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Moriarty's Rumblings from the Lab #23

Published at:  Dec 22, 1999 6:55:25 AM CST

Harry here... hands cramping from formatting this Rumblings.... fingers tired.... must sleeeep.... contemplate list later.... zzzzzzzzzzzzz





Hey, Head Geek...

"Moriarty" here.

It's going to be a quick one today, and you'll see
why at the end. No time for random evil... let's get
started.

CURSES! FOILED AGAIN!



You know, I was really looking forward to today's
column and being all contentious and being the sole
critic to stand up to the charms of Dreamworks' new
GALAXY QUEST. After all, my dirty little fanboy
secret is that I just unreservedly detest STAR TREK
and all things related to it. I have had a few
moments where I've liked individual TREK moments, but
for the most part, I can't stomach the show and
especially Trekkies. I'm not saying someone isn't
welcome to be a fan of the show; just don't try the
Vulcan Nerve Pinch on me, 'cause I'll go AMOK TIME on
your ass.

But darn if the film isn't growing on me. I saw it
last week, and when I walked out, I was impressed
technically, but I was still resisting the film
itself. Now that it's been a number of days, I have to
admit it... it's sticking with me. I can't help
myself. I laughed out loud any number of times in the
theater, and I still tried to resist. Well, to borrow
another TREK phrase, "resistance is futile."

Credit director Dean Parisot for that. Betcha
didn't know he was an Oscar winner. I'm a big fan of
his early success, too, a short film called "The
Appointments of Dennis Jennings." It was co-written
by and starred comedian Steven Wright, and it's a
genuinely witty little slice of absurdism. I'm
surprised it took Parisot all the way to last year's
HOME FRIES to direct a feature, but I suppose he's
doing a nice job so far. HOME FRIES was entirely
enjoyable on its own terms, even if it wasn't really
an ambitious film. It just sort of wanted to coast
along on this amiable goofball quality that Parisot
really nailed, and for the most part, it did.

GALAXY QUEST is much the same way. It doesn't seem
to want to work to hard to impress. Either you're
going to buy into the film's premise or you're not.
It's a little THREE AMIGOS, a little BUG'S LIFE, and
it's handled with such a light, confident touch by
David Howard and Robert Gordon that you won't even
notice the set-up as it races by. The trailers really
are the whole premise: aliens think the show is real,
abduct the crew to help them fight bad guy, much
hilarity ensues. It doesn't hurt the film a bit,
though, since there's a lot of sly character writing
packed into pretty much every major sequence.

Tony Shaloub is the guy who's going to walk away
from this one looking like a genius. He is even more
ideally cast than Alan Rickman, who is, I must admit,
a pretty spectacular stand-in for Spock. Sigourney
Weaver strikes a witty blow for every hottie who's
ever been squeezed into a spacesuit and given nothing
to do, and it's nice to see her funny bone hasn't
gotten any less precise over the years.

Tim Allen's a bit of a surprise in the film. He
never once seemed anything less than 100% dedicated to
the film, and his energy actually makes a good deal of
it work. Harold Ramis walked from this film when
Dreamworks insisted on using Allen, and at the time it
made perfect sense to me. Now, though, I'm starting
to think Ramis should have ridden it out. I think
this film's way more entertaining than Ramis'
overrated ANALYZE THIS from last spring, and it's
because the film has enough faith in the story it's
telling to let some moments be serious, while fully
embracing the silliness inherent in some other key
moments. Allen manages to get the pomposity of a
William Shatner just right, and he also lets us see
what's behind it. It's even better than the work
Shatner did making fun of himself in FREE ENTERPRISE
this year.

I also can't overstate the impact that ILM and Stan
Winston made on me in this film. They both contribute
great, great work that really sells the reality. In
particular, there's a money shot that comes about 20
minutes into the movie, a moment when Parisot tries
something really risky in the actual format of the
film, that pays off beautifully. It's not a joke, but
it sure sells one. Winston's design of the aliens is
nice, better than his big monsters, and it could serve
as a lesson to George Lucas: Niemoudians didn't have
to suck.

Overall, I think this film is going to play
beautifully to anyone who's already in touch with
their inner fanboy, and I'm living proof that it can
even entertain beyond that. With so much pain and
somberness at the theater this season, it's nice
there's at least one comedy that delivers the goods
with equal aplomb.

PIXAR OWNS THE WORLD, TAKE 2



As a friend of mine and I were leaving TOY STORY 2,
I said, "It's a shame they didn't do bloopers with
this film. That's one of the greatest things about
BUG'S LIFE." Well, starting this weekend, they're
going to be sending a new final reel to theaters
across the country, and we'll see exactly what I asked
for. There's a reason John Lasseter keeps getting
called a genius... he is one.

HERE COMES THE BIG LIST... REAL BIG



I'm starting my '90s retrospective article in a matter
of days, and I've decided to include a list of all
eligible titles here for you guys to check out:

1990 -- 4101 TITLES TOTAL

The Adventures of Ford Fairlane

After Dark, My Sweet

After the Rain

Alice

Angel at My Table

Avalon

Awakenings

Back to the Future Part III

Bad Influence

Bonfire Of The Vanities

Cadillac Man

Creature Comforts

Cry-Baby

Dances with Wolves

Darkman

Dick Tracy

Die Hard 2

Edward Scissorhands

Everybody Wins

Exorcist III, The

The Freshman

Ghost

The Godfather Part III

GoodFellas

Gremlins 2: The New Batch

Grifters, The

Guardian, The

The Hairdresser's Husband

Hardware

Henry & June

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer

House Party

Hunt for Red October, The

I Love You to Death

Internal Affairs

Jacob's Ladder

Joe Versus the Volcano

Ju Dou

King of New York

Life Is Sweet

Longtime Companion

Memphis Belle

Men at Work

Men Don't Leave

Mermaids

Metropolitan

Miami Blues

Miller's Crossing

Misery

Mo' Better Blues

Mr. & Mrs. Bridge

Mr. Destiny

Music Box

My Blue Heaven

Nightbreed

Nikita (La Femme Nikita)

