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Capone fulfills your deepest wish and reviews today's DVD release of NEW MOON!!!

Hey, everyone. Capone in Chicago here, eagerly awaiting the Wrath of the Talkbackers. When I returned from Austin over the weekend, I found a mailbox full of all sorts of goodies in the form of a HOT TUB TIME MACHINE backpack, a downright ornate box set of the new White Stripes documentary, and about a dozen or so screeners and review copies of DVDs, most of which were for films I'd seen already. One of the films in my bursting-at-the-seams mailbox was the two-disc NEW MOON DVD, and strangely enough, I couldn't quite get the idea out of my head of watching at least the special features on it just to see what was passing for "special" these days on a TWILIGHT SAGA DVD offering. The main feature that will probably have TWILIGHT fans buzzing is the hour-plus-long, six-part documentary about the making of NEW MOON. Other than a couple of music videos and a commentary track from director Chris Weitz and editor Peter Lambert, the set is pretty light on the extras, so the doc is pretty much it. But as I started pouring through it, I actually had the itch to watch NEW MOON again before getting too deep into the Making Of. I remember pretty much loathing from top to bottom TWILIGHT, but NEW MOON at least had some elements that kept me entertained, particularly the segments set in Italy among the Vulturi, which includes some particularly juicy performances by Michael Sheen and Dakota Fanning. So as I soared through my second viewing of NEW MOON, I was reminded just how tediously written the love triangle aspects are and how much fun the Vulturi sequences can get. My original review holds, but watching the film again at least prepared me (I thought) for the Making Of doc…or so I thought. Rightfully so, the documentary begins with the actors' reaction to the fan frenzy over TWILIGHT at events such as Comic-Con 2008. I was at this ground-zero event, and even got to interview a clearly shell-shocked Kristen Stewart and giddy director, Catherine Hardwicke. I also covered the Comic-Con 2009 events surrounding NEW MOON, although, not surprisingly, the interview opportunities were less available. I only asked to speak to Weitz and was politely turned down. I have to applaud the editor of the doc for actually bringing to life Stewart and Robert Pattinson, who rarely have anything coherent to say during interviews about these films. Perhaps the strangest aspect to the documentary is that Dakota Fanning is nowhere to be found either in the interview segments or any behind the scenes footage, which isn't such a big deal except that every other actor from the Vulturi portion of NEW MOON is so obviously present that her absence is practically broadcast from the highest rooftop. There are a few insights into Weitz’s process, including an interesting story about letters he slipped under each cast member’s door just before shooting started that provided a detailed explanation of how the film shoot would be run and how excited he was about working of the project. Again, for reasons that are kept deliberately secret, the exact contents of Weitz’s letter are kept from us. I can’t imagine what was in these documents that would get him in so much troubled if revealed, but I’ll take his work for it. But the situation begs the question, why bring it up at all? The rest of the documentary is fairly standard stuff: costume details, selecting shooting locations, stunt work, and reason after reason of why NEW MOON is “amazing” and taking it to the next level and how awesome Weitz is to work with, and how this gathering of talent is like a family. I’m sorry, but if you’re given more than an hour to tell your behind-the-scenes story, don’t waste people’s time with typical EPK garbage. Talk about logistical problems (there are little bits about the Pacific Northwest rain issue, but I bet there were more issues), show us how a particularly complicated sequence was put together, give those of us who actually know a little something about how is film is made something to grasp onto. The makers of the NEW MOON DVD set have a lot to answer for in justifying making this release a two-disc set. I have a hard time believing they couldn’t have put all of this onto one disc. That being said, a more complete and probing documentary would have gone a long way to justify the second disc. No, I didn’t expect to get such a product, but a guy can dream, can’t he? I’ll say it again: NEW MOON is a better film than TWILIGHT, immensely so. But this DVD release doesn’t reflect the things about the second film that are improvements. No, I’m not surprised; this series seems intent on disappointing, and that’s fine. Whether or not this day turns into a good one or bad one isn’t dependent on the quality of a TWILIGHT-brand product. I consider this my latest infrequent attempt to dip my toe in the pool of a certain arena of youth culture and remind myself that it’s full of acid and shit.
-- Capone Follow Me On Twitter

Readers Talkback
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  • March 23, 2010, 11:53 a.m. CST

    First, bitches

    by Fah-Cue

    Deal wit it.

  • March 23, 2010, 11:54 a.m. CST

    Sparkly skinned Emo vampires.

    by Grando

    Can suck it along with forlorn bare chested werewolves. Worst genre franchise ever, and I'm counting the Underworld films.

  • March 23, 2010, 11:55 a.m. CST

    Now that I've got that out of the way...

    by Fah-Cue

    Anyone enjoys these movies should be sent into the sun in a rocketship with no oxygen or toilet paper.

