Review

Harry says this NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET was effin' awesome & creepy as all fuck!

Published at: April 29, 2010, 6:14 a.m. CST by headgeek

Last night, at the after party for IRON MAN 2, Moriarty (or as he is now calling himself, Drew McWeeny), told me he’d seen the new NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and he felt it really wasn’t much of anything, but then went on a long rant about how shitty Ridley Scott’s ROBIN HOOD was – and how the combination of the two films almost made him wish to give up writing about film. SO – to say I went into tonight’s screening with a great deal of trepidation is very accurate. We had the Platinum Dunes dudes coming in. Some hot shot commercial director that I wasn’t familiar with. And then Jackie Earle Haley, someone that was the reason I was throwing this event was coming, but he would be leaving before the post-film Q&A. That was my only relief going into this screening. If it sucked, it’d be a whole lot easier to be as mean as I would need to be if I loathed the film an inkling of what I felt going in. You see. I fucking love FREDDY KRUEGER movies. I like JASON and MICHAEL MYERS… but Krueger is the badass of modern horror. Freddy has scared me, entertained me, disturbed me and yes… he’s even given me nightmares. But I love nightmares. I love being scared. I love getting “ick’d out”! I love that creepy unfair way that Krueger is. I love that the characters have to learn to fight him in a dream world. I love that Krueger is a mystery for each kid to solve. What is he? Who is he? Why me? And… how do you stop a dream monster that is waiting for you to just shut your eyes? As a horror geek, I’ve spent, literally, COUNTLESS hours discussing and talking about Freddy Krueger with any and all fans of Freddy that have populated my life – and there are many. My single favorite event that I’ve ever partnered with Tim League on was the last time Robert Englund played the character in FREDDY VS JASON at CAMP HACKNSLASH – when we had Robert there. How big a Freddy geek am I? I spent an inordinate amount of money for a pair of size 12 Freddy Nikes – and I’ve kept them in great shape – although when I asked my wife where they were today, it turns out they were in the Laundry room covered in cobwebs. Kinda perfect really. FREDDY KRUEGER has been in cobwebs. In a way, of every character needing a remake or being faced with an inevitable remake – Krueger was both the most painful to conceive of – but also the ideal character to reinvent. Platinum Dunes has made their very best film by leaps and bounds with A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. And the resulting film was as if every other film they’ve done, they learned from every mistake and actually stumbled across exactly what they’ve been needing. A film with a purpose for being remade. I honestly feel that this is a very smart film. Smart in so many ways – and that’s not something I can really say about the Platinum Dunes movies. They make handsome looking remakes, but smart remakes? The best thing they did in the CHAINSAW remakes was to bring R Lee Ermey into the mix. With AMITYVILLE – it was hiring Ryan Reynolds. In the FRIDAY THE 13TH remake – it was the Dock death. But with A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET – it is just about everything. More than ever before this is a HORROR MYSTERY. Freddy is all at once, scary, sardonically funny and powerfully sympathetic. Jackie Earle Haley plays Fred Krueger as a human being. And he plays Freddy as pretty much a nightmare. They bring us face to face with the true monster of Freddy Krueger which wasn’t the hand knives, wasn’t the dream powers… it was that Fred Krueger was a child molester. (No, they don’t SHOW that) But they give you scenes that will give you the creeps – while also giving you enough to believe that it may be possible that Krueger was burned alive for something that could very well have been the concoctions of pre-school age children. After all… there was no trial of Fred Krueger. No kids on a stand pointing to where on a doll they’d been touched. No jury of his peers. No day in court for Mr Krueger. No, this was always a case of vigilante justice by the involved parents – then hushed up, forgotten and put away. This was the shame of a community of people. A modern day lynching essentially, but it resulted in a man being burned alive. There are aspects of Jackie’s performance that reminded me of Peter Lorre in Fritz Lang’s towering work in “M”. Jackie goes to places that Englund was never really allowed to explore. Freddy’s punishment was never questioned before. Nor were Krueger’s motivations in killing the Elm Street kids. There’s actual new material being presented into the mythology that I really really love. The movie actually introduces notions that I’ve never really thought about before with a character that I’ve given a shitload of thought to. Englund’s Krueger had become a “Horror host” with some really nasty moments with victims. He was all about the relish and the cowardice. And I LOVE THAT about Englund’s take on the character. But with Jackie Earle Haley… he absolutely makes Krueger a Monster again. Englund’s eyes dance, Jackie’s drill holes through the characters. He has eyes that would paralyze you. And they take delight & there’s a handful of relish to him too, but there is no doubt about it… he means to really and seriously fuck up his victims. There’s a rage and even a look of innocence while doing it. This Freddy has a delight that isn’t quite like anything I’ve seen before. It isn’t a better Freddy exactly, it is just… Wholly new. Looking at stills of the character in makeup doesn’t really begin to show what they’ve done here. There is more pain in the face of Krueger than was there before. The best effect of all – are Jackie’s eyes. They seem to be lidless, unblinking and serious about what he’s doing. He means it. And that is very scary and disturbing. Now, lest you think this is a film all about Freddy – and you’re right it is. Every scene is about Freddy – how characters try to discover him, deal with him, interact with him in a dream state, childhood state, real world state…. Well, it gives the character a weight and a state of awesome that is wholly new. Imagine if after Boris Karloff… had Universal cast Raymond Massey as the Monster and actually adapted Mary Shelley’s FRANKENSTEIN. That’s kinda what has happened here. Or if today – they cast Jeremy Irons as the Monster… did an ever more “realistic” approach to the makeup – while keeping in line with the overall design. I love love love the look of Freddy, the new soul of Freddy and dammit… I’m excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER and that was not what I thought I was fucking getting on board tonight. At one point in the post film Q&A I dared to dream that if this film succeeded wildly enough… that having Jackie as Freddy – in the big version of Freddy character. The nightmare master Freddy – the one that gets surreal with the nightmares and to have those nightmares given all the talent, budget and WOWness that the world of visual effects could give them. Basically – to dream of Freddy – not being done in the Horror Basement – but the Penthouse. Can you imagine the big Krueger movie. DreamWarriors – in the hands of a Frank Darabont, with Jackie in the character and a sky is the limit visual palette? Well, this film is the perfect INTRODUCTION to a whole new world for Mr Fred Krueger. I’d love to see this film shock the box office world. To me, I love Freddy Krueger the way I love BATMAN, IRON MAN, SUPERMAN, SPIDER-MAN… He’s one of the single most disturbingly delicious characters that has been invented on screen and if there’s a HERO in the HORROR world… the guy that could and should bounce horror out of the budgetary ghetto – I’d love for it to be Freddy. This is a character that could be done A-List. Jackie is the exact right actor for the role – and I’d kill to see Jackie do not only this character for the rest of his life, but also a Bogart style side career. The man has anvils of charisma. I’d relish seeing him grow his career. He absolutely deserves it. He’s been doing tremendous work for a very long time and this is a STARRING vehicle for him. Sure, he ain’t a pretty face in this. Freddy is one of the most intensely disturbing figures I’ve seen on screen in quite some time. Now – how about the rest of the cast? They are, everyone, better than expected. With the standout being Clancy Brown, no he isn’t the John Saxon character. Nancy doesn’t seem to have a Dad in this film. In fact all the kids seem to be the progeny of single parent households. That is closer to modern reality than most would like to admit and dramatically – it means these kids often times are home alone a lot, even when their lying murderous parents are around, they’re not much help – and they’re not real significant. These are parents that at some point hunted down and killed a man for what 5 year olds told them. Is there really any doubt why all the parents should be single? I imagine the guilt of that kind of thing really could breakdown most any marriage. You just wouldn’t want the reminder. And I like that all the affected kids aren’t all in one location – though most of our main characters are. Rooney Mara and the rest of “high school teenagers” keep the mid-twenties set typically older than the real High School kids tradition alive in the Freddy universe. She’s also attractive, but that isn’t the first thing you think with her. She’s been working on demons for a while. Long before the nightmares there was something else with her. Something that made her not quite fit in. To bury herself in art and something that she could never fully articulate. In fact, that’s kind of the case with a lot of these kids. Everyone is damaged. Everyone in the film was tainted by Krueger before he became a nightmare. That isn’t overtly said – but you can tell – none of these characters are quite right. There is something wrong going on. But isn’t that how it should be in a community that handled their anger, vengeance and perverted sense of justice so horribly. One girl’s reaction to the last kill of the movie – during the Q&A was modified by a “Fucking Yeah!” There is vengeance to this film. Freddy was a very bad man – did horrible things perhaps, but does anyone deserve to be burnt alive trapped in a building that you’re keeping him from escaping? That’s how my mom went. Burned to death in a fire. Once you see that – there is a crazy fucked up righteous indignation that fuels Freddy in a way I’d never really seen him before. This wasn’t the crazy comic book bastard son of a hundred criminally insane maniacs and a nun… This was… the gardener… at a Pre-School. The reverse of Henry Jones and Patty McCormack’s positions in THE BAD SEED, but very much visually referenced and possibly inspired. The added mystery of the kids having to figure out what is killing them, why it is happening, who it was and what exactly did their parents do. At no level are these kids in a good place. They learn of repressed memories, lying murderously deceitful and emotionally ineffective parents – and they have a fucking dream god of mischief wishing to torment them beyond the pains of mortal death. This is… a really bad situation to be in. And that is as it should be in any good Nightmare on Elm Street, right? This isn’t the Freddy Krueger I grew up with. This one is more disturbed, more fiercely intense and yeah, he’s got more of that same sense of humor, but with real murder in the eyes. If you look for that – Jackie is giving it to ya. And that’s awesome in my book. If you want more spoilers – read around, I’m not really giving much away – just telling you – there’s a damn good NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET movie. Hopefully you’ll agree. And Will Smith! Isn’t it time for a remix awesome as fuck NIGHTMARE ON MY STREET video with you and Jackie Earle Haley? Well, I can dream. But then maybe that's your nightmare...

Readers Talkback

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  • April 29, 2010, 5:53 a.m. CST

    Wow, I know Harry can get worked up sometimes

    by NomoredirtyjokespleaseweareYanks

    Please be possible! Please do not fuck up Freddy. If it's genuinely scary, then I am so fuckin there!

  • April 29, 2010, 5:53 a.m. CST

    Good

    by Volfan8404

    I'll go just to see Jackie's interpretation of Freddie.

  • April 29, 2010, 5:54 a.m. CST

    Also, just finished Avatar on Blu-Ray

    by NomoredirtyjokespleaseweareYanks

    Holy Snappin Minotaur Testicles!!!!!

  • April 29, 2010, 5:54 a.m. CST

    Freddy

    by Volfan8404

    I'm a Jackass.

  • April 29, 2010, 5:54 a.m. CST

    What do you call a blonde who has gained weight????

    by NomoredirtyjokespleaseweareYanks

    Fat.

  • April 29, 2010, 5:55 a.m. CST

    Come on Harry

    by Drsambeckett1984

    I just don't buy any of that, this is a horror remake, and you're talking like its the second coming. Remakes are bad!!!!!!!

  • April 29, 2010, 5:56 a.m. CST

    Volfan8404. I'd love to see Jackies take on Freddie Highmore

    by NomoredirtyjokespleaseweareYanks

    I would pay $50 for it.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:03 a.m. CST

    Finally! A Review!

    by SAPProductions

    Appreciate the talks with the cast and crew and all the behind the scenes stuff, but considering up to yesterday there was no ACTUAL review of the movie, I was getting afraid that this was a "No press screenings" type of film. Hopefully for this film, other people are on the same wavelength as Harry.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:03 a.m. CST

    I didn't think the box office mattered to you Harry ?

    by barnaby jones

    Suddenly you get to host a free screening and you're worried about the green.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:04 a.m. CST

    my interpretation of this "review"

    by thatfilmlover

    Harry, like a lot of us, loves Jackie Earl Hayley as an actor. I'm sure he is fantastic as Freddy. What I'm not sure about is the quality of this movie, but I'm sure Harry wants it to succeed so Jackie get's to make ANOTHER movie as Freddy with an actual talented director behind the camera (hint: Frank Darabont) and a decent budget, he's said as much in his review. I can't give me real opinion until i see the movie, but if Mori/Drew says its bad, I'm going to trust him over Harry any day of the week. Jackie's performance has generated enough good will from Harry that he wants the movie to succeed to get a sequel, but that is far from an endorsement of the movie itself.... is my take and my opinion, until next time...

  • April 29, 2010, 6:05 a.m. CST

    Drsambeckett1984

    by HEADGEEK

    TARZAN (1931) WIZARD OF OZ (1939) THE MALTESE FALCON, MAGNIFICENT SEVEN, BEN HUR, 10 COMMANDMENTS, FRANKENSTEIN (31), John Carpenter's THE THING, 70's INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS, Cronenberg's FLY... There've been many great remakes. This is a really really good one that felt great cuz I was expecting possible major suckage. But the film received very loud applause and very positive and curious questions by an audience that paid such close attention, that one question was about Jackie Earle Haley's fingernails right before he was burnt. - and folks. Wait till you hear and see Jackie's trademark moves (all his own) that he introduces with the glove. it is killer.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:07 a.m. CST

    filmlover

    by HEADGEEK

    I'm not going to say it was better than the original - because the original owns me personally at a point in my life that was metaphysically perfect to see the first Freddy flick. <BR><BR>that said - it is pretty much superior in all ways save for the wall paper moment.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:08 a.m. CST

    Yeah, Freddy's motives

    by GhostDad

    Were pretty clear in the first NOES. He was after the kids of the folks that burned him. There was never any question about that. The scene where Heather's mother talks about Freddy and says "Mommy killed him" in the original was GREAT. So why does there now need to be a question about whether or not he did it? How does the fact that Freddy may or may not be a Child Molestor (rather than someone who outright, undoubtedly killed kids) make the character more scary? It's the same as Michael Myers being an abused kid from a redneck family, it makes the character less of an outright monster, and makes them less scary.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:09 a.m. CST

    Now all we need...

    by Clash_at_Demonhead

    ...is FREDDY vs JASON vs ASH.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:09 a.m. CST

    barnaby

    by HEADGEEK

    no. I genuinely want to see more NIGHTMARES with Jackie - and I'll be pissed off if the wretched shit that is FURRY VENGEANCE beats this - just on purely biased grounds of wanting stupid retarded bullshit movies to fail - while the smart genre reinvention succeeds. That's my motivation. Cuz it means less movies like FURRY VENGEANCE and more EVEN better adventures with Jackie Earle!

  • April 29, 2010, 6:10 a.m. CST

    It's JOHN Saxon, Harry.

    by BikerScout

    Saw him talk at a UK event in March. Awesome guy.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:10 a.m. CST

    Harrys reviews

    by mastes360

    Anyone else getting to the point where you realy can't be arsed reading his reviews as you know they will already be 100% positive?, don't get me wrong as i think the film looks decent but all the early reviews said the film is average at best.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:11 a.m. CST

    GhostDad

    by HEADGEEK

    Well - frankly. I don't think after you see the movie you'll ask any of those questions, as the answers are in the film and plainly obvious.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:12 a.m. CST

    Harry

    by Drsambeckett1984

    I'll allow every single one of those films you mentioned becuase they're awesome, The Fly for me is easily the greatest horror flick ever made. <P> Maybe my point was this, during the past 10 years, when remakes have been plentiful, how many good ones have there really been???

  • April 29, 2010, 6:13 a.m. CST

    also: Modern Great Remakes:

    by thatfilmlover

    can we PLEASE move on from the "all remakes are bad" argument, it's really dull. Here are some DECENT to GREAT modern remakes: The Ring (U.S), The Hills Have Eyes, The Amityville Horror, Dawn of the Dead, MY BLOODY VALENTINE (in 3D) QUARANTINE, LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT.... I also enjoyed alot of the Chainsaw remake, but I'm not going to stand behind it like the others on this list, shit, i also enjoyed The Friday remake, even if it failed to add anything into the mix, the kills were some of the best in the series. The biggest revelation here, is Harry coming out and saying that this Remake is better than the original, reading between the lines... now he's REALLY got me intrigued.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:15 a.m. CST

    And even more remakes of already good films

    by barnaby jones

    I see Commando is on the way. The fact is, the box office matters to you just like it does the rest of us, it means if amovie does well that we like there a good chance we'll see it become a fanchise. Does this mean we'll see no more berating of us squabling over B.O figures in the future Harry ?

  • April 29, 2010, 6:16 a.m. CST

    I'm still gonna see it

    by GhostDad

    Don't get me wrong. I'll see it because I'm a sucker and have seen every NOES since Part 2 in the theaters. I hope it's as good as you say it is, and I'm rooting for JEH, an actor I really like, to pull off Freddy. I just don't get why there has to be a "did he really molest kids?" angle, when really, nothing was wrong with him being an outright evil, unrepentant child killer.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:20 a.m. CST

    there is no "did he really molest kids" angle...

    by thatfilmlover

    by the end of the movie, this question is answered.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:21 a.m. CST

    thatfilmlover

    by Drsambeckett1984

    Sorry, but none of those you mentioned hold a torch to the original, most didnt need to be remade, and Amytiville?? Seriously, it was fucking awful.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:30 a.m. CST

    Drsambeckett1984

    by thatfilmlover

    id love for you to sit there and explain to me how The Hills Have Eyes (original) is superior to the Remake, the same goes for LAST HOUSE. As for AMITYVILLE Horror, the original is barely a movie, you wait an hour for a 15 minute sequence at the end.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:37 a.m. CST

    thatfilmlover

    by Drsambeckett1984

    I'd say Last House, both original and remake are equally unpleasant. <P> I'll concede Hills Have Eyes though. The remake is pretty good.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:49 a.m. CST

    them remakes

    by Strontium Dog

    Harry, the remakes you listed (albeit good movies)all benefitted from advances in technology, political rhetoric and attitudes. These key points justified the remakes. The remakes we've been supplied with lately add nothing new to the original points...er..originally made. All I smell are FRANCHISE REBOOTS. And since when did a Macdonalds franchise win out over a 5 star resturant?

  • April 29, 2010, 6:49 a.m. CST

    Drew was right about "Robin Hood"

    by Shawn F.

    It was shit. I saw a screening last week in the Boston area. 148 minutes of a plot cobbled together by a committee that wasted a decent cast and director. Even the action scenes felt like outtakes from Gladiator.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:51 a.m. CST

    "I’m excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER"

    by Righteous Brother

    that quote is a keeper.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:55 a.m. CST

    I'm glad it's good and all, Harry....

    by Holeman

    But, you're dead wrong about something. Burning a child molester alive is something they all fucking deserve. They deserve worse than that actually. In this case, I probably would have gone with a nice bullet in the head and called it a day. I've never heard of anyone coming back to kill kids because of that. I still think they should have left the whole "Is he a kiddie rapist or isn't he?" thing completely ambiguous. If the parents had somehow gotten the wrong dude, THAT IS A FUCKING MOTIVE FOR A HORROR MOVIE VILLAIN! The thing about Freddy I never bought was that he was always evil as fucking hell and he didn't deserve his revenge. If he had been innocent of the crime they said he did, then yeah. Otherwise? No. Hey, do the flying turd demons make an appearance during the barbecue scene?

  • April 29, 2010, 7:04 a.m. CST

    Sorry, Harry. I enjoy reading your reviews....

    by Gabba-UK

    But when it comes to the actual opinion on the quality of the film, Drew beats you. If he's saying it's not good, I trust him. And that's a shame because with a couple of notable exceptions I loath the horror genre entirely. The original Elm Street is one of those rare exceptions and I was looking forward to it. But it seems that it's going to put on the ever increasing pile of lacklustre, failed remakes. Shame.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:12 a.m. CST

    I'm happy for all of the people who...

    by dante76

    ...are looking forward to this movie, God bless you, but there's no way in hell I'm ever going to watch this willingly. I'd like to reimagine Michael Bay all over his head though...

  • April 29, 2010, 7:15 a.m. CST

    Holeman

    by HEADGEEK

    I'm one of those antiquated, "Thou shalt not kill" types. I took it relatively serious and without exception. That's why I love movies with fake death and murder and mayhem. Loophole of morality.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:22 a.m. CST

    Again no mention of those little things...

    by kwisatzhaderach

    like direction, editing, scoring, cinematography...

  • April 29, 2010, 7:23 a.m. CST

    Abrams/Spielberg team-up

    by kwisatzhaderach

    http://www.thewrap.com/ind-column/spielberg-abrams-teaming-top-secret-movie-16782

  • April 29, 2010, 7:25 a.m. CST

    @Holeman - If Freddy was innocent, then

    by V'Shael

    you run the risk of "humanising" the monster, which is normally doesn't happen until at least one sequel has gone by and the author/writer has fallen in love with his own creation.<br /><br />It happened to Hannibal Lector too, remember? <br /><br />Let the monsters be monsters.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:30 a.m. CST

    PLANT!!

    by LargoJr

    Harry is a pseudonym for "Has A Really Round Yazputza".. I read it on a gum wrapper so you KNOW its true

  • April 29, 2010, 7:32 a.m. CST

    HARRY'S CHECK FROM PLATINUM DUNES MUST HAVE JUST CLEARED!!!

    by TehCreepyThinMan

    Sorry Knowles but I’m not buying your brand of shit on this one. The Nightmare on Elm Street series was my favorite horror franchise growing up and I was fixated on those movies because unlike, say, the Friday the 13th series (which I do love, for the most part, and I FUCKING HATED the fucking remake), the NOES flicks always showed more imagination. The first NOES is a classic. PERIOD. Freddy Krueger became an ISTANT icon but soon after he turned into a pun spouting clown and remained that way even up until Freddy Vs. Jason, which I thought was complete and utter fucking shit. This is why I wasn’t too upset that Englund wouldn’t be coming back and Haley kicked ass in Watchmen. So I was willing to give it a chance.<br> <br>But then I realized that it was yet another remake by that fucking hack Bay’s production company so there was zero chance that this would be anything but a glossy piece of shit made by some music video/commercial directing wanker looking to make his bones in features, starring a plethora of vapid looking yuppie larva. If PD had done something inspired like, say, hire David Lynch, Lars Von Trier, Gaspar Noe or even Chris Cunningham who (despite being a music video/commercial director) has displayed a talent for disturbing imagery, THEN we might have been able to expect something unique at the very least.<br> <br>But unique and interesting are not words in Michael Bay’s vernacular just like “quality” and , “intelligent”. Some people have been bitching about the fact that NOES was remade at all but I think the concept is strong enough that a really good re-examination of its ideas and themes could have made for some quality Horror just as Phillip Kaufman did with Invasion of the Body Snatchers or John Carpenter did with The Thing or David Cronenberg did with The Fly. All three of which are considered the Holy Trinity of classic Horror remakes and Horror/Sci-fi ones at that. But the NOES remake never had a chance because it was not supported by true filmmakers but a group of vultures circling around to pick at Freddy Krueger’s carcass.<br> <br>Suffice to say, I will not be seeing this.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:37 a.m. CST

    All the stuff you mentioned is valid in the original

    by jamazio

    The stuff about people not being happy and something fucked up is going wrong and about single parents (Craven even expressed this in the DVD documentary) all is expressed in the Cravens original. Nancy's parents are divorced, Tina's mom seems to be as she's fucking some random guy when Tina wakes up at the beginning, Rod is an outcast who has no mention of family, I guess Glen is the only one whose folks are still together. But I am glad they kept this theme in the remake, its the heart and soul of what makes it work. I always thought it would work even better if the houses didn't seem so perfect and immaculate and belonged to wealthy people. Elm street at its best is always about the lack of communication between parents/adults and there kids. Its kinda deep. Kids have bad dreams all the time and its the parents duty to reassure them to ignore them and not be afraid to sleep. But of course in this its a reality. Thats a common cliche for most horrors but Elm Street always took that a step further and even explored it. It won't better the original cuz I consider it one of the most intelligent slasher flicks of all time, and the direction, cinematography, execution, editing, THE SCORE, the revelations, pacing and just about everything are above and beyond perfect its easy for people to overlook just how damned GOOD Craven's original is, but I consider this worth watching because most of the sequels were awful and this one along with 3 and 7 seem to be most faithful to the classic original. It was terrible how Freddy became a star of the show and a comic book character with one liners. Good to have him back, dark and brooding and scary just as he should be.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:37 a.m. CST

    creepythin

    by HEADGEEK

    I hear ya. But honestly - you need to see the film. Haley's performance is riveting in combination with the make up - and the kids are all better than I expected given their prior histories. This is the very best of the Platinum Dunes guys and in particular the first film that they've done that I felt was significantly smart in how they handled a very real adaptation that showed some thought to it. I was as shocked as anyone. And dude. I sure could use some of these mythical checks. There's a CAPTAIN AMERICA COMICS #2 that I really want. giggle

  • April 29, 2010, 7:39 a.m. CST

    creepythin man

    by JaviT

    so you don't want to see the Transformers vs Freddy flick?

