh, please don't embarrass us." Some of them didn't get the memo. One of them, the drunkard, well, he never could learn to stop while he was ahead. It's part of his disease. He has no idea how he's painted everybody with his sloppy brush. Or maybe that's the other one. Now, they're down to, maybe, just two or three, and some of the rest of them pretend they were never involved in it. Completely unaware. Just so shocked at the whole thing. Like I said, they aren't all cunts. Most of them aren't. Truly. It's too bad you can't tell which ones those are anymore because they're all hiding behind their unleashed Id. Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 3:29 p.m. CST

    Dick Tracy,Hulk,Creepshow and others that look..

    by BillyBatson

    It was pretty amazing the way Beatty's DICK TRACY looked like a comic strip come to life. Ang Lee's HULK and George Romero's CREEPSHOW also managed to pull it off. In fact, I believe Romero was the first to really go for that particular look and pull it off. Here's a lesser known film that tried the same thing

  • March 27, 2011, 3:45 p.m. CST

    Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.


    Wait, did Subtitles just acknowledge that he's NerdRage? Because I was starting to think he's Mr. Beaks...he certainly sounds like Faulkner.

  • I always thought it got a raw deal. Mumbles was AWESOME

  • I kno its AICN and their are trolls crawling all over the place, but come on guys (if you're guys that is) give it a rest. I know i'm asking for it by feeding the trolls but it seems like choppah, subtitles, this ahole, this braindrain are in every single thread around here? Sometimes I think the trolls are ALL just one guy. It all kinda blends together no?

  • Nor, really, do I care, since I am no longer a Pedalbacker. Vades is not, to my knowledge, one of The Choppahs. He knows them all, though, even though he may honestly not know he knows them all. You may have me on the order of the bannings. I wasn't there. I was told Vades got banned as a result of defending the "humor" of Choppah-hood at the obit thread for Tarantino's friend and co-film-maker. That's hardly a pointed detail. All of the bannings came as a result of misplaced loyalty and petulance. The idea that one would come on and string along some unknowing Talkbacker, then another would come on to confuse that Talkbacker, then they'd all run off to a private location and laugh about how they "got" that Talkbacker is the issue of Choppah-hood. It's their intent to make certain Talkbackers look foolish. This makes them Champions of Something, as far as social networking on the internet goes. Then, they have the cajones to call other people "trolls." In fact, I'm not the only ex-Pedalbacker who tried to talk them out of their cyber-bullying nonsense. When they came up with their great plan, wiser heads among them told them they were being knobs. And, again, Ahole, realize, more than a few of The Choppahs aren't malicious. They really were just being funny. Problem is, there's that whole apple-barrel-rot thing that some of them thought was just a figment of the wiser heads' imaginations. Then, they started getting accused of being me, and I started getting accused of being them. Just can't let that go. Gotta disassociate as far as I can from any of that. rogueleader dislikes me? That's alright. At least I know, when I'm dealing with rogueleader that it's him. And, he can have faith that he's dealing with me. Neither of us has to wonder if we're being set up or say anything we don't mean at the moment. Tomorrow, he'll remember what he typed about me, and I will remember what I typed about him. If we step over a line, we'll know who to step to and apologize. That's how it should be. The opposite of Choppah. Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • You just know that guy had his faire share of young ladies in hollywood.

  • Who cares if hes one guy or three guys or a woman or whatever? Why bother writing so much about choppah unless you are A. crazy/paranoid B. actually choppah him/her/itself and this is ALL some elaborate joke on everyone? There comes a point where if youre that obsessed about trolls you become one yourself. Shit on that note I should heed my own wisdom and drop this. I thought it would be fun to talk Dick Tracy and superhero movies but you guys have to go and muck up these boards!

  • March 27, 2011, 4:07 p.m. CST

    And what the heck is a "Pedalbacker"? Are you just making workds up??

    by D Middling

  • about a twenty year-old flop. Nobody forced you to read any of the posts. Don't waste your wise words on anger, muddy. Sing out. Tell us something interesting about Warren Beatty and DICK TRACY.

  • Dick Tracy was damn fun movie, mainly because of the villains obviously. Al Pacino did a nice spin on his yelling growling persona he unfortunately ebraced after doing Depalma's Scarface. Ah well. As for your admonishment "dont waste your wise words on anger" yeah I can tell youre a smartass. It was a mistake to even talk to you. You sound bitter and I try to be nice and friendly when I talk to people I don't even know. Why cant the rest of you angry talkbackers do the same? I understand when some guys can be funny on here but some of you like that braindrain character and choppah and you apparently take it too far. Youre doing this for your own amusement no? I don't appreciate it.

