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ROLLERCOASTER TYCOON Movie Inexplicably In Development...

Beaks here...

From the director of PINK PANTHER 2 and the writers of NORBIT comes the totally uncalled-for ROLLERCOASTER TYCOON: THE MOTION PICTURE! Despite being a massively profitable series of video games for Atari (to the tune of $300 million), I've no idea why anyone would think this property is the stuff of great cinema. The whole "fun" of the game is meticulously constructing gargantuan thrill rides - which you then wipe out in spectacularly grotesque fashion. According to Heat Vision, the film will be a "live-action/CGI hybrid", which suggests to me that they'll probably go the 3D route as well. But could the experience of a 3D rollercoaster movie ever be superior to one presented in glorious, theater-crumbling Sensurround?
As intimated above, the film will be directed by Harald Zwart (whose KARATE KID remake is allegedly better than it should be), and written by David Ronn and Jay Scherick. Sony will foot the bill.

Readers Talkback
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  • May 13, 2010, 12:54 p.m. CST

    No Ghostbuster 3 comic news?I´m out.......

    by theDannerDaliel

  • May 13, 2010, 12:54 p.m. CST

    Who Comes Up With This Crap?

    by Dave I

    The guy who thinks Rubik's Cube or Magic 8-Ball are good ideas?

  • May 13, 2010, 12:55 p.m. CST


    by bat725

    They're making Pac-Man and Zombie Beatles flicks, for fuck's sake! Nothing's inexplicable these days.

  • May 13, 2010, 12:58 p.m. CST

    Hey i loved those videogames.

    by ominus

    another favorite of mine was Theme Hospital.ofc Simcity was the we are stuck with the stupid Sims played only by girls.crap.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:02 p.m. CST

    Just played...

    by bobbyperusteeth

    ...a delightful online game called DON'T SHIT YOUR PANTS! The objective is simple. You have 30 seconds to reach a toilet and empty your bowels. One wrong command and you will SHIT YOUR PANTS. If you SHIT YOUR PANTS it is game over.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:03 p.m. CST

    Good movie ideas are rare commodity...

    by tomimt

    ... hence the Monopoly and other silly ideas.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:06 p.m. CST

    You know I actually invented...

    by JayLenoTookMyJob

    ...the Rollercoaster Tycoon idea along with a co-worker and programmer in the early 90's. We used it in a series of education software to illustrate principles of ergonomics and physics. Of course the game developers didn't steal it, they just came up with the same idea some years later and used it for an entertaining game instead of education. Now they're living in mansions and eating foie gras and I'm living in a semi-ghetto and eating Cheesy Mac. Education never pays, BTW. Go for the lucre!

  • May 13, 2010, 1:10 p.m. CST


    by bobbyperusteeth

    Don't feel bad man. Cheer yourself up with a nice game of DON'T SHIT YOUR PANTS!

  • May 13, 2010, 1:12 p.m. CST

    truth or dare movie!

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    bunch of kids doin wild shit while revealin deep dark secrets... thats gold...

  • May 13, 2010, 1:14 p.m. CST

    Hollywood can't find the money to do Anchorman 2 but

    by SifoDyasJr.

    they can fund crap like this?

  • May 13, 2010, 1:17 p.m. CST

    This will be the "Twister" of the decade

    by EddieMurphysLaugh

  • May 13, 2010, 1:22 p.m. CST

    Oh, it's explicable

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    There's plenty of dumb mother fuckers stumbling around that would pay to see something like that.</p><p>But it seems to me you could do something really interesting like a Tim Burton The Sims or Peter Jackson Civilization. But no, they stick with cheap stupidity like this or Bratz, just something they can slap together and call "a movie", then push it out to a few theaters just as an excuse to make up reviewer cover splashes, then zip it off to DVD at Toys R Us for the kids to whine for, or even better, confuse someone to buy it thinking they are buying the game!

  • May 13, 2010, 1:22 p.m. CST

    Minesweeper: The Movie

    by Royston Lodge

    See the trailer here:<p><p> (remove spaces as required)

  • May 13, 2010, 1:23 p.m. CST


    by JonChambers


  • May 13, 2010, 1:27 p.m. CST

    SimCopter combined with SimCity 2000 was the BEST.

    by Royston Lodge

    First, build your city in SimCity2000, then fly around in SimCopter putting out fires, chasing criminals, delivering patients to hospital, etc.<p> And if your city had a military base, you could get an Apache and start firing missles at all the buildings.<p> Heh heh heh...