  • April 29, 2010, 7:41 a.m. CST

    I mainly watch movies

    by oborostyle

    because of the cinematography, the big emotions from a closeup of a beautiful lighted face and the art of combining music/sound and moving images to new highs. maybe i am in the minority but harrys film reviews are a complete waste for me and what i want to know about a movie.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:43 a.m. CST

    looking forward to seeing this on the weekend

    by Bathman

    I enjoy reading harry's reviews but you can never take them seriously. i bet if he didn't host a special screening with JEH, harry would have ripped this movie a apart<P>I love this site harry, but the fact is that you've gotten to big (no thats not a weight joke) you've gone from small website operator to mainstream geek critic and the studios know this. Studios and directors pamper you up with special screenings or exclusive scoops and you return the favor with a "great" review. I don't know if you are doing it intentionally but it is being done<P>I intend on seeing this anyways, but harry your review reaks of a spoiled boy who's absentee father shows up everyonce and a while with a big present to win his love

  • April 29, 2010, 7:47 a.m. CST

    in defence of Harry.

    by thatfilmlover

    I love how Harry remains one of the industries biggest optimists. I empathize with Harry a lot when it comes to movies, because he seems to love them so much, and it really takes something for him to hate a film, i totally get that, i love a lot of really bad movies, just because they have that one thing i can latch onto and really get behind. To me, it feels like Harry is the same, and I'm cool with that. A movie has to be really, really bad for Harry not to like it, and that's ok. When it comes to how a movie is going to be perceived by the audience at large, i trust Drew more than Harry. When it comes to how I, personally will feel about a film, as somebody that really is easy to please and is just looking for something fun, more often than not, Harry get's it right.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:47 a.m. CST

    A spoiler box on this heap of shit?

    by lead_sharp

    but not the IM2 'review'

  • April 29, 2010, 7:49 a.m. CST

    Ironic...

    by realpayton34

    Iron Man 2 gets a special AICN screening, and all the reviews are overflowing with praise while everybody else says it's (at best) a mild improvement or (at worst) pales in comparison to the first. Now, Nightmare gets a special AICN screening, and every review posted is gushing over it, while every other review I've seen online says it's a turd. Curious...

  • April 29, 2010, 7:50 a.m. CST

    "I’m excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER"

    by alice133

    no amount of bleach will ever remove that from my brain.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:53 a.m. CST

    Harry...

    by JBouganim1

    Out of all the sequel NOES films, with the exception of the first one, which one did you prefer?

  • April 29, 2010, 7:54 a.m. CST

    IMAGINE A LARS VON TRIER NOES STARRING WILLIAM DAFOE AS KRUEGER!

    by TehCreepyThinMan

    Hey, I just remembered that me and Trier share the same birthday, April 30th. He was born in 56 and I in 78. Cool.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:57 a.m. CST

    Harry had no issues with fucking a baby in Serbia...

    by vezner2007

    It's hard to take him seriously in this review.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:59 a.m. CST

    Seriously, Though, What are The Chances...

    by Aquatarkusman

    ... that this is actually good? The best remake will be Willie the Groundskeeper getting burned up because Kirk van Houten didn't like the idea of Milhouse getting two spaghetti meals in one day.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:02 a.m. CST

    I got excited by this review

    by provider84

    I mean Nightmare is one of my favourite horror films so was excited by this review i WANT this remake to be good...then I read the user comments and i knew there was something wasnt right with this article... To see if this cynicism was justified I searched online for other movie reviews. Everything im reading is saying the movie is hollow, unimaginative, and pretty pointless. and Jackie Earle Haley doesnt do enough to make the role his own. hmmm?? Guess i'll judge for myself when it comes out in the UK next week.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:03 a.m. CST

    HEADGEEK, I HAVE NO DOUBT HALEY WILL OWN......

    by TehCreepyThinMan

    No fucking doubt. But my worry is that he'll be the cherry on top of this steaming turd and it's only redeeming quality. Just like how Derek Mears' Jason was the only good thing about the F13th redux. These thing's just look waaaaaaay too fucking glossy for my taste and even though the F13th/NOES flicks were NEVER great art, they had a charm to them that is lacking from these remakes. IMHO The Hills Have Eyes was the only good remake of this past decade. Not great but good.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:12 a.m. CST

    OH AND THE MAKE-UP LOOKS FUCKING SHIT TOO!!!

    by TehCreepyThinMan

    Sorry but he looks like a burn ward gimp. As I said, no imagination.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:15 a.m. CST

    Also, Do the kids in this movie use narcotics to stay awake?

    by provider84

    Cos downing some Speed bombs seems alot more realistic way to stay awake than drinking mugs of coffee...

  • April 29, 2010, 8:18 a.m. CST

    "effin awesome and creepy as all fuck"

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Ah, the old college degree at work.<p> I hope HK's right about this--I'm interested. But then again, I was interested in the F13 redux and didn't find it nearly as fun or as interesting as the original movies (the first four,anyway).

  • April 29, 2010, 8:21 a.m. CST

    oh im not worried

    by RefutetheHype

    the number of posts on this suggests just how much interest there is. this is going to be the last big remake from pd for a while i think. thank you noes remake for making PD stop.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:28 a.m. CST

    Did we see the same movie?

    by triefy

    Um.....really? I don't mind the buttering up to a studio aspect of most of your reviews Harry, but I honestly think that your involvement in some of the schmoozing by the studios is hindering your reviews. I know I'm not the first one to say something like this and I definitely won't be the last. I will be posting a review on my site and another movie site on Friday but let me just say that this film is bland as all get out. I figured the worst thing that would happen would be sitting through a typical remake that will always try to recreate some of the iconic scenes sourced from the original, but ultimately fail. However, I thought that Haley's performance would be good if not creepy. Sadly, even Haley cannot save the emotionless script nor do I think he did a good performance as the dream demon. The flashback scenes flesh out his creepiness more, but it is nothing unique. Haley's Krueger manages to deliver some pervertly humorous one-liners that adds a little dimension to this recarnation, but other than that, I think Haley is a waste in this one. If you are wanting to see this film, catch this one at home fiends.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:29 a.m. CST

    Hayley good. Horror remakes bad.

    by Sithtastic

    Much like Harry, I would pay my $10.00 to see Jack Ehrle Hayley read out of the New York phone book, but I'm sorry, for whatever reason, he's had a bad string of luck thus far. While he was arguably one of the best parts of the Watchmen, that film had so much baggage that it seemed to overpower what was otherwise a flawless performance. Here Hayley's playing another iconic character, but all bets are off as he will repeatedly be compared to the prior portrayal of Freddy and hence the original film to the updated version. As has been the case with all the horror remakes, I have yet to see one measure up to the original, no matter the added starpower. Its obviously not the actors' fault no doubt, just the studios trapping us in this overwrought, inevitable comparison game.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:29 a.m. CST

    fuck this fucking summer!!!!!!!

    by sam jacksons wig

    There is virtually FUCK ALL that is coming out this summer that has the potential to be truly amazing! The A Team will be shite (Harry will love it), Robin Hood will be a gladiator by the numbers steamy turd (Harry will love it), Jonah Hex has been destroyed at tests (Harry will love it).... the only thing to possibly get worked up over is Inception. This year has fuck all in comparison to last year!!!!

  • April 29, 2010, 8:29 a.m. CST

    anvils of charisma

    by hoisin

    dear lord

  • April 29, 2010, 8:32 a.m. CST

    Wow!

    by Philvis

    Saw that coming from a mile away. As soon as I saw all the interviews on here, I knew there was no way he would give a bad review. I figured he wouldn't review it at all or say it was awesome. Harry can like what he wants, but its gotten to the point on here where you don't know if its an honest review or if they are blowing smoke up your ass because they've scored set visits, interviews, etc. I bet Bay wishes he would have given you some more one on one time last year prior to TF2.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:33 a.m. CST

    Will it be soooo shit.....

    by sam jacksons wig

    ...... that the audience falls asleep and are mauled by a horrifically burnt Michael Bay????

  • April 29, 2010, 8:36 a.m. CST

    I've been reading this site a while now . . .

    by adiehardfanwithalethalweapon

    . . . and I've read one review of yours after another. I just don't think you have your fingers on the pulse of geekdum anymore. One review after another and it's nearly always positive. If the movie was shit or not. I think you've been caught up in the big machine. Flights to sets, visits with celebs, and on and on. I think these things often sway your opinion so wildly that it's nostalgia that writes these reviews and not intellect.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:39 a.m. CST

    Are you nuts?

    by Victor_Kros

    What the hell movie did you see? Clearly you didn't see the movie I did at Mans Chinese Theater last night. You know people accuse you a lot of selling out Harry but this time you really have gone over to the dark side. This film was terrible, absolutely terrible. Haley is great no doubt about it but he has nothing to work with here. No dream powers, no motivation, no intention to slay the people who freakin burned him. None of this motivation makes any sense - he doesn't even kill anyone until he's bored toying with them. He gains his power from repressed memories yet he kills everyone before they can remember what they did to piss him off. Clancy Brown? Really? Let's talk about how stupid are in this flick. Let's talk about how their only purpose in this remake is to act as MacGuffins for Nancy who is too stupid to figure things out for herself. Let's discuss her mother with a secret and nothing more to add to this story. Let's discuss Harry how Nancy Thompson actually evolved into someone stronger than she began where as Nancy Hilbrook is the same angst ridden goth chick she starts out as. What does she have to live for? Why do we care? Rooney's performance can't hold a candle to Heather Langenkamp, especially in New Nightmare. Someone needs to tell the truth and truth is this remake falls way, way, below the contextual story of the original film directed and written by Wes Craven. Wes did his homework. I would wager to guess that the original writers of the script for this film, Wesley Strick and Eric Heisserer are horrified by the changes made to their original draft made back in January 2009. Nancy "Hilbrook" is just plain stupid in this film. She has no value and gives us nothing to care about. She beats Freddy on a fluke and not on her own. She hides in a friggin closet in a dream, while knowing she is dreaming thinking she can get away from Freddy in his own damn world. Really the best part about this flick was the design of the glove, cinematography, and the music. It sure as hell wasn't the story which was as creatively bankrupt as Michael Bay's ability to "write" a coherent story in Transformers franchise. The rest is an inferior knock off parody of the original film which is by no means perfect but a hell of a lot more intelligent and scary. Stop sucking up to the studios, this time your BS won't fly. You claim to be a Freddy fan yet you easily betray what makes him who he is. Yes, Jackie's Freddy is different but in no way is he superior to the original portrayal by Robert Englund. There is only one Freddy and he hung up the glove. I'm willing to accept Jackie can do better with enough time to expand his character but without Wes Craven's involvement, this franchise is going to end as quickly as it began. The most insulting aspect of this poor "theatrical release" is that there are obvious scenes missing that will no doubt end up on the "extended directors cut" unrated dvd. That my friends is the studio brass spitting your beloved franchise and your intelligence right back in your face - laughing their way to the bank while you waste money on an intentionally inferior cut of the film you crave to see most. Take a stand, call a spade a spade and let Warner Bros and Platinum Dunes know you deserve and demand better should there ever be a sequel. I am not studio brass or an executive, I am a fan and fans matter. We give the property its value and its time suits recognized that a fandom can make or break a franchise no matter who owns it. Wes Craven created characters we could believe in and we could cheer for. What Platinum Dunes and Michael Bay have accomplished is another way to cash in on a franchise they clearly don't understand but are quick to criticize. Before you make statements on how you can do something better, maybe you should do your research into not trying to fix what isn’t broke.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:41 a.m. CST

    by Victor_Kros

    Let's talk about how stupid PARENTS are in this flick

  • April 29, 2010, 8:41 a.m. CST

    Here's what to believe.....

    by sam jacksons wig

    Go to the cinema and watch the movie. Then have your own opinion on what you think of it. I stopped believing the shit that Harry spouts and drinking his Kool Aid quite some time ago. I am convinced that if he had received enough kick backs he would have put a positive spin on The Backup Plan. Seriously....

  • April 29, 2010, 8:42 a.m. CST

    I'll give it a shot.

    by HorrorFan81

    But I'm not holding out much hope. The AICN crew has given way too many positive reviews to shitty horror films.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:43 a.m. CST

    Wow--who to believe???

    by dead youngling

    Got pumped by Harry's review, but now...

  • April 29, 2010, 8:46 a.m. CST

    Oh wait.........

    by sam jacksons wig

    Did Harry watch this on his free I Pad???

  • April 29, 2010, 8:47 a.m. CST

    Clancy Brown

    by DrHugoZHackenbush

    I've been watching "Carnivale," and I gotta say, I have a newfound respect for Clancy Brown, or, as I used to know him, the evil guard from "The Shawshank Redemption." He's Mr. Krabs!

  • April 29, 2010, 8:51 a.m. CST

    Actually, Freddy DOES stand trial...

    by TheFilmYap

    In some sense. Nancy's mom in the first film said that he was arrested but walked. That's why the parents got together and killed him in the first place. There's actually an episode of the 80s show "Freddy's Nightmares" where they show how Freddy got off on a technicality, then was killed.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:55 a.m. CST

    Why does Harry hope for sequels?

    by BobParr

    So it can devolve once again into a horror/comedy where Freddy makes bad puns after killing someone.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:58 a.m. CST

    Grammar

    by Come_ON

    "Now, lest you think this is a film all about Freddy – and you’re right it is." Seriously FUCKING GO BACK TO GRADE SCHOOL.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:59 a.m. CST

    would be stronger had Freddy NOT been a molester

    by alienindisguise

    then his rage would be justified and would make for a much deeper character. Guess I'm the only one not willing to applaud a character who's a pedophile.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:01 a.m. CST

    Platinum Dunes Peaked w/ TCM

    by Mr. Profit

    As much shit as the TCM remake gets, I don't see why TCM3 and 4 don't get trashed. 3 was already a glossy remake. And 4 turned Leatherface into a tranny who cried over a walkman. <P>But the remake (while lacking the grit of the original) was a well paced barebones slasher that offered up no explanations as to why shit happened. It just did. And Jessica Biel was a perfect "Final Girl". Had the movie tried to copy the tone and look of the original, it would have failed. So viewing the remake as part 5 works well to appreciate it better. <P>All that being said, I feel the rest of their output following was weak. Amityville was (like Harry said) saved by Reynolds. TCM The Beginning only served as a way to connect the dots in the remake and it was pointless. The Unborn was a melting pot of horror cliches saved by how nice it is to look at Odette Yustman. The Hitcher was boring. And finally F13 was relatively tame compared to the original films. It was Jason's Greatest Hits: The Kidz Bop Version. It was as if they got every cool murder from the original and made it tame. And no one needs to ever die in those films with a screwdriver. Oh yeah, and the score sucked. <P>I am hoping Harry's review of this film is legit. I read the script and it made me lose all interest in seeing this. But the news of reshoots and the trailers have made me interested again. I just hope I am not disappointed by another pointless, tame, average movie. Harry, I hope you are not making me spend $14.50 to be upset.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:02 a.m. CST

    Also Harry, how was the score?

    by Mr. Profit

    Was it as bad as the score from F13 or was it actually good this time? Also are any of the original themes used at all?

  • April 29, 2010, 9:04 a.m. CST

    Sell-Out!

    by BigTuna

    Every film that gives you anything you love Harry.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:09 a.m. CST

    RE: Score

    by Victor_Kros

    The music was memorable. It fit the scenes well and it had a very Nightmare feel without having to be the original score. There is even a small nod to the original piano notes in the opening titles that every Nightmare fan will pick up on. Sadly however, there are no other nods to the original scores from any Nightmare film after this. Steve Jablonsky clearly wants to make the scoring duties for this “new nightmare” his own. I think he succeeds in making a cinematic score that does a fantastic job of being sympathetic and eerie at the same time. I rather enjoyed the music and will add it to my collection.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:14 a.m. CST

    Probably alone here.

    by lotharius3rd1118

    But I don't really have a problem with the Platinum Dune remakes. I thought the TCM remake was pretty scary, and damned entertaining. Not as creepy as the original, but still a winner in its own right. <p> The Amityville Horror sucked complete ass, but it wasn't eactly traipsing on hallowed ground there. The original was a decent, low-budget affair that had lost its relevance soon after it was released. <p> The Friday the 13th redo was passable, not great. But once again, it was a series that had committed seppeku. Anytime your horror icon goes to space, it should be the end of the series until some enterprising fucknut can redo it. <p> Not sure if they did Last House on the Left, but that was the only one that I can say was a vast improvement on its source material. Though the original does have a few great shocker moments, its terrible production values and comic relief police officeers ruin the proceedings. The remake got it right. A teriffic flick.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:14 a.m. CST

    TheFilmYap, I REMEMBER THAT EPISODE OF FREDDY'S NIGHTMARES......

    by TehCreepyThinMan

    It was actually Directed by TOBE HOOPER, yes, the very same and starred two blonde twin girls who also banged Andrew Dice Clay in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:16 a.m. CST

    Where's the Harry Brown review?

    by nostairway

    That's what we're all really waiting for!

  • April 29, 2010, 9:17 a.m. CST

    Glad its good..

    by bobbyperusteeth

    ..Not every remake has to suck balls. I just hope they don't remake FREDDYS REVENGE. That film was fucking hilarious.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:19 a.m. CST

    Man in Suit! Man in Suit!

    by DarfurOnTheRocks2

    Too bad Harry has now become a man in suit

  • April 29, 2010, 9:27 a.m. CST

    Victor_Kros...is calling you out Harry.....

    by Righteous Brother

    you're not going to stand for that are you?

  • April 29, 2010, 9:33 a.m. CST

    lotharius3rd1118- Last House was produced by Craven

    by Mr. Profit

    And the idea to tone down some of the outrageous violence and focus on the rape was a good movie. The movie was miles better than the original. And it didn't need bumbling cops cutting into violence to give the audience a break. It was solid. Unsettling.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:38 a.m. CST

    Question Regarding the Parents & Burning Fred

    by Dave I

    I guess I do not get how you do not sympathize more with the parents. Child molesting is really such a despicable and taboo subject, maybe I'm just assuming but doesn't EVERYBODY more or less come out feeling pretty understanding when parents actually take action against somebody who molests their children?<p><p>In some ways, yeah, somebody who molests children and gets killed for it is going to be more likely to be seen as getting what they deserve. In another way, I am not condoning or championing burning child molesters alive, particularly if there's some grey area and no trial to prove innocence, so maybe they did and maybe they didn't. Still, historically speaking, the notion of NOT killing child abusers by harshly violent means is relatively new. While from a legal perspective I'd want to have every person get their chance to at least defend themselves. On the other hand, if an actual child molester ends up killed by parents of the children they molested, I am far from sympathizing or feeling bad with the possible caveat that it is an uncontrollable mental sickness. However, JEH's performance is key to making Fred tragic and human enough for there to be that edge of sympathy, and I DID feel compassion for him in Little Children so I think he can pull definitely it off. I am still feeling more justified toward the parents for protecting their kids though.<p><p>Also, as stated before . . . "I’m excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER." Rather unfortunate phrasing.<p><p>-Cheers

  • April 29, 2010, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Movies to look forward too in 2010

    by thatfilmlover

    Inception, Predators,The Expendables, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World,Let Me In (right one remake, could be good), Jackass 3-D, Harry Potter - Deathly Hallows 1... and... is there much else?

  • April 29, 2010, 9:43 a.m. CST

    The bedroom, coming through the wall scene

    by Cobb05

    It looks like a scene out of The Frightners. Couldn't they have spent a little more on that horrible CG? The scene in the original was great and it didn't cost thousands of dollars.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:46 a.m. CST

    mmm.... koolaid

    by deadfiller

    I don't know how any self-respecting fan of the franchise can walk out of that movie with a smile. A nightmare flick should be scary or funny (hopefully both). This one was neither, employing lame jump scares and cgi gore. Haley is a fine actor, but he isn't able to get past the makeup like Englund did.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:51 a.m. CST

    Joblo.com reviews Nightmare Remake

    by thatfilmlover

    http://www.joblo.com/index2.php guess what? it's bad. 3/10 KNOWLES!