  • Why do you think box office succes is the same as quality??? Didnt Citizen Kane bomb? The Searchers bombed too and thats an American classic

  • March 27, 2011, 4:26 p.m. CST

    You're absolutely correct, muddbutt.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Box Office has nothing to do with quality. But DICK TRACY was a flop. It very famously lost a ton of money. That's what a flop is. I'm sorry it bothers you. DICK TRACY is a nicely art directed movie. I don't think it ever really works, but I concede that some might. I can't stand it because Madonna stinks up the screen, and it tries to have it both ways by being serious-ish but exaggerating the sets and color, but that's only my opinion, and you're entitled to a different one. DICK TRACY is vastly superior to lots of things being made today, because, at least, it had a thoughtful mind behind it. Oh, and people used to call out Beatty on his affairs all the time. The difference between him and Polanski ought to be obvious: Beatty's women were adults, and he was never convicted of a crime.

  • Or is subtitles choppah because he seems hellbent on creating a backstory for his supervillain/superhero troll? Creative but tiresome I guess. Anyway again I'm sorry abou getting caught up in this crap. Heres hoping Beatty gets to make another dick Tracy!

  • March 27, 2011, 4:43 p.m. CST

    Ahole, your translation skills need re-configuring, a bit.

    by Subtitles_Off

    I wasn't telling muddbutt to fuck off. Look, he's right. This is a current thread about Warren Beatty and DICK TRACY. That's what people are expecting to read and discuss when they come in. I've hijacked more than my fair share of threads in the past, but I try to wait until they've cooled off first. All The Choppah shit resulted from people asking me direct questions. If you don't want to know, just ignore posts with my name on them. That's what the whole +Expand All thing is for. See? It's a better idea than you thought it was.

  • Someone ELSE probably does, and old Warren just wanted to make sure they'd have to come and pay him off first.

  • March 27, 2011, 4:49 p.m. CST

    Here's another post you'll want to ignore, muddbutt. It's for viggeo.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Are you the one who has been attacking Cobra_Kai and The Dojo? 'Cause, if it is, sorry, but you and I are gonna have to come to blows after all. Cobes is aces. Always has been. Always will be.

  • You have sone insights. Thanks for chatting. And if the choppah or any other jerk on here bother you just ignore them. not worth it man. Sorry about getting angry toward you.

  • March 27, 2011, 5 p.m. CST

    Anyone can call me "grumpy" all they want.

    by Subtitles_Off

    To think that bothered me, you'd have to be dense. Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 5:02 p.m. CST

    by Cobra--Kai

    "Heres hoping Beatty gets to make another dick Tracy!" mudbutt is hoping for MORE DICK? Sorry! Ahh dear.. you set 'em up like that and I can't help myself. ps. Subs, thank you!

  • March 27, 2011, 5:03 p.m. CST

    I'm a bit too pale for yellow, though.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Even a straight man has to know his color palette.

  • March 27, 2011, 5:05 p.m. CST

    Will it stream somewhere, diox. I'll watch it then jus out of solidarity.

    by Subtitles_Off

    I don't have cable.

  • March 27, 2011, 5:18 p.m. CST

    Ahole, you might have just given Snyder his next movie idea.

    by Subtitles_Off

    He's gonna need one after they kick him off Superman on Monday.

  • March 27, 2011, 5:23 p.m. CST

    "Wimpy Kid took my lunch money!"

    by Subtitles_Off

    "He's not allowed to do that to me! I'm visionary!"

  • March 27, 2011, 5:40 p.m. CST

    Ha ha ha Phallus Susan!

    by the_scream

  • March 27, 2011, 5:54 p.m. CST

    Cobes *is* aces

    by D.Vader

    Subby and I agree on that!

  • March 27, 2011, 6:03 p.m. CST

    All this sound and fury over DICK TRACY?

    by FlickaPoo

    This movie was unwatchable.

  • March 27, 2011, 7:09 p.m. CST

    John Hamm as Dick Tracy

    by planetran_fan

  • March 27, 2011, 7:31 p.m. CST

    Hugh Jackman for Dick Tracy, no Katy Perry please!

    by Andy Pandy

  • I'll take STARGATE for a whirl with you.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:16 p.m. CST

    This time...

    by HarryKnowlesNonExistentInceptionReview

    ...Beatty can play Pruneface!

