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Macy's Parade: The Movie?

Nordling here.

I remember as a kid getting excited to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.  Mostly because, when I was much younger, the kids at school assured me that the "real" Santa Claus went to this parade.  All the others were fakes, even the ones in the store, but the Santa at the parade?  He was the real guy.  I often wondered what it would be like if the various floats came to life and rampaged through the city, and although I probably won't get the rampaging part, it seems I might get to see that happen in a movie.

According to Hollywood Reporter, producers Raymond Brothers and Scott Glassgold have bought the rights to develop a film based on the world-famous parade.  They are meeting with writers and creatively looking at all ideas to get the film project off the ground (pun kinda intended), including an idea where the parade floats all come to life.  They won over Macy's executives with storyboards drawn by Joel Venti (THOR, NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM: BATTLE OF THE SMITHSONIAN) and got the go ahead for the project.  "We are always searching for the next MIRACLE ON 34TH STREET," said Macy's exec Robin Hall.

Since this is geared to be a family film, the idea of giant Snoopy or giant Homer Simpson eating the New York parade-watchers probably isn't in the cards.  But maybe they'll fight through the streets of New York.  I still watch the parade every year, and I think if done with care, this film could have serious family film potential.  What do you think?

Nordling, out.

Readers Talkback
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  • March 9, 2011, 4:56 p.m. CST


    by BatRastard

    first?? no really?

  • March 9, 2011, 4:56 p.m. CST

    no not

    by BatRastard

  • March 9, 2011, 4:57 p.m. CST

    Is this Die Hard 5?

    by jim

    Or Under Siege 3?

  • March 9, 2011, 4:58 p.m. CST

    Roland Emmerich should direct

    by dopepope

    and it could be about a very windy day that wreaks havoc on the floats and destroys the entire city... and then the wolves come.

  • March 9, 2011, 4:58 p.m. CST


    by frankenfickle

    you know how long i have been waiting for a macy's parade movie? uhh, only my entire LIFE.

  • March 9, 2011, 4:59 p.m. CST

    It's been done. It's called Miracle on 34th Street.

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks


  • March 9, 2011, 4:59 p.m. CST

    Good gravy Marie

    by Mr Soze

    Terrible...just terrible

  • March 9, 2011, 5 p.m. CST

    Well that's what I get for skimming. I didn't see

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    Miracle on 34th mentioned in the post. Still, it's been done.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:02 p.m. CST

    I know it's cliche to say now

    by SithMenace

    but it really is a sad time for Hollywood. It's actually pretty depressing.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:03 p.m. CST

    Unless Smilex gas comes out of the floats, I ain't interested...

    by Shut the Fuck up Donny

  • March 9, 2011, 5:03 p.m. CST

    Being raised a Jehovah's Witness

    by SithMenace

    I was never given the Santa story. Or Christmas. Or Halloween. Or birthdays. Etc. What a sad, sad cult that is.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:05 p.m. CST

    3-D OR GTFO

    by ORIONgods

    and let michael bay direct

  • March 9, 2011, 5:06 p.m. CST

    The Macy's baloons come to life...

    by HarryKnowlesNonExistentInceptionReview

    ...and rampage across America, finally ending up in LA, where they violently slaughter idiotic, cokehead studio executives that greenlight moronic projects like Macy's Parade: The Motion Picture.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:08 p.m. CST

    By the way, though, I always watch a few minutes every year...

    by HarryKnowlesNonExistentInceptionReview

    ...It's a holiday tradition.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:08 p.m. CST

    I'm not sure why such a thing would need to be high concept...

    by Chewtoy

    Or, that is, higher concept than "Miracle on 34th Street". The parade is a pretty cool event... you could certainly do any number of tales centered around it without "Night at the Museum" style fantasy antics.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:11 p.m. CST

    I don't give these out very often, but this deserves a...

    by Dr. Egon Spengler

    Jesus Fucking Christ, are you kidding me with this?!