Presumed Innocent

Pretty Woman

Pump Up The Volume

Q&A

Quick Change

Rescuers Down Under, The

Reversal of Fortune

Riff-Raff

Rocky V

Roller Coaster Rabbit

The Rookie

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead

Russia House, The

The Sheltering Sky

Solar Crisis

Spaced Invaders

State Of Grace

Tales From The Darkside - The Movie

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

To Sleep with Anger

Total Recall

Tremors

Trust

Two Evil Eyes

The Two Jakes

The Unbelievable Truth

Vincent & Theo

White Hunter, Black Heart

White Palace

Wild at Heart

Witches, The

Without You I'm Nothing

Young Guns II

1991 -- 4064 TITLES TOTAL

The Addams Family

The Adjuster

Another You

Backdraft

Barton Fink

Beauty and the Beast

Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey

Billy Bathgate

Blood in the Face

Boyz N the Hood

Bugsy

Cape Fear

City of Hope

City Slickers

The Commitments

Cool as Ice

Curly Sue

Dark Backward, The

Dead Again

Defending Your Life

Delicatessen

Dice Rules

Doc Hollywood

Dogfight

The Doors

Dutch

Dying Young

The Fisher King

Flirting

Frankie and Johnny

Grand Canyon

Guilty by Suspicion

Hard Way, The

Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man

Hear My Song

Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker's Apocalypse

Heavy Petting

Homicide

Hook

Hudson Hawk

The Indian Runner

JFK

Jumpin' at the Boneyard

Jungle Fever

The Last Boy Scout

Life Stinks

Light Sleeper

Little Man Tate

London Kills Me

Madonna: Truth Or Dare

The Man In The Moon

A Midnight Clear

The Miracle

Mobsters

Monster In A Box

Mortal Thoughts

My Own Private Idaho

Naked Lunch

New Jack City

Night on Earth

Nothing But Trouble

Only The Lonely

Oscar

Point Break

Poison

The Prince Of Tides

Proof

Prospero's Books

Rambling Rose

The Rapture

Regarding Henry

Ricochet

Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

The Rocketeer

Roujin Z

Rubin and Ed

Run

Rush

Scenes From A Mall

Shakes The Clown

Silence Of The Lambs

Slacker

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

Switch

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Secret Of The Ooze

Terminator 2: Judgement Day

Thelma and Louise

V.I. Warshawski

What About Bob?

35 Up

1992 -- 4891 TITLES TOTAL

Aileen Wuronos: The Selling Of A Serial Killer

Aladdin

Alien³

American Heart

American Me

Bad Lieutenant

Basic Instinct

Batman Returns

Belle époque

Bob Roberts

Bodyguard, The

Bram Stoker's Dracula

Brother's Keeper

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Chaplin

Christopher Columbus: The Discovery

Consenting Adults

Cool World

Cousin Bobby

The Crying Game

Death Becomes Her

Dust Devil

El Mariachi

Encino Man

Far and Away

A Few Good Men

Gas Food Lodging

Glengarry Glen Ross

A Grand Day Out

Hoffa

Home Alone 2: Alone In New York

Honeymoon In Vegas

Howard's End

Husbands and Wives

In The Soup

Incident At Ogala

Into The West

Jamon Jamon

Kafka

The Last Of The Mohicans

A League Of Their Own

Leolo

Leap Of Faith

Lethal Weapon 3

Like Water For Chocolate

Lorenzo's Oil

Malcolm X

Man Bites Dog

Map Of The Human Heart

Medicine Man

Memoirs Of An Invisible Man

Mr. Saturday Night

My Cousin Vinny

Noises Off!

Of Mice and Men

Passion Fish

The People Under The Stairs

The Player

Prelude To A Kiss

Radio Flyer

Raising Cain

Reservoir Dogs

A River Runs Through It

Romper Stomper

Scent Of A Woman

Simple Men

Single White Female

Singles

Sleepwalkers

Sneakers

Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot

Strictly Ballroom

Swoon

Thunderheart

Toys

Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me

Under Siege

Unforgiven

Visions Of Light: The Art Of Cinematography

The Waterdance

Wax, Or The Discovery Of Television Among The Bees

Wayne's World

White Men Can't Jump

1492: Conquest Of Paradise

1991: The Year Punk Broke

1993 -- 5209 TITLES TOTAL

Addams Family Values

The Age Of Innocence

Alive

Army Of Darkness

Backbeat

Batman: Mask Of The Phantasm

Being Human

Benny & Joon

Blue (dir. Derek Jarman)

Bodies, Rest & Motion

Body Snatchers

Boiling Point

Boxing Helena

The Boys Of St. Vincent

A Bronx Tale

Calendar

Carlito's Way

Cliffhanger

Coneheads

Cop And A Half

A Dangerous Woman

The Dark Half

Dave

Dazed & Confused

Dennis The Menace

Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story

Even Cowgirls Get The Blues

Falling Down

Fearless

Fire In The Sky

The Firm

Flesh and Bone

The Fugitive

Groundhog Day

Grumpy Old Men

Hard Target

In The Line Of Fire

In The Name Of The Father

Indecent Proposal

The Joy Luck Club

Jurassic Park

Kalifornia

King Of The Hill

The Last Action Hero

M. Butterfly

Mad Dog And Glory

Manhattan Murder Mystery

Menace II Society

Mrs. Doubtfire

Much Ado About Nothing

Naked

Needful Things

The Nightmare Before Christmas

A Perfect World

Philadelphia

The Piano

The Pickle

Point Of No Return

The Positively True Adventures Of The Alleged Texas-
Cheerleader Murdering Mom (HBO)