  • March 23, 2010, 11:58 a.m. CST

    Is there any NEW way . . .

    by Nice Marmot

    . . . for a bazillion tools to express their disdatin for this series?

  • March 23, 2010, 11:58 a.m. CST

    Twilight = One-dimensional waste of time

    by Denty420

    ... and the only thing you need to be a fan is a vagina.

  • March 23, 2010, 11:59 a.m. CST

    Fah-Cue...cute name

    by Whitemouse

    This is a film for the pre teen audience, for crying out loud, my parents hated Back To The Future and still do, but I was a kid and I watched and think it's one of the best films ever. New Moon and Twilight are something I can't get into (and honestly, I've only watched the trailers) but I'm sure for the audience it's for it's a great film

  • March 23, 2010, 11:59 a.m. CST

    the commentary is funny

    by Bouncy X

    i read another review that mentions the commentary with the director. apparently he actually tries to claim that the whole shirtless werwolve boys thing has a logistical and story reason. i think he said because they're poor or something. thats just hilarious, he can't even admit it was just to get the girls in the theaters? nothing wrong with admitting that. i assume he doesn't mention their magic pants that come on when they go back to being human despite being ripped to shreds in the transformation.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:01 p.m. CST

    "Hey, everyone. Capone in Chicago here, eagerly awaiting the Wra

    by JuicyFruit

    Spot on!!

  • March 23, 2010, 12:02 p.m. CST

    Havent seen either and...

    by Cal the useless

    I sure as hell wont bother to. This teen emo crap is a slap in the face to the lore of vampires and werewolves alike and its sad to see that a whole new generation will be tainted with shit like this.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:03 p.m. CST

    I don't understand this...

    by josh0rama

    You people say so many CRUEL things about so many movies and then you run an article like this. New Moon is IMMENSELY better than Twilight. WTF? Plus none of you can write, you never check for errors. This site is getting boring. Most of the time when you do run a COOL story I've already read it on Dark Horizons days before.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:06 p.m. CST

    i rented this movie from blockbuster on saturday

    by mrgreentheplant

    for rifftrax purposes. the minute and a half of shame was worth the two hours of genius that would follow.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:06 p.m. CST

    If you like these movies...

    by Fah-Cue

    ... you like balls on your chin.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:09 p.m. CST

    Shirtless Kristen Stewarts-pack

    by Shpadoinkle

    Give the ballhavers what they want. I'd fuck her six ways to Sunday and wipe my greasy cock on my Tron VHS for her any day

  • March 23, 2010, 12:16 p.m. CST

    So Capone...

    by jackalcack're reviewing the shit extras of a shit film that you know nobody on here is interested in and you'll get grief for. Slick.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:18 p.m. CST

    From Dusk Till Dawn


    Carlos: So, what, were they psychos, or... Seth: Did they look like psychos? Is that what they looked like? They were vampires. Psychos do not explode when sunlight hits them, I don't give a fuck how crazy they are! This is a Vampire movie..not that twennie shit.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:18 p.m. CST

    Screw New Moon

    by Rev. Artemis Prime

    I want the Stripes Box set. That beast looks beautiful, but alas, I have to settle for the more moderately priced cd/dvd combo. I envy you Capone.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:19 p.m. CST

    Serious question - What is wrong with people?

    by SmokingRobot

    These movies are not that bad. Why do so many people get off on hating people who enjoy them?

  • March 23, 2010, 12:25 p.m. CST

    My daughter keeps begging me to watch...

    by porterdsgn

    ...these movies with her. I keep breaking her heart and telling her hell no. I'd rather gouge my eyes out with a spoon than watch this crap.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:29 p.m. CST

    Capone what could you possibly expect from the extras?


    You mentioned wanting them to go into all of the intricate parts of making this movie, my question is why? These movies aren't being made for people who love good movies, they are being made for teenage girls who have read the books and don't care that the movies will be an even more watered down version of this story. If you want to geek out on a Twilight dvd then you need to get Guillermo Del Toro to do the next one.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:32 p.m. CST

    I'd tear Kristen Stewart up. God I love her in Panic Room!

    by Dr. Samuel Loomis

  • March 23, 2010, 12:33 p.m. CST


    by OrangeMonkey

    Or you could say that your daughter keeps asking you to watch something with her that she has an interest in but you keep knocking her back. Good work chief. Hell that two hours could be better spent bitching on the internet.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:33 p.m. CST

    I don't think "Deepest Wish" means the same thing

    by The Reluctant Austinite

    to you as it does to me.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:47 p.m. CST

    Nice Marmot...

    by UltimaRex

    No legal way, no. You'll just have to make do with this...