  • March 9, 2011, 5:12 p.m. CST

    Gimbels Thanksgiving Day Parade: The Revenge

    by WriteForTheEdit

  • March 9, 2011, 5:13 p.m. CST

    Columbus Day Parade: The Discovery

    by WriteForTheEdit

  • March 9, 2011, 5:14 p.m. CST

    This reeks of lousy Dreamworks animation

    by Mel

  • March 9, 2011, 5:14 p.m. CST

    I hear that the rights for the Gay Pride Parade are still available.

    by WriteForTheEdit

  • March 9, 2011, 5:16 p.m. CST

    And the only ones that can stop the rampaging balloons

    by sweeneydave

    are the GHOSTBUSTERS!! "Nobody steps on a department store mall in my town!" Bart Simpson explodes! Yellow cartoon flesh rains down on the city as the people rejoice!

  • March 9, 2011, 5:19 p.m. CST

    Seriously though, a woman is going to have to write this

    by sweeneydave

    because the only thing that men will come up with is GIANT RAMPAGING BALLOONS. I don't think it's possible to break past our 9-year-old-boy creativity in this scenario.

  • That is all.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:22 p.m. CST

    Fine. At least it's not a reboot of something.

    by HapaPapa72

    I hope.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:23 p.m. CST

    Of course.


  • March 9, 2011, 5:24 p.m. CST

    Seems like a lot of hot air to me

    by Andy Pandy

  • March 9, 2011, 5:24 p.m. CST

    What "rights," exactly, did they need to buy?

    by WriteForTheEdit

    I don't think "floats and inflatable characters utilized in a parade" is a concept owned by Macy's. Seems to me it's just the name of the fucking store that's copyrighted, and why would that be worth much, esp. these days?

  • March 9, 2011, 5:40 p.m. CST

    Doesn't matter if Macy's signed off on it.

    by Crooooooow

    They still can't use any of the floats without getting permission from a few dozen other peeps.

  • I'd definitely give that repeat viewings.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:40 p.m. CST

    This is how the world ends


    Not with a bang but with a fucking movie based on a parade. Seriously, aren't there any decent stories left to tell?

  • March 9, 2011, 5:47 p.m. CST

    I'm not a J-Dub anymore Ramirez

    by SithMenace

    I consider myself to be a Pantheist.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:48 p.m. CST

    We don't get GDT's At the Mountains of Madness, but we get this??!

    by Jet Jaguar

    A movie about a parade? This might be even worse than Battleship: The Movie.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:48 p.m. CST

    From the makers of Pirates XXX, cummms GAY PRIDE PARADE XXX

    by theebluewolf

  • March 9, 2011, 5:51 p.m. CST

    So they've done video games, toys, and boardgames

    by darthvedder81

    Hollywood still hasn't crossed into the final frontier: food based movies. Picture it! Pepsi: The Movie! Doritos Cool Ranch®: The Motion Picture! Taco Bell: Rise of the Chalupas! You know it's coming.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:53 p.m. CST

    Payless Shoesource 4th of July Shoe-A-Thon Parade Celebration in 3D

    by donkingkong

    catch it with the Battleship in 3D movie late night double feature.

  • March 9, 2011, 5:57 p.m. CST

    The only thing more boring than a parade

    by schadenfreudian

    is watching a parade on TV. The only thing I can think of worse than that would be paying money to sit in a theater and watch one. Jesus, we really are spiraling down the entertainment shit hole, aren't we?

  • March 9, 2011, 5:59 p.m. CST

    Did anybody else hear that booming noise?

    by Fuzzyjefe

    That was every film school in America slamming and locking their doors at the same time. "Fuck it. We're DONE."

  • March 9, 2011, 6:04 p.m. CST

    "At The Macy's Of Madness"

    by WriteForTheEdit

    There's a concept I hope they run with.

  • March 9, 2011, 6:07 p.m. CST

    "Third Floor: Housewares, Electronics, Great Old Ones... watch your step"

    by WriteForTheEdit

  • March 9, 2011, 6:13 p.m. CST

    Forget the movies- take it to Broadway!

    by Kamaji

    Make it a musical regarding a disgruntled Macy's store employee and his romance to a young woman in a wheel-chair who has loved the Thanksgiving Day Parade since she was just a little girl. And in the end, they find some common ground and end up in love while each holding a rope under the Snoopy Balloon.

