Recently, I returned from a mission out to Los
Angeles. One of my many adventures this last time
took me to the set of.... THE GRINCH WHO
STOLE CHRISTMAS. Well...

I knew heading into this trip that I had problems with
the production. My first problem was the idea of
giving the Grinch a back story... and based on the
early script reviews I was horrified to hear about
some sort of High School background.

To me, the concept that the Grinch went to High
School just horrified me. I never thought of it in
those types of terms. Sure, within the universe of Dr
Seuss... there is most certainly an education system...
But... I didn’t want to really think about a BEVERLY
HILLS 90210 in primary colors.

I didn’t want to hear the ‘whatevers’ and the ‘that is
so dones’ and so on. To me, the Grinch was a bad
seed. Born with a heart as black as coal. That’s all I
need know. I assumed that the Grinch had lived his
whole life up in that cave, his parents abandoning him
because he was a brat, and him growing up educating
himself and becoming a self-made Grinch hating
outsiders. Content with his own existence like some
Green Guru up on high above Whoville. Till that
pesky singing came... and their off-note cheery happy
voices annoying him... piercing the privacy of his
sanctuary.... He had to silence them... so he takes
action.

But... that really is my opinion of things. It’s my
perception. My belief of what came before, and I
guess it’s these filmmaker’s choice to go in a different
direction. Afterall... whatever they do... it doesn’t
change the book at all. As a matter of fact, not one
line or sketch is diminished. It is... wholly and purely
the work of Dr Seuss.

Then another thought hit me... Imagine this... All of
us are back in 1938.... The word has just come in that
Judy Garland and not Shirley Temple, has been cast
as Dorothy Gale in the big production of Baum’s
WIZARD OF OZ.

We hear that many of the original sequences have
been cut from the film. That the director of
CAPTAINS COURAGEOUS and RED DUST has
been tapped to direct the film. It was an assignment.
Everyone agrees that Judy Garland is waaaaaay too
old to play Dorothy.

So... That was what I was taking in my mind in the
trip. I want to give Ron Howard the benefit of the
doubt going into this... but he has to be making
WIZARD OF OZ here. I mean... WILLOW wasn’t a
very good movie, and that was his only foray into the
world of fantasy. But seriously... How has APOLLO
13, RANSOM, PARENTHOOD and EDtv really
prepared Ron Howard to make this... the biggest
children’s fantasy film since WIZARD OF OZ?

I had a billion questions to be answered on set. Not
so much in an audible fashion. I needed to see what
was going on. Sit and watch Ron direct this set. See
how he handles this universe. Watch and see if the
production design was fantastical.... see if Rick
Baker was on pace with Tuttle.... How did the Who’s
look? How was their dress? Their homes? Their
vehicles? What did the Grinch’s cave look like?
What about Jim Carrey?

I woke up early the morning I was to depart to the set.
I got dressed, tied the Grinch tie that Annette
Kellerman gave me last Christmas... I was fully ready
for this adventure.

A P.A. came and picked me up at the Hotel, and as
we drove into the behind the scenes world of the
Universal Lot, I got a bit antsy. Wow.... I’m not on a
Tram. I’m behind the scenes on the Universal lot...
and I’m not on a tram. That’s really cool for me.
But, as I ride over to the set, I put on my badge which
gives me complete access all over the Grinch set.. and
I walk past the security guard. As I walk into the
studio I notice... it’s really damn cold. People are
wearing masks... breathing masks... like the type that
construction workers wear in subdivisions. Hmmm...
why?

I continue walking around, staring at the backside two
by four gridwork of the sets. A lotta lumber here.
Finally I find an entrance and walk onto the set itself.

First impressions?

Remember how big that Christmas Village at the mall
seemed when you were 4 years old. That strangely
artificial but magical shiny friendly world? I felt like
a Burl Ives puppet on a Christmas Special world.
Fake snow was falling from above, and this.... this
humoungous set. This was Whoville.

No second guessing it. It was in fact Whoville.
Only... where were the Whos?

That’s when I caught my first glimpse of a Rick
Baker WHO.

