Cool News
Kiwi Zombies + Choose Your Own Adventure + Awesome Pizza = Must Watch
Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. I'm going to catch some shit for posting this as it's not strictly movie news, but it most certainly is "cool."
We all love New Zealand zombies... If you haven't seen Peter Jackson's Braindead (aka Dead Alive stateside) then you have a giant, gaping hole in your life. There's something about the laid back attitude of the Kiwis and their sense of humor that seems to mesh really well with zombie comedy.
Not only did Jackson's movie kick ass for the lord we now have what on the surface is just some advertisement for a local New Zealand pizza chain called Hell Pizza (I was a regular customer during my time in Wellington and can vouch for it. It's fucking good), but it's so much more.
For one, there's cursing, gore and a buxom blonde jiggling her way through the zombie horde. But there's also an awesome string of choices you can make as the heroic pizza guy tries to deliver some delicious pizza to a damsel in distress.
I had to share this and I kind of want to see these two leads co-star in a feature film. "I had a bat once, but some dick threw it out the window."
So enjoy this crazy zombie story and don't worry... you get a second chance if you make the wrong choice and kill our awesome comedy duo!
Thanks for Kraken and Elwood for bringing this to my attention. If you think this is a stupid thing to post, it's all their fault... If, however, you love it as much as I did then it was all me! I should go into politics!
-Quint
quint@aintitcool.com
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Readers Talkback
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It was delicious. But there were no zombies.
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a pizza on the way home -- could this be a sign?
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...because now I'm hungry for pizza,but broke. :(
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Why can't they have this place here????
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Now this IS cool. The chair or the bowling ball? The chair or the bowling ball? FUCK. I'm running out of time to decide!!!
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Cuz I never seen that movie...do I lose my geek badge or my pretentious geek badge since I havent?
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I can vouch for their GREED pizza. Good lord, it's amazing food love making in your mouth. If you ever find yourself in NZ, you must try it. Now, do I go with the scooter jump, or Indiana Jones?!
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I AM THE ZOMBIE / PIZZA DELIVERY MASTER!
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And now I'm hungry.
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Aug. 6, 2010, 4:10 p.m. CST
I won the adventure but I don't think they deliver to the U.S.
by Mike_D
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Holy hell that's cool!!
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<P> <P> <P>?
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bring this type of interactive full length feature film to the actual movie theater. hook up some buttons to the chairs, everybody votes and the higher % wins. it'd be kinda sorta rocky horror like.
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It was not a very cerebal type of experience but it was more cerebal than JJ Abrams' Stupid Trek. Ass fuck! Fuck ass! Ass fuck! Zombie assfuckery!<p>Testify!
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Buxom gals = proof God exists. And God is male.
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Every second buxom wench is in shot = excellent<p> Every second beard guy is in shot = annoying<p> But on balance between buxom wench and beard guy I think it just scrapes an excellent.<p>
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If I was trapped in zombie apocalypse with her then i'd survive on her breast milk and she'd survive on my spunk. Happy days!
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You sir are a very nasty nasty gentleman...like me. :)
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Some really funny stuff in them.
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Indeed Dick, we always knew where the line was drawn...<p> AND YOU JUST STEPPED OVER IT BUDDY BOY!
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and their sense of humor. How is a generalization like this not worse than saying "all black people are lazy" or "Jews are greedy and neurotic"? Quint is a casual racist.
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I must admit Hell's Pizza ain't the best Pizza back home but they sure know how to sell pizza's.A few years ago they got in trouble for giving away condons in the mail while advertising their lust pizza and seem too piss of the Morality Police every year.I miss kiwi talk "Stink" cracked me up.
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Bruce, are you from downunder?!<p> Cos from your name I never would have suspected.
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Quint is racist for saying New Zealanders have a laid back attitude? That's a pretty fucking massive leap you've taken there!
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StarryNight, please don't label me a casual racist for the above comment.<p> Tho a lactation fetishist from the earlier comment would be a fair cop.
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About 30 minutes down the drain. But definitely cool!
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Cobra--Kai my mother was a fucking Comedian.And i know my pizza in my younger dayz me and my flatmates filled a room with beer and pizza boxes cause we were too lazy to take them outside for recycling.
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I ordered a plain pizza with extra cheese and, when the pizza delivery guy arrived, i was incredibly pleased to see that not only was there lots of meat on him but that he smelt of cooked sausage.<p>He was one of my most favorite toppings. I still have some of him left in my freezer.