  • March 9, 2011, 6:14 p.m. CST

    Ha! "At the Macy's of Madness"

    by Fuzzyjefe

    "Well looks like the Middleofnowhere Marching Band has just discovered that mankind is just a bastard offspring of unfathomably old and powerful cosmic entities. Yes...they've dropped their instruments, torn out their own eyes, and seem to be wandering aimlessly down 83rd Street."

  • March 9, 2011, 6:25 p.m. CST

    "Here comes the Innsmouth Marching Band now...

    by Fuzzyjefe

    you'll notice each instrument has been carefully crafted from human bone." "Yes they are, Matt. Notice, too, that each mouthpiece on all the wind instruments is large enough to accommodate their large, fleshy lips."

  • March 9, 2011, 6:30 p.m. CST

    Use that Flaming Lips Macy's parade song!

    by saintaugust

    "Slow Motion" by the Flaming Lips should be in this movie! In fact, get them to do the entire score.

  • March 9, 2011, 6:33 p.m. CST

    This is fucking stupid and is a slap in the face of struggling filmmakers

    by alienindisguise

    I create storyboards that run circles around Joels and I'm never given the time of day..guess to be a success in hollywood you have to be jewish or take cocks in the ass.

  • March 9, 2011, 6:40 p.m. CST

    directed by julie taymore!!!!!

    by vulturess

    balloons dont fall hard.

  • March 9, 2011, 6:52 p.m. CST

    I've already scene this and it was a great commercial

    by Brett Glatman Its a commercial Coca-Cola did with Macys a few years back. But does anyone thing that whoever makes this movie will be able to get all the license fee to use those character?

  • March 9, 2011, 6:52 p.m. CST

    Starring Harry Knowles, right? I mean...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...right? I'm tired. I'm going for the low hanging fruit.

  • March 9, 2011, 7:03 p.m. CST

    Mr. Yourahole Ramirezberg?

    by FlickaPoo


  • March 9, 2011, 7:08 p.m. CST

    Thank you writefortheedit

    by Fuzzyjefe

    but all I did was take your original idea and MAKE IT MORE AWESOMER THAN EVAH!!!! Y'know, like any good Hollywood studio suit. Now, where's my escort made out of cocaine?

  • March 9, 2011, 7:11 p.m. CST


    by Brett Glatman

    Typical cop-out from someone who doesn't have what it takes to make it.

  • March 9, 2011, 7:21 p.m. CST


    by Billy_D_Williams

    hollywood is a sad, sad place as of late...i wonder what the board meetings at these studios are like when they announce they wanna make the macy's parade movie? how can any human utter those words with a straight face?

  • March 9, 2011, 7:37 p.m. CST

    Of what the fuck...

    by JustUsNerdsHere

    ...seriously, WHAT THE FUCK?! Just 'cause Night at the Museum pulled it off doesn't mean everyone can. FTW.

  • March 9, 2011, 7:49 p.m. CST

    Starring William H. Macy as

    by Grammaton Cleric Binks

    Mr. Macy.

  • March 9, 2011, 7:56 p.m. CST

    darthvedder81, You May Have Been Joking But I Think You're Right

    by Jet Jaguar

    About the next trend in shitty moviemaking being food adaptations. I shudder to think there will come a day when the 90 minute McDonald's ad titled "Mac and Me" will be revered as being ahead of its time. Doritos: The Movie followed by Doritos: Cool Ranch followed by The Snack Food Avengers, starring Doritos, Frito-Lay, Tostitos, Rolled Gold, SunChips, and Cheetos. That said, I'd LOVE to see a movie about Cap'N Crunch, Count Chocula or the Trix Rabbit.