  • March 27, 2011, 9:17 p.m. CST

    Really? You guys are still picking on Braindrain?

    by D.Vader

    Real classy. Real masculine, picking on a "real" person, not a celebrity, an internet nobody's real identity from an anonymous handle. Kudos to you guys, its admirable.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:19 p.m. CST

    We can end this right now. I ... am ... THE_CHOPPAH.

    by ColonelFatheart

    THE_CHOPPAH doesn't need miracles. He is the miracle. Now he's here. Are you ready for me? I'm here to tear down everything around you, and you know what I'm going to replace it with? Something new: CHOP. The World of CHOP. So take your vintage one-sheets and give them to the geeks. What difference does it matter what you own? You have video games and maquettes? It's going to rot, and that rot is going to eat away your heart. All of you! There will be a flood, and there will be a fire. Everything will be destroyed. But there will be a new ark riding on that fire, and I hold the keys and I open the door, and I decide who goes in and who doesn't. You're my brothers from AICN, and you're the first I invite on the ark. Don't wait. Don't waste your life. CHOP with me.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:20 p.m. CST

    After all, which one of you people haven't CHOPPED?

    by ColonelFatheart

    Whoever that is, come up here and throw these stones!

  • March 27, 2011, 9:34 p.m. CST

    Not you, Ahole

    by D.Vader

    Like I said, I wasn't there for whatever spat you guys had in the past, and I don't think I've seen any ill will from you towards him in this TB. But pple like Faulkner picking on Braindrain's real identity, its bullying. Its pathetic, and Faulkner is too arrogant to admit I'm right.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:36 p.m. CST

    William Faulkner

    by D.Vader

    Maybe you're blind, maybe your reading comprehension is poor, but I admitted in that talkback that I was perfectly jealous of her. Sorry to take the wind out of your sails so soon.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:37 p.m. CST

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

    by Subtitles_Off

  • March 27, 2011, 9:39 p.m. CST

    AICN really has become an awful place. What can we do to make it better?"

    by Subtitles_Off

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:39 p.m. CST


    by D.Vader

  • March 27, 2011, 9:40 p.m. CST

    "Who me? Not me? It's all of them."

    by Subtitles_Off

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:40 p.m. CST

    I'm happy to impress you, William Faulkner

    by D.Vader

    Of all people, its obvious I've been spicing things up to get your attention. Amazing that what others think affects you so much. Says a lot about your character.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:46 p.m. CST

    "It's all been in fun."

    by Subtitles_Off

    Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 9:52 p.m. CST

    Ouch. William Faulkner's insults hurt.

    by D.Vader

    Especially coming from a guy willing to debase himself enough to pick on someone else's real identity. Its funny, he's trying to insult me, get a rise out of me, but in the end... This is a guy who knows all about my history, didn't like that people missed me during my banning, has apparently been following me enough to know my past posts, and yet his strongest attack so far is "You're boring." Boring enough to garner a strong following and elicit many responses from this joker apparently. Again, that says a lot about your character, mate.

  • Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:05 p.m. CST

    Poor Faulkner. You really do have poor reading comprehension.

    by D.Vader

    ""Boring enough to garner a strong following and elicit many responses from this joker apparently." " You have to understand, that comment was directed at YOU, you who knows my past history so intimately, who felt the need to constantly post about ME, and yet feels I'm so "boring". You need to understand, you don't mean shit to me. You get a laugh from me, regarding the irony of your situation (being an expert on someone you don't like-me- and feel is undeserving of the attention). I guess I shouldn't be surprised that went right over your head.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:06 p.m. CST

    What is a choppah?

    by AssyMuffJizz

  • March 27, 2011, 10:10 p.m. CST


    by rogueleader66

    I have been around longer than before you decided to bring your sorry ass back here, so stop being so full of you pretentious dick. That is as much attention that I will give your trolling, sorry loser ass.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:15 p.m. CST


    by rogueleader66

    I meant to say "stop being so full of YOURSELF you pretentious dick" Excuse my mistake

  • March 27, 2011, 10:15 p.m. CST

    Its cool, Faulkner, ignore EVERY point I've made about you

    by D.Vader

    Chicken out, cower into a corner, back away, ignore it all. But its right there, plain as day, for everyone to see. Faulkner is obsessed with D.Vader, knows all about his history, is jealous of the attention he received, proclaims him as being "boring", yet continues to respond to him months after the banning. You can't let it go. Its also obvious now that you are perfectly fine with cyber-bullying and picking on someone's real identity, which everyone knows is low and scummy. Dirty pool. There's no defense against that. Oh, and you can't read either. In the end, all this makes you look laughably bad. And in the end, you'll ignore it all to toss out another light-weight insult and give me more attention. To which I say, AHTHANKYOU!