  • April 29, 2010, 9:54 a.m. CST

    after the movie I told the hot-dog guy FREDDY'S BACK and I meant

    by shalom82

    Aftwerwards I went on my Facebook and I did exactly what Harry said to do, I did my own little review telling people to go see this movie. Fortunately all my friends know I suck cock by choice so nobody will believe me. 'cause I recommended Godzilla too.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:02 a.m. CST

    Knowles = opinion not to be trusted

    by Rocco Curioso

    He's like the special-needs father of an otherwise normal family. Yes, technically he's in charge... but that doesn't make him any less of a total dunce.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:12 a.m. CST

    The idea of Will Smith making a music vid

    by jamazio

    With Earl Haley being a 'good idea'. Not the best way of ending a review Harry. You almost had me up until that point.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:32 a.m. CST

    by Exasperilious

    "There’s actual new material being presented into the mythology that I really really love." No need to write actual there Harry, you're being redundant. Plus, isn't it actualLY? Take a writing class at a community college.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:34 a.m. CST

    No Harry, you are WRONG

    by D.Vader

    The best thing about the Friday the 13th remake was NOT the dock death. It was that awesome sex scene toward the end and that chick's STUPENDOUS rack. That made the movie for me more than any other scene, character, or death.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:35 a.m. CST

    I thought the dock death was a highlight.

    by lotharius3rd1118

    'Cause that chick in the water had an amazing rack.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:42 a.m. CST

    "Prequel" ep of Freddy's Nightmares

    by Beezbo

    Saw it recently and it was awful. Another bad Tobe Hooper effort.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:45 a.m. CST

    Harry you need to get out of that chair brother

    by TheJudger

    Seriously, you are going to get a DVT in your leg if you don't. If you get a DVT in one of those legs and you don't get it treated in time. It will break off and travel into your lungs and kill you. These clots only take a week or so after detectable symptoms to do that. Symptoms are so slight many people never even realize they have them till it's too fucking late. The lucky survivors get superficial clots that hurt so much that they seek medical help and the DVT is found, where as most folks just get the DVT and the symptoms are so slight they don't find help in time. <P> If you do get a DVT and the docs find it and they treat it with a clot busters and a lifetime daily warfin regimen. You will probably get PTS which really sucks. I meant to say this in the Iron Man 2 thread. Listen I know you got back problems man. See someone about it, stop sitting on your hands. John Ottman The composer for h20 had an artificial disc put into his lower back. Heed the warning dude. you've been on that chair for too long now and payment for that inactivity is certain if you don't change. I know I sound like an ass, but I know what I'm talking about. PTS sucks fucking devil dick, there is no cure. Over time they will eventually have to amputate that leg. You don't want it, and an Emboli traveling into the lungs feels like satan has that area griped into a tight knot and he's tearing it out. Get the hell out of that chair and dont sit or lay for extended periods of time. It will kill you. If it's the back get some help.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:52 a.m. CST

    How long has it been?

    by SmokingRobot

    Since anyone took one of Harry's reviews seriously?

  • April 29, 2010, 10:56 a.m. CST

    AICN...........RIP

    by Righteous Brother

    It was fun whilst it lasted.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:57 a.m. CST

    Freddy Nikes? I gotta see this!

    by Traumnovelle

    I'm a big sneaker freak and an even bigger movie freak. Post a picture of em, Harry!

  • April 29, 2010, 10:58 a.m. CST

    Harry will have the only position review of this movie

    by GodMars

    Anywhere.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:59 a.m. CST

    Actually, nevermind..

    by Traumnovelle

    ...just ran a Google search. Wow! I had no idea those even existed. They're almost as cool as the out-of-print 'Heaven's Gate' (the cult, not the movie) dunks they did a while back. <P> Great fucking pick-up Harry. I wear a size 12, I'll cop em off you....name your price!

  • April 29, 2010, 11:03 a.m. CST

    JESUS.

    by Traumnovelle

    Then, I checked Google for the PRICE of these Freddy Krueger dunks....$1,000 to $1,3000 on various sites. Yeeeeeeesh.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:04 a.m. CST

    That was $1,300.

    by Traumnovelle

    Not thirteen thousand. Still, a lot of money.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:08 a.m. CST

    Can't you ever have a spolier free review, Harry?!

    by Dr. Samuel Loomis

    Fuck man, I love reading your reviews but I can't read half of them until after I saw the film. Cut back a little buddy.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:09 a.m. CST

    Um yeah Harry..HOW ABOUT DE NIRO IN FRANKENSTIEN

    by EddieMurphysLaugh

    Guess you never saw that one eh buddy when you were trying to think of Jeremy Irons "more realistic" take on the monster.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:09 a.m. CST

    If Freddy was child molester...

    by Sam_Jay_Jick_Donutly_Dildoclip

    Why is he killing teenagers?

  • April 29, 2010, 11:16 a.m. CST

    if only his opinon meant something

    by FleshMachine

    a shame that there's absolutely no consistancy in his reviews...i mean the star wars prequels...indy4..how can you trust anything he says?

  • April 29, 2010, 11:18 a.m. CST

    Why my friends at Rotten Tomatoes are Dead Wrong about Freddy Kr

    by EddieMurphysLaugh

    0% rating at RT right now..lol. GO HARRY..lol.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:23 a.m. CST

    "We had the Platinum Dunes dudes coming in"

    by AllPowerfulWizardOfOz

    stop reading right there.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:26 a.m. CST

    ^^Good Point^^

    by jamazio

    Says it all really.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:34 a.m. CST

    I loved the film! I think it is the best remake since the thing!

    by Professor_Bedlam

  • April 29, 2010, 11:36 a.m. CST

    I disagree with this review

    by USUCK

    The director did an amazing job with the material, but the script was lacking. I also have a problem with how they don't really have a hero in this movie. Nancy is nothing more than a throw away character in this movie. There are no survival insticts as evidenced in the original. One scene with a needle to Freddy's eye is hardly a defense tactic. Also, the ending was poor. If the movie had a stronger ending, I think it would have made a huge difference. I did like the score alot and felt Steve J did a good job.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:37 a.m. CST

    Sam_Jay_Jick_Donutly_Dildoclip

    by FleshMachine

    to get revenge on their parents who killed him

  • April 29, 2010, 11:40 a.m. CST

    Professor_Bedlam = plant!

    by FleshMachine

    best remake in 30 years? you moron.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:55 a.m. CST

    00% positive on Rottentomatoes

    by JuanSanchez

  • April 29, 2010, 12:01 p.m. CST

    It can't be good, we all know that

    by jambone

    because Harry loves it.

  • April 29, 2010, 12:15 p.m. CST

    "Thou Shall not Kill Guys"

    by MegaBeth

    Whenever I hear that statement, I know the person saying it has never had his life, or the life of a loved one, in jeopardy. It's always different when it's YOUR ass on the line, or if it's YOUR child that was raped and murdered. Silly Hippies.

  • April 29, 2010, 12:25 p.m. CST

    0% on rt.com....yeah, a real winner! lol

    by SlimButNotreally

    I could see this coming, though. Harry loves crappy movies, so I now know to stay far away from this POS remake.

  • April 29, 2010, 12:26 p.m. CST

    Know why directors/actors like Harry?

    by SlimButNotreally

    because he gives them a free pass when they make shit. He'll be the only one praising this movie, so all those that made it will like him. If he didn't do this then this site wouldn't exist. It's for business reasons.

  • April 29, 2010, 12:28 p.m. CST

    But does it have "child molestation in a tasteful way"?

    by GhostofLesterBangs

    Anybody remember that early review that said that?

  • April 29, 2010, 12:34 p.m. CST

    0/7 on rottentomatoes

    by cinemixtape.com

    That awesome, huh Harry?

  • April 29, 2010, 12:38 p.m. CST

    Jesus Harry, can you have your writings make sense??

    by D.Vader

    I fucking hate having to reread the same setence and paragraph over and over again to try and decipher what the heck you are trying to say. Seriously man, don't rush through your writings so damn much. Your reviews are so fucking hard to understand sometimes.

  • April 29, 2010, 12:41 p.m. CST

    fuck off

    by Dkev00

    Joblo fucking hates this POS. The Tomatometer doesn't even register this POS. Which means? Harry has no taste in movies. But we all knew that.

  • April 29, 2010, 1:09 p.m. CST

    @Creepy Thin...

    by lovecraftian

    "Glossy"--You hit the nail on the head, brother. I was never going to be interested in this remake anyway. The glossy look of all these movies, however, is their most notable flaw. I'm not going to say I'm immune to remakes. I even own both FRIDAY's (original and remake) and MY BLOODY VALENTINE IN 3-D (imo, the absolute best thing to come out of the remake craze.-Tom Atkins is a god!) But what really irks me about the direction in these remakes (and almost any film in the current era of horror) is they've been only been doing three looks: gritty grunge, video from COPS, or washed out, sterile grey, as if there are no other palettes to choose from. You know what might scare me in a horror film? Someone actually shooting it as straight forwardly as possible. When I've gone back to some of Cronenberg's work (say, THE DEAD ZONE) or that matter MOST early adaptations of Stephen King's work, I see a cleanliness to the imagery that makes the subject matter that much more disturbing. If someone is stabbed to death on the street in broad daylight on a cul-de-sac out of FATHER OF THE BRIDE, I'm going to be quite a bit more jarred than if it's done to look hip and emo, or "ultra-realistic."

  • April 29, 2010, 1:11 p.m. CST

    Harry, you tipped if off in your review

    by skimn

    and your response. You went in with low (maybe even lower than low)expectations. So, a film that doesn't totally suck becomes a good film, a mediocre film a very good film, and a good film a great film. Its only natural to influence your take on the film. I know opinions are like assholes, but the general take on this movie is that its bad..just plain bad.

  • April 29, 2010, 1:23 p.m. CST

    Hmmmmmmmm

    by The_veiny_throbber

    I'm gonna see it purely because I loves me some Freddy Krueger action. I watched the first one when I was four and that fucker has creeped me out ever since. Don't like the comedic later version mind you although it did help to cure my fear of Freddy when I was younger. Some elements seem good in this one and some seem shit. They just need to get a director who actually cares about the character and genre. Simple no?

  • April 29, 2010, 1:39 p.m. CST

    Massawyrm

    by HELLSFOXES

    Sounds more legit in his review... just sayin

  • April 29, 2010, 1:42 p.m. CST

    I call BS

    by cylon_conspiracy

    There's no way this is a good movie. That's not a knock on anyone involved but an remake of NOES, no way it's good.</p> <p>Maybe having all the producers, the star of the movie in the audience with you made you feel the movie was "special".</p> <p>I'll wait till I read a real review by someone who likes movies but just saw it in a theater like a normal person.</p>

  • April 29, 2010, 1:48 p.m. CST

    this has to STOP NOW!!!!!

    by sam jacksons wig

    Who else is for boycotting Harry Fucking Knowles from reviewing on his own fucking site??? Come on you fat fuck! Take some fucking responsibility for the shit you are continually throwing at the people who visit your site in the hopes of finding an objective fucking movie review from someone who claims he has "passion" but is just a huge fucking sell out!!!!

  • April 29, 2010, 1:56 p.m. CST

    Harry I must respectfully disagree with your review.

    by Jobafet

    I had my advanced screening of A Nightmare on Elm Street last night and I'm sorry Harry but I have to totally disagree with you on this one. I'm a fan of your reviews, and although I don't always totally agree with you I usually agree with parts of your reviews, but not with this remake of NOES. I, like you really wanted to see Jackie Earl Haley play an amazing Freddy, but that just didn't happen. Now just to let it be know I'm not knocking Jackie in the slightest, because I do think he's one of the best actors working today, but I think the character was just poorly written. I felt like none of the characters had any real weight to them. Most of the dialogue was down right terrible, but the teenagers dialogue was hands down the worst throughout the film. In the beginning we have teenagers proclaiming they know that their dreams can kill them without any real evidence, and then when they should know that Freddy's capable of killing them in there dreams some of them begin to deny it. For example (Spoiler!) in the scene when Nancy's mother finally fesses up about Freddy's past involvement with the kids, by that point Nancy and Quentin have already seen what Freddy had done to their friends and they had already had encounters with him themselves, yet Quentin decides to believe Nancy's mother when she says Freddy is just in their heads. That is just bad, implausible writing plane and simple. Like you I thought Freddy's new look and Jackie's voice and persona fit the character well, but even with all of that the character needs to be written well, and this Freddy just wasn't written well at all. There was no depth to him, I felt like Freddy was just there killing these kids I never really knew why. Yes, we get his back story which was interesting, although kind of pasted over really quickly, but when he's actually there tormenting these teens I never felt his intensity. If Freddy was going after these kids because of what their parents did to him, I needed to feel his hatred towards them, but I never got that. Any way I really couldn't understand what they were trying to achieve with this remake. It didn't reinvent or give a new perspective on the franchise if anything I felt like it took a step back. Which is a shame because they had the tools to do something cool, but like all of the other remakes that Platinum Dunes has given us this film just felt like another cheap attempt to make money off of a past franchises success.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:09 p.m. CST

    Its Godzilla and Armageddon all over again..

    by Righteous Brother

    will we ever be set free?

  • April 29, 2010, 2:11 p.m. CST

    backn1981

    by USUCK

    The movie felt like a movie that was geared for an audience that had never seen a NOES before and not a generation that grew up on the original films. If you were 17 and dumb, you would love this movie in my opinion. The script is terrible and it scares me that the guy that wrote this script is tackling the thing next,wtf! There were moments of suspsense but it was rushed. It felt like a very short movie.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:17 p.m. CST

    Funny......

    by Zipperhead

    ....EVERYONE else is shitting all over this.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:24 p.m. CST

    Rob Zombie is rolling in his grave.

    by RPLocke

  • April 29, 2010, 2:24 p.m. CST

    I can't wait...

    by KHjLL

    I'm at 95 pages of ideas and storylines, plot, characters, I've been waiting for someone to reopen the franchise. Ever since I was a kid I always thought I would have something to do with A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and FRIDAY THE 13th who knows do time. I'm glad they started the franchise over maybe CRAVEN gets another shot at part 2. I know my ideas a perfect I took CRAVENS and DUNES approach and started with the pyschology of NIGHTMARES and used my own nightmares with FREDDY in them. I hope that I get a shot in one form or another to add my fingerprint to the 2 franchises I've loved since I was a kid.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:29 p.m. CST

    I glad HARRY liked it.

    by KHjLL

    Because so many people watch movies and forget what hollywood has been doing since it's birth. Making and remaking films. People who bash remakes should look at films in general which most today are compounds of other films with a different title thats no different than a remake. AVATAR is a prime example it's not a remake but a pallete of JAMES favorite films, books, and ideas. Even the scar on the gerneals face is an homage to TERMINATOR. THE CRAZIES was awesome, DAWN of THE DEAD was awesome THE WOLFMAN was fucking awesome. FRIDAY THE 13th was awesome.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:35 p.m. CST

    00%...

    by stellanskarsgaard

    on Rotten Tomatoes...just sayin'. Not how I pick my movies to watch, but 0% is never good.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:39 p.m. CST

    Really Harry? 00% on RT with 13 reviews

    by SithMenace

    Come on.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:44 p.m. CST

    ebert: "Wes Craven, the Ray Kroc of horror"

    by alice133

    lol. zing!.<p>http://tinyurl.com/2ac7wxy

  • April 29, 2010, 2:44 p.m. CST

    Harry, Just Stop.

    by reflecto

    It's one thing to "just love movies" and love the experience and blah blah blah. But that's not an excuse for taking the reins as a PR point man for the studios and then giving their films almost uniformly positive reviews so long as you are given passes, presents, etc. Even when you don't like a film you've been asked to promote, you refuse to admit it- we get a lot of bullshit like "I REALLY want people to go see this so they can make a GREAT sequel with this cast and/or director!" Fuck that, Harry. Just stop. You know that's wrong. You refused to review Cop Out because of a preexisting relationship with Kevin "Zoloft" Smith. You had to be bullied into reviewing Wolverine after they didn't give you "presents." You're coming off like a usable, abusable PR hack who hides behind a lot of gushing verbiage about his plain and simple "geek love for movies" to excuse some very obvious behavior. No one is fooled. Please just stop, and consider refusing a set visit or a private screening with the stars long enough to keep your opinion unsullied. Because right now it seems what you love more than "just the movies" is being part of the movies, and being tricked (yes, tricked) into thinking that any of these people, in front of or behind the camera, care about you and consider you one of them. They do not.

  • April 29, 2010, 2:56 p.m. CST

    How much did they pay for this review?

    by Piratebill

    Stopped coming here for a while when it became obvious the reviews arent objective. Logged in again today and find this review? fuck you harry, youre a disgrace

  • April 29, 2010, 2:59 p.m. CST

    Lies

    by DangerDave

  • April 29, 2010, 3:03 p.m. CST

    I smell Bull

    by donkey_lasher

    This years Crystal Skull

  • April 29, 2010, 3:07 p.m. CST

    Hey Harry...00%

    by la_sith

    FUCK YOU.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:12 p.m. CST

    la_sith

    by Miss 45

    You beat me to it. Ha! 00% so far baby.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:15 p.m. CST

    Miss 45

    by la_sith

    Hope it keeps up. Unfortunately, people will see in en masse this weekend, and Harry doesn't help. America, you win!

  • April 29, 2010, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Hey Harry

    by la_sith

    That "wretched shit" you call FURRY VENGEANCE? Also sitting at 00% on RT. Stop shilling, asshole.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:17 p.m. CST

    Why don't you all shut...

    by KHjLL

    Until you see the movie... You are all bashing a film you haven't seen. Most of the people who I've read a review for hated the fact that it was being remade when they went into the theater. All garbage reviews.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:17 p.m. CST

    The moment I saw in the trailer how...

    by tailhook

    they ruined the iconic scene of the hand coming out of the water(i.e. no knees to frame where the hand was 'headed'), I knew this wasn't worth my time. A Harry Knowles puff piece designed to pay future bills only cemented that fact. At least reviewers like Massawyrm haven't completely sold out their credibility in interests of making a buck. Yet.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:20 p.m. CST

    Harry/HEAD GEEK - whats your Freddys best to worst?

    by CARTMANEZ

    Hi Harry - loving the site as always . was wondering for such a die hard Freedy fan what you consider the best to worst as aside Wes Cravens New Nightmare ive only seens bit and bobs of the series and want to know what to bother with and what to miss...<p>

  • April 29, 2010, 3:22 p.m. CST

    Rotten Tomatoe community...

    by KHjLL

    is at 64%... I hate critics reviews of HORROR films unless they like horror films which is few and far inbetween... HARRY has the same views on the franchise as I so I'm going with the JESUS of HORROR... Thanks for the heads up on my most anticipated horror film or 2010...

  • April 29, 2010, 3:24 p.m. CST

    INSOMNIACS...

    by KHjLL

    I think THE trailer hit the nail on the head... Anybody here been up for more then a day... You start to see thing in a dream state of mind you brain functions in a dream state.. You start to see things that aren't there... Can't wait until tommorror I would see it tonight but I got to work at 5am in the morining until 9pm...

  • April 29, 2010, 3:26 p.m. CST

    Ebert

    by c4andmore

    What is up with Ebert lately with his 1 star reviews? I FINALLY caught Kick-Ass two days ago, and Ebert was WAAAAAAY wrong. That was at least a 3, maybe 4 star flick. Fun fun fun to watch.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:32 p.m. CST

    WOW! 00% At RT???

    by LaserPants

    Man, this movie must be fuckin' TERRIBLE. I don't think I've ever seen a movie get a 00%. Oh, I hope it bombs like nothing has ever bombed before. In other words, I hope it bombs even worse than KICK ASS.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:39 p.m. CST

    Drew/Mory's review is in

    by thatfilmlover

    http://tiny.cc/2usd1 - he says the film is "mediocre" while at the same time describing how terrible it is, the only glimmer of hope in the review is that he "wishes it was worse"

  • April 29, 2010, 3:39 p.m. CST

    CRITIC n HORROR

    by KHjLL

    Critics have been bashing horror for years. HALLOWEEN was bashed more then any film... It's wasn't until it was doing good at the box office that critics actually went back and re review the film that it got it's praise.... They bashed TEXAS, FRIDAy, and the original NIGHTMARE...

  • April 29, 2010, 3:41 p.m. CST

    I can see it now, come mid August

    by skimn

    on the DVD cover.."Platinum Dunes has made their very best film by leaps and bounds." Harry Knowles, Aint-It-Cool-News<p>Cuz, thats all Harry's reviews are good for nowadays, blurbs on DVD cases and posters (see GI Joe).

  • April 29, 2010, 3:46 p.m. CST

    Sounds like the goods

    by Seth Gecko

    Glad that critics are hailing this remake. Bayer is considered a very promising directorial talent. Haley is awesome and Rorschach is the man's man. If you took Jack Bauer and added Rorshcach the world would be terrorist free.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:46 p.m. CST

    ROTTEN TOMATOES

    by KHjLL

    Most critics haven't seen the film yet so the 00% is a garbage point for you guys to use as any kind of arguement.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:51 p.m. CST

    Don't worry, KHjLL

    by Ditch Brodie

    Once the rest of the critics see the film we'll use the very low percentage of positive reviews as an argument.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:52 p.m. CST

    6% now at RT

    by cifra

    ... but don't shoot the messenger, I love Hudson Hawk, one of the most trashed movies ever.