  • March 9, 2011, 8:22 p.m. CST

    They must really be out of ideas.

    by Yelsaeb

  • March 9, 2011, 8:26 p.m. CST

    Seriously... What is next?

    by GroolDemon

    Mardi Gras: The Movie? Pittsburgh Regatta The Movie? Bicentennial: The Movie? Opening the Time Capsule at UCLA: The Movie? New York Harbor 4th of July Fireworks Show: The Movie? Christmas Day Opening Prezzies: The Movie? Waiting in Line at the BMV: The Movie? Detroit Auto Show: The Movie? Rose Bowl Parade: The Movie? Cleveland Wooly Bear Fest: The Movie? Boston Marathon: The Movie?... Jesus, I mean have these fuckers really run so dry on original ideas that they've reached this low of a fucking point? I swear, at this rate, in a few years we'll be watching actors reading us the goddamned phone book in eye searing 4D!!!! It'll be a fucking tour de force performance of names and numbers I tell ya! Forget eye fuckery it'll be optical paper cuts!

  • March 9, 2011, 8:32 p.m. CST

    Only two options...

    by Andrew Coleman

    Floats come alive and start murdering people and destroying the city. Or terrorists attack the parade. If it's anything else the film is pointless.

  • March 9, 2011, 8:48 p.m. CST

    I cant wait for the sequel-The Great Turkey Sleep...

    by Jobacca

    The tryptophan takes effect in 30 minutes!!!! We're running out of time!!!!! How will we ever stay awake long enough for the Rose Bowl Game??? Stay Tuned! Maybe if it does well enough we'll get a trilogy with BLACK FRIDAY-When tainted turkey turns a horde of holiday shoppers into a ravenous flock of zombies,only Santa and The Best Buy Geek Squad can save the day,'Cause the only thing more tempting than human flesh is 40% off on electronics!!!!

  • March 9, 2011, 8:55 p.m. CST

    how the fuck do you make storyboards before there is a story??

    by golden tribw

    Seriously, what the FUCK could POSSIBLY be in these storyboards if they don't know what the goddamn plot is? Without a writer telling you what happens, what the hell do you draw? This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

  • March 9, 2011, 9:10 p.m. CST

    I think we're starting to get to a point where...

    by Lobanhaki2

    ...the real question is whether the brand names are really going to add any real interest to the films, or whether they'd just be better off making a generic good movie along whatever plot line they develop and just do product placement in the right places. I think it pays more to be generally correct about what an audience wants than precisely wrong.

  • March 9, 2011, 9:10 p.m. CST

    Dingleberry: The Movie

    by KonkBob

  • March 9, 2011, 9:15 p.m. CST

    it's official

    by godhelpus

    hollywood has officially run out of ideas.

  • March 9, 2011, 9:22 p.m. CST

    I highly doubt you will see the Snoopy character...

    by tritium

    unless they separately get a license agreement with the Schult'z estate. And if they do, Charles (may he rest in peace) will assuredly spin in his grave. And so will Bill Melendez. And so will Vince Guaraldi. Friggin' sacriledge, I say! Don't mess with Snoopy.

  • March 9, 2011, 9:30 p.m. CST

    Floats coming to life...

    by darth_hideous

    ...requires magic. What kind of magic are we talking about here? Santa's magical powers? Nicolas Cage? Is this going to conjure images of Burton's BATMAN?

  • March 9, 2011, 9:30 p.m. CST

    Well...the balloons have been known to maim and kill people...

    by Jobacca

    Could make an interesting horror movie,at least.

  • March 9, 2011, 9:43 p.m. CST

    It's "been official" about 986 times in the last decade

    by Larry Sellers

    that Hollywood has run out of ideas. At this point it's pretty much just like watching the aftermath of a car accident...probably the least interesting car accident ever. There would be NO trouble in getting this financed since it's pretty much just one big parade of name brands and characters.

  • March 9, 2011, 9:59 p.m. CST

    Remember This Coke Commercial?

    by filegumbo The balloons almost come to life and are trumped in their battle for a Coke by the granddaddy of all balloons...Charlie Brown!

  • I'd only watch a movie about a parade if it was directed by Christopher Guest and about the behind the scenes of a small town parade a-la "Waiting for Guffman."

  • March 9, 2011, 10:05 p.m. CST

    This project needs Charlie Sheen!

    by chewyou812

  • March 9, 2011, 10:44 p.m. CST

    I hope to go blind and deaf before this happens.

    by Bob Cryptonight

    Fuck Raymond Brothers and Scott Glassgold.