  • March 27, 2011, 10:16 p.m. CST

    This is all quite amusing

    by rogueleader66

    Keep it up fellas, the more you feed the trolls, the more fun they are.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:20 p.m. CST

    as an interested outsider

    by Charlie_Sheens_Coke_Numbed_Penis

    what is all this energy being released at THE CHOPPAH about? I've been lurking for a few months and he/she/it is one of the most consistently INCONSISTENT voices on this site. as for the charges against him that he picks on people like a troll, I challenge ANYONE to show me that. Choppah is nice to everyone. Does CHOPPAH stur up interesting conversation? hells yeah!!! why would ANYONE hate on that?

  • March 27, 2011, 10:25 p.m. CST

    and Faulkner/D.Vades

    by Charlie_Sheens_Coke_Numbed_Penis

    this "ban" i keep hearing about was well before i found AICN, so i have no dog in this fight, but really, you both come across as maladjusted attention whores. just saying. i understand this site just underwent a renovation and impressive upgrade. why can't you guys do the same?

  • March 27, 2011, 10:28 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    Let's just clear this bullshit up now. No one else shall make this claim. I am he. I AM CHOPPAH.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:29 p.m. CST

    Oh Billllllyyyyyyy

    by D.Vader

    The only thing more pathetic than your insults are your responses. Talk about boring, you've actually caused me to not care one bit about your replies. The truth is, you DO care about me, probably MUCH more than what is needed to validate my existence. Because the facts are, after I was banned you A) talked about me, B) responded to those who continued to talk about me, C) know all about my history, D) continue to engage me. And what's especially interesting is what you DO know about me... ... That apparently after I was banned I "whined and whined", which is not something a talkbacker would know, as I was banned and unable to post. Or that I "whined for 3 months to get" my dot back. This speaks volumes about either A) an AICN editor/moderator, or B) someone who has an unhealthy obsession with me. So which is it? Because neither says very good things about you. And why engage you in the first place? I dunno, I guess I find it comical that someone would proclaim that he was quitting AICN and wouldn't be posting here ever again, and yet returns and knows what everyone has continued to post since he left. I guess you have a hard time sticking with your goals. *Yawn* Thanks for the chat, Faulkner. You've bored me quite a bit; I've lost interest in this "debate" (if one could call this one-sided discussion such). You've exposed your weaknesses, I've exploited them. Its over. You're done. Now go back to picking on people's real names to make yourself feel better about your lowly station in life. See you in the funny papers. I'm off to bed.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:31 p.m. CST

    Fine, Charlie Sheen

    by D.Vader

    Fuck off, you attention-starved Warlock wannabe. Is that a good reinvention? Or should I be nicer? Not sure which angle I should take =).

  • March 27, 2011, 10:37 p.m. CST

    p.s. I'm also William Faulkner AND d.vader

    by AssyMuffJizz

    All of you have been CHOPPED

  • This Vader guy seems reasonable except that he cant seem to shake off this faulker troll guy and Charlie Sheen is, uh, winning, but subtitles just when I thought you were cool you start this chirp chipr shit. Why man why?

  • March 27, 2011, 10:39 p.m. CST

    No, I am THE CHOPPAH...

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    and, in real life I am Dan Sinker, a journalism professor at Chicago's Columbia College and the former editor of a zine called Punk Planet. You might know me better as the 'fucking' genius behind fake twitter MayorEmanuel . I got a SWEET book deal for that, and there is NO LIMIT to what THE CHOPPAH brand will ultimately be worth. Thanks for playing....

  • March 27, 2011, 10:40 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    I need one for the little boy who lives in my mouth.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:41 p.m. CST

    Are you a priest assymuffjiz?

    by D Middling

  • March 27, 2011, 10:42 p.m. CST

    Wow faulkner is tiresome.

    by D Middling

    Trolls should at least be entertaining. Well the good ones anyway. You sir are not a good one.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:43 p.m. CST

    my attorney will be calling you in the morning, cheese dick

    by AssyMuffJizz


  • March 27, 2011, 10:48 p.m. CST

    Is everyone sayint theyre choppah? Or is everyone just the same guy?

    by D Middling

    Cuz I want to get in on thsi choppah business? Can I be a choppay too? Should I just declare it? So much for talking about Dick Tracy lol. I violated my own rules/standards! Such is the talkback huh?

