Review

If Harry were in High School & PIRANHA 3D were on HBO... I woulda ruined alot of socks to this

Published at: Aug. 20, 2010, 3:36 a.m. CST

I was going to sleep, then write this up tomorrow (aka later today) but dammit... I can't quite sleep just yet, the brain is slightly revved from a double bill of completely radically different horror films whose only connecting thread is Eli Roth. I'll write about THE LAST EXORCISM tomorrow, the film he produced... Tonight... right now, I'm here to write about how Eli Roth followed up his SAG AWARD WINNING ENSEMBLE performance in INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS - to play a man judging a wet t-shirt contest in PIRANHA 3D. Ya know... I can't argue with how he abused his new found cred. I think spending a day or two surrounded by crazy fit naked or bikini wearing babes... while you get to spray them down... Laurence Olivier never had that chance? What about Alec Guinness? Nope. In fact, I'm not sure of my facts... but Eli might be the first SAG award winning actor to play a Wet T-Shirt Contest Judge... And ya know what. I believed it. I believed he was wetting down those T-Shirts - because I saw how the white material just melted away to reveal a shit ton of fake boobies with pert nipples. Maybe 30 girls. Just in the contest - not counting the HUNDREDS in Bikinis on all sides of the frame, no matter where the camera turned... be it in a helicopter, underwater, on a crane, in a speedboat... there were tits to be judged by us the audience members watching this film. Directed by the crazy French bastard behind HAUTE TENSION, which I love... and when you think of his HILLS HAVE EYES remake and that MIRRORS film... he created a trio of beautifully shot - tonally serious horror films. This time out, Alex Aja has decided to make a teenager - spring break lovers' wet dream of a 3D HORROR Softcore masturbation fantasy. I can only assume that the MPAA was giggling so much that they missed the 5 minutes or so of naked Annette Kellerman/Esther Williams underwater ballet with carnal passion. I mean... you have two underage teen characters that got on, essentially... THE BANG BOAT. Doing bodyshots with lesbian kisses. But really... let's go back to that water ballet. I really truly felt that it could very well be one of the most beautifully constructed cinematic moments in history that will be a centerpiece upon Mr Skin dot com. This film fully embraces the absurdity of PIRANHA. I still prefer Joe Dante's original... but it is miles better than PIRANHA 2: THE SPAWNING which was only partially directed by James Cameron. But Aja's version... The gore is pretty fucking insane. The tits, the split-tail, the cock... its all there. And more. I do need to warn those of you that can't handle puking scenes... this has a pretty aggressive one... in 3D. That reminds me, I saw Scott Weinberg complaining about the 3D on Twitter... Actually with the exception of the Titles at the beginning - it worked cheesily well with the film. Of course, I was at the Alamo Drafthouse South - whose 3D has been personally tweaked by James Cameron's techies for optimal perfection - and has been left alone since. The result is a screen that has the ideal brightness - which is key when choosing a 3D theater. Sadly - that isn't always the case - so your miles may vary on the 3D. In Austin - at the Alamo South - I can say thumbs up for epic titties in 3D. Sadly, Miss Adventures in Babysitting... we don't see busting out. As she's playing the Sheriff - with the Son on the Bang Boat and the little kids on this little island needing to be rescued. The best performance by far belongs to the two naked chicks doing the underwater ballet. Nominate this film for BEST COSTUME DESIGN - brilliant costume design. Seriously. Do we really need to award that award based upon yards of cloth used in Victorian times - or do we judge the absolute perfect minimalism that was exhibited in this film. It is time for Sanja Milkovic Hays to thank the Academy. But outside the European Artsy Fartsy nude underwater ballet chicks - the best performance belongs to Christopher Lloyd. He's epic. Hearing ol Doc Brown exclaim crazily about the Piranhas - Joy. At least 5 times in his opening scene the audience applauded... not Christopher Lloyd's tits - but his oratory prowess. Exclamations that make you wonder... Why isn't he President of the United States. I was willing to vote for him based solely upon his work on TAXI. But here - I won't deny there's simply a nostalgic kneejerk expression of love for Lloyd. But also... he rules. Then there's Richard Dreyfuss' "could be Hooper" performance - and while I must admit, the audience was crazy enthusiastic about him... I was hoping there would be more of him. The PIRANHA are never real. These are epic prehistoric piranha. But they are animated to be closer to GREMLINS than predatory cock & tit eating Jesus symbols... There's no way you can talk about the film without going gore gaga over the main attack that hits during the Wet T-Shirt contest. I'm relatively positive that this film used more blood than any film in film history. I'm thinking Elevator scene in THE SHINING... times 3000. More than that though was the crazy awesome gore by KNB. There's crazy awesome make-up effects here that just don't stop. For every moment that the CG fish get on your nerves, there's 6 gore gags by KNB that are just epic. But is it a good film. Before the film, Eli did an impersonation of Aja's intentions in making this film as described at a certain get together of a few members of the SPLAT PACK... and the word, "Guilty Pleazhure" came out of Eli's frenchy best Aja speaking mouth. "The guilt will cause exquisite pleazhure. The pleazhure of guilT!" This is that film. You can't describe the movie as great... other than the underwater naked makeout ballet... which I have to say isn't quite at RED SHOES levels. But it is way easier to pound one out to. As I was saying, you can't describe the movie as great, but you could possibly have a great time with it. If you don't want to see something goofily ridiculous... then don't drop the change on the movie. But if you and your friends want to laugh at the utter absurdity of prehistoric piranhas chewing through a woman's face and out her mouth... or what is left of a Playboy Playmate's body that can float... or any numbers of other absurdist goofy, ridiculously unlikely scenarios and situations... well then, this is a pretty great time. Just don't expect to see it anywhere near Oscar time... unless it is for Sanja Milkovic Hays' brilliant minimalistic costume design. Cuz that folks... that is fucking art. Good night and dream of 3D boobies by the bushel. That's what this movie is all about! Oh - and gore. Lots of it. And gremlin fish. And body shots... both meanings of that.

Readers Talkback

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  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:36 a.m. CST

    Sounds just awful

    by Drsambeckett1984

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:37 a.m. CST

    Nice Review.

    by JacksBloatedPayroll

    I actually want to see this. I'm surely going to hell.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:39 a.m. CST

    adam scott

    by charlesbronsonLIVES

    fucking rocks in this movie. so do naked tits and giant flying piranhas.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:41 a.m. CST

    A Belgian guy first! Wow

    by can-D

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:41 a.m. CST

    This and Jackass 3D is what 3D was really made for.

    by RedEgiraahgnal

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:41 a.m. CST

    Damn was too good to be true

    by can-D

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:43 a.m. CST

    I'm not even going to bother

    by cool_britannia79

    ripping this apart. Good wank material doth not a good film make.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:44 a.m. CST

    cool_britannia79

    by HEADGEEK

    and I say that in the review.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:50 a.m. CST

    Why do people jerk off into socks?

    by Tall_Boy66

    I don't get it. Been jerking off my whole life. Use tissues. Why would you want to ejaculate into a sock?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:54 a.m. CST

    I GET IT!

    by Joh Doe

    That's what was missing from Inception! The tits, the spilt-tail and, most importantly, the cock.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:56 a.m. CST

    Tall_Boy66

    by HEADGEEK

    Ya know - actually I didn't either. I used to punch a hole in a melon and put it in a microwave for 2 minutes - and then fuck that. Fucking amazing feeling - and a great snack afterwards. <BR><BR>Sorry... I heard someone say that in my "WHAT'S THE CRAZIEST THING YOU DID" contest for the CRAZIES screening I did. <BR><BR>I was pretty standard in my whack off rituals... except - the hot tub jets... goddamn I remember thinking that was heaven at 14. It gets so much better.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:57 a.m. CST

    Surprise: Harry enjoys another shitty movie.

    by Executor

    Really? Naked girls for two minutes and tons of blood. You know you can download Riley Steele movies and actually see her in hardcore action, so seeing a few minutes of naked boobs isn't that big of a deal. But if that and buckets of blood is all you need to have a good time, god bless you. The consensus is that it's a TERRIBLE movie. I don't know what happened to you. You used to be someone people could look to for a valid opinion. It's kinda sad. <p>Maybe you should have rubbed one out during Inception to help keep you awake. Or maybe Nolan should've dreamed of a lot of blood.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:59 a.m. CST

    And FYI: yes I've seen the movie.

    by Executor

    So I know it sucks.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4 a.m. CST

    by Bodacious_Crumb

    I used a Davy Crockett coonskin-cap as a kid to pound off into. That was softer than anything else. Jessica Lange in King Kong was a memorable target.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:03 a.m. CST

    Really?

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    People are really sharing jack off rituals with each other in this talkback? Really? Fucking hell.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:09 a.m. CST

    It's not HIGH ART

    by Chocolate_Giddyup

    but damn, if you can't have fun watching this flick (like the opening crowd, including myself, of 4-strong did tonight) then you need some Puppy Uppers. Because it was a blast.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:09 a.m. CST

    Harry is nearly 40 years old.

    by TommyGavinsEgo

    That is all.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:12 a.m. CST

    ...ruined socks....

    by DANGER_DIABOLIK_

    ...that's an image, no one wanted to know about....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:20 a.m. CST

    And Harry losing ALL credibility in 10...9...8...

    by Neck_Lucas

    Jesus Christ Knowles..This pretty much puts the icing on your Inception debacle. Any credibility you had left is completely fucking gone dude. Inception - Fall Asleep..Pirahna 3d - Filling socks with cum...way to go man...you are a fucking miracle Harry

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:21 a.m. CST

    what about that 30 minutes that you

    by Seph_J

    slept through Harry? Aren't you gonna go back and see it again before you post the review?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:23 a.m. CST

    Executor

    by HEADGEEK

    Fine - I get that it is an easy joke to make fun of a guy who had less than 12 hours sleep over a 4 day span for losing consciousness, and being PISSED ABOUT IT. Not at the movie, which I commit the horrible crime of "ONLY LIKING" on my second viewing. <BR><BR>God forbid anyone say they prefer 3 of Nolan's previous films. I'm sorry if watching it i felt the pretension of the movie and the overly composed and boring action scenes - which I felt didn't compare to the films they were taken from. And that the fast and quick ways he played with the rules, then later rewrites them to simulate a need to create tension, when nothing that anybody is doing actually matters one iota for the good of anyone, save for an immoral intellectual property thief... Essentially a mental plagarist. <BR><BR>The only characters I loved in the film were Ellen Page and Tom Hardy. But I hated the way obvious character name for Ellen - which essentially told me right from the get go what that character was up to and about. Or was I supposed to admire the overt obvious Greek myth ripping? Oh well, I guess being obsessed with Mythology in Elementary school didn't help. <BR><BR>Yes, I get it that many of you think it seems to be the greatest movie of all time and usher in the second coming of Kubrick... but tell me, what do you find so amazingly original about the film? Idea Theft is not original. In fact it happens every day. Got a letter today from a guy that has a script titled 7 MINUTES OF HEAVEN that he's written - but now he's screwed because JJ has the exact same project moving - and they've never met. So obviously Hollywood has had professional Idea thieves on the payroll. As for planting an idea in someone's head as if it were their own. Any good con man could do this over 2 drinks. <BR><BR>But I get it. You're the wanker that comes into a completely unrelated talkback to hurl insults and bring up off topic material. Fine, I get it. You rule. I suck. Lesson learned, move along.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:24 a.m. CST

    It just blatantly apparent that Harry HATES movies..

    by Neck_Lucas

    ..that you actually have to pay the fuck attention to whats going on..theres really no OTHER way of putting it...Piranha, Nightmare on Elm Street, Expendables..One big Harry milkshake..Inception...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:25 a.m. CST

    Neck_Lucas

    by palimpsest

    That ain't icing...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:31 a.m. CST

    "Any Good Con Man could do this over 2 drinks"

    by Neck_Lucas

    Apparently they couldnt do it to you Harry..You'd fall asleep after the first drink. Harry again, the aregument people are making HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU NOT LIKING INCEPTION....but man..if you want to throw down the "whats so original about inception" gauntlet after cumming in a tube sock over Piranha..thats really an argument no one here really has to make..lol..It has to do with your Laise' Faire attitude toward it..you posted a 3 paragraph review like a kid writing his book report on the bus to school and did a half assed job of it, 3 weeks after the movie came out..Its just pathetic man that you run a site like this and jump the shark on the most talked about movie of the year so far..thats all man...its compelely ridiculous

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:32 a.m. CST

    btw...

    by HEADGEEK

    Films are meant to be judged upon the genre and purpose under which they were made and presented. For INCEPTION - I went in thinking it was going to be a GAME CHANGING FILM THAT WOULD REWRITE FILM HISTORY - because that's what I kept hearing from critics whom this summer had brutalized. For PIRANHA 3D - I went in wanting blood, boobs and all in 3D - and yeah, that's what it does - plus fun cameo-esque performances by a pair of my fave actors. So it slightly exceeded expectations. But I still admit, that doesn't make it a good or great film, just a possibly great experience. And if you don't know the difference, you probably know zip about film.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:34 a.m. CST

    Wonder how many readers wont get the Red Shoes comment

    by TheJudger

    Ah we are getting old Mr Red. <P> I was never a sock man. I could never deal with the guilt if that sock was accidently reworn by my dad or something. I guess i was more of a shower drain toilet tissue man. My poor parents... the family pack of toilet paper used to last a month then puberty hit and it lasted about a week, and the tub never drained the same. I did the paper towel thing once, and it clogged the toilet. No more bounty for me. Ah memories

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:34 a.m. CST

    So you get your expectations from other critics Harry?

    by Neck_Lucas

    wow man..just..wow.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:34 a.m. CST

    Harry, Executor isn't alone.

    by Seph_J

    The fact that you found so little good in Inception is kinda staggering. You ought to be rewarding films with intelligence and ambition, not just giving enthusiastic passes to Piranha 3D.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:35 a.m. CST

    Best red shoes was the groupie bitch one

    by TheJudger

    The one where she got pounded by the metal band in the back of the tour bus. I think it crashed, maybe the driver was socking one out....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:36 a.m. CST

    Neck_Lucas

    by HEADGEEK

    Actually, you seem to know nothing about me. I love smart movies. That's why I greatly prefer Scorsese's mind fuck film earlier this year.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:36 a.m. CST

    Why won't anyone hire Christopher Llyod?

    by Ronald Raygun

    I used to think he just retired, but this proves otherwise. Did the guy pull a Mel Gibson and reveal himself to be anti-semitic in public or something? Cause I can't think of another explanation. He's an icon of a character actor on the same level as Slim Pickens, yet nobody, not even Robert Zemeckis, uses him anymore.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:36 a.m. CST

    I know a three year old who says

    by Seph_J

    "if you don't agree with me that dipsy is the best teletubbie then you dont know zip about teletubbies!"

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:40 a.m. CST

    Sure you "enjoy" smart movies

    by Neck_Lucas

    You just like the thought of masturbating into socks over shittier ones more..

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:40 a.m. CST

    Harry.....err..... what was so

    by Seph_J

    original about Shutter Island? <p> It wasn't a bad film by any means, but... in what way was it original?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:41 a.m. CST

    And how was Shutter Island a bigger mindfuck then Inception?

    by Neck_Lucas

    As some one who stayed awake for both films on the first viewing..im curious

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:43 a.m. CST

    INCEPTION's genre and purpose: a) heist b) summer thrills

    by palimpsest

    Two big ticks there. That said, I'm sure I'll catch up with PIRANHA sometime, if only because Aja's previous movies have been pretty good on the whole. I think the issue folks is getting at is precisely the "game changing film that would rewrite film history" stuff (though that's perhaps overstating the buzz on INCEPTION). Given the high profile of the film, geek expectation, coverage elsewhere etc, for Harry to treat the movie in the way he did was a mistake. Not in term's of the review content / Harry's opinions on it necessarily, but the way he treated the movie and the (insert number of regular readers) fangirls and boys who come to this site. There's the issue. Compound this with the contrasting SCOTT PILGRIM coverage / defence / eulogising, and you can see why people will cry "shill" etc.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:43 a.m. CST

    I really do hate rubbing this in man..

    by Neck_Lucas

    but you just have to realize that every film you pretty much review from here on out is going to be judged against your lazy attitude toward inception.."Napped During Inception" is pretty much your "Nuke The Fridge"...just truth man.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:43 a.m. CST

    Harry's gone.

    by Seph_J

    He tested the waters and got eaten alive.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:46 a.m. CST

    Classic

    by cryosleep

    Harry moaning at people who call him out on his OWN double standards, prejudices and lack of integrity when it comes to "reviewing" films.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:46 a.m. CST

    Maybe his sock dried on his cock or something

    by palimpsest

    I feel ill just typing that.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:49 a.m. CST

    Harry called someone a Wanker!

    by yodalovesyou

    That made me smile and almost forgive him for the never-ending Scott Pilgrim shilling that's been threatening to destroy us all.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:49 a.m. CST

    Shutter Island?

    by syn_flood

    How the fuck was that a "smart movie"? It was a really well made B-movie, that's all. Then again, this is from someone who loved Van Helsing.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:51 a.m. CST

    So, better than Lake Placid but not Tremors?

    by Mr Nicholas

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:51 a.m. CST

    Seph J

    by HEADGEEK

    Loved the Cinematography, the premise, Tom Hardy, Ellen Page, the set design, the score. I liked Leo, Joseph, the multiple levels of consciousness - but didn't like the limits that Nolan boxed himself into with his action scenes - which had been done better. The car chase scene in DARK KNIGHT - far more epic. SKI SCENES - seriously - have you ever seen a Bond film - much less ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE. And while I love Marion to death - I just never bought into her character - which sure, I could explain away as being a broken character cuz it is only a mental impression of the real character that I never really meet. <BR><BR>I only like it. Rate it above INSOMNIA & FOLLOWING - two films that I also like, but don't love. <BR><BR>Do y'all really think it's the 3rd best film of all time like IMDB? How many of the other 99 films in that top 100 have you seen? Did it really crack your top ten films of all time? <BR><BR>Sorry I didn't love it, but my expectations were pretty stellar based on what I heard from Beaks & Moriarty - and it just didn't meet those expectations. It had been overhyped to me... something that apparently I've done to y'all before. It happens. Different people approach movies with different expectations and desires. I was expecting this thing to be BEING THERE good. And it wasn't. I wanted this to blow my mind, instead it reminded me of some of my college psy classes. I saw metaphors instead of people. Pawns on a chessboard instead of viable characters.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:51 a.m. CST

    "Wanker"

    by Seph_J

    is a step forward Harry. Good.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:51 a.m. CST

    I hope Harry's not on a percentage of SCOTT PILGRIM's box office

    by palimpsest

    Now that would be irony, my friends...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:52 a.m. CST

    Harry stop explaining yourself

    by theycallmemrtibbs

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:53 a.m. CST

    He could combine his talkback rebuttals

    by palimpsest

    into a review.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:54 a.m. CST

    by cryosleep

    I'm sure that had there been "pwesents" involved, Inception would have been rated among the great, classic films like Godzilla and Van Helsing.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:55 a.m. CST

    Why So Serious TB'ers

    by TheJudger

    Get over yourselves. Harry is allowed to have his opinions, you dont have to share it, but you should respect it. He's explained his opinion more than once, and you still cant accept/respect it. Move on already. Everyone has the right to feel however the fuck they want to feel about entertainment. <P> Some of you guys act like the film is the cure for cancer or something. Fuck.....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:55 a.m. CST

    Yes seriously

    by Seph_J

    that was actually more of a review than your 'review' was.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:55 a.m. CST

    Heres Harry's Piranah Review...

    by Neck_Lucas

    Paragraph 1 - "wet t shirt contest"..Paragraph 2 - "Pert nipples, fake boobies"..Paragraph 3 - "Masturbation Fantasy"...Paragraph 4 - "Body Shots and lesbian kisses"..Paragraph 5 - "The tits, the split tail, the cock"..Paragraph 6 - "Titties, Bang Boat".. Paragraph 7 - "2 Naked Chicks"...Paragraph 8 - "Lloyd's Tits"..Paragraph 9 - "Wet T Shirt Contest"...Paragraph 10 - "Naked Ballet"...Paragraph 11 - "Chewing through a womans face"..Paragraph 12 - "3d Boobies"....So I guess what we learned is Inception really just needed more Objectification and Nudity and that review would have been half as long or detaled as this..I hope Nolan is taking notes for Catwoman in B3..

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:56 a.m. CST

    Harry,

    by theycallmemrtibbs

    If you didn't like Inception guess what? Shit happens.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:57 a.m. CST

    Not the cure for caner....

    by Seph_J

    but possibly the cure for 'Piranha' 'Van Helsing' etc. <p> Which is why we should all be behind it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:57 a.m. CST

    Ronald Raygun...

    by Righteous Brother

    funny you mention Christophr Lloyd, I was watching One Flew Over The Cuckoo's nest the other night and was reminded what a great actor he is, and realised I hadn't seen him in anything for a while.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:58 a.m. CST

    "He could combine his talkback rebuttals into a review"

    by Neck_Lucas

    lol..Palimpsest..you win the internet for the night.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:04 a.m. CST

    I'm sick and tired...

    by NeilMcCauleysBrother

    ...of coming across this site and seeing "You'll have to forgive me, I only got 3 hours sleep in the last 36 hours"-type "articles"; it's not like you have to, you know, get yourself all presentable and actually drive to work...You just walk 2 feet and you're there. And then the illiterate juvenalia begins...Shame, really.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:04 a.m. CST

    "I saw metaphors instead of people"

    by Neck_Lucas

    Wait Harry..Arent you as big a star wars nut as anyone out there?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:04 a.m. CST

    Christopher Lloyd

    by Seph_J

    for The Return of Roger Rabbit 3D

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:05 a.m. CST

    really don't know why...

    by billyhitchcock1

    ...Harry put's up with all your shit! if it was me i would disable TB altogether. if you want to read his opinion fine, if not, fuck off.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:06 a.m. CST

    Harry? Did Nolan Trash Your Lights?

    by HarryWhereIsYourInceptionReview

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:07 a.m. CST

    He puts up with it because

    by Seph_J

    it is his job to talk about films and be torn to pieces. <p> Besides if Harry disabled TBs then the site would die overnight.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:11 a.m. CST

    possibly true...

    by billyhitchcock1

    ...but his mental health would probably improve 10 fold. i know i couldn't handle this much grief from complete strangers.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:12 a.m. CST

    although saying that...

    by billyhitchcock1

    ...it's probably because it's from stangers that it rolls off like water off a ducks back.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:13 a.m. CST

    but you don't own a film review website

    by Seph_J

    and then begin your review of one of the years most popular films with "I fell asleep for 30-40 minutes and anyway it underwhelmed the fuck out of me". <p> People who come to his site, providing him traffic and clicking on the adverts deserve better.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:13 a.m. CST

    BillyHitchcock..

    by Neck_Lucas

    Bascially it works like this..We put up with Harry talking about jerking off into tubesocks..He puts up with us calling him out on complete and utter bullshit like his explaination for not liking INception "It was Beaks and Moriarty's fault for planting an idea in my mind"...OH See what I just did there.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:14 a.m. CST

    Billyhitchcock1

    by cryosleep

    As a self-proclaimed "man of the geek people", Harry has opened himself up for ridicule and scrutiny years ago by first claiming the site as a haven for geeks by geeks, only to deteriorate it year by year with horrendous, primary school level rants, constantly changing opinions (many of which stem from questionable backgrounds, like friendships and alliances with studios and stars), and inherent juvenile behavior which aren't the hallmarks of any critic or journalist which Harry so eagerly claims and wants to be. That's why the heckle the hell out of him.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:15 a.m. CST

    Harry, a retort...

    by WavingFlagsInSpace

    …to your post earlier. I followed the ‘Inception’ thread waiting for you to reply and you never did. Apparently you tweeted a lot, made mention in a Scott Pilgrim thread, but never actually turned up in the thread dedicated to your own ‘Inception’ review, yet you have the audacity to call out a talkbacker with the following comment: “You're the wanker that comes into a completely unrelated talkback”.<p>Where the hell else was he supposed to go, Harry? You didn’t bother turning up in the Inception thread so please, tell me, where should he post?<p>And where did Nolan play hard and fast with the rules?<p>Do you mean about Tom Hardy using a bigger weapon and telling JGL to “dream bigger”. You make so much of that line, but could it not have been a minor part of the banter that existed between the two characters throughout the rest of the movie?<p>They were ‘at’ each other in a cutting, but friendly, way throughout and Eames’ line is just another amusing way of saying, “My dick is bigger than yours”. It didn’t have to mean “We can dream up anything in this world and use it to our advantage.” That idea was used to great effect by the Wachowski’s.<p>And “any good con man could do this over 2 drinks”. Really? Break up your father’s multinational power conglomerate?<p>I can picture it now: “Fancy a pint?”<p>”Love one.”<p>”Breaking up companies is a great idea.”<p>”Hmmm. Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.”<p>”Shall I make that two pints?”<p>”Oh, go on then. And while you’re at it I’ll pull apart a lifetime’s work. Seems like such a good idea now. Can’t believe I didn’t think of it first. Buy me another drink and I’ll try to insert my head up my own ass.”