  • May 13, 2010, 1:28 p.m. CST

    I remember Rollercoaster being better than any movie

    by skimn

    named Rollercoaster deserved to be, thanks in no small part to George Segal. Not surprising that Hollywood will try to duplicate the sensation of an amusement park ride through CGI and possibly 3D. Look at the mine car chase in Temple Of Doom. ILM tried to duplicate the rollercoaster feeling in the POV shots.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:32 p.m. CST

    Sony will have a massive tax write-ff.

    by Magnus Greel

  • May 13, 2010, 1:35 p.m. CST

    Coming next Summer!!

    by professor murder

    Chips Challenge! The Movie!

  • May 13, 2010, 1:37 p.m. CST

    at least Cheesy Mac's delicious

    by JackSlater4

  • May 13, 2010, 1:39 p.m. CST

    Can we get Fruit Roll Up the movie going?

    by JackSlater4

    Gogurt maybe?

  • May 13, 2010, 1:40 p.m. CST

    The adventures of Kool-Aid

    by JackSlater4

  • May 13, 2010, 1:40 p.m. CST

    Cap'n Crunch: The Motion Picture

    by JackSlater4

  • May 13, 2010, 1:43 p.m. CST

    Coming next fall...Coffee Table, the Movie

    by ctbrandon

    Brought to you by the makers of Washing Machine, and the Paint Dry Trilogy.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:47 p.m. CST

    Tilt-A-Whirl: The Saga Continues

    by RETURN_of_FETT

  • May 13, 2010, 1:52 p.m. CST

    Uniball: Origins

    by JackSlater4

  • May 13, 2010, 1:55 p.m. CST

    Galaga would be better.

    by gotilk

    I always felt there were some deep emotional seeds to be sown and cultivated in that material. Can you imagine the sweeping strings swelling in the background as our hero FINALLY gets that weapons power-up? Kubrickian.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:56 p.m. CST

    Brittanica: Based on Encyclopedia Brittanica

    by JackSlater4

    by Various Contributing Authors

  • May 13, 2010, 1:57 p.m. CST

    DRAGONBALL A: The Beginning

    by RETURN_of_FETT

  • May 13, 2010, 1:58 p.m. CST

    ASS:The Movie.

    by gotilk

    I guess that really is the logical next step. "Not just for fags" would be its tagline.

  • May 13, 2010, 1:58 p.m. CST

    DICTIONARY: A True Story

    by RETURN_of_FETT

  • May 13, 2010, 1:59 p.m. CST

    UTERUS in smell-o-vision!

    by RETURN_of_FETT

  • May 13, 2010, 2:11 p.m. CST

    What Uwe Boll run out of video games to make into crap films?

    by impossibledreamers

    Wow. No story. No characters. No explosions. No Shooting. This a low-budget producers dream!!

  • May 13, 2010, 2:12 p.m. CST

    "which you then wipe out"

    by satriales

    In the game you build a theme park with an emphasis on coasters but you don't wipe them out in a 'spectacularly grotesque fashion'. The closest you can get to that is opening the ride without completing the track, or designing the track so that two trains crash into each other.

  • May 13, 2010, 2:15 p.m. CST

    Populous.....The Movie.

    by cookylamoo

    Two Gods....Michael Douglas and Russel Crowe pit two primitive tribes against each other each employing divine intervention to cause catastrophic earthquakes,and plagues.

  • May 13, 2010, 2:16 p.m. CST

    How about a biopic from Helen Kellers point of view?

    by JackSlater4

  • May 13, 2010, 2:16 p.m. CST

    So long as I haven't seen any of these

    by SemenStains

    movies yet, they don't exist as far as I'm concerned. In fact, they may be coverup titles for major films like Blue Harvest was for Star Wars. Think about it, don't you find it suspicious that Ridley Scott of all directors would take on fuckin' MONOPOLY?

  • May 13, 2010, 2:34 p.m. CST

    Shit: Based on the novel Crap by Asshole

    by I_shot_Cyrus

  • May 13, 2010, 2:38 p.m. CST

    "Pixels" Short

    by Trannyformers_Apologist

    Adam Sandler to Turn "Pixels" Short into Feature Film

  • May 13, 2010, 2:42 p.m. CST


    by redkamel

  • May 13, 2010, 2:42 p.m. CST


    by redkamel

  • May 13, 2010, 2:45 p.m. CST

    The Sims! The movie!

    by ricarleite2

    Just get an Hungarian film about daily life, and don't subtitle or dub it. Add green diamonds over the characters heads.

