Ain't It Cool News (www.aintitcool.com)
Coaxial

DRAG ME TO HELL!! TRUCKER!! VICKY CRISTINA!! HANGOVER!! GIRLFRIEND EXPERIENCE!! TRANSFORMERS! LAND OF THE LOST!! May Premieres!!

I am – Hercules!! These movies may be new to cable in May. Scores from the top critics at Rotten Tomatoes and Metacritic are added to help sort out movies viewers might be keen to pursue. The titles are arranged chronologically by cable premiere date to make it most useful to people with DVRs:

FIVE MINUTES OF HEAVEN Showtime Extreme May 1 RT: 44 MC: 62

ICE AGE: DAWN OF THE DINOSAURS HBO May 1 RT: 32 MC: 50

MEDICINE FOR THE MELANCHOLY Showtime May 1 RT: 92 MC: 63

TRUCKER Starz May 1 RT: 57 MC: 61

ZACK AND MIRI MAKE A PORNO Showtime May 1 RT: 49 MC: 56

IGOR Showtime May 2 RT: 17 MC: 40

SHORTS HBO May 6 RT: 58 MC: 53

THE SPIRIT Showtime May 7 RT: 7 MC: 30

BEYOND A REASONABLE DOUBT Starz May 8 RT: 0 MC: 35

THE GIRLFRIEND EXPERIENCE Showtime May 8 RT: 52 MC: 66

LAND OF THE LOST HBO May 8 RT: 21 MC: 32

PANDORUM Starz May 8 RT: 40 MC: 28

VICKY CRISTINA BARCELONA Showtime May 8 RT: 82 MC: 70

THE HANGOVER HBO May 15 RT: 78 MC: 73

TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN Cinemax May 15 RT: 16 MC: 35

LORNA’S SILENCE Starz May 19 RT: 95 MC: 80

TREELESS MOUNTAIN Sundance May 19 RT: 70 MC:

DRAG ME TO HELL Cinemax May 22 RT: 88 MC: 83

MY SISTER’S KEEPER HBO May 22 RT: 44 MC: 51

VISUAL ACOUSTICS Sundance May 24 RT: 83 MC: 67

MY LIFE IN RUINS Cinemax May 29 RT: 8 MC: 34

THE STEPFATHER Starz May 29 RT: 13 MC: 33

BROTHERS AT WAR Starz May 31 RT: 75 MC: 60
Find the list of April premieres here. Find the list of March premieres here. Find the list of February premieres here.
Follow Herc on Twitter!! Follow Evil Herc on Twitter!!

All seasons of “Deep Space Nine,”
“Voyager,” and “Enterprise” are momentarily $36.99 Each!! 47% Off!!

74 Blu-rays Under $10!!

Readers Talkback
comments powered by Disqus
    + Expand All
  • April 30, 2010, 8:52 p.m. CST

    Is Kingdon of Crystal Skull ever coming to cable?

    by fiester

    It's been two years.

  • April 30, 2010, 9:14 p.m. CST

    Crystal Skull

    by Hercules

    and Iron Man are both on Paramount's new pay channel, Epix, available on Cox Cable, Fios and coming soon to Dish.

  • April 30, 2010, 9:31 p.m. CST

    Epix-HD is on Dish Network

    by bierce

    ...as of last Monday.

  • April 30, 2010, 9:44 p.m. CST

    Ah, did not know that. Thank you.

    by fiester

    I have Comcast and no Epix channel that I'm aware of exists on it.

  • April 30, 2010, 9:45 p.m. CST

    It's weird, Showtime has been advertising...

    by Shermdawg

    ...Valkyrie for months now, but not once did I see a mention for Zack & Miri, or The Spirit. But then again, with a RT meter of 7, it's no wonder.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:28 p.m. CST

    Wow.

    by The Bicycle Sharer

    Really? Waiting for "Crystal Skull?" Seriously? To each his own, I guess. I'd just about rather choke down a vomit shake with extra chunks than watch that again.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:28 p.m. CST

    I thought for sure that...

    by Darkman

    ...given the impending sequel, IRON MAN would've premiered next month. Showtime owes me an explanation. In the meantime, here's to the cable premieres of IGOR, THE SPIRIT and ZACK AND MIRI.

  • May 1, 2010, 12:59 a.m. CST

    Showtime sucks...

    by Ronald Raygun

    I remember back when I was in middle school, our cable service screwed up and we inexplicably got Showtime for free. Even then, I never watched it.

  • May 1, 2010, 3:10 a.m. CST

    thanks herc !

    by ottomatic

    for this column and the info on Ironman/crystal skull being on epix.

  • May 1, 2010, 6:16 a.m. CST

    How about...

    by Catnip_Thieves

    putting actual links to the RT / MC pages, rather than just more diversions to Amazon? Fucking shills.