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:16 a.m. CST

    neck_Lucas

    by HEADGEEK

    I'm a human animal capable of thinking, shitting, fucking, laughing, and I'm sure a couple of other things. I wasn't aware I was only allowed to love HIGH MINDED films. I thought we liked films like CADDYSHACK too. Or GREMLINS. Or even the original PIRANHA. And still have the capacity to love JAWS over all that. I'm sorry if it doesn't compute that I can love Goddard and Herschell Gordon Lewis. That I can love German, Swedish, French, Spanish, Indian, Chinese, Japanese, Aussie, Iranian and American cinema. That I can appreciate silents and 3D. That I can love the Oscars and the MTV MOVIE AWARDS and think both are equally ridic. That 16-17 years ago I was a snobbish film student that thought the sun and moon rose around the films my Film Profs indoctrinated me with, but soon realized... they had only scratched the text books of cinema, and not the pulp. That there is more to cinema than ART. That's one aspect, absolutely, but not a healthy diet. I can enjoy the innocence of DISNEY and the perversity of the Dark Bros. That I prefer classic Shaw Brothers to the modern Kung Fu films - simply because the Shaw Bros stuff makes me love it as I originally loved Kung Fu when it was introduced to me - but that I lose my mind when I see something like IP MAN or Tony Jaa. I'm incredibly widely versed in pretty much all areas of cinema. As a result, I don't resemble in any way the average movie goer. I simply have been devouring cinema at a rate most people can't imagine... pretty much since birth. I know that's hard to believe - but you've probably not met my father. I love contemplative cinema and stadium cinema. Documentaries, Foreign films and goddamn I love Genre films. Pretty much all the genres. My favorite genre? MUSICAL. Shocking? Not if you know me. Which is why Scott Pilgrim hit me the way it did. <BR><BR>I get the heckler phase of film appreciation, when the experts knew nothing and you know it all. When the experts are aging and you're the only clear vision of what makes film great. Yup, done that. Moved past it. Got to the point where I stopped thinking about whose opinion mattered most, who was most right - and started to concentrate on just expressing myself, speaking for me and writing for my friends. Because ultimately, that's what matters most. Being honest with your own emotions, writing about film so your friends better understand you through your writing. And the history of it all... I enjoy that perspective too. I am well aware that I'm wildly unpredictable sometimes - and I really do envy the love and passion that you all have for INCEPTION - and I wish I'd seen it without hype, early in the screening process - and not after an incredibly exhausting 4 day convention, where I was trying to decide if I would become involved with FAMOUS MONSTERS. I wish I'd skipped that first screening of INCEPTION altogether. That i had stayed in bed, and seen it that Friday of release instead. But I guess nobody else has been exhausted after a 4 day bender with Capone. Nobody ever missed a lecture by napping because you'd been up cramming for tests for a week. 4 days of waking at 7am and going to sleep at 4am - do take their toll. I'm just glad I wasn't driving.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:19 a.m. CST

    Harry = pwned

    by SLY_STALLONES_COCK_VEIN

    Harry, you have lost what little credibility you once had. That's why people are hijacking unrelated talkbacks to flame you for your Inception review. Your rebuttals are only making things worse. Give it up you fat fuck, and just hold your hands up and say you didn't understand Inception. Oh, and BTW please don't cite Shutter Island as a 'clever' movie - it completely undermines your argument

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:21 a.m. CST

    Sooo was it worth it?

    by vin_diggler

    I am not sure if Harry is recommending this film or not. I am not expecting Citizen Kane or anything, But before I shell out $12.00 for this movie I need to know I will get my money's worth. IS the 3D watchable or is it another Clash of the Titans? Also, If you have seen the film and did not like it, please give a better review other than stating "it sucked!" Why did it suck? Give examples. I was really looking forward to seeing this film this weekend but I am still not sure if it's worth it or not.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:22 a.m. CST

    Irrelevant

    by cryosleep

    Excuses at not doing your job. Any other place a critic would get FIRED or at least warned sternly for not writing like his job was, but instead saying; "hey, man, I'm a human, I've got ISSUES man!" Instead try to man up and admit that you, yourself, messed up and wrote a half-assed review then refused to even discuss the valid complaints against it, until it came to the point of insulting others about it and writing that sorry excuse of a post which makes absolutely no sense to the argument. We get it, you were different probably years ago, doesn't matter, we're talking now - at this moment and why you're literally sleeping on the job.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:22 a.m. CST

    Harry is a big red-haired loveable lug..

    by Righteous Brother

    Ok, I know his reviews are somewhat idiosyncratic, but they are refreshing. He didn't say he hated Inception, it just sounds to me like it didn't quite live up to his expectations. I mean its had great reviews an all, and it was Nolan's follow-up to The Dark Knight. So Harry liked Piranha 3d - he wanted tits and blood, some nice cameos and that's what he got. We shouldn't drag Harry across the coals over this. I'm sure Harry would agree that Inception is the better film, but judged by expectations, he enjoyed Piranha 3d more; and you know that's ok.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:26 a.m. CST

    Harry's whining like a rape victim

    by MattmanReturns

    You should expect to take shit for not liking Inception, and praising the shit out of Expendables, Scott Pilgrim, and now Piranha 3D. Gimme a break.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:30 a.m. CST

    Heartfelt, Harry

    by Seph_J

    and probably all true. But can you honestly say that Piranha deserved a more enthusiastic review than Inception? <p> I get that enjoying films is about more than just what we learn in film school or at Uni (a lot of us have been there too, remember) but to actually own a website and make money from it by discussing films, there MUST be an awareness of what constitutes a film with ambition and incredible scope. It doesn't matter if you 'got' the film or if you noticed the emotion in the fact that he couldn't see his kids faces (pretty heartbreaking stuff in my opinion), the basic fact that there is a filmmaker out there who can dream this up, and has the power and ability to make it, get it into screen and have a highly successful and popular film is cause for massive celebration! And you (as a lover of all cinema) ought to be right behind it, drawing attention to it and praying that more films which dare to be different are made. <p> Your comment about the characters being metaphors instead of people is very disappointing. Can you tell me any characters in films like Van Helsing and Piranha which are more than just one dimensional action heros or one dimensional wank-material. Cobb had motivation for everything he did, as did all the other characters. And on another level they symbolised things. <p> If you read back over your Piranha 'review' to your descriptions of the characters in that film, I'm sure you'll see what I'm getting at.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:30 a.m. CST

    So Harry your excuse is...

    by Neck_Lucas

    "I was tired and It's my friends fault for hyping it so much"..Thats your excuse for not reviewing it for 3 fucking weeks? And then writing a review that even the most devoted "Cliff Notes" reader would laugh at? Ah I get it now..lol. Again Harry..It has NOTHING to do with whether or not you liked it..You run a fucking movie review and news site..And you just couldn't be bothered to devote the kind of time and anticipated film as much as Inception is or was, that you can to something Like fucking Piranha's and tits. Thank Christ Beaks and Moriarty werent there to tell you what to think about 3D tits and killer fish.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:31 a.m. CST

    Harry should ban Headgeek

    by cornholiosbungholio

    Seriously, that guy is doing a psycho-analysis of Harry and should go the CTM way!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:31 a.m. CST

    But...

    by HEADGEEK

    I did go to that screening... and after a suck ass summer, I was ready for what I thought was an absolute sure thing. THE MOVIE that I was dying to see. So much so, that even after a 4 day weekend of no sleep - rather than rest properly as my wife suggested, I went. Why? Because dammit, I wanted a movie that I could give myself body and soul over to. I wanted a film that I loved so much, that I could call my producing partner Thomas Tull, who made the film - and tell him... "DUDE - UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE - HOLY SHIT! JUST WOW!" Instead, I had to talk to him about how I couldn't write about it yet, because at that point I hadn't fully seen it... because it knocked me out... literally. And not in the right way. It has been incredibly unfortunate that since Thomas and I got together on this COMIC CON doc, that I hated CLASH OF THE TITANS and merely liked, with criticisms INCEPTION. <BR><BR>But I won't lie to a partner and a business associate, or to y'all. I respect my reality to much for that. So I admit everything. Warts and all. I actually don't have warts though. Had this friend once named Stormy that had them all over his fingers and constantly had to get em burnt off chemically, but they kept growing back. Wonder what happened to him. <BR><BR>Well, I have to hit the sack, gotta wake up in 4 and a half hours. I'll probably check in - in about 8 hours. See ya then...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:33 a.m. CST

    Seph_J

    by HEADGEEK

    You didn't see that underwater nude ballet in 3D. GENIUS I tell ya.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:33 a.m. CST

    Oh and Harry...

    by WavingFlagsInSpace

    ...it is adorable when Americans say "wanker". ADORABLE. You folks make it sound so cuddly!<p>Us Brits normally throw it around with the jiggling wrist movement as well which makes it more tawdry.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:35 a.m. CST

    by cryosleep

    You won't lie to us? *cough*godzillavanhelsingpwesentseliroth*cough* Also, make up your mind - was it the movie that bored you to sleep or the fact that you'd been up for four days in a row. You can't even seem to keep a story straight in a single talkback.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:36 a.m. CST

    Not doing yourself any favours

    by Seph_J

    Harry!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:36 a.m. CST

    Harry / Seph J

    by Neck_Lucas

    Yeah Seph you didnt see the underwater nude ballet..What..did you fall asleep during that part or something?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:37 a.m. CST

    Yeah, but us Brits can make "cunt" sound like a loveable insult

    by palimpsest

    Unlike the merkins, what with their "douche" and so on and so forth.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:38 a.m. CST

    Honestly, I want to see 1 Harry retort

    by Neck_Lucas

    Where he doesnt drop 3 or 4 fucking names in it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:38 a.m. CST

    Harry quit letting them egg you on

    by vin_diggler

    You didn't care for Inception. That's your opinion so stick by it. I can't believe your getting caught up in a talkback war. Hell Inception is old news anyways, can we stick to the subject of Piranah 3D?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:38 a.m. CST

    Righteous Brother

    by HEADGEEK

    Right, brother

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:43 a.m. CST

    anyway Harry it's been nice to get

    by Seph_J

    a little more clarity on your views of Inception. Cheers.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:46 a.m. CST

    palimpsest

    by WavingFlagsInSpace

    That whole douche thing just fails over here, doesn't it.<p>Unfortunately, due to my middle class upbringing my parents holidayed in France a lot. And a douche is always going to be a shower.<p>And 'cunt' is perfect in its 'one-syllable-drop-the-t' kinda way.<p>With 'wanker' Americans tend to drawl out the 'a': waaaaanker, whislt we tend to put all the stress on the 'k' and rush past the 'a'.<p>Apologies for the meandr, people. Back to HEADGEEK review bashing...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:57 a.m. CST

    Harry's Inception Review

    by huskerdu2

    For me 'Inception' was a terrific fun. It was well mounted, well performed and well executed, but most of it all it was entertaining. Sure, maybe some of the 'references' are on-the-nose if you're reasonably well read and perhaps some of the exposition is a little too broad, but this isn't a movie for the precious fanboy, part-time cineaste or the film school lecturer. It's a film for Average Joe Public who wants to go to the multiplex on a Saturday night and be transported for 2 1/2 hours. It's also a film for the 13/14 year old kid in some shitty suburb somewhere who's going to see it and have his or her mind opened to a whole world of possibility in terms of films/books/TV. They ain't gonna gravitate to Cronenberg or Kubrick or Kaufman or William S Burroughs or Phillip K Dick or David Lynch or Dennis Potter on their own, but a movie like 'Inception' will act as a gateway to all of that. As for this whole 'lack of imagination'/'dream bigger' criticism - when all's said and done, the movie isn't REALLY about dreams. Like 'Memento' before it 'Inception' is much more about the nature of storytelling, the role of the 'fallible narrator' and how synthetic the whole notion of movie 'reality' and 'emotion' really is. Because of that, comparing 'Inception' to flipping 'Nightmare on Elm Street 3' or 'Dreamscape' is just...well, plain wrong. If you're gonna compare 'Inception' to another movie then at least compare it to something which deals with similar subject matter like, I dunno, 'Synedoche, New York'. That film arguably does the whole metatextual angle in a better and more successful way than 'Inception', but then 'S,NY' isn't concerned with being an accessible or entertaining piece of movie making in the same way. But the parallels between that film and 'Inception' are at least worth discussing. But let's be honest here, no one would have an issue with Harry's review if he was actually consistent in his likes and disliks and didn't go ga-ga like an over caffeinated child over total mulch like 'Blade 2', 'GI Joe' and 'The Expendables', while nit picking like a goateed-pseud at genuinely well made and ambitious pieces of populist entertainment like 'Inception' or 'Toy Story 3'.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:07 a.m. CST

    Harry hate?

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    This is aimed at nobody in particular, just me venting over some of the things that have been going on in Talkback over the last few weeks.<p> Seriously, people come to Harry's site to hate on him? Fine, I'm coming round your house to fuck your wife, kick your dog and shit on your carpet! You better find it acceptable.<p> Harry is one of us. He's a movie fan and a geek that is capable of going batshit giddy over things that don't necessarily make sense. It is this infectious ridiculessness that makes this site still worth visiting. Well, that and some truly insane talkbacks and talkbackers.<p> I don't understand how or why some people don't kinda understand Harry after all this time?<p> The guy has been doing this (and I have been watching) since the mid 90's. And it still takes you by surprise?<p> This unabashed love of things and the ability to still approach things with the wonder of a geek, sometimes free of stuffy old logic, is what makes it work.<p> If you don't like it, you know what to do.<p> Interestingly a lot of the other so-called "High Brow" reviewers also loved the hell out of Piranha 3D and the common thread is that they dug what it was trying to achieve.<p> I think it depends on what you were looking for when you went in to see it as to whether you will enjoy it.<p> Maybe it is one of those films that makes the ultimate movie faux pas (unless genre and exploitation are your bag) by setting out to be exactly as shallow and brainless as required.<p> At least it doesn't pretend otherwise. That would be far, far worse.<p> As for basically imagining that ALL movies exist on the same sliding scale, one above another on the SAME scale, really? Really? You need somebody else to point out the flaws in this thinking?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:07 a.m. CST

    Its easier for Harry to type "tits" then to have a thoughtful di

    by Neck_Lucas

    i dont mean that as Harry is stupid..not by any means..I just think Inception completely overwhelmed him. It didnt mean exactly what He thought it would mean, therefore he wrote it off insteand of opening himself up to dialogue on a talkback like "what if the entire inception was on Cobb the whole time" or "wtf was micheal caine doing at the end of the film"...Harry simply didnt or couldnt raise a dialogue about it to the talkbackers..it was all about "I just didnt give a fuck"..I didnt give much a fuck about the Cobb character either (as it was the same character in Shutter Island)..but that was completely beside that point..the point was the "heist" and the fucking stunts and camera work..thats whats so amazing about Harry..he LOVES the shitty CGI in Van Helsing but doesnt mention one fucking peep about the actual camera tricks in Inception...It takes less time for Harry to write things like "Underwater Ballet is Genius but INception is not"..Again the whole issue is not what Harry thought about Inception..its the treatment he gave the film and his actions during and after it..end of story.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:19 a.m. CST

    by southafricanguy

    w

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:19 a.m. CST

    by southafricanguy

    w

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:23 a.m. CST

    Why the hell do you guys care sooo much

    by southafricanguy

    wether Harry did or did not like Inception? Geez, is Inception like the first good movie you guys have ever seen and now you re so in love with it that no-one is allowed to have just liked it, but not be Gah gah in love with it? Sorry guys, but every film has its detractors, and people that it was simply 'meh' for. At least Harry isnt like that giant cunt at chud (devin farce) who runs smear campaigns/jihads against films, and always has an agenda. Harry just did nt LOVE Inception, its not a fucking crime.... '

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:28 a.m. CST

    Harry, listen

    by Drsambeckett1984

    If you put as much effort into your reviews as you did the replies on this thread, maybe people wouldnt complain as much. <P> I think your wrong about Inception, you went in with the wrong attitude, it was never going to be a game changer, but it was the cleverest action flick for a long time. <P> And do you know what the best thing about Inception was? <P> It was ORIGINAL. Not a sequel or prequel, remake or reimagining. Nor based on a comic or novel. That is something that should be applauded.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:28 a.m. CST

    southafricanguy

    by cryosleep

    But Harry IS that guy - just depending on the movie. Or let's not forget pimping out Moriarty's script while lying that the author was unknown to him. Just google around, it's been documented well enough.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:29 a.m. CST

    In the immortal words of Chauncy Gardener:

    by Arch Nemesis

    I like to watch.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:36 a.m. CST

    I usually find Harry a little obnoxious

    by Norm Cascade

    You know-it-all pussies are way worse. I've gained nothing after reading this whining bullshit. I have wasted ten minutes scrolling through nonsense. Now I'm upset because I have nothing to show for it. Jesus Christ, Inception was "okay." Fuck off, kids. Make your own website to give out preachy analysis for the things you love. Isn't it tiring being this bitter all the time?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:38 a.m. CST

    Theres nothing more annoying than

    by Seph_J

    someone who comes on a TB to complain about all the people who came on the TB. <p> Norm Cascade this is you.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:42 a.m. CST

    I would just like to know what people thought about Piranha

    by vin_diggler

    But for some reason every talk back turns into an Inception debate. Does anyone have any opinions on Piranha 3D?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:42 a.m. CST

    We care about Inception because we WANTED Harry to Care too.

    by harryknowlesnothingaboutfilm

    Aint it cool is a big geek treehouse that belongs to harry. sometimes we are his friend so he will let us play and sometimes not. we may not like him but we like his toys. We like to pretend they are our toys too. And we all expected Harry to go Blade Runner, Aliens, Matrix, Inception. Welcome to the fold of great films. and he didnt like it and we all went 'what the fuck?!' and got annoyed. so he likes the boobies and gore more than one of the best films in the last ten years.....sorry i wsa trying to maybe justify his comments but really......nope bollocks if you want porn watch proper porn and if you dont like Inception then you really dont like film sorry but its true..

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:45 a.m. CST

    I was really looking forward to seeing this...

    by TheOutsider

    but the last horror movie you gave praise to was the Nightmare on Elm Street remake... and I went to see it... with that said, so you praising this worries me now.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:54 a.m. CST

    Inception wasn't that great...

    by SkunkApe007

    Inception actually kind of sucked...I agree with Harry on this one!!! I love smart films but this one just didn't work for me. Bring on the titty munching minnows!!!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:01 a.m. CST

    I saw "Eli Roth"

    by clupula

    and decided not to see the movie. I don't care if Eli Roth is a fucking janitor in the background of a scene, his name is an automatic pass on seeing the film.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:12 a.m. CST

    DON"T LISTEN TO THEM HARRY

    by phathands

    I like that you fessed up to falling asleep. It's your site; do what you want! And you went back to see it again before commenting.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:14 a.m. CST

    yeh Harry... fall asleep in ALL the good films.

    by Seph_J

    It doesn't matter, as long as you admit to it. <p> Thats the way to do your job!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:15 a.m. CST

    These people

    by phathands

    are the same people who say "this site has gone to hell" while they're coming back to it for the 15th time that day.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:17 a.m. CST

    these people?

    by Seph_J

    watch it

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:19 a.m. CST

    Why all the dancing? Obviously the movie sucks except...

    by Jack Burton

    for the big attack sequence near the end. Multiple reviews say that is the only part worth seeing so it's definitely a rental and not worth venturing out to see it. Also, there is a thing called the internet which in addition to being the depository of all human knowledge is also filled to bursting with free, quality porn. If you are forced to flog your molly to a horror B movie's bikini clad babes then you've got some serious problems with your search skills.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:19 a.m. CST

    Inception

    by phathands

    has a nice soundtrack

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:20 a.m. CST

    Of course Harry liked this, unlike Inception

    by Trazadone

    Harry is very predictable. He gushes over silly movies that don't require using one's brain. Look how fast he got this review out. I guess he didn't fall asleep during it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:21 a.m. CST

    That's not what I meant!

    by phathands

    by "these people"! I better split before Sharpton shows up.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:26 a.m. CST

    Fucking yuck.

    by dartofharkness

    Who wants to hear or think about that? Are you at all able to write a review devoid of sexual innuendo?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:27 a.m. CST

    This is tedious. Let's talk about boobies...

    by FlickaPoo

    &thinsp;&zwj;&zwj;&zwj;&zwj;<br>...BOOBIES!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:29 a.m. CST

    I was about to write about why THE_CHOPPAH

    by Seph_J

    was wrong, but then realised that if people can't see why a person whose job is to SEE a film and write about it should, under NO circumstances fall asleep in a film, then anything I write will certainly be beyond them.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:31 a.m. CST

    Look, Harry...

    by deckard82

    I respect you as a fan and critic and your review of INCEPTION, while I don't agree with it, is your review. I respect your opinion. It didn't take, so be it. I recently watched FISH STORY, based solely on Massa's masturbatory review. And I thought it was merely okay, it was slow and dragged a lot, and I didn't get why he went nanners over something so middle of the road. I think the talkbackers here are not so upset with your opinion of INCEPTION but rather your extreme lack of punctuality. This was a film for which this film was designed. And, generally, you've been extremely reliable about getting your review ahead of the game and on time. You gave that courtesy to THE LAST AIRBENDER, which, frankly, I don't think the readers here gave a shit about. But INCEPTION was the most anticipated film of the year, so it probably deserved your full attention and, while we waited almost a month for your review, you decided that Stallone and SCOTT PILGRIM were more worthy of your time and energy. And I get that you had a helluva time with PIRANHA 3-D, it's that type of visceral, fun flick, but seriously...that film doesn't really need to be seen that badly. I think anyone with a general knowledge of films, and horror/gore films at that, can pretty much construct a better film in their minds. We've probably all seen better tits and better kills before. But INCEPTION is a film to be debated, deconstructed, etc. Giving us only a handful of paragraphs and no real in-depth dissection of what didn't take seemed like someone throwing the dog a few scraps of dinner just to shut him up. I personally think that the lack of immediacy is why everyone is pissed off. And I think most believe that your slightly negative review (after all, you never said you didn't entirely like it, and that's where I think this line in the sand bullshit has to go; this "you either loved it/hated it and no in between" mindset is bordering on fascism) was partially motivated by the forums knocking down your door, demanding the review. But look at it this way: if people are so eager for your review and thoughts on a particular film, that means that have to at least respect your opinion. I still remember back in the day when you said you were "underwhelmed" by MATRIX RELOADED. And that was the point that I realized that you were a serious critic and you were able to see through the hype. For the future, however, I would strongly recommend that you treat each and every BIG EVENT film with the same measure of respect. I know you've got other side-projects and a wife and your time is precious, but if you had given the same review of INCEPTION as you did, only right away, I don't think this forum would be as harsh as it's been. Plus, I would also take a step back from the glad-handing and approach the films with a heavy dose of neutrality. You give IRON MAN 2 the red carpet treatment just because you and Favreau are buddies. But INCEPTION is treated as an afterthought because you don't know the director on that same level. In closing, keep up the good work and never mind the haters.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:34 a.m. CST

    Do you guys care what a retarded person

    by BP_drills_america_a_new_asshole

    thinks about movies? Do you go up to an obese guy in a wheelchair and ask his opinion about Inception? That guy is Harry. Harry is just a not very bright fat guy who likes the things that not very bright fat guys like - porn, food, stupid movies. That sums up Harry in a nutshell. Asking Harry for an inteeligent critique of Inception is like trying to have a discussion about Plato with a chicken packing factory worker.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:37 a.m. CST

    Inception review!

    by windomearle39

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:40 a.m. CST

    this site is going to hell.......

    by harryknowlesnothingaboutfilm

    i come here everyday. its set as my homepage for gawds sake......

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:41 a.m. CST

    Inception review

    by windomearle39

    I don't quite understand the hate, and in some cases, offensive comments regarding the review. As with any film some people like it others won't.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:42 a.m. CST

    Lloyd gotta eat

    by The McPoyle Clan

    He did a guest star bit on Chuck last season.<br><br>Anyway, he was pretty scarce and was basically flipping houses or some such to pass his time, until a wildfire burned a bunch of 'em down. Is there a correlation between that and his recent activity? I dunno.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:44 a.m. CST

    I liked this parana 3d review harry

    by Potatino

    I sometimes think hmm thats not appropriate language when i read your overenthusiastic and honest reviews, but in this case over enthusiastic use of saucy language seems mighty appropriate. Good job!!!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:48 a.m. CST

    Harry LOVED Serbian Film...

    by benlinus

    and thats just fucking sick....i pray he never plants his seed in anyone or any thing....nuff said.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:49 a.m. CST

    is harry a farmer now?

    by Potatino

    seed??

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:50 a.m. CST

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    Doc Brown, Uncle Fester, bad Klingon in Star Trek III. Christopher Lloyd can do pretty much what he wants from my point of view.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8 a.m. CST

    by Seph_J

    if you are an American and a Brit calls you a cunt, you can still be very sure that you are a cunt.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:06 a.m. CST

    The whiny bitches have got to go

    by nostairway

    I love how all these losers are complaining about Harry's taste in movies when he's openly admitting it isn't a good movie, just a guilty pleasure that can be enjoyed on a casual level. These same losers complain daily about Harry's reviews and the site in general, but here they are day after day coming back for more. Harry isn't your bitch. In fact, by acting like battered spouses that keep coming back for more you are all acting like his bitches. Either accept his opinions for whatever they're worth or go elsewhere. Otherwise you're Tina and he's Ike. Carry on Harry, you guys are doing a great job here.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:07 a.m. CST

    Hating Harry is your right

    by Steve T

    But the fact you all keep coming back here when the site infuriates you so much does make you a pretty dozy cunt doesn't it?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:09 a.m. CST

    lick lick lick

    by Seph_J

    nostairway, you missed a bit. Ask Harry to bend over a little more.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:10 a.m. CST

    worst. headline. ever.

    by HelveticaConspiracy

    thanks for that mental image, harry. (shudder). oh, and harry, i love ya big guy but we couldn't disagree more when it comes to films. you like really hollow stuff like expendables, new nightmare on elm street and fantastic four 2; and then you turn around and trash movies like inception (which i had my problems with, but would never write about in the off-handed manner you did). your tastes are definitely not my tastes (which, obviously, is cool).

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:11 a.m. CST

    boobies boobies blood and boobies

    by harryknowlesnothingaboutfilm

    oh i loves them. oh yes. how about writing something that makes sense. Fuck off I am having a wank...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:15 a.m. CST

    THE_CHOPPAH scares me

    by Seph_J

    as he should scare you too, if you value your lives.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:17 a.m. CST

    Harry is being disingenoius...

    by Billyeveryteen

    Clearly trying to exonerate his shitty behavior.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:18 a.m. CST

    I just used (and still use) a towel to jerk off

    by RedBull_Werewolf

    I lay it on the bed or the floor, do my busines, use the towel to clean my shaft and knuckles then ball it up and throw it in the laundry hamper. By the time i jerk off again It's dry and ready to be used again in the same fashion. I wash it about once a month to make it fluffy and soft again. I've been doing it that way for almost 20 years now...I love being single!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:18 a.m. CST

    If I was 13 and found this on Cinemax on a Saturday night.

    by Zombieflicker

    It would probably go down as my favorite movie of all time by the sound of it. That's why I like "Return of the Living Dead" so much, and "Revenge of the Nerds".

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:19 a.m. CST

    Harry, y'all need to stop saying 'y'all.'

    by HoboCode

    It's bad enough that you sound like a douche whining about how Inception didn't meet your bloated expectations, but when you say "y'all" over and over again it makes you sound like a dumb hick.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:22 a.m. CST

    Piranha versus Inception

    by rbatty024

    Films need to be assessed according to their particular genre. There's no comparison between Piranha and Inception because there's no comparing them. They're of completely different genres and thus have different expectations. That being said, I probably won't be seeing Piranha 3D.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:22 a.m. CST

    CRUMBS!

    by Joh Doe

    THE_CHOPPAH seems to think us Brits sit around the dinner table calling each other potty words! What a cunt.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:23 a.m. CST

    Chops!

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    The Choppah scares everyone! That is what he is here for.<p> I don't think anyone is ass-licking Harry, I just think several people (myself included) think the tone of a few things in the last few weeks have started to become coupled with some kind of unbelievable sense of entitlement as to what some people seem to expect and demand from this site. Very strange. They seem to have forgotten that coming here is a voluntary action, that Harry owns the site, and that all opinions (including those about movies) can be really subjective.<p> Or am I just being too fucking sensible to be in Talkback in the first place?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:25 a.m. CST

    Does Harry & AICN Back Yet ANOTHER Loser???

    by Graphix67

    SPLICE... MACGRUBER... SCOTT PILGRIM... (Just the few that immediately come to mind...) When will the publicity departments wise up and see that agreed upon and pre-determined "Thumbs-Up" ratings from Harry and Company doesn't mean jack shit if the majority of America simply isn't interested in seeing the film in the first place???