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to drink your ovaltine?
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Bruce, good on yer mate. And good on yer ma.<p> We've only got one planet talkbackers. RECYLE!
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Aug. 6, 2010, 5:24 p.m. CST
I'm finally eating my pizza. Not "Hell's Pizza" but pizza anyway
by Mike_D
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Dr_Satan, you ate the pizza boy's sausage?<p>
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Mike_D what topping you go for?<p> Call my taste buds crazy but I enjoy tuna and pineapple.
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Indeed I did. And I washed it down with a nice glass of red wine.<p>I'm not gay, however. I have also cooked and eaten lovely full breasts in my time.
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If I'm reading between the lines, the movie is far above his means to review it properly, might have went clear over his head. So he tapped out of it with the excuse of falling asleep and being busy with Comic-Con. The next you'll hear about it is when he's writing his blurb for the Blu-Ray release and it'll be something like "I fell asleep during my first viewing, can't wait to check this out again on my PS3!!!1111"
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Vern's ... http://tinyurl.com/32mzd5b
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Dr_Satan, don't you hate it when you carve into a big juicy boob, smothered in gravy, you slip that quivering morsel into your mouth only to taste... silicone - blurgh!<p> www.cannibalsforbignaturals.com
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Their pizza boxes fold into coffins!
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and the kumara fries (that's sweet potato fries to the uninitiated) are great!
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"Welcome to Hell."
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Relax guys, he just posted this yesterday on Twitter: "ok, finally saw ALL of INCEPTION, and have a full opinion to write about".. So be patient :P
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I think they're pretty good pizzas, better than dominos + pizza hut (cheapest stores) I love this kind of advertising and all their promo stuff, nice change to have character
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I loved Hell when I was in NZ. Tasty toppings, hellish stores, kumara fries, and pizza boxes that fold into little coffins.
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He's a cyborg you idiot!
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Duh, dat wuz neato! Duh.. I like da pretty colahhs and stuff on da screen. Duuh.. I di-nnt see avatar da whole way threw in da pictcha show dere needah. Thar.... Duuurrrr... Duuuhhhh.. I seen all of dem obscure pieces uh shit dat dem mystery science guys make fun of only I tink dey r guud mooveez but I don like ta see dem blockbusta type daaaarrrrrr......
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I like a place called Pizza Port. There are actually a few Pizza Ports. The one I go to is in a place called Solana Beach. Their website's http://pizzaport.com They have a mural behind their brewery that represents the local area and also some of their beers, so they have a smiling shark holding up a beer off the coast to represent Sharkbite Red, and there's some skeleton further off the coast chugging something called Old Boneyards to represent their barleywine. But I rarely drink their alcoholic beverages when I'm there.
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I know a handful of them. Yes, the people, not the birds.
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although I always took the wrong turn. Definitely has that weird Braindead vibe. Although sometimes I cannot understand the fuck they're talking about...
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Reminds me of Cinemax.
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i loved this, it was funny, bloody and brilliant. those kiwis are hillarioius.
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The check must not have cleared.
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When I was in Wellington post King Kong I remember laughing at the name, but thinking they were very creative with their ads and commercials. I don't remember eating there though...
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and Dead Alive is the epitome of suckage. A total waste of time.
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Ate too much of it and now I can't stand it. I recommend Hell Pizza Lake Road Belmont North Shore City.
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We had a place in the people's republic of Davis called "Murder Burger", but they forced 'em to change the name so now It's called REDRUM. you're welcome
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Well, on the next Episode, they do somehow have to survive and escape.
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I live in NZ and to be honest Hell isn't that good - I worked at a place where they feed us Hell every night and I have tried everything on the menu. Honestly, the aftertaste is all the same and your shit still stinks something rotten. Pepe's Pizza on High St Lower Hutt FTW
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that's just about all that stood out in that vid
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Wait- what? They have a ladder! WHY DIDN'T THEY USE THE LADDER???
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Because the girl's box was surrounded by zombies. Unless you meant 'use the ladder as a bridge' which was my thought as well.
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I'm from NZ and I freckin lovie hellpizzza!! And these latest ads are so awesome, I haven't check'd em out but i had Hellpiza yesterday!
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Friday night is Hell Pizza night at our place - frickin’ best in town!! Love the ad and the zombie-to-cleavage ratio is juuust right....
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