  • March 9, 2011, 11:41 p.m. CST


    by zillabeast


  • March 10, 2011, 12:28 a.m. CST

    Coming soon - a movie based on Windex window cleaning fluid

    by Happyfat73

  • March 10, 2011, 12:32 a.m. CST

    Coming soon... bottled water: the movie

    by Happyfat73

  • March 10, 2011, 12:46 a.m. CST

    Battle:LA is getting HORRID reviews :(

    by LegendarySpartanBlood

  • March 10, 2011, 12:47 a.m. CST

    FUCK! i had high hopes for that fucking movie

    by LegendarySpartanBlood

  • March 10, 2011, 1:30 a.m. CST

    Nordling, who wants a "serious family film?"

    by Somerichs

    I mean really... :)

  • March 10, 2011, 1:44 a.m. CST

    If this is the next trend, then I'm gonna write Orkin

    by lv_426

    O R K I N The Movie Based on those Orkin commercials featuring the cybernetic Orkin man killing bugs with laser guns. Although I suppose writing a script is a lot of wasted effort. I'll just kidnap an artist to create some storyboards for my big pitch to the suits. I bet Universal will buy it.

  • March 10, 2011, 1:51 a.m. CST


    by lv_426

    Yes. That's it. I will be so rich that I will be able to hire Charlie Sheen and Warwick Davis to be butlers at my mega-mansion.

  • March 10, 2011, 2:11 a.m. CST

    But on a serious note...

    by lv_426

    ... yep. Hollywood is now officially creatively dead. Why would any sane writer, director, or actor starting out now or entering film school even try to break in to the mainstream film industry? I suppose if you can come up with an idea like this Macy's Parade bullshit. Something you could cash in on. Otherwise, I think filmmakers that have a creative need and passion to tell original stories must go the independent route. Even if you want to do larger budget films, then it looks like the route Blomkamp took with District 9 is the only way to go. Either that, or go the Monsters route if you can pull it off, doing all the effects yourself or with the assistance of a small but dedicated effects team. At this rate, if "At the Mountains of Madness" can't get going with Del Toro and Jim Cameron at the helm, what makes anyone else think that the studios and entrenched production companies will give talented and dedicated up and coming filmmakers the time of day? Fuck me. This is seriously depressing.

  • March 10, 2011, 2:32 a.m. CST

    world famous?

    by mrbong

    what the fuck is it, please?

  • March 10, 2011, 3:14 a.m. CST

    Hey wait

    by Shubniggorath

    Didn't a TB'er refer to Turn Off the Dark as a Macy's parade on stage?

  • and as a kid, you fucking bought it. God damn, that's the most fucked up thing I've read this year, I think.

  • March 10, 2011, 3:18 a.m. CST

    @mr bong : The Macy's Thanksgiving parade is...

    by V'Shael

    a parade of sometimes amusing, sometimes ridiculous floats and inflated balloons, which winds its way along Broadway, Times Square and up to Macy's store. The whole event marks the "arrival" of the Macy's store Santa Claus. I went to see it once. Aside from noting some incredibly rude parents at the side of the road watching the spectacle, the only decent thing was when various cheerleading and marching squads and other young nubile hotties did some dance moves to music. It's free to watch on the street, it's broadcast on television, and is a complete waste of time, space, and energy.

  • March 10, 2011, 4:46 a.m. CST

    People With "Options" Leave...

    by Tassium

    ...Any organisation when the working conditions become poor. For "options" read talent. So the organisation is left with the 2nd-raters while the talent goes into cable TV or buys a yacht.

  • March 10, 2011, 4:57 a.m. CST

    jesus wept

    by kwisatzhaderach

  • March 10, 2011, 4:58 a.m. CST

    Giant Snoopy gotta eat

    by The Dwayne

    Had to be said.

  • March 10, 2011, 5:07 a.m. CST

    v'shael - cheers fella

    by mrbong

    oh right, is that what it is? i mean, i have seen it on the odd TV show or film, was unaware that it had an official name or something like that.

  • March 10, 2011, 5:16 a.m. CST

    Floats come to life just in time...

    by buggerbugger stave off the latest alien invasion.