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:29 a.m. CST

    Good grief...

    by ClayG

    These talkbacks are so hypocritical. Many people here spend so much time talking about various films being 'overhyped' or 'overrated', then slobber all over the very films that fit the definition of the term. "Inception" has a fascinating plot, okay. It has good acting, okay. But it has exactly zero emotional content, and much of its plot material--and supposedly revolutionary visuals--were copied from better films, including The Matrix. I don't even like action films, so I'm not griping about the need for more action, What I generally want from films is to be engaged. I hate movies like Jackass or The Forty-Year Old Virgin because I have to forget that I'm a thinking human being to enjoy them. Inception wanted me to forget that I know how to feel, and instead just be impressed by the hollow shell of a brainy plot. Well, it's not the first smart film I've ever seen, and I wasn't impressed. Scott Pilgrim is a much better film. It dwells in the realm of the heart, more than the brain, but its genius is something its critics here seem to miss. Its fight scenes; the video-game motifs? They're METAPHORS, people. Did you really think they were literal? Are you that stupid? Scott Pilgrim is a kid whose only understanding of responsibility and going after something he really wants is--well, nothing, before he meets Ramona. And his model for fighting for a goal is video-game 'leveling' and combat; fighting the 'bosses' of a level for a reward of coins. Naturally, that's the symbolism with which the film delivers his journey to growing the fuck up. But did most people notice that--even when it's right there in your face? Apparently not. That's another problem with Inception. Dreams in most people's movies are metaphors. In Nolan's sloppy heist flick, they're literally dreams. Whooptee-shit. I love science-fiction--it's my favorite genre. But science-fiction, told as just an imaginative story with no substantial real-world corollary--or told with no aspect that engages the human heart--is empty bullshit. Inception is empty bullshit; it's the mental equivalent of jerking off into a sock. It's got ideas, but they go nowhere. I'm surprised so many people are so suckered that they refuse to see it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:31 a.m. CST

    Hmmmmm.

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    I predict that Harry could post a story about taking a shit and within 30 minutes it would become a talkback about Inception.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:31 a.m. CST

    I hate Inception = I must be cool

    by Seph_J

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:32 a.m. CST

    I agree with Harry

    by Megalodon3

    Inception was a bore - nothing mattered hence no tension - just lots of loud action scenes. I also thought The Dark Knight was a mess, but did enjoy Batman Begins and Memento a lot. Nolan is kind of overrated - not sure what all the fuss is about (other than box office numbers).

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    still talkin about Inception huh?

    by vin_diggler

    I keep coming back here hoping to get some insight on Piranha 3D and am not having much luck.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Shutter Island wasn't a mindfuck

    by Laserhead

    It was just a lousy movie.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    CHOPPAH

    by Seph_J

    That was last year right?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Cyrosleep.....fair enough points dude, but for

    by southafricanguy

    me I simply dont find Harry to be anywhere as bad as that cesspool Chud. Harry may often display strange tastes in film, and yeah we all know hes become something of a shill. But then Harry did nt give T4 four stars for Empire magazine, and then do a follow up story on his website on why its bad after it crashed and burned with other critics and at the b.o (im looking at you, you fat, sell out, bought and paid for review writing whore Devin Farce) and he may be very vocal about not liking a film, but I have never seen him dislike a film purely because of his personal issues with the person who made said film, and go out of his way to run a smear campaign, and fabricate bullshit out of pure thin air to be used in said jihad against a particular film or Film maker.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    More Important

    by bod33

    Than Harry's Inception review is, do you see Kelly Brooks minge in the movie.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Harry

    by sirens

    invite that loser cryosleep to your home and have a talk, face to face. I bet he's beating the wife at home because she disagreed also. Fucker.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:34 a.m. CST

    Redbull_werewolf

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    Fucking hell Man, I thought I was the only man in the world who did that!!!!!! Truly, it is the wank of champions!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:36 a.m. CST

    looking at you again you lying scumbag, story

    by southafricanguy

    twisting, poster child for man-child afflicted internet fanboys everywhere Devin Farce..

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:38 a.m. CST

    Weird Pub

    by Joh Doe

    Was it because you called the landlord a cunt? And when we drinking tea, we mostly talk about Harry's review of Inception.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:38 a.m. CST

    Why do Shutter Island and Inception keep getting compared?

    by HoboCode

    They are about two completely different concepts. Inception is about dreams and mind-control. Shutter Island was two guys in the real world playing a ridiculously improbable game to snap a guy out of his insanity.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:40 a.m. CST

    The Dark Knight

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    I ain't going to call anyone an asshole for having an opinion as opinions are subjective, and all are welcome to one, but I really don't know where the post event "Actually The Dark Knight sucked" movement is coming from. Is it just a backlash against the level of love for that film, or is it something else?<p> I watched it again at the weekend and think it is every bit as good as it was when I saw it opening night.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:40 a.m. CST

    SETTLE DOWN FELLAS, SETTLE DOWN

    by BringingSexyBack

    It's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:41 a.m. CST

    "THAT WAS LAST YEAR RIGHT?"

    by BringingSexyBack

    LOL

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:42 a.m. CST

    hell yeah Dude_gimme_tabs

    by RedBull_Werewolf

    I never got the fad of confining your load to a sock or a kleenex, Lay a towel out and spray that shit like peter north

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:42 a.m. CST

    SamBecket.....dude, how exactly is Inception

    by southafricanguy

    original? And I say this in the sense that imho nothing truly is original. It can only be given a fresh spin, or fused/combined together in an interesting way (which Inception does). But original? Ultimatly Inception does borrowa lot from Dark city, the Matrix, and the 13th floor(three films which Nolan openly admits to inspiring Inception), and the stunning anime Paprika for that matter....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:42 a.m. CST

    HOBONODES

    by BringingSexyBack

    Nailed Shutter Island right on the noggin. That's why I liked that movie a lot - took it for what it really is, not something based on twists.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:43 a.m. CST

    A SOCK, HARRY? REALLY?

    by BringingSexyBack

    You made your poor mother clean those things? Gross.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:46 a.m. CST

    Yikes, that sounds pretty awful.

    by tronknotts

    I still don't get the "The movie isn't that good, but there is hot chicks in it!" reviews. That's like reviwing a amusement park and saying "The rides aren't good, but there are free water fountains everywhere!" This is the internet, people, the land of milk, honey, and free pornography. C'mon now.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:46 a.m. CST

    YOU MIGHT'VE WIGGLED YOURSELF OUT FOR THE MOMENT, HEADGEEK

    by BringingSexyBack

    But wait until Asimov returns. He'll rip you apart like 3D piranha.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:53 a.m. CST

    Like bad movies if you want, just write good reviews

    by MrEkoLetMeLive

    If I have to read one more review on this site where Harry more or less gives his buddy Eli Roth a blow job I'm going to check myself into a hostel to be put out of my misery.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:54 a.m. CST

    Executor is a faggot bitch....

    by MJs_Cold_Dead_Pale_Corpse

    get off this website you snobby pussy, tired of your bitching

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:57 a.m. CST

    Executor - Inception was made for pedophiles

    by MJs_Cold_Dead_Pale_Corpse

    that's why you liked it so much.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:58 a.m. CST

    Why Bother With The 'Spoiler' Tag?????

    by HarryWhereIsYourInceptionReview

    We know the reveal is that it sucks. Though I am keen to see the Gianna cameo.......check out 'G For Gianna' folks!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:59 a.m. CST

    Southafricanguy, Harry did that as well

    by cryosleep

    Remember Godzilla? He was flown in for a screening at Madison Square Garden and gave the film a rave review - only to get backlash for it from pretty much everyone. Noticing that nobody else liked the film, he quickly backtracked and gave some flimsy excuse for changing his opinion - instead of manning up and admitting that it had been bought in the first place.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:01 a.m. CST

    THE_CHOPPAH: Didn't you realize...

    by onezeroone

    that both those movies could be sequel/prequel to each other? Imagine Leo's character to be the same in both movies and they both work perfectly as sequel/prequel to each other. Make for a perfect Double Bill, I'd say. Much better than Eli Roth double bill that Harry is splooging all over.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:01 a.m. CST

    THE_CHOPPAH

    by HoboCode

    You used the same words as I did but those are still two different things.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:02 a.m. CST

    I might actually see this stupid shit...

    by conspiracy

    Movies like this and Jackass are as close to Tractor Pulls and NASCAR as I get...sometimes it's fun to slum.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:05 a.m. CST

    Not sure what is worse

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    Reading Harry's cringe worthy explanation for his Inception review or the fact he used a sock<br />

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:07 a.m. CST

    MANBABY JERKS IT TO TRASH, BEFUDDLED BY CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED BLO

    by LaserPants

    It made him sweepy! Aww. Maybe eat a few flash fried hoagies and take a nap? <br><br>Seriously, man, you just completely annihilated any fleeting shred of credibility you once had. It's kinda sad, really.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:09 a.m. CST

    MANBABY BEFUDDLED BY CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED BLOCKBUSTER

    by LaserPants

    When you were sweepy, how much you wanna bet Yoko, your mail-order bride, was suckin' off some other dude in the bathroom? I think the chances are high to definite.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:10 a.m. CST

    Poor sock!

    by chibnut

    Anyway I could care less about boobs. Is the gore good? That's honestly all I care about. BTW I was at RiffTrax last night and there was this animated short before "Reefer Madness". Bill Corbett made a joke saying "That's how Harry Knowles sweats" or something along that line when a cartoon mouse was profusely sweating while scared. I was the only on the theater who laughed. Fun!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:11 a.m. CST

    harry says hes honest. warts and all.

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    If so, are you a sellout? Meaning do you givve good reviews when presented with money, dvd quote space, action figures, and/or socks?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:11 a.m. CST

    Re: Shutter Island

    by LaserPants

    If I could figure out the "twist" before even seeing goddamn movie? That's an epic fail. <br><br>Scorcese is great and all, but his best days are long gone. Shutter Island was LAZY and obvious.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:15 a.m. CST

    In Pirahna isn't there some big 30 minute feeding frenzy?

    by leo54304

    Just going off something thought I read or heard?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Harry's HILARIOUSLY Defensive Posts!

    by LaserPants

    OMFG! I love the internets. You rule you obese manbaby, you. Don't ever change. DE-EVOLUTION IS VERY REAL.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:17 a.m. CST

    I want to see a cool 3-D monster movie but all the nudity makes

    by BEYONDTHUNDERDOME2GIRLS1CUPBILLCOSBY

    i love naked ladies their boobs and asses a lot but in 3-d i'm afraid it might be too much of a distraction, i don't want to leave early to go masterbate at home, I wanna enjoy a cool story about deadly creatures in 3-D. So I'm up in the air about this. Are the pirahna shown in this film a lot?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:20 a.m. CST

    To be fair to those whose create

    by leo54304

    Whether they be writers, directors, musicians etc not everything they do is a home run, double or even a single. Sometimes they flat strike out. For example Lee/Kirby on the FF, 8/10 times they produced a good or great story but some of that stuff was bad. So if Inception or Shutter Island didn't do it for you, I'd consider them good ideas but not well executed.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:20 a.m. CST

    Piranha 3D Is Ultimately A Movie About Eating, Right?

    by LaserPants

    Any wonder the Obese Manbaby loves it? There was like, NO eating in INCEPTION.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:22 a.m. CST

    Harry, Harry, Harry

    by donchild

    where do we start….. with the bizarre fact that you’ve chosen a genuine class act of a movie like ‘Inception’ to attempt to write a negative review with the type of disdain normally held by the more sniffy mainstream critics when they’re lamenting the release of yet another summer stinker such as Van Helsing or GI Joe! Or the fact that having obviously seen a movie rich with subtext, thematic richness, a zero gravity action sequence that astonishes in its realisation (never worry about the Bond/Call of Duty snow action set piece, that only suffers having to follow the Gordon Levitt zero gravity scene), a fascinating & complex story that keeps on rewarding with repeat viewings and yet somehow are left with nothing to add to all this yourself! Instead you ascribe negative qualities to this movie that are not valid, such as the criticism that the goal of the inception itself does not seem to matter to the good of anyone save Cobb, yet it's clearly stated that the goal of Saito is to eliminate a company that is on the brink of becoming a new world superpower, which in effect poses a threat for all mankind, maybe this point needed to be hammered home a little further! You see Harry having read your reviews in the past I’ve come to realise that what you like to do most is to invent imaginary qualities for some pretty poor/average movies, yes films like Spiderman 3 & Van Helsing. While these movies can be appreciated on some level as entertaining but instantly forgettable summer fare you take the opportunity to jump in there and provide new levels of insight to these one dimensional pieces of entertainment as if we missed something, you’re interpretations of the chracters and they’re dilemnas & motivations are actually more fleshed out that what’s actually on the screen. I used to admire this quality in you Harry, in the face of the cynical barbs been fired at these kind of movies I liked the fact that you saw something better as if the cynics and high brow press where missing the point. Obviously every one has an opinion with the right to express while opinion is purely subjective, and yes every once a while all of us see a movie, read a book or listen to an album that has a lot positive noise about it and think to ourselves what’s so great about this? Fair enough, but Harry as founder of this site you hold a position of responsibility, even if Inception didn’t blow your mind it is being universally recognised as being a milestone movie in the fantasy/action genre, so for you as chief representative of this site (a huge advocate for this type of movie genre) to dismiss the movie so casually and refuse to acknowledge any of its many qualities (save the aforementioned zero gravity sequence) smacks of real bad form and seems borderline irrational to me.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:22 a.m. CST

    Inception rhyms with erection

    by Potatino

    I think that is why people are talking about it so much. Probably some sort of psychological and/or phallic and/or sexual thing. That is my current theory.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:23 a.m. CST

    BeyondThunder

    by vin_diggler

    I have been trying to get questions like yours answered all morning. But for some reason everyone wants to go on and on about Inception. We should get Harry to start an Inception talkback and then we can go in there and talk about Piranah 3D.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:25 a.m. CST

    Harry next time someone criticise your poor Inception review

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    Blame it on being drunk, whether you have fucked your boss or "accidently" shot your neighbour, it works everytime, just try it<br />You will say "uhh yeah I was so wasted"<br />We will respond "ha ha yeah you were", have a good laugh and then move on

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:26 a.m. CST

    Way that one girl with inner tube gets chewed up

    by leo54304

    Made think of Rosie O'Donnell chowing down on Miley Cyrus and Miley was never seen again. Man, thats a disturbing thought.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:31 a.m. CST

    Speaking of the IMDB top 250-Shawshank

    by Samuel Fulmer

    I think I'm more offended by The Shawshank Redemption being number 1 than Inception being number 3. We all know that at some point Inception will drop. For some reason that slightly above average film The Shawshank Redemption stays at one or close to it for years. Granted I like the film, but it's not even in my top 100 films of all time, let alone number 1.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:36 a.m. CST

    Films you think are okay but don't care for

    by Samuel Fulmer

    Here we go in honor of Harry and Inception, my picks are: Shaun of the Dead, Pan't Labyrinth, The Shawshank Redemption, City of God, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Kill Bill v.2, In Bruges.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:37 a.m. CST

    Oh and Benjamin Button!

    by Samuel Fulmer

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:39 a.m. CST

    ...Samuel, I just saw IN BRUGES...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...thought it was great, right up until the last couple of minutes.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Eli Roth has cred?...hey that IS NEWS

    by quantize

    the Jew Bear was about as threatening as a bunny rabbit in diapers...oh that's right, they were being IRONIC..har de fuckin har.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:43 a.m. CST

    wow...

    by smithy

    for all the heat Harry is taking from people saying that he is alone on liking Piranha 3d...<br /> <br /> take a look at rotten tomatoes - i know it's just an aggregate, and it is early, but the movie seems to be doing quite alright in the eyes of other reviewers as well

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:44 a.m. CST

    THE_CHOPPAH

    by quantize

    the Hanzo method eh?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:44 a.m. CST

    FlickaPoo-In Bruges

    by Samuel Fulmer

    I thought it was okay, just not really great like a lot of people claim it is. I'm just showing how I have a list of movies that people seem to fawn over (like people fawn over Inception) that I get ridiculed for not really caring for them, but the ridicule isn't going to change my opion, much in the way ridicule won't change Harry's on Inception (which by the way I thought was a great film, and yes better than Shutter Island which I also liked). I think all these brave internet souls that want to just jump on the bash Harry for not liking Inception bandwagon should post their own list of films that they don't like that defy the majority opinion.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:45 a.m. CST

    also

    by smithy

    please don't give me a hard time because i reference rotten tomatoes, which means i'm not 'indy' enough or something like that, or that i'm some kind of a fool for relying on other's opinion<br /> <br /> i'm just saying, that's all<br /> <br /> also, it's current rating, counting all critics, is 89 percent (as of aug 20 1045am eastern time)<br /> <br /> inception, 87 percent...<br /> <br /> granted, inception's average rating is an 8, while piranha's is only a 6.8<br /> <br /> and yes, i know, it's still early. but just throwing it out there

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:47 a.m. CST

    Woah, WOAH!

    by Lemure_v2

    You can bash Harry, you can bash Inception, you can bash each other, but DO NOT bash The Greatest Film Of All Time Ever. The Shawshank Redemption deserves to be at 1. It's more than stood the test of time considering how badly it flopped at the Box Office and then had all it's awards stolen by that silly Tom Hanks movie (where's that film now?). Shawshank is a classic story of hope and friendship that will never be beaten or slip outside the top 5. I'm done, back to trying to understand why Harry loves Van Helsing but doesn't get Inception...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:48 a.m. CST

    And in regards to Harry's criticism

    by Samuel Fulmer

    But I do see how it's easy to ridicule the guy since there are moments when he wants to play the "I'm a critic card" and other times where he wants to be seen as just another film fan. I think maybe the most famous instance of this was the wrong headed (and wrongly named) posting on "Why my friend Roger Ebert is dead.....wrong and here's why" on Kick Ass.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:49 a.m. CST

    Shawshank would deserve to be number 1

    by Samuel Fulmer

    If 95% of the films that exist were never made.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:50 a.m. CST

    And no Shawshank wasn't even the best film

    by Samuel Fulmer

    of 1994, that would be Ed Wood.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:50 a.m. CST

    Jerkoffs who whine about 'Harry Hating'

    by quantize

    have a very large black hole between their ears as they type because they forget the fundamental fact that the guy PROFITS from traffic that comes through here..whether its positive or negative. If you just want to slurp on his ginger mushroom cock then you need to get a grip on reality. We tap tap = Harry get goodies and lifestyle YOU DONT. Therefore he can take, not just a little bit, but a fucking LOAD of criticism from the ACTUAL people who line his pockets, blu ray and toy collections.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:50 a.m. CST

    you sad fuckers

    by savagedave

    Complaining that he enjoyed a film with GRATUITOUS FUCKING NUDITY. What have you got in your veins, tapwater?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:51 a.m. CST

    And I've sussed it out!

    by Lemure_v2

    When a "film critic" reviews a film they are telling you whether it is good or bad "as a film" - and all that implies. They do NOT tell you whether they liked it or not. Harry is not a "film critic", he is a "film lover", and he tells you how he felt about it. Keep that in mind and it all make sense.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:53 a.m. CST

    @Samuel Fulmer. As a die-hard Burton fan...

    by Lemure_v2

    who cried to see how low he'd sunk with Alice, Ed Wood is a brilliant film, but it's not quite in Shawshank's league.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:55 a.m. CST

    Actually...

    by Lemure_v2

    can we just quit with the whole "Shawshank isn't that good" nonsense. If only because it's staying at the top of all film charts and there's nothing anyone can do about it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:55 a.m. CST

    The Shawshank Redemption

    by LaserPants

    Is a maudlin, overwrought piece of shit. Oh! Another "Magical Negro!" He'll teach us all about love and understandin' sho nuff!<br><br>Please. Stop.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:56 a.m. CST

    @ LaserPants

    by Lemure_v2

    Watch it again when you're older...read the novella too.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:58 a.m. CST

    Inception is Nolan's fourth best film.

    by theneonsamurai

    I liked it, a lot, but I also had almost the exact same reaction as Harry's review. People talk about it way too much. It's not that complicated or sophisticated.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:58 a.m. CST

    Harry - your site is going to shit

    by coconutgroves

    Look at the content you are putting out? You didn't review Inception but reviewed this POS? Wow, another Behind the Scene Image of the Day! Where is the Mad Men talk back? True Blood? Your site is going downhill fast. There are much better alternatives out there.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10 a.m. CST

    This site is just a fanzine that get's it's founder

    by Samuel Fulmer

    freebies and I'm guessing some amount of money. That's how I've thought of it now for the past 6 years, so if you go in with that attitude, even the dumbest opinions on a film make a whole lot more sense. I take the reviews on here about as seriously as I take Armond White's reviews.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10 a.m. CST

    How...

    by windomearle39

    The he'll did we end up on the subject of Shawshank? Besides everyone knows that the best film ever, ever, ever is The Relic.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10 a.m. CST

    No Thanks, I'm Plenty Old

    by LaserPants

    And experience has shown me that I don't like racism. Especially racism disguised as it's opposite.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:01 a.m. CST

    these talkback need a moderator

    by vin_diggler

    to keep everyone on point. We went from Inception to Dark Knight to Shutter Island to Shawshank. Shawshank!? Are you fucking kidding me? You guys are all over the map. Does anyone have any info on Piranha? Is it worth the money to see it in 3D?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:01 a.m. CST

    Actually rewatching Shawshank recently

    by Samuel Fulmer

    Made me realize that really wasn't as good as I remembered it being. And no, I didn't fall asleep during the viewing either.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:02 a.m. CST

    fuck moderators

    by savagedave

    If talkback ever got moderated it would kill AICN.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:02 a.m. CST

    ya know something

    by jolliff89

    harry sure talks about beating off a lot, maybe too much.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:03 a.m. CST

    Shawshank Came Up Cause It's A Piece Of Shit

    by LaserPants

    that many affluent white people think is brilliant. I mean, how could they not? It shows a "Magical Negro" helping a white man overcome his considerable burden. That's what they're here for right? Redeeming white dudes and, like, singin' n' dancin'? <br><br>But I LOVE it when white people, usually affluent, upper-middle class types, passionately defend it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:03 a.m. CST

    vin_diggler-It's because of Harry's IMDB mention

    by Samuel Fulmer

    Where he said he was upset about how Inception is number 3, and I mentioned I think it's more of a shame that Shawshank is number one on there since eventually Inception's ranking will go down.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:04 a.m. CST

    IMDB top 100 is shit, and everyone knows it

    by savagedave

    I wouldn't get worked up over it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:05 a.m. CST

    Samual fulmer.....I would agree with you about

    by southafricanguy

    Benjamin Button, I too found that film extremely overrated, and frankly one of Finchers weakest efforts. I still have no idea why it was considered good, but I have to strongly disagree with you about LOTR, its one of the truly great trilogies, and very rewatchable imho. And city of god was fucking amazing as far as im concerned, but to each their own I guess...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:05 a.m. CST

    Melon.

    by Le Vicious Fishus

    HARRY: "I used to punch a hole in a melon and put it in a microwave for 2 minutes - and then fuck that. Fucking amazing feeling - and a great snack afterwards."<BR><BR>Ok, that was funny. And phenomenally gross. Well done.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:06 a.m. CST

    Shawshank

    by Le Vicious Fishus

    was just ok.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:08 a.m. CST

    southafricanguy-I'm not saying anyone should

    by Samuel Fulmer

    agree with me, I just threw my opinions out there. I know that most people don't agree with me on those films, I was hoping maybe others would throw out films like that in which they don't really care for, but everyone else loves.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:08 a.m. CST

    Hahahahahaha

    by Lemure_v2

    Man! Red's character in Shawshank could be Chinese or Mexican, the fact that he's black (Irish in the book) is irrelevant and never even touched upon in the film. And although he befriends Andy, Andy has made up his mind to escape and remain hopeful long before he buddies up with Red. If you're going to slag off a classic at least put some effort in.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:08 a.m. CST

    I don't give a shit what Harry thinks of anything frankly

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    And I'm surprised any of you do. I don't really think that you do. I find it far more likely that you're just waiting for pretty much anything Harry does so you can pounce on him for it. I don't understand why he bothers to try and explain himself.</p><p>That being said, as a journalist myself, Harry does a pretty piss-poor job in general. That's frankly why I don't understand why anyone gives a shit about his reviews. After the infamous Blade II review, his credibility was pretty much shot. I just thank God he's not showing up on TV or in movies anymore because that was really pissing me off. Texas Chainsaw Massacre is forever marred by him, something he admits himself.</p><p>Frankly Harry should just retire from all aspects of this site except collecting cash. He's not really helping anything and is a real lightning rod of criticism. Unfortunately since Moriarty left he doesn't have anyone else with any journalistic chops at all so the only real reason any of us are here is as a central hub to get a collection of OTHER site's movie news and the talkbacks which are the most amusing on the internet.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:09 a.m. CST

    I would add Moon, a clockwork orange, the

    by southafricanguy

    films of Edgar Wright, and the films of Terry Gilliam as completely baffling to me why some people go gaga for them....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:12 a.m. CST

    JOE DANTE is a genius...

    by krull rules

    INCEPTION = a really good fucking movie, but is entirely about plot, not character, except maybe Leo -- MEMENTO is just better, smaller, tighter, shorter, to the point -- Nolan will NEVER make a movie that comes anywhere close to Hitchcock and Kubrick (the masters) -- but with that said, I loved INCEPTION, now Hollywood finally has an excuse to make ORIGINAL (yes Harry I said it) cinema, not remakes and sequels, like PIRANHA 3D -- also Joe Dante is a genius, and GREMLINS is quite possibly one of the greatest underrated horror comedies EVER made -- does anybody remember Joe Dante's TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE short/remake? Joe Dante = Genius

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:12 a.m. CST

    southafricanguy-Thanks for the bravery

    by Samuel Fulmer

    Now prepare for a pack of wild douches to tell you why you are an idiot in just a few moments.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:14 a.m. CST

    Edgar Wright

    by savagedave

    I love both Shaun of the Dead and Hott Fuzz, but I'm not under any illusion that he's somehow a great director because of it. I really like Anchorman too, but I'm fucked if I can even remember who directed that.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:15 a.m. CST

    returnofthefett....exactly dude, why is everyone

    by southafricanguy

    getting so worked up about what Harry thinks? Why does it matter exactly. Harry is entitled to his opinion, and at least he isnt insulting/shouting at and trolling anyone that does like Inception. Which is more than can be said for some of the obnoxious cunts in the AICN talkbacks (looking at you transformersaplogist, Scarlettbreastmilk...et al...)

