I am – Hercules!!
Neither “The Jay Leno Show” nor “The Tonight Show With Jay Leno” was nominated for a “best varity, music or comedy series” Emmy this year.
Leno’s “Tonight,” in fact, hasn’t been nominated in the category since 2003.
But the short-lived “Tonight Show With Conan O’Brien” (in my view the best incarnation of “The Tonight Show” ever) garnered an Emmy nomination in that category for its first and only season.
Will the TV academy give Jay Leno and Dick Ebersol and Jeff Zucker a big “fuck you” tonight by handing Coco the pretty statuette over NBC’s airwaves?
Conan’s replacement at “Late Night,” Jimmy Fallon, hosts the Emmy ceremonies tonight. Fallon says he knows Conan will attend, but is less certain about Leno.
Either “Modern Family” or “Glee” is expected to win the “outstanding comedy” Emmy tonight, but Los Angeles TV critic Robert Lloyd is left scratching his head :
… they are not beloved by me. I don't say this to be contrary or controversial. If anything, I'm in a state of wonderment. It feels odd, critically, to remain so unmoved by things that have moved so many, to be left cold by what warms the multitudes. Do I think that people who like these shows are wrong? I suppose in some way I must, just as I imagine that they would pity my inability to enjoy them, as though I were unable to appreciate the taste of strawberries or the smell of cut grass. … "Modern Family" does not work on me at all. It's as if we existed on different planes, or came from different planets, or that I suffered from some sort of neurological deficit that denatured every joke and feel-good moment.
I’m with Lloyd. The fact that “Glee” and “Modern Family” got nominated over “South Park,” “The Venture Bros.,” "Community," "Parks and Recreation," “Weeds,” “The Sarah Silverman Program” and “The Life and Times of Tim” elicits the same shrugging of Herculean shoulders that greeted the nomination of “Desperate Housewives” as best comedy over “The Office” all those years ago.
NBC.com is for the first time hosting live streaming video from the event’s backstage areas, so that might be interesting.
Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fey, Kate Gosselin, Joel McHale, Jorge Garcia, John Hamm and a girl I do not recognize get sucked into the best episode of "Glee" ever!
Fallon looks like he's going to pass out. Any Poehler helps him salute the apparently bad) year in comedy.
Jon Hamm and Betty White joke about how horny they are, then present:
BEST SUPPORTING COMEDY ACTOR
Chris Colfer ("Glee")
Neil Patrick Harris ("How I Met Your Mother")
Jesse Tyler Ferguson ("Modern Family")
Eric Stonestreet ("Modern Family")
Ty Burrell ("Modern Family")
Jon Cryer ("Two and a Half Men")
Eric Stonestreet plays the fat gay.
Hodgeman is back as the color commentator and is now Fallon's enemy.
Jim Parsons and Sofia Vergara present. The writers made little films. Some funnier than others!
BEST WRITING FOR A COMEDY SERIES
"Glee" (FOX)
"Modern Family" (ABC)
"The Office" (NBC)
"30 Rock" (NBC)
"30 Rock" (NBC)
Stephen Colbert calls to Tom Hanks and presents:
BEST SUPPORTING COMEDY ACTRESS
Jane Lynch ("Glee")
Julie Bowen ("Modern Family")
Sofia Vergara ("Modern Family")
Kristen Wiig ("Saturday Night Live")
Jane Krakowski ("30 Rock")
Holland Taylor ("Two and a Half Men")
Jane calls writer-director Ryan Murphy ("Popular," "Nip/Tuck," "Glee," "Eat Pray Love") her "lord and creator."
"Oh, so another gay guy!" We're reminded Betty White ("SNL") and Neil Patrick Harris ("Glee") won Schmemmies. Matthew Perry and Lauren Graham then present:
BEST DIRECTING FOR A COMEDY SERIES
"Glee" (FOX)
"Glee" (FOX)
"Modern Family" (ABC)
"Nurse Jackie" (Showtime)
"30 Rock" (NBC)
"Glee is about the importance of arts education."
I still enjoy staring at Lauren Graham.
George Clooney is pitched for the cast of "Modern Family."
Eva Longoria and LL Cool J present:
BEST COMEDY ACTOR
Jim Parsons ("The Big Bang Theory")
Larry David ("Curb Your Enthusiasm")
Matthew Morrison ("Glee")
Tony Shalhoub ("Monk")
Steve Carell ("The Office")
Alec Baldwin ("30 Rock")
It's official: Jim Parsons funnier than Larry David, Steve Carell and Alec Baldwin. (Things not looking good for "30 Rock" this year!)
Neil Patrick Harris mocks Jimmy Fallon's gaity and presents:
BEST COMEDY ACTRESS
Lea Michele ("Glee")
Julia Louis-Dreyfus ("The New Adventures of Old Christine")
Edie Falco ("Nurse Jackie")
Amy Poehler ("Parks and Recreation")
Tina Fey ("30 Rock")
Toni Collette ("United States of Tara")
"I am NOT funny," explains Falco. But the Emmys say she's funnier than Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.
