I am – Hercules!!
Tonight happily brings what I believe is the last of the new fall network scripted series. The pilot for “Law & Order: Los Angeles” was scripted by Blake Masters, who masterminded Showtime’s excellent “Brotherhood.” Joining subsequent to the cancellation of the original “Law & Order” is longtime “Law & Order” writer-producer Rene Balcer. The new show is nothing like “Brotherhood” and exactly what its title promises: an L.A. “Law & Order” with a new set of detectives and prosecutors who behave very much the same way their counterparts did back in New York. There’s a lot of overburdened expositional chit-chat I associate with the cancelled series, like “Mom shoots a burglar. Daughter holds a press conference. I love L.A.” The West Coast version stars Skeet Ulrich (“Jericho”), Corey Stoll (“The Number 23”), Alfred Molina (“Raiders of the Lost Ark”), Regina Hall (the “Scary Movie” series), Rachel Ticotin (the “Traveling Pants” movies), Peter Coyote (“The 4400”), Terrence Howard (“Iron Man”), Megan Boone (“Sex and the City 2”) and Teri Polo (“The West Wing”). Some of the cast rotates in and out, and Howard, Boone, Coyote and Polo don’t turn up in the first episode. The bald and mustachioed Stoll stands out among all the “where were you on the night of the attack?” questioning and more famous actors. Lindsay and Dina Lohan are so obviously the inspiration for episode one that virtually every critic is obliged to mention the troubled mother-daughter team by name. TMZ is referenced so many times in the first episode you half-expect to see Harvey Levin listed as one of the producers. Next week’s installment focuses on a Manson-y cult, so I guess this series can do stories torn from the headlines of 1969. If you were still watching “Law & Order” when NBC cancelled it, I doubt you’ll find anything offensive here. If you weren’t a fan, I can’t imagine this will make you one. USA Today says:

… Where SVU and Criminal Intent spun off in their own slightly different directions, LA mostly clings fast to the bifurcated, plot-driven structure of the original. … What you get from LA is a show that's as solid and reliable as a well-built sedan. …

The New York Times says:

… not a sequel to the original series, which was canceled last May after 20 years, but it is a worthy heir. … keeps the focus on the criminals. And in this case, at least, crime may pay.

The Los Angeles Times says:

… The current series has fresh air to breathe and new names to drop — Chin Chin, Caltech, Hillcrest, the Edison — and apparently plans to make a meal out of Hollywood. But it hits the traditional notes square on, moving fast in brief scenes and bursts of exposition, and splitting the difference between melodrama and naturalism. …

The Washington Post says:

… instantly registers as sunnier and sexier, but old-school viewers will feel safe and secure. …

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette says:

… At one point in tonight's episode, a paparazzi photographer spells out the theme of the episode and potentially future episodes given the show's setting: "The public loves to watch stars suffer like regular people." That kind of self-aware Schadenfreude may play well in an episode or two but would probably grow old if "LOLA" focused only on fictional celebrities. So the need to branch out to non-Hollywood stories is as understandable as the attempt next week is regrettable. …

The San Francsico Chronicle says:

… "L&O" - pick one, it doesn't really matter - traffics in familiarity and ease of understanding. It's the law-and-justice series for people who don't want to be bothered with complications. Have a crime, find some suspects, catch the perps, have them prosecuted and see you next week. Nuance is frowned upon. Dense storytelling brushed aside. It's a series that allows your brain to go into neutral with the knowledge that everything will be tidy by the 59-minute mark. It is completely unsurprising, then, that "LOLA" would come out of the box so predictable and unchallenging. … your time will be better spent with either ABC's "Detroit 1-8-7" or CBS' "Blue Bloods." Neither is great. They don't even break new ground. But they try harder. And they're more entertaining. And they at least pretend to be art, not machinery.

HitFix says:

… Right now, it’s a work in progress at best. … Both cops are fairly bland, though the Hollywood setting of the first episode at least gives Stoll a few good lines. … the attempt to establish the show’s LA bonafides are, frankly, overkill. I know it’s a no-win situation, since everyone wanted to see how the show could exist outside New York, but by the time we get several scenes in a row discussing the TMZ tip line, it’s just too much. … NBC’s hope has to be that the new city is enough to rekindle interest … And I’m not sure it is. … If audiences already had their fill of the original format with one of its better casts, the change of scenery alone likely isn’t going to make everything seem new again. It’s “Law & Order,” no matter the coast. There are cops, there are killers, there are lawyers. These are their stories.

TV Squad says:

… The case in the 'LOLA' premiere isn't particularly impressive, though it demonstrates the competence and consistency that has allowed the 'L&O' brand to last for two decades. … There's life left in this relocated franchise, as long as 'LOLA' doesn't become too enamored of the fame game.

The Boston Herald says:

… stuffy … Visually, “Los Angeles” works. One forgets how dark and claustrophobic the New York shows can be. The sets seem more open, and the decor reflects an electric mix of modern styles. But the crimes - ripped from the headlines, naturally - might as well be culled from the funny pages. … as gripping as dandruff. … Final verdict: Visit if you want, but there’s no compelling reason to relocate your viewing habits to this show. …

The Boston Globe says:

… Sorry, but there’s something blasphemous about this whole idea. “Law & Order’’ has been a definitively New York franchise for two decades, and moving the ching-ching-a-thon to the West Coast is just too weird. …

The Hollywood Reporter says:

… the first episode comes across as too busy and unformed, with bland, friction-free detectives … Fortunately, the pace picks up considerably once the show slips into its legal second half … the series takes a truly unfortunate turn when it follows the villains around, giving away the whodunit and scattering the tension to the Santa Ana winds. It's an ordinary, dull device employed by most cop shows and is in part responsible for the sinking of "Criminal Intent," so it's hard to imagine the logic in employing it here. … it still should be doing some slashing and burning -- and a lot less spewing of lines like: "Mom shoots a burglar, daughter holds a press conference. I love L.A." The last thing this series wants to do is blend in -- and thus far, it's no standout.

Variety says:

… slick and sleazy -- capitalizing on its locale with all the requisite L.A. stereotypes, while featuring a potent cast that, as usual, is pretty shackled by the well-established format. … The writers do indulge in a few amusing L.A.-centric detours -- including a pointed scene of "reality TV" being filmed, complete with retakes -- but there's ultimately no escaping the mostly unchanged (and undeniably durable) formula. …

10 p.m. Wednesday. NBC. Follow Herc on Twitter!! Follow Evil Herc on Twitter!! “Mr. Show: The Complete Series,” $47.49 last week, is momentarily $20.99!! (58% Off!!)

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