Remains Of The Day

Romeo Is Bleeding

Ruby In Paradise

Rudy

Schindler's List

Searching For Bobby Fischer

The Secret Garden

Short Cuts

Six Degrees Of Separation

Sleepless In Seattle

Sliver

So I Married An Axe Murderer

Sommersby

Son Of The Pink Panther

Super Mario Brothers


Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III

Thirty-Two Short Films About Glenn Gould

Three Colors: Blue

Totally F**ked Up

True Romance

Two Small Bodies

The Vanishing

Les Visiteurs

What's Eating Gilbert Grape

What's Love Got To Do With It

The Wrong Trousers

1994 -- 5700 TITLES TOTAL

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert

Ashes Of Time

Bandit Queen

Barcelona

Before The Rain

Beverly Hills Cop III

Blankman

Blown Away

Blue Sky

Bullets Over Broadway

Cabin Boy

Chungking Express

City Slickers II: The Search For Curly's Gold

Clean Slate

Clear and Present Danger

Clerks

The Client

Clifford

Cobb

Cold Fever

Cold Water

Cops And Robbersons

Crooklyn

The Crow

Crumb

Dellamorte Dellamore

Drunken Master II

Dumb & Dumber

Ed Wood

Exit To Eden

Exotica

Faust

The Flintstones

Forrest Gump

Four Weddings And A Funeral

Frankenstein

Fresh

Go Fish

A Great Day In Harlem

Grosse Fatigue

Heavenly Creatures

Hoop Dreams

The Hudsucker Proxy

I'll Do Anything

Interview With The Vampire

It's Pat

Jason's Lyric

Jimmy Hollywood

Junior

Killing Zoe

Ladybird Ladybird

The Last Seduction

Legends Of The Fall

The Lion King

The Madness Of King George

The Mask

Maya Lin: A Clear Strong Vision

Il Mostro

Mrs. Parker & The Vicious Circle

Mute Witness

Natural Born Killers

Nell

The New Age

Nobody's Fool

North

Oleanna

Once Were Warriors

Priest

Pret-A-Porter

The Professional

Pulp Fiction

Quiz Show

Radioland Murders

Reality Bites

The Ref

The Road To Wellville

The Secret Of Roan Inish

The Shadow

Shallow Grave

The Shawshank Redemption

Sirens

Sleep With Me

Spanking The Monkey

Speed

Star Trek: Generations

Stargate

Swimming With Sharks

Three Colors: Rouge

Three Colors: White

Through The Olive Trees

To Live

True Lies

Vanya On 42nd Street

Wes Craven's New Nightmare

What Happened Was...

Wolf

1995 -- 5822 TITLES TOTAL

Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls

The Addiction

American Job

The American President

Apollo 13

Arabian Knight (a.k.a. The Thief And The Cobbler)

An Awfully Big Adventure

Babe

Bad Boys

The Basketball Diaries

Batman Forever

Before Sunrise

Billy Madison

Boys On The Side

The Brady Bunch Movie

Braveheart

The Bridges Of Madison County

The Brothers McMullen

Canadian Bacon

Candyman: Farewell To The Flesh

Casino

Casper

The Celluloid Closet

City Of Lost Children

Clean, Shaven

Clockers

A Close Shave

Clueless

Coldblooded

Congo

Copycat

Crimson Tide

The Crossing Guard

Cutthroat Island

Dead Man

Dead Man Walking

Dead Presidents

Demon Knight

Desperado

Devil In A Blue Dress

Die Hard With A Vengeance

Delores Claiborne

Don Juan DeMarco

The Doom Generation

Empire Records

The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill But Came Down
A Mountain

Fallen Angels

Four Rooms

Frank and Ollie

Friday

Funny Bones

Georgia

Get Shorty

Goldeneye

Hackers

Heat

Heavy

Heidi Fleiss: Hollywood Madam

Higher Learning

Home For The Holidays

Il Postino

In The Mouth Of Madness

The Incredibly True Adventure Of Two Girls In Love

The Indian In The Cupboard

Jade

The Jerky Boys

Johnny Mnemonic

Judge Dredd

Just Cause

Kicking And Screaming

Kids

Land And Freedom

The Last Supper

Leaving Las Vegas

A Little Princess

Living In Oblivion

Lord Of Illusions

Lumiere & Company

Mad Love

Mallrats

Mighty Aphrodite

Money Train

Mortal Kombat

Mr. Holland's Opus

Murder In The First

The Net

Nick Of Time

Nine Months

Nixon

Nowhere

Party Girl

Pocahontas

Powder

The Quick And The Dead

Restoration

Richard III

Rob Roy

Sabrina

Safe

The Scarlet Letter

Screamers

Se7en

Sense And Sensibility

Showgirls

Something To Talk About

Species

Steal Big, Steal Little

Strange Days

Stuart Saves His Family

Sudden Death

Tall Tale

Tank Girl

Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead

Tokyo Fist

Tommy Boy

Total Eclipse

Toy Story

Twelve Monkeys

Underground

Unstrung Heroes

The Usual Suspects

Vampire In Brooklyn

Village Of The Damned

Virtuosity

Waiting To Exhale

A Walk In The Clouds

Waterworld

Welcome To The Dollhouse

While You Were Sleeping

White Man's Burden

The Young Poisoner's Handbook

1996 -- 5655 TITLES TOTAL

Albino Alligator

American Buffalo

Angels & Insects

The Arrival

Ashes Of Time

Barb Wire

Basquiat

Bastard Out Of Carolina

The Battle Over Citizen Kane

Beautiful Girls

Beavis and Butt-Head Do America

Big Night

The Birdcage

Bottle Rocket

Bound

Box Of Moonlight

Breaking The Waves

Broken Arrow

The Cable Guy

Chain Reaction

The Chamber

Citizen Ruth

City Hall

Cosi

Courage Under Fire

Crash

The Crucible

Curdled

Daylight

The Daytrippers

Diabolique

Dragonheart

Emma

The English Patient

Eraser

Escape From LA

Everyone Says I Love You

Evita

Extreme Measures

Faithful

The Fan

Fargo

Fear

Feeling Minnesota

Flirting With Disaster

Fly Away Home

Forgotten Silver

Freeway

The Frighteners

From Dusk Till Dawn

Get On The Bus

The Ghost and The Darkness

Ghosts Of Mississippi

Girl 6

Grace Of My Heart

Gray's Anatomy

Hamlet

Happy Gilmore

Hard Eight (a.k.a. Sydney)

Harriet The Spy

Head Above Water

Heaven's Prisoners

The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Hype!