Fallon and Kardashian introduce a "reality" package that proves perhaps marginally funnier than the "comedy" package. Nice to see "Big Brother's" latest Brittany in there.
Will Arnett and Keri Russell present
BEST REALITY-COMPETITION PROGRAM
"The Amazing Race" (CBS)
"American Idol" (FOX)
"Dancing With the Stars" (ABC)
"Project Runway" (Lifetime)
"Top Chef" (Bravo)
"Amazing Race" goes home empty for a change.
Juliana M helps into the "drama" package.
Chris Meloni and Mariska Hargitay, who teamed up save NBC's 10 p.m. slot, talk about cancer, then present
BEST WRITING FOR A DRAMA SERIES
"Friday Night Lights" (DirecTV)
"The Good Wife" (CBS)
"Lost" (ABC)
"Mad Men" (AMC)
"Mad Men" (AMC)
Matt Weiner again accepts a writing Emmy with a hot female writer. This year: Erin Levy!
BEST SUPPORTING DRAMA ACTOR
Aaron Paul ("Breaking Bad")
Martin Short ("Damages")
Terry O'Quinn ("Lost")
Michael Emerson ("Lost")
John Slattery ("Mad Men")
Andre Braugher ("Men of a Certain Age")
Tough shit, Short, O'Quinn, Emerson, Slattery and Braugher! Paul is easily the hottest and youngest of the six nominees!
Emily Deschanel and Nathan Fillion present:
BEST SUPPORTING DRAMA ACTRESS
Sharon Gless ("Burn Notice")
Rose Byrne ("Damages")
Archie Panjabi ("The Good Wife")
Christine Baranski ("The Good Wife")
Christina Hendricks ("Mad Men")
Elisabeth Moss ("Mad Men")
Shoulda been Hendricks, Moss or Byrne.
Not-funny Edie Falco presents:
BEST DRAMA ACTOR
Bryan Cranston ("Breaking Bad")
Michael C. Hall ("Dexter")
Kyle Chandler ("Friday Night Lights")
Hugh Laurie ("House")
Matthew Fox ("Lost")
Jon Hamm ("Mad Men")
"I love you more than baseball." Plus shout outs to non-nominees Jonathan Banks, Giancarlo Esposito and Bob Odenkirk. I've no issue with this win. Congratualations, Bryan Cranston.
The stars of J.J. Abrams' "Undercovers" use their real accents to remind us John Lithgow and Ann Margaret won Schmemmies. (How great is that "Damages" title theme, by the way?)
Lithgow and Margaret then present:
BEST DIRECTING FOR A DRAMA SERIES
"Breaking Bad” (AMC)
"Dexter" (Showtime)
"Lost" (ABC)
"Mad Men" (AMC)
"Treme" (HBO)
Fallon says farewell to "24," "Law & Order," and "Lost." A highlight of tonight's show, I say.
"They are terrifying. Beautiful." Matthew Morrison and Tina Fey present:
BEST DRAMA ACTRESS
Kyra Sedgwick ("The Closer")
Glenn Close ("Damages")
Connie Britton ("Friday Night Lights")
Julianna Margulies ("The Good Wife")
Mariska Hargitay ("Law & Order: Special Victims Unit")
January Jones ("Mad Men")
Kyra's first Emmy. Fey: "At least I get to hold one tonight." I love Tina Fey. They should give her her own show.
Colbert helps with the "variety" clip package.
Joel McHale and Jeff Probst present:
BEST WRITING FOR A VARIETY, MUSIC OR COMEDY SPECIAL
82nd Annual Academy Awards (ABC)
"Bill Maher ... But I'm Not Wrong" (HBO)
The Kennedy Center Honors (CBS)
63rd Annual Tony Awards (CBS)
"Wanda Sykes: I'ma Be Me" (HBO)
Steve Martin's line about the Jews in the Oscar clip is the funniest tonight.
"Let's just say for coffee." Funny Infinity/Community commercial.
Ricky Gervais, doing Howie Mandel's act with a funny accent again, serves beer and presents:
BEST DIRECTING FOR A VARIETY, MUSIC OR COMEDY SPECIAL
"In Performance at the White House: A Celebration of Music From the Civil Rights Movement" (PBS)
The Kennedy Center Honors (CBS)
63rd Annual Tony Awards (CBS)
The 25th Anniversary Rock And Roll Hall of Fame Concert (HBO)
Vancouver 2010 Olympic Winter Games Opening Ceremony (NBC)
Ah, the Olumpics won in the directing category. For the record, Dick Ebersol (who did not direct the Olympics) can fuck himself. Fuck you, Dick Ebersol. And good job, NBC, for keeping Dick Ebersol on the payroll.