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:18 a.m. CST

    IMDB

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    Empire, Godfather 1 and 2, Star Wars, Pulp Fiction and Seven Samurai all in the top 20 not all the top 20 are winners for me but certainly has its fair share of brilliant movies and has a fair share of my top 10

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:18 a.m. CST

    So I guess black people don't like Shawshank Redemption

    by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    ...because it doesn't have Ice Cube in it? I thought they would though, since it has to do with prison. But then again, their tastes are limited and they'd just as soon rate 'Soul Plane' highly <p></p> See, the above is what I rate your idiotic, borderline racist post. Go fuck yourself. And here I wanted to bash Harry but I see you're an even bigger cunt. And I mean that in the American sense, not the hardy-har cheerio Brit fashion.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:19 a.m. CST

    SamualFulmer....I agree dude, I just meant

    by southafricanguy

    disagreeing with you in a friendly fashion. We can always agree to disagree. And frankly I dont care what anyone says, many of the obnoxious, over-opinionated douchbags you encounter here are really just cowards and overgrown children that cant handle that some people like something they dont....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:21 a.m. CST

    The best film of 1994.

    by HoboCode

    That would be Pulp Motherfucking Fiction. Ed wood was great too though. Gump blows nutsacks except for the army scenes. I still laugh my ass off.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:21 a.m. CST

    Red is magical, yet chooses to stay in prison??

    by Billyeveryteen

    That is fucked up.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:22 a.m. CST

    I had several things happen that sealed the deal with this site

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    And lest we start to believe Moriarty was a pillar of journalistic integrity, one of the last straws was with him lashing out at talkbackers for downloading movies which not only this site did to get early reviews, but was in direct contrast with the fact that this site was founded by stolen intellectual property in the form of script reviews!</p><p>And then there was the deal with The Punisher which opened the same day as Kill Bill which Harry had been hyping for several months. Harry pelted the site with negative reviews except for 1 positive one which he didn't post(I believe from Moriarty). Harry then blasted the one positive review saying that person had not seen the final cut which was a completely different film. It was OBVIOUS that was total bullshit. He then said the author was going to rewrite the review once he saw the theatrical version. That never happened.</p><p>It's no coincidence that Harry is constantly accused of reviewing films better when he has been "courted" by them. That has happened regularly. yes, sometimes he breask the mold, but only when it's completely obvious the film is crap.</p><p>A good example of this is Monkeybone, a film Harry is in. For months we heard what an amazing film that was going to be. Then, like a day or so before release when it was beyond question what a total steaming pile it was and was being universally loathed, Harry comes out and tells us that director's vision was compromised. Sorry but there is absolutely no way in HELL that movie was ever going to be more than utter shit. It's annoying, distateful, boring and above all else, completely stupid. it's pretty much Cabin Boy: The REALLY Shitty Version.</p><p>My advice to all of you is to swing by to read the talkbacks and get some centralized movie news. Don't think for a second that this place is worth anything more than that. I don't care how much they flood the main page with whole articles based on 1 old picture, this place is not making any news.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:23 a.m. CST

    "Harry is entitled to his opinion"

    by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    Wrong, not when his opinion is biased, underlined with an agenda, and/or bought out by the studios -- especially when he is webmaster of a pretty popular movie site that GOT that way because of people like us.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:24 a.m. CST

    southafricanguy-I thought you were cordial

    by Samuel Fulmer

    I just wanted to let everyone know that I didn't list those films and think that just because someone likes them I think they are wrong or stupid. Just like I would hope that would be the same response to my not really liking them very much.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:25 a.m. CST

    Remember that moment in HAUTE TENSION

    by kolchak

    when it turned out that Aja had fucking cheated the audience from the beginning? <p> That was the moment I decided I was done with him.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Who the F cums in their sock?!

    by Emit Brown

    What, are we in prison? I never once jerked off into a sock. What the F is your problem, Harry?!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:26 a.m. CST

    the target audience: Nerds angry at hot women

    by Redmond

    It's pretty much 90 minutes of beautiful women flashing their beauties then getting ripped apart. I guess that's the visceral kick.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:27 a.m. CST

    Harley Davidson and The Marlboro Man

    by Samuel Fulmer

    What's the quote, "Better to be dead and cool than alive and uncool."

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:27 a.m. CST

    CHOPPAH

    by HoboCode

    I pretty much hate you but props to you sir for your love of Natty Gan.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:29 a.m. CST

    SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    by LaserPants

    You seem VERY confused. Perhaps a "Magical Negro" can help you? Watch out for those "Scary Negros" though!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:29 a.m. CST

    i can see why harry wasn't that impressed with inception...

    by iwasredempted

    i fall in the same camp as krull and onesamurai. i liked the movie a lot. it was rather clever and a lot better then most of the garbage dumped out there. but it's far from a masterpiece that some seem to think it is. it's not a movie i am going to run out and buy when it comes out on dvd.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:31 a.m. CST

    Lemure_v2

    by LaserPants

    Never touched on in the film?!?!? HAHAHAHAHA! Yeeeaaaaaaah, except for the fact that the dude is black. Lemme guess, you're a white guy, upper middle class, from the suburbs? It's okay, man, a Magical Negro might redeem you too with his "Negro Wisdom!" Hahahahahahahah! Douche.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:37 a.m. CST

    Yay for Grade School Drama!

    by Elwood Blues

    That's pretty much what this talk back is. Oh the big man didn't like my favorite movie of the year... I'm so bothered he didn't love it too that I'm going to try to justify my tears by criticizing the way your review was written... Sigh, pretty silly. Harry wasn't big on Inception. He loved tits and gore in Piranha. Big deal. You don't need Harry to justify your love or hate for movies. Harry hit it right on the mark when he said just care about what brings you enjoyment, sounds like he learned not letting what other critics say bother him long ago. Harry, I agree with you maybe 50% of the time, but respect your sometimes irrational love or hate for a movie because it's your unfiltered, raw opinion. Which is a nice break from the more carefully written, well-thought out reviews that conversely lack Harry's raw energy.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:38 a.m. CST

    So when blacks get good roles, they're

    by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:40 a.m. CST

    So when blacks get good roles, they're "magical negroes"?

    by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    When they're not cast, they whine and bitch about racism in Hollywood. You morons will whine about anything.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:41 a.m. CST

    Eli Roth

    by Miss 45

    Oh God, just get a room already you two. Pathetic. Gee, I wonder how Harry's going to like his Exorcism movie?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:42 a.m. CST

    Whoever thought you'd live to see the day

    by savagedave

    When film geeks complained on internet about tits in films?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:45 a.m. CST

    @ LaserPants...

    by Lemure_v2

    The fact that you called me a "douche" shows you're not yet old enough to appreciate a film like Shawshank. READ THE BOOK! The character is only black in the film because Darabont wanted Freeman BECAUSE he felt he'd do the character justice, NOT because he wanted the character to be black. And no, I'm not from "the suburbs" or even the US.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:46 a.m. CST

    Too bad. Natty Gan is great.

    by HoboCode

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:46 a.m. CST

    This all clearly means that

    by Seph_J

    Stephen King is racist because he didn't write the character as being black.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:46 a.m. CST

    GOT to love talkbacks....

    by Lemure_v2

    We go from Piranha 3D to bashing Harry and now we're on racism. I'm sure there's an awesome novel in here somewhere.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:47 a.m. CST

    That review left me depressed, because...

    by Royston Lodge

    ...I couldn't help dwelling on the fact that Laurence Olivier never had the opportunity to judge a wet t-shirt contest.<p> THAT'S JUST WRONG!!! The poor man. The poor, understimulated man.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:57 a.m. CST

    I really don't get why people here

    by Vindibudd

    get all irritated by reviews that Harry does. Just read his reviews and match them up with yours and then you can gauge what you'll like on average by what he says. He doesn't have to agree with you, in fact he almost never agrees with me. A Talkback flamewar is a total waste of time. Make your own site.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:58 a.m. CST

    Lemure_v2, laser is obviously trolling...

    by iwasredempted

    don't let him bait you man. they cast freeman the great actor. not freeman the great black actor.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:59 a.m. CST

    Shawshank is not the best film of all time

    by Drsambeckett1984

    It's a well acted prison melodrama, its nothing more than that, I don't know what IS the best film of all time but it aint Shawshank. I wouldnt place it in my top 100

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:59 a.m. CST

    Vindibudd

    by Seph_J

    that'e because you are just better than everbody else.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:59 a.m. CST

    yer mama: You're right.

    by ColonelFatheart

    And I wouldn't have it any other way. <p>Sex and death, sex and death. That's life.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:01 a.m. CST

    To be honest...

    by Lemure_v2

    there is no such thing as "The Greatest Film Of All Time" - only people's favourites.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:01 a.m. CST

    Wait a minute..Harry would fuck a melon

    by skimn

    then EAT it?? "I used to punch a hole in a melon and put it in a microwave for 2 minutes - and then fuck that. Fucking amazing feeling - and a great snack afterwards." WTF!!??

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:03 a.m. CST

    Yes, PULP FICTION is the best film I've seen from 94.

    by ColonelFatheart

    I know it's somewhat fashionable to dislike it, and I know there are plenty of folks who are genuinely indifferent toward it, but that's one of the few movies I can watch again and again and again without getting tired of it. It's almost on a GOODFELLAS level of re-watchability for me, and it's also endlessly aesthetically interesting, both from a cinematic and a narrative point of view. <p>ED WOOD is right behind it. Its greatness makes me hate Tim Burton more and more for each new soulless Hot Topic trinket he turns out year after year. NATURAL BORN KILLERS is another one worth revisiting every now and again. SHAWSHANK's great, too, don't get me wrong. As characters in TRUE ROMANCE would say, "Good fuckin' movie."

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:08 a.m. CST

    Skimm....yes indeed, Harry just admitted

    by southafricanguy

    to fucking a warmed up melon for everyone to see. Harry, big guy, I think that qaulifies as an overshare....but maybe thats just me....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:08 a.m. CST

    imdb top 250...any list which

    by savagedave

    contains Pirates of the Caribbean but not The Man who Would Be King is basically dead to me.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:11 a.m. CST

    No, he said someone else admitted to it

    by savagedave

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:12 a.m. CST

    yeah harry fucked a melon

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    but he wouldn't have eaten it..... its fruit

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:14 a.m. CST

    Colonelfatheart......hey dude, whats up? Dont

    by southafricanguy

    even get me started on whats become of Burton, and that piece of trash Alice in Wonderland. I recently watched it on DVD, and to say I was dumbstruck would be putting it mildly. I literally could not believe how bad it was. It must be the ugliest designed film I have ever seen, the lead actress could nt act to save her fucking life, the story was not bad, it was non-existant, even Johnny Depp was crap for fucks sake! It was actually worse than TF2...yeah, thats right, I said it. Burton has fallen so far that hes outcrapping Bay....

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:15 a.m. CST

    Miyamoto...perhaps if it had been a steak, or

    by southafricanguy

    a full roast chicken?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:16 a.m. CST

    Oh, fuck the IMDB list guys, how about you

    by southafricanguy

    just stick to your top 100 list, and leave it at that?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:18 a.m. CST

    Also makes me think, does Yoko do your laundry

    by skimn

    ..with a giant pair of tongs, or in a haz-mat suit?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:21 a.m. CST

    Harry & AICN jumped the shark a long time ago

    by IAmLegolas

    If you are still coming here for the "reviews" then it's your own damn fault. The reason to come here is these very entertaining talkbacks. Like a previous poster mention, if Harry shut them down, this site would fall overnight.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:32 a.m. CST

    pass.

    by cyberskunk

    This sounds creepy from the description. Maybe more creepy than the movie intends to be. "Lots of girls in bikinis in a wet T-shirt contest! Yay! ... Now they're being eaten alive in a bloody frenzy! Yay!" I don't imagine the audience is really meant to applaud this, but... eh.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:33 a.m. CST

    Seph J, Cryosleep etc.

    by The_King_of_AICN

    Why do you fucking care so much about his Inception review? If you weren't happy with it, you call him an asshole and vow to never read his stuff again. Yet you keep coming back and coming back, I wonder why since you obviously don't respect his opinion. <p> I want an answer, why do you give a shit? And start on a self righteous whinge about how he owes it to the people who visit his site....he doesn't owe us shit! He writes about films from his own experiences, tastes, likes, dislikes, moods, expectations....this has been clear for fucking years. Why would you keep coming back to someone who's opinions you don't agree with? Find another reviewer who is closer to your tastes and read their shit, stop coming back continually and whining about how his opinions are meaningless because he won't change his opinions or style to fit YOUR tastes...it's fucking retarded in the extreme.<P> He didn't like Inception as much as you....so fucking what? He seemed to enjoy this dumb as shit monster movie more....and? He's already explained his position, frankly his position was clear years ago after he preached undying love for Godzilla....I utterly fail to see the need you dick heads have to keep bitching and whining at the man because he doesn't share your particular view on film. He owes you FUCK ALL, you are the fucking cunts that keep coming back on HIS site and talking shit like he owes you something. Delete the bookmark, forget the address, and find somewhere else to get your perspective on film. Somewhere that'll make you happy instead of constantly harping on about what a miserable job you feel the guy is doing when he's only writing about what he loves in his own way. <p> I expect to see none of your fucking usernames on any future talkbacks as only complete cunts would keep coming back to whine their arses off about shit that only THEY have the power to change.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:34 a.m. CST

    Also, piranhas smell like

    by shiekybaby

    pussy

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:35 a.m. CST

    EPIC

    by earl of sandwich

    If I hear that word ONE MORE FUCKING TIME, I'm gonna kill someone. So goddam annoying. It's everywhere now, even goddam car commercials. I blame you Scott Pilgrim!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:38 a.m. CST

    by tronknotts

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:39 a.m. CST

    I'd be more up in arms

    by Samuel Fulmer

    Over the DVD "reviews." Other they are extrememly vague (like saying "it's a new cut" of a film but not going into detail what is new) or praising a crap Blu-Ray transfer (The new Predator Blu-Ray!!!) just because it's Blu-Ray! I think it's a different story when you have someone reviewing dvds who gets them for free that doesn't really have the eyes to tell what a good transfer is that may influence someone to plop down 15-50 dollars on a single DVD or set than giving an opinion on something currently in movie theaters.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:40 a.m. CST

    But that's why I go to

    by Samuel Fulmer

    DVD Beaver, Digital Bits, and DVD Town for real DVD reviews.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:41 a.m. CST

    @ The King of AICN

    by Lemure_v2

    I agree with you 100%, but you're wasting your breath.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:41 a.m. CST

    Apologies to Seph J

    by The_King_of_AICN

    I've read back and you weren't too bad actually, that cunt Executer was far worse.......still whining over nothing though. <p> I fell asleep during Godfather years ago, still haven't seen it and have no desire to either, at least Harry watched Inception again, I can't be arsed with Godfather.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:42 a.m. CST

    Piranah 3-D really just sounds like

    by Samuel Fulmer

    A campy half hearted nudie cutie that's in 3-D. I guess if that's the type of film you would want to watch, that's what I'm gathering from reviews.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:42 a.m. CST

    @ Return_of_Fett

    by tronknotts

    Really judgemental and annoying rant. You're a good writer, so I kept reading, but by the end, I was totally irritated by your snobby and condescending tone. Clearly you're annoyed that AICN isn't what you want it to be, and likely your jealous that whatever writing you do isn't as well read as AICN. Annoying.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:44 a.m. CST

    @ The king of AICN

    by Lemure_v2

    Go back and watch Godfather. It's a fantastic film but you MUST be in the right frame of mind to slowly appreciate it. Can't stress that enough!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:45 a.m. CST

    Do Eli Roth and Quentin just sit around

    by The_Ritty

    in hotel rooms doing coke and sucking each other off. The two worst filmmakers out there... Eli Roth please die so Quentin can be free of you and make enjoyable movies again.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:47 a.m. CST

    Bunch of newbies here

    by catlettuce4

    Every year (at least) there's some movie that Harry reviews which ruins the last of his credibility, and that will be used to judge him against from now on. It's been happening for over a decade. Yawwwnnn...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:50 a.m. CST

    southafricanguy: Hey man!

    by ColonelFatheart

    Fucking Burton. The guy made several movies that are part of my personal cultural language, and now he's just churning out crap. No, I didn't like SWEENEY TODD, either, and I like that musical. How could Burton and that musical together bore me like it did?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:52 a.m. CST

    The_Ritty

    by kolchak

    Tarantino is one of the worst filmmakers around? Dude. You're in a Piranha 3D talkback.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:53 a.m. CST

    And here's a tip

    by catlettuce4

    Movie reviewers are never right or wrong. They are giving you an opinion. And if Harry's opinions aren't the same as yours, he is still useful as a reviewer, because once you get to know him, understand where he's coming from and what he likes/dislikes, you can gauge what you'll think about a film based on his opinions. That's the same with any critic, too. And since AICN has always been about what Harry likes or deems worthy to share with people, it is really not the same as other "news" sites, and cannot really be held accountable for being up to the minute or covering every scrap of news or every film. The site and Harry are really intertwined. If you can't see that, or don't like that, then why do you come here? There are tons of specialized film sites that DO give you what you seem to want from AICN.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Tim Burton.

    by HoboCode

    Totally agree Fatheart. Every time I watch Ed Wood I'm like, what the fuck happened to the guy that directed this film? Or Edward Scissorhands? Not to say I haven't somewhat enjoyed mo vies of his since. I actually find Charlie and the Chocolate Factory quite humorous and Sweeney Todd was ok even if I'm getting tired of musicals. Now I can't fully blame Burton for Apes since he came late into the game, but Alice in Wonderland was phoned in garbage. Big Fish, for all it's hype and praise, I found utterly horrendous. Mars Attacks! was simply idiotic. Sleepy Hollow started off good and fell flat on its face. The Batman films and Pee Wee were ok. But none of these films are even remotely as poignant or finely-crafted as Ed Wood. I keep waiting for him to surpass that film but he just seems to get more wildly inconsistent with age.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:56 a.m. CST

    "Eli Roth ,giggle"

    by liljuniorbrown

    How many times did you "giggle" during this one Harry? Did you jerk off with Eli while you two watched underage porn or was it torture porn?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:56 a.m. CST

    But forget Burton. As for PIRANHA 3D, yeah I'm intrigued.

    by ColonelFatheart

    I'm sure it'll be shit, but just as long as it's good shit, I'll be fine with it. Sure, it may not be as good as INCEPTION, but there's a chance I'll enjoy it more. For the record, my problems with INCEPTION are similar to Harry's, although I think I "liked" it more.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, noon CST

    The_Ritty

    by HoboCode

    I can see someone not liking Death Proof (although I loved it) but you didn't like Kill Bill or Inglorious Basterds? They are masterpieces. By the way, IMDB is reporting KB: Volume 3 is scheduled for 2014. Is there any validity to this and if so what it would be about. Seems like an atrocious idea. Bill is fucking dead after all.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:03 p.m. CST

    HoboCode

    by ColonelFatheart

    ED WOOD was about as personal and heartfelt a movie a filmmaker can make. The man is capable of greatness, I just wonder if he's found too much financial joy in being pigeonholed. "Tim Burton" is no longer a filmmaker. "Tim Burton" is a brand, a style, a product, a clothing line, a consumerist aesthetic. Now, I understand art and commerce rely on each other, but you'd think Burton would translate his commercial clout into projects that at least feel like he had worked on them with passion instead of living up to the assumptions and expectations of the marketplace. Say what you will about AVATAR, but it feels like Jim Cameron poured his heart and soul into it. Nolan, too, finds a way to balance his personal passions with commercial realities.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:05 p.m. CST

    And Hobo, re: Tarantino, agreed.

    by ColonelFatheart

    Tarantino has been fairly consistent in his greatness, as far as I'm concerned. I merely liked DEATH PROOF, though, and if it weren't for the setpieces I would have probably snoozed like Harry at an INCEPTION screening.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:08 p.m. CST

    LOL@Magical Negro

    by Stalkeye

    Shit, I never thought of Freeman's charcter to that extent, however there may be a hint of "Uncle Tomfoolery" there but not to the extent of being offended.Nothing tops Will Smith's legend of Bagger vance (man, what fucker came up with that one?) and then there's always Jar-jar Binks. The biggest 'tom since whoopi goldberg.<p>Oh, and Sierratangofoxtrotuniform: Once again, Shut De Fuck Up.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:12 p.m. CST

    Death Proof

    by Samuel Fulmer

    I actually dislike it as part of Grindhouse (a real slow down from the hectic Planet Terror/maybe they should've flipped the order), but like it in the extended standalone version.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:15 p.m. CST

    Harry, regardless of my opinion on

    by BlaGyver

    Your Inception review, props for addressing some of the complaints. That is setting yourself up for ten times the hating and kinda risky. I admire that you stuck to your review and didn't make excuses for it. No matter how much some of your reviews piss me off or how greatly my opinion on some movies may differ from yours, your conviction is something I admire. Cheers bud.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:16 p.m. CST

    I'm not seeing

    by windomearle39

    A lot of love for The Relic. We will never get a sequel at this rate and Tom needs the work. Badly.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:18 p.m. CST

    ....how the fuck

    by BlaGyver

    is Red a "magical negro"? He helps Andy escape without even fuckking knowing he's doing it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:19 p.m. CST

    King of AICN

    by Seph_J

    It's a good job I scroll before I troll

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:22 p.m. CST

    Maybe Red was magical because

    by Samuel Fulmer

    Unlike in a real life prison situation, he was friends with Andy and didn't make him his ho.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:26 p.m. CST

    vin_diggler & Moderators for Talkbacks....

    by MJs_Cold_Dead_Pale_Corpse

    I should cut out your heart for even suggesting that. Look at what "Moderators" did to the AICN chat room. It's always the same 17 fags with the same moderators/nazis banning people to satisfy their nerd power hunger.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:28 p.m. CST

    Grindhouse

    by HoboCode

    Admittedly I never saw it in theaters. I watched the extended versions of both separately on DVD, and watched that way Death Proof is vastly superior to Planet Terror in my opinion. But I can see how if you watch DP after PT in a theater one after the other that DP could be a let down.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:31 p.m. CST

    Ozymandias and the rest of the AICN chat moderators ....

    by MJs_Cold_Dead_Pale_Corpse

    are convicted pedophiles. Harry gave Ozy that room as a favor since they served in 'Nam together.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:32 p.m. CST

    Just when you thought it was safe to go back into AICN

    by workshed

    ...BLADE II Syndrome strikes again. Why isn't Harry skinny as fuck with all that wanking..? And surely Yoko gets in on the action now and again.?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:34 p.m. CST

    Now people who read "Famous Monsters"

    by Snappy Cumback

    ...will realize the person in charge of that will come to this site, read about how the host beats off into his socks while watching titty horror flicks and give up on your sorry ass. Way to go, Harry.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:34 p.m. CST

    Piranahs eating Porn Stars!!!!!

    by Jesus

    Can't agree with Harry on Expendables but Piranah was pretty fucking great. The attack on the wet t-shirt contest is amazing but what really sold it for me was seeing one of my all time favorite porn actresses bloodied and legless floating on a para-sail. Smoke a fat blunt and wash it down with some High Gravity beer and you wont be disappointed. Great fun. Also do un to others as you would have done to your...and all that. I'm out.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:34 p.m. CST

    I came home from work to see my kids watching

    by HapaPapa72

    Burton's Alice in Wonderland. Of course I got there just in time to see The Mad Hatter's weird CGI dance number at the end. So painful. You think Nolan will ever sink as low as Tim Burton has? And anyone know if Waking Sleeping Beauty is on DVD yet?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:41 p.m. CST

    Stalkeye

    by SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    Once again? Ummmm ok. Go shoot yourself.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:43 p.m. CST

    Now that's the kind of headline we won't see on FM.com!

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    Well, I hope not anyway. lol

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 12:45 p.m. CST

    And Harry, people likely wouldn't...

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    get so pissed off if you didn't root every single review you write in your childhood. I don't know what the fuck it is in your head that makes you do that, but it annoys the hell out of us. And this time you're wistfully remembering whacking off and stuffing that into a movie review. Just sayin'.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1 p.m. CST

    Mad Hatter Dance

    by IAmLegolas

    Holy shit is that awful. I skipped the movie, but I went on YouTube just now to check this out. How Johnny Depp isn't embarassed beyond belief....