I Shot Andy Warhol

Illtown

Independence Day

Irma Vep

The Island Of Dr. Moreau

Jack

James and The Giant Peach

Jerry Maguire

Jingle All The Way

Jude

The Juror

Kansas City

Kazaam

Kids In The Hall: Brain Candy

Kingpin

Kolya

Larger Than Life

Last Man Standing

Lone Star

The Long Kiss Goodnight

Looking For Richard

Love And Other Catastrophes

Mad Dog Time

Manny & Lo

Mars Attacks!

Marvin's Room

Mary Reilly

Matilda

Michael

Michael Collins

Microcosmos

The Mirror Has Two Faces

Mission: Impossible

Moll Flanders

Mother

Mother Night

Mulholland Falls

Multiplicity

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie

Normal Life

The Nutty Professor

Once Upon A Time...When We Were Colored

The Pallbearer

Palookaville

Paradise Lost: The Child Murders At Robin Hood Hills

The People Versus Larry Flynt

The Phantom

Phenomenon

The Pillow Book

Ponette

The Portrait Of A Lady

Primal Fear

Ransom

Ridicule

The Rock

Romeo + Juliet

Schizopolis

Scream

The Secret Agent

Secrets and Lies

Set It Off

Shall We Dance?

She's The One

Shine

Sleepers

Sling Blade

Space Jam

Star Trek: First Contact

Striptease

The Stupids

The Sunchaser

Surviving Picasso

That Thing You Do!

This Is Cuba

Tin Cup

Trainspotting

Trees Lounge

Trigger Effect

The Truth About Cats And Dogs

Twister

The Typewriter, The Rifle & The Movie Camera

Unhook The Stars

The Van

A Very Brady Sequel

Waiting For Guffman

Walking and Talking

When We Were Kings

White Squall

The Whole Wide World

The Wife

1997 - 6184 TITLES TOTAL

Absolute Power

Addicted To Love

Afterglow

Air Force One

An Alan Smithee Film: Burn Hollywood Burn

Alien: Resurrection

An American Werewolf In Paris

Amistad

Anaconda

Anastasia

The Apostle

Artemesia

As Good As It Gets

Austin Powers: International Man Of Mystery

Batman & Robin

Bean

The Big One

Boogie Nights

The Borrowers

The Boxer

The Brave

Buddy

Chasing Amy

Clockwatchers

Commandments

Con Air

Conspiracy Theory

Contact

Cop Land

Cube

Dante's Peak

Deconstructing Harry

The Devil's Advocate

Donnie Brasco

Double Team

The Edge

The End Of Violence

Eve's Bayou

Event Horizon

Eye Of God

Face/Off

Fairy Tale: A True Story

Fast, Cheap & Out Of Control

Fathers' Day

Fierce Creatures

The Fifth Element

Floating

Flubber

The Full Monty

Funny Games

G.I. Jane

The Game

Gattaca

George Of The Jungle

Good Will Hunting

Gridlock'd

Grosse Pointe Blank

Gummo

Hana-bi

Hands On A Hardbody - The Documentary

Henry Fool

Hercules

The House Of Yes

Hugo Pool

I Know What You Did Last Summer

The Ice Storm

In & Out

In The Company Of Men

The Jackal

Jackie Brown

Jungle2Jungle

Kundun

LA Confidential

A Life Less Ordinary

Lolita

Lost Highway

The Lost World: Jurassic Park

Love and Death On Long Island

Ma Vie En Rose

Meet Wally Sparks

Men In Black

Men With Guns

Mimic

Mononoke Hime

Mouse Hunt

Mr. Jealousy

Mrs. Brown

My Best Friend's Wedding

The Myth Of Fingerprints

Niagara, Niagara

Nils By Mouth

One Eight Seven

Orgazmo

Oscar & Lucinda

Perfect Blue

The Postman

Prefontaine

The Rainmaker

The Real Blonde

The Relic

Romy & Michele's High School Reunion

Seven Years In Tibet

Shiloh

Shooting Fish

Sick: The Life & Death of Bob Flanagan, upermasochist

Soul Food

Space Truckers

The Spanish Prisoner

Spawn

Speed 2: Cruise Control

Star Maps

Starship Troopers

SubUrbia

Suicide Kings

The Sweet Hereafter

Switchback

Telling Lies In America

This World, Then The Fireworks

Titanic

Tomorrow Never Dies

Touch

Traveller

Truth Or Consequences, N.M.

U-Turn

Ulee's Gold

Underground

Volcano

Waco: The Rules Of Engagement

Wag The Dog

Welcome To Sarajevo

Welcome To Woop Woop

Wilde

The Wings Of The Dove

4 Little Girls

1998 -- 6402 TITLES TOTAL

The Acid House

The Adventures Of Sebastian Cole

Affliction

American History X

Among Giants

Another Day In Paradise

Antz

Apt Pupil

Armageddon

The Avengers

Babe: Pig In The City

BASEketball

Beloved

The Big Hit

The Big Lebowski

Blade

Blues Brothers 2000

The Brandon Teena Story

Bride Of Chucky

Broken Vessels

Buffalo '66

A Bug's Life

Bulworth

Celebrity

Central Station

City Of Angels

A Civil Action

Claire Dolan

Clay Pigeons

Cousin Bette

Dancer, Texas, Pop. 81

Dangerous Beauty

Dark City

Deep Impact

Deep Rising

Dog Park

Elizabeth

Enemy Of The State

The Faculty

Fallen

The Farm: Angola, USA

Fear & Loathing In Las Vegas

The Gingerbread Man

God Said, "Ha!"