  • April 29, 2010, 3:58 p.m. CST

    More Critics Are Chiming In on RT

    by Dave I

    Last I checked it was at 6% positive with 18 reviews (only one was positive).<p><p>Roger Ebert gave it one-star. I find that kind of interesting only in that he seems a Jackie Earl Haley fan (really, who isn't), wrote fairly positively of Wes Craven's New Nightmare, but thought this was pretty boring and decidedly not scary. Also noteworthy in a way in that he rated it poorly, yet not out of some moral opposition ala. Kick-Ass or anything.<p><p>I'm still curious about it, would like to see them go off in a non-retelling/non-remake version post-origin in a sequel so that JEH can find his own voice and hopefully correct whatever is wrong with this version. That said, I'm lowering expectations and just hoping that it is kinda-fun and that (no matter how unlikely) any sequels end up being creepy and finding their own voice and letting JEH grow into the role while creating a compelling, non-campy, scary/unsettling story.<p><p>-Cheers

  • April 29, 2010, 4:14 p.m. CST

    Freddy etc

    by ProfGriffin

    Harry, speakign as someone who you KNOW to be as much of a NOES geek as you...(I was on stage at HacknSlash too!)...I am NOT in a hurry to see this. I'll see it, but not rushing out this weekend. Oh, and Fred Frueger was NEVER described as a Child Molestor...they called him a Child Murderer. Not making it any better...just bringing up a point! LOL I just don't like the make-up. I KNOW it's more realistic burn ward type of make-up but I miss the Dream Demon...the exaggerated brow, the deep set eyes...and Englund. OK. Thinking positively.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:19 p.m. CST

    the only other positive review on the internet is located here:

    by thatfilmlover

    http://tiny.cc/xznz7

  • April 29, 2010, 4:22 p.m. CST

    KHjLL

    by skimn

    Would really like to know where you get your information. Roger Ebert gave Halloween 4 stars days after its release. Time magazine gave it a full page write up and review soon after. I recall seeing very favorable reviews for Nightmare when it was released. Friday WAS hated by critics, calling it a poor imitation of Halloween, too dependent on gore effects. It was the fans that made that the cult classic it became.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Having just read Mori's review......Harry...

    by Righteous Brother

    I think you've got to take a good long look at yourself, your reviews and where you're heading. I can't believe you genuinely like this film or think it was a good idea to remake it. You used to rally against this sort of thing, and now your reviews are just gutless. I actually take all your reviews with a huge pinch of salt nowadays and find that, Quints, Massa's, Merrick's, Vern's and Capones reviews are much more reliable. Mori's review is eloquent, where yours is damn near incomprehensible. I'm not quite sure where you're at these days or what happened to you, but I miss the Harry Jay Knowles of old.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:27 p.m. CST

    I'm more disappointed by the Robin Hood reviews

    by MattmanReturns

    I expected Nightmare to suck. But a Ridley Scott film starring Russell Crowe? I did not expect that to suck.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:32 p.m. CST

    Harry's on Dunes payroll and this film is arse

    by barnaby jones

    Everyone one just needs to move on and ignore it. It's the best way to handle all this remake bullshit, if they don't make any money and don't get any publicity Hollywood will move on to something else. Simple as.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:46 p.m. CST

    MattmanReturns

    by skimn

    Guess you never heard of A Good Year..I've never seen it, but it looked deadly.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:49 p.m. CST

    Does anyone really care for Harry's reviews anymore?

    by Super Rabbi

    Seriously.

  • April 29, 2010, 4:53 p.m. CST

    yes.......

    by theDannerDaliel

  • April 29, 2010, 5:01 p.m. CST

    So Freddy is now a murdering child molesting Retard?

    by Cash907

    Oh yeah, sign me up for THAT! You're such a fucking studio shill Harry. Was the sellout process gradual, or quick, like your last cardiac event?

  • April 29, 2010, 5:12 p.m. CST

    If you have 2 see it buy a ticket to something else

    by TheJudger

    with the same showtime. Theres a large mindshare that says most of the ticket sales will be from people who want to see it to dog on it. Well dog away but raise the revenu of another picture. Like Kick Ass or something like that. I've done it. I might do it for this. Cause yeah I want to see and hate the fuck out of it. One thing I most certainly dont want to do though, is give PD my money. Fuck them.

  • April 29, 2010, 5:13 p.m. CST

    This was better then IRON MAN 2 !

    by james4543

  • April 29, 2010, 5:37 p.m. CST

    Why my friend Harry Knowles is dead wrong about

    by MobileAccess

    Nightmare on Elm Street. He liked it, that's why he's wrong.

  • April 29, 2010, 5:45 p.m. CST

    Another remake...

    by OmarLittleLives

    Why do we need to be force fed remakes? There are so many good horror books out there that could be made into movies. Yet we are retreading old material. I'm glad you liked it, Harry, and I'll likely watch it when it comes out on video just to see Freddy again, but Hollywood needs to get its shit together and growing some balls (and some imaginiation).

  • April 29, 2010, 5:48 p.m. CST

    Imagination that is...

    by OmarLittleLives

    Typing too fast can make a bad impression. :(

  • April 29, 2010, 5:59 p.m. CST

    Harry do you drop acid before each film?

    by fiester

    I'm trying to figure out why every movie you see is so balls-out awesomesauce. I do not think this movie is anywhere near as good as your tout it.

  • April 29, 2010, 5:59 p.m. CST

    Skimm .

    by KHjLL

    I just watched the HALLOWEEN doc... Everyone trashed the film on the release...

  • April 29, 2010, 6:01 p.m. CST

    Skimm

    by KHjLL

    Harry just gave A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4 stars and everyones still trashing it even thou they haven't seen it.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:03 p.m. CST

    EBERT

    by KHjLL

    TIME didn't give it a full page until HALLOWEEN was a hit... The critics thrashed that film on it's release... Which was released city by city not nationally... Most people didn't review it until it got to there city.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:11 p.m. CST

    Thefilmlover's remake list (for the heck of it)

    by Neosamurai85

    The Ring (U.S): this is an insteresting case where its radical deviations are easy to forgive when one considers how radically both films deviate from the novel (which , for example dealt with a hermaphrodite). That said, I agree; Gore's The Ring works fine as it's own thing. I love both versions without a very strong desire to compare them critically. The Hills Have Eyes: had the benefit of my not being terribly in love with the original (I'm sorry Wes, but it just hasn't aged well at all). That said, I wasn't really crazy about the film until the final act where it becomes about the father and the dog. I think it's a good example of how going the motions or trying to one-up the original scenes seldom works. But yeah, after everything that happens, that final act was a lot of intense gory fun. The Amityville Horror: Sorry, but no. I know a lot of people liked this, but I can't say that I'm one of them. It just strayed too far from the original text instead of reexamining the book from another angle. What is so central to the attraction of the first Amityville Horror is the claim that it really happened. What would interest me more about revisiting would be examining that case more sceptically. A more psychological repression venture perhaps, if one felt the need to go back to the material (you know, like An American Haunting... only not sucking tiny panda balls). Instead, they go for a rather different mythology that begs the question, why not make an original haunted house film? It's not like the iconography isn't recognizable in other films (The Exocist and The Shining). So leaving alone the author's rejection of the film (and death preventing the full pursuit of his lawsuit), it felt like the counter argument to The Ring and Hills Have Eyes... sometimes reinvention is just as bad an idea. Dawn of the Dead: Dawn works on the level of too fun to hate. It's filled with flaws, weak scenes, stupid scenes, but nonetheless, I'll admit I own the flick and still watch it from time to time. The biggest problem with it is still that it's called DAWN OF THE DEAD, but other than that it stands much stronger the many Zombie films (okay, not saying much) if not as great as others. MY BLOODY VALENTINE (in 3D): Dumb fun? Yes, but not fun enough. It took me a while to love Snyder's Dawn for what it is, but this one just missed the mark by too much. The problem with MBV3D is that it wants to be a balls out over the top super slasher popcorn party. Ok, that's fine. There are plenty of slasher films that it makes sense for an update to be nothing but that... but not My Bloody Valentine. The original was a late entry to the classic wave, but it was one of the strongest of them easily. For atmosphere there are few that compete. And thought it isn't devoid of humor or cheap kills, it by no means deserved some kind of Jason X treatment. So yes, I'll grant that on some level the slasher genre needed a movie like the remake... they just picked the wrong killer to go that route with. For me, it missed point about as hard as if they had made a Candyman In The Hood film, or a sequel to Psycho where they let bates out of the loony ben and he goes back to the hotel and people start dying Friday the 13th style... yeah... because they never did that... EVER... or made more sequels... trying to franchise the fuck out of it... nope... never tried that... (oh sweet denial, how you keep me going from one day to the next). Anyway, where was I? QUARANTINE: Ah yes, that one. Well frankly I can't imagine them having gotten one of my favorite horror films of the decade right, but in fairness I haven't seen it, so I'll not pretend to know if it sucked or not. For what it's worth though, I gather that praising Quarantine is not a particularly popular past time. So... meh. And finally... LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT: I do for the record give a bit of slack to remakes that rename. For one thing, I don't feel that it is really practical to say that this is the second remake of Bergman's The Virgin Spring (same source material, different direction... like The Ring films... almost). As a remake to the original I have to agree that it is largely superior. I do have a minor problems with it though. I don't fully agree that the rape scene is harder to watch. It's not easy by any means, but the cruelty is just... different. It is graciously not the torture porn I was expecting, and the character development is vastly preferred, however, the revenge arch is less complicated. The joy of the original is the parents become monsters themselves (something that does touch on the source and Bergman territory) you are left with a awkward feeling about how extreme the retribution is. It's a much more subversive experience. With this film, for all the fleshing out, the cruelty is much more about in the moment survival, and while I like that on a suspense level... it gives me less of the thing I most wanted more of. BUT WAIT!?!?! What about the Microwave scene? Wasn't that excessive torturous and morally... YES! GRANTED. However, it was also painfully, painfully stupid. I'm supposed to believe that this guy, whose daughter desperately needs medical attention, is going to take the time surgically paralyze a guy and McGyver a brain exploder out of broken kitchenware to kill him with? I'm sorry, but no. No, no, no-no-no! That scene droped the I.Q. of the film harder than a sledge hammer while lying on concrete. I appreciated all the vain attempts at comic relief being cut to make a level serious tone. The actors were all pretty top notch, but the film is just... off. The kind of film that annoys me more than the Dawn Remake because of how close it comes to getting it perfect, just to ultimately miss. So that the list of modern remakes. This ain't a bash or praise of Thefilmlover, just my thoughts on them. I feel like, especially when trying to summarize most of these, I'm left with lots of contradictions as to what works and what doesn't. The overarching theme is perhaps that I don't feel any of these worked for me because they went back to the original and retread the winning formula. However, most of the failures were films that missed something fundamental to those originals. A dynamic, an atmospheric tone, an idea that stayed with you after the effects became dated. As for Nightmare on Elm Street, I feel really are all rooting for Jackie first and foremost. I certainly do want the film to be good, but Platinum Dunes has baggage for me. We've seen shots of scene retreads, which in the case of Hills were the worst parts, but perhaps they could be utilized with different subtext. The claw in the bathtub is a happy return for me, what with the child molester background more explicit. It was always creepy, but perhaps now there is more to it to make us squirm. I'm not thrilled about the bed kills, the first and then Depp's were the highlights of the original and still live up after all this time. They don't need to be redone! I like the refrain from Freddy changing into things... but at the same time wonder if the dreams will be too unimaginative. The return to Freddy being scary is also appealing, but what I'm most concerned about is the idea. Can they resell the idea of Freddy, of that force that is scarier in concept than delivery? The origin story makes more sense with Freddy than the others, but I hate the track record with Platinum. So I'm on the fence. I'm expecting a let down, but can't deny spots for optimism. Somethings haven't aged well from the classic, admittedly. The real question is, will the new concepts of tone and narrative (and design... I'm standing by my hate of Platinum Dunes "Veneer") take the core elements that matter in interesting new directions that revitalize and reimagine the iconography being retread, or did nobody watch Freddy's Dead to see just how done to death Fredd's origin is? *shrugs*

  • April 29, 2010, 6:13 p.m. CST

    Oh yay...

    by Neosamurai85

    Got to love those typo ridden epic posts from casually writing in between doing other things... *again, shrug*

  • April 29, 2010, 6:18 p.m. CST

    The great Jackie Earle Haley.

    by venvariants

    Seriously, I have been a fan of Jackie's since I grew up with his roles. My favorite still is Mooch in Breaking Away - and he's such a likable guy in that, it's weird to see him play so many heavies. But he's damn good at it!! Who else could have brought that kind of sympathy to the performance in Little Children?? Now - I like Jackie Earle having a comeback, but I would hate to see him get typecast as the perv weirdo for the rest of his career. Jackie's a tremendous character actor, and I'd love to see him do a more romantic role, or something more dramatic..! But, hey - he was gone for a long time, so I'll take him in any role. I'd rather have Jackie Earle typecast as a heavy than not have him at all. This is still the best comeback we've had in many, many a year.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:29 p.m. CST

    Reading Drew's Review

    by Neosamurai85

    Embarrasses me to have admitted optimism for the film. I was almost never a candidate for seeing this in the theater... now I'm almost hoping it doesn't take forever to stream on netflix. I mean, seriously. That was a pretty level-headed detailed smackdown of this flick.

  • April 29, 2010, 6:56 p.m. CST

    God man can you get to the point

    by Phategod2

    Why in every review do we have to be treated to some portion of your freaking Life story

  • April 29, 2010, 6:59 p.m. CST

    Harry is entitled to his opinion but

    by funkyjunky

    I think it is quite possible that Harry enjoyed this film and if he did then good on him. Did he sell out? I do not think he did intentionally but I am sure if we got to visit the film set and be around people who were obviously enthusiastic about the film then it would be possible we could get caught up in the vibe too. Most of our problem with this movie is that it is a remake of a film that still stands up today and remaking this is unnecessary. Also half the fun of the original was that Freddy was such a fantastical villain and in no way believable. This made us comfortable watching all the killings. Now in the remake they are trying to make him more real and this does not interest me as there are enough freaks and child molesters in the real world without me paying to go and see one.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:13 p.m. CST

    funkyjunky

    by OmarLittleLives

    So true. For me, I'm sick of torture porn movies. Bring back classics good horror movies! Sure gore is part of a horror movie, but damn, we are so desensitized by it now that people are just making stuff to be sick and it isn't scary. Make movies out of books like this one: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0011UEEXC/ref=s9_qpick_gw_ir05?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-7&pf_rd_r=1TJ8AJWMC32F4NR3Q7WN&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=470938451&pf_rd_i=507846

  • April 29, 2010, 7:27 p.m. CST

    funkyjunky

    by Victor_Kros

    "Freddy was a fantastic villain and in no way believable". Actually, Freddy was most believable in Wes Craven's New Nightmare and perhaps the only film in the nightmare series where he felt truly vile, heartless, and hell-bent on killing for the sheer joy of taking lives. Ironically however while "Freddy" was played by Robert Englund, the character of "Freddy" turned out to be a demon taking the persona of the character rather than Freddy Krueger himself who returned back to his original roots in Jason vs. Freddy only to be kill-blocked by Jason. Freddy got his glove back but not much else. At least he got to kick the crap out of Jason's dumb ass and prove he's the better man. In this film Jackie's Freddy is already the better man, there is no equal or threat to him in the picture - his greatest weakness is the same checkout excuse, overconfidence and the fact one way or another the bad guy has to go down even if its to a punk ass one dimensional emo girl with no emotional connection to the audience or intelligence whatsoever.

  • April 29, 2010, 7:38 p.m. CST

    Harry's Attack of the Clones review

    by WerePlatypus

    Never forget. . .

  • April 29, 2010, 7:55 p.m. CST

    I saw it, Harry, you've got it all wrong

    by Ackro

    I don't think we saw the same film Harry. Or Michael Bay and Jackie Earle Haley can suck a mean critic-dick.   I've been a Freddy fan since seeing Dream Warriors in elementary school, 1988. I am in the film and horror business beacuse of Freddy Krueger. This film is a mediocre rehash. There is nothing special or new about the script, characters or style besides the ineffective way they try to give sympathy for the devil. We already know he's an evil motherfucker and he kills. If this is your first Nightmare, then let's talk logic. Freddy is solely a child molestor in this film(actually it's never said, only implied so you have to guess how terrible of things he's done). The parents kill him for what he's done. Ok, I get it. So why is he killing the kids he molested? Wouldn't he kill the parents? So WHY IN THE HELL IS HE KILLING?!! In the original story, HE KILLS KIDS! So when he materializes in dreams, it's logical that he continues what he originally loved doing. He didn't kill the people who killed him, (besides Nancy's parents in 1 & 3) he went for the kids. So why not have Freddy with a sex dungeon that he takes little preschoolers to in their dreams and molest them until they wake? Because the idea doesn't work!!!! Freddy KILLS because he likes it! Jackie Haley is given nothing to work with. He whines like a little girl when they're chasing him and has the deepest, fakest, most high-volume overdubbed voice ever. It really is ridiculous. I've never seen him in another film but he really doesn't add shit to this film because he isn't given shit to work with! And don't be fooled people, Freddy cracks jokes in this one, and only one is semi funny at all! Oh yeah, in case we've all forgotten, Freddy cracks jokes in ALL of the Elm Streets. The first was more serious than 3-8, but he's still laughing and talking shit. So it wasn't out of Freddy's nature to laugh while he kills. You stab him, he laughs at you! That's what makes Freddy Freddy, he's a sick fuck who will laugh at you when you rip his face off, make his tongue come through the phone and lick you, take the form of a Hall Monitor and tell you no running in the halls, cut your veins out and use you as a puppet. I'm tired of people saying that the only good one was the first one because they turned him into a joke. He's a fucking prankster, and that's what made him so accessible in the first place! That's the only reason why I would stop putting my hands over my eyes when watching Dream Warriors for the first time, because he makes killing funny and brutally awful at the same time. Back to the new one, very scene is so rushed and all of the plot points and motivations are implied so quickly it leaves you wondering what the fuck are these characters thinking? Did the watch a film called a Nightmare on Elm Street and so they already know what's going on and so have we so we don't need to feel any emotion for it? I could go on but I'm tired of writing about it. Listen to the rest of the critics and your gut and wait until this comes out on beta or laserdisc!

  • April 29, 2010, 8:02 p.m. CST

    Harry, loves the Phantom Menace!

    by I_Sharted

    and Godzilla 1998 and Blade II. Can you trust a man who said "Mesa Luved Him!" about Jar Jar Binks? STOP LYING TO PEOPLE HARRY! If it looks like shit and it smells like shit. Guess what? It's "goofy retarded fun" according to Harry.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:13 p.m. CST

    Will Smith writing a song

    by charabicharabia

    Is the only thing I agree with in this entire review... Can we get a review of furry vengeance instead? I want to read everyone's comments on that film instead (cause you know it'll be funny and I need to laugh !)

  • April 29, 2010, 8:23 p.m. CST

    "A Harry Knowles puff piece designed to pay bills"

    by Yoda's Ball Sack

    Best line I've read in a long time.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:24 p.m. CST

    So Harry is a Plant now????

    by Yoda's Ball Sack

    Say it aint so!!!!

  • April 29, 2010, 8:24 p.m. CST

    So Harry is a Plant now????

    by Yoda's Ball Sack

    Say it ain't so!!!!

  • April 29, 2010, 8:28 p.m. CST

    just remember..........

    by RefutetheHype

    Harry loves Jar-Jar Binks and is excited about fucking Freddy.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:48 p.m. CST

    also remember that tomorrow....

    by charabicharabia

    every man has a breaking point.... Harry Knowles Brown

  • April 29, 2010, 8:53 p.m. CST

    Visiting film sets is just a bad idea.

    by BigTuna

    I don't blame Harry if it affects his opinion, it might mine too, but you're opening yourself up to so much criticism by doing it. It affects your reviews and credibility.

  • April 29, 2010, 8:56 p.m. CST

    The TCM remake was terribly underrated.

    by BigTuna

    NOt as good as the original, but what fantastic, ugly atmosphere it had for a horror film. The thing just looks great. It doesn't deserve the crap it got. Friday the 13th Remake by the same people however, was terrible.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:09 p.m. CST

    Big Tuna

    by charabicharabia

    You're right on the same wavelength as me on the previous remakes.... I was totally cringing during TCM and I just scoffed at Friday the 13th....

  • April 29, 2010, 9:12 p.m. CST

    Honestly

    by HEADGEEK

    I'm pretty damn sure that Drew, Beaks or Massawyrm have a pair of Nightmare on Elm Street shoes - or are one tenth of the Krueger geek that I am. And I really could give a rat's ass what the popular opinion is. I know what the popular opinion was at our screening - in the lobby after the film as we sat around discussing the film or the 4 hours of chatting about the movie after that. Knowing each of those 3 reviewers intimately - this isn't a film that I'd ever trust their opinions on - as I know them and to a large degree how they approached this and the environment that they went into it with. That's not to say they are wrong and I'm right. There is no right and wrong in this case. Just as I feel everyone that thinks there's a pacing problem in the second act of IRON MAN 2 is fucking on crack. I get it... they just are not as hardcore an IRON MAN geek as me - and don't have the capacity to enjoy what was actually going on in that sequence. It wasn't quite made for them. <BR><BR>You folks that love to come at this from a "Check" point of view just come across as the most closed minded retarded dumbfucks that I've ever come across. The Film remains the same when screened in an empty room. If you play that film to 1 person, the opinion of that film will be an absolute positive or negative or mixed. But for every additional person you bring in - you bring in everything that has made them into the room. You bring in their histories with every film they've ever watched, every film discussion they've ever had... moments of personal memory and reflection. How much knowledge they have of the characters before hand, their personal beliefs that they've embued those characters with, from what they are expecting to see. <BR><BR>I know that I love the film. Spent a good deal on AIM with Capone schooling him on why he's wrong on the film too. Because I get pretty passionate about the movies I love, especially if I went in expecting to be miserable. But there's a difference going in expecting to be miserable, but not allowing that to poison you on the film - to where you're watching the film from a perspective of discovery instead of locating that which is alien or different from what has come before. <BR><BR>That said - everyone is welcome to their opinion - it comes free of charge from each of us - and is given to every set of eyes and ears that will listen to them. That's how this game works. <BR><BR>And you better believe I was paying attention like a laser beam on the movie. Why? Because I love Freddy Krueger - always have - even when he was turned into a cartoon of his original intention, because I realized that was simply making the character to different entry levels for people to discover the character. <BR><BR>How ever you interpret this posting, know this... I'd sit down in a bar with just about anyone and passionately defend and have a shit load of fun doing it. I really do feel that every single review I've seen is missing the film that I saw, recognized and accurately described. But like, that's totally my opinion.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:15 p.m. CST

    big tuna

    by HEADGEEK

    um, Capone went to the set of this film, and he didn't like the movie. Me, I didn't visit squat. I also didn't sign a petition protesting the existence of the film. Call me crazy, but I went into this to see how the mere substitution of Jackie Earle Haley for the persona of Robert Englund - would affect not only the character of Freddy Krueger - but the film and other characters around that performance.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:20 p.m. CST

    sorry Harry but this time you are who is wrong,DEAD wrong

    by ominus

    heh you had it coming my man.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:22 p.m. CST

    Harry question: which Krueger's potrayal do you prefer?

    by ominus

    Englund's or Haleys? i know they are supposed to be different,but which one do you like more?

  • April 29, 2010, 9:36 p.m. CST

    All Harry's Reviews

    by starlesswinter7

    Does every single Harry review have to include "I LOVE THAT!!!!" Please stop.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:45 p.m. CST

    SKIMm

    by KHjLL

    Just watched the DOC ... EBERT didn't review HALLOWEEN until it was released in CHICAGO a month after the film was released and was already a hit...