BEST VARIETY, MUSIC, OR COMEDY SERIES
"The Colbert Report" (Comedy Central)
"The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" (Comedy Central)
"Real Time With Bill Maher" (HBO)
"Saturday Night Live" (NBC)
"The Tonight Show With Conan O'Brien" (NBC)
Oh! Not enough love for Conan! Well, congrats to Jon & Co., who mount an amazing show.
Juliana Marguiles hands George Clooney the Bob Hope humanitarian award. So that kinda rocks.
Hanks helps with the movies/miniseries package. Perhaps involuntarily!
"It's right there!" January Jones and John Krasinski present:
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Kathy Bates ("Alice")
Julia Ormond ("Temple Grandin")
Catherine O'Hara ("Temple Grandin")
Brenda Vaccaro ("You Don't Know Jack")
Susan Sarandon ("You Don't Know Jack")
Hodgson says he was born to play Sabrina. Funny.
Claire Danes (Angela Chase) presents:
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Michael Gambon ("Emma")
Patrick Stewart ("Hamlet")
Jonathan Pryce ("Return To Cranford")
David Strathairn ("Temple Grandin")
John Goodman ("You Don't Know Jack")
The real Temple Grandin! Cool!
Dead:
Art Linklater
Fess Parker
Jimmy Deam
Art Clockey
Gene Barry
Roy Disney
Soupy Sales
Jean Simmons!
Peter Graves!
Robert Culp!
Caroline McWilliams!
Merlin Olsen
Pernell Roberts
Patricia Neal!
Maury Chaykin!
Corey Haim!
Edward Woodward
James Gammon
Gary Coleman
John Forsythe
Rue McClanahan
Phil Harris
Dixie Carter
Lynn Redgrave
Lena Horne!
Dennis Hopper!
Wow, I totally missed that Maury Chaykin died! That guy ruled!! WarGames!! Dances With Wolves!! He died about a month ago! Where was I?
Maura Tierney and Blair Underwood present:
BEST WRITING FOR A MINISERIES, MOVIE OR DRAMATIC SPECIAL
"The Pacific" (HBO)
"The Pacific" (HBO)
"The Special Relationship" (HBO)
"Temple Grandin" (HBO)
"You Don't Know Jack" (HBO)
BEST LEAD ACTRESS IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Maggie Smith ("Capturing Mary")
Joan Allen ("Georgia O'Keeffe")
Judi Dench ("Return to Cranford")
Hope Davis ("The Special Relationship")
Claire Danes ("Temple Grandin")
Danes WAS crazy great in this.
Anna, Stephen and Alexader from "True Blood" use their real accents to present:
BEST DIRECTING FOR A MINISERIES, MOVIE OR DRAMATIC SPECIAL
"Georgia O'Keeffe" (Lifetime)
"The Pacific" (HBO)
"The Pacific" (HBO)
"Temple Grandin" (HBO)
"You Don't Know Jack" (HBO)
So have a look at "Temple Grandin" already, you swine.
BEST LEAD ACTOR IN A MINISERIES OR MOVIE
Jeff Bridges ("A Dog Year")
Ian McKellen ("The Prisoner")
Michael Sheen ("The Special Relationship")
Dennis Quaid ("The Special Relationship")
Al Pacino ("You Don't Know Jack")
You're out of order!! You're out of order!! This guy used to guard his father's hospital alongside Enzo the baker!! Plus Kervorkian got tickets!
By the way, "The Event" is still the best fall pilot I've seen this year.
Lawrence Fishburne presents:
BEST MINISERIES
"The Pacific" (HBO)
"Return to Cranford" (PBS)
Hanks says the thank-yous! Fuck you, Dick Ebersol!
BEST TV MOVIE
"Endgame" (PBS)
"Georgia O'Keeffe" (Lifetime)
"Moonshot" (HISTORY)
"The Special Relationship" (HBO)
"Temple Grandin"(HBO)
"You Don't Know Jack" (HBO)
ibid.
Only the two big ones are left! Very exciting!
Jimmy hugs Tom Selleck! Funny!
Selleck presents:
BEST DRAMA SERIES
"Breaking Bad" (AMC)
"Dexter" (Showtime)
"The Good Wife" (CBS)
"Lost" (ABC)
"Mad Men" (AMC)
"True Blood" (HBO)
Yeah it is! Gonna watch it right now! Fuck you, Dick Ebersol!
Ted Danson, star of one of the four best sitcoms ever, presents:
BEST COMEDY SERIES
"Curb Your Enthusiasm" (HBO)
"Glee" (FOX)
"Modern Family" (ABC)
"Nurse Jackie" (Showtime)
"The Office" (NBC)
"30 Rock" (NBC)
Smell you later!
8 p.m. ET / 5 p.m. PT. Sunday. NBC.
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