Gods and Monsters

Godzilla

Great Expectations

Halloween H20: Twenty Years Later

Happiness

He Got Game

The Hi-Lo Country

Hideous Kinky

High Art

Hilary and Jackie

Holy Man

Home Fries

Homegrown

The Horse Whisperer

How Stella Got Her Groove Back

Hurlyburly

Hurricane Streets

The Imposters

Jack Frost

Jerry & Tom

Kurt & Courtney

The Last Broadcast

The Last Days Of Disco

Last Night

Life Is Beautiful

Little Voice

Living Out Loud

Lock, Stock, & Two Smoking Barrels

Lost In Space

The Mask Of Zorro

Meet Joe Black

Mighty Joe Young

The Mighty

Mulan

My Name Is Joe

My Son The Fanatic

The Negotiator

New Rose Hotel

The Newton Boys

Next Stop Wonderland

The Object Of My Affection

The Odd Couple II

One True Thing

The Opposite Of Sex

Out Of Sight

Patch Adams

Pecker

A Perfect Murder

Permanent Midnight

Pi

Playing By Heart

Pleasantville

Practical Magic

A Price Above Rubies

Primary Colors

The Prince Of Egypt

Psycho

Razor Blade Smile

The Replacement Killers

Restaurant

Ronin

Rounders

Rush Hour

Rushmore

Safe Men

Saving Private Ryan

Scotch and Milk

Shakespeare In Love

The Siege

Simon Birch

A Simple Plan

Six Days, Seven Nights

Six-String Samurai

Slam

Sliding Doors

Slums Of Beverly Hills

Small Soldiers

Smoke Signals

Snake Eyes

Soldier

A Soldier's Daughter Never Cries

Sour Grapes

Species II

Sphere

Star Trek: Insurrection

Stepmom

Still Crazy

Susan's Plan

Tango

The Theory Of Flight

There's Something About Mary

The Thin Red Line

The Truman Show

Vampires

Velvet Goldmine

Very Bad Things

WADD: The Life & Times Of John C. Holmes

Waking Ned Devine

The Waterboy

The Wedding Singer

What Dreams May Come

Wide Awake

Wild Man Blues

Wild Things

Without Limits

The Wonderful Ice Cream Suit

The Wrong Guy

The X Files

You've Got Mail

Your Friends & Neighbors

Zero Effect

54

1999 -- 6116 TITLES TOTAL

After Life

American Beauty

American Movie

American Pie

Analyze This

Angela's Ashes

Anna and the King

Any Given Sunday

Anywhere But Here

Arlington Road

The Astronaut's Wife

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me

Autumn Tale

Baby Geniuses

Being John Malkovich

The Best Man

Beyond The Mat

Bicentennial Man

The Big Brass Ring

Big Daddy

The Blair Witch Project

Blast From The Past

The Bone Collector

Bowfinger

Boys Don't Cry

Breakfast Of Champions

Bringing Out The Dead

Buena Vista Social Club

The Castle

The Cider House Rules

Cookie's Fortune

The Corruptor

Cradle Will Rock

Crazy In Alabama

The Cruise

Deep Blue Sea

Detroit Rock City

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo

Dick

The Dinner Game

Dogma

Double Jeopardy

Drive Me Crazy

Drop Dead Gorgeous

Dudley Do-Right

East Is East

ED TV

Election

End Of Days

The End Of The Affair

Entrapment

eXistenZ

Eyes Wide Shut

Felicia's Journey

Fight Club

Flawless

For Love Of The Game

Galaxy Quest

Genghis Blues

Girl, Interrupted

Go

The Green Mile

Happy, Texas

The Haunting

Holy Smoke

House On Haunted Hill

The Hurricane

An Ideal Husband

Idle Hands

In Dreams

The Insider

Inspector Gadget

Instinct

The Iron Giant

Jakob The Liar

Joe The King

Julien Donkey-Boy

Lake Placid

Liberty Heights

Life

Limbo

The Limey

The Loss Of Sexual Innocence

Love's Labour's Lost

Magnolia

Man On The Moon

Mansfield Park

A Map Of The World

The Matrix

Meeting People Is Easy

Message In A Bottle

The Messenger: The Story Of Joan Of Arc

A Midsummer Night's Dream

The Minus Man

Miss Julie

The Mod Squad

Molly

Mr. Death: The Rise and Fall of Fred A. Leuchter Jr.

Mumford

The Mummy

The Muse

My Life So Far

Mystery Men

Mystery, Alaska

Never Been Kissed

Notting Hill

October Sky

Office Space

Outside Providence

Payback

Plunkett & Macleane

Pola X

Pushing Tin

The Rage: Carrie 2

Random Hearts

Ravenous

Ride With The Devil

Romance

Rosetta

Run Lola Run

The Sixth Sense

Sleepy Hollow

Snow Falling On Cedars

South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

Stigmata

A Stir Of Echoes

The Story Of Us

The Straight Story

Stuart Little

Sugar Town

Summer of Sam

Superstar

Sweet and Lowdown

The Talented Mr. Ripley

Tarzan

Tea With Mussolini

Teaching Mrs. Tingle

The Thirteenth Floor

The Thomas Crown Affair

Three Kings

Three Seasons

Titus

Topsy-Turvy

Toy Story 2

Tumbleweeds

Twin Falls Idaho

Two Hands

Virus

A Walk On The Moon

The War Zone

Wild Wild West

Wing Commander

The Winslow Boy

The Wood

The World Is Not Enough

Xiu Xiu The Sent-Down Girl

10 Things I Hate About You

The 13th Warrior

200 Cigarettes

42 Up

8MM

Keep in mind, this is a list for consideration as
best and worst in all categories. If you see
something I've missed, please let me know. I used the
IMDb to try and compile this list, sifting through
thousands of titles for each year, and I'm sure there
are numerous foreign titles I didn't recognize in
their original language. Check it out, and I'll catch
you with part one of the series in a matter of days.
Until then...