  • March 27, 2011, 10:50 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    You didn't happen to grow up as an altar boy in the Newark area, did you? Because I've never lived there nor have known any altar boys in that area.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:51 p.m. CST

    Newark Delaware? I did live in Delaware for a time?

    by D Middling

  • March 27, 2011, 10:52 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    and I am he.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:53 p.m. CST

    NO! I AM CHOPPAH!!!!!!

    by D Middling

    Sorry I wanted to get in ont his fun. I think you missed by joke by the way before, assymuff jizz. I asked you if you were a priest since you had a little boy living in your mouth.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:57 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    Never been there. As God is my witness.

  • March 27, 2011, 10:58 p.m. CST

    I guess we ar all trolls on the internet, ahole.

    by D Middling

    Really when you think about it. Youre good people too I reckon, troll or not. Come one let's say it in one voice I AM the CHOPPA!!!

  • March 27, 2011, 11 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    I'm afraid you have me confused with some other priest. Happens all the time. Now say three hail Marys and get back on your knees. CHOPPED

  • March 27, 2011, 11:02 p.m. CST

    I know I'm new around here

    by kermit_the_fraud

    but I wanna be the_choppah too! Why not? He gets more ink than any topic I've read around here.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:16 p.m. CST

    no, i am THE CHOPPAH

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    this is the new escape persona i have recently begun to filter into regular background noise. Unfortunately, i let my government down. i didn't find THAT many cyber-terrorists.....this time. sad pitiful trolls, YES. True threats? non-existent.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:21 p.m. CST

    So many choppahs lol

    by D Middling

  • March 27, 2011, 11:23 p.m. CST

    There are government agencies that will help...

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    people who cannot afford their mood altering prescription drugs. they are nice people. Pride is your own worst enemy.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:29 p.m. CST

    I'll take pride.

    by Subtitles_Off

    You gonna go with alcoholism? Which of The Choppahs is gonna give you a ride home?

  • March 27, 2011, 11:32 p.m. CST

    I am NOT Choppah.

    by Subtitles_Off

    But, at least, I forced a few of the cowardly dummies to finally step out of the shadows. Aren't they a handsome and impressive lot? A round of applause, please, for all of the nitwits who didn't want to have anything more to do with AICN so many months ago. They've been here all along.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:34 p.m. CST

    The one who claims not to be Choppah IS Choppah

    by AssyMuffJizz


  • March 27, 2011, 11:39 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    Face it. There's a little Choppah in you too.

  • March 27, 2011, 11:44 p.m. CST

    I believe it was Descartes who originally stated:

    by kermit_the_fraud

    "I think, therefore I CHOP." But as Peirce stated: "Do not block the way of inquiry." So....who or what is the_choppah? What are the goals/ends of said choppah? These are essential questions, and need must be answered. Or, you could just follow in the footsteps of Socrates and drink in the deliciousness of choppah, as many choose to do. What's the harm in a refreshing quaff?

  • March 27, 2011, 11:45 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz

    THE MASTERMIND BEHIND THE CHOPPAH. The insufferable shithead persona is a mere ruse. Ha! I am a puppetmaster!

  • March 27, 2011, 11:47 p.m. CST


    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    It'd be nice if you could AFFORD to drink. Found a job yet? Or is your little anger issue still standing in the way? Oh, also that you are off your meds for 2 years.... Wanna keep playing?

  • March 27, 2011, 11:51 p.m. CST


    by AssyMuffJizz


  • March 28, 2011, 12:02 a.m. CST

    Hope you are spending a LOT of time crafting your response, Subs....

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    Remember all your e-mails. Unlike other fucktards on this site, I would NEVER bring the real world, ie real names, addresses, etc into a public internet discussion, but the content of those e-mails were never deemed private. There's a lot of hate filled missives contained in said e-mails. Are you REALLY sure you want the wrong people to see them? Especially the people you talked shit about and called derogatory names and now still play nicey-nice to their face? ****** See kids, its easy to make up a back story about why people hate each other if the only reason you are telling the story is to generate an audience by shocking them with good story telling...