  • April 29, 2010, 9:46 p.m. CST

    http://twitter.com/AintItFatNews

    by HairyKnollsTwitter

    http://twitter.com/AintItFatNews

  • April 29, 2010, 9:48 p.m. CST

    Impossible to like the entire franchise

    by SimonDunkle

    Only about 3 of the Nightmare films are quality. Freddy's Dead is crap. Can't even remember number 4. New Nightmare was ok but wasn't really 'inside' the series. Freddy Vs Jason was FUCKED. There's no way that Harry could have that much love for mediocrity, just as only a person with an 86 IQ score could like all the Halloween/Fri the 13th movies.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:50 p.m. CST

    sometimes harry just love bad movies

    by cloudrider`

    why dont you guys just accept that. he's no sell out, never has been. he just love and adore crap from time to time. of course, he would never admit to himself he has a lousy taste(who would anyway?) and can always find justification for said crap in his own mind. that's what makes harry harry. if you want reliable reviews, look elsewhere. if you've been here a while you would know that already.

  • April 29, 2010, 9:58 p.m. CST

    Well, I'll say this much...

    by drew mcweeny

    ... you're right. I'm not as big a Freddy Krueger geek as you are, because I think the majority of the "Nightmare" films are straight up crap. I think it diffuses a movie monster to keep bringing him back over and over and making him funnier and funnier. I don't think there's a single scary moment in any of the films except the first, the second, and "New Nightmare." <P>I think for those audience members who like their boogeymen so familiar they are completely toothless, a la Michael Myers or Freddy or Jason, and who don't actually like horror films that are either scary or well-made, this should be a triumph.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:02 p.m. CST

    I stopped trusting Harrys reviews when he said Roland Emmerich

    by puchitorivera

    I stopped trusting Harrys reviews when he said Roland Emmerich Godzilla was good...sheesh

  • April 29, 2010, 10:10 p.m. CST

    Of course Harry gushes over this film...

    by Fleet

    ...Every single other review I've read on this site has bagged it to the point where they've literally said "DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME SEEING THIS MOVIE!" - It's only natural Harry rave about it...

  • April 29, 2010, 10:18 p.m. CST

    RE: Honestly

    by Victor_Kros

    "I'd sit down in a bar with just about anyone and passionately defend and have a shit load of fun doing it." And you'd flawlessly lose every point you bring up trying to "school" people who actually understand film instead of just sucking up to it whether it's use of technology, studio perks, personal friendship, or in your case fueling your own ignorant ego trying to "convince" everyone you have a clue what the hell you're actually talking about with your "passion" for movies. You’d have a shit load of fun doing it sure, while getting your ass handed to you. Yeah, you're a fan of movies and we get that but when you try and "school" people on why they have to see your stonewalled point of view, it just comes across desperate to convince “yourself” you are right, especially with your obviously flawed track record of non-influenced reviews. Keep your fanboy love of “Nightmare” Harry but somewhere in all that tunnel vision appreciation bullshit you spin for this “new nightmare” also find your non-biased balls. I'll welcome a "debate" with you about this horribly flawed film any time. I’ll even give you a pass on your horrid, grade school grammar. Capone, Mr. Beaks, Massawyrm, Rotten Tomatoes, Roger Ebert, Drew McWeeney - they all say you're full of rotten shit. It’s kind of hard to "school someone" when you've already failed the exam by every instructor more educated and experienced than you are, people who understand how to review a film in a non-subjective manner. Seriously, try a slice of humble pie - you'll like it. I don’t need to attack your spelling, your weight, or your personal handicaps. All I have to do is point out the obvious and watch you desperately try to justify your shortcomings against a legion of people who disagree with you including Capone. Class dismissed.

  • April 29, 2010, 10:18 p.m. CST

    ...and while we're on it...

    by Fleet

    ...Read Massa's review... It's spoiler ridden, but you get a far, far better idea of the scope of this film through his crit versus Harry's "It's awesome because it's so fvcking awesome!" review...

  • April 29, 2010, 11:19 p.m. CST

    There's a lot of arrogance there, Harry

    by reflecto

    You claim no one is right or wrong yet you then say that people who don't get Film X or Y (in this case, the ANOES remake and Iron Man 2 - the latter of which I will reserve judgment on) are just misinformed because they're not as much of a "hardcore fan" as you and "it wasn't made for them." Uh, these films are projected towards the general audience who may never have seen a Nightmare or Iron Man film before. They WERE made for them and if someone doesn't like it, then at least in that general viewer's eyes, the film has FAILED. It's a cheap and foolish defense to claim that every bad film you laud on this website, be it this remake or Hatchet or whatever else, is actually "good" because "it's really made for the hardcore genre fan of (insert topic here), not for the masses." That is a lazy fucking excuse which you as well as a great many industry bloodsuckers have used to excuse the downfall of American horror and a series of failed "great white hope" films AICN has championed in the last decade.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:24 p.m. CST

    WTF? http://twitter.com/AintItFatNews

    by james4543

  • April 29, 2010, 11:42 p.m. CST

    This site needs a podcast!

    by Modus

    There should seriously be an Aint It Cool Podcast where all the writers on here could talk about movie news and debate movies like this.

  • April 29, 2010, 11:42 p.m. CST

    I look forward to Capone's review

    by Ditch Brodie

    Seeing as he took the time to write up the reports about last year's set visit(s?) and seeing as he witnessed the creative process of the movie, I'm curious as to why he didn't like the movie. I expect he'll post his review in the next day or two.

  • April 30, 2010, 12:05 a.m. CST

    Ebert gave it 1 star

    by bluebottle

    I look forward to your "blog" about how he is dead wrong.<p></p> I mean, I assume that's what you think since you've already said within this talkback that Capone was "wrong".<p></p>

  • April 30, 2010, 12:23 a.m. CST

    WTF? http://twitter.com/AintItFatNe ws

    by classicgamenerd

    Oh my god, this RULES!!

  • April 30, 2010, 12:33 a.m. CST

    Do you really eat popcorn left in theaters?

    by classicgamenerd

  • April 30, 2010, 12:56 a.m. CST

    PODCAST

    by Tacoloft

    I second that Modus. Especially when there are extreme polars reviewing a movie like this one.

  • April 30, 2010, 1:21 a.m. CST

    harry this review was totally irresponsible

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    you almost got me to waste $10 on this piece of shit. thankfully Beaks talked some sense into me.

  • April 30, 2010, 1:37 a.m. CST

    Harry, you owe me $10.

    by Stifler's Mom

    This movie fucking blew and everybody in the midnight screening seemed to agree. If there's one single reason the remake NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET, it would be to make Freddy scary again. This movie failed miserably on that level. Fucking Freddy Vs. Jason had more scares.

  • April 30, 2010, 1:41 a.m. CST

    Plants gotta run sites too you know

    by AlwaysThere

  • April 30, 2010, 1:56 a.m. CST

    Watch out! Harry liked it!

    by Motoko Kusanagi

    Normally, this doesn't bode well for a movie.<p>I keed, Harry, I keed. :-P

  • April 30, 2010, 1:59 a.m. CST

    Pretty sure Frank Darabont already got a crack at The Dream Warr

    by GhostJax

    When it was released as Nightmare on Elm Street 3: The Dream Warriors. It was the first film he ever wrote. I mean, yeah, Chuck Russell officially directed it, but they were writing partners and Darabont was basically co-director on the film. True story: the Freddy-worm from NoES 3 was originally the red-pink color of Freddy skin, but was changed to green at the last minute when Darabont arrived on set and said, "It looks like she's being eaten by a giant cock!"

  • April 30, 2010, 2:40 a.m. CST

    Fucking hell Harry's turning into....

    by Righteous Brother

    Charles Foster Kane.

  • April 30, 2010, 2:56 a.m. CST

    Oh that helped.

    by gotilk

    Instead it made it look like she was being eaten by a giant, green infected cock.

  • April 30, 2010, 2:57 a.m. CST

    I have no problem with opinions...

    by thefifthman

    Harry, I'm tired of people treating their opinions on message boards as if they are the "facts" so I appreciate your post and opinion....however, your post comes across as if people who hate this film (or the new Iron Man) just don't appreciate the characters as much as you. This comes across, as you put it, "retarded" the same way some of the lesser posts have been. Even if you truly feel that way, you really think the creative team behind the new NOES loves Freddy like you do? A team of true Freddy geeks pushed through the exact things that were needed, rather than semi-horror fans making one more money grab? That seems pretty out there. Signed - a freddy fan who is expecting another half assed "darker" take on films i have loved (but still hoping to be wrong).

  • April 30, 2010, 2:59 a.m. CST

    10% on RT with 40 reviews

    by SithMenace

    If not for Furry Vengeance it would be the worst reviewed movie of the year.<p>Actually, Furry Vengeance is getting trashed so bad I actually kind of want to see it now. But there's no way I'll pay to see it.

  • April 30, 2010, 3:05 a.m. CST

    Soooo, we're welcome to our opinions or

    by SithMenace

    we're closed minded retarded dumbfucks? That wasn't very clear.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:37 a.m. CST

    Everyone involved should eat a bag of dicks.

    by GhostDad

    Just caught a midnight screening. The crowd booed at the end. Not just the hardcore nightmare fans, EVERYONE booed the hell out of this movie. I had no expectations, but went with a friend who lives and breaths horror flicks, has Freddy tattooed on his back, and drank the kool aid and was totally excited about this movie. His expression the entire movie was the expression you see in photos of concentration camp prisoners, blank, hopeless. He was silent the entire drive back to his place, when he just blurted out "That wasn't Freddy." I hope you enjoy the set visit to whatever movie this review earned you, Harry.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:37 a.m. CST

    IT WAS FUCKING GREAT!

    by bueno_bob

    Just got back from the midnight showing. As a LONG TERM FAN of the franchise ('84, bitches), I loved every fucking second of it. Winner in EVERY SENSE OF THE WORD. Don't believe the hype - go see it yourself. FUCKING WONDERFUL MOVIE, absolutely great!

  • April 30, 2010, 4:39 a.m. CST

    GhostDad

    by bueno_bob

    Everybody booed, hunh? Well, guess audiences must be vastly different, because we had a full theater of people FUCKING CHEERING. Go figure.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:41 a.m. CST

    Stifler's Mom

    by bueno_bob

    Freddy vs. Jason had more scares? LMAO. What planet was that version of the film released on?

  • April 30, 2010, 4:45 a.m. CST

    "I’m excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER"

    by henrydalton

    ...and that was not what I thought I was fucking getting on board tonight.

  • April 30, 2010, 5:02 a.m. CST

    This film

    by Pimpin-Ken

    ...is so bad, I'd rather wank my dad off than watch it again. You can use that on the poster if you like, Platinum Dunes.

  • April 30, 2010, 5:02 a.m. CST

    Also, Jackie is mediocre at best in this.

    by GhostDad

    Harry, I understand that you're rooting for the guy. I am too. I've liked him in just about everything he's ever been in. He deserves a turn in a big franchise, but COME ON! What did he bring to the table here? What new element did he bring to Freddy Kruger? The rubbing of his fingers? His delivery was cribbed from Englund, but in his Rorschach voice. He was too small to be the least bit intimidating and he was saying lines directly lifted some some of the worst of the Nightmare Sequels. The majority of folks at my theater groaned the first time they saw and heard Freddy. The script didn't help him, but there was nothing that Jackie did to make this Freddy his own. And it's VERY possible for other actors to play beloved characters.. look at Dracula. Lugosi is probably the most recognized, but when you watch Christopher Lee play Dracula, you don't think about Lugosi even though it's a familiar character in a familiar story. And I'm not gonna accept the "Let's give him the benefit of the doubt and see how he does in a sequel" excuse that's thrown out a lot. I really like the actor, I was really pulling for him to do a good job, and I think he didn't pull it off. He didn't need to make me forget about Englund, he just had to make me not hope that Englund would come out from around the corner every time we saw Jackie's Freddy. And I'm a Freddy fan since I was a kid.. hell, I wrote Robert Englund a letter when I was 9 and he wrote back, I still have his reply.

  • April 30, 2010, 5:56 a.m. CST

    THE ORIGINAL WAS STUPID

    by Nicksb

    AND NOT SCARY AT ALL. ANYONE THAT LIKES IT IS A MORON OR A GIRL

  • April 30, 2010, 7:04 a.m. CST

    TRUST NO-ONE'S OPINION BUT YOUR OWN!

    by Tandemar

    At the end of the day we can all whine about how the ginger fat-lad is getting handjobs from the studios to wax lyrical about their latest pale offerings... But hey! do YOU like evry movie that your friends like? Have you never gone head to head defending something that you think is "classic" to a friend or acquaintance who would rather tear off their testicles than even spend five seconds in the same room with? Yeah we know Harry has no life and his opinions are mostly those of a five year old...a five year old what has yet to be decided... But this is his site, and he can say what he wishes. If you choose to believe him and not make up your own mind then more fool you. Basically this site is not for reviews, it's for news.

  • April 30, 2010, 7:25 a.m. CST

    So, once again Ebert's wrong...

    by Foucault

    Jesus.

  • April 30, 2010, 7:37 a.m. CST

    Not believable

    by doubleh55

    Harry said "that said - it is pretty much superior in all ways save for the wall paper moment." BULLSHIT. There is no possible way that this film is superior in all ways. So you actually prefer Rooney Mara's Nancy to Heather Lengenkamp's Nancy? I do not believe that for a second. Personally the comments after the review really seem to make it look like Harry loves money and perks a heck of a lot more than he loves Nightmare on Elm Street.

  • April 30, 2010, 7:52 a.m. CST

    I have just seen this movie....

    by sam jacksons wig

    ...and I hated every single frame of it. Not only me, but the vast majority of the people in the theatre despised it. Fucking travesty.

  • April 30, 2010, 8:27 a.m. CST

    Why everyone else is dead

    by Cockofgod

    wrong about Nightmare on Elm Street. <p><br />Their mother's suck Cock in hell

  • April 30, 2010, 9:03 a.m. CST

    I'm your boyfriend now, Nancy

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Kill for me, Jesse. Kill needless Hollywood remakes.

  • April 30, 2010, 9:05 a.m. CST

    Moriarty made a good point

    by koie

    I think I'm siding with Mori on this one. Most of the previous Freddy movies were shit. And as far as horror movie villians go... Freddy wasn't very good. With those things in mind, I am still scratching my head, wondering why they even bothered remaking the movie. Hopefully it loses enough money that they don't bother making any more. Haley needs to stick with better film projects and not get stuck in a rutt making lousy horror films like his freddy predecessor was stuck doing.

  • April 30, 2010, 9:14 a.m. CST

    "Anvils of charisma" was the best part...

    by Jared Syn

    Does Freddy kill Tanner Boyle in this?

  • April 30, 2010, 9:51 a.m. CST

    KHjLL

    by skimn

    Thanks for the info..I just think a blanket statement that critics have it out for horror films was a bit overreaching.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:03 a.m. CST

    Harry you CAN'T SAY no one is right or wrong about this movie

    by D.Vader

    And then in your next paragraph say Capone is dead wrong with his opinion about this one. That just does not make sense.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:14 a.m. CST

    Bollocks!

    by The_veiny_throbber

    I've spelt vieny wrong. That is all.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:18 a.m. CST

    No I haven't.

    by The_veiny_throbber

    Good lord I'm retarded. And that's why I'm going to pay to see this undoubtedly mediocre film. Bam! Not until May 7th though 'cos I'm in England ain't I like. Hyuk yuk yukedy yuk.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:26 a.m. CST

    Pipin Ken

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Funniest quote of the week by far, thank you sir

  • April 30, 2010, 10:39 a.m. CST

    At least New Nightmare is getting some love

    by D.Vader

    I love how meta that film is, and I'm a big fan of creepy trench coat Freddy.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:02 a.m. CST

    The movie is just not good

    by sandman325

    I'm a Freddy fan. No I didn't have Freddy sneakers. But to this day Freddy stands as my favorite modern day monster. I love Jackie Earle Haley as well. But he didn't have a whole lot to do in this film. Freddy wasn't really played for laughs, which I think was a good decision. As to the eyes of Haley as Freddy? It seems to me that Harry was looking for things to love about the film and had to pick a few ancillary things to like because the overall film was weak. Every "scare" was a cheap jump scare. All the best scenes that weren't jump scares were ripped straight out of earlier "Nightmare" films. Visually the film is low in quality. Every character in the film not Freddy is uninteresting. This includes Clancy Brown. The movies bad, save your money. I'd rather watch "Legion" again because I can at least laugh at that. Nightmare isn't as bad as a few other films I've seen this year but it's the worst kind of bad. Bad but not bad enough to laugh at for the duration. It's on the level of Rob Zombies "Halloween 2" without being as good visually. Uh, I can live without more "Nightmare" films if they are gonna be like this.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:04 a.m. CST

    In Defense of Harry

    by BobParr

    I would imagine seeing these movies in a packed theater with a wild crowd that wants to love the movie would influence his opinion. I've seen many movies on opening night and I walked away thinking it was great until later seeing it in a half empty theater or DVD and realizing it was meh.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:10 a.m. CST

    every writer on this site other than harrry is saying STAY AWAY

    by EddieMurphysLaugh

    Thats what..a 6-1 difference. Yeah I think I'll play those odds thanks.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:18 a.m. CST

    Pretty much stop reading his review right at this point..

    by EddieMurphysLaugh

    "SO – to say I went into tonight’s screening with a great deal of trepidation is very accurate. We had the Platinum Dunes dudes coming in. Some hot shot commercial director that I wasn’t familiar with. And then Jackie Earle Haley, someone that was the reason I was throwing this event was coming" Why even mention that Harry? And then its laughable when you say "Capone got the set visit and he hated the movie, I didn't visit shit"..Of course not Harry, because I guess studio circle jerks don't count as "set visits"

  • April 30, 2010, 11:31 a.m. CST

    C;mon Harry....

    by radioflyer

    You really need to address this conflict of interest - - if you are hobknobbing and being feted by the makers of these films, you cannot write an honest, objective review. I've seen this film - and you and I both know that it's a waste of everyone's time. You have a choice to make - - and it's something that your underlings at AICN are afraid to tell you because you are "the boss" The choice is - YOU MUST EITHER BE A STUDIO SUCKUP/LACKEY OR AN OBJECTIVE MOVIE REVIEWER, YOU CAN'T BE BOTH. This remake is the very definition of a cold, unfeeling, careless and empty piece of quick buck trash, and I hope that the makers are punished for it at the box office. Shame on you, Harry Knowles....shame on you.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:51 a.m. CST

    Harry is VERY Popular...

    by benlinus

    but for all the wrong reasons. I remember some, oh, 10 years ago, when people would come on this site excited to read a Harry review or his latest "scoop" ya know, remember "Cool News?!" Now, pretty much everyone on this site comes here to ridicule Harry, make fun of him, call him out on his bullshit, yadda yadda yadda. I mean the only reason I read Harry's reviews now is just to see how much shit he gets in the talkbacks. I mean, cmon, isnt that the reason we ALL come here? To call Harry out and tell him what an asshole he is. Harry is pretty much universally hated by the AICN tb'ers and I would wager, judging by the recent black box comments, his peers as well. And the really point here is that Harry just doesnt give a shit anyomre, he really doesnt. Harry is an attention whore, thats what he is. He wants to be popular, he wants to be relevant. Hence, he throws these Austin bashes and gets actors, directors, execs, etc. to show up, and Harry becomes the center of attention. Harry doesnt want to burn any bridges, so he posts a favorable review. Basically this site has become Harry's dick and he WANTS to keep fucking, so why would he stop? Harry's not gonna change, hes NEVER gonna change. He will continue to be the way he is til his last breath. Everything about Harry is materialistic and fake. This is the way he is. All we can do is continue to bitch about it, and we WILL!

  • April 30, 2010, 12:29 p.m. CST

    My question is...

    by KabutoKoji

    Will Harry pull a Godzilla here and say how shitty he thinks the New Nightmare is after we've all told him it's utter crap? How do you spell hypocrite? It starts with an "H" as in Harry, right? Listen, let's not kid ourselves. This movie was produced by Michael Bay. Nothing ever touched by Michael Bay will have any quality or purpose and will never be any good. He is the king of the lowest common denominator. Michael Bay makes products for people who exist in the bowels of low culture and for people who are easily distracted by shinny things. And Harry is the epitome for this. Wait, Freddy Krueger has a shinny glove in one of his hands, right? Uh oh.

  • April 30, 2010, 12:41 p.m. CST

    The number one reason I will NEVER see this cumstain...

    by immortal_pirate

    ...the trailers. The trailers said it all. Michael Bay and Platinum Dunes have no idea how to tell a story much less market one. The trailer for NOES was so disjointed, badly edited. There's no protagonist, no obvious characterization...and Freddy sounds like Elmer Fudd. Harry....stop. Just...stop. You are trying to pander a huge cumstain to a public that has more intelligence than PD and Michael Bay, and yes, even you give us credit for. BTW that little fit you threw earlier was classic. I laughed.

  • April 30, 2010, 12:41 p.m. CST

    The number one reason I will NEVER see this cumstain...

    by immortal_pirate

    ...the trailers. The trailers said it all. Michael Bay and Platinum Dunes have no idea how to tell a story much less market one. The trailer for NOES was so disjointed, badly edited. There's no protagonist, no obvious characterization...and Freddy sounds like Elmer Fudd. Harry....stop. Just...stop. You are trying to pander a huge cumstain to a public that has more intelligence than PD and Michael Bay, and yes, even you give us credit for. BTW that little fit you threw earlier was classic. I laughed.

  • April 30, 2010, 12:41 p.m. CST

    yay!!

    by immortal_pirate

    my first double post! SCORE!

  • April 30, 2010, 12:54 p.m. CST

    So Harry's trainers have cobwebs on them?

    by THE_LAST_FISH_PUNCHER

    No surprise there...

  • April 30, 2010, 12:56 p.m. CST

    What a coincidence!!

    by BitterMan23

    I always tend to love movies when the producer takes pictures of my shoes for his Twitter account beforehand. Harry you and I are kindred spirits!!

  • April 30, 2010, 1:05 p.m. CST

    David Manning is alive!

    by RexNebular

    Changed his name and moved from The Ridgefield Press to AICN.

  • April 30, 2010, 1:36 p.m. CST

    My favorite quote from Harry...

    by kayleefan

    by HEADGEEK Apr 29th, 2010 06:07:29 AM "I'm not going to say it was better than the original - because the original owns me personally..." "that said - it is pretty much superior in all ways save for the wall paper moment." That's fuckin' gold.

  • April 30, 2010, 1:55 p.m. CST

    so simply put with this remake,Bay has raped our

    by ominus

    childhood one more time.

  • April 30, 2010, 2:09 p.m. CST

    I can't wait to see this just because...

    by ufoclub1977

    I want to evaluate Harry's review. I do think he is point on later on in this thread about what a film viewing experience is when you bring in people. I have seen 2 entire packed audiences love and be gripped by a movie that only a month later after wide release got panned by many more solo viewers... who can guess what that was?