  • May 13, 2010, 2:49 p.m. CST

    From the Director of Pink Panther 2 and the Writers of Norbit...

    by Lord Elric

    That alone just sends a chill down my spine. Sure this isn't going to be a horror movie?

  • May 13, 2010, 3:33 p.m. CST

    What was the pitch?

    by Adelai Niska

    There's rollercoasters! And guy who owns 'em!

  • May 13, 2010, 3:39 p.m. CST

    They ARE making The Sims

    by terry1978

    Not so funny now, is it?

  • May 13, 2010, 3:43 p.m. CST

    That's it. Movies are DONE

    by TheGreatHomsar

    It's been a fun century or so. Time to move on.

  • May 13, 2010, 4:05 p.m. CST

    POG's : the motion picture

    by liljuniorbrown

    It's the best i could do. It could never top Shit,based on the novel crap by ASSHOLE. Funniest thing i've read all day.

  • May 13, 2010, 4:09 p.m. CST

    RTC is more addicting than crack...

    by replica

  • May 13, 2010, 4:20 p.m. CST


    by frozen01

    Yep, it's not just you. While I was watching Idiocracy I thought it was incredibly stupid, almost painful to watch. But then, my hubby and I started talking about it afterwards. We were nearly pissing ourselves we were laughing so hard. Amazing concept, poor execution.

  • May 13, 2010, 4:27 p.m. CST


    by yourSTEPDADDY

    ....get some!

  • May 13, 2010, 4:43 p.m. CST


    by JackSlater4

    I can't access that node for reasons I can't get into, the answers would only lead to more questions.<P> But, I will help you claim a current talkback for Supernatural tomorrow, after the finale.

  • May 13, 2010, 4:44 p.m. CST

    Inexplicably? Not really, I mean

    by Gungan Slayer

    we've got shit projects like MONOPOLY, BATTLESHIP, and CANDYLAND in development. Can't see how Rollercoster Tycoon is any worse.

  • May 13, 2010, 4:57 p.m. CST


    by ORIONgods

    everyone knows a ZOO TYCOON movie is were the money is..

  • May 13, 2010, 5:24 p.m. CST

    I saw that thing in SENSURROUND!

    by zacUpquark

    It was crap. Sensurround didn't help, and in fact was ridiculously distracting. It was also used in Earthquake (obviously) and Midway, which would have been great, except every explosion was the same huge boom, wheather a grenade, or a carrier exploding. Now, there was the time I was watching Bambi, and just at the forest fire, the sensurround next door went off (they put sensurround in a multiplex?!?) and all the animals ran from it.

  • May 13, 2010, 5:53 p.m. CST

    First !

    by oborostyle

    just kidding.

  • May 13, 2010, 6:23 p.m. CST

    We need the sequel to "The Dark Knight"... and fast.

    by dcsmith

    This might help:

  • May 13, 2010, 7:26 p.m. CST

    Super Fucking Natural

    by liljuniorbrown

    I can't wait to see where thats going tonight. Anybody that hasn't watched that show you are missing out. Check it out this summer on netflix or something. Two bad asses driving around in a bad ass car shooting demons and shit all set to a classic rock soundtrack. To top it off there dad is none other than "the comedian" himself. Anybody that likes movies like Fright Night,Evil Dead,Dream Warriors and the Phantasm series would get a kick out of this show. It takes the best parts of those movies and has some of the best writting on television.

  • May 13, 2010, 7:55 p.m. CST

    What's up with the O.J. Biopic?

    by I_shot_Cyrus

    OJ: If the glove fits

  • May 13, 2010, 8:14 p.m. CST

    So Jeffrey Dean Morgan just called...

    by JackSlater4

    he said to give us a Supernatural talkback for the finale

  • May 13, 2010, 8:30 p.m. CST

    The love for Rollercoaster

    by m_prevette

    is well deserved. It was marketed as a big ass disaster movie but it's really a tight cat & mouse game with some good tension - and Segal aces it with his weary smart assed role. Great thriller from Levinson/Link

  • May 13, 2010, 10:16 p.m. CST

    I was in "Rollercoaster"

    by jawsfan

    No shit. The opening scenes were shot at Ocean View Amusement Park in Norfolk, VA. I lived there at the time and am an extra in the crowd scenes. Good movie, too.