  • March 10, 2011, 6:28 a.m. CST

    Coming Soon: Your Mother - The Movie.

    by tomdolan04

  • March 10, 2011, 6:31 a.m. CST

    Make it a Broadway Musical

    by tomdolan04

    Have the actors continually fall off their floats causing serious injury, write a crappy aimless script with nothing to do with the source matieral, feck it over in Preview Hell indefinitely = Box office gold it seems these days.

  • March 10, 2011, 7:07 a.m. CST

    Coming to theatres in 2014.....

    by GM1976

    Watching Paint Dry: The Movie

  • March 10, 2011, 8:25 a.m. CST

    What about an origin story...

    by DJB

    From Wikipedia In the 1920s many of Macy's department store employees were first-generation immigrants. Proud of their new American heritage, they wanted to celebrate the United States holiday of Thanksgiving with the type of festival their parents had loved in Europe.[1] In 1924, the inaugural parade (originally known as the Macy's Christmas Parade and later the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Christmas Parade.[2]) was staged by the store. Employees and professional entertainers marched from 145th Street in Harlem to Macy's flagship store on 34th Street dressed in vibrant costumes.[3] There were floats, professional bands and live animals borrowed from the Central Park Zoo.[4] At the end of that first parade, as has been the case with every parade since, Santa Claus was welcomed into Herald Square. At this first parade, however, the Jolly Old Elf was enthroned on the Macy's balcony at the 34th Street store entrance, where he was then "crowned" "King of the Kiddies."[5] With an audience of over a quarter of a million people,[citation needed] the parade was such a success that Macy's declared it would become an annual event. Large animal-shaped balloons, produced by the Goodyear Tire and Rubber Company in Akron, Ohio, replaced the live animals in 1927 when the Felix the Cat balloon made its debut. Felix was filled with air, but by the next year, helium was used to fill the expanding cast of balloons. At the finale of the 1928 parade, the balloons were released into the sky where they unexpectedly burst. The following year they were redesigned with safety valves to allow them to float for a few days. [1] Address labels were sewn into them, so that whoever found and mailed back the discarded balloon received a gift from Macy's [2] Through the 1930s, the Parade continued to grow, with crowds of over 1 million lining the parade route in 1933. The first Mickey Mouse balloon entered the parade in 1934. The annual festivities were broadcast on local New York radio from 1932 through 1941,[6] and resumed in 1945 through 1951.[7] The parade was suspended 1942–1944 during World War II, owing to the need for rubber and helium in the war effort.[8][9] The parade resumed in 1945 using the route that it followed until 2008 (see below). The parade became a permanent part of American culture after being prominently featured in the 1947 film, Miracle on 34th Street, which shows actual footage of the 1946 festivities. The event was first broadcast on network television in 1948 (see below). By this point the event, and Macy's sponsorship of it, were sufficiently well-known to give rise to the colloquialism "Macy's Day Parade". New safety measures were incorporated in 2006 to prevent accidents and balloon related injuries. One measure taken was installation of wind measurement devices to alert parade organizers to any unsafe conditions that could cause the balloons to behave erratically. Also, parade officials implemented a measure to keep the balloons closer to the ground during windy conditions. ...I'd watch that.

  • March 10, 2011, 8:36 a.m. CST

    Gay Pride Parade: The Movie...directed by Gus Van Sant

    by Bobo_Vision

    Starring Brandon Routh.

  • March 10, 2011, 9:30 a.m. CST

    The Long Parade -- by Stephen King

    by Green

    Participants in the Parade have to keep walking and waving or else they're shot. I'd pay money for that.

  • March 10, 2011, 9:46 a.m. CST

    Simpsons did it!

    by kongoman

  • BULLSHIT! Typical Aintitcool typist bullshit trying to act like they're ideas are the same as the shitty ones that sell in Hollywood. Bet you also wondered what it would be like to bend reality in a computer before Matrix - or to take a Delorean back in time - just shut your mouth and report - leave your made up shitty life out of it.