  • ... which makes it sound like someone other than Harry is jerking off into a sock, while thinking of a high school aged Harry Knowles watching Piranha 3D.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:02 p.m. CST

    The reason IMDB has Shawshank Redemption at #1

    by moondoggy2u

    Is the same reason the color white is the most popular color of automobile. Oh sure, most people have a favorite color (usually red, blue or black), but white is what most people will settle for. <p>Same thing with Shawshank Redemption. Its a good movie. Hell, its a damned good movie. And while it may not be great, I know of almost nobody who hates it and almost everyone thinks its good. Not great, damned good. <p>Welcome to the world of popularity contests. ;)

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:02 p.m. CST

    Make that "1st to 3rd Person"

    by MrBook

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:05 p.m. CST

    CHOPPAH

    by HoboCode

    I never even seen The Punisher.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:05 p.m. CST

    Actually... "3rd to 1st Person"

    by MrBook

    Jesus, I'm tired.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:09 p.m. CST

    I'm not a journalist by the way.

    by HoboCode

    So why would I be considered a "pillar of journalistic integrity." It was my "final straw" that I simply think people should pay for copyrighted material rather than steal it from the Internet? A.) It obviously was not my final straw, and B.) you're a huge douche who seems to have me confused with someone else.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:13 p.m. CST

    HARRY KNOWLES PSYCHOLOGICAL PROFILE BY CTM…..

    by CreationistTechnophobicManiacs

    He’s like that kid you knew in grade school who was a spoiled little puke that LOVED wrestling and didn’t seem to have all his dogs barking. You could talk with him but there was something missing in his personality. A lack of depth. Harry Knowles is nothing but raw id which is described as such; “The id (concept originated by Sigmund Freud) comprises the unorganized part of the personality structure that contains the basic drives. The id acts according to the "pleasure principle", seeking to avoid pain or unpleasure aroused by increases in instinctual tension”. The “Pleasure Principle” is “a psychoanalytic concept, originated by Sigmund Freud. The pleasure principle states that people seek pleasure and avoid pain, i.e., people seek to satisfy biological and psychological needs.”<br> <br>This basically states that Harry has always been a psychologically damaged person in evidence of the fact that he has always been a morbidly obese fat bastard. This is probably as a result of his upbringing by parents who allowed their child to live in a fantasy dream world where he was able to indulge in movies and food in place of real goals that require actual effort such as academics and physical fitness. This is because he never developed a Reality Principle which is “is a psychoanalytic concept (also originated by Sigmund Freud) that compels one to defer instant gratification when necessary because of the obstacles of reality. It is the governing principle of the ego and stands in opposition to the pleasure principle of the id.” Furthermore, “The id rules early life, but as one matures, one begins to learn the need sometimes to endure pain and to defer gratification because of the exigencies and obstacles of reality. In Freud's words, ‘an ego thus educated has become reasonable; it no longer lets itself be governed by the pleasure principle, but obeys the reality principle, which also at bottom seeks to obtain pleasure, but pleasure which is assured through taking account of reality, even though it is pleasure postponed and diminished’".<br> <br>This analysis perfectly describes why Knowles hasn’t reviewed Inception while giving Stallone a blowjob over The Expendables, besides Harry’s obvious corruptibility which helps feed his id as it provides him with the instant gratification of pweasants, freebies and free screenings. Inception is a movie that forces you to work. It makes you think where as The Expendables is cinematic junk food and thus the reason why Harry gobbles it up like the greedy man-child he is while shunning the mental treadmill of Inception.”<br> <br>I would have thought that his recent near death experience would have , maybe, matured Knowles but it’s obvious that he has learned nothing, will learn nothing and is doomed to live out the rest of his (probably short) life indulging himself as he always has. Harry lacks the self-awareness to realize that, although he may have fed his immediate appetites, he has denied himself a truly satisfying life of pleasures that are all the more sweeter because they are hard earned.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Shue gets nekkid in LINK

    by ShiftyEyedDog2

    an early early career movie about an ape. but she shows off those beautiful tittays

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:18 p.m. CST

    Harry's enthusiasm for Piranha seems to be well-founded

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    It's at 83% on the tomatometer, which is pretty fucking unheard of for a schlocky horror film.</p><p>Here's the opening paragraph for the ASSOCIATED PRESS review(!!!!!):</p><p>"Mere words cannot describe how awesomely gnarly "Piranha 3D" is, how hugely entertaining, and how urgently you must get yourself to the theater to see it. Like, now."</p><p>I don't know how you guys can't be impressed with these kind of raves by the mainstream media for a little 3D-converted horror movie about carniverous fish eating porn stars in a boob storm! You HAVE to admit, that's one fuck of a feat!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:22 p.m. CST

    Laserpants

    by TheNewDirector

    Have you seen the Expendables yet you manless fuck.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:27 p.m. CST

    THE TRUTH HURTS DOESN'T IT KNOWLES?

    by CreationistTechnophobicManiacs

    Some people might feel sorry for you because you're a fat-shit-ginger-fuck. But I don't and it's because you are a craven, self serving, morbidly obese piece of fucking shit simpleton and you have been your whole life. You're also a disgusting glutton who will suck anyone's cock as long as it comes with something you want. This is why you're a 500 pound fucking toxic waste dump of a human being with Twinkie filling where your soul should be. Is it to much to fucking ask that YOU DON'T LIE TO US because you're being paid off with pwesants, freebies and screenings by your buddies? I guess it's pointless to ask if you understand what the word "integrity" means when you’re physical appearance says everything anyone ever needs to know about you. You’re a steaming pile of shit disguised as a nauseating tub of lard.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:28 p.m. CST

    Expendables...

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    I saw it and unfortunately I had a similar reaction to most. It was just ok. Some of Sly's humor is just way off and is more awkward than funny.</p><p>Unlike some others I didn't feel that it slowed down at all in the middle. In fact, that's probably the part I liked best. This is due in large part to the last half hour being so fucking dark and choppily edited I could barely tell what was happening.</p><p>But let me make clear that I liked it. I loved that like all his films, Stallone injected heart into it. i wish he would trust that instinct even more because that's what makes his work special and it always has been. You don't rewatch Rocky because of the fight scenes, you watch it because Rocky Balboa is all heart.</p><p>It seems to have done quite well at the box office so I really hope it gets a sequel because I'd love to see where Sly takes it. Hopefully Arny and Willis can have bigger roles next time.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:29 p.m. CST

    The Shawshank Redemption ...

    by JackGraham

    is one of the best films ever made. there is a reason why it continually tops polls and best ever lists. there are many who don't rate it, just like there are mnay who don't rate Citizen Kane. The point is the people who love Shawshank way way way outnumber the people who don't. that's why it comfortably sits on top of IMDB'S list. I personally love Shawshank and I am pleased to see it's still regarded as the masterpiece that it is.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:29 p.m. CST

    And..

    by TheNewDirector

    Inception isn't the end all be all movie either, that would belong to Heat

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:30 p.m. CST

    Jesus post

    by shiekybaby

    was awesome. From now on whenever someone asks me why I smoke blunts before going to movies, I can say...because Jesus told me to.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:30 p.m. CST

    Jesus post

    by shiekybaby

    was awesome. From now on whenever someone asks me why I smoke blunts before going to movies, I can say...because Jesus told me to.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:31 p.m. CST

    Laserpants

    by TheNewDirector

    Hates Shawshank cause of a "magical negro"? Wtf are you talking about? I'm guessing your the one those people who love the movie Crash.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:31 p.m. CST

    And sorry for double posting

    by shiekybaby

    I just smoked a blunt and I am very stoned, Jesus told me to.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:35 p.m. CST

    I give it a day

    by BlaGyver

    before the AICN username "RedTheMagicalNegro" pops up.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:38 p.m. CST

    Gianna Michaels

    by BlaGyver

    is apparently in this. That's my ass in a seat.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:38 p.m. CST

    magical negro? erm that was Green mile ...

    by JackGraham

    there wasnt anything magical about red in shawshank, jeez, its shawshank redemption, not the shawshanks apprentice.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:38 p.m. CST

    And as far as Shawshank goes...

    by shiekybaby

    It sits atop the IMDB meter, and is insanely popular, because it IS great. I think the color white analogy is WAY off! If anything, this movie is not your normal piece of cinema. It's dark, layered, slow paced in points, and has alot more with characters and emotions than action and plot twists. I love Godfather, Citizen Kane, Goodfellas, LOTR, etc. but not like Shawshank. It has been my favorite movie since the first time I saw it and I don't see that changing anytime soon.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:40 p.m. CST

    Haha TBers are losers

    by andrew coleman

    So when TF2 gets bashed people go on the defense "Can't you just have fun at the movies?" or "I just want explosions and tits!". But then he claims this movie is not good but is fun to watch and you people go fucking crazy? So I have now figured out these types of TBErs. You can never be happy and your just flaming d-bags who have no lives. The hate is simple and clear, you have done nothing with your lives so you take your hate out on Harry who loves his life talking about movies. Go fuck yourselves and go cry about how Inception isn't getting the praise it deserves while I'll laugh my ass off in Piranha 3D.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:42 p.m. CST

    Fuckin' EWWW dude!

    by JT Kirk

    C'mon.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:47 p.m. CST

    SierraTangoFoxtrotUniform

    by Stalkeye

    Um, You first. (0:'

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:48 p.m. CST

    Stars to be replaced by soiled socks in reviews

    by Samuel Fulmer

    I'm going to have to question the person whot gives Milo and Otis a four soiled socks review.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:49 p.m. CST

    Ahhhhhh Harry...

    by KabutoKoji

    "Fine - I get that it is an easy joke to make fun of a guy who had less than 12 hours sleep over a 4 day span for losing consciousness, and being PISSED ABOUT IT. Not at the movie, which I commit the horrible crime of "ONLY LIKING" on my second viewing." Aww c'mon Harry, don't be such a huge hipocrite. Acording to you, Roger Ebert commited the horrible crime of "not liking" Kick Ass on his first viewing and you certainly weren't quiet about it. See, because you're always right about movies, correct? We're just doing the same thing to you with Inception. If Roger Ebert commited a crime with Kick Ass you certainly also commited one with Inception. So what's up?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:51 p.m. CST

    JackGraham How did i fail to mention Green Mile?

    by Stalkeye

    Dayum, Clark Duncan's Character is the creme de la creme of Magical Negroes. "he killed them with their love".<p>Buahahahahah! Tomfoolery and calamity ensues.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 1:51 p.m. CST

    hahahaha... now you know how I feel, buddy

    by mrgray

    Every time I try to intelligently speak to what I find as flaws in TDK, the Nolan-frenzied masses shout me down. Makes you want to bang your head against a wall, innit?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2 p.m. CST

    Oh, SCOTTPILGRIMFAN...

    by Le Vicious Fishus

    Why has thou forsaken us?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:01 p.m. CST

    I thought...

    by axemurder

    the 3D was great, it is a lot of fun and children you dont need to get so upset by this, it is meant to be fun trash not high art. it is a real throwback spaltter movie. calm down you joyless fucks

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:03 p.m. CST

    mrgray

    by rogueleader66

    My favorite is AsimovLives. Whenever you point out a flaw in TDK, all he does is dismiss it, it's so minor it doesn't exist, it's meaningless. I find it funny how he dismisses all the flaws of TDK, yet if it's a film he hates, will nitpick at every little damn thing. It's his nature, I just find it funny.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:04 p.m. CST

    Word to Blagyver. Gianna is the para-sail chick!

    by Jesus

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:05 p.m. CST

    Found SCOTTPILGRIMFAN....

    by leo54304

    He's in a closet wondering why his god has forsaken him. Hell, maybe its a reverse rapture thing and he was the only one taken.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:06 p.m. CST

    SAG AWARD WINNING ENSEMBLE!!!

    by HelveticaConspiracy

    wow. really?! how ever in this wide world did a SAG AWARD WINNING ENSEMBLE actor of ELI ROTH'S STATURE EVER wind up as a wet t-shirt contest judge?!! maybe because he's eli roth and he has NO acting cred. he was easily the weakest part of IB. you've become such a sell-out. so, sad, harry. so, sad.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:06 p.m. CST

    Inception...

    by EZflowELBOW

    Succeeded at making dumb people feel smart. En masse. It's nothing more than a paper thin premise padded with 2 hours of gunfights, squealing tires, heavy handed exposition, explosions, and more gunfights. If Inception's "intellectual" qualities" made your brain hurt, I recommended reading something by Philip K. Dick. Or at least attempting to.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:09 p.m. CST

    EZflowELBOW

    by TheNewDirector

    Thank you, some sense around these parts.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:17 p.m. CST

    OH AND BIG FUCKING SHOCK..HERE ARE THE ADS

    by Neck_Lucas

    lol..wow Harry..its amazing you even TRY to defend yourself..

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:26 p.m. CST

    Its just astonishing...

    by Neck_Lucas

    More fucking kudos to Nolan for not pandering to your shilling bullshit Harry..thats what ALL of this is about. Nolan and the studio don't give a shit about you or you're site..and you're still feeling burned over the fake joker pics..so there arent any set visits, there arent any interviews offered, and you dont see inception ads ANYWHERE on this site..but is it any fucking coincidence AT ALL..that you see a midnight screening, write a review in one night, and the very next day Piranha ads pop up all over your website...its not even worth getting mad about anymore..you are such a fucking sellout and a tool it takes our collective breath away...Id come in a sock over a movie too if they gave me a truck full of money for my website..Its just so fucking ridiculous that you ACT like that shit has nothing to do with your reviews...like I said you are a fucking miracle Harry.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:29 p.m. CST

    I quit reading

    by Inconvenient

    after the 10th use of the word "epic". Let's get some new adjectives, nerds

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:33 p.m. CST

    EZflowELBOW, Phillip K. Dick

    by MattmanReturns

    A LOT of people have read Phillip K. Dick, myself included, and I probably enjoyed Inception all the more because of it. Appreciating Inception doesn't make me smarter or dumber than anyone else here. I do think it's a thought-provoking film that encourages discussion, which is something very few films do. Therefore, no responsible critic should dismiss it in favor of fucking Piranha 3D. Then again, Harry is not a responsible critic.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:37 p.m. CST

    EZflowELBOW

    by HoboCode

    Oh you're so much better than us. I'm in awe. <p> Not really.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:40 p.m. CST

    Where's LaserPants?

    by Lemure_v2

    I want to laugh at him for getting Shawshank mixed up with The Green Mile...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:40 p.m. CST

    I can't wait to meet Eli Roth!

    by TedKordLives

    So I can punch him in his smarmy no-talent face!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 2:56 p.m. CST

    EZFlow..what are you 50 years old?

    by Neck_Lucas

    IF Philip K. Dick is still your benchmark man you are fucking old dude.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3 p.m. CST

    Nobody has a problem when the old sage is white

    by Nerd Rage

    Everyone's cool with Obi Wan being white or Yoda being green but let the old sage be black (Red, Morpheus) and all hell breaks loose. I guess blacks aren't supposed to be old and wise. Magic must be involved.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Nothing was really "magical' about Red

    by Stalkeye

    freeman's character was mostly doing narration about his pal Andy duphrene. "magical" in the sense of uplifting and supportive, sure. but litterly?Aw hell naw, that goes to bagger vance moreso than Red.<p>Shit, some people view Obama as a "Magical" negro as if he could wipe away all the problems that had stemmed from Dubya's administration.Dream on fuckers.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:08 p.m. CST

    and, does anyone else notice the bizarre wording on the headline

    by HelveticaConspiracy

    if HARRY were in hs and p3d were on hbo... I woulda ruined a lot of socks to this. first off, terrible grammar. second, it sounds like harry wishes he could jerk off in a sock looking at the hs harry watching p3d.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:09 p.m. CST

    I prefer the reviews on cndb

    by gun_will_travel

    They are a lot more descriptive and informative when it comes to reviewing skin flicks.<p> P.S. Shue also bared it in Leaving Las Vegas.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:15 p.m. CST

    Harry's Inception "review" calls for a Picard Facepalm

    by seagrass

    Nay, it demands it! :) I do find it amusing that Harry was underwhelmed by the two best movies of the year so far (Toy Story 3 & Inception). Hmmm...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:17 p.m. CST

    I hate when reviewers talk about scenes...

    by D.Vader

    Without any context, as if we've already seen the movie and know exactly what he is referencing. That said, I look forward to this epic naked underwater ballet.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:31 p.m. CST

    Shutter Island

    by Blackhand2010

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:36 p.m. CST

    Shutter Island...

    by Blackhand2010

    Harry, you thought Shutter Island was a mindfuck? Really? Perhaps I'm a genius, but the ending was fairly obvious fairly early into the first act, and to me, as plot twists go it came across as The Devils Advocate's better directed cousin. Anyone who thought it was an originally done story would be the sort of inbred halfwit who'd like Van Helsing. Oh, wait...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:37 p.m. CST

    There's Piranha in the lake? Leave the lake.

    by Han Cholo

    The battle's over, we win, the pirahna lose by starving to death. What a horribly lame premise. <p> Same thing with that Lottery Ticket. You have the winning ticket, don't stay in the hood. Don't tell anyone, call a cab, take it to the lottery office, get your cash, take cab to the bank, deposit the fucking cash. Never go back to the hood. The battle's over. <p> What fucking idiots suggested making either of these films?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:45 p.m. CST

    About the "amounts of blood" claim

    by Alphanumeric1971

    I thought "Tokyo Gore Police" had that one sewn up?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:45 p.m. CST

    Nah, just leave the stupid people to swim the the dangerous wate

    by canvasseamonkey

    natural selection my friend

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:46 p.m. CST

    Pissed Off and Bitter...

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    Obviously you have no idea what the plot of this or the film it was based on is or you wouldn't say something so stupid. You're attempting to answer a question nobody would ask because it's completely ignorant.</p><p>Piranha don't live in lakes. They live in one river in the world, the amazon river. So people don't ask themselves the question "Are there piranhas in this lake? If there are, I shouldn't go in." The piranhas are released by an earthquake or something, then kill a bunch of people that arer already in the water.</p><p>This is how you sound: "There are sharks in the ocean? Don't go in the ocean. We win because they'll starve to death because as we all know, sharks only eat people." See how IMMENSELY retarded that sounds?</p><p>That was fun, let's try it again. "You won the lottery but grandma was there when you did so she knows? Kill the bitch and bury her in the rose garden. You win. What fucking idiot suggested making this film?"

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:47 p.m. CST

    @ Seagrass

    by Lemure_v2

    Get it right! Harry wasn't underwhelmed at Toy Story 3, he just wished Andy had hooked up with the 5 year old girl and produced babies so they could all play with the toys together. Nothing weird about that.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Shutter Island

    by Lemure_v2

    was let down by the pointless "dream sequences" that added an extra 40 minutes to the film. The book didn't need them and neither did the film - unless studios now demand CGI in every single film one way or another...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:53 p.m. CST

    You go, Harry!

    by Kremzeek

    I still don't get why people can't understand that a review for a film like Piranha has nothing to do with a film review of Inception (or any other movie not specifically made to suit the same purpose as Piranha). It's apples and oranges to the Nth degree. So, what you guys are saying is a person can ONLY review and ONLY like a certain genre of films? That's plain stupid. I love "Superbad"... but I'm not a big fan of 2001: A Space Odyssey. I'm an idiot by default, of course. But, wait, hold the phone, I LOVE the Godfather films, the Wizard of Oz... name off most classics, and I can nearly guarantee I respect and love them. So, what now? By the same logic being used to insult Harry, I'm also an idiot for liking more than one type of film, and possibly not liking some "classics". And for those same reasons, so is everyone on this TB.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:54 p.m. CST

    Oh, and I wasn't insulting anyone...

    by Kremzeek

    with my last sentence. I was merely saying, that "by that same logic" we're all idiots here. But, then again... we all probably knew and accepted that awhile ago. =)

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 3:57 p.m. CST

    @ Pissed Off And Bitter

    by Lemure_v2

    You don't really get films do you?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:01 p.m. CST

    @ dstrange

    by Lemure_v2

    I think the problem is that just about every single "professional critic" thought Inception was brilliant. A lot of people here rate Harry as King Of All That Is Film and therefore don't get why he didn't like Inception either but then raves about films like Van Helsing, xXx, Monkeybone...and other crap films. They haven't come to terms with the fact that Harry is NOT a professional film critic, merely a film lover who says whether he enjoyed a movie, rather than whether or not a movie is good.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:02 p.m. CST

    And nobody's perfect

    by Lemure_v2

    I'd rather watch Spawn than Chinatown any day.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:04 p.m. CST

    Good points, Lemure

    by Kremzeek

    I can definitely see that. That helps me see the other side a little bit. I don't agree with that line of thinking, but I suppose I can see it now. Cool. Thanks for the reply.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:06 p.m. CST

    well I got tired of waiting so

    by vin_diggler

    I decided to check out Piranha for myself. All I can say is if you wanna laugh for about thirty minutes while watching people violently get eaten by fish, then by all means this is the film for you. Unfortunatly that is the only worthwhile to see this film. The rest is garbage. The lead character is emotionless and annoying. The story is lame and constantly contradicts itself. All of the name actors really have nothing to do and aren't in the film very long. There wasn't a single character I cared about and I was hoping all of them would die in the end. The 3D is ok but most of the underwater shots are so dark you need to take the glasses off to see whats going on. All in all it's not worth the $12.00 to see it in 3D.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:10 p.m. CST

    I met Harry a few years ago

    by Binkysguy

    It was in Austin at a screening of 'Captain Blood' (Do you remember me, big guy? I'm the dude that gave you the Daredevil comics and the goofy picture of me dressed as Elvis...which I need back, by the way). Anyway, when the movie was over Harry stood there and talked with me for 10-15 minutes. He didn't have to do that. His dad was kind of hurrying him along but Harry took time out to talk with me because I was a frequent visitor to his site and appreciated it. Here's what you are all missing with your vitriol and condescending superiority...Harry is just a guy. He's just a fucking regular dude like us that really digs movies. Some of you seem to think he's supposed to wield some kind of deitic acumen about the worth of a film. NO! He fucking likes what he likes and if his likes don't always match yours...oh, well. Get the fuck over it. Bottom line is he's obviously a fun guy based on his reviews and he's definitely the kind of guy I'd hang out with...and I would if I didn't live an hour and a half from Austin. That's it. Accept that he's just a mortal like us or fuck off.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:11 p.m. CST

    This will Bomb worse than Scott Pilgrim.

    by RPLocke

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:12 p.m. CST

    Binky, well said!

    by Kremzeek

    I've never met Harry, but I think TBers are waaaaaaaaay to quick to attack him because online he's not a "real person". I loathe that mentality.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:16 p.m. CST

    if harry didnt like this...

    by emeraldboy

    why is there an ad on this saying the movie is a complete blast?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:23 p.m. CST

    BEST MOVIE OF THE SUMMER!

    by Dr. Samuel Loomis

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:39 p.m. CST

    I need to see it again without 3D. For Crystal.

    by SoylentMean

    That girl needs to be the go to girl for scenes calling for a naked lady. Holy shit.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:50 p.m. CST

    neckLucas

    by HEADGEEK

    Actually, I would have killed for INCEPTION to overwhelm me... the opposite is what happened, I was underwhelmed. The film lived up to being a tightly constructed film, immaculately shot - about a subject that I love, but I'm afraid I love Salvador Dali a bit much and when I saw in trailers Paris folding up upon itself... I was hoping we'd see something a tad more dynamic visually than a subpar ski chase. I love snow fortress flicks like WHERE EAGLES DARE or EMPIRE STRIKES BACK or ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE - and the second that I saw that snow fortress I was hoping for something extraordinary. Instead it was ok. The time expansion through the layers was more interesting than anything that was physically going on. And the film is something you can play with like a puzzle box, but like most puzzle boxes I've played with, I tend to solve them pretty quickly and move on. I'd rather play Chess or Scrabble with my nephew. <BR><BR>I love this discussion btw.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:53 p.m. CST

    I had fun watching it.

    by Stuntcock Mike

    Tits are neat.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:54 p.m. CST

    Why did Harry Name-Check Two Gay actors...

    by MST3KPIMP

    while mentioning Eli Roth. Is he trying to suggest something?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:54 p.m. CST

    Trazadone

    by HEADGEEK

    Actually, INCEPTION is a great film, that I only like. PIRANHA 3D is a borderline piece of trash cinema that is quite a bit of fun. Totally different things.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:54 p.m. CST

    and apparently her name is Riley Steele, Porn Star...

    by SoylentMean

    I'm guessing she's used to the whole "get naked when the director yells action thing". <P> Research time!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:57 p.m. CST

    Piranha 3D was a great movie! For a movie called Piranha 3D!

    by SoylentMean

    The pretty damn long attack on the partygoers is just jaw dropping SFX goodness. Shit, I think I'm gonna watch the first two films and then go see it again tomorrow. Because it was fun.<P> And because of Riley Steele.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:58 p.m. CST

    I mean Oliver and Guiness were appartly gay right?

    by MST3KPIMP

    thats was my understanding.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:59 p.m. CST

    I missed what happened to the sign holders

    by SoylentMean

    the one's that said "You're going to hell". <P> I hope they got eaten. A lot.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 4:59 p.m. CST

    So why make a joke about Gay Actors at a wet T?shirt contest?

    by MST3KPIMP

    seems like a weird thing to do...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:01 p.m. CST

    Cool

    by Cobbio

    Thanks for the review, Harry! Seems like a lot of talkbackers are giving you shit about it, but I appreciate your enthusiasm.<p> Yes, it's not classic film, but who cares? It actually sounds way better than I was expecting. Maybe I'll even go see it.<p> Keep doing your thing, Harry.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:02 p.m. CST

    Whatever happened with the Alamo Drafthouse expansion?

    by SoylentMean

    I read some stuff about they were going to be opening theaters in other parts of the country. <P> I really wish I had one here because the theaters in this area are shit. <P> I had to explain to the "ushers" at the theater today that the lights weren't on in the theater. They were like "What do you mean?"<P> I had to show one of them that it was pitch black in the theater. Such a bad movie house. <P> I want a theater where the folks running the show give a shit.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:06 p.m. CST

    The Alamo has definitely spoiled me.

    by TedKordLives

    I'm less than a mile from the theater that Harry mentions in his review. <P> So thanks for the tip, Harry! I'll be catching P-3D at the South Lamar, despite Eli Roth's (hopefully brief) appearance.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:37 p.m. CST

    deckard82

    by HEADGEEK

    No. Completely wrong. It killed me that I wasn't chiming in on INCEPTION. I get how folks just imagine that all I have to do is write about films on AICN and see movies in theater, but my reality is a bit more complicated than that. In a given day, I have meetings, phone calls and site responsibilities that take me very far from my coveted spot in a movie theater. After the Famous Monsters convention and before San Diego Comic Con - there was an enormous amount of work to just get the Famous Monsters deal in place to where we could announce at Comic Con and this was my number one priority. Also in that time, because my wife was having to take off a bit of vacation time to go to Comic Con with me, she was working crazy shifts at work, tending to get off at 9:30pm at night. For about 2 weeks with no days off. Her boss went in for an operation and as the #2 person at work, she had to cover those shifts. <BR><BR>Ordinarily, I'd just call up Dad and go with him to see INCEPTION, but he really dislikes the film - while Yoko LOVED - INCEPTION - and I'd rather see it with someone that loved it. We rewatched INCEPTION on her first day off after Comic Con. When I discovered the whole film and liked it, but still had hang ups that kept it from being my favorite Nolan film. Which is what I was at least expecting. BY THE TIME I sat down to write my thoughts on INCEPTION - I felt it was a thankless task. First off, I felt nobody would really care what I thought 3 weeks after the Tent was open for business. I also despised my opinion of the film. I could see how excited everyone was about INCEPTION - how it was the film of the summer that EVERYONE was raving about - and I knew how my "I just liked it" opinion would be torn apart. I didn't relish writing about the film, because I was that guy at the party where everything is awesome, that was gonna say, "I've been to better parties" and that guy always and without exception, SUCKS. And I knew it sucked. And I knew that my problems with the film were specific to me - and would probably hold very little resonance for the larger audience, but... writing my INCEPTION piece felt like walking a plank. But then, I've walked that plank before.... INCEPTION is one of those films that is apparently great for the mainstream - that just seems less than that for me. And you folks very much should know, I'm not saying any of you are wrong about loving INCEPTION... if you watched that Ski scene, the zero-G hallway battle and that chase sequence and it blew you away - I'm envious. I truly am. Because I couldn't think of it that way. <BR><BR>I love the passion with which y'all are angry with me about INCEPTION, but you do need to know, I don't relish my review. I didn't think it would win me any friends - even if I am making a movie with the guy that financed INCEPTION. <BR><BR>Often times I check out from the mainstream. With INCEPTION, I'm obviously in the vast minority opinion. As for not having a relationship with Christopher Nolan - I have actively avoided getting to know Nolan. Simply because I don't want to know anything about his films. I respect him tremendously as a filmmaker. LOVE that he tries to do as much as possible in camera. ADORE his love for BLADE RUNNER and FILM NOIR as a genre. I want him to continue to surprise me in the theaters - and that's why all assignments about NOLAN films - I hand over to the other editors, because I love Nolan. Which is why I'm so harsh on INSOMNIA, because it felt less than the original for me. Not so much because of Nolan's direction, but the casting. The star casting of INSOMNIA made his version seem boring to me, whereas the original with Stellan in the Pacino role - felt authentic and real to me. Nolan's felt "Hollywoodized" and that bugged me. <BR><BR>As for not talkbacking on the INCEPTION review - I just wasn't wanting to get into at that point. I suppose I'm in a much better state of mind to talk about the film now. PLUS - with my business partner headed to Mexico - he's not calling me up constantly to distract me, so I have time to participate in this talkback.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:39 p.m. CST

    TedKordLives

    by HEADGEEK

    if you don't like Eli - you're probably going to love his... exit.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:40 p.m. CST

    I FUCKING LOVE PIRANHA 3D

    by Bulldoggie

    It is the perfect summer movie

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:42 p.m. CST

    Agreed.

    by TedKordLives

    "The star casting of INSOMNIA made his version seem boring to me, whereas the original with Stellan in the Pacino role - felt authentic and real to me. Nolan's felt "Hollywoodized" and that bugged me." <P> Totally agree with that statement. Anyone with a brain that's seen the original would prefer it to Nolan's version, imo.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:44 p.m. CST

    kelly brook is in this and she's smokin hot

    by Matt Szczerba

    check her out on youtube. she was in this movie Three where she's stranded on an island with her husband and another guy. the other guy rapes her and halfway into it she likes it. it's the sexiest scene ever.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 5:48 p.m. CST

    Bulldoggie

    by HEADGEEK

    What was your favorite gag in the flick?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6 p.m. CST

    HEADGEEK- Bringing my wife to it ; )

    by Bulldoggie

    Jerry O’Connell laying on the boat was just an awe inspiring effect. I really enjoyed the total spring break girls gone wild obnoxious party experience and then seeing them all eaten by prehistoric pirahana. I mean come-on already, this is the kinda film I’ve been waiting a long time for. The underwater synchronized swimming was mesmerizing too!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:01 p.m. CST

    Harry, dude, please...

    by workshed

    ...you sure know how to dig a large hole in the ground. I know you're way more intelligent than this. I thought the ninth circle of AICN was 'Blade II' but now I realise - that was only #8.!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:02 p.m. CST

    EW gives PIRANAH a B -

    by RPLocke

    EW - Credibility show.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:03 p.m. CST

    All the best actors are probably gay

    by John_McClanes_Vest

    or packin fudge at some point in their lives. It's a camp profession after all.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:08 p.m. CST

    Piranha 3D > Deep Blue Sea, Anaconda, Lake Placid

    by Bulldoggie

    It really did feel like a balls-out Hard R Gremlins. Just fucking balls-out silly fun.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:09 p.m. CST

    Cool, thanks Harry.

    by TedKordLives

    And thanks for giving me your opinion on the Pedalbackers the other day.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:11 p.m. CST

    I get the premise of the films

    by Han Cholo

    But you live in the Hood and you win the lotto but you know grandma has a big mouth, don't tell her you won the lotto. Surprise her when you come back with a limo to pick her up. <p> Piranha don't live in lakes, they live in rivers. Yeah so I don't go into rivers that people are getting eaten alive in. Would you be that stupid? I guess so. Only thing I don't get about films is why stupid ones are made and idiots like the ones attacking me on here are defending them along with the dumbing down of American cinema. <p> Your only retort will be to tell me to go back to watching Kubrick or anime or some bullshit that I know is all you have as a final insult. Must be nice to be an anonymous asshole talking shit to people on a movie site you'd never have the balls to face in real life.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:18 p.m. CST

    My biggest problem with Inception was

    by Bulldoggie

    that it lacked 3D PIRANHAS!!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:20 p.m. CST

    Harry thanks for a better understanding of you inception review

    by harryknowlesnothingaboutfilm

    The original review came across as a ' oh that old thing? Bo-ring I am above such cinematic frippery. But I see now that maybe you respect what Nolan has done but don't LOVE what Nolan has done. We all know that your heart rules over your head when it comes to film ( which is no means a bad thing) and if you don't feel the love then so be it. It seems the geek community ( myself included) wanted to bring inception back to the village to the head geek as a prize but our chief is displeased so we all go mental finding someone to sacrifice ( and when the wailing dies down the eyes of the villagers slowly turn to their leader)..........