  • March 23, 2010, 12:50 p.m. CST

    ...From Dusk Till Dawn deux

    by yourSTEPDADDY

    KATE: seth? seth, you ok? SETH: Im peachy Kate, the world is my oyster. except i just had to put a shirt onto my brother because he turned into a gay werewolf, even though i dont believe in gay werewolves

  • March 23, 2010, 12:52 p.m. CST


    by Denty420

    Maybe the fact that it contains such corkers as 'I don't have the strength to stay away from you' and the fact that nobody gets bitten, despite it's masquerading as a 'vampire' film.<br> That, plus the film is a complete bag of shit aimed at one gender only. Even Stephen King said that Stephanie Meyer can't write worth a damn. I wouldn't know because I'd rather have a knitting needle shoved down my japs-eye than watch or read any Twilight product.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:53 p.m. CST

    Twatlight News and Bayformers News!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    by Trannyformers_Apologist

    ALL IN ONE WEEK !!!<P> Soooo cool! :D<P> Needs moar Scriptgirl!

  • March 23, 2010, 12:53 p.m. CST


    by porterdsgn

    I do plenty of other stuff with my daughter so I don't think it's really an issue "Chief". We play golf once a week and I sat down a did a puzzle with her for over an hour last night. Might be a good idea to know what the fuck you're talking about douche.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:53 p.m. CST

    People ask me why i keep talking about JJ's FRAUD TREK

    by AsimovLives

    The anwers is pretty simple, really: for the same reason why AICN keeps on pissing and shitting on TWILIGHT day in, day out, spending so much time and man hours dedicated to a movie and movies they profess to hate so much. Same thing. Because when you hate with a passion, it's never tiring.

  • March 23, 2010, 12:54 p.m. CST

    My thoughts on Twilight: New Moon....

    by LargoJr

    It's quite honestly, the newest Wife Beaters training video.. I spent the entire film suffering the urge to punch Bella in the face. <p> The Movie was terrible, the dialogue was horrid, the acting was wooden & painful to watch, and the effects are simply laughable. People tell me the Books are SO much better, so if this movie is like eating a giant shit sammich, the books are like eating same with the crusts cut off and still warm? <p> I have to admit much confusion and bewilderment as well....Bella couldn't bedazzle a stale ham sammich... bitch is just plain annoying. Seriously... it was like watching Popeye and Bluto fight over Olive Oil... GUYS!?!? SERIOUSLY... you couldn't find SOMEBODY worth all the effort? You gotta settle for THIS BITCH????

  • March 23, 2010, 1:02 p.m. CST

    Capone, you needn't subject yourself to this

    by strosmer

    No one on AICN cares about these movies.

  • March 23, 2010, 1:06 p.m. CST

    Twilight stories on AICN seem to be written to MOCK US

    by ricarleite2

  • March 23, 2010, 1:06 p.m. CST

    I completely forgot about Twilight for a minute

    by seppukudkurosawa

    And thought the headline related to a Straight to DVD sequel to Moon.

  • March 23, 2010, 1:09 p.m. CST


    by Shpadoinkle

    It's the shape of her Bella mouth, it purports to accomodate each of us wrong-cocked obsessives. We are many

  • March 23, 2010, 1:15 p.m. CST

    Rifftrax this fucker!

    by readyoufool

    and if you haven't experienced the rifftrax commentary for the first one for the love of God do it!

  • March 23, 2010, 1:17 p.m. CST


    by LargoJr

    So... she coughs up hairballs and her boogers are full of glitter?

  • March 23, 2010, 1:21 p.m. CST


    by idrinkyourmilkshake

    I know it helps with the Hit Count, but it pisses me off.

  • March 23, 2010, 1:45 p.m. CST

    Twilight Stalkers

    by Denty420

    Someone I know is one. Her daddy's got money ten miles up a bull's ass and she spends it all stalking Stewart and Pattinson around the country while filming. She hasn't been laid in God knows how long, probably never actually. This is what Twilight does to some women. I liken it to herpes - it's about as enjoyable anyway.

  • March 23, 2010, 1:47 p.m. CST


    by Sin_Happens

    If you're male and you like Twilight, you're gay. I don't mean that in the derogatory sense, I mean it in the "you want to put your testicles against another man's testicles while gripping handfuls of chesthair" kind of way.

  • March 23, 2010, 1:56 p.m. CST

    Until I see Pattison performing a C-Section with his teeth...

    by Royston Lodge

    ...Twilight does not exist in this dojo.

  • March 23, 2010, 2:14 p.m. CST


    by idrinkyourmilkshake

    details man,details! Are you f'ing serious? What age are we talking?