  • April 30, 2010, 2:42 p.m. CST

    Harry, it's clear that you have really bad taste.

    by I_Sharted

    Time to switch to a management role and keep your reviews to yourself. You're doing no one any good blabbering on about how great shitty movies like this are man. I'd drink a beer and watch a movie with you but I wouldn't let you pick the movie.

  • April 30, 2010, 2:53 p.m. CST

    I will say this, which could be taken as being...

    by Neosamurai85

    ... in Harry's defense, I guess: Ebert's review sucks. I'm not saying that because he gave it one star where it should have two or one and a half or something like that, but simply because it is too lazy. It reads like he didn't even watch the film, and honestly I'm suspicious of that. Beaks and Mori, and Capone all actually bothered to break down the problems they found with it, but Ebert, who I long ago realized was not someone to trust in the horror genre when he hated Blue Velvet and then went on to more recently give Saw a higher rating than Wolf Creek, makes a bad joke about sound effects. If you can't bother to try, why should we bother to read? I fully expect Ebert to say the film sucks, but as a critic I also expect him to break it down. He flat out refuses, so... thanks for the waste of time Roger.

  • April 30, 2010, 2:54 p.m. CST

    wow.....Harry DOES have a breaking point ! Hahaha

    by charabicharabia

    I'm going to say something nice here about both Beaks and Harry. I completely agree with Harry when he said that most of the later Freddy movies were pretty shite....At this point I thought 1 was scary as hell 2 was creepy as all f(*& and 3 was fun...and 4 was like a sequel to 3 and then WHO CARES ! I agree with Beaks the first Freddy was sneaky and smart and bad-a@@ and Englund was just incredible in the role so why bother remake. So my final verdict is this: imagine a movie that's scarier than anything Freddy 3 and onwards but doesn't quite have the character of the originals 1 and 2 (I still am confused about 2 btw ....don't know whether to love it or dismiss it all together !). Beaks is not looking at this with a wide angle and Harry doesn't seem to give us enough comparison to what WAS god about the original ones. Perhaps we should think of this as Freddy 1.5 and say: "damn good sequel?"

  • April 30, 2010, 3:03 p.m. CST

    wait a minute......

    by benlinus

    Saw rated higher than Wolf Creek??!! that is fucked up...Wolf Creek is a solid solid film and brilliantly shot with hi-def cameras i believe. The outback has never looked so good

  • April 30, 2010, 3:13 p.m. CST

    Yup

    by Neosamurai85

    Wolf Creek scored a ZERO, and Saw got two stars. I respect Roger's opinion on a lot of things, but not horror. Though it is sometimes interesting when he does like a horror film.

  • April 30, 2010, 3:28 p.m. CST

    Harry's so obsessed with being Haley's "buddy"

    by reflecto

    He'll give a favorable review to ANY movie which might help Jackie Earle Haley.

  • April 30, 2010, 3:29 p.m. CST

    The only Platinum Dunes horror worth a damn was F13.

    by reflecto

    I quite liked that. The TCM films are crap, always will be despite the camp that tries to pretend the remake's any good by virtue of Jessica Biel's tits.

  • April 30, 2010, 3:32 p.m. CST

    It was...eh...

    by Bramton1

    But the crowd did applause at the end. I overheard someone outside the theater bitching that the movie should have started with making the glove. Which I disagree with. Anyway, it was better than some of the sequels, but not as much fun.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:06 p.m. CST

    A NGIHTMARE ON ELM STREET

    by KHjLL

    Was fucking awesome. I'm glad they made it the way they did. I've already started brainstorming ideas. I'm so glad they opened the doors for sequels.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:07 p.m. CST

    Thanks Harry, I didn't know about the Nikes. Just bought.

    by WickedJester

    I didn't pay anything inordinate though. They're all fakes anyway, so why pay anything more than $70.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:23 p.m. CST

    Oh and everyone at the showing...

    by KHjLL

    Where all happy with the film and were talking about how much they liked the fact that it was updated and couldn't wait for a sequel. Now the franchise can go anywhere. I've got some closets in my nightmares I would like to explore. SKIMM your right I was a bit harsh on critics. I just love all HORROR films. Whoever didn't like HATCHET get a lige and tell me a better film that you have made. HACHET was the shizzzzzzzzzzznizzle.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:29 p.m. CST

    Sigh....Harry

    by Joker2683

    Can we all agree that Harry has either gone senile or is being bribed by the studios to write these reviews. He lost a lot of credibility with me when he gave Van Helsing a great review. However, at this point I'm afraid I have to just give up. This is the last review I'll be reading by Harry. I find Capone and Massawyrm far more realistic and if it wasn't for them and Hercules I would probably dump this site all together. Harry's great reviews for bad movies hurts the legitimacy of Ain't it Cool. I hope some day he wakes up and realizes what a douche he's been. Harry used to be a damn good reviewer and I hope he will be again some day.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:42 p.m. CST

    HARRY was right with his review, the others werent.

    by nrn

    For Beaks: Just got back from seeing the movie. First of all WHAT the hell movie were you watching Beaks? A Nightmare on Elm Street '10 was fucking amazing. For one THEY had no Stereotype casting. (AKA the Jock, The Slut, The Token Black Dude). Secondly Freddy in this incarnation was 300% more scary than Robert Englunds Freddy EVER was. Third - What the hell were you smoking? "Kids jumping into other kids conversations, no other explination than their dreams are killing them" Bullshit, for the first 1/2 of the movie they are exploring the possibilities that they are having REPRESSED MEMORIES. Were you too high on crack to notice that part? Secondly they tried to justify it through the whole first part of the movie.<BR><BR> This was quite simply put the BEST Nightmare movie, Second only to New Nightmare. Herc was dead on in his review, Beaks has no water with me now as it seems he didn't even watch the fucking movie. <BR><BR> OH and on the subject of jumping into convos.. It only happens once in the movie, at a part where the kids are talking in a normal room voice, and everyone is standing about 4-5 feet from them. Of course your going to fucking jump in on a convo about a dream guy wanting to kill you if you too are having the same dreams. Use fucking logic Beaks.<BR><BR> For the haters:<BR><BR> It seems they just want it to be a shot for shot remakes Of their beloved 20 year old movie. As the movie is set in MODERN TIMES, (it even shows the kids school dates as 1996/1997.) There is no fucking way a shot by shot remake could have worked. They took the story and made it their own. I am now in the first time ever of remake history hoping for an actual sequel to this movie. Bring on the Dream Warriors!<BR><BR> I have been following Harry's reviews since the site started and hes only ever let me down twice. Harry is right, this movie is good. You SHOULD give it a chance.

  • April 30, 2010, 4:54 p.m. CST

    Harry is this movie better or worse than Bruno?

    by wash

    If you answer please specify if you mean Bruno as seen last summer or as seen last Fall.

  • April 30, 2010, 5:58 p.m. CST

    Harry is right. Everyone has a opinion.

    by Yoda's Ball Sack

    Mine is this movie is another turd in the water pipes of remakes.

  • April 30, 2010, 6:09 p.m. CST

    The Fat Boys video will be scarier than this

    by sheepshagger

    This is a film for MTV Cunts

  • April 30, 2010, 6:11 p.m. CST

    I'm sorry but no.

    by lead_sharp

    A bunch of no marks get picked off by a crispy child molester as directed by Michael 'fuck all talent' Bay's brother and produced by afore mentioned talent deficit cretin. We've seen this at least 8 times before, none of the mechanics in this (micro sleeps and repressed memories) work the way they should have been researched (five minutes with a book Bay, you nob jocky). Even accepting Haley wringing every drop of creditability from a tired and over hacked character he still boils down to a man in bad need of a pedicure and a few skin grafts killing people we don't care about in boring predictable ways. There is nothing new here but some polished effects and I really hope this kills Platinum Dune stone dead.

  • April 30, 2010, 6:48 p.m. CST

    Harry, WTF!

    by The Dark Nolan

    Between this and "The Lovely Bones." Come on dude, stop liking everything!!!

  • April 30, 2010, 7:49 p.m. CST

    I saw this today Harry.

    by Holeman

    You are wrong. You are so fucking wrong it's pathetic. This movie is a fucking travesty. I don't know why I keep trusting your reviews. How can anyone who actually claims to love the original like this piece of shit? I don't get you, man. What the fuck?

  • April 30, 2010, 10:22 p.m. CST

    jesus

    by grandlarseny

    This was an absolutely terrible movie. yeah i initially thought this remake was a really bad idea, but after haley was cast i got curious. in the last couple months, i became very excited to see this thanks to some cool looking trailers and rewatching watchmen a couple times. then i saw it. i hated every moment of this crapfest. i had no interest in any character... at all. nancy was a waste of time. i hate that freddy is a child molestor and not a killer. how the fuck do you explain the glove then? soooo, he would scratch them on the back and molest them, then be surprised when the parents found out? he's "the springwood slasher" for fucks sake! got fuck off harry. fuck right off. no self respecting freddy fan (and believe you me, i absolutely love freddy) would like this POS. go straight to hell platinum dunes. and take your corporate shill of a reviewer with you.

  • April 30, 2010, 10:53 p.m. CST

    Right on! As a diehard Freddy Fan, I couldn't rest until I wrote

    by ilikepretty

    This movie is getting the short end of the stick. It feels weird defending something I was so ready and expecting to loathe, but check it out: http://tinyurl.com/2elqdz2

  • April 30, 2010, 11:04 p.m. CST

    Harry how dare you...

    by Mr. Profit

    That movie was the wackest piece of shit sorry excuse for a Freddy movie I have EVER seen. Freddy's Dead, Freddy's Revenge and even The Dream Child were all better than this shit. It was another watered down Platinum Dunes effort that again mistakenly builds up the killer's backstory in an attempt to make them sympathetic. <P>Their best effort was TCM, and since then they have gotten progressively worse. How dare they even fuck up Freddy. If anything, this was their opportunity to do things right. Samuel Bayer needs to never direct again because his direction was horrible. Thomas Dekker and Katie Cassidy are the only two kids who attempted to act in this movie. Nancy was lame and dumbed down. And Freddy was on some stupid Jason Voorhees type shit with his killing. He was just quick and brutal and he zipped through the body count without you even getting to enjoy some good dream sequences and stalk and slash. The only way to save this shit is to remake Dream Warriors with a new team and director and kill off Nancy in the first 10 minutes of the movie. Also the burn makeup was laughable. And the final mirror attack was fucking telegraphed from a mile away. Again dude, did you even see the same film most of us did?

  • April 30, 2010, 11:26 p.m. CST

    Iron Man 2 74% at Rotten Tomatoes

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    Harry you have outdone yourself this time. The 1-2 punch, these two reviews will go down in history as the peak of your insanity. What are you smoking, pass it over here it must be some good shit!

  • April 30, 2010, 11:29 p.m. CST

    all these shit-ass remakes and they're all worse than the origin

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    fuck stop paying for this shit and they'll go away. damnit I'm guilty too, it's like a car crash on the side of the road I can't help looking.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:30 p.m. CST

    Plant!!!

    by hayt43

    ...nuff said.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:30 p.m. CST

    Nrn sounds like such a studio plant

    by D.Vader

    Sorry, but it's true.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:40 p.m. CST

    Probably catch it at discount house

    by mofraccas

    Out of curiosity, but I'm inclined to lean toward Beaks view, seeing as how, you know, he's intelligent and what not. Could have been something, with the tools afforded modern filmmakers (imagine dream sequences by a film company that gives a fuck), but instead a lazy, mercenary retread of the original. Which isn't all that great anyway. Great concept that could've been expanded on. Fuck you, Platinum Dunes.

  • April 30, 2010, 11:44 p.m. CST

    Plant... No "Stereotype Casting"? Please...

    by Mr. Profit

    Nancy was the standard and lame tortured "Goth" girl. Dean was the typical "Jock". Kris was the typical pretty blond. So gimme a break. The movie was so bland that it's hard to even believe someone found any excitement out of it. Also, the original is 26 years old. And no one asked for a "Shot for Shot" remake. But if you are going to borrow heavily from the original, then fuck it, why didn't they borrow the best parts? The CGI deaths were stupid looking. The CGI wall effect was corny. The mirror death didn't even match the mother through the door in the original. And that is sad since in the original, it's obvious a doll is being pulled through the door. <P>And the script was weak. It went through the motions until they got to Quentin and Nancy as the last two standing. <P>The mother being an alcoholic in the original created a better dynamic between her and Nancy, here she just has nothing to do. So when she SPOILER SPOILER dies in the end, you have no connection to her, so you don't care. <P>And robbing Nancy of her resourcefulness in order to make her just another victim who just so happens to stumble upon killing Freddy in the end was just lame. <P>And it was also foolish to kill off the other classmates that we didn't meet. If these bastards do make a sequel, what will Freddy's purpose in returning be if he killed all but 2 of the kids responsible for him burning? And the one liner at the end... Seriously? Also thought it was corny to re-use "How's this for a wet dream?" when it was used in part 4 in a funnier way. What a missed opportunity... This movie is just so pointless and bland that I was hoping to fall asleep and maybe dream that I was watching a more exciting movie.

  • May 1, 2010, 2:04 a.m. CST

    Rotten Tomatoes

    by Powerring

    Rt has been fairly on the ball, and a better source than any one, or two critics. In general however, I have often added between 10 and 30 points to thier score to call it more realistic. critics are not the general public. Gimme popcorn and 90 minutes to 3 hours of semi decent entertainment (or better) and that's good enough for a 60. If the movie doesn't even try or is an abysmal failure (furry vengence) than my only score is 0%. With me it's... "What is entertaining about this movie...or does it bore me?" Beyond that is too nitpickey. I have no doubt IM2 will be between 80-100% for me on the entertainment scale.

  • May 1, 2010, 3:38 a.m. CST

    Harry, you ignorant slut

    by JuanSanchez

  • May 1, 2010, 4:24 a.m. CST

    Yes!!

    by CoolHandLukeJedi

    I'm excited about fucking Freddy Krueger because I looked back and saw Kurt Russell was laughing so I guess it's okay!!! :-)

  • May 1, 2010, 5:35 a.m. CST

    Harry supporting new cycle of monster movies... FAIL

    by HELLSFOXES

    This generation deserves its own original relevant horror icons, not spewed out slick MTV revamped versions.... Seriously Harry. Lovely Bones blew, so did this... get real, PLEASE

  • May 1, 2010, 5:48 a.m. CST

    Harry loves film

    by kurgan1

    That's why it is so hard for him to ever write a bad review. It doesn't make him a sellout, although it does mean you sometimes need to take a pinch of salt.

  • May 1, 2010, 6:06 a.m. CST

    Michael Bay

    by HELLSFOXES

    We all love horror films here. We need to stop encouraging Bay from messing with a genre he HAS NO RIGHT MESSING WITH! The sooner we ignore his remakes, the sooner he'll drop the rights and they have a chance of getting picked up by a quality independent studio who can hire an awesome director... I just have a fundamental problem with Bay messing with horror. FUCK THAT

  • May 1, 2010, 7:46 a.m. CST

    ilikepretty - You're not helping the cause with that review.

    by WickedJester

    It reads like an entry into your diary. Just sayin'.

  • May 1, 2010, 8:11 a.m. CST

    Well, I saw it. Harry, I want whatever you're on.

    by Hint_of_Smegma

    I kept an open mind, I was dying for this to be a good film and a new start for the Krueger mythos. Admittedly, Haley was fantastic as Freddy, the makeup effects were excellent but he was completely and utterly let down by everything else around him - supporting cast was bland, uninteresting and stripped of any sympathy that you had for the original cast. Nancy, the PIVOTAL FUCKING ROLE was just reduced to a stereotypical naff horror movie victim. Inexcusable. That ruins the story alone and makes the film infinately less than it's original story. The effects (minus the wall effect which was done 100 times better with a bit of stretched latex ffs) were good and I really liked the phasing in and out of the dream sequence, let's face it Wes would've loved to pull that off 26 years ago if he had the tech to make it that seemless, but fuck it, overall it's not a good movie. It's not a bad movie by itself, but as a reboot to ANOES it was just bland, unscary, forgettable. Haley was fucking great and deserves another shot inthe hat and glove but they need to up their game if they get a sequel. Well, it was better than Freddy's Dead and Dream Child but that's really not saying much. Very, very, very fucking disappointed. I mean, how hard do you have to work to ruin a remake of Elm Street? Did they have some guy on set whose job it was to stand around saying "that bit is too interesting - dumb it down a bit, no, even more than that. Think BLAND people!!". Such a missed opportunity and it sucks because they sure as hell had the right Freddy for the job.

  • May 1, 2010, 9:39 a.m. CST

    Really, Harry?

    by MattFini

    What the fuck man. I went, a little more excited than I was initially - mainly because of YOUR review, and I couldn't believe how terrible this was. The way they shoehorned Freddy into EVERY nightmare sequence was lazy and failed in ever generating ANY tension or suspense. You were never waiting for Freddy to show up, you always saw him. He wasn't scary and the director, Sam Bayer, couldn't muster up any enthusiasm to make this feel like anything but a cheap cash-in.

  • May 1, 2010, 10:20 a.m. CST

    HEY HARRY : YOU SOLD OUT

    by theplant

    YOU SHOULD BE BASHING THIS PIECE OF CRAP, WHY DO YOU HATE TERMINATOR SALVATION, BUT LAP THIS CRAP ?

  • May 1, 2010, 11:11 a.m. CST

    MR. PROFIT

    by KHjLL

    I already tied up all the loose ends from the film. I'm glad they killed everyone in the class. I have the perfect concepts for sequels.

  • May 1, 2010, 11:11 a.m. CST

    Saw it last night

    by originalmemflix

    It wasn't great. I wasn't terrible, but it is in no way a "good" movie. The Crazies is more exciting. I did like the 'did he or didn't he" motivation for the character. I think Harry should never see a movie for the first time at one of those events. It's got to jade your opinions a little. And no, the man's not taking money from anyone. That makes no sense. Why would he risk a scandal that would jeopardize this site that he loves so much? He's a fanboy. He likes what he likes.

  • May 1, 2010, 11:44 a.m. CST

    NOES Sucks? Get bent GreatFuckTater

    by WickedJester

    Would love to hear what you consider a horror gem of the 80s.<br><br>Gonna say Wes Craven is a hack too?

  • May 1, 2010, 12:40 p.m. CST

    RT vindicates Harry!

    by James_Camera_On

    Sort of. It's now 15% positive, oh gosh and gollies, be still my beating heart. Breaking the percentage down: 70 hack right-wing reviewers Against vs 12 Feelm geniuses For. 4-star equivalent rating of 1.5 stars. Give it up Harry. Your credibility as a reviewer is now officially in the toilet and is being flushed . . .

  • May 1, 2010, 12:46 p.m. CST

    You have no credibility, Harry.

    by kolchak

    At no point was that movie scary. <p>Haley tries really hard, and I give him credit. Under the right circumstances with a better script and director, I could see him as Freddy. <p> But this movie failed to generate sympathy for ANY of its characters. Which is fine if you want us to root for Freddy. But since they ramped up the pedophilia angle that obviously wasn't what they were going for. <p> My screening was littered with loud laughter and absolutely no screaming. This was an utter failure.

  • I don't know if you have seen me around, but I have been here since 1996 and used to run a site that was frequently linked to by AICN. I am a die hard horror fan, and the movie was great. What were you expecting from a Freddy movie? They created their own story. They didn't use studio typecasts for characters. They created a new background for the children jumping rope, I could go on and on about what I loved about this movie compared to every Nightmare except for New Nightmare. If you go into this film expecting it to suck you will not enjoy it. I went in with the expectations that it would be a new take on Freddy, and it was a new one that I completely applaud.

  • May 1, 2010, 1:24 p.m. CST

    I might see this for free, as in not pay

    by SoylentMean

    but I'm not excited for it. Harry and hyperbole are synonymous. Grain of salt included.

  • May 1, 2010, 1:27 p.m. CST

    I liked the movie.

    by Mike_D

    thats just my opinion.

  • May 1, 2010, 1:38 p.m. CST

    He owns Freddy Nikes.

    by WickedJester

    Did you really expect a negative review after reading that far in?<br><br>Sometimes you're just happy you get to revisit a character or story, even if the movie blows. <br><br>My razorbladed fingers are crossed, but we shall see Sunday.

  • May 1, 2010, 1:52 p.m. CST

    Um, Yes violent Child molesters do deserve to burn

    by picardsucks

    Or hang, fry, shot, any form of Turkish agony you can think of would prob be appropriate

  • May 1, 2010, 2:38 p.m. CST

    Well, it bombed 15 mil for Friday.

    by RPLocke

    Did better than Lick Ass, though.

  • May 1, 2010, 2:47 p.m. CST

    The 3rd act saved the movie for me

    by JackSlater4

    I got Freddy, I got puns, and it finally strayed far enough away from the original.

  • May 1, 2010, 2:52 p.m. CST

    And the final scare was 10 times better

    by JackSlater4

    than the convertible from the original movie. One of the requirements of Nightmare movies is that you hate Nancy's mom, and they nailed that.

  • May 1, 2010, 2:53 p.m. CST

    $15,800,000 on Friday!

    by IHaveSeenEveryEpisodeOfPrisonBreak

    Bring on Part 2-2

  • May 1, 2010, 3:19 p.m. CST

    I'm sorry but...

    by Neosamurai85

    New Nightmare is overrated. There. I said it. The make-up for Freddy is some of the worst in the series, the camera work is horrid, the in-jokes make Scream look subtle and usually revolve around Wes telling us how great Wes is. The kills are neither inventive nor scary, and it's that FUCKING KID!!! Which, by the way, for a film that likes to say all the sequels suck, sure seems inspired by The Dream Child (part 5). Now, don't get me wrong, I don't hate the film, but for a movie that came out two years after Candyman, it's not really as groundbreaking in it's postmodernism as people act like it is. Still, glad to see the love for Part 2. That one's a very underrated film in the series.

  • May 1, 2010, 3:26 p.m. CST

    Jackie Earl is one overrated actor

    by RPLocke

    I'll get heat for this, but his turn in Watchmen was okay, but he was ripping off Jack Nicholson.

  • May 1, 2010, 3:28 p.m. CST

    I rewatched all the originial films and the best part was...

    by SoylentMean

    Robert Englund as Freddy. He was the only constant and he was for a reason.