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:26 p.m. CST

    The Lottery movie is just the Lost episode where

    by RPLocke

    Hurley wins and has a string of bad luck.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:39 p.m. CST

    As always, RPLocke's insight is shattering.

    by TedKordLives

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:39 p.m. CST

    TedKordLives

    by RPLocke

    Says the guy who loves Piranha 3d

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:39 p.m. CST

    RPLocke, can you give me genius lessons?

    by TedKordLives

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:41 p.m. CST

    NeilMcCauleysBrother...

    by Animorganimate

    You really think Harry has to walk a WHOLE two feet for his job? I picture him never leaving his bed; with a laptop attached to his body via some sort of back-brace; and just for good measure - him washing himself with a rag-on-a-stick. Hell, maybe he even uses a broomstick to poke at things too. What do I know?! I do know this, Harry no longer has any taste in movies - except for old-as-fuck monster flicks and up-to-date jerk-off flicks. Fuck...this site USED to be cool.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:41 p.m. CST

    TedKordLives

    by RPLocke

    Thinks Insomnia was the best movie ever.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:46 p.m. CST

    So Harry your amazing review has nothing to do with the ads?

    by Neck_Lucas

    plastered all over your site?? Funny how you wont answer that question.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:48 p.m. CST

    By the way Harry...

    by Animorganimate

    OBVIOUSLY your marriage to Yoko is going GREAT, because you can't wait to see movies with titties so you can jerk-off! What's the matter Harry? Yoko got lost in the void of the folds one too many times and now she won't put out? Or was sex not part of the mail-order-bride contract?!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:51 p.m. CST

    I hope this hits video before Xmas!

    by SoylentMean

    All unrated and stuffs.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:54 p.m. CST

    "I wish I was like you, easily amused..."

    by Billyeveryteen

    Thank God that joyless fuck ate a bullet.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:57 p.m. CST

    Oh, RPLocke...

    by TedKordLives

    I love that you just make up random things to say about me. <P>I'd probably have stopped messing with you by now but you crack me up, you really do. Keep up the good work.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 6:59 p.m. CST

    RPLocke's a dummy.

    by TedKordLives

    C'mon, hit me again. Do it. No no. Do it.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:04 p.m. CST

    Harry, I now better understand...

    by ConfusedPanda

    ...why you wrote the kind of review for Inception that you did, and I just read your talkback post thinking "okay....okay....okay," which is a good thing, and I really didn't want to latch onto any one thing in the post and go "Ah, but there is where I still have a problem!" but unfortunately I did have that reaction, and it probably does relate to what you already said: that you had personal issues with the film. The thing is that you keep bringing up the ski scene to talk about how your excitement doesn't match the excitement of the movie's rabid fans, as if we're all endlessly praising the street/car/ski chases in our talkback posts. Watching you bring that up (I believe) in your original review and then in talkback posts, it's like someone saying they were a little disappointed in Casino Royale because it wasn't the unbelievable "action" movie everyone kept making it out to be; well, most people considered the action in Casino Royale to be competent, and other elements of the film were what made the film special. The same thing is true with Rocky, as another talkbacker recently discussed. Your written response to Inception is like someone saying Rocky is only okay because he/she felt the boxing scenes weren't as good as everyone was saying they are. If what you wanted out of Rocky was boxing scenes, and you saw it as strictly a boxing movie, I guess I could see your argument against it, but most people recognize that Rocky is great because, as the talkbacker said, "Rocky is all heart." To get back to the point, when I think about Inception, which I really liked, the street chase and ski chase are not the scenes that come to mind. Other than the zero-g scene, the movie's action scenes are not what linger in the mind. Just like Casino Royale, I don't really think of it as strictly an "action" movie when there is so much more than the action to sink your teeth into while watching the movie.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:05 p.m. CST

    ...Animorganimate, you're a simpleton.

    by FlickaPoo

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:09 p.m. CST

    TedLordLives

    by RPLocke

    Fucking Nolan freak.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:11 p.m. CST

    ...Panda...

    by FlickaPoo

    ..."the movie's action scenes are not what linger in the mind".<P> That's exactly right...don't you think that's a bit of a problem? I really liked INCEPTION, but the action scenes were sorta boring. By far the least interesting part of the movie...yes, the snow scene in particular. I couldn't shake the feeling that they missed a lot of the most interesting angles and possibilities with the concept.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:12 p.m. CST

    Awesome, thanks RPLocke.

    by TedKordLives

    Never fails to bring a smile to my face.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:15 p.m. CST

    TedKordLives

    by RPLocke

    Yeah, cause you're a hipster that saw Scott Pilgrim 400 times.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:19 p.m. CST

    Nice.

    by TedKordLives

    Four completely random and generic AICN insults in a row. You're on fire RPL! <P> And you're using proper grammar, which should always be commended. <P> I do have to point out that in order to have seen Scott Pilgrim 400 times in a week, I would have had to have seen it just over 57 times a day, which isn't physically possible. But don't let that stop ya, pally.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:23 p.m. CST

    ...FlickaPoo, you're a dimpleton.

    by Animorganimate

    Just because it rhymes! Seriously though...what's your issue? You gettin' all serious here on the AICN TBs? Is your life now as fulfilling as you had hoped back in your 30s?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:23 p.m. CST

    when comments go from funny to pathetic and worse

    by Miyamoto_Musashi

    a) hoping Harry will die, or wanting him to die<br />b) comments about Yoko and the mail order stuff<br />Seriously criticise Harry about his poor inception review, or how he seems to obviously give favourble reviews to his friends or people that give him stuff, but saying shit like the above makes CTM look like a reasonable guy in comparrison

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:24 p.m. CST

    mmm. fish

    by RPLocke

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:25 p.m. CST

    Flickapoo

    by ConfusedPanda

    Yes, I agree, the movie would be even better if the action scenes(besides the zero-g scene) had been better, and I'm not arguing for or against them in my post; I just wanted to state how strange it is to me that Harry refers to the action scenes (particularly the ski sequence) to show that his excitement doesn't match most of our excitement for the film. I don't think I've read a single talkback post about how brilliant the ski sequence is, so it simply shows a misunderstanding in his perception of others' excitement for the film. I wanted to clear that up.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:31 p.m. CST

    If I wanted to...

    by TedKordLives

    I could watch SCOTT PILGRIM about 84 times in one week, if I did nothing else. <P> But who'd wanna do that, besides youknowwhoFAN?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:39 p.m. CST

    I went to a Nolan movie expecting...

    by Trannyformers_Apologist

    "Heavy CGI dream worlds" <P> "Long mind-blowing action scenes with lots of CGI for crazy guns, robots, dragons, and flying unicorns that shoot rainbows. " <P> lol

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:44 p.m. CST

    ...Panda...

    by FlickaPoo

    ...I think I get what you're saying, but isn't it weird, then, that you haven't read a single post about how brilliant the ski sequence is? It's the climax of the movie...the grand finale. They spent a lot of time in the movie building up the feeling of... nobody can go down to level 3, it's impossible...yes we can...no it's impossible...oh shit, now we HAVE to...HOLY FUCK, THEY'RE GOING TO LEVEL 3!<P> If the ski scene left you cold after all that, I'd say that's a legitimate complaint.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:48 p.m. CST

    The ski sequence left ME cold...

    by TedKordLives

    I mean, it must've been freezing as fuck up on that mountain, amiright?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:48 p.m. CST

    Inception?!! I guess people would rather see Piranah

    by RPLocke

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 7:59 p.m. CST

    I'm sure the water skiing scenes in Piranha...

    by TedKordLives

    ...will leave me wet, if you catch my meaning, heh heh.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:11 p.m. CST

    Yeah Flickapoo

    by ConfusedPanda

    As I said, I really do agree with you. If you want to discuss any of the film's flaws, there you go: the ski sequence/climax. I personally liked the film enough (especially by that point) that the ski sequence didn't cause me to turn on the film, yet if someone wanted to discuss how the film wasn't perfect, that section of the film is a good place to start. I'm going to repeat my other post,and I think you got my "point" anyways, but my issue was that Harry basically said in his talkback post, "I just didn't love the movie like you guys did. I wish I thought the ski sequence was as incredible as all of you must have thought." He made that comment knowing that even the talkbackers who loved the movie didn't care much for the ski sequence. I think if he wants to criticize the film's flaws, he should be more direct about it, and not refer to the weakest sequence in the film and act like we all loved it. I can't think of an album off the top of my head that applies, but it's like a classic album having one weak song, and then a critic saying, "Sorry, I respect that all of you absolutely love (that one bad song), but I simply don't," completely ignoring the rest of the album.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:30 p.m. CST

    TedKordLives

    by RPLocke

    Are you a chick?

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:32 p.m. CST

    Killik

    by ConfusedPanda

    Okay, you got it. The movie stinks. We can all get away from our computers and go see Vampires Suck now. Life is good.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:33 p.m. CST

    ConfusedPanda

    by TallanDagwood

    I believe Harry mentioned several other issues he had with the film.<p> The Ski sequence certainly would have been one of the few scenes that lovers of the film could 'possibly' see as not being the strongest track on the album - so to speak, but I do not think it was the only issue that Harry and others - myself included, had with the film. <p> I thought it was a good, if at times boring film that built to no discernible point (because it was all probably a dream - Bobby Ewing anyone?) and had very little in the way of characterization. <p> Having said that, I am truly gratified at it's success because it shows that mainstream audiences do hunger for more than the average popcorn fare in the summer. There is nothing wrong with some occasional mindless extravaganzas - the can be quite entertaining, but they can leave you unfulfilled. Perhaps Hollywood will take a queue from the success of Inception and greenlight other such movies for summer entertainment. <p> If so, then Nolan will certainly have achieved an Inception worthy of respect.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:36 p.m. CST

    TallanDagwood

    by ConfusedPanda

    Good post. Well said.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:39 p.m. CST

    Pissed Of and Bitter...THEY. WERE. ALREADY. IN. THE. WATER!

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    What part of that don't you fucking understand? At no point does someone see piranhas in the water and then jump in you fucking moron! that's what i meant by saying you were answering a question that nobody would ask because it's so FUCKING IGNORANT!</p><p>"DUUUUUH....I THINK I WILL JUMP IN WITH THE MAN-EATING FISH. DUUUUUUH!"</p><p>DOESN'T HAPPEN MORON!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:40 p.m. CST

    Ruining socks???

    by HarryKnowlesNonExistentInceptionReview

    Harry, why the fuck do you think they invented Kleenex? Geez...

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:41 p.m. CST

    BTW, thanks for reviewing Inception

    by HarryKnowlesNonExistentInceptionReview

    Shouldn't have waited so long, tho.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:45 p.m. CST

    PIRANHA 3D DELIVERS THE GOODS

    by Bulldoggie

    feels good to say after so long . . .

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:51 p.m. CST

    Thanks, ConfusedPanda

    by TallanDagwood

    Cheers

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:53 p.m. CST

    WTF?

    by ZodNotGod

    Why would anyone jerk off in a sock? Let it shoot freely I say!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 8:55 p.m. CST

    Piranha was good by the way

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    We've sort of been led to believe is this boob-filled laughfest....and it's not that at all. It's a pretty straight-forward horror film. A really good one too.</p><p>Thern't THAT many naked breasts folks. I think we see the breasts of maybe 5 girls, mostly in quick cuts. The one exception is the underwater "ballet" sequence which is pretty awesome.</p><p>As for teh gallows humor, it's certainly there, but nowhere near as much as Gremlins for example. In fact this idea that the fish were being comical like the Gremlins isn't true. There's one shot where they do something funny, which I'm frankly surprised got into the movie. Other than that they act the way you would expect carniverous fish to act. And the funny thing they do is nbatural too, it's just a funny-type situation.</p><p>I found all the characters interesting although Jerry O'Connell seemed to think he was in a different movie because he's the only one acting like a spastic cartoon character.</p><p>The brunette porn star was so fricken' gorgeous. I wanted more of her onscreen. Liz Shue was good. The actors did a good job of making me believe this was actually happening and actually making me feel involved.</p><p>It's not the slam-bang summer topper I was hoping for, but it was a good time.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:23 p.m. CST

    piranahs dont attack humans

    by RPLocke

    WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:26 p.m. CST

    Harry Owns the site

    by BoopyBeepy

    And he owns every single inception fan. Harry isn't stupid. He knows a fucking awesome movie when he sees it. And Inception is not a fucking awesome movie. End of story. I feel sorry for Harry. The people he has coming to his website now have no fucking taste. Back 6-7 years ago people who posted on this site weren't a bunch of whiny faggots. Harry has to explain things to the children now. He doesn't have adults coming to his website anymore, he has spoiled little children that think this site should conform to their stupid taste. This site is FREE, you dumb fucks, and Harry is a LEGEND. End of debate. And that's not even sucking Harry's dick, that's just the truth. I saw Harry Knowles at SO CAL Disneyland. I was a college kid working Custodial and I saw Fat Harry in his red scooter by the Corndog stand. The fucker had his spider man shoes on and a Marvel hawaiian shirt on and he was parked next to the corn dog stand. Yoko was standing in the corn dog line for him. So Harrys just sitting their waiting for his Corn dog, turning his head side to side to check out all the hot 15 year old teen girl ass walking up and down main street. And what blew my mind, while I leaned on my pan and broom, was that that fat red headed man in the electric scooter before me has achieved more than I will probably ever achieve, and more than most of you talk backers will ever achieve. There was a man who achieved his dream against all odds. There was a man who was around at the right place at the right time with the right mind. He was sitting alone fat and waiting for a corn dog, to any one else he would have looked like a fat pathetic invalid. But not to me, I saw a fat invalid that invented the greatest movie site in internet history. The talk backs are unrivaled. AICN ridiculousness is unrivaled. Harry is the lord of misrule. Remember that. Show a little respect. Show a little fucking manners around here. Aw its hopeless, the Nolan cult is too strong. The Nolan cult won't rest until the talk backs are turned into message boards. These inception fans are going to be the death of Harry. Inception fans have no humanity, that's why they torture him. Fuckin shame. AICN is the only place that still feels like the internet anymore. Don't change shit Harry. Keep being a silly fat fuck.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:37 p.m. CST

    by 172

    Yes, thank you Harry for finally taking the time to address the Inception debacle (even though I know it just came to you realizing that this Inception thing was NOT going to go away). I don't think it's so much that people REALLY have a problem with your preferences and opinions, because obviously we ALL have them, and the fun part of it is debating them. I think the problem came from that a LOT of people REALLY enjoyed Inception, and they were hoping that'd you put a little more effort in.. after all the effort put into the other reviews, the Inception one was just so half-assed, and it was obvious you weren't interested in doing it. "Sometimes, people deserve to have their faith rewarded." *sniff* anyways, I forgive you.. even though I know it was done under duress.. and you know what, big guy? I WILL see Scott Pilgrim.... on Blu Ray.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:37 p.m. CST

    BoopyBeepy

    by lock67ca

    He knows a fucking awesome movie when he sees it? Let me just say, A Nightmare on Elm Street. May want to rethink that statement, buddy. Kind of invalidates everything you've written.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 9:54 p.m. CST

    BoopyBeepy

    by ConfusedPanda

    At the very least, we appreciate your enthusiasm.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:14 p.m. CST

    WHAT LUCK!!

    by RPLocke

    This movie WILL be on HBO in a few months!

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:19 p.m. CST

    Movie reviews are meaningless nowadays.

    by daggor

    All the positive reviews on Rotten Tomatoes aren't saying it's a good movie, they're saying it's fun for the stupid tits-and-gore-and-camp-and-schlockfest that it is. This is a movie you watch at midnight with lots of people that like this stupid shit. You don't want to catch a matinée on Thursday, or rent the DVD and watch it with your sister. It's undoubtedly a horrible movie that, I guess, set out to be lousy. That IS NOT a good movie. For a while, reviewers would clarify: "It sucks, unless you like this stupid shit," but now they are getting away from even that little clarification. I love the Evil Dead movies, but I would never say they are "good movies." Any reviewer that gives a film like this a positive/negative isn't doing their job. I eagerly await an update on Ebert's site to see if he headlines the review for this with "Ha ha! Boobies!" And yeah, I'll see this eventually, but I won't pay for it. I really want to see the Chris Lloyd cameo, too., but I need to wait until I have nothing else important to do.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:26 p.m. CST

    just seen it

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    Was ok, did what it promised... enjoyed it more than Expendables sad to say...and was that lil girl Wolverine? Her foot sure did heal fast (there was a clear shot of the bottom of.her foot). But I was sorta disappointed but I should've realized its set underwater so it wouldn't be to clear (regardin deaths)

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 10:29 p.m. CST

    Harry, re: Most Blood

    by Alientoast

    The Shinning had blood, but have you forgotten Evil Dead 2 and the fire hose of blood? Kinda hard to beat the absurd gushers of blood in that flick.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:02 p.m. CST

    Can we drop the Inception review drama?

    by Joe Huber

    Harry has more than explained himself. All it comes down to is - his opinion is different than those of you who LOVE the film. He liked it. So what! You can feel differently from Harry, you know? The world didn't end because Harry doesn't love the movie as much as you do. As much as all of you are putting him down, why do you have such passion if his opinion doesn't matter to you? You're like the upset chick who caught the boyfriend checking out a hot woman at a party. GET OVER IT! Harry has his opinions and is entitled to them. Move on. All this bullshit/drama about Inception makes me never want to see it. I like Nolan but he's not what you all make him out to be. Great director? Yes. Best? I don't think so. Had Heath Ledger not died would The Dark Knight be held to such high esteem? Maybe, but I wonder.........

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:14 p.m. CST

    "Show a little respect,"

    by D.Vader

    HAH. Best response to that is "fuck off," :).

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:21 p.m. CST

    Yeah I enjoyed Shutter Island more and it's better.

    by UltraTron

    It's rated R for one thing. It doesn't have to pull punches. I'm sick of this joker putting 2 barrels in a guy's face then cut away bullshit. I want to see a deleted scene from inception where a guy on the bottom wakes up during the elevator kicker in time to see the guy in front of him splat

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:24 p.m. CST

    Yeah, every movie MUST be rated R.

    by RPLocke

    Hey, Expendables is Rated R. Go see that.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:29 p.m. CST

    Oh and Inception highlights Leo's giant baby head

    by UltraTron

    way too much. He has the head of a giant baby. A giant baby head. For those of you just joining us: Leo has a gigantic macro-baby head that makes Joe Don Baker jealous. Baker wishes his baby-head was as good looking. Goddamn baby heads, the both of em

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:30 p.m. CST

    ITS NOT ABOUT WHAT HARRY THOUGHT OF INCEPTION

    by Neck_Lucas

    Its about his attitude regarding Inception and how he treated the movie on the side of someone who claims to geek the fuck out over movies over anyone else in the industry..and then just decides the most talked about movie of the year is barely worth 4 paragraphs 3 WEEKS AFTER THE MOVIE CAME OUT...but here you go..here's your fucking pirahna review THE NIGHT IT CAME OUT..and a day before splash ads are plastered all over his site...Harry's not even trying anymore..and its pathetic

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:30 p.m. CST

    I just got home from "Piranha 3-D"! Wow.

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    I had a great time. That was certianly the goriest Hollywood film I've ever seen in a multiplex. If you've EVER been even the slightest bit annoyed by Eli Roth then YOU MUST see this film; his "last scene" is worth the price of admission. The opening credits looked like crap, but the rest of the 3-D in the film was very well done. This is the good time at the movies I've been looking for this Summer, but there we only about 20 people in the theater at the 8:20 PM show in the big theater here in Louisville. That's usually a microcausm for theaters everywhere, but I hope not. This doesn't deserve to bomb.

  • Aug. 20, 2010, 11:51 p.m. CST

    The Comic Con footage has leaked

    by centilope

    It looks pretty sweet. What I don't get is why are the Weinsteins hunting down the people who upload it. It's free advertising. Why won't they put up the footage in HD then? It doesn't make any sense.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 12:18 a.m. CST

    Ok, I get those of you who.....

    by Joe Huber

    feel like that. Harry's reviewing The Expendables, Piranha 3D etc when you all really wanted an Inception review. But you ever consider he's telling the truth that he had very little sleep and knew that posting a review would have got him all the negative attention that he got anyway? I'm nowhere near Harry as far as how much he reviews, but I can tell you reviewing movies is a lot more work than the end result you see here. You have to watch the movie (sometimes 2-3 times) do actual research, maybe get info from a movie's PR firm, write, re-write etc. I know how Harry feels though. No matter what he did he was going to get burned at the cross. Sometimes you have to be in the MOOD to do a review too. Readers can tell when the passion isn't there. Harry might have thick skin, but the man is human and has feelings. No way someone can review movies and NOT LOVE movies. It's one of the least rewarding experiences if you review enough movies given all the subpar shit out there. Especially when you are sure you are going to absolutely love a film and come away disappointed. I have a few movies I have to review and it seems like shit ALWAYS comes up and when I get down to it I just am not feeling those movies. Also people are so focused on Harry's relationships with celebrities and whether or not he gets extra access, but most people don't realize a lot of people get free shit for reviewing movies, from the movies themselves (DVD's, Blu-rays) to collectibles, premiere events etc. If that influenced reviews as much as people think than every movie would get a positive review from critics. I got something free along with review movies today. If I don't like the movie the free thing isn't going to make a difference on how I feel in my review. Harry's been doing this way longer than I have and I can say I am fairly new to reviewing movies, but there are a TON of factors that influence reviews, Mostly your daily life, when you write them, how you feel about a movie etc. Those who feel Harry is swayed by whether or not he has a relationship with Nolan, Sly etc, don't realize all the bridges Harry has burned when he's been critical of movies. Harry's completely right when he says about his love for films and how time-consuming it is and that doesn't add in other things going on with his life. It seems like every time you promise fans a review at a certain time SHIT comes up, comic con, making a deal for a website etc all of which is more time-consuming than anything. Plus mentioning the number of paragraphs Harry writes is a bit funny. Come on now! When you aren't passionate about something it's hard to even write four paragraphs about it. Especially when you know that no matter what you do, you will be shit on by people who feel differently than you do. Also if Harry isn't trying anymore why would his Expendables and Piranha reviews be posted so quickly? With Expendables a bit TOO quick because that review was lacking in professionalism, which I'm sure Harry would admit, even though I agree and love the movie as well. Harry also does DVD and Blu-ray reviews weekly (late here and there) but that alone eats up HOURS if you view movies more than once for the details. At the end of the day, you have to acknowledge that Harry is pretty busy. Running a website (two now), reviewing movies in theaters, DVD & Blu-ray, chatting with contacts whether it is potential partners, PR, movie companies, actors/directors, guys who write for AICN making deals, reading scripts and who knows what else? All that and living a life apart from this. I think the man gives his all here. Anybody who disagrees has no clue the amount of work it takes. Reviewing movies SOUNDS easy, but try it for more than a month. Try to do HALF the work Harry does and see how "easy" it is. Just connecting with PR and keeping current with the reps (who change fairly often in the film world, sometimes without notice) can be time-exhausting.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 12:52 a.m. CST

    BRAZIL - #1 of all time - don't waste your breath even trying...

    by frank cotton

    #1 of 1994 - LOVE AND A .45 - MARS ATTACKS! is fuckin' hilarious.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:03 a.m. CST

    HARRY OWNS A FAME, FAST FLEETING

    by Hosta_Mahogey

    Truly, there was barely fame to begin with, and what ever it is that he and this site once had is going and going fast. Total lack of relevance. Total lack of good content. Total lack of taste. Pretty much a total absence of all talent, ability, drive, charisma, and any other positive attribute that makes a person magnetic and successful. If it's a good personality trait or skill - you can be sure Harry's not got it. Now whacking off stories, he has in spades...<br /> <br /> This is just a bad blog by a nasty man with great, hilarious, consistently entertaining talk-backers. The community IS AICN.<br /> <br /> Harry can wheel his ginger-betes butt over to Famous Monsters.com or Pizza Hut's lunch buffet or back to the ICU he thought was so Ha Ha funny and it won't matter a tick to the world. This site will go on trashing herc and the other mostly tasteless talentless hacks (massa and vern excluded) who "write" for this blog.<br /> <br /> And Harry will be forgotten with the other so-called internet celebrities like tay zonday, seanbaby (who was brilliant), and the numa numa guy.<br /> <br />

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:19 a.m. CST

    Stupid, Stupid thing to say...

    by Hosta_Mahogey

    "Running a website (two now), reviewing movies in theaters, DVD & Blu-ray, chatting with contacts whether it is potential partners, PR, movie companies, actors/directors, guys who write for AICN making deals, reading scripts and who knows what else? All that and living a life apart from this. I think the man gives his all here. Anybody who disagrees has no clue the amount of work it takes. Reviewing movies SOUNDS easy, but try it for more than a month. Try to do HALF the work Harry does and see how "easy" it is. Just connecting with PR and keeping current with the reps (who change fairly often in the film world, sometimes without notice) can be time-exhausting." <br /> <br /> Really, that's a laugh. Total BS. It's a demanding job done well, to be sure. But if it's your passion then you should attack it 200%, 20 hours a day, 7 days a week. Your content should be as good as possible - pushing for it to be better at every cycle. Your collaborators have to be of super-high quality and their content pitch-perfect every time - or they are no longer your collaborators - fire them. <br /> <br /> The formula for success for an operation like this is passion and drive st 90%, with talent bringing up the rear with about 10%. With Harry you get big, fat, hairy nippled zeros on both sides of the equation. <br /> <br /> People rock out at tough jobs every day. When you add the components of LOVE and PASSION to that you should be able to move mountains. Harry's a lazy dreck who got lucky a few times, created something bigger and better than him and it will soon spiral out of control. <br /> <br /> I despise the lazy. You sir are the laziness and awash with spoiled, uncapitalized opportunities. If you ever find in yourself the mental capacity for self-reflection and analysis I suspect you'll find yourself quite saddened by your wasted potential.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:48 a.m. CST

    A fish barfs a dick into the camera. Harry's a prick.

    by MattmanReturns

    This is an awful fucking movie. The ONLY redeeming factor are Riley Steele and Kelly Brook as eye candy. The movie would've been slightly less awful if they had lived, and the one-dimensional family that we're strangely asked to care about at the last minute had perished. What a fucking travesty. Not even good on a "so bad it's good level".