  • March 28, 2011, 12:12 a.m. CST

    Awwwwwwww shit....

    by kermit_the_fraud

    is this stuff about to get REAL? Somebody call MTV!! I think I need to pitch "The Real World: Ain't It Cool News Talkback" to them. This is the true story...true stooorrrrry....of GOD KNOWS how many people...placed in an internet movie site talkback see what happens when...the shit starts flinging....and said shit.....gets REAL.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:13 a.m. CST

    What the fuck is all this? I'm THE CHOPPAH and all of you know it...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...just look at his frequent and debonair use of ellipses. Just wait till my girl finds out, I'm getting laid within an inch of my life tonight!

  • March 28, 2011, 12:19 a.m. CST

    Flick....Long time no see...

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    This place smells funny...Did you ever get your pedal back? DD won't like riding a pedal-less bike.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:21 a.m. CST

    What if Harry is the_choppah?

    by kermit_the_fraud

    Is he that nefariously ingenious? To come up with the idea of a false talkback persona in order to generate site traffic via discussion and debate? Only the neck-beard knows.....

  • March 28, 2011, 12:26 a.m. CST


    by FlickaPoo

    I haven't been here much, but this DICK TRACY thread stinks to high heaven...I couldn't resist.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:33 a.m. CST

    Flick, it's funny but just the other day...

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    on another thread...(forget which one...) Choppah was talking about TRACING his DICK on a chick's forehead... I thought that shit was FUNNY...

  • March 28, 2011, 12:33 a.m. CST

    Are you threatening me, you drunk fuck?

    by Subtitles_Off

    Go right the fuck ahead. You've hung on to private e-mails for so long for some reason, right? You got the "please, I hope we can still be friends" one. That's the one you wrote to me. Go ahead. Show 'em all how big your balls are. I didn't say anything to you I haven't said to Stabby, 'moose, EssDub, Sixies, Colonel, Teddy or Flickapoo already. I'd fire off all your drunken ramblings to put all these "hate-filled missives" in some sort of context, but context isn't what you do anymore is it? Sorry. I'm no longer your enabler. Do whatever you think is in your best interests.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:42 a.m. CST

    You started this, friendo...

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    I hated the way that movie ended s much as I loathed THERE WILL BE BLOOD. I'm just trying to get you to wake the fuck used to be a fun funny guy. We all miss that guy and the newer recruits do not understand how you could have been a founding father. The one that got replaced by the "get off my lawn" guy. There is no harm/no foul in all that the pedalback does. Only those who fear change fear the pedalback.... ***** See kids... its easy to make up crazy shit....

  • March 28, 2011, 12:42 a.m. CST

    Oh, damn. I seem to have mis-placed the drunken ramblings.

    by Subtitles_Off

    I must have thrown them all away. Oh, whatever will I do? I'll be exposed with no defense. Oh, dear. I should be cowering.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:42 a.m. CST

    mr ahole ramirez:

    by kermit_the_fraud

    You can be whoever you wanna be on there my's all anonymous. Me....I'm gonna be the dude who wears his cowboy hat and boots to the fucking BEACH!'s been a looooong time since I've watched ANYTHING on MTV. They DO still do the Real World, right?

  • March 28, 2011, 12:44 a.m. CST

    "Oh, dear. I should be cowering."

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    Why not just get some sleep and wake up like you were 2 years ago....

  • Yep. I'm the delusional one, folks.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:46 a.m. CST

    I'm Cheeses. I'm A Choppah. I'm The Pedalback.

    by Subtitles_Off

    Kobe's laughing his ass off at you right about now. He wants to jump in here and type a big all-capped TOLD YOU SO, but I'mma gonna save him the trouble and do it for him.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:46 a.m. CST

    YourAhole and I are the same person...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...I feel pretty good about that.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:53 a.m. CST

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    I didn't hold onto e-mails....I found them as I was recently cleaning out/deleting my account. I was amazed. We all miss the old you that was... ****** See kids, that is how you build up one of those emotional connection thingies...

  • March 28, 2011, 12:53 a.m. CST

    "The person you were two years ago."

    by Subtitles_Off

    Isn't that precious? I'm the only one on here who has always used the same handle, all that time. I'm hiding right out in the open, being accused by Mr. I'm So Fucking Hilarious I Have To Pretend To Be Someone Else So No One Holds It Against Me. Shit is finished. Chirp. Chirp. Chirp.