  • March 10, 2011, 10:06 a.m. CST

    the damn parade is in 3D, the movie better be too

    by Japan Flix

  • March 10, 2011, 11:08 a.m. CST


    by Smitty


  • March 10, 2011, 11:09 a.m. CST

    What a rights nightmare

    by MrDexter

    it'll never happen

  • March 10, 2011, 11:12 a.m. CST


    by wampa_one

    this isn't their way of doing a Thanksgiving version of Love Actually or Valentine's Day? Sorry, no thanks!

  • March 10, 2011, 11:23 a.m. CST

    Giant balloons coming to life?

    by toxictodd

    sounds cool 2 me

  • March 10, 2011, 11:33 a.m. CST

    Wasn't that the first 20 minutes of Miracle on 34th Street?

    by Coughlins Laws

    This better be set in the early days of this. Actually, what am I saying. How can they spread this out for two hours. Is the parade itself even 2 hours long? I'm bored just typing 3 sentences about it. What are they thinking? I think they think average people are somehow enamored with behind the scenes stories of "showbiz magic"...

  • March 10, 2011, 11:49 a.m. CST

    It should be about the floats tired of all the

    by sweeneydave

    marching bands, broadway musical segments, and equestrians that have been slowly taking over the parade. And now it's time to take it back from them.

  • March 10, 2011, 12:49 p.m. CST

    Fave Scene: Jack Black being pulled up into the sky.

    by venvariants

    Yes, that's right. Hilarity ensues with Jack Black as the newbie rope-holder who inadvertently fucks everything up and causes one of the balloons (likely Garfield or Underdog) to go flying off above the skyline. Midget-or-retarded-kid elves let go and fall to the ground, but ol' Jack Black, that nut, he holds on out of sheer integrity and pluck. Fuck up or not, everybody learns to forgive him when he comes safely back down - and learns a thing or two about the real meaning of Christmas.

  • Shit... well tell me when there's a 'Maybelline: The Movie' where a woman goes on an epic adventure to discover whether she was born with it, or if it was just the stupid fucking product all along!!!! Guess how that one ends!!!

  • March 10, 2011, 1:36 p.m. CST

    This could be the Roger Rabbit of giant parade balloon movies!!

    by Jobacca

    Think about it...the Garfield and Kung Fu Panda Ballons teaming up to eat some lasgna and battle Mondays! Underdog and Snoopy teaming up to prove they're still relevent to the kids of today! The Spongebob and Shrek ballons teaming up to anally violate Pikachu high above 5th Ave. This could be a classic loved by dozens of retarded children for weeks to come!!! How has it taken Hollywwod THIS LONG to make this movie??? I only hope its in 3D so I can pay twice as much and actually FEEL the helium-filled latex all around me....

  • March 10, 2011, 1:37 p.m. CST


    by Jobacca

    Fucking lack of edit button...BALLOONS!!!

  • March 10, 2011, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Brendan Fraser's gotta eat

    by Cobb05

    You know he's going to star in this piece of crap. Unless the balloons come to life and start destroying the city like Godzilla, there's no way a movie about the parade will be good. What's next Yule Log: the movie?

  • March 10, 2011, 2:44 p.m. CST

    WONDER BREAD: The Movie

    by lv_426

    Some loaves are magical.

  • March 10, 2011, 2:45 p.m. CST

    BOSTON MARKET: Chicken and Tea

    by lv_426

    The origin story of the conspiracy involving the Boston Market secret rotisserie formula, and the British double agent willing to kill for it. All of this unfolds during the Boston Tea Party. Cameos for Sarah Palin and Rand Paul.

  • March 10, 2011, 3:12 p.m. CST

    Here's an idea

    by fozzy360

    Make it a parody of found-footage movies where we watching from the perspective of a family who tried to document their family vacation and instead have captured on their cam the adorable aftermath of the floats coming to life. There have been worse ideas.

  • March 11, 2011, 1:51 p.m. CST

    A full on gore fest would be much better

    by Mike

    Also I like the idea of crossing this over with Die Hard or another franchise. Just imagine McClane has another headache so he's really angry and then he has to deal with a giant evil Spongebob (you know how evil his parade float is if you've seen The Weatherman)! "Spend time with the kids, see the parade..."

  • March 12, 2011, 7:29 a.m. CST

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