"Moriarty" out.



    + Expand All

    Readers Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 7:15:31 AM CST

    what the?

    by rhames111

    exactly???????????

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 7:57:00 AM CST

    Did'nt You skip something ?

    by fairlane

    dear Moriarty. It could be my english but what the hell is this?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 8:01:44 AM CST

    But what are the categories?

    by r_dimitri22

    What are the categories for best and worst? Also, I believe the IMDB lists Run Lola Run as being released in 1998, though it didn't get to the states until this year.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 8:02:38 AM CST

    I assume best and worst of each year, but I'm not sure...

    by r_dimitri22

  • Dec 22, 1999 8:10:54 AM CST

    something's missing

    by kev

    i was looking forward to a nice wee moriarty-style retrospective rambling about des 'Q' llewelyn but its nowhere to be seen. how come?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 8:53:44 AM CST

    erm...

    by gag halfrunt

    and the point of all that exactly?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 9:30:57 AM CST

    Moriarity you evil bastard I read your book...

    by iwrite

    Clerks and The Crow better make it onto your list you old fool...grrr...

    Reply to Talkback

  • Thanks for doing this, Moriarty. I've been thinking of doing the same thing, but you just saved me a whole lot o' time that I don't have. Being something of a completist, I can tell already that I'll be adding to this.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 10:16:04 AM CST

    Robert Bresson Died.....

    by mrbeaks

    I guess he wasn't necessarily a "cool" filmmaker, but he sure was a great one. I just figured someone should say *something.* And, I guess, I just did.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 10:52:34 AM CST

    Best Swayze Movie Line?

    by badashe

    Now this doesn't have to be one that he said, but it has to be in a Swayze movie. My top 2: "Nobody puts Baby in the corner!" and "You're gonna be my regular Saturday night thing!" from Roadhouse. It's line like those that make me thank God that we live in country where Swayze can make great cinema. Long live Swayze.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 10:52:50 AM CST

    Ford Farline Kicks ass

    by scott1458

    Nuff said.

    Damn dude, you gotta lot of time on your hands don't you?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 11:08:47 AM CST

    hey, you forgot...

    by hotspur

    no way, I really don't know

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 11:19:52 AM CST

    The List

    by seguezagnut

    I believe he posted the list to establish the contenders. In other words... if the movie had any kind of hit on the radar screen, it should be looked at for BEST and WORST of the decade. Theoretically, if a movie is missing then... it made no blip. So if you have a movie he forgot... tell him here. Otherwise make your own list from this one (trust me he is saving you a lot of time at the IMDB) and compare when he puts up his. I'm not speaking for the evil M here, this is just my interpretation. I just can't believe he didn't include 'Fuck My Dirty Shithole' from 1992... What a great movie!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 11:46:43 AM CST

    Top Under-rated movies of the 90s

    by alfred hitchcock

    Here are some that were just under-rated:

    Groundhog Day-A funny, touching story about how not being a bastard can be tough. Bill Murray gives a wonderful performance here.

    Jackie Brown-Quentin Tarantino's first movie after Pulp Fiction was shunned by most. I quess they didn't notice how well-directed it was and how Samuel L. Jackson and Pam Grier give two of the best performances seen in a long time.

    The Big Lebowski- The story of The Dude confused and confounded critics who laugh only at Albert Brooks' schlock, but this Coens Bros.' film is a hilarious story of a man trying to do the right thing in a world of nihilists, pedophiles, and enraged Vietnam vets. The Dude is a hero for the times.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 11:52:43 AM CST

    Swayze Movie Line

    by mechanimal

    No, no, the best, not by him, but in his movie, being of course, the almighty "Roadhouse": "I Used to Fuck guys Like you in Prison." Writing Immortal!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 12:34:44 PM CST

    Oh Haaaarrry....

    by zelig

    ...feeling slow and old? It's okay, just DONT PULL MY POSTS BECAUSE OF IT!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 1:08:50 PM CST

    "Groundhog Day" Best Movie of the Decade

    by smilin'jackruby

    Whoever mentioned this is right. If I had to line up every movie that I have seen multiple times, have enjoyed more each time, seen something new in, and slowly turned into worship, I would lay it at the feet of "Groundhog Day," one of the greatest movies about being a cynical bastard in the 90s. The look on Bill Murray's face when he walks in front of the oncoming truck makes it my pic of the decade.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 2:37:07 PM CST

    What's the point of the list, please?

    by all thumbs

    I don't understand....are you doing a best and worst of teh 90's as a whole or best and worst of each year. (Either way, good luck getting it done over the Holidays. But, then again, evil geniuses don't celebrate the holidays...wait! I take that back...look at Scrooge and the Grinch.) I love this new system of putting subject headers on the Rumblings. I swear I'm reading more of them instead of scanning and reading the bits I like.***BTW...Cry Baby better be on a good list because it's one of the best Waters films.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 3:36:37 PM CST

    Bizarro World

    by eegah

    What in GOD'S NAME was up with that list? After three titles I felt as if I was merely reading the demented ramblings of a man who is desperate to prove to the world how hip to movies he is. Or something. I'd try and puzzle it out if my eyes weren't so glazed over.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 3:46:15 PM CST

    Best Swayze Line

    by endo

    "Roadhouse" is, of course, the best source. The best line, though, is..."Be nice. Until it's time...to not be nice."

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 3:53:35 PM CST

    FILM OF THE CENTURY

    by eegah

    My picks:

    1)Police Academy 4: A darker entry in the series that explored the tangential relationships between the citizens and the thin blue line.

    2) The Exterminator 2: Robert Ginty's performance really took hold here, and the scenes with the black garbage man still get me.

    3) Newsies: Who can resist the nutty, yet charming antics of Christian Bale and Max Casella as they sing and dance their way through this Depression Era romp?