  • March 28, 2011, 12:59 a.m. CST

    Wait, cheeses_of_nazareth isn't a real name?

    by FlickaPoo

  • March 28, 2011, 1:01 a.m. CST


    by FlickaPoo

    ...I mean, it has to be...right?

  • March 28, 2011, 1:04 a.m. CST

    I am absolutely GORGING MYSELF on the irony...

    by kermit_the_fraud

    of the fact that DICK TRACY was nowhere nearly as engaging and dramatic as this talkback. *nom-nom*....'s delicious!

  • March 28, 2011, 1:11 a.m. CST

    Lives are overrated....

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    Nobody ever gets out of one alive...

  • March 28, 2011, 1:13 a.m. CST

    Sorry, holeflicker...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...I never considered first or second billing. I just wanted to be involved in flicking holes. Gently of course, especially at first...

  • March 28, 2011, 1:15 a.m. CST

    Wait-wait-wait....braindrain (not trying to start nuthin)

    by kermit_the_fraud

    You're asking "You're still here?" and saying "Get a life"? The VERY ACT of which shows that you, yourself are in fact HERE. More of that deliciousness.....I might just get sated.

  • THE CHOPPAH. We're here to take a bow, dammit!

  • March 28, 2011, 1:28 a.m. CST

    Well, I am also responsible...

    by Cheeses_of_Nazareth

    for several crop circles in northern England. We use them to predict sporting game outcomes.

  • March 28, 2011, 1:43 a.m. CST

    Mr Ahole Poo Flicker it is, then...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...we're going to chop the shit out of it!

  • March 28, 2011, 1:52 a.m. CST



    activity equals energy, equals productivity, equals stop hating your country, equals asshole. Seriously, okay? calm down

  • March 28, 2011, 2:18 a.m. CST

    I used to have Mondays off


    Back in the early 80's...Sundays, too. In the Fall I could watch football and get wasted and sleep it all off on Monday. As you grow older and accept corporate responsibility, more and more, they want you to work on Monday analyse shit and plan the coming week. Every week is contest.

  • March 28, 2011, 3:15 a.m. CST

    "Thursday nights during the daytime"


    Brilliant! Still doesn't equal 40 hours unless you're working 13 hour shifts each time. Which makes me wonder, how do you find the time to post in every single talkback here multiple times, stalk C-list celebrities on twitter with inane questions, and eat snacks during those long hours on Thursday night during the daytime... and on weekends? I seem to remember you said you made millions of dollars every year from ebay sales or some shit. If that were true, I highly doubt you would bother having a job that makes you work Thursday nights during the day. So which is it?

  • March 28, 2011, 5:40 a.m. CST

    ARMAGEDDON does not exist in this dojo

    by Cobra--Kai

    "Lord, what chemical element was known as Brimstone in ancient times?" asked one of the disciples of the dojo. "Sulphur" replied Cobra--Kai, and then sniffed. What was that smell in the air? And lo, Cobra descended from his Dojo into the plains below and there he did find a scene of ruination. Smoke and ash. 'What happened here?' Cobra mused to himself. A flame war? No, this was something different. And then Cobra noticed a small figure, hiding below a charred tree stump. "Who are you?" Cobra commanded. "Please sir" said kermit_the_fraud "I am but a humble noob. Don't hurt me." "You will not be harmed little one" spake Cobra and lifted kermit to his feet. "Now tell me - what happened in this place?" "I.. I.. was just looking for a place to talk about Amy Adams as Lois Lane. I didn't know, when I stumbled here, I had lost my way. The things I saw..." kermit began to shake, so Cobra smacked him dutifully across the cheek. "Ahh, thank you Sir" said kermit as the sting brought him back to the present. "There was shouting... and outing.. and madness... and mentions of tweeting... a many-headed Hydra who made people laugh and cry.. and emails and step daddys... and a man called Faulkner..." At the mention of Faulkner, Cobra spat on the ground. His spittle sizzled on the baked mud. Then Cobra saw another survivor. He was filthy but alive. "Please sir" said deweymuddbutt23 "I also was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I only survived by smearing myself with mud, like in Predator." "Tell me then" said Cobra "What think you of the sequels?" "Uhhh... " said mudbutt "Predator 2 is fun, but the recent Predators was a missed opportunity." "That is good" said Cobra "you can be trusted. Now take this fellow noob to a place of safety. I suggest Harry's DVD Picks and peeks of the week. Don not return, AND DO NOT SPEAK OF WHAT YOU HAVE SEEN HERE." With those words mudbutt gathered up kermit and hurried away. Cobra looked around him. 'That which does not kill us make us stronger', he said to no one in particular. And then returned to his dojo.