You ever seen that old Twilight Zone.... EYE OF
THE BEHOLDER? The one where a lady with a
bandaged face is talking to doctors, whose heads we
never see. We’re lead to believe that some sort of
horrifying disfiguring malady has befallen the lady.
But when we finally see her face she looks like a
babe, we’re told the operation was a failure... she
begins crying, and we pan up to see those strange
faces. Well... My instant reaction was that. Now,
Baker’s design isn’t as impressionistic as that.

In fact, as I got closer I couldn’t tell where the make
up and the person began or ended. This makeup had
pores in the skin. The top and bottom lips moved.
How was that possible? Those teeth.... those are fake,
but... How are they attached... that one is eating a
tuna sandwich... how are those teeth staying in?

Then I look, and I see a pair of Whos that I recognize
through the makeup.... Rance and Clint Howard.

As I walk over to where Rance is sitting, I marvel at
his makeup. It is... quite frankly.... stunning. He has
a beard that goes from his chin to his ankles. I’m 3
feet away and staring hard (he’s reading a book) and
each hair is apparently plugged into his Who-skin.
This is amazing. That profile... it’s nothing like
Rance Howard... But the eyes... those belong to
Rance. Without a doubt... and them bugged eyes
over there... them’s Clint’s.

About this time the publicist finds me. I tried to hide,
but I was the only human not wearing a mask.... so I
guess that kinda gave me away. Oh yeah... and
weighing 300 + lbs and being technicolor redhaired.

He introduces me to Ron, and ya know... try as I
might, I can’t get the thought out of my head....
“How are Mr and Mrs C?” Thank God I was able to
stifle the embarrassingly lame comment... but I tell
you.... It was dead on... stuck in my head.

I so completely grew up with HAPPY DAYS that
when faced with Ron, it takes immense concentration
to not say Richie... to not ask about Ralph or Potsie or
Joanie.... and the Fonz. But I managed to go the
entire day without ever making one of those
references. It’s amazing.... Ron has directed a damn
big load of films... Lotsa pretty dang good ones.
But... I can’t help but think of how he was introduced
in my mind all those years ago.

At this point... he’s setting up a shot of Jeffrey
Tambor (Mayor of Whoville) getting his earhair
trimmed by his assistant, played by Clint. Now, I
have to admit this. I had no idea whatsoever that it
was Tambor in that makeup. He was... completely
enveloped. Not to say that Clint’s makeup wasn’t
equally amazing, it is just that... well... no amount of
makeup can disguise Eaglebauer from my eyes.

I turn to watch the background players. There’s a
Who sweeping snow from some Escher-ish steps,
there’s a Rockwellian WHO Hot-dog type a thing
salesman... A lady WHO with an armful of presents.
In the far background there is a semi-Toon Town
Bugsy the Cab looking vehicle driving. I’m told that
computer snow will be added in the scene. After a bit
of watching the scene... I leave the Publicist behind
and begin exploring the set on my own.

I take out my Portable CD player, pull out my Busby
Berekley CD (#1) and begin listening to the songs of
FOOTLIGHT PARADE, 42ND STREET, GOLD
DIGGERS OF 1933 and DAMES. It’s the happy sort
of music that fits the surreal festive universe. I begin
walking about the town.... It is a town by the way...
it’s huge. Around the skyline the glowing blue of the
bluescreen acts as a perfect highlight to the buildings’
tops. I imagine the Seussian Alps... the strange birds
and clouds... I look in the WHO shop windows at
bizarre Seussian hats. A food shop loaded with
nothing but the SAM STORE sized containers of
strange foods. It seems nearly everything costs a
dollar to ten dollars.

(NOTE: I am getting really sleepy right now... it’s
4:19 am Cool Standard Time, and I must be getting
some rest. I’ll do part two either later today or
tomorrow night. There is ALOT more, but this is
1600 words as is. In the next part, I’ll talk about my
talk with Rick Baker, Ron Howard, Molly Shannon,
the Babe Who, Cindy Who’s mom... her real mom,
Kevin Mack, various Make-up types. Folks... To put
it mildly... We’ve never seen a fantasy on this type of
make-up scale. It is huge. Eating at the commisary
with over eighty Whos, the adventures in Golfcarting.
Visiting the original Lon Chaney PHANTOM OF
THE OPERA set... privately. The Grinch’s cave, the
Psycho house and the Bates Motel.... Jaws out of the
water... and much much more)