    4)Over the Top: By turns touching, tragic and triumphant, Sly Stallone and his multi-talented son, Max prove that even arm-wrestlers can have a heart.

    5)Vice Versa: The cute-as-a-button performances of Judge Reinhold and Fred Savage are simply delightful. (runner up: "18 Again" with the brilliant and talented Charlie Schattler)

    Honorable mentions: "Shakes the Clown", "Radioland Murders", "Hardbodies" and "Light of Day"

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 4:11:46 PM CST

    Another Great ROADHOUSE Quote

    by mrbeaks

    Later in the now-classic "be nice" scene, where Swayze lays down the Bouncer's creed..... Bouncer: What if he calls my mother a whore? Swayze: I don't know? Is she?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 4:38:13 PM CST

    Bresson's THE TRIAL OF JOAN OF ARC

    by mrbeaks

    Remember when everyone was rhapsodizing over Besson's THE MESSENGER? When I finally saw that pretty but completely boneheaded telling of the story, it spurred me to rent Bresson's JOAN OF ARC, which was far more illuminating. Of course, THE DEVIL PROBABLY was my introduction to the man's work, but I'd have to rank PICKPOCKET as my favorite. Perhaps, if he'd attended a few Star Trek conventions, he'd have been better represented here.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 5:05:03 PM CST

    The War Zone

    by tyrion_lannister

    I urge everyone to check The War Zone out. One of the best, if not the best, movies I've seen during 1999, and 1999 was an awesome year for movies. Glad to see it on the list, even one so big as this one, since no one's remembering The War Zone at any awards ceremonies.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 6:57:37 PM CST

    outakes

    by mmm_free_wig

    I have to comment on this again. I saw the outakes on Toy Story 2 in Melbourne, Australia 3 weeks ago, and they were the funniest part of the movie, they most definately got the most laughs in the cinema. I found them to be halarious and far more exciting than the Bug's Life outakes. It is worth admission again just to see them. Also, they run for about 3-4 minutes, that's if they don't cut it in half and half two lots like they did with a bug's life. The Aust. cut could be different. No one else I know has seen the outakes since the first night it was released here, I guess I was just lucky.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 8:14:16 PM CST

    it's long, it's pointless, it's utterly subjective - five-tone p

    by tommy five-tone

    this may take a while, but here goes (in no particular order): UNHERALDED GEMS: the bonfire of the vanities (yes, really), joe vs the volcano (hanks has rarely been better), meet joe black (i just crumble when brad pitt says 'thank you for loving me' to claire forlani), prelude to a kiss. WATCH WHEN DRUNK: ford fairlane (booty time, booty time!), tremors (be advised there are two more - i repeat, two more - mother humpers). WATCH WHEN BAKED: the doors, demon knight (billy zane will crack you up), velvet goldmine, body snatchers (abel ferrara version). BEST MUSICAL SCORE (please note, the music is NOT the only thing these films have going for them - they're all excellent in their own right): the ice storm, crash, nobody's fool (brings a tear to the eye), the truman show, american beauty, out of sight (fun-keh). MAIN REASON DIRECTORS' CUTS SHOULD BE MANDATORY: john woo's cut of hard target is kickass! ALL RIGHT FOR THE FIGHTIN' (among other reasons): blade (capoeira, baby!), the matrix ('i know kung fu' - priceless, keanu). ICONIC IMAGES (mainly body parts; one item of clothing): brad pitt's torso in fight club, samantha mathis's breasts in pump up the volume, michael rooker's reflection in the mirror on the henry: portrait of a serial killer poster, the hat in the forest in miller's crossing. MINI-MOVIES IN THEIR OWN RIGHT: jim carrey's karaoke version of 'somebody to love' in the cable guy, ray liotta's coke paranoia in goodfellas, any scene with jay and silent bob in clerks, liam neeson going buck-wild at the carnival and demanding frances mcdormand 'take the fucking elephant!' in darkman. PERFECT MOVIES (not the BEST, mind you, but flawless in terms in acting, direction, etc - no false moves from anyone involved...these movies are really good, but maybe lacking that certain something that makes them the kind of classic you worship, know what i mean?): ransom (i get chills when mel screams 'gimme back my son, you motherfucker!), jerry maguire (because 'you complete me' is such a great line). gotta go now, but i'll be back with more later.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 9:49:09 PM CST

    Get Me To The Five Tone, Tommy

    by mrbeaks

    Tommy, what about your namesake? Of course, I speak of HUDSON HAWK. This Bruce Willis classic just may make my top ten (oh, and you think I'm joking!)

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 10:49:08 PM CST

    tommy talks some shite, part 2

    by tommy five-tone

    back from eating a big sandwich, so here we go again. and by the way, mr beaks, it was foolish of me not to include 'the hawk' in the list of movies to enjoy when you've got a few ales in ya. thank you for setting me straight! TEXTBOOK PERFORMANCES (male, intense division): david thewlis in naked ('you don't wanna fuck me, luv, you'll catch something cruel'), alec baldwin in glengarry glen ross ('you see this watch? this watch cost more than your car') and the hands-down champeen - harvey keitel in bad lieutenant ('I DID SO MANY BAD THINGS!!!'). MOST VALUABLE PLAYER (male): jeff bridges (supercool in 'the fabulous baker boys' - is that a '90s movie?, legendary in 'the fisher king', downright fucking awe-inspiring in 'fearless'), with bill murray running a very close second for quick change, groundhog day ('i love poetry - i just thought that was WILLARD scott'), ed wood and rushmore. CLOSE TO MAJESTY, BUT NOT QUITE: tin cup (starts off just as good as bull durham, but loses its way in the final third - good sentiment, just poorly executed), fearless (peter weir is god, and this is almost his finest creation, but even god makes the odd mistake...and this mistake is named rosie fucking perez...sorry, maestro weir, but her grating presence is a fly in the ointment, a monkey in the wrench, a pain in the ass). SECOND GREATEST MOVIE OF THE '90s: true romance (you know it's true, because it's got gary oldman's best line ever: 'now i know i'm pretty...but i ain't as pretty as a couple of titties' - bonus points for coming up with the phrase 'white boy day'). and here it is...THE GREATEST MOVIE OF THE 1990s: KING OF NEW YORK. that's right - every line of dialogue a quotable classic, every performance a winner, abel ferrara's direction is brilliant, the soundtrack kicks ass. walken has never been better, and caruso, snipes, fishburne et al are sooooo coooool. OK, let the flames begin.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 22, 1999 10:59:31 PM CST

    shit, almost forgot...