  • May 1, 2010, 8:09 a.m. CST

    Showtime premiering movies so late...

    by Bullet_time_Facehugger

    I'll never understand why Showtime premieres things a year and a half after they're theatrical run. Especially when HBO, Cinemax and STARZ have all resorted to premiering things 9 to 10 months after its theatrical run. I guess thats why Paramount and Lionsgate started EPIX. They must've got tired of their shit playing long after everyone stopped giving a crap about it.

  • May 1, 2010, 8:17 a.m. CST

    I hate Rotten Tomatoes

    by tonagan

    It just seems like a lazy way for people to back up their opinions - "I must be right because Rotten Tomatoes agrees with me. Wah."

  • May 1, 2010, 9:32 a.m. CST

    I like this feature

    by c4andmore

    Thanks. That is all.

  • May 1, 2010, 10:01 a.m. CST

    I LOVE The Girlfriend Experience

    by ZoeFan

    It's a great "experimental" movie. I call it that because it's not a true movie (@ only about 75 minutes in length). And Sasha Grey (yes Porn Star Sasha Grey) blew me away with her acting ability (no pun intended).

  • May 1, 2010, 10:06 a.m. CST

    Sasha Grey

    by c4andmore

    plus she takes it in the pooper.

  • May 1, 2010, 10:44 a.m. CST

    = best ass on the planet.

    by Flip63Hole

    Next to mine, of course.

  • May 1, 2010, 2:33 p.m. CST

    I think people are blinded by Sasha Grey being...

    by Jaka

    ...in The Girlfriend Experiment. I want that 75 minutes of my life back. I'm a HUGE Soderbergh fan and I absolutely loath that mess. Could barely keep myself awake. <P>Don't have Epix (yet) here on Comcast in the Bay Area, either.<P>Actually pretty excited for Five Minutes of Heaven, Trucker and Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Also, cable is the only way I ever watched the previous Ice Age films. So I suppose I'll check that one out, too. And maybe now a few more people will finally see Zack and Miri... ehh, probably not.

  • May 1, 2010, 2:33 p.m. CST

    Oh yeah...

    by Jaka

    ...like this column.

  • May 1, 2010, 3:46 p.m. CST

    Netflix FTW!!

    by Stalkeye

    It's good to get Movies 4-5 Months after their theatrical release.With Cable, it's for the most part a full fucking year or more. To hell with that.

  • May 1, 2010, 4:29 p.m. CST

    Best thing on the site

    by LostMythos

    are these premiere date posts... it would be great if they covered whether something is on the HD channels though...

  • May 1, 2010, 6:58 p.m. CST

    SHOWTIME is exceptional

    by film11

    SHOWTIME is the ONLY pay channel that shows movies OAR. Those of you looking to see CRYSTAL SKULL or IRON MAN (on the TERRIBLE Epix channel...and the wait for new films is just as long as it was with SHOWTIME. The wait is due to the studios...not SHOWTIME) or TRANSFORMERS 2, etc. can watch them with at least one-third or more of the picture missing. At least on SHOWTIME, the movies are presented as seen in theaters. I've dumped HBO and passed on EPIX but I'll never drop SHOWTIME.

  • May 1, 2010, 6:59 p.m. CST

    To DARKMAN...Showtime's explanation

    by film11

    Showtime does not have the rights to IRON MAN. But you can see the cropped version on EPIX.

  • May 1, 2010, 9:30 p.m. CST

    Starz OnDemand often has widescreen...

    by Jaka

    ...available.

  • May 1, 2010, 9:49 p.m. CST

    People still watch movies on cable?

    by RPLocke

    Why am I still paying to watch year old movies?

  • May 1, 2010, 11:38 p.m. CST

    Dish subscriber here...

    by Darkman

    And I've not seen hide nor hair of Epix.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:21 a.m. CST

    Jaka

    by film11

    ...yes, but not in HD. All HD movies are cropped on that channel (Except for Pixar films...I guess they don't give Starz a choice, God bless 'em!).

  • May 2, 2010, 12:23 p.m. CST

    Cable premieres??

    by Lazarus Long

    It wasn't enough to be pimping DVD releases on a daily basis, now this? Herc's output for this site is like 95% shilling and 5% analysis/news.

  • May 2, 2010, 2:34 p.m. CST

    Pandorum was...

    by Judge Briggs

    actually decent. I really enjoyed it. Anyone else? Man, Showtime pretty much takes up that entire list.

  • May 2, 2010, 3:48 p.m. CST

    Zack and Miri

    by Mel Garga

    Meh, not so much. I did learn how the 'Dutch Rudder' works, though. Plus, the film featured an awesome song by Live. Naturally, it's not available on the soundtrack.