  • March 28, 2011, 6:41 a.m. CST

    Epilogue does not exist in this dojo

    by Cobra--Kai

    "My Lord!" a messenger burst into the Dojo "I bring news. A story about Gary Oldman running his mouth off about Batman has just appeared!" The wisest of the monks turned to Cobra "A coincidence?" Cobra did not answer.

  • March 28, 2011, 9:18 a.m. CST

    Boy there's a lotta Dick in here.

    by D.Vader

  • March 28, 2011, 9:20 a.m. CST

    I have been dutifully smacked by the dojo

    by kermit_the_fraud

    and will carry the mark as a badge of honor. *cue resounding chorus*

  • March 28, 2011, 9:45 a.m. CST

    Oh right. I'm a CHOPPAH too!

    by D.Vader

    I think?

  • March 28, 2011, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Until I am needed again...

    by AssyMuffJizz

    I bid you all adieu.

  • BWAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! How much are they going for? Any buyers? This thread is a false dawn.

  • March 28, 2011, 11:16 a.m. CST

    Warren Beatty Sucked in that Movie

    by Jack Desmondi

    I agree he did a nice job directing it, and the photography and production design were fantastic--but Beatty himself was all wrong. Dull, charisma-free and too goddamn old. Only Beatty's ego made him think he could pull the character off. Actually, I disagree with the comment on Madonna. I think she did a fine job playing a sexy slut. Only damn film she was every in that I could actually stand her.


  • March 28, 2011, 2:07 p.m. CST

    overrated, LOL! I can almost forgive you for liking Sucker Punch


  • March 28, 2011, 11:22 p.m. CST

    Cobra, you magnificent madman...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...that was inspired. I wish we could have another tournament.

  • March 29, 2011, 12:16 p.m. CST



    "Mistah Subs -- he chopped." I We are the clever men We are the CHOPPED men Leaning together Headpiece filled with straw. Alas! Our dried voices, when We talkback together Are quiet and meaningless As wind in dry grass Or Kobe's feet over broken glass In our dry cellar CHOPs without form, shade without colour, Paralyzed force, gesture without CHOPPING; Those who have crossed With direct eyes, to Harry's other Kingdom Remember us—if at all—not as lost Silly souls, but only As the clever men The CHOPPED men. II Eyes I dare not meet in dreams In Harry's dream kingdom These do not appear: There, the eyes are Sunlight on a broken talkback There, is a noob swinging And voices are In the TB’s singing More distant and more solemn Than braindrain's star. Let me be no nearer In Harry's dream kingdom Let me also wear Such deliberate disguises Dickblood’s coat, Kobeskin, crossed Cobras In a field Behaving as the TB behaves No nearer— Not that final meeting In the talkback kingdom III This is the MJ Corpse land This is Kobe land Here the digital images Are raised, here they receive The supplication of a CHOPPED man’s hand Under the twinkle of a fading talkbacker. Is it like this In Harry's other kingdom Waking alone At the hour when we are Trembling with troll-i-ness Fingers that would CHOP Form prayers to broken servers. IV The eyes are not here There are no eyes here In this valley of dying talkbackers In this hollow valley This broken jaw of our lost talkbacks In this last of meeting places We grope together And avoid speech Gathered on this beach of the soiled sock Sightless, unless The eyes reappear As the perpetual star Multifoliate turd Of Harry's twilight kingdom The hope only Of CHOPPED men. V Here we go round the DVD column DVD column DVD column Here we go round the DVD column At two o’clock in the afternoon. Between the idea And the reality Between the motion And the act Falls the CHOPPAH For Thine is the Kingdom Between INCEPTION And the fellation Between the emotion And the response Falls the CHOPPAH Life is very long Between the desire And the spasm Between the potency And the existence Between the essence And the descent Falls the CHOPPAH For Thine is the Kingdom For Thine is Life is For Thine is the This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends This is the way the world ends Not with a bang but a CHOPPAH.

  • Sure, he was already crying because of being married to Annette Benning, but still...

  • March 30, 2011, noon CST

    Annette Benning ALWAYS looks pissed

    by Knobules

    Hollywood must love taunting here with Oscars just to get that lemon face out of her. Its hysterical.

  • April 1, 2011, 1:56 p.m. CST

    Good call, Knobules

    by Cletus Van Damme