  • March 23, 2010, 2:23 p.m. CST


    by NippleEffect

    yeah been waiting my whole life for this

  • March 23, 2010, 2:56 p.m. CST

    "youth culture pool full of acid and shit"

    by Jaka

    Yeah, I don't really have much to add after that. Well played, Capone.

  • March 23, 2010, 2:59 p.m. CST


    by Denty420

    26, and a face like a box of frogs. Sorry, dude. That's why she has problems getting laid.

  • March 23, 2010, 3:26 p.m. CST

    It's not great.but...

    by JoLeReE

    It's for tweens and soccer MILFS. But there is one thing I really dug in New Moon. When Jacob 1st turns on screen and that fight occurs, as they tussel, they roll into the woods and "knock over" the POV camera. I geeked out a bit at that.

  • March 23, 2010, 3:55 p.m. CST

    "The werewolves are shirtless because they're poor"

    by Nasty In The Pasty

    THAT is fucking hilarious justifaction. Most homeless people I see tend to have at LEAST shirts on their back.

  • March 23, 2010, 4:26 p.m. CST

    Fuck this movie, fuck Capone for reviewing it

    by Colt19801980

    Twilight is a waste of cinema...I thought you guys loved movies, not cash grab, soap operas. Go fuck yourself Capone, you asked for it bitch.

  • March 23, 2010, 4:29 p.m. CST

    SmokingRobot, I saw Twilight with an open mind

    by MattmanReturns

    It was jarringly bad. The acting and characterizations are atrocious. Is it really so hard to understand why people loathe it? It's like all the romance scenes in Attack of the Clones stretched into an entire 2 hour movie.

  • March 23, 2010, 5:07 p.m. CST


    by JoLeReE

    It's like all the romance scenes in Attack of the Clones stretched into an entire 2 hour movie. *****DEAD ON******

  • March 23, 2010, 5:22 p.m. CST


    by Richard_Christys_Unwashed_Taint

  • March 23, 2010, 6:01 p.m. CST


    by HagCeli

    The first film was pretty good. The second one, not. But it had a nice soundtrack.

  • March 23, 2010, 6:47 p.m. CST

    Needs more BLADE

    by BixbySnyder

    Killing ALL them Suckheads. Nuff said.

  • March 23, 2010, 6:54 p.m. CST

    by BixbySnyder

    "Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice-skate uphill."

  • March 23, 2010, 8:18 p.m. CST

    hahah that's a really funny pic^^^

    by Meadowe

    for those who hate his guts I heard Remember Me has the ending everyone has been asking for.

  • March 23, 2010, 8:58 p.m. CST


    by harshguy

    you nailed it w/ the AOTC analogy <br>My wife drug me to the theater to see Twilight, which I had absolutely 0% knowledge of other than it was a book she read.<br> Now, I am usually a respectful moviegoer (mostly because I fucking HATE IT when someone else around me is being a noisy cunt) and usually keep my mouth shut, by ablout halfway through Twilight I was openly mocking the movie and the poor acting. Fucking movie sucked.

  • March 23, 2010, 8:59 p.m. CST


    by BringingSexyBack

  • March 24, 2010, 2:01 a.m. CST


    by F-18

  • March 24, 2010, 9:09 a.m. CST


    by AsimovLives

    If people in here really loved movies that much, you think they would like, excuse or justify such crap as JJ Abrams's FRAUD TREK or any of the BAYFORMERS movies?

  • March 24, 2010, 10:41 a.m. CST

    NO mention of pontypool at all on the DVD?

    by Series7

    Or why a poster for it was featured in the movie? I bet since they are both Canadian filme some of the team that worked on pontypool just brought a poster in and told Chuck and Buck and suck and fuck that it was a fake movie.

  • March 24, 2010, 11:13 a.m. CST

    Way to sell out!

    by Bodacious_Crumb

    Ridiculous that this horseshit gets it's own article on here and the DVD release no less! Is this site that hard up for traffic? You're really trying to bring in the Cougars, Tweens, Twittering, and Twinks aren't you? Sad.

  • March 24, 2010, 7:56 p.m. CST

    Way to sell out!.....hell yeah

    by MrsSpud

    films and books are such a load of crap, I wasted 2 hours of my life i'll never get back watching the first peice of horseshit. Couldn't finish the first chapter of the first book is was such crud.....pah!

  • March 25, 2010, 6:21 a.m. CST


    by TheDark0Knight

    the first line in ur post is "Seussian" (dr. seuss)

  • March 28, 2010, 7:57 p.m. CST

    ripping into 'films' like this is cathartic,

    by frank cotton

    and some of the comments are hilarious. that's why, morons. if there are real vampires, etc., then when this series has run its course, i expect they will slaughter everyone involved

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