  • May 13, 2010, 10:43 p.m. CST

    So are all these video/board game movies...

    by tangcameo

    ...being produced by one movie company? I just want to now which big corporation is going to implode like a cold fusion bomb.

  • May 13, 2010, 10:56 p.m. CST

    KARATE KID remake is allegedly better than it should be

    by Riff_Randell

    Uh.. no. And what the hell does the trailer for 'Rollercoaster' have to do with RT? BTW, hubby has that one on dvd.

  • May 14, 2010, 1:14 a.m. CST

    I vaguely recall when my family went

    by Dingbatty

    to Epcot when it first opened that they had a program on a touchscreen that let you choose and string together segments of a wireframe coaster, and at the end it showed a first person animation of the ride.

  • May 14, 2010, 2:51 a.m. CST

    I much preferred Railroad Tycoon

    by Johnno

    It was fun watching trains go up and down. But inevitably you get bored of the pacing and start using cheat codes to get the Japanese Bullet train during the wild west era and watch the dough start rolling in. Anyway I personally can't wait for an Age of Empires Movie! They should make each one starting with the Egyptians tutorial level from the first game and build their way up to the Age of Kings expansion pack. Age II was the height of the series for me. I want them to properly film the resource gathering and building constructions and I want to see the little bars on the screen in 3-D indicating the progress of my siege weapons until you've hit you population limit and then there's nothing left to do but to highlight your entire infantry and horsemen and head straight for the walls of the red enemy.

  • May 14, 2010, 5:58 a.m. CST

    Give us Uncharted or God of War first, Sony!

    by Mr Nicholas

  • May 14, 2010, 7:31 a.m. CST

    This will be the BEST movie ever!!!

    by skywise404

    I'm not kidding. It has epicness written all over it. If only i had thought of it first i could die happy but as it stands i will only serve the world better by performing sepeku. Goodbye cruel world.

  • May 14, 2010, 9:32 a.m. CST


    by Sailor Rip

    Actually on Seinfeld they were planning a Coffee Table movie based off Kramer's coffee table book about coffee tables. And get this, the book had little fold out legs on it that turned it into......wait for it....a coffee table.

  • May 14, 2010, 11:16 a.m. CST

    Light Bulb: The Motion Picture

    by SK229

    To start the film, the projectionist would turn the projector off and everyone would sit in a dark theater for two hours... critics thrill at the irony. The movie, you see, is about Hollywood's appalling lack of originality and new ideas.

  • May 14, 2010, 1:09 p.m. CST


    by Darth Macchio

    Nobody has even talked about making fucking Hungry Hungry Hippos. I'm thinking Paul Greengrass. Fast Edits. Shaky cam galore. And giant multi-colored hippos eating white spherical objects incessantly. Throw some tits in there somewhere and viola: goldmine.

  • May 14, 2010, 10:38 p.m. CST

    Zoo Tycoon: the motion picture in 3D!

    by mistergreen

  • May 15, 2010, 11:37 a.m. CST

    roller coaster database

    by cyberskunk

    A terrific database of world-wide roller coasters is available at I must confess I usually enjoy looking at them more than riding them. On roller coasters, I can feel nauseated easily. I've never vomited from being on one, but the California Screamin' ride at California Adventure or the GhostRider at Knott's Berry Farm (or Montezooma's Revenge) are enough to make me sit down and feel bad for awhile. I have solved this problem somewhat by taking dramamine beforehand. I really enjoyed Rock'n'Roller Coaster at Disney's MGM Studios.

  • May 15, 2010, 4:36 p.m. CST

    Still no love for HALF-LIFE, huh?

    by MrMysteryGuest

  • May 15, 2010, 6:07 p.m. CST


    by Arcadian Del Sol

    actually, I'd probably want to see that.

  • May 16, 2010, 4:26 p.m. CST

    A simulation program for theaters that show this film...

    by Triple_J_72

    ...would have no people in it. Ever.

  • May 17, 2010, 3:38 a.m. CST

    New horrors! New horrors!

    by njscribe44

    Classic Harlan Ellison line from his essays ("Glass Teat" collection). Seriously, WTF?!?