  • May 1, 2010, 4:13 p.m. CST

    Does this site ever review real films anymore?

    by LostMythos

    I know this a fan geek site but Harry, did you ever consider not reviewing some obscure shitty movie or some big studio remake? I mean, fine films pass this site by everyday. You should investigate and up the ante here. You are slowly going out of style. I believe you can do it though.... hopefully

  • May 1, 2010, 4:32 p.m. CST

    The new "Nightmare" is ALMOST as bad as...

    by RosemarysBabyDaddy

    "Nightmare on Elm Street Pt. 2", which is the gayest horror movie ever made. Yes, gayer than "Interview with a Vampire". Not that there's anything wrong with that. See for yourself: http://www.stomptokyo.com/otf/nightmare2/nightmare2.htm

  • May 1, 2010, 4:33 p.m. CST

    Well the remake is a HIT so a sequel is due to come

    by ominus

    Harry just got justified.suck it haters.

  • May 1, 2010, 4:34 p.m. CST

    Hated it

    by RobFromBackEast

    A sad, soulless film that was a shitty, 00s "upgrade" of the classic Craven original. Not bringing Craven on board in some capacity was a bullshit move and the film suffered as a result. Last House and Hills are two of the best of the current crop.

  • May 1, 2010, 4:49 p.m. CST

    Wes Craven probably didn't want anything to do with it

    by JackSlater4

    after making Wes Craven's New Nightmare, which is not so much a film as it is a paper weight like Batman & Robin and Superman IV.

  • May 1, 2010, 5:13 p.m. CST

    well the good news is

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    theres no more beloved franchises left for Hollywood to shit on an rape my skull and laugh as they piss on my face. Wait they will probably fuck up the Alien prequel. I need medication the trauma is too great.

  • May 1, 2010, 5:54 p.m. CST

    The sequel should have the DREAM WARRIORS.

    by Mike_D

    I demand it

  • May 1, 2010, 6:37 p.m. CST

    harry is dead wrong about nightmare on elm street

    by RefutetheHype

    and he's excited about fucking freddy krueger!

  • May 1, 2010, 6:50 p.m. CST

    Ummm... did Harry say his mom burned to death?

    by HB_Dad

    Thats fucking terrible!

  • May 1, 2010, 7:20 p.m. CST

    TIME

    by KHjLL

    Time magazine gave it a good review.

  • May 1, 2010, 7:20 p.m. CST

    TIME

    by KHjLL

    Time magazine gave it a good review.

  • May 1, 2010, 7:21 p.m. CST

    TIME

    by KHjLL

    http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1986077,00.html

  • May 1, 2010, 8:29 p.m. CST

    How much did you get paid for this one Harry?

    by brodiebruce_405

    Nothing good NEEDS or CALLS OUT FOR or BEGS to be remade. Only money begs for those things. If money had a dick, Harry would be a flamer...

  • May 1, 2010, 10:40 p.m. CST

    This movie......

    by Number9997

    .......was not really that good. It is not the worst movie ever made, but it's clear that this remake was pointless. Harry was DEFINITELY paid off to write this review. Jackie Earle is not even in Robert Englund's league! Here is a well-constructed review for you folks. http://www.darkhorizons.com/reviews/1042/A-Nightmare-on-Elm-Street

  • May 1, 2010, 11:59 p.m. CST

    Haley was so BORING as Freddy...

    by BigTuna

    I don't really blame him so much, the script gave him nothing to do. He said "Evil" things in a deep voice and scratched his claw against things. That's it. Harry, WTF are you raving about?

  • May 2, 2010, 12:51 a.m. CST

    That Dark Horizon review...

    by RosemarysBabyDaddy

    ...was spot on, thanks for sharing that link, Number9997. I made the mistake of going to see the new "Elm St." remake today, all the time hoping that Harry was on to something. He wasn't. Longest hour and a half ever. I remember seeing the original all those years ago, and I remember actually giving a damn that those kids onscreen were falling asleep and getting slashed up, one by one. In the remake, they couldn't get hacked to death fast enough for my taste. I wanted them all dead, and FAST...mainly so I could go home and bitch about how bad the movie was for the rest of the day.

  • May 2, 2010, 1:11 a.m. CST

    well it wasn't as bad as I expected

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    the first 30 minutes were. fucking god-aweful 1st act, it was comically terrible. So inept. I don't like the new Freddy either, but I agree some of the blame should go to the script. After a while the story picked up and it got pretty creepy and started to work o.k. as a Nightmare flick.

  • May 2, 2010, 1:27 a.m. CST

    "The man has anvils of charisma. I’d relish...

    by thegreatwhatzit

    "seeing him grow his career." Marvelous prose Harry, and that "anvils" metaphor is absolutely renascent. And you attended a party (hatcheck boy, again?).

  • May 2, 2010, 2 a.m. CST

    Harry likes everything!

    by Liquid Meddle

    Seriously, what's new?

  • May 2, 2010, 2:31 a.m. CST

    Mediocre at best, total garbage at its worst.

    by Nick Michalak

    I'm sorry, but this was a BORE of a film. It was dull, lifeless, and bland. Everything in this film was done at a mediocre level. I give Jackie credit for trying, but everything and everyone else involved with the film just failed to try at all. The original film is the favorite horror film of a friend of mine, and he couldn't have been more disappointed in this remake from tp to bottom. The film has no genuine suspense, tension, or horror - it's just a compilation of jump scares (of which no talent or skill is required to do). Anyone can have someone jump out of the shadows backed by a LOUD musical stinger. It's cheap and worthless. It contributes nothing to atmosphere, and actually hurts the film and Freddy overall. These characters are more interested in discovering some truth that turns out to be false instead of trying to discover a way to defeat Freddy. He never becomes the looming figure of terror that he's supposed to be. The music was average, and the direction was blah. Platinum Dunes needs to STOP hiring music video directors for feature films! They have NO experience working with actors to craft a believable, let alone effective performance, and certainly don't know anything about telling a coherent story. They know only how to make the product LOOK good, and that's the job of a DP - not the director. Hire someone who knows who to direct the film! There's no entertainment value to be had. It's grim, unintelligible, and utterly pointless. The dialogue was blah, and the performances were blah. This film is flawed in too many ways to really specifically detail here. Simply said, it'll be forgotten rather soon, but not soon enough.

  • May 2, 2010, 3:02 a.m. CST

    "Harry gets paid to rave" allegations

    by JFC

    I don't see the value in it from a studio perspective. The crowd who frequents this site is either going to pay to see the geek-centric titles no matter what or torrent them, so I doubt the studios would go that far out of their way to make sure they're presented in a positive light. Besides, this site's approval - or lack thereof - doesn't make or break a release. Look no further for proof than the borderline-flop Kick-Ass, which had some of the most superlative pre-release celebration in the history of the site.

  • May 2, 2010, 3:59 a.m. CST

    Paid 2 Rave. If you only knew

    by TheJudger

    This place gets paid money to run banner ads for films. You are wrong in your theory. Bloody Disgustings Ad program feels like screen rape. I hate going there for horror news. I miss the days when all the news both images videos and the full text report was lathered onto one page and the visitor never needed to click on anything to read them. Dark Horizons used ot be like that and damn do I miss it. You can make money that way now. The Ad's and the Affiliate Programs are how these basement reviewers make money. The studios and cinematic creatives don't respect their opinions in truth they fear them. And so they give in- but they have found a way to do it in on a small scale. IT's not a buy out per say they grant these guys interviews and film screenings and press visits to the set. Not all the much. But hit your way back clock arm for a minute. Remember one of the critics cry for help to reach an "APPLE" contact around here, and now Harry mentions the Ipad thing in his monster inc sequel newleak. Open your eyes. The studios grease as much as they can with in a bribe budget. It's not direct money or a written check, but pretty darn close.

  • May 2, 2010, 4:01 a.m. CST

    whoops

    by TheJudger

    never needed to click on anything to read them. Dark Horizons used to be like that and damn do I miss it. You """"can't""""" make money that way now.

  • May 2, 2010, 4:21 a.m. CST

    the hype from this site doesn't seem to have much effect

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    Kick Ass is only one example of a long line of movies the geeks here cream their Magneto undies over that end up being colossal b.o. flops

  • May 2, 2010, 4:27 a.m. CST

    I'm not saying it works

    by TheJudger

    but it does help. I remember moriarty telling me how boring set visits are. Then I got to see what they were like first hand as a invited guest with near full access to the stuff being done on the day I was there. I'd say the Drew is full of shit. Maybe it might be boring if you didn't care for the subject matter of the film or the creatives involved. Set visits, motel/hotel stays, free meals and lux rides, friendly back and fourth in person over phone or through email "we like you" talks with the actors, directors and producers involved, fly outs to premieres, free screeners, letting you be the first to see or screen a final film or in progress edit, free memorabilia and film props, and photos moments with these people and autographs and banner ads they pay you to show on your site. The system knows how to feed the critics. It wont promise a positive review, but it helps to lessen the blow they might receive if the films sucks ass. I think its very hair metal and one day this trend will 86 itself. I hate how films media junkets and bts features play the psychology angle to sell the film to us. Telling us how much it explores certain ideas and character types. It's all bullshit. The studios sink millions of dollars into the ads and "why/sizzle" sell tactics to get your ticket purchase. You think the stars want to go on Jay Leno and to Press Junkets to advertise their latest film. Fuck no! But the Studios do. Stop lying to yourself and wake up. It's a large game in play here.

  • May 2, 2010, 5:16 a.m. CST

    Made-up minds

    by Joe Huber

    It seems like a lot of the haters have their mind made up before even seeing the movie. I understand not liking remakes, but a lot of people just seem to want to bash a movie for the hell of it. I HATED it when Rob Zombie remade Halloween, but then when I actually saw it for myself I ended up liking it (still nowhere near the original!)Though Zombie's Halloween 2 sucked in too many ways (and I tried having an open mind on that one)to explain. With remakes you have to go into it with an open-minded, expect to be disappointed but HOPE to be surprised with a good remake. If you don't even give the movie a chance, why bother? Comparing a remake like NOES to the original sets the remake up to fail (even if it is good otherwise) and they do a lot of the time, but Harry has a point that there are many good remakes out there as well. Carpenter's The Thing is a great example, hell the movie is better than the original. Also, I get Harry's take on this. A lot of reviewers simply don't like horror movies (try Ebert who reluctantly will give a successful movie like Halloween a good review only after many others started saying it was good). Too many critics will bash a horror movie without giving it a reasonable chance. Many movie reviewers/critics can't stand horror movies. They do the reviews because the fans demand it, but most of the time you can sense they do so very reluctantly. I understand getting burned on a bad horror flick, but I always go into movies with an open-mind and decide for myself. I guess what I'm saying is there are too many sheep out there and not enough leaders. Oh and to those of you who think Harry was bought off, that's fucking hilarious! You honestly think Dunes would toss any cash away? Hell they are so tight-assed with their money that they hire first time directors for all their films, they even admit it! That's not to say there aren't bad remakes or bad horror movies. The genre hurts itself by putting so much crap out there that gives it the rep it has, but some good horror movies get lost in the shuffle. John Carpenter's career is a great example, most of his films are cult classics that failed at the box office.

  • May 2, 2010, 5:16 a.m. CST

    Made-up minds

    by Joe Huber

    It seems like a lot of the haters have their mind made up before even seeing the movie. I understand not liking remakes, but a lot of people just seem to want to bash a movie for the hell of it. I HATED it when Rob Zombie remade Halloween, but then when I actually saw it for myself I ended up liking it (still nowhere near the original!)Though Zombie's Halloween 2 sucked in too many ways (and I tried having an open mind on that one)to explain. With remakes you have to go into it with an open-minded, expect to be disappointed but HOPE to be surprised with a good remake. If you don't even give the movie a chance, why bother? Comparing a remake like NOES to the original sets the remake up to fail (even if it is good otherwise) and they do a lot of the time, but Harry has a point that there are many good remakes out there as well. Carpenter's The Thing is a great example, hell the movie is better than the original. Also, I get Harry's take on this. A lot of reviewers simply don't like horror movies (try Ebert who reluctantly will give a successful movie like Halloween a good review only after many others started saying it was good). Too many critics will bash a horror movie without giving it a reasonable chance. Many movie reviewers/critics can't stand horror movies. They do the reviews because the fans demand it, but most of the time you can sense they do so very reluctantly. I understand getting burned on a bad horror flick, but I always go into movies with an open-mind and decide for myself. I guess what I'm saying is there are too many sheep out there and not enough leaders. Oh and to those of you who think Harry was bought off, that's fucking hilarious! You honestly think Dunes would toss any cash away? Hell they are so tight-assed with their money that they hire first time directors for all their films, they even admit it! That's not to say there aren't bad remakes or bad horror movies. The genre hurts itself by putting so much crap out there that gives it the rep it has, but some good horror movies get lost in the shuffle. John Carpenter's career is a great example, most of his films are cult classics that failed at the box office.

  • May 2, 2010, 5:21 a.m. CST

    Fuck the double posts.................

    by Joe Huber

    or did I mean Fucking Freddy Kreuger? lol sorry Harry couldn't resist!

  • May 2, 2010, 7:48 a.m. CST

    RZH2 is better than RZH1

    by TheJudger

    It's true! People are way too wrapped up in the homagefest nostal crap that bleeds itself out in RZH1 to even understand why the sequel. A film that is fully it's own take on these characters is better. PD films suck dick. and remakes can outdo the original. There was a large fucking sandbox to play in here, very few gave a fuck. I've posted way too many times in these threads. I did so because I want to stress how fucked this genre is thanks in part to fucking over an entire generation of potential filmmakers by abusing them with this remake trend. Fuck this movie and you blind horror-cultureless dumb "generation fucked" raised on remake fucks. If you walked out thinking you could have done better or they could. That in and of itself speaks volumes. The film works for some of you because you remember the whys of the original. Like why he has a glove or why he kills teens. In the remake none of this is explained. The movie is shit, and some of you are jaded or just generationally blind thanks in part to being raised in this decade of remakes.

  • May 2, 2010, 9:31 a.m. CST

    New AICN Drinking Game

    by BlaGyver

    Find an article by Harry and take a shot every time he uses the phrases "I love..." or "That said..."

  • May 2, 2010, 10:43 a.m. CST

    Just saw this movie yesterday. Harry is ON CRACK

    by PinkFloyd7

    This movie was extremely mediocre. It's the kind of movie you'll forget about 2 minutes after you leave the theater. Seriously, both "The Human Centipede" and "Survival of the Dead" are better than this, and that's not saying much.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:13 a.m. CST

    For the record....

    by Nick Michalak

    I went into the film ready to give it a fair chance to impress me. I hadn't made up my mind about it in terms of it just being bad. If I thought that, I wouldn't have wasted my money and time on it. I wasnt expecting (despite hoping for) something awesome, but at least an enjoyable, coherent film with some genuine or at least fun scares. It failed to deliver to even my lowest expectations. Considering it was from the same people who butchered the Friday The 13th remake, I knew high expectations were unreasonable. So, I just went in hoping to come out satisfied on at least a base level, but it didn't happen. I like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake, but that's about it from Platinum Dunes. I wanted to enjoy this film, and walkd into it with every intention of having a good time. The film didn't allow me that pleasure, unfortunately.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Okay, it's good. But is it SUPERMAN RETURNS good???

    by BobWinters5

    I gotta know.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:21 a.m. CST

    THE JUDGER

    by KHjLL

    You suck at judging films and people perceptions. Hollywood has been remaking films since it's incarnation. The same can be said about BOOKS to film DRACULA has been remade since the beginning of film. Some of the best films in hollywood are remakes. All the HATERS on here are mostly douche bags. You guys talk shit about the guy who created this site and here you are posting on the board he created for you to do just that. Rip on the movie but don't be a douche bag and rip on the guy who created this board for us.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:29 a.m. CST

    I came out of the film...

    by KHjLL

    thinking of all the endless possibilities they can take the franchise now. I always wanted to write a story for the franchise between 5 and FREDDY'S DEAD to tie up all the loose ends. Now the possibilities are endless. If anyone on heres going to hate me cuz I fucking love A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET all of them and the same for FRIDAY THE 13th , HALLOWEEN, A TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE then I really don't give to fucks what you think about this film or any remake.... Yesterday and friday couldn't have been better it all ended with the CAVS red playing the CELTIC GREEN. < and thats a reference to my JASON screenplay if you are wondering what the FUCK.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:32 a.m. CST

    I retro spect...

    by KHjLL

    I love it when films are remade... You go back to the original and maybe rewatch the whole franchise it's like the FOUNTAIN of youth. You start to remember things from your childhood where you were and who you were when digging into your libary each film being another story from your past.

  • May 2, 2010, 12:45 p.m. CST

    Harry is it as good as Serpico?

    by picardsucks

    Are we talking Oscar here or only Bafta?

  • May 2, 2010, 1:38 p.m. CST

    I actually agree with Harry

    by disfigurehead

    I loved it. In no way is it perfect but I still loved it.

  • May 2, 2010, 2:29 p.m. CST

    Well, the masses loved it.

    by RPLocke

    Now we'll get at least 2 more, thanks fuckers.

  • May 2, 2010, 2:43 p.m. CST

    KHjLL is starting to sound a little crazy

    by D.Vader

    And eccentric. Or very young perhaps. I dunno, something just seems off.

  • May 2, 2010, 3:01 p.m. CST

    32 mil folks, thanks USA and Harry

    by barnaby jones

    We'll be seeing crappy remakes for the forseeable future.

  • May 2, 2010, 3:35 p.m. CST

    D. VADER

    by KHjLL

    Explain... Eccentric and crazy because I think people who trash a person because of his opinion on the board he created are douche bags. Please. If you don't like a film write that you don't like it. But to hate on someone because of their opinion is a douche bag. Who all happen to be posting on his board.

  • May 2, 2010, 3:41 p.m. CST

    D. VADER

    by KHjLL

    Don't get me wrong I am a little crazy. Some one held a gun to my head in St. Cloud once and I told them to pull the trigger when I looked them in the eyes. I hope you can slam me more then words like Young, crazy, and eccentric = I am odd and I am me but I never slam a person because of their opinion that's childish and pathetic...

  • May 2, 2010, 3:44 p.m. CST

    Wow. RottenTomatoes has this at 14%...

    by GeorgieBoy

    How much are they paying you for this positive review?!?

  • May 2, 2010, 3:54 p.m. CST

    Harry is Living the Dream

    by hayt43

    Of being a bloated fat Media Whore.

  • May 2, 2010, 5:17 p.m. CST

    Liked it--but Freddy TALKED WAY TOO MUCH!

    by dead youngling

    also didn't like the way they showed him so clearly all the time. but overall I thought the kids were fine and movie was good. This coming from a lifelong 35 old Freddy fan.

  • May 2, 2010, 5:37 p.m. CST

    its official.the sequel is confirmed and it will be 3D.

    by ominus

    http://bit.ly/ajM06X

  • May 2, 2010, 5:42 p.m. CST

    This is going to sound racially insensitive, but...

    by Biggie Kaiju

    I saw it last night in Philly. Packed house, and me the only white guy there. I COULD HEAR THE ENTIRE MOVIE. I can think of no more succinct way of putting how crappy this version was. Haley reminded you of Peter Lorre in "M?" Jesus, Harry. You haven't reached that much since you said you liked Butler Exposition from "Spider-Man 3" because it reminded you of old movies from the 40's (or whatever you were babbling about). Stick to getting the movie scoops and leave the reviews to others. You're so in love with every geek franchise that you've given a pass to some big-time stinkers.

  • May 2, 2010, 7:44 p.m. CST

    Ooh is me.

    by benson111

    Weak. Uninteresting. And down right turd inducing. No eyeball fucking. Further proof that Hollywood has lost its imagination.

  • May 2, 2010, 8:07 p.m. CST

    RE: barnaby jones

    by VitaminZ

    We were doomed to endless remakes anyway. I don't think the success or failure of the new Elm Street really matters. Hollywood isn't exactly brimming with new ideas. I also think ANOES is exactly the type of movie they should remake. The originals don't really hold up here in 2010. Freddy Krueger is a great concept/villain but the old movies seem a little cheesy and silly. A "re-imagining" could have been incredible. I hope they try again and get it right.

  • May 2, 2010, 8:29 p.m. CST

    Loved the original but this movie is awful....

    by jaysin420

    and Jackie is a great actor but they totally wasted him. It's just extremely boring in every way, it was exactly like the latest Friday the 13th movie (which sucked but not as bad as this shitfest).

  • May 2, 2010, 9:05 p.m. CST

    "I hope they try again and get it right."

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

  • May 2, 2010, 9:10 p.m. CST

    YA ME TOO

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    Part 2 in 3d? OH that COULD BE COOL! MAYBE THEY WONT FUCK IT UP AGAIN! BUT THEY ARE FUCKING HACKS AND IM IN DENIAL. THE TRAUMA IS TOO GREAT TO ADMIT THE TRUTH. THE TRUTH IS THOSE FUCKIN HACKS ARE GIVEN A PERFECT MOVIE VILLAIN AND ARE SO FUCKIN INCOMPETENT THEY CANT EVEN MAKE A 1/2 WAY DECENT MOVIE OUT OF IT . HOW FUCKING HARD CAN IT BE> WITH TODAYS SPECIAL EFFECTS AND 3D YOU COULD MAKE A BAD ASS FREDDY FILM BUT ITS GONNA BE FRIED SHIT ON A STICK

  • May 2, 2010, 9:21 p.m. CST

    HOLLYWOOD:

    by frank cotton

    while frank won't sell out for cash, he would gladly do so for film props! seriously, get in touch, we can work something out...

  • May 2, 2010, 9:52 p.m. CST

    Rotten Community 60% not bad

    by KHjLL

  • May 2, 2010, 11:44 p.m. CST

    well the movie sucks so bad

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    the talkback died. pity.

  • May 2, 2010, 11:45 p.m. CST

    wes craven sold the rights, didn't he?

    by Larry Sellers

    That's why he had nothing to do with it? He mentioned it in that interview they posted here last year.<p> Harry isn't paid to say shit btw. He just started typing while he was still high off nostalgia. Harry's more focused reviews are always good to read. Shit like this is what makes some call his credibility into question. I mean I really doubt that he's paid to gush over movies because given his genuine enthusiasm about things many of us just don't care to take seriously...it just makes perfect sense for reviews like this to be sincere.

  • May 3, 2010, 1:16 a.m. CST

    15% on rottentomatoes...LOL at Harry

    by SlimButNotreally

    I wish I could come to this site and get good advice on movies to see, but Harry likes anything that comes out that has visual effects in it, so it's impossible to know.

  • May 3, 2010, 4:38 a.m. CST

    well. at least his recommendations

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    on more obscure films are often like finding hidden gems.

  • May 3, 2010, 8 a.m. CST

    Re: KHjLL

    by koie

    60% community rating on Rotten Tomatoes is actually not very good bad.

  • May 3, 2010, 12:04 p.m. CST

    Has the sequel bee greenlit yet?

    by AndoSoundsLikeAMong

    This destroyed Furry Vengenence over the weekend, so it looks like the way is clear!