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:54 a.m. CST

    I also saw Scott Pilgrim

    by MattmanReturns

    Because a friend convinced me to movie hop over to it. I'm shocked to say it was pretty damn good. So Harry's not a complete asshole for recommending THAT one. But you review enough movies, eventually you might get one right.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:59 a.m. CST

    UltraTron, you judge movies by their rating?

    by MattmanReturns

    Inception isn't a fucking horror film or a Die Hard action flick. There's nothing in the movie that calls for an R-rating. What a stupid argument.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:59 a.m. CST

    Feel sorry for all those American dudes

    by Kaitain

    ...who've been circumcised. Poor bastards have had to experience shitty-quality hand relief all their lives. And all thanks to Dr Kellogg (who also wanted girls to be circumcised in America, using acid).

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:02 a.m. CST

    And don't compare this shit to Gremlins

    by MattmanReturns

    This is no Gremlins. Gremlins is a movie with characters you care about, plot development, and payoff. Piranha has none of those things. It has quality tits, but as someone above pointed out, if you have the internet there's no reason to pay $16 to see tits.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:03 a.m. CST

    Also, this was Clash of the Titans style conversion 3D

    by MattmanReturns

    Every scene looked awful, and you could see the blurry cut and paste lines. Such a ripoff.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:32 a.m. CST

    I will laugh when this bombs

    by RPLocke

    Because it's painfully obvious that Transformers 2 actually deserves to make money over this piece of shit.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:38 a.m. CST

    Locke

    by MattmanReturns

    There was no one in the theater for this one, and the theater I go to is usually packed to the brim on Friday nights. When we hopped over the Scott Pilgrim, it was full... which might indicate just how badly Piranha will bomb, considering Pilgrim underperformed.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:50 a.m. CST

    I'm sure Expendables was MUCH better than this

    by RPLocke

    and more entertaining. This has been a bad summer for films. Just terrible. but, when Transformers 3 rolls around next summer, that will get slammed for being fun.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 3:05 a.m. CST

    KilliK

    by RPLocke

    Sure thing asshole.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 3:51 a.m. CST

    Please, for once, try to write a professional review

    by thegreatwhatzit

    And, gosh, you fraternized with turdmeister Eli Roth? That's up there with interviewing this year's Santa Claus impersonator at Wal Mart. But it's your fantasy to pretend that celebrities, who wouldn't know you from a Macy's Thanksgiving Day balloon, are your friends. Been invited to any L.A. barbecues lately?

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 4:12 a.m. CST

    Expendables was better

    by MattmanReturns

    It's action scenes were entertaining. Piranha was just repetitive scenes of bodies getting chewed up (which gets old fast). There were a couple of cool kills, but not enough to save the film.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 4:14 a.m. CST

    KilliK, you're no one to talk

    by MattmanReturns

    You're the biggest troll here. I like to fight with Locke, but at least he says funny shit from time to time. You're pretty much worthless.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:02 a.m. CST

    OK, Harry, so you creamed at the Underwater Ballet.....!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:04 a.m. CST

    I'm getting nauseous at your verbal BONERS, Harry....!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:06 a.m. CST

    I can just imagine you watching this film, pants bulging....EEK!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:06 a.m. CST

    I actually agree with Harry about Inception, however

    by Turd_Has_Risen_From_The_Grave

    he would have saved himself a lot of grief if he'd actually bothered to post those opinions in a review weeks ago.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 6:27 a.m. CST

    The Title of This Post

    by cowboyone

    Why? Why is it composed this way? Why does it vacillate back and forth between first and third person? Why isn't Harry getting better at writing -- he does it every day!

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 8:01 a.m. CST

    Jessica Szohr

    by Garbageman33

    I'm sorry, but she's just really homely. And yet, we're supposed to believe that the "girls gone wild" guy just has to have this lovely specimen on his bang boat? Out of all the beautiful girls waving their tits at him? Sorry, but that took me right out of the movie. I believe that man-eating prehistoric fish exist. But I refuse to believe that Jessica Szohr is hot.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 9:13 a.m. CST

    Great little flick, and plenty fun.

    by TheLastCleric

    At no point in this film are you supposed to care about the characters; that’s simply not the kind of movie this is. Piranha is a pure B flick with a decent budget, some serviceable CG, a surprisingly solid cast, and a fuck-ton of gore. I have no idea why anyone would try and deconstruct the film like it was a regular cinematic offering because this is clearly an exercise in bombastic absurdity for the sheer purpose of entertaining. As a true horror enthusiast, I loved the insanely excessive kill shots and appreciated how streamlined the whole thing was. I also had a blast. Also, if Aja really wanted us to care about the family, why did he imply they’re all probably fish food at the end?

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:02 a.m. CST

    Inception Did Indeed Suck With Much Suckitude

    by Lesbianna_Winterlude

    Look into your Batman-masturbating heart. You know it to be true.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:07 a.m. CST

    Coollllll

    by susankq1111

    I strongly recommend ______ B l a c k w h i t e C u p i d * C o m ______ to you where I just found my interracial boyfriend! You know it is a great place to meet black men and beautiful women. What's kind of relationship do you want? ;)

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:26 a.m. CST

    alot

    by eatsnackysmores

    isn't a word. Instead, try this: "The English language sure does get butchered a lot on aintitcool!"

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:31 a.m. CST

    This movie was well done.

    by VonThunderballs

    Citizen Kane!? Pfft. This is far superior. I was hoping the fish would've bitten off that girls tits as they dragged her ass through the water though.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:35 a.m. CST

    Now logging on to BlackwhiteCupid*Com---

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    I hope Halle Berry is online--

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:36 a.m. CST

    BRAVO HARRY!

    by PRESIDENT BALTAR

    GREAT JOB DEFENDING YOURSELF! INCEPTION WHORES CAN SUCK IT!

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 12:14 p.m. CST

    If I saw Harry in real life, I'd make fun of him...

    by Mr. Pricklepants

    Because that is how I roll!

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 12:27 p.m. CST

    Don't know about this argument...

    by Red Ned Lynch

    ...but I know Aja knows how to play this damned game. <p> Think about all the remakes and squeakquels done over the last decade to interesting properties. And either the people who made the film ignored or just didn't understand what the property they were squatting on was about (Halloween), proved they weren't worthy of the property while trying to prove they were better than it (Black Christmas) or just made the weakest, no heart, paycheck collecting shit imaginable (Nightmare on Elm Street). <p> Well Aja got the reins to a pretty enjoyable old piece of Corman/Sayles/Bradford Fuckin' Dillman crap...and he made an even more enjoyable piece of crap. <p> And that's 'jes what you're s'pose to do. Like playing mumbley peg on a drunken Friday night with the ROTC guy whose brother gave him the misspelled homemade tattoo, laughing when you get cut and getting rewarded with a quick nasty from Becky Dieter, the peter eater. <p> Thanks, Andre, that was offensive, stupid and almost exactly, precisely right.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 12:59 p.m. CST

    But Harry...

    by Red Ned Lynch

    ...a review of this movie wouldn't have to mention Roth. Or if it did mention him it would do so, at most, in passing. This was the kind of stupid wonderful exploitation riff that we don't get fed much anymore. Seriously, you should have been all over this. This review reads like "I gotta' say I like it because my buddy's on board. This movie's way too goodbad for that.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:08 p.m. CST

    Harry....given what you've...

    by Red Ned Lynch

    ...posted above I must ask you this very important question... <p> What would you do if you and your girlfriend came face to face with a...disembodied dick?" <p> Answer it correctly and you earn some really specialized and disgusting geek cred.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:31 p.m. CST

    I know this much: Kelly Brook is built to destroy you.

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    And someone needs to ban RPLocke.<P>Do it for the children, Harry.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:37 p.m. CST

    Aja should direct the Hellraiser remake

    by centilope

    I was hoping Pascal Laugier would do it, but apparently his idea was too hard to swallow for the Weinsteins.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:41 p.m. CST

    Mr. Nice Gaius!

    by Red Ned Lynch

    Have you seen Survival Island? Hard not to if you have access to US cable, as it plays everywhere all the time. Not the Survival Island which is sometimes called Survival Tiki Island, which stars Xander from Buffy and the Choctaw Bingo sexy Jaime Pressly but the other one, with BillyBald Zane and Kelly Brook? <p> It provides an admirable showcase for her voluminous talents.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:49 p.m. CST

    You're a terrible writer, Harry.

    by mr teaspoon

    You can't even stick to third or first person in your own fucking headline.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:50 p.m. CST

    by centilope

    http://tinyurl.com/29pbd8m

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:53 p.m. CST

    A showcase of Kelly Brook's talent

    by centilope

    http://tinyurl.com/29pbd8m

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 1:59 p.m. CST

    I just fingered my prostate

    by centilope

    While trying to type in my previous post. Sorry about that, won't happen again. OK, maybe a few more times, but that's it.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:14 p.m. CST

    centilope....

    by Red Ned Lynch

    ...don't worry, soon you can do both. At the end of the year Apple's unveiling the IAss.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:23 p.m. CST

    Mr. Nice Gaius

    by RPLocke

    He should ban you. You're such a worthless whiner fuck. All you talk about is how much better you think you are than everyone else. Pretentious prick.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:52 p.m. CST

    RPLocke

    by centilope

    If Harry would ban every "worthless whiner fuck" that posts in the Talkbacks, the number of posts would decrease by 98 percent, and I'm being generous here.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 2:53 p.m. CST

    centilope

    by RPLocke

    Pretty much.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 3:10 p.m. CST

    On behalf of my friends and underwater ballet

    by Traveler 27

    I am glad that the credits and the underwater ballet seem to get the best review from Harry and others, because my friends worked on those parts, and those parts alone! They have had to battle H'wood on the whole 3D thing, having worked with Cameron on Aliens of the Deep back before 3D was a viable option. So I'm glad for them, finally. The biz can bleed you dry..Oh, and I have to say, though I don't agree with your Inception opinion, I am probably in a different head space than you. When Requiem for a dream came out, I thought it was the most pretentious movie I had ever seen, so I hated the movie everyone else loved. I am having to force myself to rewatch it, though, with a fresh mind, to see if I still think the same of it a decade or so later. I also hated Eyes Wide Shut when I first saw it (well, not hated, but it made no sense at all to me), but have since come to think of it as a masterpiece. So, you know, whatever. But KUDOS to my pals and their one sequence plus titles. After trying to get Little Hercules in 3D made properly, and the mess that went through...KUDOS. WORD.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 3:23 p.m. CST

    I'd do terrible, awful things to Kelly Brook

    by Garbageman33

    Which is to say, I'd prematurely cum in my pants and spend the rest of the night apologizing.

  • ...I'm sure Yoko describes it as "what Harry calls fucking."

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 4:28 p.m. CST

    I might be crazy

    by kurtisaurus

    but I really liked Pirahna 3D. It knew exactly what it was and fully delivered just that. Insane and goofy pirahna-based ultraviolence, lotsa (and I mean LOTSA) boobs, great cameos and just a fun summer movie.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 4:42 p.m. CST

    Sly on Fox News!

    by FrenchBastard03

    I wonder if Harry knows his good buddy Stallone was yamming it up with Mr. Bill O'Reilly on conservative Fox News Channel. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0e3tVlcxMAw

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:22 p.m. CST

    Nothing remotely negative in that Fox News interview

    by MattmanReturns

    All Stallone does is deny he put any intentional message in the movie. Seems like a cool guy.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:41 p.m. CST

    Red Ned Lynch!

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    I have not seen the whole thing. But I have seen some very, very nice selected clips. Oh yes...her voluminous talents are, indeed, a sight to behold. Kelly Brook and Christina Hendricks have rediscovered the long lost art of CURVES!

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 5:46 p.m. CST

    RPLocke

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    No, he should ban you. On general fucking principal. You're a useless, senseless, 24 hour-a-day Twittering prat. You couldn't waste more time on this site if Harry paid you. There is no way you have a life beyond the reach of your keyboard.<P>Get any new autographs lately? How many hand-jobs did you have to give out?

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 6 p.m. CST

    Mr. Nice Gaius

    by RPLocke

    lol, asshole.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 6:38 p.m. CST

    "No YOU should be banned!"

    by MattmanReturns

    Jesus Christ, feel like I'm surrounded by 8 year olds. STFU and talk about the movie.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 6:44 p.m. CST

    MattmanReturns

    by Mr. Nice Gaius

    I haven't seen it yet. But once I do, I'm sure I'll talk about it...especially Kelly Brooks physical attributes.<P>Oh, and you should be banned.<P>;^)

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 6:57 p.m. CST

    FrenchBastard03

    by Neck_Lucas

    yeah um..all the hollywood Badasses are Conservatives..Sly, Clint, Bruce, Tom Selleck, Arnold..and libs have maaaaaaat daaymon and sean penn.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:03 p.m. CST

    Harry should ban himself from his own site

    by Turd_Has_Risen_From_The_Grave

    He contributes the least of anyone here.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:06 p.m. CST

    None of those guys are conservative, except for Chuck

    by Turd_Has_Risen_From_The_Grave

    Who is a loony tune born again who wants Texas to secede from the United States and no separation between church and state. But the others are all moderate to liberal 'Republicans' or libertarians.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:07 p.m. CST

    If you think the point of Shawshank...

    by Marshal_Lannes

    ...is that a 'magical negro' helps a white dude get through his prison sentence, you need to stop commenting on movies. The 'magical negro' is the narrator and stand in for the audience. Andy Dufrense ran his game and was 3 steps ahead of everyone else....THAT's the point.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:09 p.m. CST

    HAUTE TENSION: GREAT! MIRRORS: CRAP

    by uberman

    I loved Haute Tension but loathed Mirrors. So now do I see Piranha 3D? If all I knew was that this director did Haute Tension, I'd go tonight, BUT...'Mirrors' was so godawful terrible that I have to put this off until it comes out in DVD. "mirrors' is just that bad.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:42 p.m. CST

    Mr. Nice Gaius

    by MattmanReturns

    Touche.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:43 p.m. CST

    Morgan Freeman DOES have magic powers in real life

    by MattmanReturns

    But his character in Shawshank Redemption didn't. That's good acting.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 7:47 p.m. CST

    What's with this "Haute Tension" nonsense?

    by MattmanReturns

    Do you also call Pan's Labyrinth "El Laberinto Del Fauno"?

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 9 p.m. CST

    This may be the only 3D movie I'll ever pay to see in a theatre.

    by Richard Cranium

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 9 p.m. CST

    This may be the only 3D movie I'll ever pay to see in a theatre.

    by Richard Cranium

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 9:03 p.m. CST

    Continuation of the previous thought...

    by Richard Cranium

    The reason I say that is because 3D is a stupid ass stunt to try to extract an extra 5 bucks a ticket from idiots, nothing more. This would appear to be the first movie that I've seen that fully embraces that. Good for them

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 9:09 p.m. CST

    I don't want to see ferngully with teeth.

    by RPLocke

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 9:46 p.m. CST

    PIRANHA 3D: boxoffice flop

    by thegreatwhatzit

    Bombed! I was betting that it would at least crack $10 million. If you think Harry's typically amateurish review was a disappointment, think about the consequences: R-rated horror films will be handicapped with the "zip boxoffice' bromide. Back to PG-13. As for politics in thisforum, I defected from the Democratic party (Obama, Reid, Pelosi: suck). I'm now an independent. If the Repubs wanna lose, put Palin on the ticket. If Democrats are truly masochistic, put Clinton on the ticket. Frankly, I'm sick of the whole business.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 10:07 p.m. CST

    yahcc

    by xuebi

    Hello. My friend URL: http://www.Yahcc.us The new update, a large hot FREE sHIPPING WE ACCEPT PYAPAL PAYMENT YOU MUST NOT MISS IT!!! thank you !!!

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 10:16 p.m. CST

    The scene where the douchebag tries to save himself--

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    One of my favorite scenes in the movie that nobody is talking about (there's the underwater ballet, the O'Connel loss of manhood, the Eli Roth head trauma scene, etc.) is the scene where the teen douchebag jumps in a motorboat during the big attack sequence and inacts the age old ritual of self preservation. He basically kills and disfigures more people than the piranhas trying to save his own worthless ass. I may be a sick puppy, but I was laughing my ass off.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 10:31 p.m. CST

    This site needs a counter-critic...

    by Boober

    that is philosophical, a high intellectual with wit and writing ability, and is devoid of typical arrogance within the critic's world. I for one would....asd.fg. Wait, did I just fall asleep? How long was I out?

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 10:45 p.m. CST

    Boober

    by lock67ca

    I thought Harry was a philosopher. Tossing off into tube socks? Pure existential brilliance, I tells ya!

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 10:53 p.m. CST

    At least the Harry/Inception talk is dying.

    by bigbadbua

    So what if he didn't like it..... I did, quite a bit, and him not liking it doesn't affect my liking of it. As for Piranha, I went with one of my friends and we both had a great time. Neither of us expected Oscar material, and enjoyed what we got. A fun cap to the summer season.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11 p.m. CST

    As has been said befoe....

    by lock67ca

    It's not that he didn't like it. It's the way he dealt with the whole thing that pissed most people off.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:14 p.m. CST

    Half an hour of chaos

    by keylimepirate

    Each Piranha film has had that capper of chaos. This one certainly takes the cake. Stolen speedboats, silcone jobs, and a deadly fish belching out a penis, all together with the most mutilated Spring Breakers ever imagined. Not a bad 3D ride.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:48 p.m. CST

    "Magical Negro"??

    by BizarroJerry

    I'm not sure Red fits that concept in any way at all. Red is merely the observer in the film. Andy is the "magic" character in that film. Either figure out the true meaning of the term, or rewatch the movie. Besides, we all know Shawshank is one of those films that causes a backlash following the praise it receives, but that's usually from the people who are trying to pretend they're smarter than everyone else.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:52 p.m. CST

    Maybe I missed some key development

    by BizarroJerry

    But at no time would I ever be interested in movies with 3d vomit and vicious animals biting cocks and tits. Sickos.

  • Aug. 21, 2010, 11:59 p.m. CST

    Bizarro

    by Rebeck2

    Nevermind him - he's obviously thinking of "The Green Mile" and not "Shawshank". Yes, he's a complete fucking idiot.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 1:57 a.m. CST

    The Reluctant Austinite

    by MattmanReturns

    I think that guy killed more people than the piranhas.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 2:32 a.m. CST

    Masturbation!

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    Anyone who doesn't jerk-off into a soft, easily disposable kleenex... is a fucking weirdo. <P> FACT. <P> I mean, really? SOCKS?! Bath towels?!? a fucking CANTELOPE?!?!? <P> You people are strange...

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 2:34 a.m. CST

    My favorite part of this talkback...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    was EVERYONE ragging on RPLocke... lol <P> That fucker is truly, the eighth wonder of the world.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 2:41 a.m. CST

    And it was nice to see Harry interacting with his fanbase...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    HOWEVER... He really has lost a lot of respect from me (from a film critic perspective). Harry, we get it... you "love" movies. And you see A FUCKING METRIC TON of them. I think thats maybe why you lost a little objectivity. <P> Expendables? Scott Pilgrim? Piranha 3d?!? <P> And you liked the terribly mediocre Shutter Island, over the fantastic Inception?? WTF man... lol I just don't get it. And again, this really all started back in the Godzilla/Armaggedon/The Phantom Menace days... you definitely have a questionable track record. But i do appreciate your enthusiasm! <P> Just try to be a little more objective, k big guy? ;-)

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 2:43 a.m. CST

    And for the record...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    Kelly Brook is pretty fucking HAWT. <P> Big, natural, perky tittays FTW!!!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 3:15 a.m. CST

    Inception Review = Straw

    by Doc_Martigan

    Harry, I don't care if you hated Inception. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. And to be honest you have badly tainted your "film review" credibility by constantly stroking off in public about the film makers you are "tight" with. If Chris Nolan called you personally and talked about his films or answered talkbackers questions on this site you'd have said that that Inception WAS a game changer and a masterpiece in order to maintain that connection. We all know that. It is not hard to see that we really can't take your reviews seriously. So hate Inception all you want, I get reviews I can trust elsewhere. What is off putting is the way you handle this site. Your reviews (when you do them) aren't great. You try to build up this history with you and the franchise or you and the genre and make it personally touching. OR you go completely perverted. Neither work. The website itself sucks, you guys only review the biggest movie of the week (and sometimes not even that.) Go to Cinematical or Spill or any other number of movie sites and they have constant content. They work hard to provide reviews and blogs and interviews with their readers. While you fall asleep in one of the most anticipated movies of the season by one of the best directors working. I understand not getting sleep, but you should either take care of yourself, skip a movie if you are that tired, or if you fall asleep, go see it again and dont tell us that you fall asleep in movies because dude, that is your fucking job. If i told my boss that i didnt get a report done because i was too tired and had to nap at work, id probably be fired. The backlash may be primarily related to your review, but it is not surprising as your readers are just fucking tired of your shit. Some people check this site daily. They are loyal and they have every right to be pissed off at what a waste of time it's becoming. My first suggestion to fix this pile of shit that I still load up every day, bring back Vern reviews. #2 Update the design. #3 Review movies. Review movies Review Movies. #4 Deflate your ego. I think you have gotten caught up with how many celebrities use you to get your site to promote their films. Back to basics man. We don't care. Just give us content worth a damn. Please

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 3:24 a.m. CST

    That Girl From The Lowes Commercials...

    by Bob_Dole

    GARGANTUAN FOREHEAD <p> LMAO for like five minutes over that screen name. And I'm sober! <p> Fuckin' A...

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 3:36 a.m. CST

    Bob Dole

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    haha... thanks for the props man. <P> Glad i could make you laugh ;-)

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 5:53 a.m. CST

    Piranha is about 2 things, Kelly brooks tits.

    by JackGraham

    saw them last night. quite impressive. her tits i mean, not the film. the film was shit. boring, not scary, no tension, no characters worth a damn, bad acting, especially from Kelly Brook, but as i said, her tits do most of the acting, the film has no memorable moments, its stupid gory rather than shocking gory, the fishies themselves look quite real, good CGI work, but the film is more about hot women baring the flesh than scares and tension. it aint no Jaws. It aint even Jaws 2. it's The Hills meets Playboy meets Lake Placid meets shit.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:05 a.m. CST

    Boober

    by centilope

    Vern (or Outlaw Vern) is the guy you are looking for, he has his own website (or websight, as he likes to call it) with a shitload of reviews, pretty much all of them can be considered classics of modern writing. Be sure to check out the two books he got published while you're at it.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:14 a.m. CST

    JackGraham

    by centilope

    You do know that the original Piranha was kind-of a Jaws parody. It wasn't meant to be taken seriously. This new version is trying to recapture the spirit of the original. It is fully embracing it's own ridiculousness. Love it or hate it, you gotta respect it.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:28 a.m. CST

    Centilope...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    You probably say the same wankery about Snakes on a fuckin Plane, don't you? <P> "Embracing its own ridiculousness"... <P> Jesus christ. You APOLOGISTS will make excuses for ANYTHING. Anything, i tells ya!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:30 a.m. CST

    And watch out JackGraham!

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    Saying negative things like that, will get you labeled as a "HATER"... you know, 'cause we just HATE EVERYTHING. ;-)

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:40 a.m. CST

    Centiliope ...

    by JackGraham

    yeah I know the original piranha wasnt meant to be taken seriously, just like this new version. yeah it was tongue in cheek, but it wasn't funny. i didn't laugh, nor was I loving it because it didn't take itself seriously. but neither of these points are the reason I didn't like it. I didn't like it because I didn't think it was a good movie. Gremlins is tongue in cheek and doesnt take itself too seriously, Gremlins 2 even more, and I love those movies. Piranha doesn't compare. it was shit. what more can I say.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:42 a.m. CST

    That girl ... whose name is too long ....

    by JackGraham

    I hear ya, but seriously, did you like Pirahna 3d?