    by tommy five-tone

    sorry about this, but what would the holiday season be without this category - BEST VIOLENCE (physical): the last boy scout (when bruce 'if you touch me again i'll kill ya' willis slams a henchman's nose into his brain). BEST VIOLENCE (verbal): unforgiven ('yeah, i killed women and children...i've killed just about everything that walks or crawls at one time or another...and now i'm gonna kill you, little bill...for what you did to ned.' damn that's cool). and if i don't talk to you beforehand - merry christmas, everyone!!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 23, 1999 1:48:29 AM CST

    whoa...

    by twisted mentat

    So many good movies i've not seen yet...so many bad ones i HAVE...
    and werid stuff that my friends have made me watch because "they were funny when i'm drunk"...

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 23, 1999 9:15:45 AM CST

    what about STEAM?

    by fonebone

  • Dec 23, 1999 9:42:16 AM CST

    STEAM! Will Be The First Great Film Of The Next Decade

    by mrbeaks

  • I admit, their lame immitation of you was pathetic and unflattering because you would have figured out what Picard and crew were doing long before they could ever win. But really, thanks for not slamming Trek all the time. I didn't even know you didn't like it until now. But then, you are evil, and Star Trek hasn't done good villains for a loooooooong time. Oh yes, THANK YOU for saying what needs to be said. Anaylyze This WAS overrated!

    Reply to Talkback

  • No one on the planet can convey the deep heart felt sentiments of the average Joe than Patrick. He fought for the truck drivers of america in Black Dog which is a near shakesperian depiction of modern life. Who can forget Captain Ron this wonderful comedy probably had many a man shooting Budweiser beer through their nostrals. Also many women in their
    modular prefabricated homes are probably sitting on the couch in their Wal Mart spandex pants and ugly floral pattern shirts crying their eyes out to Dirty Dancing.(ok I admit that's quite a bulky sentance. Other wise it's right on the money.) Everyone tonight in your back yard do the following in respect of Swayze.
    1.tie out your dog to a tree.
    2.grab a cold one
    3.throw dixie on the 8 track.
    4.burn a pile of tires.
    5. finally put a new part on that
    pinto that sits on blocks in your yard.
    God Bless Patrick Swayze!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 23, 1999 12:39:41 PM CST

    Chasing Amy , MallRats and Clerks

    by yellow

    Include these please (eating cheese, on your knees, with Cleese)!!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 23, 1999 12:42:02 PM CST

    oops

    by yellow

    I meant in the best only catagories.... not the worst catagories... cos you obviously have them in your lsit and everything.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 23, 1999 1:56:17 PM CST

    Best film of the century...

    by not_a_jedi_yet

    Wes Craven's "Deadly Friend" (1986), without a doubt. Matthew Laborteaux displayed the same genius he so finely honed on "Little House." A must-see for anyone who's into computer-brain-transplant-horror-romance flicks.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 23, 1999 8:36:25 PM CST

    You forgot Cannibal!:The Musical

    by 0007

    Put Cannibal!: The Musical down for either 1993 (its original release at festivals), or 1996 (the year it became available for public-consumption, no pun intended). Besides being the funniest musical of all time, it gave a career start to Trey Parker and Matt Stone. You have to admit they have impacted comedy big time the past few years. Other than that, I would say "Surviving Desire", the best of Hal Hartley's films. Otherwise, very good list you compiled; you even remembered Bram Stoker's Dracula, Orgazmo, Blues Brothers 2000, Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, Interview with the Vampire, and Eyes Wide Shut...

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 24, 1999 2:45:49 PM CST

    Before Sunrise

    by gag halfrunt

    "Before Sunrise" - Damn i love that film...the only romantic film that guys can actually watch without feeling ill. Anybody else remember this one? What's the verdict?

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 24, 1999 4:29:28 PM CST

    Captain Ron?

    by tv`snick

    Patrick Swayze was NOT in Captain Ron, giggleguts. That was Kurt Russell! Get it stright, poopyplant! Patrick Swayze is, according to Jean at The Onion, the HUNK OF THE MILLENIUM! Know your place, lillyliver!

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 24, 1999 11:29:02 PM CST

    Top 10 for article

    by samthelion

    I know you probably don't care, but here's my tentative top 10 list that I'll be putting in a local paper.

    In Alphabetical Order:
    Dazed and Confused,
    Ed Wood,
    Fargo,
    Fearless,
    Goodfellas,
    Malcolm X,
    The Player,
    Pulp Fiction,
    Schindler's List,
    The Shawshank Redeption.

    Worst Movie: Meet Joe Black.

    I haven't got my jury prizes yet but just thought I'd throw it out. I've got my reasons and (as of now) I haven't put any recent releases on, though American Beauty and Green Mile are close to pushing in.

    Scrutinize them however you wish.

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 25, 1999 1:33:22 AM CST

    2 more for you

    by duty

    forgot: "Princess Mononoke" and
    "Poke'mon first movie" but who cars about poke'mon??? My #1
    movie for the decade is "The Shawshank Redemtion"

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 27, 1999 9:27:51 AM CST

    Ahhhhhhh,

    by yossarian

    1994. What a year for cinemaphiles...-Yoss

    Reply to Talkback

  • Dec 28, 1999 5:56:32 AM CST

    Good to see Radiohead are there...

    by i'malanpartridge

    well...Grant Gee anyway...with Meeting People

    Reply to Talkback

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