  • May 3, 2010, 12:32 p.m. CST

    32 million??? Is that good?

    by Samuel Fulmer

    I'm guessing the actual production cost was somewhere in the 30 million range, but we all know it's going to take a huge nosedive next weekend, plus as much as it was advertised, I'm guessing the P and A budget was high.

  • May 3, 2010, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Bad on almost every level

    by Adelai Niska

    Freddy- talked too much, non-scary voice, nothing menacing except for his pervy attraction to kids, and his face was both poorly designed and way too visible. <p> PLot- complete butching of Nancy, the single greatest final girl of all time. Now she's a weak little loser who only pulls Freddy out of the dream because her boyfriend saved her. <p> Acting- hit and miss. Dekker was great, the parents did what they could, the girls were really bad. Katie Cassidy was especially terrible. <p> Worst of all, this is an R rated horror with sero nudity and not a single good kill. <p> Overall a 2/10.

  • May 3, 2010, 2:25 p.m. CST

    Won't see it, but....

    by drewlicious

    From what I can tell in the previews I like the idea of Freddy being a whiny little coward when he's alive, and then a vengeful monster when he's dead if only to show that people like Freddy Krueger are pretty brave until the tables are turned. I'm aware of how this one ends and it's too bad he doesn't end up begging for his life when he's cornered. Thats why I liked "Death Proof" when I saw it. Stunt Man Mike was a badass until the girls started fighting back, then he was a crying little bitch. I can never picture Robert Englund's Freddy doing that because as far as I can tell that version was always a monster, killing him in the first place just set him free.

  • May 3, 2010, 3:44 p.m. CST

    Horrible Freddy Movie

    by bubba_hotep

    This movie was so bad that I had trouble staying awake. I absolutely hate the way that music video directors try to give us glimpses of things, such as Freddy's face in the most horrific scenes, instead of letting us sit and squirm with displeasure. There were only two scenes that really worked for me, but the rest was cliched and unoriginal (I know it is a remake, but that doesn't mean we have to see the same CGI crap that is used in so many other films i.e. see the final scene). I HATED this movie and fear that Harry was poked by one of the studio execs to promote this thing. Go see something else! I really hope that no sequel is made. VIVA ROBERT ENGLUND!!! He will ALWAYS be the only Freddy for me.

  • May 3, 2010, 4:15 p.m. CST

    Harry's credibility...

    by Underdogthe3rd

    ... Bye Bye.

  • May 3, 2010, 9:33 p.m. CST

    I loved it.

    by bueno_bob

    Of course, I left my preconceived notions and pretentions at the door and just took it in with an open mind. I disagree with virtually every complaint anybody's listed here. Frankly, I thought it was very well done and I will unapologetically say that this is the best Nightmare film I've seen since Dream Warriors. I've been a fan of the series ever since 1984 when I saw the original and had a really, really bad vibe this was going to suck on all levels. Bottom line? It doesn't, and I don't give two shits who thinks it does. I plan on seeing it in the theater at least three more times before it's run is out, and am ecstatic that they've greenlit the sequel and plan to franchise it. Only real gripe I had about the movie was that the score could have been more electronic (as was the original) and Nancy could have been a bit more proactive rather than reactive, but I'd make it a safe guess that they'll have her work into her proactive identity by the sequel's finale.

  • May 3, 2010, 11:31 p.m. CST

    TARSEM FOR NIGHTMARE SEQUEL!!!

    by HELLSFOXES

    wouldn't that be amazing... just think what he would do for surreal nightmarish dream sequences.... p.s the dream scenes work so fucking lazy in this remake... OOOOH GREEN FILTER LIGHTING lame

  • May 4, 2010, 1:30 a.m. CST

    I disagree, the movie was ok. This man wasn't Freddy at all.

    by The Founder

    If it was anything other then a remake of Nightnmare on Elm St I'd say it was a decent enough horror flick, but sadly this was not Freddy. Freddy is known for his comedic one liners and viciousness as well, but this reimagined Freddy was boring. The acting was good from Haley but it seemed to his take on the chracter. Freddy has been set up both comedic and deadly at the same time. The movie didn't do it for me.

  • May 4, 2010, 9:29 a.m. CST

    Complete rubbish

    by Abominable Snowcone

    Just like the retreads of Halloween and F13, this is a dimly-lit rehash with a gaggle of Dawson Creek kids waiting to die. All the beats from Craven's original are hit again, only badly. LIke when Freddie comes out of the wall above the bed, the CGI looks like shit here. Haley was fine, but everything else was pretty weak. Most of the movie is devoted to the teens wandering around in their own nightmares, wondering WTF. The director substitutes quick cuts and sudden noises for "scare." This is anything but creepy and "effin awesome." It represents everything wrong with modern horror as a genre.

  • May 4, 2010, 10:19 a.m. CST

    It wasn't any worse than any of the sequels

    by RETURN_of_FETT

    I don't get what people are bitching about. It's a NOES movie. Not the best, not the worst. I agree it's weird that Freddy is a child rapist now, but I think that was always the implication, just never overtly stated. How many purely child murderers have you heard of?</p><p>I'm just saying, it's not like this series is Orson fucking Wells or something. Nightmare 4 is practically unwatchable it's so stupid and cheesy. We're talking about a series that features a fucking Nintendo Power Glove and Freddy's blades cutting through the sand to a Jaws theme! And I hate to break it to you but this series has NEVER EVER been scary! Sure the first was a little creepy in spots, but then you had goofy shit like 20 foot long arms and the monster suffering through Home Alone booby trap gags!And Wes stole that from his previous fim Last House on the Left by the way, and repeated it again in The People Under the Stairs. Dude has a serious booby trap fetish! Plus, how retarded is it that you can pull him out of your dream in the first place? That's just stupid.</p><p>Seriously, it's not as good as you remember.

  • May 4, 2010, 10:56 a.m. CST

    Harry, Harry, Harry...

    by topfivevideo

  • May 4, 2010, 11:03 a.m. CST

    Harry

    by topfivevideo

    How it goin'? Good, same here. Unfortunately I can't pick apart your "review" because I haven't seen the movie. I haven't seen the movie because, to put it simply, EVERY MOTHER-FUCKER ON THE PLANET HATED IT BUT YOU!!!. Seriously Harry, you can't post a "review" or whatever the fuck you call what you do and then blast people for disagreeing with you. And you most certainly can't call out every fucking reviewer under the sun and say "fuck you, im right and you're wrong!" I agree with Moriarty. Every fucking one of the films just got gradually worse and worse as the series went on. The first one was fresh and original but the others sucked giant monkey balls. Dude, you have never been more wrong about anything... ever.

  • May 4, 2010, 5:06 p.m. CST

    Oh Harry.....

    by bobuk12

    I'm new on the message board, but have been an AICN for years. I honestly think Harry simply watches movies on the most basic level. He doesn't go into specific plot points he had issues with (except Terminator Salvation, T2) most of the time. With that said, I can't figure out what he LIKED about this steaming pile of crap....I can usually find some agreements with Harry after seeing something he reviews, but this one leaves me baffled

  • May 5, 2010, 1:08 a.m. CST

    This movie is horrible and I now know Harry isnt a Freddy fan

    by AwkwardAvenue

    If he likes this HORSESHIT that makes Freddy lame as possible. Give me every other elm st. flick over this.

  • May 5, 2010, 1:58 a.m. CST

    Dude, you just like shit.

    by chrismata

    You shouldn't get gifts from production companies anymore. They are the lobbyists and you are the government. They buy your seal of approval. I have no faith in your reviews.

  • May 5, 2010, 6:14 a.m. CST

    Harry is excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER

    by DarthMango

    no extra words needed here..

  • May 5, 2010, 6:16 a.m. CST

    o i see

    by DarthMango

    it's been pointed out allready

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  • May 5, 2010, 2:33 p.m. CST

    Effin' awesome???

    by big_log

    This site has officially jumped the shark. Commencing defection to HitFix in 3... 2... 1...

  • May 5, 2010, 4:33 p.m. CST

    Okay, let's see....

    by Miss 45

    26 years from now....will horror movie fans be watching the original NOES as a classic. Or will this steaming pile be the new standard.

  • May 5, 2010, 4:34 p.m. CST

    Okay that was a easy question

    by Miss 45

    No one will remember this remake in 5 months, let alone 26 years. The original? Oh yeah, still will be a classic.

  • May 5, 2010, 7:43 p.m. CST

    where is Harry getting this?

    by maverick2484

    Just saw it, I'm no hater, definitely found myself pleasantly creeped out at times and was generally entertained by it. But I don't get where Harry is getting some of these ideas that seem to have made him so reverential towards this competently made movie. You seriously think that the filmmakers intended for us to wrestle with the "moral dilemma" of killing a pedophile by housefire? In the age of Saw, Hostel, and The Human Centipede you think most audiences find this to be some sort of audacious fate that even the worst of the worst (i.e. a pedophile) wouldn't deserve to suffer? "Oh, but he was only the gardener", blubbers Harry. Yes, the gardener WHO MOLESTS KIDS. (Spoiler) There was no ambiguity at all, he did it. They teased the ambiguity, then relented and said "who are we kidding, this character is pure evil." I don't think this change to Freddy added any particular moral dimension to the movie at all. What it did was add another layer of nastiness to Freddy: it's not enough that he hurt these kids in life, he has to come back for more after death. Rather than take revenge on the parents who actually killed him, he comes back for another crack at the kids. That's some creepy stuff right there, and definitely a worthwhile twist on the character, but seriously Harry, Peter Lorre? Enjoy this movie for what it is: a perfectly acceptable fulfillment of an unnecessary objective, and nothing more. Of course, I'm just happy to have a new Freddy movie, so I'll be back for the next new Freddy movie. A great character in a mediocre movie is still a great character.

  • May 6, 2010, 4:58 a.m. CST

    Harry said these words when talking about Jar Jar

    by Sgtcrispytoast

    In his TPM review "Mesa luved him!" can you really trust him after that?

  • May 6, 2010, 8:32 a.m. CST

    " I’m excited about fucking FREDDY KRUEGER"

    by Clean_Vageena

    Please get therapy Harry.

  • May 6, 2010, 2:33 p.m. CST

    Haley DID have some one-liners

    by Abominable Snowcone

    They simply weren't that funny, given that the rest of the movie is decidedly darker for the new younger crowd raised on SAW, etc. He said shit like, "YOu shouldn't fall asleep in class," "I haven't even cut you yet," and repeating the original "I'm your boyfriend now." And a couple more. They just weren't very funny. I thought Haley was good, but disliked the remake overall and thought it was unnecessary.

  • May 6, 2010, 4:01 p.m. CST

    This remake's BIGGEST FLAW was...

    by moviemo

    not being VISUALLY stimulating. For a movie about NIGHTMARES for goddam's sake, where the FUCK were the twisted, warped visuals? I'm not expecting The Cell or something so artsy-farsty that I lose the story, but COME ON. The same old running around in a broke-down factory gets old. If you think about how the original filmmakers made Freddy haunt his victims, Freddy was damn creative in coming up with ways to trick his victims into thinking they were still awake, then flipping reality abrasively on its head.

  • May 6, 2010, 9:53 p.m. CST

    MOVIEMO

    by KHjLL

    I came up with my NIGHTMARE today 75% written I figured out begining middle and end today setting wall forms.

  • May 7, 2010, 1:17 a.m. CST

    Get some rest

    by carraway

    I was dragged to see this and well..Get some rest my freind. And don't be afraid of the men in the white coats thay're there to help you.

  • May 7, 2010, 6:01 a.m. CST

    moviemo you are asking for creativity from Hollywood?

    by WINONA_RYDERS_PUSSY_JUICE

    theyd much rather copy the special effects from 1980 whenever the fuck this old ass movie came out. the only good kill scene was copied exactly from the first. they couldn't come up with anything original with a spark of genius. it all sucked

  • May 7, 2010, 5:31 p.m. CST

    Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus had more...

    by Kremzeek

    Weird ass dream stuff than this. Granted, it's obviously a completely different genre, but the point is dreams/imagination, etc *can* be made into something truly bizarre and creative, and dare I say it - something unique in modern cinema. The tools exist to make something like this for Nightmare, but ... it's Bay and Co. So, uh yeah...

  • May 7, 2010, 6:15 p.m. CST

    Dark Horizons review

    by Kremzeek

    See, now *that* was a review. And I'm not talking about the writer's opinion or whether I agree with it or not. That's irrelevant. What's relevant is the DH review uses proper grammar, doesn't spoil plot points (something nearly every critic does these days and it drives me crazy!), and isn't overly emotional (granted, SOME emotion is welcome, of course - films are called a "passion" for a reason)... But there aren't gobs of fluff and other nonsensical things to sift thru for valid info. It's a real review. I hate to say it - truthfully, I really dig this site - but some of the AICN reviewers (esp. Harry - sorry my friend) REALLY need to go back to school. And I say that as constructive critiscm. I think it could really improve this site by leaps and bounds - and you'd probably get a lot better TB's from it. Even if people disagree with you, Harry, they'd at least be able to fathom your PoV. My 2 cents (although it's probably only worth half that).

  • May 8, 2010, 1:06 a.m. CST

    HEADGEEK

    by Wookie_1995

    you....fail....as a reviewer, this was a piece of shit

  • May 8, 2010, 4:22 a.m. CST

    I keep ....

    by carraway

    I keep coming back to this hoping you've printed some kind of retraction for you glowing review of a truly shitty, I mean really really shitty movie. Make something up! Tell us someone slipped you some acid before you walked into this movie. Seriously you've lost any credibility much less any stature to "correct" someone like Roger Ebert as Your Moms Box aptly pointed out. How about just a plain ole, "Just kidding guys." When I saw that you were going to review this film I was expecting another Harry Knowles classic along the lines of your reviews of "The Love Guru" or "Journey to the Center of the Earth." I guess what I'm trying to say is that if someone is palming you a few bucks from the Movie Studio it ain't worth it man.

  • May 8, 2010, 11:26 a.m. CST

    This movie was a failure. *spoilers*

    by Baked

    During

  • May 8, 2010, 2:06 p.m. CST

    *Spoilers*

    by Baked

    In Prescreening I pointed out that the molester mystery subplot picked up too late and didn't have any emotional impact because it turned out to be a red herring. In the release screening, they seemed to have made it even LESS a part of the movie which made the whole effort seem stupid. They FAILED because they had an opportunity to make Freddy Krueger a tragic sociopath, turning on the one thing in the world he cared about because of betrayal, which would have been TEN times creepier and have given us a badguy to cheer about (like poor little Jason Voorhees).

  • May 8, 2010, 2:06 p.m. CST

    BTW

    by Baked

    Apparently the mystery was much larger in the original script but they pretty much gutted it and barely mentioned it, according to an interview I read with the producers.

  • May 9, 2010, 5:27 a.m. CST

    Platinum Dunes haven't made one decent film

    by MontyPigeon

    Why blame Harry for his gushing review when you were stupid enough to believe that this was going to be good?<p>Anything to do with Platinum Dunes is a trainwreck and always will be.

  • May 9, 2010, 7:48 p.m. CST

    Seriously...

    by SunTzu77

    I love Haley... but this remake blew beyond belief. I'm glad my buddy paid the admission. I loved the original because for many reasons...Jacques Haitkin hit the ball on the head and Wes Craven was in top form. I loved how Freddy was an enigma in Craven's version... only Nancy's mother gives a tad of back story to the character. I loved how Craven and Haitkin blurred the line between reality with dreaming. The original still holds up. This remake lacked every aspect of the original.

  • May 10, 2010, 12:16 p.m. CST

    "Effin awful & crappy as all fuck"

    by Powerring

    might be a more apt description.

  • May 15, 2010, 3:34 a.m. CST

    Great for Horror

    by MoreHorror

    No matter how everyone feels about remakes, there is no denying the impact and continual reach of horror films. That's a good thing.

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  • May 20, 2010, 10:20 p.m. CST

    i agree with harry

    by br_m2008

    it was pretty decent. jackie earl was good as freddy.. and the plot did suport the gore/blood.. jackie was good as freddy and not to take away from robert englund as freddy ofcourse. cheers mate!!

  • May 20, 2010, 10:28 p.m. CST

    reply: disfigurehead

    by br_m2008

    i agree mate. it was pretty cool. save for some dialling down on the cg fx and sue real fx though but pretty decent.

  • May 20, 2010, 10:29 p.m. CST

    harry, married?

    by br_m2008

    harry as a wife?

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  • May 26, 2010, 11:22 p.m. CST

    turns out Harry was right.

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  • June 1, 2010, 12:51 p.m. CST

    And I say....

    by Mathom

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  • June 3, 2010, 6:09 a.m. CST

    gotta side with Harry on this one...

    by MariusXe

    saw it yesterday. really really liked it. I think they shouldn't have copied some shot from the original, because when they did they failed. everything original about the movie was great and I really loved haley as freddy. After that I really don't miss englund anymore. The other problem was they didn't gave Freddy much to do here. He only stands around and scratches stuff most of the time and I wished the kill scenes were more surreal and over the top nd not only "freddy slashes guy in the chest". but, OH BOY, did the last kill knock me down. really loved that one and wished I had seen more than that. all in all, really good nightmare movie and my third favorite of the series.

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  • June 8, 2010, 5:16 p.m. CST

    Ok, so I'm late to the game here, but...

    by Kremzeek

    I just saw all the Nightmares (well, 1-5 & WCNN and 6 is on the way) for the first time in my life. I'm 34 so I was there when Freddy was all the rage. I even dressed up like him for Halloween when I was about 11 not knowing anything other than what the trailers showed or what my friends said. I mention this background so you get where I'm coming from in relation to these films and know that I never saw them in their heyday. So, having only seen them in the modern days of CG and "super-cool-awesome-blow-up-the-screen-effects", one might think I'd watch them and laugh. Well, one would be wrong. Even having never seen them until now, I can say without a doubt that the PD remake looks like shit. If they were going to replace Englund, I think Haley was a great choice, but wow... Harry, really? I mean, honestly, I'll Netflix it so I can say I've seen them all, but I'm not really looking forward to it. Don't get me wrong, Nightmares 2, 4, and 5 were pretty much crap, but there's something missing from the PD version - even in the trailers. There's some kind of element, some kind of detail or vibe, that's just not right. And it's been the same with the other PD remakes as well. Whoever they've got on the crews of these films, just isn't watching the same movies we are - there's some concept they just can't grasp. I feel for all the hardcore Nightmare fans out there. It's like when Bay shit on my beloved TFs (funny this is also Bay... hmm...). I absolutely understand your pain. Maybe I'll disagree after seeing the new one, but it's giving me that "wowie, this is going to be bad" vibe and that's rarely, if ever, been wrong.

  • June 12, 2010, 3:47 p.m. CST

    WHY IT SUCKED...

    by moviemo

    Freddy Krueger goes into your NIGHTMARES and 1) scares the shit out of you, and 2) kills you in your dreams.... Granted, the film started off with a decent promise of being visually interesting, the majority of the movie SERIOUSLY LACKS AWESOME VISUALS. How can you make a movie about murderous nightmares (DREAMS ARE VISUALLY STIMULATING, PEOPLE) and NOT include at least half a dozen mind-trippy things we've never seen before? This movie to me was as plain as any other remake, and the fact that people actually enjoyed this type of shit makes me think that our culture is magnetized toward celebrating mediocrity.

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  • June 18, 2010, 3:02 p.m. CST

    Alright, Harry

    by Kremzeek

    I'm literally watching a copy of it right now (and I truthfully have never done that before because I think it contributes to the diminishing of the movie industry, but I think it's worse to give money to Platinum Dunes or Bay). I'll say this much: so far, it's not horrible. But we'll see how it goes. I really dig Haley, but his rehash of the Rorschach voice is really distracting and pulls me out of the movie - kinda like when Mike Myers keeps recycling his Scottish "So I Married An Axe Murderer" voice. Also, they really needed to drop the eyeliner and shit on the guy who plays the blonde chick's ex-boyfriend (yes, I've already forgotten all the character's names except Nancy... it's that memorable - Are they the same as the orig. cast? Nevermind, I don't care). I've no problem with "goth" (hell, I was kind of a goth kid back in high school), but this EMO shit has got to stop. Nobody can relate to it. Not me in my 30s, not my son or his friends who are on the verge of being teenagers (this movie's demographic I would think), and certainly not people older than I am. Nobody. There's a reason there weren't any gothy/emo kids in the original Nightmare - because it's not something most audiences can relate to. So, that's really fucking annoying me. But other than that, I'll admit it's not too bad yet. I'm only about 20 mins in though. Oh, and I finally saw Nightmare 6... wow, it was terrible. So this can't be worse, I don't think...

  • June 18, 2010, 7:07 p.m. CST

    Alright so -

    by Kremzeek

    Not that anyone really cares what my opinion is, but I gotta say the "new" Elm St. wasn't all that awful. It was definitely better than orig. Nightmares 2 and 4-6. Those movies were god-awful. So, I'll admit my "this is gonna suck" radar was a little off this time - but only slightly. It's definitely not the "awesome" movie Harry describes, but it did have some merit. The ending, for example, where Fred attacks Nancy's mom - that was much, much, much improved over the ending of the original. And not just because of the effects update - it was just way, way cooler to me. The actress playing Nancy is pretty good and she's sexier than Heather Langenkamp... but a cutie in the main role really isn't a reason to like or dislike a film, so moving on... Haley was great in his performance, though I really think he could've tried a better voice. There were a couple cool nightmare moments (like when the birds fly out of the tree when Quentin is looking up insomnia on the laptop). But that's really about it. The rest, well... The burn victim makeup was a great idea in theory, but I have to agree with some people when they say he looks like "down syndrome Freddy". There's something not quite right around the eyes. And that may very well be realistic, but I don't think it works on film. All the characters were forgettable with the exception of Nancy. I guess that's how it's supposed to be? My biggest gripe, though, is it wasn't scary. At all. Now, as I said in my above posts, I didn't see the Elm St. movies as a kid (when they originally were released). Why? Because "scary" movies absolutely terrified me. I wouldn't watch anything. And I'd say that old fear is still lingering around in my adulthood, even if it's on a very subdued level. So my point is, if anyone was going to be a big pussy and be scared by this it should've been me... Uh, no. That's my main problem. It was a scary flick that wasn't scary. Stuff just kinda happened. I suppose the story was decently told (something I did not expect from Dunes), but really over all... it's just another forgettable movie. Too damn many of those these days. Very sad. Alright, well thanks for the review Harry. Even if I don't agree, at the very least you were the springboard for me to finally see all the Nightmare flicks. And I must say I enjoyed some of them and am glad I got a chance to see them all. Peace frog.

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