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 7:12 a.m. CST

    JackGraham - Oh FUCK no... lol

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    I'm not gonna see that shit... <P> I'm just gonna wait until Kelly Brook's nude scene hits the net ;-)

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 7:13 a.m. CST

    Jack...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    I like you man. I've seen some of your posts before... I think we have very similar taste in film/art, etc. My entire first post to you was completely sarcastic lol

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 8:19 a.m. CST

    Loved this movie!

    by SCOTTPLIGRIMFAILEDMISERABLY

    It was a hell of a lot of fun!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 8:23 a.m. CST

    LMAO

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    Did SCOTTPILGRIMFAN finally get banned?? <P> LULZ <P> Good work Harold!!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 8:46 a.m. CST

    I actually agree with Harry's review, tube sock withstanding

    by The Founder

    Harry has had his share of misses more then hits, but this is one of the rare times i agree wit his review. it's spot on.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 8:52 a.m. CST

    Saw it, and it was cheesy, ridiculas, bad acting and fun as HELL

    by The Founder

    When did so many of us become so jaded and hateful towards damn near every movie and actor nowadays??? When? Call me an idiot, but I was waiting for this movie and while I thought i was going to be disappointed it turned out far better then expected. This film didn't hold back a damn thing. These creative team knew this sh!t was cheesy and bad and they embraced. hey didn't try to make it understandable or plotholeless. No, they set out to to make a gory freaking scene as good as possible, with the story if you can call it that around the gore and ass. it worked for me. I had fun and laughs. The audience eat it up.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 8:58 a.m. CST

    TheFounder...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    "They embraced the SHITTY CHEESYNESS" of it all? <P> Sorry guy, but that doesn't make me want to see it lol. <P> "We knew this was a terrible idea... but hey, WE WENT FOR IT!" <P> Yeeeeaaaahhhhh... Fuck off.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9 a.m. CST

    Nice to see Elizabeth Shue get some work. Did she walk away from

    by The Founder

    Was never sure what happened to her. It seemed like she had enough talent a popularity to maintain a working career rather on the big screen or more so on a cable tv show that succeeds but she just disappeared. Saw on Kimmel that she is an actual RN at some hospital. Not sure if it was a joke but it sure seemed real.As insulting to women as this comment is when they get older, she still looks good.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9:09 a.m. CST

    So...

    by kolchak

    no Hatchet II trailer coverage, Harry?

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9:11 a.m. CST

    @That_Girl you just proved my point.

    by The Founder

    Everything doesn't have to be some awesome LOTR epic that comes out. I actually, unlike you and many others know how to watch a movie and have fun. I'm not defending anyone who made this film, I certainly don't have any stake in the film and isn't looking for a sequel but call me what ever you want, I had fun watching it. I'm not trying to sell this movie to anyone. I certanly don't suggest anyone go see it. unless it's what you want. You're naive if you think some creative team pitched this idea because they really thought they had something great and it was going to get steller reviews. This movie was cheesy and loaded with bad acting and bad cgi. This is an example of someone either knowing some people with clout or has clout themselves in Hollywood. I can't see some new team pitching this idea to a studio for financiang and not getting arrrested for tresspassing afterwards.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9:28 a.m. CST

    HARRY STILL SUCKS ROTHS WANG

    by Arcadian Del Sol

    I may have lost count, but I think Harry mentioned Eli Roth's SAG award about 4 times. Then he put him into the same company as Olivier and Guiness.<p> This whole update was a textual BJ for Eli Roth, and is just another example of what this site has become.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9:54 a.m. CST

    "2010: THE YEAR OF SCOTT PILGRIM"

    by Trazadone

    Really? Are you referring to the movie that came out last week that utterly bombed because no one outside of ultra-fanboys gave a shit about it? I suppose 2010 might be remembered as "THE YEAR SCOTT PILGRIM BOMBED" It's not even in the top 5 this week and it's only been out for a week. Get a life.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:06 a.m. CST

    Expendables wins 2nd week in a row

    by Jehovahs_Witness

    I haven't seen it...but I'm still kinda glad for the guy...Sly, that is.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:07 a.m. CST

    TheFOunder...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    So did you enjoy "The Happening" too? How about "Alone in the Dark"? "Catwoman"? <P> Were those "fun" too? <P> ;-)

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:08 a.m. CST

    And for the record...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    The LOTR trilogy was decidedly MEDIOCRE... <P> "Willow" taps dat ass.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:27 a.m. CST

    *wonders if "crow3711" will stalk him in THIS talkback...

    by That_Girl_From_The_Lowes_Commercials_GARGANTUAN_FOREHEAD

    *waits patiently*

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 12:11 p.m. CST

    That girl ... whose name is too long ....

    by JackGraham

    i don't know what to say. I'm flattered you like me. I'm not gay though so if you're trying to get in my pants ... ;) Agree with you about LOTR. I never took to it. I agree with the description of LOTR from Clerks 2 where one character describes it as 9 hrs of walking.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 12:58 p.m. CST

    Harry and his opinions

    by TheCrouton

    Harry is entitled to his views on the films he watches. Does that mean I agree with him? Not always. I disagree strongly with his review of Inception, which I think is the best film so far this year. However, I saw Piranha 3-D last night, and have to say I thoroughly enjoyed it from beginning to end. Not a great film by any means, but had a great time watching it.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 1:53 p.m. CST

    richaed

    by JackGraham

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 1:56 p.m. CST

    at least Richard Dreyfuss had the good sense to die early ...

    by JackGraham

    albeit in the most terrible use of CGI water i've ever seen, save for maybe the tidal wave in Deep Impact and Air Force One finally crashing in the water in erm Air Force One.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 2:39 p.m. CST

    Eli Roth

    by thegreatwhatzit

    sucks. Some friends who drew a paycheck from 2001 MANIACS described him as "an egocentric, insensitive prick who annoyed the director, Tim Sullivan. It's likely that Roth was jealous of Sullivan's talent and fraternity with the cast." And now he's Tarentino's shoeshine boy. Harry, the mainstream is clueless about Roth--nobody cares! But it's your world--you know, the milieu where you delude yourself into thinking that Stallone and other vendors, pitching movies, are your friends. Roth is the best that you can do so you invent his celebrity. Sad little world.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 3 p.m. CST

    This was straight to DVD shit

    by antonphd

    I didn't bother watching all of it. And the underwater girls scene was meh.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 3:06 p.m. CST

    Hey lay off richard

    by antonphd

    Acting is a bullshit career and the only thing that makes it worth anything is the pay. Respect as an actor is worthless. Enjoying the good life... that is worth five minutes in a boat on a soundstage.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 3:48 p.m. CST

    Eli Roth seems like a prick ...

    by JackGraham

    various interviews i've seen him do have led me to conclude this. that and the fact that he just physically looks like a prick. and he's called Eli, a prickish name. ok.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 4:42 p.m. CST

    About this Website's reviews...

    by orliplayer

    All the people saying "Harry, stop making excuses for your Inception review" or "admit it, you didn't like it 'cause you didn't understood it" , go to the reviews tab and click it... better yet, let me put it here for you to read... Why AICN reviews are different Written by Harry Knowles comes the Ain't It Cool Movie Reviews! What makes these so different is my philosophy that film review doesn't begin and end with the opening and ending titles. There is more to it. What we do and who we are affects the review. Instead of hiding that, I share it. You should know who your reviewer is, what he was anticipating and what happened to him/her on that particular day. As well as a film review that DOES NOT SPOIL the film for you, the reader. Enjoy revival films, current films and future films are reviewed here from time to time. And if you don't like his reviews, get over it!! There are other critics in this site that liked the movie! I liked Inception too, but I, as an intelligent human being, can see all the points Harry made that made him not like the movie as much as we do. And he LIKED the movie, not just as much as he wanted to.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 5:01 p.m. CST

    I wish Harry was dead

    by darrenspool

    lol jk

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 5:18 p.m. CST

    Saw it with my mates the other day!

    by SachMan

    Walked into this Film to have a cheesey night out with a few beers with the lads, this film accomplised that on all levels! and if your a Brit "KELLY BROOK IS UNDERWATER NAKED IN 3D FOR 10 YES 10 MINS" YES that was very shallow but that 10 mins off 3D was AWSOME! AVA What!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 5:18 p.m. CST

    Saw it with my mates the other day!

    by SachMan

    Walked into this Film to have a cheesey night out with a few beers with the lads, this film accomplised that on all levels! and if your a Brit "KELLY BROOK IS UNDERWATER NAKED IN 3D FOR 10 YES 10 MINS" YES that was very shallow but that 10 mins off 3D was AWSOME! AVA What!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 5:24 p.m. CST

    For the Record!

    by SachMan

    This film does what it says on the TIN it aint no classic its a chessy horror thats does NOT take itself seriously and if Big boobs in 3D and classic kills aint your kinda thing then you really should watch another movie! as for Inception Yes I`m with everyone else it was Film of the year for me (So Far really hoping Tron is as good as the trailers show)but Harry is entitled to his opinion and its good to see some people not going with the sheep which is what most you whinny net nerds do somtime.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 6:55 p.m. CST

    Remember when Dreyfuss to that Porn Convention?

    by MST3KPIMP

    This may be worse.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 7:05 p.m. CST

    Athlete's foot in your penis

    by gun_will_travel

    Really, a sock?

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 8:47 p.m. CST

    the sock explains something....

    by Bouncy X

    now we know how the inventor of the Fleshlight came up with the idea.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9:25 p.m. CST

    Porn stars/WWE stars/Rappers/PopSingers

    by BetterCallSaul

    stay the fuck out of mainstream movies

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 9:43 p.m. CST

    FORGETFULPETE'S BOTTOM LINE

    by ForgetfulPete

    KICK ASS Harry says THIS ONE RULES! Harry does everything he possibly can to pimp this movie on his site! Box office opening weekend $19,828,687 SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD Harry says THIS ONE RULES! Harry does everything he possibly can to pimp movie on his site! Opening Box-Office: $10,609,795 PIRANA 3D Harry says THIS ONE RULES! Harry does everything he can to pimp this movie on his site! Opening box office: $10,035,000 FORGETFULPETE'S BOTTOM LINE The studios now know they can count on Harry and the geeks to bring in about $10m worth of box-office and NO MORE. The opening of KICK-ASS also came at the -height- of the superhero movie craze, so another $10m went to curiosity-seekers. This means the box-office clout of AICN is about $10-15m. You think when a studio wants $250m they're gonna listen to or care about this site? The studios know the truth. Expect REBOOTS REMAKES REDOS REIMAGININGS this is the ONLY WAY TO MAKE MONEY IN AMERICAN MOVIES!

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:39 p.m. CST

    Original's Piranha are geneticly engineered to destroy enemy

    by UltraTron

    river systems. What's with this prehistoric stuff I'm hearing? Original is pretty good but first attack on campers is- it's amazing Dante got work after that scene. It is simply one of the worst edited shitty fucking scenes ever. Best scene is the extended hd footage of shark Jaws. Atari is uncredited. So Harry- I haven't heard you mention anything about the fact that all this stuff you didn't like in Inception is bullshit. And this corporate bullshit implanting crap is just bullshit in Leo's dream. His wife is trying to get him to wake up along with his now grown children. He's been trapped for years and they are pulling him layer by layer out of the dreamworld. They mention several times it's all bullshit- micheal Kane says it's bullshit and makes fun of leo's delusion when we first meet him. The whole movie is a dream. His wife is trying to extract him when she commits suicide. The movie is really Extraction. The Inception crap is all to fool Leo into returning because he won't kill himself to wake up.

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:42 p.m. CST

    His kids are unchanged and he realizes that when he sees

    by UltraTron

    them at the end

  • Aug. 22, 2010, 10:44 p.m. CST

    Oh no wait- that might have been shutter island

    by UltraTron

    I get confused sometimes when I forget to take my medicine

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 12:13 a.m. CST

    And I've heard you bitch about the ski sequence

    by UltraTron

    but never once mention it's actually the opening level of nintendo 64 goldeneye. The character in the film dreamed it up because he played the fuck out of it like Nolan.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 1:16 a.m. CST

    hatchet 2 is gonna have the most blood

    by darkpassenger

    cant wait for that movie it's gonna rule, hope theres a review for that soon( and hope it comes here to san diego) , btw pirahna was great, jerry o connell was actually pretty good for once, and the last scene was pretty hilarious, didnt expect to see the brother from vampire diaries as the main charater

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 1:47 a.m. CST

    Everything bombed this weekend

    by RPLocke

    Critics suck.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 4:34 a.m. CST

    Unfortunately "Vampires Suck" DIDN'T bomb

    by MattmanReturns

    It's made $18 mil already and cost $20... so it'll actually take a profit at some point. Which is a disgusting thought.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 4:45 a.m. CST

    Saw Piranha 3D

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    Saw it, laughed pretty much constantly for 88 minutes, liked the boobies, loved the gore, went "ewwwww" a couple of times. Saw a few things I really CANNOT believe they actually put in a movie.<p> This film is a MUST see. If only for the reason that it will completely divide critics and geeks alike for a long time and you just need to know what they are talking about.<p> Exploitation trash of the highest order. Love it!

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 4:53 a.m. CST

    Quite a lot missing though!

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    Is it just me or was quite a lot from the trailers and TV spots missing?<p> 1) That chick from Gossip Girl yelling "There's something in the water" whilst on the galley work surface in the sinking boat.<p> 2) The red bikini girl on the inflatable raft with the silver flashes in the water of the fish all around here as they circle her then all converge at once.<p> 3) The hand trying to cling on by it's nails over the side of the wooden dock being dragged back, leaving scratch marks.<p> 4) That girl underwater (was it Kelly Brook???) with her head against the rocks as the fish hover inches from her face, trying to get her face as far away as she can.<p> I don't recall seeing any of this is the film. Or was I still reeling from the sheer bloodiness that I missed them?<p> Finally, no matter how hard I try and remember, I cannot recall how Derrick's film director / assistant guy with the gappy teeth and the sunscreen on his nose dies? Does he have a death scene? Honestly, I can't remember it!!! He's on the boat, and he's not there at the end but I can't recall a death. I am scared I have some short term memory loss.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 5:40 a.m. CST

    What mood was Harry in when he watched this?

    by Knuckleduster

    Was he sleepy? Was he hungry? Was he grumpy? Was he horny? I think he was horny. That's why he liked it. Once again his mood determines his final opinion of a film. This is, after all, the guy who thought that Inception was supposed to be A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors. <p> He actually thought the characters could imagine bigger guns... and WHOOP!, suddenly they have bigger guns in their hands! Ha ha ha! "Why didn't they dream up jet packs and giant sea monsters? Nolan should dream bigger! I'm so smart." <p> This guy suffers from a serious case of Ineption.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 5:46 a.m. CST

    dude_gimme_tabs

    by vin_diggler

    The camera guy fell in the water with the girl when Jerry O'Connel ran into the rocks. He was the first one eaten. My question is did they really need to hire a local to show them how to get to the middle of the lake?

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 7:36 a.m. CST

    jack graham

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Wow, thanks for spoiling what happens to Dreyfuss in the movie.<p> Dick.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 7:36 a.m. CST

    why was Jerry O'Connell's severed cock hard?

    by JackGraham

    he was fighting for his life and he had a hard on .... I must try that sometime.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 7:41 a.m. CST

    You Failed

    by Black_Vulcan

    Everybody's issue isn't the points of Inception. Its that it seems like you gave short shrift to a movie while other, less interesting movies get your seal of approval with flying colors. Say what you want about Christopher Nolan, but he's tapped into a cultural zeitgeist far beyond geeks - and as head geek, you shouldn't be the one who appears to be missing the boat

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 7:48 a.m. CST

    ab snowcone

    by JackGraham

    Get over it. cock.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 8:03 a.m. CST

    Other missing stuff

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    So what about the other stuff from all the trailers that was missing? Did this undergo a really savage last minute cut?

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:06 a.m. CST

    Pirates of the Caribbean 4 teaser trailer

    by Jehovahs_Witness

    Hey fat man, wake up out of your diabetic coma and post this shit: <p> http://tinyurl.com/238n86x <p> And give me credit, too!!! ANd if one of you sees this and emails it to the fat man or one of his Jakes, you better mention it came from Jehovah's Witness or God help me you don't wanna know what I'll do to you.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:16 a.m. CST

    ????

    by dude_gimme_tabs

    Be fooled into thinking the world will end in 1975 again? Yuck, yuck, yuck!

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:33 a.m. CST

    I found it kind of dull..

    by BigTuna

    Which suiprised me. I didn't find it as fun as most did apparently. Yes, it has tons of gore and titties, but I found it poorly paced-even for a film less than 90 minutes. It has a couple of great scenes, but in between them is a bunch of "Meh" scenes.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:48 a.m. CST

    Big tuna

    by JackGraham

    Felt exactly the same. seeing titties on a big screen doesnt make me have fun. i have fun feeling real life buns, which i do often.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:50 a.m. CST

    Jehovahs witness

    by JackGraham

    i'm still waiting for some more of your obscure yet funny ramblings of the sort that appeared on the Expendables talkback a few weeks ago. cheers for the pirates teaser by the way.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:53 a.m. CST

    Jehovahs witness

    by JackGraham

    ive just watched the teaser and i'm sorry to report that teaser has been on the web for weeks, it might even have appeared on this site, i think i saw it on total film website.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 10:22 a.m. CST

    Joe Francis Threatens Jerry o'connell's Penis..

    by BigTuna

    http://thresq.hollywoodreporter.com/2010/08/piranha-3d-joe-francis-lawsuit.html

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Connecting everything to masturbations...

    by IKilledSuperman

    ...is just immature, and when elaborated like you did with the melon story, disgusting to the point of vomit-inducing. It´s one thing to be a geek. you don´t have to be a pig!

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 10:27 a.m. CST

    Oh, really, Jack.....

    by Jehovahs_Witness

    ....okay. I was out of commission during July....internet free. It was kind of nice. Either way, even if the Jakes at this site have posted that teaser, they should post it again....because it would still be more interesting than anything on this site's front page.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 1:01 p.m. CST

    So THE_CHOPPAH just called.....

    by IKilledSuperman

    He said: "Jesus."

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 1:18 p.m. CST

    Why the fuck is Harry repped by CAA?

    by alienindisguise

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 1:29 p.m. CST

    just jesus? he didnt add the christ? whoa.

    by JackGraham

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 2:48 p.m. CST

    I'm beginning to think that...

    by ccchhhrrriiisssm

    ...Harry has VERY DIFFERENT taste from the majority of the movie-going public. <p>You didn't like INCEPTION too much but you liked this "SNAKES IN A PLANE" REDUX?</p>Is it because of the boobies, Harry?

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 2:53 p.m. CST

    This review is almost as RIDICULOUS as...

    by ccchhhrrriiisssm

    ...the one with the "chocolate covered pussy juice." <p>Seriously, Harry...</p>...I don't think that you will ever live that down.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 2:56 p.m. CST

    With Harry's logic in this review...

    by ccchhhrrriiisssm

    ...he would award OSCARS for pornos.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 3:47 p.m. CST

    Scott Pilgrim and Piranha beaten by Lottery Ticket

    by parissun

    LMFAO. Also Harry says Nanny McPhee Returns is better than Inception and dreams bigger.

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:08 p.m. CST

    I've read & re-read.

    by The Dark Shite

    I STILL can't make head nor tail of this part..<p> "The PIRANHA are never real. These are epic prehistoric piranha. But they are animated to be closer to GREMLINS than predatory cock & tit eating Jesus symbols..." Wtf do "cock & tit eating" fish have to do with Jesus? Am I missing something? Or is that what they had at the last supper?

  • Aug. 23, 2010, 9:53 p.m. CST

    The Dark Shite

    by lock67ca

    It's a Harry review. Don't expect a Roger Ebert Pulitzer winning piece of literature. Never going to happen.

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 1:01 a.m. CST

    Loved it...maybe not as much as Harry though

    by badmovienite

    Thought Piranha 3D was an absolute blast. Check out my whole review at: www.badmovienite.com Twitter: @badmovienitecom

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 4:25 a.m. CST

    This movie has almost the same Rottentomatoes rating as....

    by VicenzoV

    ...Inception. <p> Not bad for a movie being marketed as the lovechild of Van Helsing and Showgirls in glorious 3d.

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 4:28 a.m. CST

    Harry ...

    by HongKongCavalier

    ... why do you continue to justify yourself to the detractors?<p></p> THEY come to YOUR site. You don't advertise, you don't offer free punch & pie, you don't use any gimmicks.<p></p> THEY come to YOU.<p></p> If someone thinks your reviews aren't up to standard (and standard you set yourself by the way), then there's the door buddy! I'm sure they can have a grand old time posting on IMDB or Rotten Tomatoes forums (the latter of which banned me personally years ago after ... count 'em ... TWO posts.)<p></p> However, what I do get is this review.<p></p> See, this review is indicative of why I can read your reviews and take them for what they are: someone who can enjoy a movie NOT by a preconceived set of standards but for what the movie offers.<p></p> THIS movie is a throwback (insert requisite twists on that phrase) to the low budget flicks that would try and compensate for their budgets by grossing out the audience (or at least trying to with budgets so low that the effects were hysterically cheesy).<p></p> All those not-so-grindhouse movies you and friends would pay $2 to see a triple feature on a Sunday after church (instead of putting the money in the collectionbasket like you were supposed to do).<p></p> People like that (me) get your review. Let the others who think aything that gets released should raise the cinematic benchmark be damned.

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 6:15 a.m. CST

    Why do people jerk off into socks?

    by Smack_Teddy

    Laziness. You get into your groove, or your mode on, but then what? You have to sit all the way up and go pull some tissues from a box or a old shirt from your draw? No, hastiness laziness and horniness means you muster up as much effort or ingenuity as you can mid act and at full attention which is to bend over and rip a sock of your foot /snatch it from your bedside and let rip. Monkey-Bastard Hands!

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 11:33 a.m. CST

    WHEN HARRY MENTIONED "RUINED SOX"- I WON'T READ THIS!!!!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 11:34 a.m. CST

    CAN'T HARRY JUST SEE A MOVIE LIKE NORMAL GEEKS??

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 11:34 a.m. CST

    I DON'T WANT TO HEAR "HARRY JIZZ STORIES" ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 11:36 a.m. CST

    THOSE SOX ARE RUINED FOREVER!!! IT'S LIKE ACID IN 'EM!!!!!!!!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 11:43 a.m. CST

    Stop with the ""Boobies""!!! THEY'RE CALL TITS, MORONS!!!!!!!!!!

    by JonChambers

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 12:55 p.m. CST

    Neck_Lucas & Seph_J two retards!!

    by piltorp75

    Harry please stop explaining yourself to these imbeciles!! They wont get that everyone does not share their fan boy facination for INCEPTION anyway. I mean YES its a really good film but if you even put in your top 100...you really need to watch some more flicks! Its not like they don´t have the time....

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 2:04 p.m. CST

    piltorp75 rapes babies

    by Seph_J

    now we're even.

  • Aug. 24, 2010, 2:31 p.m. CST

    I thought that was a good review!!

    by laguna_loire

    Harry gave me the kind of review of this particular film that I would expect, and would drive me to see it!! In other words, talking with mates over a beer, and we bring this film up, and the fact that despite the fact that its trashy, its a good gory laugh. Harry's review of Expendables was on the money (and Terry Crews ruled the scenes he was in!!), now I have to choose between this and Scott Pilgrim tomorrow night. Harry help me, they both appeal!! ARGH!!

  • Aug. 25, 2010, 4:27 a.m. CST

    "Eli's frenchy best Aja speaking mouth"

    by birdy birdman

    that, along with the sixth main paragraph, did harry have whooping cough as a baby?

  • Aug. 25, 2010, 7:39 a.m. CST

    Exactly...so watch out Seph_J

    by piltorp75

    But just babies who makes a lot of unwanted noise!

  • Aug. 25, 2010, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Hey, I'm 61 and I creamed my jeans watching this flick

    by Jymn

    Can't wait for the Blu-ray.

  • Aug. 26, 2010, 12:46 a.m. CST

    Holy Hell, 81% on Rotten Tomatoes?

    by ganymede3010

    I need to get my ass in the Theater!

  • Aug. 26, 2010, 10:09 a.m. CST

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  • Aug. 26, 2010, 12:55 p.m. CST

    My probem with AintitCool

    by Wittyninja

    I guess my issue with Harry of late is not that he enjoys bad films...because so do I on occasion, but that his reviews don't present them as bad films. They come off as raving. I've been reading this site for ten years and when I told my friend Josh I read it he said, "Why would you do that? Harry is clearly getting paid by the studios to say good things about bad films." Yikes. I would imagine that's the last thing any critic wants to hear. Do I believe it? No. Maybe. I hope not. But I must say, in the past year, I've read far too many glowing reviews of movies that just aren't that good. There's a difference between being a film snob and being true to the film. INCEPTION - for all its faults (and yes,I believe it had many) - deserved to be picked apart. PIRANHA 3D did not.

  • Aug. 27, 2010, 4:27 p.m. CST

    Piranha...

    by Blackhand2010

    Just saw it, and it was... pants... I don't expect much out of a horror movie, but one, just one likeable character would have been nice.

  • Aug. 27, 2010, 7:12 p.m. CST

    Harry, jesus... don't be honest

    by MurderMostFowl

    I don't want to think of you wacking off.... in any situation. You're like a father figure, dude You never had/hav/will have sex, and you never went solo. That's just the way it has to be. <BR><BR> Now I'm going to go sit in a corner and slowly rock back and forth and mutter.

  • Aug. 29, 2010, 8:30 a.m. CST

    piltorp75 - that was an admission.

    by Seph_J

    to <p> raping babies <p> I don't actually believe it.

  • Sept. 3, 2010, 7:34 p.m. CST

    THIS MOVIE WAS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!

    by bat725

    Just got back. Man, I had a great time. What a fun movie! Old School T&A and old school gore aplenty. It makes me forgive the CGI fish. Dreyfuss, Lloyd, and Roth make awesome cameos! Just a real fun flick. Highly Recommended!!!

  • Sept. 17, 2010, 6:48 a.m. CST

    Jordan shoe,nike Shoe,t-shirt,edhardy,handbag,watches,

    by zchjack

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  • Sept. 17, 2010, 10:09 a.m. CST

    Just now I found the time to read this talkback

    by UrbanSamurai

    And it is epic. Harry defending why he did not like Inception and dozens of TBers bashing him again and again. This is the most fun I ever had on AICN. BTW Harry, should you read this: It really is okay to not like Inception. But for me it was one of the most mind-blowing movie experiences ever. And yes, I have seen Melville and Godard and Kurosawa. I just happen to believe Inception is the best film of the last ten years. So I kinda don't understand why you only feel luke-warm about it. But it is okay. All humans are different, I guess. We are not talking about world peace vs fascism here. And I hope it is okay for you that I hate Scott Pilgrim with all my guts. Peace

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